Vecht
Self-Requested Ban
- Location
- Snarksville, Snarkland
Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest
- Thread starter eaglejarl
- Start date
-
- Tags
- naruto rationalist romance armageddon is looking better and better damn you kishimoto explosions everywhere explosives solve everyone if in doubt surrender to the mercy of zabuza it seemed like a good idea at the time looks like a really bad case of being a jōnin my god. where does the lore end? precommitting is the winning plan screaming in kagome screw the rules i have explosives something bad might still happen sometimes you gotta sociopath stabby zabby subsection c of paragraph 9 should include we can weaponize this so hard
- Location
- The Maple Syrup Mountains
[X] Action Plan: (FTS) Mining the Ore
- Location
- London
- Pronouns
- He/Him/They/Them
- Consider what constitutes the true essence of Hazou
- Begin writing a list of categories into which aspects of identity may be sorted
- Begin populating those categories with lists of descriptors
- Make sure to make an index of cross-references when descriptors suit multiple categories
- ...
- Begin writing a list of categories into which aspects of identity may be sorted
Threnodist
occupying Haudenosaunee & Osage land she/her/hers
- Location
- Pittsburgh
In what ways are we proposing the Yakuza cheat rich foreign nobles out of their money? And why are these propositions A) something that requires our participation B) something only we are likely to have come up with
Emstar
The Shining One
- Location
- Trapped in an extradimensional rift.
- Pronouns
- She/They
A) Hazou can use the IN to cheat at gambling as he has many times (in his backstory). Throwing dice, etc. We put some strategy down in a prior plan or two. I can expand if people think its worthwhile.
*thinks*
Yeah so making sure this goes correctly could save us at least 10-20 plans worth of bulletpoints consisting of "Do XYZ for money." so I think its likely worthwhile.
B) Even if the Yaks have a handful of other nin to do this, theres no reason we cant go on board as well. Our friendship (and Jiraiya's, as one of the most powerful individuals on the planet, Hokage title aside) is worth going out of their way just a bit.
Threnodist
occupying Haudenosaunee & Osage land she/her/hers
- Location
- Pittsburgh
Okay. I thought this had something to do with the tournament, but either way.
The Yakuza are the house, they literally always win no matter what. I highly doubt that whatever marginal benefits they can gain from having us cheat in their casinos would be worth the risk of the discovery of their collusion with us and the subsequent loss of reputation when they're clientele finds out they have Iron Nerve users on their payroll to cheat them.
Vecht
Self-Requested Ban
- Location
- Snarksville, Snarkland
Jiraiya already signed off on this, and the Mist Yakuza have plenty of reason to work with us already. Also as @MMKII states, we offer them quite a bit, if nothing else by virtue being ninja. Avoiding discovery and reputation hits is well within our abilities, much more so with their assistance.
- Location
- UK
But not the people who live in the US xor celebrate it. Screw them.
Emstar
The Shining One
- Location
- Trapped in an extradimensional rift.
- Pronouns
- She/They
We're also explicitly targeting foreigners that are only here for the Chunin Exams. Rich merchants from 7 countries away, etc.
People who are likely only going to remember how they got really drunk and lost a small fortune in a gambling den a few hundred miles from where they usually operate. That sort of thing.
Threnodist
occupying Haudenosaunee & Osage land she/her/hers
- Location
- Pittsburgh
To me, it seems like an unecesssry risk for the long term standing of the Yakuza for a very meagre short-term payout. Especially when they definitely already have other systems in place to swindle foreign nobles (free drinks, beautiful women for them to "impress" by flaunting their wealth, rigging the games, etc.)
I GUESS if the Yakuza value a closer relationship with us over a potential long-term hit to their reputation they'd be willing to play ball, but that's the only inroad I see.
They usually lose a small fortune in a gambling den.
Unnecessary risk? Long term reputation hit? Jiraiya would have warned us that they may be unwilling to play ball if that's the case.
