I presume the scroll would still belong to Mist.
Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest
- Thread starter eaglejarl
- Start date
-
- Tags
- naruto rationalist romance armageddon is looking better and better damn you kishimoto explosions everywhere explosives solve everyone if in doubt surrender to the mercy of zabuza it seemed like a good idea at the time looks like a really bad case of being a jōnin my god. where does the lore end? precommitting is the winning plan screaming in kagome screw the rules i have explosives something bad might still happen sometimes you gotta sociopath stabby zabby subsection c of paragraph 9 should include we can weaponize this so hard open voting
I presume the scroll would still belong to Mist.
- Location
- USA
- Pronouns
- He/Him
No, not that! There are no vampires or werewolves in MfD that you know of and I refuse to introduce that much emo-ness.
- Location
- Europe
I bet one of the Wolf country ninja has a werewolf bloodline. Can't fool me mister GM sir.
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- Location
- uk
... is there bat country?
- Location
- Europe
... is there bat country?
No, but there might be some werebears in Bear!
Tua
鸡肉面条汤
- Location
- شوربة الدجاج المعكرونة
You'd still have to desensitize either summoning clan to Hazo. Maybe have Panda write a book that we can just hand to any new summon we meet. "Stupid Things my Summoner says: Surviving in an 'Optimized World'" does have a nice ring to it, doesn't it?
Disagree. We should work our butts off to get to the tournament stage now and then only do increasingly risky things during the one month break, culminating with the marriage proposal to Ami (maybe we should actually meet her first in-character though; Keiko can probably help here). Nothing bad will come from this.
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Jello_Raptor
(Confirmed Jelly)
- Location
- Left of Center
Note: @eaglejarl is a literal genie!
He is just trying to trip and confuse us. Do not give in! @eaglejarl clearly meant "There are (no vampires) or (werewolves in MfD)" rather than the naive reading of those words.
This means there are only two options:
- There are no vampires in the real world, therefore there must be werewolves in MfD! EJ can't introduce further emo-ness because it has already happened!
- There are no werewolves in MfD, and this is a cry for help that EJ hopes will escape the sight of the vampire cabal that enforces the masquerade!
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- Location
- uk
or != xor; both causes could be true. But it could be that there are no vampires, no werewolves in mfd, but there are vampires in mfd and there are werewolves in real life.
- Location
- Under a Rock
I think you've gotten your logic wrong here. At a minimum, this isn't an XOR, so there should be three cases.
There are (no vampires) or (werewolves in MfD). At most one of those statements is false.
!(No Vampires) and (werewolves in MfD). Vampires exist in the real world, and werewolves exist in Mfd.
(No Vampires) and !(werewolves in MfD). Vampires do not exist in the real world, and werewolves do not exist in MfD.
(No Vampires) and (werewolves in MfD). Vampires do not exist in the real world, and werewolves exist in MfD.
Your case 2 is actually the only case forbidden by the "or" statement you constructed.
/logical nit picking
Edit: Shinobi'd
- Location
- The Void
- Pronouns
- She/Her
Oh I know this one. YES
Noumero
Omit Needless Words
You're reading it wrong too. I think he meant that "(There are no vampires) or ((werewolves in MfD and I) refuse to introduce that much emo-ness)".
That is to say, "it is true that EITHER there are no vampires OR both MfD!werewolves & EagleJarl refuse to introduce 'that much' emo-ness". If we assume that @eaglejarl believes that there are no vampires in the real world, then the first part is true, which means the entire either-or statement is true, regardless of the truth value of the second half.
What a nifty trick, @eaglejarl.
The goal presumably is to acquire more personal power for Team Uplift so that they can protect themselves and achieve their goals against hostile ninja.
There are ways to achieve this, and it's not immediately clear that acquiring a scroll would pay off for us for a given amount of risk.
Jello_Raptor
(Confirmed Jelly)
- Location
- Left of Center
*sigh*
The single most common error I make when programming these days is using 'not x' instead of 'x' and vice versa.
The 'xor'/'or' conflation was intentional, since the colloquial usage of 'or' is equivalent to 'xor' and that is very much not how @eaglejarl uses it.
