Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest
- Thread starter eaglejarl
- Start date
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- Tags
- naruto rationalist romance armageddon is looking better and better damn you kishimoto explosions everywhere explosives solve everyone if in doubt surrender to the mercy of zabuza it seemed like a good idea at the time looks like a really bad case of being a jōnin my god. where does the lore end? precommitting is the winning plan screaming in kagome screw the rules i have explosives something bad might still happen sometimes you gotta sociopath stabby zabby subsection c of paragraph 9 should include we can weaponize this so hard
On the other hand, this is time ripe for reforms.
- Location
- The Maple Syrup Mountains
Yeah, it looks like Ami's going full-bore on clanless rights with the AMI. I wonder how long we'll need to wait before we can copy it from them like Mist copied village structure from Leaf way back when.
- Location
- France
Remember "Boom Boom Paradise" ?
Because I do, and I miss it. Someday...
We should name Hazo's shonen novel series: "Boom Boom Paradise".
- Location
- Europa, Jupiter Orbit
@eaglejarl Do you track Kagome's XP gain? Are his plans any good over in Kagome quest? Because getting him to S-rank would be the best way to accomplish your challenge I think.
And if XP thrives on challenges, then he should get the most out of solving unusual social interactions in novel non-lethal ways.
And if XP thrives on challenges, then he should get the most out of solving unusual social interactions in novel non-lethal ways.
- Location
- Actually pretty lost
Was just browsing old updates and stumbled across this, bolded for emphasis:
Tenten's already had offers of adoption. I suspect she'll accept ours, but it's worth noting that adopting promising ninja into your clan is apparently already a done thing after all.
@faflec
Re-iterating a previous concern with subsection 3 of paragraph B
I get that we might want to adopt Kabuto but I feel that he should only have access to clan secrets such as the workings of Noburi's bloodline when/if he becomes part of the clan.
It's not a big deal, since the plan has Noburi do it, so he'll shut it down if it's a bad idea; he might, however, show disappointment in Hazou's seeming disregard for Noburi's bloonline secrets (There is also that precedent of us blabbing about VD (I think) to Minami The Pez Dispenser so this might be a sore spot).
Then again, Naruto isn't eligible to become a summoner, so I guess it's a valid concern.
If we do want to make sure Noburi can properly summon, we could alternatively ask Tsunade (I trust her more than Kabuto and she's a summoner herself). We could also ask Noburi if he knows of any Wakahisa to have been a summoner.
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Noumero
Omit Needless Words
I suspect Naruto isn't eligible to be a summoner because Boss Summons would kill him on sight for housing a demon. Think Pantsaa's reaction to the Mori Voice, except multiplied by ten.
- Location
- Yes.
@faflec
Re-iterating a previous concern with subsection 3 of paragraph B
I get that we might want to adopt Kabuto but I feel that he should only have access to clan secrets such as the workings of Noburi's bloodline when/if he becomes part of the clan.
It's not a big deal, since the plan has Noburi do it, so he'll shut it down if it's a bad idea; he might, however, show disappointment in Hazou's seeming disregard for Noburi's bloonline secrets (There is also that precedent of us blabbing about VD (I think) to Minami The Pez Dispenser so this might be a sore spot).
To be honest I don't quite understand why Noburi would be unable to use summoning jutsu, since he can cast every other jutsu normally.
Then again, Naruto isn't eligible to become a summoner, so I guess it's a valid concern.
If we do want to make sure Noburi can properly summon, we could alternatively ask Tsunade (I trust her more than Kabuto and she's a summoner herself). We could also ask Noburi if he knows of any Wakahisa to have been a summoner.
If Jiraiya OK'd it I'm inclined in favor.
- Location
- Actually pretty lost
I'd be surprised if Naruto had really wanted to be the summoner of a group that considered him to be anathema. It's more likely that whatever markers used to sign the scroll, or the chakra used to fuel the summons, are screwed up by the kyuubi.
- Location
- Yes.
Alright everyone there's 10XP in the pot. I have the idea of changing Hazou's or Naruto's name to Kagome, that way all we have to do is have him elected Hokage later.
