Tua
鸡肉面条汤
- Location
- شوربة الدجاج المعكرونة
Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest
- Thread starter eaglejarl
- Start date
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- Tags
- naruto rationalist romance armageddon is looking better and better damn you kishimoto explosions everywhere explosives solve everyone if in doubt surrender to the mercy of zabuza it seemed like a good idea at the time looks like a really bad case of being a jōnin my god. where does the lore end? precommitting is the winning plan screaming in kagome screw the rules i have explosives something bad might still happen sometimes you gotta sociopath stabby zabby subsection c of paragraph 9 should include we can weaponize this so hard open voting
Emstar
The Shining One
- Location
- Trapped in an extradimensional rift.
- Pronouns
- She/They
Better phone that place up for the creaky chicken recipe because Mari has some fessin' up to do!
- Location
- Book Fort
- Pronouns
- They/Them
I actually think we're more likely to check the severity of the secret, and then ask if the New Goketsu in question needs help hiding it. Although, that'd make for an amusing line of dialogue.
NG: "I've been keeping secrets from you all."
HAZOU: "Does the secret threaten the existence of the human species, or the security of the Leaf?"
NG: "I... I tell you that I've been hiding secrets, and the implications of (at least) indirect dishonesty that go with it... And you ask if it'll threaten humanity?"
HAZOU: "Yes, and don't think I haven't noticed that you haven't answered my question. I was serious. Tell the truth."
NG: "Uh... No? No, it doesn't."
HAZOU: "Oh, good, must be relatively small, then. You're fine, let me know if you need help hiding it."
NG (whispering to themselves): "What kind of Clan have I joined?"
Haru (passing by): "One that's led by a sealmaster who was trained by Kagome."
NG: "That... That actually explains a lot more than it should."
NG: "I've been keeping secrets from you all."
HAZOU: "Does the secret threaten the existence of the human species, or the security of the Leaf?"
NG: "I... I tell you that I've been hiding secrets, and the implications of (at least) indirect dishonesty that go with it... And you ask if it'll threaten humanity?"
HAZOU: "Yes, and don't think I haven't noticed that you haven't answered my question. I was serious. Tell the truth."
NG: "Uh... No? No, it doesn't."
HAZOU: "Oh, good, must be relatively small, then. You're fine, let me know if you need help hiding it."
NG (whispering to themselves): "What kind of Clan have I joined?"
Haru (passing by): "One that's led by a sealmaster who was trained by Kagome."
NG: "That... That actually explains a lot more than it should."
- Pronouns
- He/Him
- Location
- The state of Paranoia
In fairness, they just joined a clan led by Hazō the Treason Bunny. We don't sweat the small stuff.
- Location
- USA
- Pronouns
- He/Him
No he's not...?You are missing the threadmark for Chapter 391.
- Location
- Europa, Jupiter Orbit
Who is the KEI representative currently? Have they been the same person in every Council meeting we attended?
Also, now I am imagining the shit storm that would happen if a Clan wanted to adopt someone, that someone was okay with being adopted, and the KEI tried to block this from happening.
- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
The KEI representative is one Shimura Yūichi, and yes.
Chapter 391: The Pitfall Traps of Progress
- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Traditionally, the Nara saw early mornings much as the Hoshigaki saw vegetarian diets—as a cruel weapon developed by enemy clans long ago, and propagated throughout society with false promises of heightened energy and health benefits so as to ruin clans less perspicacious than theirs. As such, Hazō was surprised to see the compound such a hive of activity. The front courtyard was being used for training by Tenten and the Snowflakes—who had turned to wave to him in perfect unison in a way that totally wasn't creepy—and the former site of the main building was host to a passionate debate between a number of Nara and KEI ninja (including, of all people, a frivolously-dressed but serious-looking Yoku Hatten, who gave Hazō a surreptitious hand-to-heart salute).
"What's going on back there, anyway?" Hazō asked an already weary-looking Shikamaru, who gazed at him over the desk with an unmistakable expression of "I've been up since dawn, and now there's you".
