- Location
- Yes.
Sounds great!
Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest
- Thread starter eaglejarl
- Start date
-
- Tags
- naruto rationalist romance armageddon is looking better and better damn you kishimoto explosions everywhere explosives solve everyone if in doubt surrender to the mercy of zabuza it seemed like a good idea at the time looks like a really bad case of being a jōnin my god. where does the lore end? precommitting is the winning plan screaming in kagome screw the rules i have explosives something bad might still happen sometimes you gotta sociopath stabby zabby subsection c of paragraph 9 should include we can weaponize this so hard
- Location
- Europa, Jupiter Orbit
[X] Action Plan: Shins and Spynetworks
Given all of that, it seems like a smart and relatively risk free endeavor to me to try and manipulate Hazou into letting us use Hana as a tool to convince him to do something that the hivemind wants him to do. Especially if there isn't really anything to lose compared to not trying this.
Well, currently Hazou doesn't want to invite Ren despite our plans for him. So I don't expect a talk to Hana to make that much worse. And while most of us players surely agree with you when it comes to our estimation of Hana's judgement, the same is not true for our player character. Hazou still puts quite a bit of weight into his mother's opinion.
Given all of that, it seems like a smart and relatively risk free endeavor to me to try and manipulate Hazou into letting us use Hana as a tool to convince him to do something that the hivemind wants him to do. Especially if there isn't really anything to lose compared to not trying this.
Emstar
The Shining One
- Location
- Trapped in an extradimensional rift.
- Pronouns
- She/They
Yeah pretty much.
We will naturally check the idea with Noburi (and maybe Keiko) and the resident Keiko experts.
Yeah, see how easy it is? Theres a nice consultation right there.
My model of smart yet lazy and aloof teenagers is that it will take Shikamaru approximately 1.4 years worth of consultations to figure out that all he needs to do is to be respectful and observant of her feelings, preferences, and comfort zones, and that pretty much anything we say is going to basically be this but applied to a specific scenario.
Hours, man.
E: On second thought, Ami did say something about "Hell hath no fury like a woman dunked in ice cold water. And Ima fuck you up if you keep interfering in people's relationships." so it might be a good idea to just be Switzerland there
Last edited:
Cariyaga
Handsome Gentleperson
- Location
- United States
Personally I think a policy of caution where Keiko is concerned is warranted. That is to say: If you or anyone else thinks she might take something poorly, just like... ask. Like a normal person. "Hey Keiko do you mind if I help Shikamaru not do stuff like that again?"
Okay I was going to go somewhere with that, but my model of that conversation actually goes like this:
"Hey Keiko do you mind if I help Shikamaru not ignore your agency?"
Keiko gives a flat stare that says, 'If you are capable of recognizing it in others, Hazou, then perhaps you should try directing that social awareness inwards?'
TaliesinSkye
Occasional Editor
- Location
- Northeast Ohio, United States
I was wondering the same thing. Some initial thoughts:
"I think Leaf and Mist really need to work together to find Akatsuki, do you think you could pull that off?"
"Marry me and help me uplift the world."
"Optimize my uplift plans on an ongoing basis, and suggest your own when you have ideas. I'll send my plans to you as I have them and data as I get it in from the plans that are enacted."
Cariyaga
Handsome Gentleperson
- Location
- United States
I suspect that all three of those are outside the bounds of a favor and also will probably get Hazou killed, killboxed, or Keikoed.
- Location
- Pacific standard
If nothing else I really want Hazuo to spend some time perfecting a "for my favor.... marry me?" Set of IN expressions. If we do it right Ami should be shocked, a little disappointed, and if we throw enough lust in the expressions hopefully disgusted.
Then we say "JK find me a telescope"
Then we say "JK find me a telescope"
Wiadi
Uncompromising Radical Leftist
- Location
- Something Clever
- Pronouns
- She/Her
So I haven't seen anyone commenting on this line so maybe I'm just forgetting relevant explanatory context but uh...
...what the fuck?
...what the fuck?
I dunno. After the Battle of the Munchkins she's either going to adore or murder him. Probably both.
- Location
- Europe
Probably a reference to their ancestors, Mist people believe their ancestor spirits are deep in the ocean or something like that.
- Location
- Italy
We just need to do both.
Like, not talking to her aside from respectfull gestures the whole time, then talking on purpose with Hana when she asks us a question.
Create a character with her backstory in the game and creating this subplot where she, for example, met her long exiled son that ask her "why".
Then BAM at the end of the night we reveal it we would like to talk to her, in the future, if she is so inclined,making her understand that it was party a trick to show Leaf and Mist divided, when there is, instead, hope of reconciliation..... Maybe.
In short, under the table "i'm very disappointed in you" stuff
But we should probably ask Jiraya for something like that.
Oh, and
[X] Action Plan: Shins and Spynetworks
Last edited:
Noumero
Omit Needless Words
Minor wordcount-optimization; 281 words.
- Sanity-check the plan with Keiko, Noburi, Jiraiya.
- Ask:
- Keiko: Shikamaru clearly offended her. Would she mind us charging him in hours/favors for consultations on future ideas involving her?
- Make it a joint Hazou/Noburi effort and cut her in?
- Noburi: Are his sisters coming?
- Jiraiya: Kagome mentioned an Akatsuki-related book. Rings any bells?
- Keiko: Shikamaru clearly offended her. Would she mind us charging him in hours/favors for consultations on future ideas involving her?
- Morning:
- Shop!