- Location
- Phoenix, AZ
Summoning scrolls are currently
1) the best long range communication methods available
2) access into unique foreign trade opportunities
3) access to unique jutsu
4) significant combat buffs
While it is probably true that #4 alone isn't worth it, especially as Keiko has a high number of available summons such that we normally won't have the CP to summon them all, the first three are worth it in their own right, and I'd argue that having a second summoner on the team is better than only having one. Especially as my understanding is that as chunnin, we'll be taking more solo missions.
- Location
- The Void
- Pronouns
- She/Her
Nope. Though that is a good perk of finding a summon scroll. The real reason is that it grants Team Uplift more prestige. Once we get all 3 we are officially the second coming of The Sannin. It also opens up potential new trade markets for economic development.
Also you are preemptively deciding that the risk are to much even though we have done no research into. Taking one day in game to look into the possibilities is totally reasonable
Well, we'll see when opportunities for scrolls come up.
- Location
- The Void
- Pronouns
- She/Her
That's the problem, waiting won't get it for us. We have to go out and make it happen ourselves
I feel like there are questions to ask about Summoning Scrolls that haven't really been dug into yet.
Who made them, anyway? Was it just one genius who made contract scrolls for all the tribes, or did a lot of sealmasters independently create them? The former seems much more likely to me than the latter, given what an incredibly esoteric branch of sealing it would be and how much specialized knowledge would be required. We know the summon tribes themselves had nothing to do with it, since they don't do sealing. (Don't they- maybe they don't all feel like the pangolins about it?)
But if it was a unique genius, then why did she make scrolls for all of the summon tribes? Some kind of act of altruism? If we trust Kagome, the Sage and the Dummy don't do sealing so it wasn't them.
EDIT: Just as a stage one, it would be interesting to lay the pangolin contract and the toad contract out next to each other and see if they were penned by the same sealmaster. Given how much individuality there is in sealing styles, it ought to be easy to tell.
Who made them, anyway? Was it just one genius who made contract scrolls for all the tribes, or did a lot of sealmasters independently create them? The former seems much more likely to me than the latter, given what an incredibly esoteric branch of sealing it would be and how much specialized knowledge would be required. We know the summon tribes themselves had nothing to do with it, since they don't do sealing. (Don't they- maybe they don't all feel like the pangolins about it?)
But if it was a unique genius, then why did she make scrolls for all of the summon tribes? Some kind of act of altruism? If we trust Kagome, the Sage and the Dummy don't do sealing so it wasn't them.
EDIT: Just as a stage one, it would be interesting to lay the pangolin contract and the toad contract out next to each other and see if they were penned by the same sealmaster. Given how much individuality there is in sealing styles, it ought to be easy to tell.
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Emstar
The Shining One
- Location
- Trapped in an extradimensional rift.
- Pronouns
- She/They
Im on bord with spending effort to locate appropriate Summoning Contracts for Hazou and Nobs.
We should probably try to suss out a few good choices for clans and then see if they have open/lost contracts or if their summoner is someone we can plausibly assassinate.( Doing it the other way around gets us whats convenient, not necessarily the best matchup)
We should probably try to suss out a few good choices for clans and then see if they have open/lost contracts or if their summoner is someone we can plausibly assassinate.( Doing it the other way around gets us whats convenient, not necessarily the best matchup)
- Location
- Snakesden
FWIW, I like Akane/Hazō a lot and my visceral experience of the breakup was still really positive. it felt very meaningful/growth-y for Akane as a character...and I hope it will be for Hazō once he realizes what it was.
(Also, what the hell, my autocorrect now maps Hazou to Hazō??)
- Location
- Under a Rock
We should definitely specialize what we are getting from the other summon scrolls, should we acquire them. Keiko has combat sewn up very well, and given that all our chakra is fungible, it doesn't make a lot of sense to have the others get an excessive number of combat summons.
So we should focus on one of the following:
- Teachers
- Rare Jutsu
- knowledge of engineering, science, and history.
- Experts
- Someone who knows all about controlling chakra beasts
- Medical research partner for Noburi
- Lawyer
- Social
- Someone we can summon to represent us in various deals.
- It is quite possible this summon will be extremely chakra cheap. Civilians can be great at negotiating.
- Expert in politics.
- Artist. I just like the idea of alien artwork lining the halls of the Goketsu compound.
- Someone we can summon to represent us in various deals.
- Economic
- Merchants
- Sailors
- Utility
- Mechanic
- Someone who can get/make weird and complicated objects on short notice.