- Location
- Actually pretty lost
Shortly before Naruto finally becomes Hokage, we pitch to him that as a prank he should change his name to Kagome for the duration of the ceremony, so that he can go out and declare to the world that Goketsu Kagome was elected Hokage and watch them panic.
So the achievement still counts even if Leaf is devastated to five survivors...
Step One: Elect Hiashi?
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- Location
- The state of Paranoia
Jiraiya might have had some way to prevent Yakushi from spilling the beans or something. Blackmail, for instance. Or perhaps just the knowledge that ticking off an S ranker is a bad idea. It's possible that we don't have whatever it is, although Naruto probably does, being an S ranker as well and having access to Anbu stuff.
Conclusion: ask Naruto if this is still a good idea.
- Location
- Yes.
J would have given us (or Naruto, as you say) said blackmail, and we also have Tsunade and Naruto in our camp.
Emstar
The Shining One
- Location
- Trapped in an extradimensional rift.
- Pronouns
- She/They
There's no reason not to just ask Kabuto. He isn't a part of any rival factions and leaking clan secrets would be extremely bad.
There is no reason to antagonize us in this way (the man repeatedly refuses to be bought out by other clans via offers of marriage) and I don't expect that to change for the time being.
Moreso: he likely has done medical work for other people with bloodlines, and so posseses knowledge of their clan secrets. If word leaks that he spilled the beans, they'll be super worried and angry on the off chance that he's sold them out as well. That means that he'll have to worry about his rep being ruined, possibly being court martialed, and also he wont EVER be trusted to do bloodline work (i.e. the stuff he loves doing) again.
So screwing us over this isn't at all optimal from his perspective.
- Location
- Actually pretty lost
I think he's even done work on Noburi's bloodline, IIRC.
- Location
- Europe
So yeah, getting the Snake scroll isn't going to be easy, if getting the Slug scroll is hard to get with Jiraiya, Naruto and Oro around...
Emstar
The Shining One
- Location
- Trapped in an extradimensional rift.
- Pronouns
- She/They
It implies that its doable though, and thats really all we need. We'll have to haggle with some other clans ultimately post-Hokage vote, but I would think that our unique advantage of "Holy Pangolin Empire Politcs hooooo!!!!" would help out here.
Like, you don't just need to sign the scroll to be accepted as the summoner, you need the clan to accept you. If the Snakes are swayed by Pangolin pressure into accepting the proposed deal, the scroll becomes functionally worthless to anyone in Leaf that isn't us. Erego, the most beneficial thing for Leaf to do is to give us the scroll.
We grease the wheels (as we will be doing anyway for the Hokage vote) with extra grease, and we should be in a pretty good position to take it. If anyone gets salty at us, we can just shrug and say "7th Path politics man hahaha gee willickers" and dodge it.
Cariyaga
Handsome Gentleperson
- Location
- United States
More importantly, perhaps, is that we can use this to secure our influence on the Pangolin and enforce more moral treatment of their conquests. If we can arrange for a tripartite alliance of Pangolin, Toad, and Snake, then if any of the parties renege against us on a deal, then we can further empower the other two parties.
Furthermore, we can offer all three clans instant transportation of goods to their partners in the aliance, further enforcing the alliance through superior trade capabilities.
Furthermore, we can offer all three clans instant transportation of goods to their partners in the aliance, further enforcing the alliance through superior trade capabilities.
Emstar
The Shining One
- Location
- Trapped in an extradimensional rift.
- Pronouns
- She/They
Yeah, this gives us much more leverage to effect change on the 7th path (hey, does no more "Monthly Pangolin Morality Debate" or the endless hemming and hawwing about acquiring more scrolls [I swear if I hear about the Condor/Capybara scroll one more time]sound good to anyone?) that we all want. If we play it right we might be able to swing that into Pax Pangolin and 7th Path UN eventually, which would potentially lead to us setting up EN UN there through some summoners and neutral territory.
Also the logistical implications of 7th Path Instant Delivery are mighty indeed. If we got in on the ground floor of that it would also allow us nigh endless $$$ (import taxes and tariffs lets say ; at worst some clever Spice and Wolf stuff) for which to Uplift.
Cariyaga
Handsome Gentleperson
- Location
- United States
The logistical and trade implications are world-changing in scale, tbh.