Technically, doesn't that require adding "only"?He didn't murder a single civilian. If I had meant to say "he didn't murder any civilians" then I would have said that.
Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest
- Thread starter eaglejarl
- Start date
-
- Tags
- naruto rationalist romance armageddon is looking better and better damn you kishimoto explosions everywhere explosives solve everyone if in doubt surrender to the mercy of zabuza it seemed like a good idea at the time looks like a really bad case of being a jōnin my god. where does the lore end? precommitting is the winning plan screaming in kagome screw the rules i have explosives something bad might still happen sometimes you gotta sociopath stabby zabby subsection c of paragraph 9 should include we can weaponize this so hard
- Location
- USA
- Pronouns
- He/Him
It's a linguistic ambiguity. If someone asks you "Are there 2 people in that room?" and there are in fact 4 then you can answer either yes or no and be technically correct. It depends on whether you parse the question as "Are there exactly 2 people in that room?" or "Are there at least 2 people in that room?"
EDIT. Missed this one:
Nope, I am not saying that.So what you're saying is Jiraiya had Minami killed.
Last edited:
#minaminikkowasaninsidejobHe didn't murder a single civilian. If I had meant to say "he didn't murder any civilians" then I would have said that.
I never lie to y'all, but sometimes I'm very precise with my wording. (Also, sometimes I'm wrong or forgetful, but this wasn't one of those times.)
Sounds like fun. There is an enemy-occupied island in desperate need of being turned into a glow-in-the-dark parking lot.
Being a paranoid nutjob is fun
It really isn't. Trust me on this one.
- Location
- Finland
I think that a part of working to make the world a better place should involve considering whether nuking a group of people who aren't threatening us in any way, even if those people are on some level considered enemies for the time being, is the correct thing to do.
Just because we can kill a bunch of Rock ninja (and possibly others, we don't know) doesn't mean it's the right thing to do. Even for a scroll. We'll probably have to negotiate with Rock eventually to achieve world peace.
Just because we can kill a bunch of Rock ninja (and possibly others, we don't know) doesn't mean it's the right thing to do. Even for a scroll. We'll probably have to negotiate with Rock eventually to achieve world peace.
- Location
- The Soviet Republic of Canuckistan
- Pronouns
- He/Him
[X] Action plan: in which FaintlySorcerous invokes Cunningham's Law
Word count: 299
Word count: 299
- Keiko:
- Spend FP to have stored beast corpses, send to Leaf.
- Ami:
- We're really happy to see you.
- We're neck-deep in matters of village opsec.
- We want your help, but we need to get clearance from Asuma first.
- Can you tell us what you already know?
- Ask Akane to leave, engage the IN to avoid showing tells.
- Asuma
- Tone: we wish to avoid treason.
- Check Asuma understands why Hidan supports us.
- We can make requests, but they must further Uplift. We can't bluff him, so we must believe it'll help.
- If Hidan reaches out, can we ask for the Spider scroll?
- If you become convinced the Dragons are real, can we brief Itachi via Hidan?
- If Hidan talk goes well, ask for holy symbol.
- Ami:
- What can we tell her about Isan/Dragons?
- She's a valuable resource, wants Keiko to succeed, universe to exist.
- What can we tell her about Isan/Dragons?
- Give meat scrolls.
- Tone: we wish to avoid treason.
- Ami, redux
- We're legitimately glad to see you and not for your value as a problem-solver.
- However, we have many problems.
- If we didn't trade in favours, trade them in now.
- Ask cost before accepting help.
- If allowed…
- Isan
- We want an alliance/to ultimately depose the High Priest; ideally, with the same move.
- Attempting an Ami maneuver.
- Any advice? Material help?
- Dragons
- Do you know anything?
- Isan
- Keiko/Mari
- Keiko doesn't believe she has any agency because of Mari.
- We're concerned Mari isn't sure she knows how to be a person/feels that she must control everything.
- Concerned she never healed from Hana.
- We love them both, want them to heal.
- Achieving dichotomous goals with a single master plan is your speciality. Help?
