- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Actually, I was thinking of Kyōraku's Bankai. Fullbringers are a whole new level of why Sage why?
Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest
- Thread starter eaglejarl
- Start date
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- Tags
- naruto rationalist romance armageddon is looking better and better damn you kishimoto explosions everywhere explosives solve everyone if in doubt surrender to the mercy of zabuza it seemed like a good idea at the time looks like a really bad case of being a jōnin my god. where does the lore end? precommitting is the winning plan screaming in kagome screw the rules i have explosives something bad might still happen sometimes you gotta sociopath stabby zabby subsection c of paragraph 9 should include we can weaponize this so hard
TaliesinSkye
Occasional Editor
- Location
- Northeast Ohio, United States
I don't think that's really sufficient as an explanation. Many (perhaps most) of them seem to think of themselves as good people who help protect others, including the boss. That sort of self image isn't really compatible with supporting their very own version of Josef Mengele. Maybe it'd be workable as canon if the horrors the guy got up to were something he somehow kept secret from his superior and everyone else, but that clearly isn't the case. Everybody knows and they never say a word about being bothered by it, much less do anything about it. It's a huge plot hole. Once you paint a guy as a villain because he does that stuff you can't have him become an ally and have everyone just ignore what he gets up to.
He should have been executed the moment people found out.
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- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Citation needed. Not that I disagree with you that the whole thing is an act of massive hypocrisy (he turns his own squad into suicide bombers), but the shinigami see themselves as protectors loosely at best. As a society, they don't display any interest in non-shinigami beyond the demands of their job (kill the Hollows, modify memories as necessary). I think it's telling that the amount of time a shinigami spends outside the Court of Pure Souls is inversely proportional to their power level. Above all, they let Rukongai be Rukongai, despite being immortal, wealthy, and godlike from the perspective of the general population.
- Location
- Europe
Becoming a Hollow doesn't sound that bad, better being a murder hobo ghost than afterlife poverty.
- Location
- NY
Be cautious upon whom you call, for He may answer.
This statement obviously excludes the non-zero probability of Velorien actually being the Sage.
- Location
- Why would this be required?
You're choices are either be poor in a weirdly japanese afterlife, or be forced to commit cannibalism in a constant struggle for survival which will likely involve killing your loved ones as you go insane in the beginning....or Hell.
It's a lose/lose either way really.
- Location
- Why would this be required?
Not to even mention everything around squad zero, the origins of the soul king, and how the very first captains of the shinigami were described as protectors in name only, being genocidal thugs at best.
- Location
- florida
You don't have to eat people if you make it to ghost Mexico.
Interlude: Honoka's Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day
- Location
- USA
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Interlude: Honoka's Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day
"No, that's wrong."
Honoka frowned. "But sensei said—"
"I don't care what your freak of a tutor said! In this room, I am your sensei and what I say is right! Six demerits! Get up here!"
Honoka pushed herself to her feet, struggling not to cry as she walked to the front of the room where Teacher-Stinker was already taking the switch out of the desk. Without being told, she turned to face the class and held out her hands at chest level, palms up and fingers together with her thumbs carefully pushed down as much as possible.
"Why are you being punished?!"
That was a tough one, actually. She was pretty sure that 'because you were wrong and I said so' was not what Teacher-Stinker was looking for.
"Um—"
"Because you disrespected me! Students must respect their sensei! Say it!"
"Yes, sensei. I am being punished because I disrespected you. Students must respect their sensei."
The switch came down with all the force of an adult ninja's arm.
o-o-o-o
"There she is."
"What a weirdo." / "Thinks she knows more than the teacher; talk about stuck-up." / "So ill-mannered." / "What do you expect from a mudfoot?"
Honoka bit her lip and tried not to sniffle as she collected her food. She most definitely did not allow herself to turn and look at who was whispering. It was probably some combination of the usual suspects—Hyūga and her sycophants. Some of the words didn't bother her—she did think she knew more than Teacher-Stinker, at least in a few places. Kagome-sensei was a way better teacher than Stinker, Poopyhead, or any of the rest. Well, except maybe for Umino-sensei. Umino-sensei knew what she was talking about.
Being called a mudfoot, though...that hurt. Yes, her parents were civilians, but Honoka was a ninja, darn it! She earned her spot in the Academy, and she was already a better ninja than a lot of the whisperers! She could operate storage seals, and set off puffers—usually in her hand, but still. Could Hyūga operate a storage seal?
Well, actually, yes. She probably could. Cheating Hyūga stinkers with their cheating stinking bloodline cheating.
Still.
The whispers followed her as she made her way to an empty table and sat down to eat. It was hard; the welt on her palms made it painful to close her hands, much less use something that required as much fine motor control as chopsticks.
"Oh look, it's the mudfoot. Hi, mudfoot."