"Burly man?" Shikamaru asked. "Black hair in dreadlocks? Wearing metal bracers on his arms despite being off-duty?"
Hazō nodded.
"I see you have encountered the Tsuchimikado Team. Keiko, I lack the energy for exposition, so could you kindly take over?"
"I would love nothing more," Keiko said tonelessly. "Hazō, Tsuchimikado Nanao is one of Leaf's leading Earth ninjutsu researchers. I am given to understand that he reinvented the extinct Ochi Clan's Pitfall Trap Technique, then improved on it with the acclaimed Pitfall Trap with Spikes at the Bottom Technique. His most recent project, currently on hold, is a new stage that he claims will eliminate the technique's primary failure mode."
"What's that?"
"Survivors.
"Two weeks ago, he presented an unrelated proposal to the KEI, whereupon we assembled an ad hoc panel of experts to evaluate it, then placed him in contact with potential assistants, an experienced administrator to serve as project manager—I imagine you recognised him outside; it is lamentably difficult not to—and a pair of negotiation specialists to represent him in talks with the Nara."
"So what was the proposal?" Hazō asked. Outside, there was a very Keiko-like yelp of pain, and then the girl in front of him winced.
"Tsuchimikado's original title was Project Develop Our Own Advanced Digging Ninjutsu, Way Better than Those Rock Scumbags' Ninjutsu, and Then Use It to Dig Up the Stuff They Buried So We Can Sell it Back to the Clans at a Huge Profit. This lasted only until Ami had finished laughing, and it is now known as Project Earth Emperor.
"The Nara are providing support for the research in exchange for retaining exclusive use of the Tsuchimikado Team's services until recovery of Nara assets and remains is complete. Unfortunately, yours truly has been stuck with designing the security arrangements, as the only person trusted both by the Nara to protect clan secrets and by the KEI not to murder diggers in order to do so. It seems none of us can escape our grim destinies."
Hazō and Shikamaru both gave her questioning looks.
"My parents are security experts," she explained. "As Ami was obviously meant for greater things, it was a natural expectation that I would succeed them in the role, in the unlikely event that I became a chūnin and gained the corresponding clearance levels.
"But enough about the sadistic creativity with which karma reasserts itself in our lives. Hazō, what brings you to our humble home?"
"Keiko,"—Hazō grinned—"I've had a brilliant idea."
"Hazō," Keiko said levelly, "two days ago, it was necessary for me to speak to Dr Yakushi as part of the process for undoing the Hagoromo quarantine at the Hokage's orders. While inflicting small talk upon me, Dr Yakushi asked me to pass on his compliments to my sister: apparently, the atmosphere in Orochimaru's laboratory has improved considerably now that they have a regular supply of shinobi who are resolved to face death with dignity, and therefore do not scream quite so much.
"This is my life now, and yet your words still manage to send a shiver down my spine."
"No, no," Hazō said. "This isn't an 'accidentally unleash a genocidal war' idea, or a 'blow up the world if anything goes wrong' idea, or even a 'get everyone killboxed due to the Powers that Be wrongly thinking I'm trying to commit treason' idea. This one is perfectly safe and universally beneficial."
Shikamaru and Keiko exchanged glances.
"I ask your forgiveness, dear wife," Shikamaru said gravely. "I had always assumed your past trauma stemmed from growing up in a brutal totalitarian state where those around you constantly tormented you and denied your value."
"Not at all, beloved husband. I think it likely that those experiences did play a certain contributing role."
"Very funny," Hazō grumbled. "Now do you want to hear my idea, or should I go straight to Asuma to ask his opinion?"
It took Hazō a moment to process the sound that came out of Keiko's mouth as "Please continue", compressed for speed until it barely counted as a syllable.
"It's very simple," Hazō began. "We pass a law allowing the clans to claim extra adoption slots, but for every one they claim beyond the standard number, the Tower decreases its stipend proportionately, so the amount of money going through the system doesn't change, but the clans can still have more ninja.
