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Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest

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faflec said:
I'm going to state for the record that "absorbed too much chakra" means "a god damn mother fucking ton of chakra". Canonically, Nagato's Preta Path was able to completely drain Naruto of his Sage Mode without any adverse effects, and it was only through constantly generating more SM chakra that Naruto was able to stone-ify the Path. Before then, the Preta Path was able to absorb SM-enhanced ninjutsu like Senpō: Goemon, Chōōdama Rasengan, Katon: Dai Endan, and Fūton: Rasenshuriken. Without issue.
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Nagato also had Uzumaki level chakra reserves and the bullshittiest of eyes, which basically allow you to control your chakra at will. I don't think he's a good baseline to compare to when we're talking about what a low-Chunnin can absorb. AND HOLY SHIT WAKAHISA DON'T HAVE ANY CHAKRA STORAGE WHICH MEANS THAT ALL OF THEIR CHAKRA IN THE MOMENT WOULD BE NATURE CHAKRA AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

A little more serious, how exactly does Vampiric Dew work? Like, is it used as a conduit for their water? i.e. it goes through them to the water or does it instantly go from the drainee to the water?

I'm also *slightly* concerned @eaglejarl rated my post insightful, but that might be just to get us to freak out
 
Threnodist said:
Nagato also had Uzumaki level chakra reserves and the bullshittiest of eyes, which basically allow you to control your chakra at will. I don't think he's a good baseline to compare to when we're talking about what a low-Chunnin can absorb. AND HOLY SHIT WAKAHISA DON'T HAVE ANY CHAKRA STORAGE WHICH MEANS THAT ALL OF THEIR CHAKRA IN THE MOMENT WOULD BE NATURE CHAKRA AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

A little more serious, how exactly does Vampiric Dew work? Like, is it used as a conduit for their water? i.e. it goes through them to the water or does it instantly go from the drainee to the water?

I'm also *slightly* concerned @eaglejarl rated my post insightful, but that might be just to get us to freak out
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He also rated mine insightful.

It is also almost certainly to get us to freak out.
 
Cariyaga said:
He also rated mine insightful.

It is also almost certainly to get us to freak out.
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The subset of "ratings on ideas intended to freak us out" and "ratings on ideas that are true" are not necessarily exclusive; it is entirely possible that Jiraiya, as literally the only Summoner among the Kage, would be the only one to recognize the threat to Ren's Wakahisa and then, as he really doesn't have training in statecraft, run out and commit multiple blunders on his way to try and prevent Wakahisa from getting statued.
 
Inferno Vulpix said:
And this is why I'm hoping we'll get some kind of in-story statement on the matter once we get back to Konoha, like Kagome going nuts about everyone's mysteriously missing disguise kits. It sounds all fine and good to just erase Henge and never mention it again until you realize that to the average lurker (and to future readers) it looks like an inexplicable massive plothole if not addressed.
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My head-canon is that Kagome is the only person who noticed the change, and everybody just ignores him when he tries to tell them, because Kagome.

In fact, it's now my head-canon that this explains all his theories. He's basically been maintaining a continuous stream of consciousness through all of the authors' drafts watching as the universe and its history twist around him. Sealing is basically just a way for characters to hack into "The Outline" and make some edits.
 
Lailoken said:
My head-canon is that Kagome is the only person who noticed the change, and everybody just ignores him when he tries to tell them, because Kagome.

In fact, it's now my head-canon that this explains all his theories. He's basically been maintaining a continuous stream of consciousness through all of the authors' drafts watching as the universe and its history twist around him. Sealing is basically just a way for characters to hack into "The Outline" and make some edits.
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I wonder what level of sealing you need to edit a chapter.
 
faflec said:
My "Funny" rating is actually a "Screaming in Kagome" rating.
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"Informative" is rarely used. We could collectively decide that it's meaning is now "Screaming in Kagome."

The cool thing is, this makes it doubly appropriate in most contexts (QM posts or analysis posts about our various weapons).
 
Tua said:
I am not sure it is wise to encourage them to find out who can out-evil the other. This will only end badly for Hazo and everyone he holds dear.
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I disagree. The events has long since spiraled out of our control. Speaking metaphorically, the sealing failure has already happened, and our only choices are to try to escape to be torn asunder, and to dance into the epicenter of it to catch a glimpse of Out. One option is clearly more entertaining that the other.

And it is too late, anyway. Both I and @Roomba already made our taunts to @Velorien. ...You could still close your eyes, I suppose.
 
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QTesseract said:
To Elaborate on this, its Canon (or wog canon, at least) that even with all the rinnegan bullshit, including the deva path *and* the resurrection abilities, in Pain's home territory, Jiraiya was still basically guaranteed the win if he had known about there being 6 bodies ahead of time. There's a reason it was beleivable for Itachi Motherfucking Uchiha and his S rank partner Kisame to flee despite Jiraiya having someone to protect. From the Kyubi attack to his death, Jiraiya has an uninterrupted reign as the strongest ninja in the world, and by a fairly wide margin for most of it as well.
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IIRC, however, Jiraiya's near-soloing of Pain was mostly possible due to an AoE Sage Mode sonic genjutsu combo with the toad sages. If Pain's bodies had been wearing earplugs, or had some other hard counter to that one technique, I doubt Jiraiya would have had such an easy time of it.

