...perhaps we are redundant...
Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest
- Thread starter eaglejarl
- Start date
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- Tags
- naruto rationalist romance armageddon is looking better and better damn you kishimoto explosions everywhere explosives solve everyone if in doubt surrender to the mercy of zabuza it seemed like a good idea at the time looks like a really bad case of being a jōnin my god. where does the lore end? precommitting is the winning plan screaming in kagome screw the rules i have explosives something bad might still happen sometimes you gotta sociopath stabby zabby subsection c of paragraph 9 should include we can weaponize this so hard open voting
Vecht
Self-Requested Ban
- Location
- Snarksville, Snarkland
I'll trade you a minor favor for you going one day seriously considering what the world would look like if the particular facet of your worldview that prompted you to phrase that sentence thusly were not only wrong, but deeply flawed and antithetical to actuality.
Nah, that sounds like work.
- Location
- Italy
And this is why i proposed it, how are we supposed to find out otherwise?
My opinion is "Let's use the Ami training to foster closer relationship with people that could become our allies when we can"
And the fact it would be hilarious.
Easier method: let slip to Ino that Naruto has been arranged to be married to Ami, then observe until the gossip reaches Hinata.
JulieK
Unintentionally funny
- Location
- Israel
I'm surprised we don't just speak of QM chakra-levels.
- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Not to put too a fine point on it, but isn't that literally the kind of scenario that the rest of Akatsuki were there to prevent?
As a purely mechanical issue, you don't get buffs from having a teacher around. IC, having a teacher around is how you train, at least whenever possible. Of course Hazō is going to seek out Kagome or Jiraiya to pick up sealing tips from instead of holing up in his room practising his brushwork. Likewise, how far would you get with your taijutsu training if you couldn't find a competent sparring partner? All ninja seek out the best teacher they can get without incurring unacceptable costs.
Which is not to say there isn't meaningful impact. Having been inducted into the sealing arts by Kagome, Hazō is much more safety-conscious than the average sealmaster of his level. Having gained all his social training from Mari, Hazō instantly recognised Ami's seduction attempt, and wouldn't things have got interesting if he hadn't?
Wait, are you saying I need to assume corporeal form?
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Skywalker seals and the economy
- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
All sealmasters capable of making skywalkers are required to make at least 100 of them per month as a tax to the Tower. (That's about 17 hours of work per month.) After that, all additional production must be sold to the Tower at a standardized price of N ryō/seal, where N is 150% of the next highest-value seal (assessed on a per-element basis) has a standard rate. Currently N = R200. It's been made clear in a non-official statement that this is a temporary arrangement and if it results in an inadequate number of seals coming in then the tax will be increased.
In addition, there is a one-time payment of R10,000 ($1,000) for any sealmaster who can demonstrate they are capable of making skywalkers. Demonstrating this is as easy as booking an appointment with a 3-person team of Tower-certified sealmasters (none of them from the same clan, or from your clan) and then making a skywalker in front of them. Everyone who knows sealing is strongly encouraged to get authorized; malingering by not getting authorized when you are in fact skilled enough (in the judgement of the Tower) to learn to make skywalkers carries penalties.
A skywalker seal is a pair of elements, meaning it takes 10 minutes to scribe. You can produce 6 skywalkers per hour at a rate of R200/skywalker, so that's an effective rate of R1200 (i.e. $120)/hour.
As of the latest assessment, you are earning a total of R120,000 / month from skywalkers: R60,000 cash-in-hand from Kagome spending 50 hours / month and R60,000 cash-in-hand from other sealmasters selling to the tower. You are also receiving R240,000 / month into the credit account with the Tower. The monies earned to date have already been figured into your current bank balance.
Note that every sealmaster has the following tax obligations per month:
100 skywalkers [1,000 minutes]
50 Alarm seals [250 minutes]
100 explosives [500 minutes]
For a total of 29 hours/month of tax-mandated unpaid labor, or ~7 hours/week.
Important fact: Using skywalkers without specific approval from the Tower is considered high treason. They want all production going to them, not getting stockpiled by the clans.
EDIT:
Note that when it says "150% of the next most valuable seal", that is assessed on a per-element basis. So, skywalkers are 150% the value, per element, of the next most valuable seal.
