...This is only *Part One*? Great...
Ok, let´s look what mayhem we unwittingly created, shall we?
Xanatos Enterprises
[ ] Fortify NYC
DC 100
41+21+35+20+6=123
Critical Success!
Taking advantage of rapidly spiraling fears about Gargoyles, Xanatos has sponsored a general fortification of the broader NYC area, including resource stockpiles, regular flyovers and the transfer of troops from McGuire AFB. As a side effect supervillain attacks, already quite rare in the region, have dropped to almost negligible levels.
[ ] Calm Fears about Gargoyle Attacks
DC 90
10+45+35+8=98
Critical Success!
The authorities' rapid and visible response to the Twelfth Night Attacks has, unexpectedly, succeeded in calming fears. The mood in the Big Apple is still tense, but major riots or calls for violence have been avoided.
So David managed to put a very tight lid on the riotous mood in NYC proper in the wake of both Demonas attack and our..."tweaking" of Life´s dice? That´s as joyous as it´expected (it´s still XANATOS, guys...give that man a little heads-up for planning time and he can turn shit into diamonds with barely an effort)
[ ] ???
DC 100
63+38+35+10=146
Critical Success!
A relatively obscure site from the 90s known as 'So Weird' has seen a sudden resurgence over the past few weeks as the place online to discuss conspiracy theories and other odd happenings. Even though the site itself looks like it hasn't been updated for decades, it enjoys thousands of new viewers every day.
...I got no idea what David is planning by reviving some crummy old conspiracy theorist web site from the last millenium, but he porbably has some grand scheme scheme in place for it.
...What if he´s using that site as a kind of "fishing net" to sift through the pile of mad ramblings find what´s worthwile - meaning to find any user who might be onto the Masquerade (either by sheer dumb luck or actually reasonable ssumptions) and deal with them accordingly? Would fit his MO, if nothing else.
Doofenshmirtz Intrigue Check: What does any of this mean?
DC 120 needed: 32+17=49
Critical Failure!
Eh, it's probably nothing. Maybe public interest in these things is jumping because seemingly mythological creatures were recently revealed to be real after all.
Tbf, that check was doomed to fail from the start, so I am not to hung up about it...despite our Inator apparently triggering on it as well and therefore rendering it Critical.
[ ] Invest in Volatility
DC 90
19+38+35+8=100
Critical Success!
The last few months have seen volatility like you could never imagine. Entire companies rocketed to relevance or dissolved overnight, scandals popped up from unbelievable angles, and the market behaved like a see-saw in a hurricane. Through careful use of Straddle strategies and other tactics meant to take advantage of wild fluctuation, Xanatos Enterprises has come away from it all with a tidy profit and several new divisions in its pocket.
As expected, David also used the upheaval from our Inator as a way to swell his company´s economic power base by gobbling up any small fishes struggling in his backwash.
While I am happy for him, he´d better remember that a large part of this big push he managed to make just now is only because A) WE fucked with Probability and B) told him about it...otherwise, even David "I always come out on top" Xanatos might not have fared as well.
[ ] ???
DC 120
45+72+45+11=173
Critical Success!
You've noticed a few… odd things happening lately, and you're not quite sure what to make of it. Little things like urban legends being debunked, a few papers released on the mechanism of superpowers, a talk show by Anton Sevarius that explained the process by which gargoyles turned to 'stone' overnight… You can't quite put your finger on it, but you're fairly certain that the possibility of 'magic' existing has mostly passed from the public consciousness for the time being, with most of the weird goings-on explained away by a combination of cape weirdness, rumors spread by the uninitiated, and a lack of information transparency on certain things.
Hmm, so David decided to bedazzle the public with "reputable scientific explanations" for weird stuff, so that for now the iea of Magic being an actual thing seems to be less likely...not complaining at all, considering that assholes like the Huntsclan would try to capitalize on the panic resulting from Magic being widely known.
...I still want to make stuff like
@AProcrastinator s Fantasia omake reality at some point, though.
[ ] Collaborate with Drakktech on Rocketry
DC 120
74+28+28+25+20+7=182
Critical Success!
A press release the other day described the results of a joint venture between Drakktech and Xanatos Enterprises as nothing less than miraculous. In only a short few months the companies managed to produce a rocket capable of blowing every existing model out of the water. Powered by a Khan Industries-Drakktech microfusion reactor, the vessel is able to move far faster than anything designed before it, managing to avoid the stresses of the acceleration due to some unknown proprietary technology. NASA seems thrilled with the results and wasted no time in tossing grants at the two companies in return for more technology.
[ ] Help put a man on the Moon
DC 110
91+28+25+30 (Government Grant)+7=181
Critical Success!
To be continued in Interlude: Plan D
The thing we only bothered with because we needed somewhere safe to put Lovemuffin?