"It's a win-win situation. Every new clan ninja still gets the full benefits of clan training, exclusive techniques, and generally all the resources they need to become extra-powerful and make Leaf stronger, and the clans get to repopulate quickly after all the disasters of the past year. You're the last people I need to tell what a big deal that is right now.
"Obviously, we'll clear it with Asuma first, but since it won't affect the Tower directly, and it won't harm Leaf's military readiness—just the opposite—I can't imagine why he'd say no. He's been very clear about his priorities.
"I don't think we'll have any trouble drumming up support prior to the vote either. A lot of clans have suffered heavy losses, and even those that haven't, like the Uchiha or for that matter the Kei, stand to gain enormously. It's a win-win for everyone. I'm thinking of calling it the Clan Restoration Act."
In the winter of Hazō's fourth year at the Academy, a clanless classmate had chosen his words poorly when insulting a Yuki girl in the year above, and her big brother declared it a matter of clan honour. The boy's family hadn't been allowed to extract the body until the ice melted in the spring. That was the image that came to mind when Hazō saw Keiko's reaction, or lack of it.
Shikamaru, on the other hand, looked intrigued. "The stipend mechanics would be the sticking point, I imagine, but those are within the realm of negotiation and optimisation. The basic idea is sound. Granted, it is best not to be over-optimistic: I am aware that you have been purchasing adoption slots, and their availability in itself should tell you that clans often refuse to dilute their bloodline, and accept potential spies into their ranks, even where no financial trade-off is involved. However, it is not as if acceptance of this law would be a compulsion to adopt; rather, it represents a simple expansion of options. The Nara, having long since acknowledged the objective fact that a bloodline must be regularly enriched if it is to prosper, would only welcome additional opportunities for optimisation, even if we ultimately decide not to employ them."
He sat silently for a few seconds, considering.
"Those not wishing to take advantage of the law would naturally seek to prevent others from doing so, but on the whole, I suspect they would be in the minority. I note in passing that the law would widen the gap between the wealthier clans and the minor ones for which training and supporting additional shinobi involves measurable costs that the stipend offsets, though that is of limited relevance as far as Council support is concerned.
"I concur that your proposal would be to Asuma's tastes as well, for the reasons you have listed and some obvious others. You were wise to come to us with this first, insofar as the Nara will inevitably be involved at the stage of running the numbers to ensure that the Tower's interests are preserved.
"Of course," he noted, looking to Keiko, "there are additional considerations."
Keiko nodded slowly.
"Hazō," she said, "you have placed me in an untenable position. As the second-in-command of the Nara, I agree fully with everything Shikamaru says. It is our responsibility to restore the clan's power by whatever means we can find. The clansmen who have entrusted their lives and livelihoods to us deserve nothing less. Insofar as your proposal will surely assist in this—on the admittedly bold assumption that there are no critical flaws in it that I have thus far failed to recognise—it is incumbent on me to assist you with its development and final implementation to the best of my ability."
She took a deep breath.
"Simultaneously, as a coordinator of the KEI, I can only interpret it as a declaration of war."
As a what of what?!
"Keiko," Hazō said urgently, "I'm not sure what you're misunderstanding, but you're definitely misunderstanding something. The whole point of the Clan Restoration Act is that it benefits everybody—both the clans who get to adopt more ninja and the ninja who get…" Ah, crap.
"Hazō," Keiko said, "allow me for a moment to suspend the catastrophic contradiction you have imposed upon me and speak purely as a representative of the KEI. First, pragmatically, clan adoption is a zero-sum game which the KEI must lose. When a shinobi is adopted, the KEI's power decreases according to the value of that shinobi—which one must assume to be high if they are an adoption candidate to begin with—and the power of a clan, of the clans as a whole, increases by the same amount. This is plain arithmetical fact. Its logical conclusion, in a world where the Clan Restoration Act is enthusiastically exploited, is the destruction of the KEI as a functional organisation, as it is by definition reduced to undesirables who lack the value necessary for their voices to be heard.