- Bank run
- Do you know what happened?
- We want the truth, not a specific outcome.
- We're legitimately glad to see you and not for your value as a problem-solver.
- We want to play board games when we're not half-dead.
- Give letters for Hana.
- Location
- Finland
He didn't murder a single civilian. If I had meant to say "he didn't murder any civilians" then I would have said that.
I never lie to y'all, but sometimes I'm very precise with my wording. (Also, sometimes I'm wrong or forgetful, but this wasn't one of those times.)
Just because you merely used misleading wording rather than outright lies doesn't mean we can trust your word. After all, it could be misleading.
Noumero
Omit Needless Words
We did!
Competent, good spontaneous teamwork, friendly despite being from an enemy state. Should see if she'd be interested in joining the polycule.
Oh, maybe that's what's happening? Maybe she's from the Tama Clan, she's the Arachnid Summoner, and the entire Dragons debacle is her initiating Thinker-style flirting? The Tama Bloodline is supposed to make them hyperfocus on their goal to the exclusion of all other considerations, so the craziness fits. It all fits!
Yuno'll have nothing on her.
Edit: Oh, Hazou storming that training facility is her idea of the first date. He absolutely must go in person.
Edit 3: Practicality-wise, I'd guess the Dragon we saw was actually an Archaeopteryx accomplice, and while the seal is real and might actually imprison some horror, it's not necessarily the Dragons and it's not leaking. Not to exclude the possibility she actually compromised the seal's integrity. This post is only 80% a joke.
Edit 2: And before you dismiss me entirely, remember that:
Last edited:
- Location
- Europe
This is a terrible idea.
First, involving other people like that has never worked, Hana wasn't willing to hold back against Mari, Jiraiya attacked her with actual ninjutsu and Mari put Ami's face into a soup bowl (the last encounter was technically made by both GM's, but it still didn't help).
Second, Ami threatened to remove Mari from Keiko's life before:
Ami might be more willing to work with Mari than Hana, but now it's:
Stole my sister, hurt her, attacked me and still didn't apologize.
At some point Ami will just be out of patience and we really don't need another person being hostile towards Mari.
And Ami's previous solution with their own parents wasn't some kind of talk between them, she just decided to block Keiko from meeting them. It really doesn't matter if her parents were neglectful or worse, as far as we know Ami never gave Keiko the chance to talk to them about this.
As for the agency thing, that goes back to Keiko's life in Mist with the Mori:
Mari just couldn't fix this.
Right now Keiko just doesn't really trust Mari, involving Ami isn't going to be very helpful and while Keiko has developed since then, this is how much Keiko was worshipping Ami:
This can go horrible wrong. If not now then maybe later.
Some of our more successful plans were just 1v1 talks and this time talking with Keiko and Mari at the same time is probably a safer idea.
Last edited:
- Pronouns
- They/Them
[X] Action plan: in which FaintlySorcerous invokes Cunningham's Law
Don't tempt me.
- Location
- The Maple Syrup Mountains
After seeing the post-chapter discussion, I think Asuma already ruled out us sending Hidan to get the Scroll for us, so we should probably nix that line.
Talking about Itachi should imo be attempted only in the context of a decently exhaustive list of things we could ask Hidan for, rather than as a specific point we want to draw attention to. That way, if Asuma immediately goes 'yeah no no way am I letting you and him get in contact again' it's just another item crossed off the list and we might not get seen as more of a traitor for suggesting it.
Holy symbol line should imo go more like 'Ask for holy symbol back, in case Hidan wants to see it next time'. Having the rationale there is important, and I don't see a need for it to be conditional on talks going well, since it's a simple way to reduce the amount of ways the next meeting could go wrong.
Overall I feel this section needs a bit more room allocated to it, if only to provide an actual list of ideas to nestle the 'inform Itachi' option into.
- Location
- Europe
Asuma already told us once that he wants Hidan/Akatsuki to talk to us:
As long as we ask him before and have a good reason he shouldn't be that angry.
Tua
鸡肉面条汤
- Location
- شوربة الدجاج المعكرونة
Asuma likes us enough to actually point out his line of reasoning which is nice of him.