Honoka said nothing and kept her eyes on her food, hoping they would go away.
"Look, she can't even eat properly! I guess you can't really expect a softfoot to be able to teach basic manners to its spawn."
Honoka's head came up, eyes blazing, and she started to push herself to her feet...and then winced as the pressure of her palms on the table sent a lance of eye-watering pain through her.
"Oh, look, she's going to cry," said Nakamura with a grin.
"Be nice, Nakamura," Saito scolded. "She's doing her best. You can't expect a mudfoot to have any sort of self-discipline."
She wanted to scream at them, 'I am not a mudfoot!', but she didn't. After all, she was. A ninja with civilian parents was, by definition, a mudfoot. Even if she learned water-walking right this second and never again had to touch mud, she would still be a mudfoot. After all, a civilian-born ninja would never have the same level of skills as a clan ninja, right? Everyone knew that.
The tears began to flow despite her best efforts, and so she jumped to her feet and ran for the bathroom, pushing her way past the other girls. The worst part was that it just proved them right; she had never seen a clan child crying in public.
o-o-o-o
Kagome frowned. The flood of children exiting the school gates had slowed, trickled, and then stopped, and he was still un-glomped. He gave it another five count, then strode to the central building, idly noting that his blastrings had somehow appeared on his hands.
Long habit had his head on a swivel, checking through the windows of the various classrooms as he moved down the central hall towards the main office. Empty. Empty. Empty. Empty.
Not empty.
He jolted to a halt and stepped closer to get a better look. There were six children inside, heads down, industriously writing in their notebooks. Honoka was in the third row, second chair from the right. A thirty-ish brunette dressed in grey sat behind the desk at the front of the room doing her own work.
He frowned. School hours were over and Honoka hadn't said anything about extra tutoring. What in the name of every sealing failure was she still doing here? More importantly, did he dare interrupt?
He thought for a moment, then shrugged. They weren't researching seals, jutsu, or medical techniques, and they weren't practicing trapmaking or ordinance disposal. It shouldn't matter if they were distracted for a moment. He tapped carefully on the window.
The teacher's head came up in surprise. She said something to the class and then came out into the hall, closing the door quietly behind herself.
"May I help you?"
"What is that?"
One eyebrow went up. "Detention, of course."
Kagome frowned. "Why is Honoka in detention?"
The teacher thought for a second, then nodded as the name connected. "Yamamoto, yes. She disrespected Takahashi-sensei in his history class today. He awarded her six demerits and she already had four this week. Then, during lunch she attacked one of the other girls, earning her five more."
What.
Start with the simple part and work forward toward the impossible part. "Four? Is that a lot?"
The teacher laughed, and then realized that he was serious. "Excuse me, sir...who are you?"
"Never you m...." He paused. It was okay to say it now, right? The name was supposed to have respect. "Gōketsu Kagome. I'm her tutor."
"Oh! Mr. Gōketsu, it's an honor, sir!" She bowed deeply. "Please excuse me, for not recognizing you; I had not expected to meet one of Lord Hokage's family at detention and you aren't wearing your crest."
"Why would I wear the crest? It's a big target on your center of mass. Well, the one on your back. The one on your front is right over your heart. Stupid design either way."
The teacher blinked in shock. "Stu...uh." She stopped and visibly forced herself to change gears. "Is there anything I could help you with, sir?"
"What's this about demerits? Is four a lot?"
She almost visibly started to say 'oh, that's right, you weren't born here' and then swallowed the words. "Yes sir, that's a lot for only Tuesday. At five demerits the student must stay in detention. At ten they receive a stroke of the switch. Earning thirty in one month means a flogging."
The world stuttered and Kagome suddenly found himself with his left hand around the teacher's throat, pinning her against the wall. His right hand was pressing the blastring against her forehead with his thumb in firing position.
"Sir, please, stop!" the teacher cried, face pale as she scrabbled at his arm. A tiny fragment of his mind noted that she lacked the musculature and coordination that you would expect from a combat ninja. "Please, I'm just the detention monitor!"
He forced himself to breathe, then slowly let her go and stepped back. "Explain how she earned them. Quickly."
The woman pressed herself even farther back into the wall, rubbing her neck unconsciously. "Sir, please, I didn't award any of the demerits. I'm not a teacher here, I'm a civilian auxiliary. I just monitor detention and verify the children's lines afterwards."
He had a feeling that he would feel guilty about this later, but right now the world was firing angles and threat assessments. "Explain."
"I would need to check the logs for details, sir. I only get the summary. I believe the first ten were for classroom behavior—usually that means being disruptive or disrespectful. And then the last five were for fighting."
"Honoka did not attack anyone."
"Sir, I'm sorry, please. I don't know anything about this. I'm a civilian, just a detention monitor. Please don't kill me, sir."