- Sensors. A bat with long range echolocation would be sweet.
Seems like it's totally possible for us to acquire those from just the Pangolins.
I think it's better to focus on summons with different body plans and sensory capabilities like bats and sharks.
Chapter 199: OPSEC Breach
- Location
- USA
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Chapter 199: OPSEC Breach
Jiraiya had gone three blocks before his thoughts unfroze and he managed to quash the voices that whispered pain and shame and failure in his mind. He was at the apex of his leap across one of Mist's wider avenues, hanging in balance between sky and earth for a silent moment until gravity reasserted its inevitable grip and pulled him down again. In that perfect moment, his thoughts balanced themselves as well and old instincts yielded to newer logic.
Noburi wasn't the only Wakahisa on the field. And it wasn't just the Wakahisa, it was also Aburame and possibly others. Shit, shit, shit. Four decades of perfectly-maintained OPSEC and it was all going to go up in fucking flames. Worse, it could destabilize the entire continent—once the other Kage knew a piece of it, their intelligence services would go into full swing to track down the rest, and they wouldn't care too much about who got in the way; arms races were like that.
Perhaps he should simply let the exam play out without his interference...? After all, probably nothing would happen. A had been smarter than he knew to turn down the bet; none of them truly understood the power of a Summoner, especially when you backed it up with Noburi's effectively infinite chakra reserves and Hazō's insaneish-yet-effective planning; the kids were going to run roughshod over the opposition, probably taking them out before the poor fools even knew what hit them and certainly before they had a chance to fight back with something as off the wall as chakra drain.
Even if, for some bizarre reason, the kids didn't completely curbstomp all of the opposition, what were the chances that one of the non-curbstomped people would be a chakra drainer? Jiraiya didn't have an exact list of names and abilities for all the remaining contestants, but there couldn't be more than a handful of chakra drainers still in the Exams...maybe three or four Wakahisa, max? Add Aburame, of course—and wouldn't that be a nightmare? Imagine the reaction of his clan if he ended up dead from fighting Jiraiya's daughter? The absolute best that would result would be Jiraiya losing the hat, but a clan war was far more likely. Plus, there could easily be a few more who were vulnerable...chakra drain was rare, but there were so many wackadoo bloodlines, jutsu, and seals out there, who could know what any random ninja was actually capable of?
No. He wasn't Jiraiya the Spy anymore; he couldn't cover this one up, kill anyone who knew, and then vanish into the night. He was Jiraiya the Hokage now, and Leaf had to come first. Whatever risk there was of the other Kage learning this secret and whatever might happen afterwards, the Elemental Nations would be destabilized if anyone died fighting the pangolins, and it would all be on Leaf. The other Kage would, quite reasonably based on what they knew, interpret it as a ninjutsu by the pangolins, a deliberate attack. He would need to come clean.
FUCK.
o-o-o-o
When Jiraiya walked back into the room, his movements were not quite right. His stride was slightly different, the way he turned and closed the door behind himself just a hair off. Few aside from the Kurosawa would have noticed, but to Ren the truth was like a scream: This was not Jiraiya.
"Are you all right, Jiraiya?" Ren asked, the hairs on the back of her neck tingling.
"I am Jiraiya's clone," he said, offering them all a shallow bow. "He is currently on his way to the proctor station at the East Gate. As soon as he realized that your students were also at risk, he sent me back to notify you of the danger. If any of your students are capable of draining chakra, it is absolutely imperative that you order them not to drain the pangolins. Draining chakra from a summon is incredibly dangerous and will probably kill the person who attempts it."
Ōnoki snorted. "That sounds like a desperate ploy to me. He makes high-stakes bets with all of us about whether or not his kids will win the event, then suddenly there's a reason why no one should attempt to go after his daughter's pangolins?"
The clone shrugged. "You're welcome to stab them, punch them, use jutsu on them, or blow them up...just do not drain their chakra. I recognize how this sounds, but it honestly didn't occur to him until Lady Ren mentioned both chakra drain and pangolins together. Summoners are rare. The ability to drain chakra is also rare. Summons are expensive, so they get called only in dire situations; most Summoners are powerful enough to rarely find themselves in dire situations. Given all that, it's hardly surprising that there are no known cases of anyone draining chakra from a summoned creature."
"And just what is this danger?" A demanded.