Skywalkers are R200 for a 2-element seal, meaning R100/element.The next most valuable seal is 5SB, which is R75/element, meaning that the Tower will pay R375 overall for a 5SB seal.
The original part was modified to reflect this information.
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- Location
- France
Aw, shit. This probably includes us, right?
There goes one of our best mission tools. Hopefully whoever is Hokage won't send us off on difficult missions without allowing us to use any. That would suck.
Hiashi sucks
- Location
- Yes.
What is the next highest-value seal, can we make it? How may seal components is it made of?
- Location
- The Void
- Pronouns
- She/Her
@Noumero can we ask who is running the tower/deciding who commits treason? Cause they seem like they are actually in charge right now
Why do we care about being able to make it? All we care if we can raise the value of the next highest seal.
- Location
- Yes.
Personal opinion says that the Tower is just going through the motions and extending approvals for Skywalker usage, and refusing approvals for new Skywalker usages.
Training tasks usually don't send people to jail upon failure or cause bad things on success.
We asked Keiko about this? And why do we care about all other seals?
Wait, I suppose the tower might tell us to stop. Unlikely though.
- Location
- Yes.
Skywalkers make R150/5 min because they're two seals instead of one, so it takes 10 minutes to finish a R300 set. If we have another seal we can sell for R151-200 but is only 1 seal it's more efficient.
We produce skywalkers at the rate of 200R, not 300R. Price of skywalker is determined to be 1.5x of the next most valuable seal.
This makes the next most valuable seal at 133.33R per unit.
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- Location
- Yes.
*looks shit over*
Yeah, you're right. It still means the same, though; any singular seal we can make and sell for R101-133 is still more efficient to make than Skywalkers.
I think that would be an oversight by the QMs if the next most valuable seal is preferred over skywalker. If intentionally, we can send Mari to negotiate.
- Location
- Europe
@Noumero , we should check if we are even allowed to share the Information with anyone, I don't know who gave us the briefing, but Kagome might not have the clearence. The only reason we might know is because we are acting Clan head.
Maybe add something about learning about the other clans? Bloodlines, area of expertise, history, etc. We have zero knowledge about them beyond who they support as possible Hokage, if we know more about them we would have better insight in how to deal with them after all.
Can we please not suggest to Mari and Kagome to contact them, especially now? Learning more about them and their possible future intent is fine, but "contacting" them seems like bad idea.
Maybe add something about learning about the other clans? Bloodlines, area of expertise, history, etc. We have zero knowledge about them beyond who they support as possible Hokage, if we know more about them we would have better insight in how to deal with them after all.
Can we please not suggest to Mari and Kagome to contact them, especially now? Learning more about them and their possible future intent is fine, but "contacting" them seems like bad idea.
Chapter 267.2: In Which Keiko Allows Something to Not Be Her Fault
- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
January 5, 1069 AS, immediately following from Hazō and Keiko's Clear Communication Technique session.
Hazō retracted the rolled-up broadsheet.
"One more issue before we drop this subject and move on to that thing Noburi claims we'll be able to do with enough practice."
"Being normal people having normal conversations?"
"He's always been an optimist. At any rate, we've established that the Gōketsu are behind you on your decision. We've established it several times. Yes?"
Keiko nodded.
"I've had a chance to think about the practicalities," Hazō said, "and how does this sound: you tell the Pangolins that I, as Gōketsu Clan Head, have unilaterally terminated the skytower contract, and you as an individual had no input on this decision and don't want it to impact on your personal relationship with the Pangolin Clan. That protects your summoner status, and hopefully preserves your tessera as well."
"You would do this for me?" Keiko asked disbelievingly. "But I have already told you that summons hold contracts sacred above all else. They are one of the few institutions mandated directly by the Pantokrator—excuse me, the Sage of Six Paths—as opposed to being interpretations of his teachings by his contemporaries. To terminate such unilaterally is regarded in much the same light as divulging clan secrets is on the Human Path.
"You cannot afford to do this, Hazō, not if you intend to later resume your work on the Seventh Path through Noburi and the Toads. Please, allow me and me alone to pay the price for my actions."
