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Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest

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I thought Jashin was supposed to be on our side, given all the firstborns we've pledged him?
 
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So, for anyone reluctant to post for lack of anything meaningful to contribute, you can always follow our QMs' example and settle for some old memes and bad jokes.
 
Roomba said:
So, for anyone reluctant to post for lack of anything meaningful to contribute, you can always follow our QMs' example and settle for some old memes and bad jokes.
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Bad jokes? The only bad joke is one that doesn't make someone laugh! Even if it's yourself. :p

With the exception of jokes at others' expense.
 
Ample Accelerate said:
Ftfy is a meme. It's most likely a joke.
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The formulation is a meme, but for purposes of communication it's more concise than "I think your statement is 100% correct except for this one point". Though, honestly, the point of the thing was more that it is canon that has it happen for poorly-contrived reasons, rather than merely fanfic. I mean, come on, "Naruto is the monster that destroyed the village"? You'd think Leaf didn't have a tradition of jinchūriki dating back to its foundation, or that all the previous jinchūriki hadn't been well-loved despite containing the Nine-Tails, or that the village hadn't been saved by Naruto becoming a jinchūriki. And even if you assume that every last adult in the village has had their brain turned off by bitterness over the loss of their loved ones, that still doesn't address the other layer of poorly-contrived reasons, namely Naruto's parentage being kept secret. If somebody can give me a good reason for the latter, factoring in the fact that Naruto's identity as a jinchūriki is already known to thousands or tens of thousands, then I will eat the Hokage's hat. Yes, even if I have to go star in my own CfG in order to do it.

(And all of that is without touching on why the Hokage never stepped in and stopped people from bullying his village-destroying superweapon.)

Roomba said:
So, for anyone reluctant to post for lack of anything meaningful to contribute, you can always follow our QMs' example and settle for some old memes and bad jokes.
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Sir, you wound me to the very depths of my heart! (Top shelf, third jar from the left.)
 
Velorien said:
The formulation is a meme, but for purposes of communication it's more concise than "I think your statement is 100% correct except for this one point". Though, honestly, the point of the thing was more that it is canon that has it happen for poorly-contrived reasons, rather than merely fanfic. I mean, come on, "Naruto is the monster that destroyed the village"? You'd think Leaf didn't have a tradition of jinchūriki dating back to its foundation, or that all the previous jinchūriki hadn't been well-loved despite containing the Nine-Tails, or that the village hadn't been saved by Naruto becoming a jinchūriki. And even if you assume that every last adult in the village has had their brain turned off by bitterness over the loss of their loved ones, that still doesn't address the other layer of poorly-contrived reasons, namely Naruto's parentage being kept secret. If somebody can give me a good reason for the latter, factoring in the fact that Naruto's identity as a jinchūriki is already known to thousands or tens of thousands, then I will eat the Hokage's hat. Yes, even if I have to go star in my own CfG in order to do it.
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Hm...

Does "toad prophecy" count? :p I mean, that's kind of cheating, tbh, but, while I never read the manga myself, I don't think we're ever told the exact details of it?

On the note of said prophecy, something interesting to note:
The Children of the Prophecy (予言の子達, Yogen no Ko-tachi) is a title for two people who were foretold to hold the fate of the world in their hands. These two, due to being the reincarnations of Hagoromo Ōtsutsuki's sons Indra and Asura Ōtsutsuki

[...]

The Child of the Prophecy (予言の子, Yogen no Ko) is a title conceived by the Great Toad Sage. He foretold that the Child of the Prophecy would be a student of Jiraiya that would bring a great revolution to the world of the ninja. Jiraiya's actions would determine if this revolution would be for the world's salvation or the world's destruction.
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Notably, these two are the progenitors of the Uchiha and Senju clans. Hazou is, incidentally, a (former) member of the Kurosawa clan, cousins to the Uchiha clan. He is also a student of Jiraiya, and if our plans for the future are anything to judge it by (glances at Radvic), he certainly holds the fate of the world in his hand.

Food for thought.
 
I strongly doubt the QM's willingness to give us Indra's Chakra. It'd be a considerable buff which we've done basically nothing to earn or even sought out in the first place.
 
Cariyaga said:
Hm...