Well, since Drakktech and Xanatos Enterprises have made it to the moon, who wants to work with them to put our spiffy new vacuum-proof climate chambers to work? I mean, sure we want to make it to space on our own, but why not make something useful out of the tech Ludivine made instead of working on the SHV laser?
Guys, I know that us getting beaten to space by our Rivals is a bit annoying, but consider this:
The Rivals that suceeded just so happened to be the two Kings we got the most explicitly positive relationship with (although out of the two, Shego is still struggling with seeing us as anything more than "Drakken 2.0" and therefore will need some additional prodding from either us or David to play along and not flash-cook Doofs noggin st the first annoyance) - meaning that we can still get our slice of heaven/Space by collabing with them on it. They might have gotten the hang of shooting a rocket to Luna first, but we can - thanks to our out-of-the-box-thinking and our "Comedize Supply Lines" research option - still help them on the angle of "covering their supply lines once they are up there".
This is actually the *perfect opportunity* to make "Project: DEAR" (DEAR standing for *Doofenshmirtz Evil Asteroid Resto* and detailing my plan a while back of planting down a mining facility on some asteroids and then turning it into an interstellar service area by way of a space elevator and Comedized Supply Lines that will make any deliveries from Earth to our resto and therefore anyone else´s space crafts or space installations nogh instantaneously, if anyone remembers that one) a reality, my friends. Thanks to Shego and Xanatos of all people doing the heavy lifting we can actually benefit from that seeming "defeat" tremendously.
Drakktech
[ ] Sponsor supervillainy
DC 100
67+68+45+9=189
Critical Success!
Word on the criminal grapevine is that a recent spate of supervillain attacks across the country can be traced back to none other than the green queen of mean herself. Nothing that can be proven, of course, but if you had to guess you'd say the Candy-Striped Ruby swiped from the Duckberg Museum last week is probably sitting in one of her jewelry boxes.
Honestly, Shego doubling down on supervillainy might actually be indirectly beneficial to our budding collab with Olympia, considering that now Evelyn has the preamble to double-down on super-*heroics* in turn...and since Deavor was thinking about going to our door about such a collab anyway, that´s good for us.
That being said, those two events do sour my enthusiasm again considerably.
Judge Doom
[ ] Reach out to Evelyn Deavor
DC 70
64+31+26+2=123
Critical Success!
Judge Doom has made overtures towards Olympia that met with warm reception. It seems likely the two are cooking up some sort of arrangement related to Super rights, considering their mutual activism.
???
[ ] ???
An apparently deranged man made headlines today when he interrupted an Olympia tech conference, ranting incoherently about television screens. The individual, who has not been identified, has reportedly been placed into psychiatric care.
...Of fucking course that asshole Doom had to approach approach Deavour as well, meaning that if we want to better the position of capes and finally axe the SRA, we now indirectly have to cooperate with Disneys answer to "Hanging Judge" Freisler...more about my plans regarding Doom later on.
As for the ??? event, that might be Deavor Screenslaving people after all, so before we actually commit to helping her, we should make sure what exactly is going on with her in this timeline.
[ ] Reach out to ENCOM
DC 80
44+18+26+4=92
Critical Success!
It seems as if Greatest Rival Shego caught Ed Dillinger on one of his better days, because the news of a business meeting between the two has leaked. The two companies appear to be working on something very big in the works. ENCOM's recent performance in the technology sector has left many investors salivating.
Dang, now we have to try not hitting Shego as well if we wanna continue our struggle against ENCOM...more on that angle later.
[ ] Research Animal Hybridization
DC 100
66+20+30+20+6=142
Critical Success!
Drakktech announced today preliminary success in safe and reliable hybridization of animal genomes, beginning with the successful creation of a genetically viable mule capable of breeding true. Future plans include the creation of hardier, more productive livestock and increasing the survivability of critically endangered species.
As others have said before, apparently Shego grabbed DNAmy as one of her science operatives - that definitely would lend itself very well for a collab with Drakktech regarding our Dinosaur angle.
Now we only have to ask ourself: Between Jumba and Janus, who of the two would synergize better with DNAmy for maximum profit in doing that collab?
Zaibatsu
[ ] Capture Monsters
DC 140
23+43+27+2=95
Critical Failure!
SFPD Chief Cruz suffered multiple broken bones after an attempt to capture the 'Crew Bats' plaguing the city went horribly wrong. Some are blaming Cruz' refusal to work with vigilante actors, who have had greater success in dealing with the strange monsters overtaking the city.
[ ] Align Funtelligence
DC 110
82+12+29+2=125
Critical Success!
Funtelligence entered a variety of comprehensive agreements today with Bakaemono Corporation, further binding two of the city's largest corporations together.
[ ] Draw Heat off of the Yakuza
DC 100
57+33+29+10+2=131
Critical Success!