- Network:
- Approach merchants, craftsmen, book collectors. Look for performers/musicians around taverns.
- Collectors: discreetly ask about rare books (specifically, the Akatsuki book; it's possibly banned, or doesn't mention Akatsuki by name).
- Present a "joint business venture with our clan" to draft them into our Intel Network.
- Offer writs of patronage, price guarantees, partial financial backing, etc.
- Direct interested parties to the Gouketsu compound in Leaf, preferably within the next two months.
- Guidelines:
- Prioritize those we've approached previously: glassblowers, salt/spice merchants, brewers, others.
- Work out a bad/good cop negotiation routine with Noburi and Keiko (if she wants). Use it on new/wary targets.
- Goal: 24 merchants, 3-4 bards, 1-2 performing troupes.
- Approach merchants, craftsmen, book collectors. Look for performers/musicians around taverns.
- Lunch with Shin.
- Guidelines:
- Observe OPSEC, stay alert, avoid hard commitments.
- Be confident. Shin isn't a jounin.
- He is a silver-tongued viper. Keep your cool. Respond to taunts/manipulations with dry amusement.
- Start the interaction amicably.
- Minor flexing: casually name-drop Ami for the regulars' menu. Mention your promotion, ask about his.
- Elaborate on your offer/intentions:
- Cooperation was our motto all exam. We're here to build bridges.
- We're offering an enormous boost to his career, and a distant opportunity to convince us that the Kurosawa Clan is halfway decent.
- (As a callback, order a bottle of Kurohige's Revenge and two glasses (shallow pours, save the rest).)
- Invite him to games night.
- Guidelines:
Suggestions:
- Note the part marked in red: I'm not sure about it. Are we suggesting to, instead of allowing Shikamaru to make decisions about Keiko unilaterally, force him to consult Hazou before making decisions on her behalf — all done still without informing her of anything? Sub-bullet_point suggests "cutting Keiko in", but why not just make him do it to begin with?
- Do we want to chastise Shikamaru? Surely Ami already did an acceptable job.
- Do we want to extract favours from him? Surely we can come up with a better idea.
- Games night:
- Put in a line about starting to brainstorm for it now, with Noburi and Keiko's help (and some advice from Jiraiya). Figure out how to organize and run it, prepare contingencies for de-escalating potential conflicts, develop ways to make it more interesting/challenging for other munchkins (switch between several inconsistent rulesets, give them opportunities to play multiple games/characters simultaneously, make victory technically impossible without cheating...), etc.
- Ask Jiraiya about inviting all Kages (including Ren), as well as Zabuza. Can we get the latter's autograph?
- Should we invite the Oyabun?
Yep, I also noticed that. Was she talking about the pre-apocalypse civilization? Was this something to do with Hidden Depths? Or did they kill God and dump Its body into the ocean? Very interesting.
Last edited:
- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Fixed, thanks.
Cariyaga
Handsome Gentleperson
- Location
- United States
You know, it could just be idiomatic. Mist natives probably say that the same way us landlubbers say "dead and buried".
- Location
- Europe
This isn't a terrible idea. But, look they are made for each other:
That's so cute!
Also we already tried the whole Akane thing, it just hurt her. Poor girl. Hazou needs someone like Ami so they can challenge each other.
With Keiko and Ami having reconnected we can also pursue her without worrying about hurting Keiko! Now it will just piss her off, which is a major improvement.
Besides do people think Ami can resist the Nominal Head of the "10 year old Goketsu Keiko" Fan Club? She loves chaos and all the club has done so far is sending her presents, meaning we can confuse Keiko with love and affection and Ami can help us.
@MMKII , Maybe add:
Game Night:
- (secretly) Inform Ami: Fan club
Wait. We are going to play games with friend Hiashi.
Oh this is going to be so great.
- Pronouns
- They/Them
- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
This. Hazō knows it as a basic element of Mist culture. Having been brought up as an ordinary Mist child, he'd certainly consider ancestor worship the default form of religion, and indeed occasionally swears by the ancestors (in the emphatic sense, not the oath sense). Of course, for him it's more complicated because his ancestors are the Kurosawa. Plus he committed the ultimate sin by turning missing-nin, so it's in his best interests for what he's been taught about the afterlife to be wrong.
Hiashi is your friend. Hiashi wants you to enjoy the game night. Enjoyment is mandatory. Failure to enjoy is treason. Treason is punished with summary execution.
Cariyaga
Handsome Gentleperson
- Location
- United States
snicker
IF ONLY HE KNEW! IF only he knew about how ancestors basically interloped that started the Kurosawa clan!
Emstar
The Shining One
- Location
- Trapped in an extradimensional rift.
- Pronouns
- She/They
I have to say this particular bit of Kurosawa hypocrisy really makes me laugh.
Plan edits incoming modulo caffeine acquisition. Suffice to say Noumero brings up a good point and Cari echoes my new thoughts on the Shikamaru thing.
Edits:
Last edited:
- Location
- Europe
Pretty sure he knows that the Kurosawa are hypocrites because he knows about the Sharingan.
Also the Kurosawa were apparently a ninja clan before they stole a bloodline, wonder whats that all about:
I am pretty sure that they had the Iron Nerve for as long as they remembered. So no, for all Hazō know, the Kurosawa were a bunch of Uchiha deserters.
Emstar
The Shining One
- Location
- Trapped in an extradimensional rift.
- Pronouns
- She/They
Last edited:
- Location
- Kiev, Ukraine