Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest

Kiba · Jul 16, 2021

[X] Hazou Limps His Way Across Another Dimension

Lailoken · Jul 16, 2021

Eisenhelm said:
i had a thought
when the dog-pangolin war breaks out we will have casus belli to help the condors defect from their slavers, if things go extremely well they may even join the dog clan like the hornets joined the arachnids. not by coercion but by the promise of safety. of course i think the hornets joined because they lost the capability to produce a boss due to dragons but i am sure we can arrange for it to look like an accident.

The condors and the ravens seem as if they might have more in common...

Noumero · Jul 16, 2021

FaintlySorcerous said:
Maybe we should ask Shikamaru for some broad thoughts on how to run our clan.

Sasuke said:
"But," Uchiha said after a second's hesitation, "you talked to him. You offered him the chance to use his power for good. And you hurt him badly. I feel like I owe you one. I won't support your insane experiment, but if you ever want advice on how to run a proper Leaf clan, feel free to turn to the Uchiha."

Perhaps we should finally take him up on the offer?

Odgorian said:
I will be surprised if even @faflec remembers me

Hey, I remember you too!

_The_Bomb · Jul 16, 2021

Noumero said:
Perhaps we should finally take him up on the offer?

You know, I would actually sign off on that.

"Sasuke, you once told me that 'if I ever want advice on how to run a proper leaf clan, I should turn to the Uchihia.' You may have been joking, but I would sincerely appreciate some advice on the matter. We may have some minor ideological differences but there's no denying the Uchiha's long record of success. The Goketsu are a new clan and, without Jiraryia, don't have much institutional knowledge. There's a few things I'd like to hear your thoughts on, starting with how to properly delegate important tasks within the clan…."

RandomOTP · Jul 16, 2021

Shrooms said:
how do yall feel about this D E L E G A T I O N

[X] Hazou Limps His Way Across Another Dimension

Can you add Tenten to that list? Kei asked us about that, too, and I really, really don't want Tenten to die.

Shrooms · Jul 16, 2021

RandomOTP said:
[X] Hazou Limps His Way Across Another Dimension

Can you add Tenten to that list? Kei asked us about that, too, and I really, really don't want Tenten to die.

Done. I get the strangest feeling tenten and Kagome would get along really well lol

Paperclipped · Jul 16, 2021

Shrooms said:
[X] Hazou Limps His Way Across Another Dimension
Word Count: 298

Other (OFFSCREEN)

Commission chocolate sculpture of Kagome

Mari, investigate scarf guy

Reo, bring Hazou the Yakuza victims' information.

Kagome, arrange seal loadout for new Goketsu

Introduce Canun to Atomu, relay Cannai's comments about making techniques for Atomu. How can we compensate you?

Also, are there Dog Training Jutsu that improve skills like running or mental resilience? Are they willing to share with Hazou? Hazou's clan?

What would be fair service/payment?

Consult with Cannai later if necessary.

Cannai

Discuss how Ami's Crusader idea could be improved.

Pantsaa sent a Condor to verify DRAGONWAR is real. Enma will spread word once it's confirmed.

Leaf is experiencing famine. Can Hazou trade raw goods, medicines, other projects like the sleds for food or gold?

(Offscreen prep) Loop in Asuma, is he willing to approve jutsu trades?

Hazou plans to negotiate Crusader idea with Bears. Is there another Dog diplomat that could attend?

Private audience with Kumokogo

What Crusader plan changes would help Arachnids?

Pantsaa sent a Condor to verify DRAGONWAR is real. Enma will spread the word once it's confirmed.

With ANBU intel, describe area around Rock fort. Is this the same location Kumokogo referred to?

Have the Arachnids always guarded Great Seal? Did they meet the Sage?

Can other Clans send Diplomats to Arachnid?

OFFSCREEN: If yes, ask other Leaf Summoners to send ambassadors to Arachnid.

Bears

Let Dog diplomat lead

We bring news of DRAGONWAR.

There's a nascent plan to unite many clans against the threat, but it's still in early stages, so we welcome criticisms.

