[X] Action Plan: Simple Rewards
Ask Jiraiya for technique hacking training. Keep all our past contingencies.

Ya know, to move the plot along and stuff. Just ask for one scene (the rewards scene).
*waves hands frantically*

But but! Why TH?? And we have contingencies for discussing with J what rewards are reasonable, so what do we do with those, since we're supposed to follow past contingencies? And previous contingencies were really light on opsec, so we should be more careful about those!
 
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Maybe we should ask Mari for opsec training because at this rate we might as well just ask Shikamaru if we can borrow his family's printing press so we can give a copy of our diary to everyone in Leaf.
 
*waves hands frantically*

But but! Why TH?? And we have contingencies for discussing with J what rewards are reasonable, so what do we do with those, since we're supposed to follow past contingencies? And previous contingencies were really light on opsec, so we should be more careful about those!
It seems like there wasn't consensus on a method of extracting our mother which would actually work, so I see little point in bringing that up to Jiraiya. Knowing how Technique Hacking works will be a not-insubstantial boost to our knowledge of how the world works, and may open up interesting opportunities depending on how easy/hard it is to change or create jutsu. I'd prefer Technique Hacking to asking for another earth jutsu. I recognize that there is disagreement on what to ask for from Jiraiya. It'd probably be worth there being competing plans for it. I also like that the way the voting landscape is now, for any plan to pass, it needs to pass the hurdle of "several people have voted for Lore Updates."

Edit: and yeah, there should be a better plan proposed. Mine only makes sense if you don't think too hard about it.
 
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...Did we accidentally happen upon Leaf's enclave of pacifists? Is Kakashi actually a pacifist too????

This probably isn't random. It's probably someone's influence, be it Asuma, Gai, Jiraiya, Danzo, or some other party.

We might become S-rank tier long before we would risk a mission to rescue Hana. By then, we might be able to take on Mist and win.

Also, it's a good assumption that Hana will be watched more and more as we gain international fame.

The more famous we get the deader she gets. At a certain point it makes no sense for them to keep her alive because the risk outweighs the benefit of a jounin. It might be worth trying to get some general percentage risks of her dying. We could find out average lifetime of a ninja who crossed yagura in some minor way (Mari probably has okay information on this) to figure out a hard time based deadline independent of our actions, which as stated before decreases with fame.
 
Bah, and here I was hoping to write Hazō's desperate attempts to make it clear that he didn't mean to imply anything by his parting shot to Akane, except for the stuff he was implying, which, no, it wasn't meant to be a statement that he like liked her, but that is not to say he doesn't not like like her, and obviously he was just trying to express his deep affection for her as a friend and as her master without in any way denying other possibilities which may or may not be appropriate in the future and Akane why are you beating your head against the wall?
q
[X] Plan Velorien
-[X] Hazō's desperate attempts to make it clear that he didn't mean to imply anything by his parting shot to Akane,
--[X] except for the stuff he was implying,
---[X] which, no, it wasn't meant to be a statement that he like liked her,
----[X] but that is not to say he doesn't not like like her,
--[X] and obviously he was just trying to express his deep affection for her as a friend and as her master
---[X] without in any way denying other possibilities which may or may not be appropriate in the future.
--[Q] (Damn, I am to romance what Rock Lee is to stealth.)
-[X] Akane why are you beating your head against the wall?
--[Q] (I know exactly why, just not how to fix it or stop it.)
 
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[X] Hazō's desperate attempts to make it clear that he didn't mean to imply anything by his parting shot to Akane,
-[X] except for the stuff he was implying,
--[X] which, no, it wasn't meant to be a statement that he like liked her,
---[X] but that is not to say he doesn't not like like her,
-[X] and obviously he was just trying to express his deep affection for her as a friend and as her master
--[X] without in any way denying other possibilities which may or may not be appropriate in the future.
-[Q] (Damn, I am to romance what Rock Lee is to stealth.)
[X] Akane why are you beating your head against the wall?
Why can I not rate this "like" twice?
 