"No," Hazō said bluntly. "It's not a unilateral termination anyway. They get advance warning and a month's shipment. That's how you're supposed to act when ending an agreement in good faith. Have you spoken to them already?"
Keiko looked down at the table. "Something else I have been delaying until the last moment out of fear. If I were to come to them with the news that I had betrayed them in a time of need, and then have to face them a second time when making the final delivery…"
"All right," Hazō said. "Let's table that for now. Instead, assume for a second that we, the rest of the clan, are actually competent and can handle the fallout of cancelling the contract, ideally with your help. How do you feel about the idea?"
Keiko hesitated.
"I feel both guilty and relieved. On the assumption that it is somehow reasonable for you to accept punishment for another's crime… this has the potential to preserve my future."
"What do you mean?"
"My summoner status comprises the entirety of my personal value," Keiko explained matter-of-factly. "My combat skills are chūnin-level at best. My talent as a Mori is, as I have told you many times, merely mediocre within my former clan, and you overestimate it solely based on lack of grounds for a comparison. Certainly, given my missed years of training, I expect to be among the weakest of the Nara."
Not this again.
"Summoners are rare. Valuable. Each one potentially worth their weight in gold, and yes, I appreciate the irony. Divest me of that, as the Pangolins might well do if they ever perceive me as a liability, and I am no more than a child with erratic agency, questionable social skills, and catastrophic self-esteem issues.
"All of which I had already decided to be an acceptable price to pay to prevent the deaths of thousands. The idea that I can accomplish said intent without said price is… revolutionary. Imagine being able to accomplish Uplift without a single massacre of historic proportions."
"Uh, Keiko…"
"Thank you, Hazō," she said, meeting his eyes. "I mean it."
"Any time," Hazō said, as if there was any possible way a situation this bizarre could come up again in the future.
"There will be consequences," Keiko added. "Both for me and for the Gōketsu. Please do not overlook this. I may still find myself losing my tessera, insofar as they were part of the deal rather than a reward I earned through my own performance. If I am to keep them, and generally preserve my status despite my association with you, I expect to be sent on more missions than I have been thus far. Perhaps even military missions against other clans, and I remain conflicted over the possibility, given that it would be hypocritical on the one hand, and that I am in fact a ninja on the other. There may be other consequences for me associated with the blow to Pangolin military power, to be endured regardless of who was responsible for the contract's termination.
"More pressingly, I am concerned by the broader implications. On the Human Path, we are aware that the other villages will already be in the process of reverse-engineering skywalkers. Mist and Sand have samples borne by their survivors. Rock and Cloud will have procured them from opportunistic battlefield looting by their Chūnin Exam attendees. They could hardly be denied access to the place where their Kage died, and it would have been impossible to recover all the skywalkers before they arrived.
"On the Seventh Path, the Pangolins will be forced to suspend their conquest, indeed to withdraw any forces that suddenly find themselves overextended. Their enemies will already have assumed skytowers to be seals, ninjutsu, or previously-unseen racial abilities. Some, in consultation with summoners or more advanced clans like the Crows, may also have pondered the possibility of sophisticated mechanical devices. Let us generously assume that none have already deduced the truth. Of the items listed, only one can disappear without trace from the Pangolin arsenal within the space of a month.
"It takes little imagination to connect the two. Leaf has advanced sealing technology it did not previously display. The Pangolin Clan, associated with the Gōketsu of Leaf, has advanced sealing technology which it did not previously display. Add a few choice details, such as the timing and circumstances of our arrival in Leaf, the presence of multiple sealmasters among our ranks, your extraordinary attack on Kotsuzui—"
"I thought I covered that up pretty well," Hazō interrupted.
"Supposing for argument's sake that your justification was plausible and there were no sensory ninja in the audience… what kind of imbecile would attempt to use explosives at melee range in the first place unless they believed they had a special means of protecting themselves?
"Regardless, and setting aside the fact that you are the brother of the Heavily-Armoured Melee Combat Clan Summoner, I hope you accept my greater point.