This, though. This here:
Is where Shikaku.jpg transformed into Asuma.jpg.
It doesn't stick, not completely, but it was beautiful while it lasted.
This, though. This here:
Is where Shikaku.jpg transformed into Asuma.jpg.
It doesn't stick, not completely, but it was beautiful while it lasted.
- Location
- America
The first method I thought of that would be safe and deniable would be Leaf's version of the Collapse, returned on Rock. Instead of a massive sinkhole, we drop RFGs from so high up that we can't even be seen. If creating a massive sinkhole beneath the Leaf Village didn't start a war, dropping stuff on a Rock facility shouldn't.
1. Skywalker above Rock facility. Test and refine high-altitude skywalker use beforehand to prevent moisture, cold, and oxygen problems.
2. Set up a wide base of skytowers.
3. Unseal massive amounts of stone, probably granite, onto the skytowers. Connecting the granite pillars together or making rudimentary fins would be helpful, but difficult. I was initially thinking of steel columns that could be easily latched together, but Leaf probably doesn't have metal in the quantities we want to spend.
4. Break all the skytowers simultaneously, raining down a manmade meteor of thousands of tons of rocks.
5. Watch as kinetic energy obliterates the Rock facility and everything beneath it for hundreds of feet. Maybe more? There's math to do, but I think it's reasonable that the effects would reach deep underground.
On reflection this is more like a smaller version of Madara Uchiha's Shattered Heaven (when he pulls asteroids out of space to drop on an army).
Aside from a detection technique embedded in the sky like the Akatsuki, or constantly patrolling skywalking rock soldiers, is there any reason why we would be detected doing this?
Also, we could embed explosives in our payload, but our best explosives are seals and I don't know if remote detonation is available. Pressure-sensitive triggers would work, but I don't recall if we have those yet.
- Location
- London
- Pronouns
- He/Him/They/Them
Now there's a fuckin quest tag
Oh, fuck this. Let's break out the fluorine on these motherfuckers
- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
"You didn't know? No wonder you missed our wedding."
- Location
- Finland
Wiping out the entire facility from orbit is also not necessarily a great plan from the perspective of getting the scroll. Even if it is indestructible, who knows where it might end up after the strike - thrown in the ocean? Under tons of rubble? We don't even know if the scroll is anywhere near the place, jus that it probably once was and we have no other leads.
Gouketsu Assets
Depending on what deniable assets we can get... my advice is scrap the mission. Either tell Asuma to give the scroll to some other clan and have them infiltrate the facility, and we'll try to work with a different sealmaster and risk the multiverse ending because they weren't as good as Kagome or we didn't work as well with them, or else just go after a less geopolitically-problematic scroll.
- Hazou
- 2x Severe Consequence at time of mission, Tsunade says "stick to light-duty".
- Needed for Sealing side of dragon war most of the time.
- Kagome
- Needed for Sealing side of dragon war most of the time.
- Akane
- Good to go.
- Haru
- Good to go.
- Atomu
- Missing fingers, can't use jutsu.
- Missing a leg(?)
- Reo
- Somehow disabled, probably shouldn't be on high-lethality missions.
- Mai
- Refusing to use her fire-jutsu specialty due to trauma.
- Mari
- On a mission already. Might not come back in time.
- Kei/Snowflake
- On a mission already. Might not come back in time.
- Noburi
- On a mission already. Might not come back in time.
- Yuno
- On a mission already. Might not come back in time.
Depending on what deniable assets we can get... my advice is scrap the mission. Either tell Asuma to give the scroll to some other clan and have them infiltrate the facility, and we'll try to work with a different sealmaster and risk the multiverse ending because they weren't as good as Kagome or we didn't work as well with them, or else just go after a less geopolitically-problematic scroll.
- Location
- Yes.
*screaming in accidental treason*
You telling me they gonna take away Mr. Mittens!?
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Why don't we just wait till the Isan mission is over? Tbh I'm not sure Kagome could've learned summoning in time for the crisis anyways