Sabu Tjinder's mansion was a rather impressive affair, considering it was built on the side of a Himalyan mountain. Baljeet had never asked his Uncle why he chose to live on the peak of an almost unreachable mountaintop, for fear of the answer being a musical number.
His vacation was turning out to be enjoyable so far. Despite his uncle's many eccentricities, he knew how to treat his guests well, and there was very little insanity in Nepal to speak of. There was certainly nobody urging him to put on a kimono and fishnets and go around damaging a megacorporation's personal property. He shuddered at the thought, and hoped that the rest of his friends would see how bad of an idea that was before something happened to them.
After another long day, there was nothing more he wanted to do than take advantage of the huge bedroom he had been staying in and fall asleep for the night. Evenings up here got very dark, there was no nightlife to speak of, and even if there was he was much too young to take part in it. All he wanted to do was get some sleep, wake up refreshed, and get a head start tomorrow on his summer calculus homework.
As he turned off the lights and climbed into bed, he caught some motion outside his window, just out of the corner of his eye. Heh, he thought to himself, What if it's the abominable snowman? Laughing to himself at the absurdity, he pulled up the covers and went to sleep.
---
In his pursuit of the extradimensional poachers, Captain Gantu had run across a… unique problem. It took him very little time to figure out that the contemptible scum were utilizing a series of cross-dimensional rifts to abscond with the protected species, but any attempts he made to pursue them through the rifts ran up against a durasteel wall.
Simply put, he was far too large to fit.
For some unfathomable reason, the poachers had set their rifts to open inside closet doors, and the thirty-some foot Captain was unable to fit inside any of them. He couldn't let an issue like this just fall to the wayside, so he had to find some other alternative.
Some of the locals that appeared to be better off than others had doors that matched their wealth and status. All he had to do was find a house with a door big enough to accommodate his size, and he would be free to mete out justice on the other side.
Solving a problem like this would surely increase his standing in the eyes of the Galactic Federation! He might have been 'missing, presumed dead' in the middle of Evronian space somewhere, but he would show them. Returning back with the head poacher's severed arms would surely get him a commission. Maybe even a promotion!
Privately though, he had to admit a certain degree of… personal displeasure at these unfortunate circumstances. Poachers really were the scum of the galaxy, and ones that preyed on young specimens were even worse. Taking them down was worth putting up with a few complications, such as-
"Howdy there pal! What're ya lookin for?"
Gantu groaned to himself. The 'Abominable' Snowman (Gantu admitted to himself it was quite the appropriate name) had been an unending source of irritation since his arrival. Nonetheless, he had provided him with food, shelter, and the only information he had on his quarry.
He also provided lemon snow cones. Far too many lemon snow cones.
"Still doin yer little stakeout thingy?"
Gantu sighed, irritated. "It's not a stakeout thingy. I'm waiting for the exact moment of dimensional breach so I can pursue the poachers to their own dimension."
"Eh, What is today, Thursday? In this part of the world? Just you watch, they'll be scaring at ten PM local time, guaranteed."
"Barbarians." Gantu muttered, looking through the pair of binoculars again before cross-referencing the data with his PDA. He had managed to jury-rig the ship's computer and his communication device into something that could detect rift openings, and all throughout the surrounding settlement he could see the pinpricks of activity flaring to life. "Even the locals burn fossil fuel instead of something as primitive as emotion."
"You gotta remember, not everyone over there's one of the psychos! I have no idea what this 'kidnapping' stuff is about, and I can't imagine much of anyone else does either."
Gantu made a noncommittal grunt as he settled back into position. "All right, we infiltrate on three. Got it?"
"Wait, do you mean one-two-three or three-two-one?"
"One! Two! Three!" Gantu snapped as he took off like a shot, barreling straight for the wall of the mansion.
The Abominable Snowman blinked.
"Wow. I didn't think he'd actually do it."
---
George Sanderson was not having a very good year.
Oh sure, the multiple 23-19 incidents were unpleasant, but his fur grew back in rapidly and once he got a new assistant they didn't seem to strike him nearly as often. No, what George was upset about was the current state of his workplace.
Monsters Incorporated was a mess.
Despite promising the moon, MI was unable to do anything to stop the rolling brownouts that plagued Monstropolis. If anything, they were only getting worse. With the suits running them ragged every single day, demanding that they put in more overtime without being adequately compensated, tempers were flaring and monsters were quitting in droves.
He had been tempted to quit himself more than once, though with the economy in the state it was, that simply wasn't an option. What had once been a fun work day with good friends devolved into dull monotony- open the door, roar at the kid, run back out after they screamed. Nothing more, nothing less. Where had the exciting career they had promised him in college gone?
With a resigned sigh, he pulled open the closet door without even bothering to read up on the kid inside. Gone were the days of trying to scare them creatively, of creeping around the room and building up to the big moment, or even really basic stuff like matching the scary level to age-appropriate demographics. All he had time for now was to jump out, scream, and pray that the kid screamed back.
As he stepped inside the room, the first thing he noticed was how big the bedroom was. On a better night this would be a great chance to set up a creative scare scenario, but as it stood it just meant a few more seconds between now and when he could clock out for the night. When George started to creep across the floor he became aware of a massive shape outside moving straight for him.
In the space of about ten seconds, multiple things happened at once.
Some hideously large monster crashed through the window with a sound of tearing wood and shattering glass.