Explain Crusader idea.

Additionally, if the Bears are amenable to it, involving more Summoners would help the crisis. Do they have ideas of where their scroll is, and are they interested in having a Summoner aid them?

Explain 7th path trading as well.

I'm a little concerned that getting someone a chocolate statue of them will be a little weird... much less Kagome, who might find it very unnerving to be consumed in effigy.
Long-distance running might be represented as Physique, not Athletics. I think "speed" is the right word for Athletics techniques. Though, we'd be okay with techniques that raised it temporarily too (especially mental resilience, since that's the one that we only need to have for a second).
Can we not duplicate the "Pantsaa sent a..." section?
Inconsistency between (OFFSCREEN) and (Offscreen prep) is a little annoying imo.
Not sure if it's okay to nickel-and-dime words by writing "DRAGONWAR" instead of "Dragon War"

Along the lines of point two, I'd like to bring up Noumero's post from when I proposed a Dogs plan:

Noumero said:
I suggest specifying that we ask this of Kumokogo and of the bosses of the Toads and the Pangolins, too. Oh, and ask all of them about Clans notorious for weak wills, who are thus likely to have developed such techniques. Oh, and ask Keiko to search the Leaf library for those, too. Oh, and ask Yuno about this too; didn't the Takahashi display some powerful mind-based ninjutsu during the fight with the quisling tyrant?

So: ask the Dogs, the Arachnids, the Toads, the Pangolins, and ask these about other Clans that might have them, search the Leaf library, and ask Yuno. This net should be wide enough that we find something useful.

I think there's a way to rework this effectively:

Create a set of things to discuss with each boss: namely, jutsu, crusade, Condor scout.
In each sub-part, ask the "boss questions"
Ask Noburi and Keiko is ask the "boss questions" as well. (this could be good to get other bosses invested in workshopping the Crusade idea!)

We can put 1. Other clans with weak wills, 2. Leaf Library, and 3. Isan on another plan, as they don't fit the theme as well (though maybe other clans fits?).

Lailoken · Jul 16, 2021

_The_Bomb said:
You know, I would actually sign off on that.

"Sasuke, you once told me that 'if I ever want advice on how to run a proper leaf clan, I should turn to the Uchihia.' You may have been joking, but I would sincerely appreciate some advice on the matter. We may have some minor ideological differences but there's no denying the Uchiha's long record of success. The Goketsu are a new clan and, without Jiraryia, don't have much institutional knowledge. There's a few things I'd like to hear your thoughts on, starting with how to properly delegate important tasks within the clan…."

"Also, how to avoid getting thrown into a killbox every other weekend."

Sentient Tree · Jul 16, 2021

You know, the turtles might have jutsu to raise resolve, since it sounds like a stat that would be necessary for older turtles to get past the lethargy and apathy that the Spirit of Youth counters.

Cariyaga · Jul 16, 2021

_The_Bomb said:
You know, I would actually sign off on that.

"Sasuke, you once told me that 'if I ever want advice on how to run a proper leaf clan, I should turn to the Uchihia.' You may have been joking, but I would sincerely appreciate some advice on the matter. We may have some minor ideological differences but there's no denying the Uchiha's long record of success. The Goketsu are a new clan and, without Jiraryia, don't have much institutional knowledge. There's a few things I'd like to hear your thoughts on, starting with how to properly delegate important tasks within the clan…."

I would also be willing to vote for a plan that did this as a major part of it.

Tua · Jul 17, 2021

Paperclipped said:
I'm a little concerned that getting someone a chocolate statue of them will be a little weird... much less Kagome, who might find it very unnerving to be consumed in effigy.

I am not, the man loves him some chocolate.

FaintlySorcerous · Jul 17, 2021

I expect him to be...

Touched that we went to such trouble to commission a statue which recognizes his greatness. (The statue isn't just going to be him standing there.)
Awkward about the fact that we're saying nice things about him.
Very excited to eat and share the chocolate.
Torn about the fact that he has to ruin the art to each the chocolate.