The person who was not Jiraiya, nor actually a person, folded its hands behind its back and looked at the Raikage calmly. "May I suggest, sir, that we adjourn to the East Gate? Jiraiya is moving farther away from us by the moment, and there is a limit to how far he can be from me before I pop. Beyond that, you need to notify your students of the danger."
The four Kage exchanged looks.
"If this is a game...." A began.
"Jiraiya gives you his oath that it is n—"
The clone vanished.
The pause was very brief; no one becomes a Kage without both decisiveness and speed. All four of them were out the door before the smoke from the clone's cessation had finished dispersing.
o-o-o-o
Gamazō touched down with a thump that shook the earth and Jiraiya leapt off the massive toad's back. 'Zō wasn't as big as Gamahiro or some of the others, but he was big enough to be intimidating and that was all to the good right now. Chances were that the proctors weren't going to be happy about taking orders from a foreigner, even if he was the Hokage and—
A burst of memories hit and he sighed in relief. His Shadow Clone had given the others just enough to tantalize before dispelling itself; they should be on their way. Still, no reason to wait.
"Who's in charge?" he snapped.
"Me, sir," said a ninja with the characteristic Kurosawa chin. "How may I help, Lord Hokage?"
"My kids are in danger, as is any other contestant with the ability to drain chakra. That includes, at a minimum, Gōketsu Noburi, Aburame Shino, and any Wakahisa. I'm sending toads to warn them. You lot are going with those toads to verify that nothing is being said that constitutes an influence on the event. Clear?" Jiraiya's tone indicated that this was not a request.
"Sir, your children were through here about twenty minutes ago," Kurosawa said carefully. "They were fine. They turned in their documents, got their marker, and went back out."
"Good," Jiraiya said. He sliced his finger on a kunai and slapped it to the ground. "Toad Summoning Technique: Gamasid! Gamaichi! Gamaotokonoko! Gamarei! Gamabāsuto! Gamatama! Kōsuke!"
The field around them disappeared behind a wall of smoke; it dispersed, revealing a bunch of toads ranging from the size of a thumb to the size of a large dog.
"Gentlemen," Jiraiya said. "There are about seventy ninja in the woods behind you. One of them is my daughter, Keiko, the Pangolin Summoner—"
"Woo, Bossman gettin' busy again!" laughed one of the larger toads. Its voice reminded Geki of a dockworker: uncouth and harsh. The fact that a toad was speaking at all was bizarre enough to distract from the tone. The fact that it was directly in his brain just made it worse. "One of youse babymamas finally tie you down, Bossman?"
"Shut up, Gamaotokonoko," Jiraiya said. "This is serious. There's an unknown number of ninja in there with Keiko who are capable of chakra drain, and she's got a shitton of pangolins on the field right now. We need to warn them."
"Huh?" Gamaotokonoko said. "What's da problem, Bossman?"
One of the other toads slapped Gamaotokonoko upside the head.
"Nature chakra ain't good for humans, numbnuts," the slapping toad said. He turned back to Jiraiya. "You sure this is an issue, Bossman? I dunno if we're made of nature chakra on this Path."
Another toad, this one smaller, kicked the second toad in the knee. "OPSEC, maggot-eater! Don't go flapping you ugly fat lips about dat!"
"Listen, you little pisspond, I'll—"
"Enough," Jiraiya said sharply. "Cat's out of the bag on that one, Gamarei. Still, good policy." He turned back to the dockworker-voiced toad. "I don't know if you are or aren't made of nature chakra, Gamabāsuto. Neither does anyone, as far as I know. Still, you might be and I can't afford to take the chance. Now, you're all going to pair up with one of these proctors and then head out. This is the Chūnin Exams and it's politically important that we not disrupt them in any way. Maintain OPSEC but otherwise do as your proctor says."
He turned to the proctors. "Gentlemen, I assume you know who all the chakra drainers are, yes?"
"Uh...we...we aren't supposed to share information on capabilities, Lord Hokage." Kurosawa Whatisface was obviously several steps past nervous, but he still answered gamely enough.
Jiraiya shot the younger man a look that could have melted steel. "Your people may fucking die if you don't give them the message, you jackass." He rubbed his face as though trying to drive out the exasperation. "Never mind. Just tell everyone, regardless of if they can drain chakra. And fast! Go, go, go!"