The ongoing monster crisis in San Fransokyo has proven the perfect cover for underworld dealings, with the Yakuza reportedly flush with cash and operating with near impunity across the city.
[ ] Investigate Muirahara
DC 120
20+36+34-3=87
Critical Failure!
Some Sycorax scientists were noted to be poking around Muirahara Woods, but nothing much came of it. Presumably they were taking samples to investigate something or other, but as of yet no new projects or reports have come out of the company.
So the Zaibatsu are having a bit of an ambivalent time, with them nailing the corporate/yakuza side of their business ventures, yet getting nailed by the more cryptid"/weirdness-laden endeavours...fair enough
[ ] Roll out a new Line of Cogs
DC 110
89+28+33+3=153
Critical Success!
Following the success of Doom's Cog police force, the Mayor has decided to expand his operations to begin using Cogs in other administrative tasks. The so-called Lawbots, which include models such as the Ambulance Chaser and Spin Doctor, are already taking on positions as legal clerks and administrators.
[ ] Research Flying Mass Transit
DC 90
40+22+26+2=90
Critical Success!
Mayor Doom has begun a program looking into the potential of future personal transportation, largely assumed to be competing with Olympia and DEI entries into the same field. While some are calling this a late-coming attempt to preserve his own market share, rumor has it the company has made great strides in miniaturized propulsion...
Damn, Doom is tightening his grip on LA further...that sucks (although I am a bit confused about the "entry into future personal transportation" DEI supposedly has made, since I don´t explicitly recall us having dabbled in that sector as well in the past).
Chief Cleaver
[ ] Hunt for Bonkers Bobcat
DC 110
29+28+24+24+2=107
Critical Failure!
The plan was perfect. The block was locked down. But one ninnyheaded nimrod just had to post a selfie to Waddle before he got started, and as a result that macavity managed to vamoose before the heavy hand of the law came down on him. Someone's getting demoted for this! ...Cleaver hopes it isn't him.
The DC for Investigating the Death of Hawk has gone down slightly!
HA! At least that creepy mofo shat the bed on that one...That actually gives me an idea how to deal with Doom wedging his way into our atm still informal dealings with Olympia about the Cape/SRA issue.
The DC for Investigating the Death of Hawk going down gives us the opportunity to sic our best Intrigue guys (still torn over whether to go for Russ´ Toon-sense or the Commodore´s raw Intrigue...considering that the Blot may be coming knocking next turn, we might have to let Russ deal with PB and have the Commodore do more standard private eye stuff in the end) on it and hopefully finding something that we can use to slander Dooms name and maybe make Deavor wash her hands off that lunatic in turn.
A long shot admittedly, but still something to consider.
Shere Khan
[ ] Expand Cape Suzette Air Power
DC 90
15+24+25+2=66
Critical Failure!
An attempt to improve the quality of Cape Suzette's aeronautical defenses has resulted in catastrophic disaster. While the city's systems were offline and being upgraded, the city was attacked. Though a series of events not entirely clear but almost certainly insanely unlikely, the long-retired air pirates of the Mama Aiuto Gang regrouped for one final pillage, seizing a large portion of the Cape Suzette Treasury in a daring escapade that will enshrine their names forever in aviation history.
[ ] Contact International Buyers
DC 90
69+33+25+3
Critical Success!
Shere Khan has generated considerable interest in his patented fusion technology across the world, paving the way for lucrative deals across the continents. This would be excellent news, if not for...
[ ] Sell fusion power to the US Government
DC 100
12+42+32+4=90
Critical Failure!
In an improbably horrific mailroom accident, documents meant to be provided to the US federal government were instead mailed to the federal government of the brutish and repressive Totalist Republic of Thembria!
Making themselves slightly distinct from the equally totalitarian nation of Brutopia following a branding putsch, Thembira is known as a rogue state which considers the end of the Cold War to be more of a suggestion than fact. As you might imagine, this is a publicity nightmare for Shere Khan, and has Washington looking very sharply in the tiger's direction.
Suffice to say, some people have been fired.
[ ]: ???
DC 100
36+26+30+3=95
Critical Failure!
Something Shere Khan was attempting in secret has failed disasterously!
Ouch....out of all the Kings to apparently get slammed hardest by our Inator (we admittedly still have a Part 2 to wait for, but still...) it had to be one of the more reasonable ones that we still have make formal contact with...that sucks hard.
Maybe we could Reach Out to him next turn to help the tiger out a bit (and maybe grab a favourable Power Supplying deal in the process)? Especially since we still have to see, how friggin Bellwether had been dealing with this turn - for all we know she manage to land a huge PR stab against him in turn...I´d rather not have her capitalize someone like her on SK tumbling a bit.
[ ] Continue Improving Reactor Safety
DC 110
97+23+39+20+5=184
Critical Success!