"It is not that I propose withdrawing my decision. In the same way as you believe Uplift to be unambiguously for the greater good, I believe this to be unambiguously for the greater good. In the same way that you are dedicated to Uplift beyond the psychological point of no return, I am past the point where I could continue to facilitate genocide, as a simple matter of personal identity.
"However, there will be dangers you need to consider. You can safely assume that the combined information from both Paths has pinpointed the Gōketsu as dangerously powerful sealmasters, or will soon. You can safely assume that we will be considered priority targets by our enemies: exceedingly valuable to capture or at least kill, yet with limited power to defend ourselves. The Human Path counts down to the Fourth World War. The Seventh Path now counts down to the Pangolins' defeat, whereupon the hostile summoners and their clans, including those made hostile by the Pangolins' warmongering, will be free to turn their attention to us.
"Countermeasures will be essential. I will assist as best I can, within the bounds of the Nara contracts I have already signed. However, understand that despite my best efforts, I remain myself. I cannot propose brilliant solutions, only optimise their implementation."
Hazō nodded seriously. "I guess it's nothing we wouldn't have had to deal with sooner or later. But we can talk practicalities when the clan is ready and Leaf isn't threatening to come down about our ears. For now, are we agreed on me taking responsibility for ending the contract?"
"The proper response would commence with a thorough reminder of my general unworthiness, and proceed deep into familiar realms of self-castigation. However,"—she smiled—"insofar as you are still holding the rolled-up broadsheet, I will choose to omit them on this occasion.
"Please accept my sincere gratitude for your support. You will regret it."
Hazō retracted the rolled-up broadsheet.
"One more issue before we drop this subject and move on to that thing Noburi claims we'll be able to do with enough practice."
"Being normal people having normal conversations?"
"He's always been an optimist. At any rate, we've established that the Gōketsu are behind you on your decision. We've established it several times. Yes?"
Keiko nodded.
"I've had a chance to think about the practicalities," Hazō said, "and how does this sound: you tell the Pangolins that I, as Gōketsu Clan Head, have unilaterally terminated the skytower contract, and you as an individual had no input on this decision and don't want it to impact on your personal relationship with the Pangolin Clan. That protects your summoner status, and hopefully preserves your tessera as well."
"You would do this for me?" Keiko asked disbelievingly. "But I have already told you that summons hold contracts sacred above all else. They are one of the few institutions mandated directly by the Pantokrator—excuse me, the Sage of Six Paths—as opposed to being interpretations of his teachings by his contemporaries. To terminate such unilaterally is regarded in much the same light as divulging clan secrets is on the Human Path.
"You cannot afford to do this, Hazō, not if you intend to later resume your work on the Seventh Path through Noburi and the Toads. Please, allow me and me alone to pay the price for my actions."
"No," Hazō said bluntly. "It's not a unilateral termination anyway. They get advance warning and a month's shipment. That's how you're supposed to act when ending an agreement in good faith. Have you spoken to them already?"
Keiko looked down at the table. "Something else I have been delaying until the last moment out of fear. If I were to come to them with the news that I had betrayed them in a time of need, and then have to face them a second time when making the final delivery…"
"All right," Hazō said. "Let's table that for now. Instead, assume for a second that we, the rest of the clan, are actually competent and can handle the fallout of cancelling the contract, ideally with your help. How do you feel about the idea?"
Keiko hesitated.
"I feel both guilty and relieved. On the assumption that it is somehow reasonable for you to accept punishment for another's crime… this has the potential to preserve my future."
"What do you mean?"
"My summoner status comprises the entirety of my personal value," Keiko explained matter-of-factly. "My combat skills are chūnin-level at best. My talent as a Mori is, as I have told you many times, merely mediocre within my former clan, and you overestimate it solely based on lack of grounds for a comparison. Certainly, given my missed years of training, I expect to be among the weakest of the Nara."
Not this again.
"Summoners are rare. Valuable. Each one potentially worth their weight in gold, and yes, I appreciate the irony. Divest me of that, as the Pangolins might well do if they ever perceive me as a liability, and I am no more than a child with erratic agency, questionable social skills, and catastrophic self-esteem issues.
"All of which I had already decided to be an acceptable price to pay to prevent the deaths of thousands. The idea that I can accomplish said intent without said price is… revolutionary. Imagine being able to accomplish Uplift without a single massacre of historic proportions."