"Second, ideologically, clan adoption is the enemy of the world we seek, which is a world where every shinobi of Leaf has access to the resources they require to prosper, irrespective of origin or affiliation. Every adoption is a reaffirmation of the present status quo, that a clanless shinobi's greatest dream should be to abandon their less gifted or less fortunate fellows and join the paradise reserved for the elite, whereafter they and their descendants will continue to benefit from and perpetuate the oppression of those they once called comrades. We endeavour not to judge those who make this choice—I myself once bowed in willing submission before a man whose care for those without his wealth or power ended at reasonably-priced novels—and instead to simply make every shinobi ask the question: 'Is my suffering so great that I will turn and flee from privation while my comrades stay behind and fight?'"
They sat in silence.
"I would like to note," Keiko added, "that I hold the two of you responsible for the position in which I now find myself."
Shikamaru gave her a confused look. "What do you mean, exactly?"
"I should not be compelled to care about people," Keiko said tensely. "I had a perfectly enjoyable—well, miserable but resigned-to—existence in which I needed only care about one individual, then a small number whose gradual expansion never exceeded my slowly-building tolerance. I never asked to feel responsible for the welfare of hundreds of strangers who, for the most part, have done nothing for me and are known to me only by dossier. Yet here I am, after prolonged exposure to unsafe levels of Hazō, followed by support for a friend in the aftermath of disaster—and, yes, I suppose Ami might in some way be a causal factor as well—and suddenly I find myself feeling forced to return unasked-for trust with responsibility. There are hundreds of people whom I am unable to leave to their own devices, lest they undergo suffering I could have prevented with the power they have one-sidedly bestowed upon me. Do you realise I joined the KEI as a functional secretary, a passive balancing factor for a dyad of forceful personalities with disharmonious backgrounds and objectives?"
She stood up sharply, hands on the desk.
"I am Nara Keiko, the genin who failed her Stage VII assessments three times in a row. Who was kidnapped because she was not valuable enough to miss. Who had less will to live than any shinobi in the Swamp. Who came as part of a package deal with the sealmasters and the jōnin. Who was purchased by Nara Shikaku as a curiosity raised in a parallel tradition. That is the real Kei, not this girl who was handed survival and friends and power and love and victory and more power on a plate, and then expected to act as if she were worthy of those gifts. I am not a leader. I am not a champion. I am not a role model. I am not Ami!"
Before either of the boys could muster a response, she ran off.
Shikamaru and Hazō exchanged glances.
"I will admit," Shikamaru said, "that I did not see that coming."
"One seldom does," Hazō said sympathetically. "It's just something you have to get used to."
"She is not wholly incorrect," Shikamaru commented. "Back when I was… at my worst… I did not adequately consider that fact that as a Frozen Skein user, she could hardly have received training for leadership of so much as a four-man team. Still, that was unexpected. I feel as if I may have missed something.
"Regardless, I imagine you can take her position on the KEI issue as representative, if not of the clanless population as a whole, then at minimum of the Triumvirate and other decision-makers. We have entered an age where even the powerful must tread lightly. Something to consider, for both you and me, before your proposal goes any further."
"You know," Hazō said quietly, "just once I'd like to offer an idea without being told it'll throw the village into fire, death, and destruction."
"I understand the Festival Committee is gathering suggestions for this year's Founder's Day decorations," Shikamaru told him seriously. "Ribbon colours and the subjects of painted scrolls are popular topics."
Hazō brightened up. "The Gōketsu can help with that. What if some of the painted scrolls were seals that passers-by could trigger to I'll shut up now."
Shikamaru nodded. "Permit me to return the courtesy, as I have a wife who needs… Quite frankly, I have no idea what she needs, but you and I both know that ninety percent of research is trial and error. Thank you again for bringing your idea to us first."
"Good luck," Hazō said. "Try to make sure there aren't any sharp objects in the room before you talk to her."
"She shares a room with Tenten. I could sooner drink the ocean dry.