He forced himself to breathe and the world slowly became more than a combat problem. With it came the guilt; she was a civilian, he was a ninja, and he had nearly killed her. He was no better than Yoshirō or his friends, picking on someone weaker than himself.
"I'm sorry," he said, blushing and looking down. "For threatening you. I shouldn't have done that."
"It's all right, sir. No harm done. Totally fine. I deserved it for being so rude."
"It's not fine. I need to make it up to you—what can I do?"
The woman's expression was a complicated thing. Kagome had trouble reading it, but there was definitely some fear in there. The rest was...surprise? Maybe? Faces were hard!
"Uh...thank you, sir? It's not necessary, really. I shouldn't have been so difficult. Really, it's all my fault. I humbly apologize." She bowed, repeatedly and deeply.
This conversation was getting more surreal by the moment.
"When will she be done?" he asked, choosing to focus on a practical problem and leave the squishy people stuff for later.
The woman cringed. "It's supposed to be four hours, sir. If you would like to take her now...?"
He thought about that for a moment. "Would you get in trouble if I did?"
"Um...."
"Then I'll wait. And I really am sorry." He bowed deeply and held the door open for her. Once she had gone inside (looking as though her world had somehow turned itself upside down) he closed it quietly and shuffled down the hall a few steps, sitting down crosslegged and pulling some sealing supplies out of his pouch. He could wait to get his explanations.
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- Location
- Under a Rock
The hell?! That could break bones!
Sage damn it. This system is messed up.
We have our own tiny Kagome! In addition to the full sized Kagome! This is wonderful.
Its important to get your daily recommended dosage of glomping. Also, uh-oh. Blastrings.
Uh-oh.
Sage dammit. This system is messed up.
It is people like the instructor. Who realize they can get away with hurting people weaker than they are, and all the powerless start to learn that no matter what a ninja does to you, you need to apologize to them.
And today, it was Kagome keeping the system going. Kagome, who in a better world would be the kindest of souls, has been warped and broken by a world of firing angles and threat assessments. Thank the sage his trigger discipline held.
Also, I'm glad that the instructor wasn't there. Killing him would not be a good idea. (At least in the open...)
Anyway, Doomed Instructor hit Honoka for disrespecting him. Doomed Instructor cannot be allowed near children, and more relevantly for Doomed Instructor, has hit the wrong Uncle's protege. Doomed Instructor then forged an account of her getting into a fight, and pretended that he hit her as part of *hurk* proper disciplinary procedure. His deception should provide an opening.
As Neji has been on his best behavior, I believe there is vacant post at the oubliettes on the southern border. If everyone involved is very, very lucky, Kagome will settle for that.
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- Location
- USA
- Pronouns
- He/Him
If by 'proper' you mean "in full concordance with all regulations and peer expectations" then he did hit her as part of proper disciplinary procedure. In front of the entire class, including the UsualSuspects.
- Location
- Under a Rock
Ah, I was miscounting. For some reason I thought that the fight brought her total to 10. Instead the 6 brought her total to 10, and the 5 brought her to 15.
This isn't good. If Honoka hits 30, there will be dead bodies. Our best option is to find some way Doomed Instructor has violated the terms of the system. That way when we remove him from the school, no one can act against us.
"We are the Gouketsu, you will leave because we said so" is still on the table, and I will vote for it if I don't have an alternative, but it is expensive. And it exposes a soft target to the Hyuuga.
Cariyaga
Handsome Gentleperson
- Location
- United States
@eaglejarl @Velorien @OliWhail From Hazou's experiences being taught by Ebisu, was he a competent teacher by Kagome's standards, or more of the trash he saw back in Mist and Honoka saw here?
- Location
- Yes.
- Location
- Under a Rock
We've been explicitly told as much. I'm hoping that 6 demerits for back talk and full force swings are considered outrageous. Otherwise our only options involve finding unrelated dirt or enjoying the benefits of being the military dictator.
If we don't have time to burn down and rebuild the whole education system, a quick and dirty fix would be
- Ban corporal punishment because seriously, what the hell.
- And create a parent council with some amount of power, elected by parental vote. Perhaps the council could fully or partially determine teacher bonuses? Doomed instructor was able to hit Honoka because he knew that civilian parents and a six year old couldn't do anything about it. You know the clan kids aren't getting 6 demerits for back talking.
- Location
- USA
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Ebisu is extremely competent. Bizarre, but competent. Kagome has not interacted with him in Hazō's presence and you have no idea what the two men think of each other, if anything.
- Location
- USA
I dunno, like, it is a ninja-ocracy, right? Like, how sure are we that it is illegal for ninjas to hit grown ups? I may be mixing our pangolin allies up with our fire nation allies.
