- Location
- Yes.
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Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest
- Thread starter eaglejarl
- Start date
-
- Tags
- naruto rationalist romance armageddon is looking better and better damn you kishimoto explosions everywhere explosives solve everyone if in doubt surrender to the mercy of zabuza it seemed like a good idea at the time looks like a really bad case of being a jōnin my god. where does the lore end? precommitting is the winning plan screaming in kagome screw the rules i have explosives something bad might still happen sometimes you gotta sociopath stabby zabby subsection c of paragraph 9 should include we can weaponize this so hard
- Location
- The state of Paranoia
[X] Don't Drink Dragon's Blood
- Location
- The Void
- Pronouns
- She/Her
Guys you don't go to immediate human testing as soon as you want to do some experiments.
First we give dragon blood to chakra beast and see how that works out. Then to civies. Then we buy some ninja from Oro and test it on them. Then we test it on a SC
and only then do we give it to Hazou.
First we give dragon blood to chakra beast and see how that works out. Then to civies. Then we buy some ninja from Oro and test it on them. Then we test it on a SC
and only then do we give it to Hazou.
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My understanding is that it was an implosion seal modified along the lines of Tunneler's Friend or a UGLSP where it continuously stores air in a certain radius until it is full. That would allow the rock to be dropped in a bubble of vacuum, negating air resistance and drifting off course
The Air Tunnel should make targeting much easier. All the suborbital strike ideas have been a non-starter since their inception because it's simply too difficult to target anything from 12 km up. But with Air Tunnel seals removing the air that would push the rocks slightly off course we can just go straight over the Tsuchikage's residence and drop some rocks, basically guaranteeing a hit. It puts gravity bombing on easy mode.
- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
[QM] Use explosives to make Dragon's Blood. (It's the power source for the ultimate avatar of destruction; what else could it be?)
wHaT? When was this suggested? What was even the plan here???
- Pronouns
- He/Him
I think this was a start-of-the-quest thing, (probably) before knowing the playable character would be male or at what part of the timeline the quest would take place in
- Location
- how about no
A long, long time ago when Hazou was unformed and MfD was only beginning the players gathered together for the first time and began discussing how best to survive in a ninja death-world. One prevailing strategy to secure our character's safety was to defect to Leaf, seduce Sasuke, and have his child since players reasoned the Sharingan would always be in high demand. After much discussion we were allowed to have a bloodline that was an offshoot of the Sharingan on our character that would allow us to have better odds of having children who would inherit real Sharingan rather than most other ninja paramours. Arguments then insued that we would be better able to help the Uchiha if our character was male because having a child growing inside of us seemed like a liability when Oro and others like him could be a concern.
And that's the story of Hazou became a boy and the creation of our first custom bloodline, the Iron Nerve.
Unaligned Player
Agony that desires to meet Extinction
- Location
- Adrift between sanity and madness
- Pronouns
- Shrug
So Hazou is the Hinata to Sasuke's Naruto. Designed from inception to pursue romance and genetic intermingling.
@eaglejarl @Velorien
Got 3 world building questions.
- With that blacksmith we nabbed from Hags, does Hazou know enough to confirm steelback bristle chakra is used for strengthening steel?
- Does he know if chakra beasts parts are commonly used this way for ninja tools, weapons, gear?
- And does Hazou know if ES would be able to interact with residual chakra left in the remains from chakra beasts that used the earth element?
- Location
- Yes.
[X] Interlude: What If Hazou Was A Girl?
Can Hazo be a girl's name?
- Pronouns
- He/Him
You know if Female!Hazou then also isn't a lesbian or Bisexual that could probably result in some very interesting character conflict.AKANE: *does not have physical attraction to girls*
KEI:
Especially if Noburi starts crushing on Female!Hazou at the start of the quest instead of Kei like he originally did until that plotpoint kinda died off completely after the first Isan arc.
[X] Interlude: What If Hazou Was A Girl?
realistically tho Hazou being a girl would probably have a bunch of butterfly effects before the "Hidden Swamp Incident" even happens.