"And now, I must bid you good day. If we never meet again, know that you were an acceptable brother-in-law."
"You were not bad either," Hazō said with the gravity of a man delivering a final benediction. "Though you really should have come to more of our parties."
-o-
You have received 1 + 1 = 2 XP.
Fun-to-write bonus included.
-o-
This update covered only the morning (hence the low base XP). There is still time for the rest of the plan today.
-o-
What do you do?
Voting ends on Saturday 21st of November, 1 p.m. New York time.
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- Location
- NY
What's the worst that could happen?
Emstar
The Shining One
- Location
- Trapped in an extradimensional rift.
- Pronouns
- She/They
[x] Authority Doesn't Come from a Rank, It Comes From The People Who Give It To You (Now With More Space!)
- Spend three adoption slots to adopt Atomu, Reo, and (The next most distinguished member of the estate ninja in terms of services rendered to the Gōketsu estate and those living on it) from amongst the ninja working on the estate.
- Apologize for taking so long, the adoption slots thing is a nightmare, and acquiring them is nontrivial.
- Precautions
- Doublecheck with Mari to make sure these specific individuals aren't doing anything ...morally problematic behind our backs? Also that the third choice would be fitting.
- Have a big celebratory feast-party thing in their honor, as well as for all of the other ninja working on the estate.
- These adoptions were selected based on the extraordinary and exemplary service of these individuals. We will be working to get more slots so that no one is left waiting too long.
- You understand that the lack of a clan name is a bit of a stressful situation for some of them, but rest assured that you are working on it.
- You are valued. You are important. Every one of you.
- Expectation management: it might take a couple of years, but hopefully only a handful in a worst-case scenario.
- Tangent: We'll have to have more weekly communal dinners like this, though. It's nice seeing everyone.
- Go talk and mingle with everyone in smaller groups. Check in on how everyone's doing and what they're all up to.
- Spend a few days researching one of the following (whichever Hazō thinks would be easiest or wants to do).
- Bigger storage seals
- Try to make the volume and mass limits larger, with limits TBD based on Hazō's sealing knowledge.
- Macerators v3
- Lower capacity but higher ejection speed. (Maybe turn the sheer force up to 11? (Evil laughter.))
- Slightly-off Storage Seals
- Storage seals that release the contents slightly to the side by a foot or so.
- Bigger storage seals
- Location
- USA
Great chapter, Vel!
Shadow Clones:
We passed a training plan for Akane boosting Resolve here. Could you put that through on the sheets? Akane should be using 4 clones for this chapter.
We missed out on 3 XP from EJ's Sunday chapter. We get 1 from this one, Keiko and Akane both have 0.4x.
Keiko: 1*0.4 = 0.4 XP
Akane: 1*0.4 = 0.4 XP
Keiko is ready for the next FOOM step as well:
[X] Training Keiko: Resolve
Resolve 27 (74 XP + 4 Yamanaka XP)
@eaglejarl @Velorien
Also, can you rule on whether tying the DC on the Resolve check for SC leads to the character taking 1 mental stress or none?
Shadow Clones:
We passed a training plan for Akane boosting Resolve here. Could you put that through on the sheets? Akane should be using 4 clones for this chapter.
We missed out on 3 XP from EJ's Sunday chapter. We get 1 from this one, Keiko and Akane both have 0.4x.
Keiko: 1*0.4 = 0.4 XP
Akane: 1*0.4 = 0.4 XP
Keiko is ready for the next FOOM step as well:
[X] Training Keiko: Resolve
Resolve 27 (74 XP + 4 Yamanaka XP)
@eaglejarl @Velorien
Also, can you rule on whether tying the DC on the Resolve check for SC leads to the character taking 1 mental stress or none?
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- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
1 mental stress.
- Location
- USA
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Was this posted before this and we failed to implement it? The rule as written is that it's on the players to track and anything not posted before the next update is lost.
- Location
- USA
Oh yep, you're right. Edited, we only get 0.4 SC XP for this chapter.
- Location
- USA
Hey y'all, if we want to do sealing research, this is how to get the most bang for our buck.