Does "toad prophecy" count? :p I mean, that's kind of cheating, tbh, but, while I never read the manga myself, I don't think we're ever told the exact details of it?
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Based on what we know of the prophecy and the actions of those who knew it (notably Jiraiya), it doesn't seem like something which could be positively fulfilled by Naruto's parentage being kept secret. Nagato and Minato's certainly weren't.

Aabcehmu said:
I strongly doubt the QM's willingness to give us Indra's Chakra. It'd be a considerable buff which we've done basically nothing to earn or even sought out in the first place.
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We'd be happy to consider it as long as you remember the old adage: "If you give Frodo Indra's chakra, you also have to give Sauron Kaguya."
 
Velorien said:
If somebody can give me a good reason for the latter, factoring in the fact that Naruto's identity as a jinchūriki is already known to thousands or tens of thousands, then I will eat the Hokage's hat. Yes, even if I have to go star in my own CfG in order to do it.
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Danzo wanted Naruto to grow up without any friends so he'd be easier to control?
 
Cariyaga said:
Considering they are, supposedly, still alive and go by "Sage" and "Dummy", I'd doubt it too. :p
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Indra and Asura are the Sage's children who fucked everything up by starting to fight over their inheritance.

In MfD they supposedly made seals....we really have to investigate this.

Velorien said:
I mean, come on, "Naruto is the monster that destroyed the village"? You'd think Leaf didn't have a tradition of jinchūriki dating back to its foundation, or that all the previous jinchūriki hadn't been well-loved despite containing the Nine-Tails, or that the village hadn't been saved by Naruto becoming a jinchūriki.
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If I had to guess the real reason for the whole inconsistency of Naruto's childhood is that Kishimoto hadn't decided yet to make Naruto the son of the Fourth or if he is the reincarnation of the nine tails, in the pilot Naruto chapter (Naruto Manga Pilot) Naruto was an actual demon in human form. So people thinking that he is the actual nine-tails makes sense at that point, that jinjuuriki are only container was probably decided later on.
 
Cariyaga said:
Hm...

Does "toad prophecy" count? :p I mean, that's kind of cheating, tbh, but, while I never read the manga myself, I don't think we're ever told the exact details of it?
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How many people in the village would have known of the prophecy? Also, note that the Child of Prophecy was required to be Jiraiya's student. I'm not sure Jiraiya even *met* Naruto until after his graduation.
 
Velorien said:
We'd be happy to consider it as long as you remember the old adage: "If you give Frodo Indra's chakra, you also have to give Sauron Kaguya."
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I would personally be interested in this, except that EJ hates when stories have a god as their final villain.

coughwormcough

Also, what would it even mean for Hazou to be a reincarnation of Indra? Would we need someone to RP Indra in the thread? Would it just be a vague "your chakra smells Indra-y"?

In MfD, Sealing was created by the sage's sons, so I could totally see Indra as "enthusiastically spews crazy ideas everywhere" guy, while Ashura is grumbling in the background, telling his excitable brother to fill out a goddamn Risk Analysis form before trying anything that just came out of his mouth.
 
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MadScientist said:
In MfD, Sealing was created by the sage's sons, so I could totally see Indra as "enthusiastically spews crazy ideas everywhere" guy
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Well, in that case we have the Indra RP covered. Bring on the Chosen One powerups for Hazou, I say. Kaguya doesn't sound that scary, how hard could it really be to blow up the moon before some idiot wakes her up?
 
It suddenly occurs to me that we may have already fulfilled the prophecy.

"The reincarnations of Indra and Ashura, taught by Jiraiya, will bring a revolution to the world. It's up to Jiraiya whether that revolution is one of destruction or salvation."

We've already brought a revolution to the world by creating skywalkers. The first thing we did was give them to Jiraiya, who in turn used them to equip Leaf in the battle of the gods, in which Naruto was captured by Akatsuki (plausibly bringing destruction upon the world).

Umm... Oops?
 
MadScientist said:
It suddenly occurs to me that we may have already fulfilled the prophecy.

"The reincarnations of Indra and Ashura, taught by Jiraiya, will bring a revolution to the world. It's up to Jiraiya whether that revolution is one of destruction or salvation."

We've already brought a revolution to the world by creating skywalkers. The first thing we did was give them to Jiraiya, who in turn used them to equip Leaf in the battle of the gods, in which Naruto was captured by Akatsuki (plausibly bringing destruction upon the world).

Umm... Oops?
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Man, Jiraiya must've been pissed once he realized that was the way the prophecy was working out.
 
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