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- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Hazō isn't even a boy's name.
MrRobot
In doubt there's always the Sun!
AKANE: *does not have physical attraction to girls*
KEI:
Also, from what i understand the reason Kei did not go for hazou was nothing to do with his gender and more to do that she was desperately in love with mari.
I dont think it would change much
Eisenhelm
gran dutch of douchery
- Location
- Colombia
what would change is Ami proposing marriage to him ..hmm her?
in any case she would have proposed marriage to nobury and that would have been the second time in a row that happened.
also Akane's storyline would have gone much different.
I chalk it up to linguistic drift.
It is highly likely that many Goketsu families are naming their sons after Hazo, not to mention the civilian population.
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Eisenhelm
gran dutch of douchery
- Location
- Colombia
that will be awkward when he is declared a traitor.
Interlude: Field Research, Part 2
- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Interlude: Field Research, Part 2
"Akane," Snowflake said slowly, gazing at the appalling spectacle before her, "clearly, observing Kei's relationships with Hazō, Noburi, and even Yuno has caused you to feel left out, so please allow me, in my capacity as her clone, to bestow your first threat of vicious murder for iniquities inflicted upon our person."
The outdoor dining table sat amidst the last snows of winter, with the warm indoor area temporarily closed for cleaning in the middle of lunchtime. The silence of a total lack of customers, also in the middle of lunchtime, was louder than a complaining Hyūga Neji. The menu lied. The waiter stared at her with the vivid horror of a man once threatened with the scaly annihilation of all he held dear. Yes, there was no mistaking where Akane had brought her.
Rather than quail in her boots as any mortal should when faced with a wrathful Snowflake (clearly, additional tips from Kei would be required), Akane nodded seriously.
"I see we're going to have to start from the basics. Snowflake, threatening people on your first date is not appropriate behaviour and may put them off. Actually, you probably shouldn't threaten people on any date unless you know they're into that kind of thing."
Snowflake duly wrote this down.
"Is that common?" she asked.
"A lot of things about Hazō make more sense if you assume that on some level he enjoys threats to his life," Akane said. "To say nothing of Noburi's entire romantic history. So now I think about it, maybe it's more common than I thought."
Snowflake duly wrote this down as well.
"And so," Snowflake concluded, "since it is impossible for you to credibly threaten my life, you have opted for the alternative of threatening my sanity with a meal at the Yabai Café, being fully aware that acute food poisoning is arguably the most traumatic physical experience of my life so far. I commend your lateral thinking. Now, to return to the topic of your rapidly plummeting physical safety..."
"What? Nonono," Akane shook her hands hurriedly in front of her as if Snowflake's wrath were a cloud of particularly weak-willed insects. "You're here so I can introduce you to an important Leaf kunoichi tradition. It's said that any relationship that can survive a first date at the Yabai Café will be able to survive anything. Except maybe a second date at the Yabai Café."
That gave Snowflake pause. Would a person going on a second date with Snowflake truly be in the same relationship as they were the first time? Snowflake chose to believe that she was the same person every day, as much so as anyone else, but it was impossible to objectively verify that this was true. Her studies had not provided conclusive evidence as to where people kept their memories—some pointed to the brain, others the soul, and a number of philosophers had made persuasive arguments for the heart, personal chakra, and the pancreas. A dispelled Snowflake had none of these; her memories were kept in Kei, and every new Snowflake was derived not from herself but from Kei, together with new Kei memories influencing her personality that the previous Snowflake had not possessed. Perhaps when Snowflake was dispelled tonight, she would die forever, and Kei's next creation would never know.
Was she permitted romance if she could not promise a lover that she would still exist tomorrow?
"Very well," Snowflake conceded. "I suppose I have nothing to lose by trying, except possibly the rest of my existence. Then again, that is a gamble faced by every patron of this establishment."
She raised her hand.
"Waiter!"
"Y-Yes, My Lady?"