Asking, "So what's Tenten like?" should be enough to get her started. We can ask Akane about her as well, see what kind of intel we can dig up there, so that we have cause to ask after meeting her to talk sealing.

e:

Oh, also, re: Kabuto, we should be able to frame the asking to learn techniques from him well. [snip]

Yeah, that sounds reasonable.

I agree that in general we should frame our suggestions to appeal to people. I think it's a little trickier with Kabuto, since he'll no doubt see through what we say (at least if it counts as rolling Deception). But he'll probably appreciate us emphasizing we wanted to learn from him as flattery, rather than taking umbrage because we tried to fool him.
 
Meta post

One of the things I like the most about this quest is that when you cut away all the pretensions and ostentation it still provides the reader with the very same formula of memes, slice of life segments and a generous helping of trolling /shitposting that make the online experience of reading a story so special.
It is the kind of fic that often makes a spectacle of being dismayed and snobish about the competition and takes such pride in placarding the high quality content. But there are always hints of incredulity and suspicion regarding the sincerity of the action. Like a possible willful disprepancy between intention and execution.

This story is a bit like a restaurant that makes fun of your mothers sausage rolls, turns around and then, instead of serving you a rack of lamb or a perfect beef wellington presents you with a plate of "assemblage de saucisson en croûte". All the while managing to keep such a straight face you simple can't decide if they are sincere or merely fucking with you. And that is absolutely hilarious.

Let us take our quest masters for example. At first glance they are your typical young liberals with your few mandatory dashes of regurgitated sjwisms and few tiny pinches of EUPHORIA glimpsing through a fairly polite and even mannered persona.

They are the guys who take offence even indirect rape jokes and who have publicly bemoaned the results of the American elections.
Then they turn around and give us a gift like Rock Lee. The guy who likes to make people unconfortable using a aggressivly advertised faux (?) homosexuality and sexualized language. The guy who is dropping homo entendre after homo entendre and cares for nothing but his own enjoyment at his targets expense and discomfort.

They gave us a guy who would tell a thirteen year old child to climb unto his tower of manliness so that they may engage in wild and sweatbreaking endeavour until the flame of his youth bursts forth and warms Hazou's insides with the viscous contentment of accomplishment.

They gave us a guy who, despite said minor repeatedly voicing and showing his distress and disgust with his antics simply ignores the wishes of his targets and despite his negative reaction to and explicit plea to cut it out continues regardless, or even (a)roused by the protests. The fact his target is, in our case, a child barely entering puberty makes the contrast stand even more out. Finally, the notion that Rock Lee's behaviour could actually be unintentional, merely natural for him, and that this described behaviour, is just the way some (possibly) gay people express themselves, seals the deal on the characters hilarity. He has become mfds very own Ped(r)o Barboza.

The worst, most damaging gay stereotypes played straight for laughs fits perfectly in the above mentioned scenario. What do they really believe? What is the narrative behing the narrative? Are their occasional comments lapses of jugdement or drama bait or a accentuation due to juxtaposition? (In this case: We condemn rape jokes... look at our funny rapey character) I like that after all this time and reading almost 500k words of content I still haven't quite figured out how they tick. I don't plan on doing it either.


TLDR:
To our quest overlords: I can't figure out if you are awesome by design and intention or by happenstance but dont change and continue the way you are! You keep this thing, fresh despite and engaging despite the crippling lack of agency a narrative about being tiny lights in a very big and cold world often necessitates.
Keep on rockin and thank you!
 
[X] Plan Velorien
-[X] Hazō's desperate attempts to make it clear that he didn't mean to imply anything by his parting shot to Akane,
--[X] except for the stuff he was implying,
---[X] which, no, it wasn't meant to be a statement that he like liked her,
----[X] but that is not to say he doesn't not like like her,
--[X] and obviously he was just trying to express his deep affection for her as a friend and as her master
---[X] without in any way denying other possibilities which may or may not be appropriate in the future.
--[Q] (Damn, I am to romance what Rock Lee is to stealth.)
-[X] Akane why are you beating your head against the wall?
--[Q] (I know exactly why, just not how to fix it or stop it.)
You joke, but
[X] Plan Velorien
Is something I would love to read.
 