Only after those emotions have finished processing do I imagine that he'll feel particularly odd about the fact that he's eating his hand, but made of chocolate, and I expect that he'll shrug and put more weight on the fact that chocolate is available.

Now, the caramel lupchanzen (sp?) in his head might give him some pause.

faflec · Jul 17, 2021

FaintlySorcerous said:
Now, the caramel lupchanzen (sp?) in his head might give him some pause.

Oooh, we could do a series of statuettes of Kagome blowing up lupchanzen and other stinkers.

Velorien · Jul 17, 2021

faflec said:
Oooh, we could do a series of statuettes of Kagome blowing up lupchanzen and other stinkers.

KAGOME: Hold on. How do you know what lupchanzen look like?

HAZŌ: The voices in my head told me what to sculpt.

KAGOME: [faflec.reaction]

_The_Bomb · Jul 17, 2021

FaintlySorcerous said:
Touched that we went to such trouble to commission a statue which recognizes his greatness. (The statue isn't just going to be him standing there.)

faflec said:
Oooh, we could do a series of statuettes of Kagome blowing up lupchanzen and other stinkers.

Don't forget about Kagome's views on the afterlife. According to him, you're stuck hanging out in purgatory until no one remembers you in the Human Path. IIRC he explicitly named building statues of someone dead as "prolonging their suffering."

This makes no difference for a temporary, chocolate statue (he might even be touched that we went out of our way to have the statue be both self-destructing and delicious) but would matter a great deal for actual statues.

edit: did a faflec and found the quote

eaglejarl said:
"So the Naraka Path is the afterlife?" Hazō asked.

Kagome-sensei nodded and took another bite from the cooling egg sandwich that he had momentarily forgotten he was holding. He continued speaking while he masticated. "Everyone goes there. You stay a while, losing your memories one at a time as your loved ones die or forget them. Your body slowly fades from existence as your memories evaporate until there's nothing left but an empty mind floating in void, struggling to recall who and what it was and understand why it can't touch or be touched, speak or hear, see or be seen. Only when every trace of you is lost back in the real world will you finally find peace as your soul unravels into nothing."

"That's horrible," Hazō whispered.

Kagome-sensei shrugged. "It's the world. Of course it's horrible." He gestured vaguely in the direction of Leaf with his egg sandwich. "It's why I don't understand all the statues and stuff. It's like they want to keep their heroes alive in people's memories, stretch out the torment. Seems like the sort of thing you do to your villains, not your heroes. Be much kinder to forget them as quickly as possible."

Kiba · Jul 17, 2021

FaintlySorcerous said:
I expect him to be...

Touched that we went to such trouble to commission a statue which recognizes his greatness. (The statue isn't just going to be him standing there.)

Awkward about the fact that we're saying nice things about him.

Very excited to eat and share the chocolate.

Torn about the fact that he has to ruin the art to each the chocolate.

Only after those emotions have finished processing do I imagine that he'll feel particularly odd about the fact that he's eating his hand, but made of chocolate, and I expect that he'll shrug and put more weight on the fact that chocolate is available.

Now, the caramel lupchanzen (sp?) in his head might give him some pause.

You know what we can do? Merchandising.

Get our chocolatier who got commissioned to do this to sell Goketsu themed merchandising while endorsed by the Goketsu, and we get a cut.

Then we can make ninja action figures!

faflec · Jul 17, 2021

Kiba said:
You know what we can do? Merchandising.

Get our chocolatier who got commissioned to do this to sell Goketsu themed merchandising while endorsed by the Goketsu, and we get a cut.

Then we can make ninja action figures!

*screaming in Naraka!Kagome*

Rafin · Jul 17, 2021

[X] Hazou Limps His Way Across Another Dimension

Velorien · Jul 17, 2021

Kiba said:
You know what we can do? Merchandising.

Get our chocolatier who got commissioned to do this to sell Goketsu themed merchandising while endorsed by the Goketsu, and we get a cut.

Then we can make ninja action figures!

