- Location
- The state of Paranoia
I wonder if the dogs would be interested in ice? It may be refreshing to cool down with while sitting in the shade.
Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest
- Thread starter eaglejarl
- Start date
-
- Tags
- naruto rationalist romance armageddon is looking better and better damn you kishimoto explosions everywhere explosives solve everyone if in doubt surrender to the mercy of zabuza it seemed like a good idea at the time looks like a really bad case of being a jōnin my god. where does the lore end? precommitting is the winning plan screaming in kagome screw the rules i have explosives something bad might still happen sometimes you gotta sociopath stabby zabby subsection c of paragraph 9 should include we can weaponize this so hard
- Location
- United States
To paraphrase Xykon: Our seal shenanigans are real flashy, but they have one weakness: they're shackled to our lame chunin-level ass. 😅
- Location
- The Maple Syrup Mountains
I'd say it's half and half, on how well it'd work out compared to our ideals.
Making a permanent skytower set-up for our main base? Quite viable as long as we take appropriate precautions and make enough 5SB. Hosting a village up there, with civilians and crops and animals? Probably too costly to make work.
Owning land for a supply of ninja children? Anything worth owning is already owned and it's hard to claim land you don't even live on, but if we played our cards right we could make it work. Getting villages to listen to us? Easy. No way they'd brush off the flying ninjas with WMDs.
My general impression is that most aspects related to being a village would be difficult to impossible, making it more of a diplomatic fiction if we insisted on being called one, but most aspects related to power would be workable, because at the end of the day we had total aerial supremacy over everyone not wearing black and red, an elite jounin, and Elemental Mastery. You don't need to call yourself a village to walk up to Konoha and say 'the nice flying ninjas with nukes would like to discuss the finer points of geopolitics'.
Y'know, on the subject of "those shiny yellow rocks", it occurs to me that possibly the single most valuable trade good in all the planes might be bespoken garments and armor woven out of clan spider silk. It's literally "a pencil's thickness worth can stop a jumbo jet in mid-flight" levels of strong and the best weavers in the universe are available for custom orders.
- Location
- The Soviet Republic of Canuckistan
- Pronouns
- He/Him
We need to see if we can get medical jutsu out of our Summons. Tsunade is the most powerful person we can approach safely and she has all the power.
Wouldn't they just set us on fire as a countermeasure to silk armor?
Actual spider silk is pretty fire proof. Of course, if you're hit with an actual fire jutsu I'd think you'd just be roasted regardless.
We'll probably need to loop Mari in to figure out how to properly describe mammalian dimorphism, but bespoke and custom garments of the finest silk ever woven do seem to be an opportunity to finally achieve the goal of making Ami blush.
We should probably deal with that whole, "multiple murderously furious girlfriends" thing first, though.
Oh, and then there's the whole Snowflake debacle to work out. Honestly, I know you placental mammals got infected by a coenocybolic virus ages ago and ended up adopting it as your preferred method of reproduction, but it's not as if it attacked your brains. Why do you have to make everything so much more complicated than it needs to be?
We should probably deal with that whole, "multiple murderously furious girlfriends" thing first, though.
Oh, and then there's the whole Snowflake debacle to work out. Honestly, I know you placental mammals got infected by a coenocybolic virus ages ago and ended up adopting it as your preferred method of reproduction, but it's not as if it attacked your brains. Why do you have to make everything so much more complicated than it needs to be?
Last edited:
- Location
- Book Fort
- Pronouns
- They/Them
Medical jutsu adapted/hacked for a Summon's physiology may not be suited for humanoid sophonts. Please call 555-OWIE for more information.
- Location
- The Soviet Republic of Canuckistan
- Pronouns
- He/Him
There is no possible way that Tsunade has not extracted useful medical jutsu from the Slugs and either through personal TH, getting a Slug to do it for her, or simply punching the concept of a medical jutsu into the shape she wants it to be, made it useful for humans.
I don't think that it will be a straight one-to-one conversion but there will be some level of compatibility.
- Location
- Book Fort
- Pronouns
- They/Them
Good point... Especially since Cannai mentioned TH-er Dogs that could be convinced to retrofit their jutsu for human use (Atomu, namely). Makes sense that the Slugs would have the same (especially since the other Summoning Clans are all quietly terrified of the Slug Clan, iirc).
- Location
- Omniverse #1345
Yeah that would actually be useful as a pain reliever, especially considering they probably don't have a real amount of anything stronger than willow bark.
The contest found a strong pain reliever. Still, it wouldn't hurt to have more options.
- Location
- Book Fort
- Pronouns
- They/Them
IIRC, one of the things that were turned in during Asuma's Competition was MfD-Morphine. I remember Tsunade being upset that it had been a clan secret all these years and I remember quietly panicking at the thought of ninja morphine addicts due to mission-related injury.
Edit: ninja'd
Definitely worth seeing if we can sell ninja poppies to the Dogs in exchange for gold. I bet they don't do a lot of agriculture. There is probably a strong demand for painkillers
We'll want to be careful about the dosage and unknown interactions, like giving dogs chocolate.
- Location
- The Soviet Republic of Canuckistan
- Pronouns
- He/Him
QMs: have any of the Goketsu visited the Leaf Jutsu Library? I'm specifically wondering if Mari or Kagome have been there to see if they can find any jutsu they like, and if Atomu has visited to pick up any available jutsu which don't have handseals.
I assume Hazo!Pilot would have made a beeline for it as soon as it opened because it's a library but he might have been busy.
I assume Hazo!Pilot would have made a beeline for it as soon as it opened because it's a library but he might have been busy.
We know for a fact that she has. We know that she was behind Kakashi's successful eye transplantation.
Milk of the poppy.
OK? We fried Hazo's body to get at the Great Seal, and our team in Isan woulda died if all they did was stay asleep. You consider us "unambitious"?
We're also still nowhere near the talent level of the Sannins.
- Location
- The Void
- Pronouns
- She/Her
Doing your job is not ambitious. Ambitious is finding your own angle and exploiting it.
And of course we aren't as strong as the sannin are now. But we are as strong as they where when they started the path to becoming legendary
- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Doesn't that depend where you pin that point? Off the top of my head, you could pick anywhere from when they got Hiruzen as their instructor at the age of 12 to when they defeated Hanzō of the Salamander as experienced jōnin.