Briefvoice said:
Prediction:

  • Next post eaglejarl triumphantly unveils how the PC is completely, logically, screwed.
  • A half dozen posters come up with logical flaws at to why this makes no sense.
  • Cue another retcon.
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I'd like you to know that this comes across as passive-aggressive and pointlessly hostile. You are, unprompted, presenting an expectation of an adversarial player-QM relationship, pre-emptively accusing a QM of malice, carelessness and/or stupidity, and casually invoking an experience that has invariably been difficult and painful for QMs and players both.

You have issues with how the game is being run. We get it. But posts that boil down to "Hey, I bet the QMs are going to screw up again" are not a mature way to express that dissatisfaction.

Noumero said:
@Velorien, I struggle to remember the last time you did anything remotely as evil as what @eaglejarl was doing lately. It's all cute girls having introspective moments from you, the tunnel-adventure aside.

I'm concerned EagleJarl is well on his way to dethroning you. Are you going to just let it happen?
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I notice I am confused. Are you saying that the Akane breakup and its aftermath were insufficiently evil? If so, I'll see what I can do.
 
Velorien said:
I'd like you to know that this comes across as passive-aggressive and pointlessly hostile. You are, unprompted, presenting an expectation of an adversarial player-QM relationship, pre-emptively accusing a QM of malice, carelessness and/or stupidity, and casually invoking an experience that has invariably been difficult and painful for QMs and players both.

You have issues with how the game is being run. We get it. But posts that boil down to "Hey, I bet the QMs are going to screw up again" are not a mature way to express that dissatisfaction.
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I can get that you might be a bit sensitive to these kinds of things (because let's be honest, the hivemind does NOT respond well when things don't go our way) but I think you're reading way too in to that comment. It was pretty clearly meant to be taken as a joke.
 
Threnodist said:
I can get that you might be a bit sensitive to these kinds of things (because let's be honest, the hivemind does NOT respond well when things don't go our way) but I think you're reading way too in to that comment. It was pretty clearly meant to be taken as a joke.
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Yes, an intensely passive-aggressive joke. It's the equivalent of QMs going "Oh, look, the players are once again about to make a bad decision and then whine about the consequences, isn't that funny".
 
Velorien said:
I notice I am confused. Are you saying that the Akane breakup and its aftermath were insufficiently evil? If so, I'll see what I can do.
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Well, yes. It was very well-done, but I found it more interesting and insightful than evil/horrifying. Maybe players more invested in romance were more affected, but it's not like anyone was killed, or driven insane, or twisted into a warped shell of their former self and subjected to eternal torment. And it's not like the players were so panicked they generated a hundred pages of discussion about it in a week.

I remember you saying something ominous about the Grue aftermath? I'm sure you could spin it into something beautifully terrifying.
 
Cariyaga said:
The whole "stick that knocks the natural chakra out of you" thing is pretty cool :p
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Is... is Jiraiya about to hit Keiko with a stick? Just, ya know, runs out of the woods, out of nowhere, and hits her with a stick?

Jiraiya: *dynamic entry*"Ourya!!!"
Keiko: "Ow! Wha...?"
Jiraiya: "Thank kami I was in time."
Hazō: "What the fuck, Jiraiya!"
Jiraiya: "Kids, I-"
Noburi: "Seriously! What the hell is wrong with you?"
Jiraiya: "But I-"
Keiko: "Guys, it's ok. I probably did something to deserve it."
Jiraiya: "No, you-"
Hazō: "Fuck that noise, Keiko. You're awesome. And you've done nothing to deserve being hit with some fucking stupid stick."
Jiraiya: "Can you just-"
Noburi: "Yeah. We just stomped the competition because of you. You don't have to take this shit."
Keiko: "I doubt Jiraiya hit me with a stick for no reason, though."
Jiraiya: "Yes. Thank y-"
Hazō: "No! There's no justification!"
Jiraiya: "SAGE'S BALLS, KIDS! I WAS SAVING HER LIFE! DO YOU WANT HER TO TURN TO STONE?"
Kato: "This is so surreal..."
Haga: "Can't wait till I have grandchildren, so I can tell them the story about the time the Hokage beat the legendary Gōketsu Keiko with a stick. I'm going to get so much mileage out of this one."
 
Enjou said:
Jiraiya: "SAGE'S BALLS, KIDS! I WAS SAVING HER LIFE! DO YOU WANT HER TO TURN TO STONE?"
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Just wait and see how hitting people randomly with a stick is going to be a Goketsu tradition:

"And that, kids, is how I met your mo our clan saved the world. Once you come of age, you too will get your own custom made Goketsu Stick of Saving People. Use it well, use it often and more importantly: use it without provocation and at random times."
 
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