Vecht
Self-Requested Ban
- Location
- Snarksville, Snarkland
I want to see Thanksgiving rebranded as "Solidarity Day" and adopted as an international holiday.
Nobody gets screwed. Nobody gets left out. We're all in this shit together, and we'll figure it out.
Ridiculous amounts of food and uncomfortable amounts of socializing with distant relatives for ERYBODY.
idk worst case they say "No, thanks"?
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Threnodist
occupying Haudenosaunee & Osage land she/her/hers
- Location
- Pittsburgh
Do you honestly think that the Yakuza haven't thought of a thousand and one ways to swindle rich foreigners that DONT involve us? What use is another one on that thousand? If the Yakuza's daily clientele finds out they are using ninja to cheat I can guarantee you the loss of steady revenue from routine clients will offset any marginal extra gains we can give to them.
I also think you're assuming that Jiraiya is always right, which he isn't.
We might want to prepare one short counter argument if this is something we seriously want to pursue
Emstar
The Shining One
- Location
- Trapped in an extradimensional rift.
- Pronouns
- She/They
Keiko's literal worst nightmare.
I approve.
I don't see what the issue is here. The Yakuza are not a casino. The Yakuza are 12th century criminals.
They don't need to have escorts. They can just have prostitutes.
They don't need to have a rep, they're the only game in town.
They're not going to try to rig the games overly much either. They do want people to play.
We don't cheat the daily clientele. Hell, we can even buy them some drinks.
They have no reason to care. It's not their money on the line.
At worst its "Oh, some sneaky ninja got in past our security. Don't you hate how that happens? Well, we will look out for this individual in the future..."
- Location
- UK
I should point out I was making a joke.
Vecht
Self-Requested Ban
- Location
- Snarksville, Snarkland
...What are those?
- Location
- Academy City
- Pronouns
- They
- Location
- Snakesden
"$100,000 - I will write your fan ninja into the canon MfD story
$1,000,000 - your fan ninja will survive their first mission in the story"
- eaglejarl's patreon, probably
Er, democracy? Sure, there's an implicit threat of violence there, but it's pretty implicit.
Anyway, there's always the threat of violence when it comes to international relations, and avoiding that threat is in fact a great reason for governments to cultivate peace and prosperity.* And power is pretty multidimensional. Making your country marginally less militarily safe to bring in trade that will give your government money and increase your personal importance vs domestic rivals? Seems like a plausible deal.
* obviously this depends on the culture in question (MfD nin being pretty militaristic) and the violence in question. MfD wars seem pretty high-variance, which should tilt risk-averse leaders away from war. (If war was almost always a trade of a couple Jonin one way or another, it'd be pretty comfortable for Kage. As it is, my impression is that S-rankers' lives and villages are on the line in every major conflict.))
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Wiadi
Uncompromising Radical Leftist
- Location
- Something Clever
- Pronouns
- She/Her
On the other hand, reducing or removing the threat of war could jeopardize the Kages' authority - they are largely military dictators.
- Location
- UK
The Dragon King basically forced democracy on Bhutan a decade ago, giving up his power against the general will of the people, if my reading is right.
No, this is not figurative.
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Hmm. The Kage cannot force a civilian government given the unequal power disparity between civilians and ninja, thus a civilian government will always serve at the pleasure of the military.
A King in our world works differently since he doesn't have any personal magic power that he can use to subjugate the rest of the population.
A King in our world works differently since he doesn't have any personal magic power that he can use to subjugate the rest of the population.
- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Today, threatening clan heirs with orgies. Tomorrow, the world!
Cariyaga
Handsome Gentleperson
- Location
- United States
Game Night is the ultimate in Goketsu clan social engineering technology.
- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
I was expecting more evil by now. This is what happens when people vote in plans literally titled "The Sensible Approach". You even did it in a safe site in the middle of nowhere so I couldn't in good conscience spring unpredictable nasty surprises on you. Not that I'd ever do such a thing.