Current Sealing: 20+16(SSA) = 36 (AB 4)
We can get a little more value with a slightly higher Sealing to get a better AB:
Anyway, the takeaway is that we should grab some Calligraphy levels immediately if we want to do harder projects. Currently, all SSA is doing for us is making projects get done faster and reducing that chance of sealing failure.
Current Sealing: 20+16(SSA) = 36 (AB 4)
- We get preparation bonus for AB days, each bonus being +2, for a total of +8.
- Effective Sealing: 44
- We need Calligraphy + Calligraphy AB = 44 * ⅔ to hit equivalent TNs
- For Sealing checks, we hit 19 (17 + 2(AB))
- We want to hit 30 (= 44 * ⅔), to get the most bang for our buck from SSA
- Consequently, we need Calligraphy 24 -> 24+3(IN)+3(AB) = 30
- Cost: 195 XP
We can get a little more value with a slightly higher Sealing to get a better AB:
- Sealing 24+16(SSA) = 40 (AB 5)
- At which point, we can get another prep day, to hit Sealing 50 after prep-day bonuses
- Then, we would need Calligraphy 28 (+IN+AB = 34) to keep up.
- Cost: 180 XP for Sealing, 106 XP for additional Calligraphy after the previous, 286 XP total
Anyway, the takeaway is that we should grab some Calligraphy levels immediately if we want to do harder projects. Currently, all SSA is doing for us is making projects get done faster and reducing that chance of sealing failure.
- Location
- USA
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Note because this is something that I got wrong before: The day that you make the infusion does not count as prep, meaning that if you want a +8 bonus then it takes a total of 5 days (4 to prep, 1 to infuse). Again, I only mention this because I got it wrong before.
- Location
- Yes.
Can we do basic research into a sound-recorder seal?
- Location
- USA
Yep, we spend AB+3 days on a "sealing cycle": AB days of prep, 1 day of infusion, 2 days of SSA recovery, currently 7 days.
Though, I had a separate question for the level calculations. Under The Infusion Check in the rules doc, it seems that we can lower the TN by 6 by taking infusion slowly and using the time ladder. Does that apply for research infusions?
- Location
- The Maple Syrup Mountains
Keiko is currently at her chakra softcap, since she cannot support 5 clones (275 CP) at once (in fact, it's a bit of a sticky situation whether/how she's been able to sustain 4 clones per day in the first place with YTJ also up).
Currently, I'm thinking the best plan for her is to push towards SC 40, which we'll want eventually anyways and for which it would be best to do that when we are currently softcapped by Chakra instead of Resolve. But either way, as it is I don't endorse Resolve 27 for Keiko right now, until we deal with the chakra softcap.
(thanks for doing this, btw, I was pretty busy last cycle and I'm glad to see that there's no single point of failure here)
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- Location
- USA
Mmm, good point. I would assume there's some amount of chakra we can skim off of Noburi's rounds for shadow clones right now to bypass the softcap, since Keiko only needs ~10 per day to sustain 5. (EDIT: with Wakahisa overcharging, she can get 5% (13 CP) without Consequences, which is why she can do it in one cast. Past there, she'll need extra CR levels)
Also, because I was curious, I checked out whether it would be quicker to go for 1 level of CR to get 1.5x, then to go for SC 40. Answer: nope.
What we should do is get an in-universe answer for how much chakra we have in excess right now, as we presumably buy too much day-to-day. If the answer is at least 10, push for Resolve 27, then SC 40.
EDIT: Akane needs 6 CP extra to maintain 6 clones? So if we can skim ~20 CP total off Noburi's operations, we can also have Akane run 6 clones on the push to SC 40. Past that, I think we'll need to do multiple casts, which is probably unviable while we don't have the pond up since that'll cost ~200 CP per person.
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- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Keiko approves of this message. Having longer-lasting clones would be a solution to the problem of Snowflake not having time to do Snowflake things due to spending all her time training (which is an untenable situation in the long term).