"Uh, Keiko…"
"Thank you, Hazō," she said, meeting his eyes. "I mean it."
"Any time," Hazō said, as if there was any possible way a situation this bizarre could come up again in the future.
"There will be consequences," Keiko added. "Both for me and for the Gōketsu. Please do not overlook this. I may still find myself losing my tessera, insofar as they were part of the deal rather than a reward I earned through my own performance. If I am to keep them, and generally preserve my status despite my association with you, I expect to be sent on more missions than I have been thus far. Perhaps even military missions against other clans, and I remain conflicted over the possibility, given that it would be hypocritical on the one hand, and that I am in fact a ninja on the other. There may be other consequences for me associated with the blow to Pangolin military power, to be endured regardless of who was responsible for the contract's termination.
"More pressingly, I am concerned by the broader implications. On the Human Path, we are aware that the other villages will already be in the process of reverse-engineering skywalkers. Mist and Sand have samples borne by their survivors. Rock and Cloud will have procured them from opportunistic battlefield looting by their Chūnin Exam attendees. They could hardly be denied access to the place where their Kage died, and it would have been impossible to recover all the skywalkers before they arrived.
"On the Seventh Path, the Pangolins will be forced to suspend their conquest, indeed to withdraw any forces that suddenly find themselves overextended. Their enemies will already have assumed skytowers to be seals, ninjutsu, or previously-unseen racial abilities. Some, in consultation with summoners or more advanced clans like the Crows, may also have pondered the possibility of sophisticated mechanical devices. Let us generously assume that none have already deduced the truth. Of the items listed, only one can disappear without trace from the Pangolin arsenal within the space of a month.
"It takes little imagination to connect the two. Leaf has advanced sealing technology it did not previously display. The Pangolin Clan, associated with the Gōketsu of Leaf, has advanced sealing technology which it did not previously display. Add a few choice details, such as the timing and circumstances of our arrival in Leaf, the presence of multiple sealmasters among our ranks, your extraordinary attack on Kotsuzui—"
"I thought I covered that up pretty well," Hazō interrupted.
"Supposing for argument's sake that your justification was plausible and there were no sensory ninja in the audience… what kind of imbecile would attempt to use explosives at melee range in the first place unless they believed they had a special means of protecting themselves?
"Regardless, and setting aside the fact that you are the brother of the Heavily-Armoured Melee Combat Clan Summoner, I hope you accept my greater point.
"It is not that I propose withdrawing my decision. In the same way as you believe Uplift to be unambiguously for the greater good, I believe this to be unambiguously for the greater good. In the same way that you are dedicated to Uplift beyond the psychological point of no return, I am past the point where I could continue to facilitate genocide, as a simple matter of personal identity.
"However, there will be dangers you need to consider. You can safely assume that the combined information from both Paths has pinpointed the Gōketsu as dangerously powerful sealmasters, or will soon. You can safely assume that we will be considered priority targets by our enemies: exceedingly valuable to capture or at least kill, yet with limited power to defend ourselves. The Human Path counts down to the Fourth World War. The Seventh Path now counts down to the Pangolins' defeat, whereupon the hostile summoners and their clans, including those made hostile by the Pangolins' warmongering, will be free to turn their attention to us.
"Countermeasures will be essential. I will assist as best I can, within the bounds of the Nara contracts I have already signed. However, understand that despite my best efforts, I remain myself. I cannot propose brilliant solutions, only optimise their implementation."
Hazō nodded seriously. "I guess it's nothing we wouldn't have had to deal with sooner or later. But we can talk practicalities when the clan is ready and Leaf isn't threatening to come down about our ears. For now, are we agreed on me taking responsibility for ending the contract?"
"The proper response would commence with a thorough reminder of my general unworthiness, and proceed deep into familiar realms of self-castigation. However,"—she smiled—"insofar as you are still holding the rolled-up broadsheet, I will choose to omit them on this occasion.
"Please accept my sincere gratitude for your support. You will regret it."
-o-
A/N: A missing piece of the previous plan, added for reasons I suspect may be clear.
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