The kid in the bed woke up instantly and screamed his head off.
The intruder tossed George to one side, bellowed 'Out of my way, trog!', and darted off through the closet door before George could even react.
Ten seconds later, the factory behind him faded away to nothingness as it was replaced by the interior of the closet.
He stared, slack-jawed, at his new predicament, cautiously looking around the room. The kid was wide awake and staring at him in a mixture of curiosity and terror, an emotion that he mirrored exactly.
"So…" the kid said nervously, after a tense pause. "...do you like charades?"
---
"Well George, it sounds to me like you are caught in a rut. You went to college with the intent to do what you love, but circumstances have changed so you cannot do that any longer. Now I may only be taking college credit classes, but if you ask me, you deserve better than this!"
"Yeah. Yeah, I do deserve better!" George said with renewed conviction.. He had never known that kids could be this conversational! Maybe scaring them all these years was the wrong thing to do. He shuffled the cards again and cut the deck. "You ever play Go Hydra?"
"Don't you mean Go Fish?" the kid asked.
"Nah, I'm a vegetarian." George replied, dealing out eighteen cards to each of them. "So anyway, that's the story of my life. I go back after an incident like this, I'm probably going to get shaved again."
"I understand proper hygiene, but that sounds a tad excessive. Are they really that concerned about cross-dimensional contamination?"
"Like you wouldn't believe! I got decontaminated fourteen times in the last year alone. Static cling is a real hassle!"
"Well, George, this is only my own opinion, of course, but it seems clear to me that your employers have proven themselves an illegitimate authority. March right into your boss' office and tell him that you quit! If they are really that desperate for workers, he will provide you benefits to compensate. And if they are not, then you will have left a very negative working environment. Do not let your boss use 'things are bad for everyone' as a means to keep you from seeking your own self-actualization."
"You know what? You make a good point! As soon as I get back in there, I'm gonna go to Waternoose's office, and-"
Both residents of the room yelped in surprise as the closet door crashed open again! The whale creature from before shambled out, looking extremely irate.
"You are lucky you have no idea what is really going on here." Gantu snarled, picking up George by the scruff of his neck and unceremoniously chucking him through the portal. He wasted no time in crashing through the opposite wall, yielding yet another scream from the unfortunate resident of the room.
A few seconds later, Gantu poked his head back in the giant hole, the winds of the Himalayas whipping in around him.
"Oh, by the way. I was never here."
---
George Sanderson looked around his assembled coworkers nervously. "Wow, guys, that was a close-"
"THIRTY-THREE HUNDRED! WE HAVE A THIRTY-THREE HUNDRED!" his former assistant Charlie yelped. That pusillanimous little worm! If he ever got his hands on him, he-
Oh.
He was surrounded by CDA agents already.
That wasn't good.
---
George marched down the hall to Waternoose's office, barging right past his secretary. What was the worst thing they could do, fire him?! He was already shaved naked, dripping in the decontamination fluid, with that big embarrassing cone around his neck. As he kicked open the door, all the times he played this out in his head came rushing back.
Mr. Waternoose was doing paperwork and looked rather surprised to see him. "Uh, what-"
"I quit!"
"I'm sorry, I don't-"
"I said I quit! I've had it up to here with the way you treat your workers! Overtime shifts with no extra pay, calling us in on holidays, no time off in the last two years!"
"My boy, the economy needs-"
George told Mr. Waternoose exactly what he could do with the economy, and got so caught up in his own ranting that he continued on for a good five minutes more. He aired his grievances with everything from the lack of healthcare to the low quality of toilet paper in the bathrooms, and how they never managed to stock durian juice in the vending machines!
"...and I can't take it anymore! I just don't have the heart to do what you're asking, whether that's scaring or… or whatever else is going on around here!"
Waternoose sat up, his face changing from a general dejection to sharp interest in an instant. "And what is that, my dear boy?"
"I… I don't know. But something feels different than it used to. And that whale guy he… he said something strange was happening."
"Have you told anyone else about this?"
"Well, no, not as such."
"You know, I can respect a man of your convictions." Waternoose said firmly as he stood up from behind his desk and scuttled out next to George. "You've made some perfectly valid points. We here at MI are sad to see you go, but you can rest assured that we'll leave you off with a nice severance package."
"Wait, really?"
"Absolutely. We know how to take care of our own."
---
George trudged aimlessly through a massive snowdrift. He was still trying to work through… he still couldn't comprehend what had just happened to him. In front of him, some vast shape loomed.
"WELCOME TO THE HIMA- oh. Hey! It's you again. Hi there pal!" The Abominable Snowman said. "Got hooked for an all-nighter? Hope they're paying you overtime."
Gantu looked at George and groaned.
"Snow cone?" He asked resignedly.
---
Inator Roll:
The Mystery-Inator! Something affects your next turn, but you don't know what! It is a mystery!
---
Laser Pirate Subvote: Captain Laser has offered to sell you plans for the SHV 20905 laser that he burgled from ENCOM for the low low price of ten million dollars! This will cause a minor decrease in income but will get you access to some highly proprietary plans. You can be sure that your fellow industrialists are already taking advantage of this deal- do you want to as well?
[ ] Buy the laser
[ ] Don't buy the laser
There will be a six hour moratorium on the vote, just to give everyone a chance to discuss the interlude without drowning it in votes.