Kurosawa looked even more uncomfortable. "Lord Hokage, we, uh, we aren't supposed to leave the proctor station unless summoned by a contestant."
The ground shook as A touched down. "I believe we should take Jiraiya's word on this, proctor," said the Raikage. "It is not to his benefit to lie."
Kurosawa was starting to sweat as he looked back and forth between the two men, both physically more massive than himself and both capable of eradicating him with a pinky.
"Sirs...I'm sorry, but without an order from the Mizukage—"
The other three Kage touched down from their leaps, That Woman a few moments behind the other two.
"Whatever Jiraiya told you to do, do it," Ren said. She turned to Jiraiya. "What's going on?"
"Ma'am, he's sending us out with a message for the contestants," Kurosawa said.
"About draining the pangolins possibly being fatal," Ren said, glancing at her clansman. "Yes, I know. Go. The medic-nin and four of the rest stay, everyone else get out there and pass the word." She turned back to Jiraiya. "An explanation, if you please?"
Jiraiya looked disgruntled and waved the other four Kage off to one side, out of earshot of those few proctors who weren't in the process of scrambling off into the woods. The seven smaller toads went with them.
"How about me, Jiraiya?" Gamazō asked, his mind-voice so deep that the only possible descriptor was 'subterranean'. "Would you prefer that I stay here with you or go with the others?"
"Go, please, 'Zō," Jiraiya said gratefully. "Just be careful with your hops. Don't land on anyone and try not to trash the landscape too much."
The massive toad sniffed in disdain and leaped off in an enormous bound that almost caught him up with the proctors.
Jiraiya turned back to the other Kage. "The Seventh Path is rich in nature chakra, an energy that's similar to but distinct from what we know as chakra. Everything that lives there is soaked in it. The problem is that it's not good for humans. Getting it in your system can change you or kill you, quickly. Nature chakra exists here on the Human Path as well, and I honestly don't know if summoned creatures are made of regular chakra, nature chakra, or what. Draining them might do nothing, but it could also kill you."
"Why didn't you mention this before?" A demanded. "Our children were battling for two solid days during the swamp event, and more during the escort mission."
"It just didn't occur to me," Jiraiya admitted. "It's like my clone told you—it's literally unheard of for a Summoner to fight a chakra drainer and pull out summons. This situation is unprecedented—Keiko is a chūnin-level Summoner, meaning that the pangolins are her primary toolbox, not her ace in the hole. She's facing off against dozens of enemies at her own level in a situation that is explicitly intended to reward aggression, and she's desperate because her team is so far behind. They're going to be stomping all over those woods, crushing everyone."
"I think they might be surprised when they meet Hazama," A said dryly.
"Want to bet?" Jiraiya asked, leaning into the snideness that felt so right for this discussion. It would be lovely if he could distract the others onto less secret topics. "I've still got that lumber contract with your name on it. Sealmaster, Summoner, nigh-infinite chakra...your kids are fucked."
The expression dropped off of A's face; he straightened, looming imposingly. Jiraiya snorted; it was adorable when people thought that they could intimidate him just because they were taller than he was. Granted, after all the chakra-boosted running, substituting, and summoning—especially Gamazō—his chakra reserves had taken a heavy hit. This wasn't the best time to be dancing with another Kage. Still, it wouldn't come to that, because—
"Gentlemen," said Ren, "tensions are running a bit high. There's nothing further that we can do here, so perhaps we should adjourn for the evening? Some dinner and sleep would be good for all of us, and we could start again in the morning, refreshed."
A's mouth worked as though he'd tasted something sour, but after a moment he nodded and stepped back. "Wise words. Very well."
"Excellent. Let's meet back at the conference room at nine for breakfast, at which time Jiraiya can tell us more about the risks of this 'nature chakra'." That Woman smiled one of those utterly infuriating smiles at him and then gestured invitingly back to the city.
Jiraiya muffled a sigh and instead nodded politely. "An excellent idea. Thank you."
XP AWARD: 0
There will be no voting.
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Emstar
The Shining One
- Location
- Trapped in an extradimensional rift.
- Pronouns
- She/They
Bats would be an interesting fit.
Kisame has the shark contract. We should get something water based though: Im thinking crocodiles or penguins or something. Ideally something that can travel on land as well as the ocean but if we have to go pure water that would also be fine (and if we go that route, octopuss or jellyfish would be ideal. Gotta hold them for the drain.)