Meta post

One of the things I like the most about this quest is that when you cut away all the pretensions and ostentation it still provides the reader with the very same formula of memes, slice of life segments and a generous helping of trolling /shitposting that make the online experience of reading a story so special.
It is the kind of fic that often makes a spectacle of being dismayed and snobish about the competition and takes such pride in placarding the high quality content. But there are always hints of incredulity and suspicion regarding the sincerity of the action. Like a possible willful disprepancy between intention and execution.

This story is a bit like a restaurant that makes fun of your mothers sausage rolls, turns around and then, instead of serving you a rack of lamb or a perfect beef wellington presents you with a plate of "assemblage de saucisson en croûte". All the while managing to keep such a straight face you simple can't decide if they are sincere or merely fucking with you. And that is absolutely hilarious.

Let us take our quest masters for example. At first glance they are your typical young liberals with your few mandatory dashes of regurgitated sjwisms and few tiny pinches of EUPHORIA glimpsing through a fairly polite and even mannered persona.

They are the guys who take offence even indirect rape jokes and who have publicly bemoaned the results of the American elections.
Then they turn around and give us a gift like Rock Lee. The guy who likes to make people unconfortable using a aggressivly advertised faux (?) homosexuality and sexualized language. The guy who is dropping homo entendre after homo entendre and cares for nothing but his own enjoyment at his targets expense and discomfort.

They gave us a guy who would tell a thirteen year old child to climb unto his tower of manliness so that they may engage in wild and sweatbreaking endeavour until the flame of his youth bursts forth and warms Hazou's insides with the viscous contentment of accomplishment.

They gave us a guy who, despite said minor repeatedly voicing and showing his distress and disgust with his antics simply ignores the wishes of his targets and despite his negative reaction to and explicit plea to cut it out continues regardless, or even (a)roused by the protests. The fact his target is, in our case, a child barely entering puberty makes the contrast stand even more out. Finally, the notion that Rock Lee's behaviour could actually be unintentional, merely natural for him, and that this described behaviour, is just the way some (possibly) gay people express themselves, seals the deal on the characters hilarity. He has become mfds very own Ped(r)o Barboza.

The worst, most damaging gay stereotypes played straight for laughs fits perfectly in the above mentioned scenario. What do they really believe? What is the narrative behing the narrative? Are their occasional comments lapses of jugdement or drama bait or a accentuation due to juxtaposition? (In this case: We condemn rape jokes... look at our funny rapey character) I like that after all this time and reading almost 500k words of content I still haven't quite figured out how they tick. I don't plan on doing it either.


TLDR:
To our quest overlords: I can't figure out if you are awesome by design and intention or by happenstance but dont change and continue the way you are! You keep this thing, fresh despite and engaging despite the crippling lack of agency a narrative about being tiny lights in a very big and cold world often necessitates.
Keep on rockin and thank you!
Thank you for giving up your time to produce this valuable analysis of our writing. Were you not so forthright in expressing your views, I would surely not have thought to equate "makes frequent homoerotic innuendo" with "gay", nor "does not suppress said innuendo around a boy one year younger" with "malicious paedophile". Your superior imagination is a credit to you.

Of course, I will refrain from describing all that I have concluded upon reading your post. After all, my agenda is as mysterious and opaque as yours.
 
[X] Plan Velorien
-[X] Hazō's desperate attempts to make it clear that he didn't mean to imply anything by his parting shot to Akane,
--[X] except for the stuff he was implying,
---[X] which, no, it wasn't meant to be a statement that he like liked her,
----[X] but that is not to say he doesn't not like like her,
--[X] and obviously he was just trying to express his deep affection for her as a friend and as her master
---[X] without in any way denying other possibilities which may or may not be appropriate in the future.
--[Q] (Damn, I am to romance what Rock Lee is to stealth.)
-[X] Akane why are you beating your head against the wall?
--[Q] (I know exactly why, just not how to fix it or stop it.)