Due to safety concerns and customer feedback, we will be withdrawing the "Combat Kagome Deluxe Action Figure With Real Pre-Infused Exploding Tags" from the Gōketsu Toy Store, effective immediately. Surviving customers are invited to apply for a refund at the front desk.

Shrooms · Jul 17, 2021

Cariyaga said:
I would also be willing to vote for a plan that did this as a major part of it.

HAZOU: Hey Sasuke, how do I deal with my clan constantly wanting to kill each other?
SASUKE: You're asking an Uchiha? Seriously?

faflec · Jul 17, 2021

Shrooms said:
HAZOU: Hey Sasuke, how do I deal with my clan constantly wanting to kill each other?
SASUKE: You're asking an Uchiha? Seriously?

ITACHI: I have a solution.

Kiba · Jul 17, 2021

Shrooms said:
[X] Hazou Limps His Way Across Another Dimension
Word Count: 299

Other (OFFSCREEN)

Commission chocolate sculpture of Kagome

Mari, investigate scarf guy

Reo, bring Hazou the Yakuza victims' information.

Kagome, arrange seal loadout for new Goketsu/Tenten

Introduce Canun to Atomu, relay Cannai's comments about making techniques for Atomu. How can we compensate you?

Also, are there Dog Training Jutsu that improve skills like running or mental resilience? Are they willing to share with Hazou? Hazou's clan?

What would be fair service/payment?

Consult with Cannai later if necessary.

Cannai

Discuss how Ami's Crusader idea could be improved.

Pantsaa sent a Condor to verify DRAGONWAR is real. Enma will spread word once it's confirmed.

Leaf is experiencing famine. Can Hazou trade raw goods, medicines, other projects like the sleds for food or gold?

(OFFSCREEN PREP) Loop in Asuma, is he willing to approve jutsu trades?

Hazou plans to negotiate Crusader idea with Bears. Is there another Dog diplomat that could attend?

Private audience with Kumokogo

What Crusader plan changes would help Arachnids?

Pantsaa sent a Condor to verify DRAGONWAR is real. Enma will spread the word once it's confirmed.

With ANBU intel, describe area around Rock fort. Is this the same location Kumokogo referred to?

Have the Arachnids always guarded Great Seal? Did they meet the Sage?

Can other Clans send Diplomats to Arachnid?

OFFSCREEN: If yes, ask other Leaf Summoners to send ambassadors to Arachnid.

Bears

Let Dog diplomat lead

We bring news of DRAGONWAR.

There's a nascent plan to unite many clans against the threat, but it's still in early stages, so we welcome criticisms.

Explain Crusader idea.

Additionally, if the Bears are amenable to it, involving more Summoners would help the crisis. Do they have ideas of where their scroll is, and are they interested in having a Summoner aid them?

Explain 7th path trading as well.

Wonder why we aren't involving Mari in negotiating for gold?

Shrooms · Jul 17, 2021

Paperclipped said:
Not sure if it's okay to nickel-and-dime words by writing "DRAGONWAR" instead of "Dragon War"

We've been spelling it that way for a while so I don't see it as an issue, could also just put "Dragons" or "crisis" and convey the same meaning for 1 word anyways.

FaintlySorcerous · Jul 17, 2021

Velorien said:
Due to safety concerns and customer feedback, we will be withdrawing the "Combat Kagome Deluxe Action Figure With Real Pre-Infused Exploding Tags" from the Gōketsu Toy Store, effective immediately. Surviving customers are invited to apply for a refund at the front desk.

We did want to drive an interest in prosthetics...

_The_Bomb · Jul 17, 2021

Kiba said:
Wonder why we aren't involving Mari in negotiating for gold?

(OFFSCREEN PREP) Loop in Asuma (and Mari), is he willing to approve jutsu trades?

You can make room for this by changing "as well" to "too" at the end and by changing "Do they have ideas of where their scroll is, and are they interested in having a Summoner aid them?" to "Do they have ideas of where their scroll is? Are they interested in having a summoner aid them?"

@Shrooms

Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest

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