"Two daily specials, if you would be so cruel," Snowflake said. She strongly suspected that, given Kei's past experiences here, studying the menu would bring only nausea.
"Snowflake!" Akane hissed. "Being polite to the staff is a cornerstone of good dating etiquette."
"Apologies," Snowflake said. The waiter inexplicably flinched. "Please inflict two daily specials upon us."
"Snowflake..."
"I was merely being objecti--oh, fine. I would be grateful if you bestowed upon us two daily specials."
The waiter muttered something unintelligible which Snowflake chose to take as affirmation, and fled before Akane could do something foolish, such as ask what the daily special was.
-o-
Snowflake soon regretted her anticipatory hypothetical condemnation of Akane. The plate before her contained nothing but a completely innocent-looking steak with a side of salad. Nothing wriggled, gibbered, glowed, or whispered haunting offers. The steak was the light brown of well-done steak, estimated (after poking it with a knife) at 250 grams in weight and 3 centimetres thick, with a surface area of 60 centimetres squared—all plausible values. It even smelled like other beef steaks Snowflake had eaten. The salad, too, matched the parameters for vegetables available in winter in the Fire Country, or imported at affordable rates based on the tables Kei had memorised.
Snowflake had not known such terror since learning how close Kei had come to Orochimaru's operating table.
Summoning up all of her courage from the depths of the soul she did not possess, Snowflake took a hesitant first bite.
It tasted like steak.
Snowflake took a disbelieving second bite. Reality failed to catch up to her.
Snowflake swallowed, and waited anxiously for some kind of palate-obliterating aftertaste.
Nothing.
Across the table, Akane had taken a full mouthful of salad, and was still alive, conscious, and even smiling.
"Waiter!" Snowflake snapped.
The pale man was at her side instantly.
"Y-Yes, My Lady?"
"This cannot possibly be a Yabai Café meal. Explain yourself."
The man went paler still, an exceptional feat without the application of makeup.
"Y-You are Lady Nara Kei and Lady Gōketsu Akane, are you not?"
There was that familiar little stab. But of course, Kei was famous, or infamous to some, and Akane's identity could be inferred from clothing and context. Snowflake was no one.
"Supposing, hypothetically, that we were…?"
"W-We could not possibly serve an ordinary meal to honoured p-personages such as yourselves," the waiter stammered, clearly aware that his fate hung in the balance, though not that, as Gōketsu, they were regrettably inclined to spare his ilk.
"I require an authentic experience for my research," Snowflake said coldly. "Remove this travesty from my sight and prepare my chosen order immediately."
"Snowflake," Akane muttered, "remember what I said about being polite."
"Not in this instance, Akane," Snowflake stated flatly. "This man has seen fit to impugn the honour of my implied potential lover, whose judgement, good taste, and ability to provide a satisfactory first date are being undermined in my eyes by the establishment's failure to meet expectations. Now, you, heed my command or suffer."
She thrust out her plate towards the waiter like a sword aimed at his heart.
The waiter stared at them goggle-eyed. "M-My humblest apologies, My Ladies. I did not realise you were on a d-date."
Oh. Oops.
Opposite her, Akane gazed longingly at her delicious steak for a couple of seconds, then resigned herself to the need for academic rigour and handed over her plate as well.
-o-
To be continued. Apologies for delay/low levels of content/etc.
Voting remains closed.
- Location
- Yes.
WE'RE ALL GONNA DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
- Location
- Liverpool
Your speed continues to scare me faflec. I was on the site with the page open and everything when it dropped.
Honestly, I'm now entertaining ideas that instead of a multi-time instance of an individual, you're just a digital entity that chooses to haunt this thread.
The update was great. Thank you Vel, and sorry things are rough. Always enjoy Snowflake and Akane, let alone both at once.
Honestly, I'm now entertaining ideas that instead of a multi-time instance of an individual, you're just a digital entity that chooses to haunt this thread.
The update was great. Thank you Vel, and sorry things are rough. Always enjoy Snowflake and Akane, let alone both at once.