You joke, but
[X] Plan Velorien
Is something I would love to read.

Y'all... there are [jk] votes for a reason... pls... :cry:
 
Meta post

One of the things I like the most about this quest is that when you cut away all the pretensions and ostentation it still provides the reader with the very same formula of memes, slice of life segments and a generous helping of trolling /shitposting that make the online experience of reading a story so special.
It is the kind of fic that often makes a spectacle of being dismayed and snobish about the competition and takes such pride in placarding the high quality content. But there are always hints of incredulity and suspicion regarding the sincerity of the action. Like a possible willful disprepancy between intention and execution.

This story is a bit like a restaurant that makes fun of your mothers sausage rolls, turns around and then, instead of serving you a rack of lamb or a perfect beef wellington presents you with a plate of "assemblage de saucisson en croûte". All the while managing to keep such a straight face you simple can't decide if they are sincere or merely fucking with you. And that is absolutely hilarious.

Let us take our quest masters for example. At first glance they are your typical young liberals with your few mandatory dashes of regurgitated sjwisms and few tiny pinches of EUPHORIA glimpsing through a fairly polite and even mannered persona.

They are the guys who take offence even indirect rape jokes and who have publicly bemoaned the results of the American elections.
Then they turn around and give us a gift like Rock Lee. The guy who likes to make people unconfortable using a aggressivly advertised faux (?) homosexuality and sexualized language. The guy who is dropping homo entendre after homo entendre and cares for nothing but his own enjoyment at his targets expense and discomfort.

They gave us a guy who would tell a thirteen year old child to climb unto his tower of manliness so that they may engage in wild and sweatbreaking endeavour until the flame of his youth bursts forth and warms Hazou's insides with the viscous contentment of accomplishment.

They gave us a guy who, despite said minor repeatedly voicing and showing his distress and disgust with his antics simply ignores the wishes of his targets and despite his negative reaction to and explicit plea to cut it out continues regardless, or even (a)roused by the protests. The fact his target is, in our case, a child barely entering puberty makes the contrast stand even more out. Finally, the notion that Rock Lee's behaviour could actually be unintentional, merely natural for him, and that this described behaviour, is just the way some (possibly) gay people express themselves, seals the deal on the characters hilarity. He has become mfds very own Ped(r)o Barboza.

The worst, most damaging gay stereotypes played straight for laughs fits perfectly in the above mentioned scenario. What do they really believe? What is the narrative behing the narrative? Are their occasional comments lapses of jugdement or drama bait or a accentuation due to juxtaposition? (In this case: We condemn rape jokes... look at our funny rapey character) I like that after all this time and reading almost 500k words of content I still haven't quite figured out how they tick. I don't plan on doing it either.


TLDR:
To our quest overlords: I can't figure out if you are awesome by design and intention or by happenstance but dont change and continue the way you are! You keep this thing, fresh despite and engaging despite the crippling lack of agency a narrative about being tiny lights in a very big and cold world often necessitates.
Keep on rockin and thank you!

You know, I really need to salute you for this. I had to read it three times and look up the EUPHORIA reference before I was sure you were being insulting. I am honestly impressed -- no kidding, no snark -- at how you perfectly nailed the backhanded compliments and hidden insults. You'd be a great choice for casting as a catty Southern belle. ("Wow, you manage to make that hat look good!" or "I think you're beautiful.")

Anyway, sounds like you're dropping out. All the best to you, and I hope you find something else you like better.
 
The more famous we get the deader she gets. At a certain point it makes no sense for them to keep her alive because the risk outweighs the benefit of a jounin. It might be worth trying to get some general percentage risks of her dying. We could find out average lifetime of a ninja who crossed yagura in some minor way (Mari probably has okay information on this) to figure out a hard time based deadline independent of our actions, which as stated before decreases with fame.
Why would they deliberately cut any bonds a missing-nin still had? Especially when they could use her for leverage at that point. If anything they should try to play matchmaker and establish ties to the village so that she wouldn't want to leave.
 
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