Eager to avoid anything with even a whiff of the disastrous history of Flubber and the lesser but still concerning tale of nuclear power, Shere Khan has been hard at work developing a series of improved and increased safety measures, with failsafes upon failsafes ensuring meltdown is all but impossible.
At least SK managed to clamp down HARD on any possible security concerns for his fusion tech...am happy for him (and also indirectly anyone buying from him, possibly including ourselves)
Neisenberg
[ ] Distribute Primal
DC 100
59+31+15+20+50 (???)=175
The West Coast has seen sporadic cases of a new illicit substance stalking the streets, distributed by a shady figure referring to himself as 'Neisenberg'. The substance, deemed 'Primal' on the street, is an extremely pure purple crystalline substance that causes lowered inhibitions and increased aggression, making it a favorite of gangs in the region.
Great...*another* combat drug (that from the name and effect MIGHT be a crystallized offshot of Nighthowler extract of all things) being peddle on the street.
That being said, considering that it doesn´t seem to induce any super powers, I don´t think that the Middleton/Wasteland Cartel got its hand in that pot as well at least development-wise, so that´s that.
Toffee
[ ] Hunt for Star
DC 170
1+50+22=73
Critical Failure!
To be Continued in Interlude: Hate
*maniacally gleeful laughter*
I know that A) it would have been a Nat Crit-Fail anyway and B) Toffee would have needed a friggin 98 to succeed (which makes me wonder what his Negaverse players were thinking in going for that option of all things), but it´s still great that that omnicidal wizard lizard completly shat the bed we have an EXPLICIT vested interest in him failing at...really wanna Hunt for Star ourselves now to give both Toffee and Demona (remember, she´ll be trying to nab Star herself) the middle finger to really rub some salt in the wound.
???
[ ] Attack Seth Supplies Co
DC 170/200
43+71+48+50+4=216
Critical Success!
Several Seth Supplies Co factories were found burned to the ground in a stunning act of violent sabotage. The perpetrator, motive and death count remains unknown.
...That one is a subsidiary of Toffee, right? In that case SUCK IT, you asshole.
Oh yeah, that lizard is not having a good time right now, which is good for us and also David at least, since to Doofs knowledge DEI and XI are the only two Kingships who are fully aware of Toffees misanthropic plans - meaning that now anyone on Team Anti-Toffee can bolster their defenses in that regard.
[ ] make money off Vegas
DC 170
26+23+29=78
Critical Failure!
Who wins the pot instead?
1. Mark Beaks
2. Bugs & Daffy
3. Hans Rotwood
4. Fiddleford Hadron McGucket
5. Duff Killigan
6. Dennis the Duck
1d6=2
To be continued in Interlude: Put it All on 23
We already know about "Rat Country" thanks to acing both our Vegas-related actions, so I am not going into Deavors angle on top of it.
As for her other option, she never had a chance at winning here, so I don´t give a damn...although Bugs&Daffy winning the pot instead makes me happy for those two Titans of the Toon Age (I wouldn´t have minded *Dennis the Duck* winning either though, since that might have spilled over into our pockets in some form)
ENCOM
[ ] Develop ICE countermeasures
DC 110
100+75+33+46+11=265
Critical Success!
ENCOM has announced the development of new security tools, known as Intrusion Countermeasures Electronics, or ICE. These programs are designed to detect and halt criminal user activity, particularly attempts to hack or damage ENCOM systems, and halt them before they can occur. ICE promises to be a new frontier in the realm of cybersecurity.
[ ] ???
DC 130
65+18+27=110
Critical Failure!
Something ENCOM attempted in secret has failed disasterously!
[ ] Upgrade ENCOM Legacy security
DC 130
28+58+25+20+6=137
Critical Success!
Via a combination of ICE security and broader packages, ENCOM legacy has successfully positioned itself as the most secure system on the market today. This, unfortunately, has eaten into the market share of the floundering DoofOS.
Damn, aside from that mystery failure ENCOM really is on a roll regarding conquering cyberspace.
Yeah, with all that happening we might have to outright cancel DoofOS and let Alan cook up something better from whole cloth - although we also should give Users of DoofOS opportunity to seamlessly transition to the new OS in order to mitigate our looses in that sector as much as possible.
Negaduck
[ ] Commit Multi-Level Marketing
DC 90
67+17+32+3=119
Critical Success!
Strange news from the West Coast over the weekend as notorious super-criminal Negaduck and his terrifying ally Liquidator were seen approaching several homes. Surprisingly, not one of the victims were harmed, instead reporting that Negaduck urged them to participate in his 'new company' selling Negaduck-branded bottled water. Every single person approached fearfully agreed to buy in, selling the products to their friends and neighbors. When one victim worked up the courage to ask why Negaduck was doing this, he responded by saying that multi-level marketing was the evilest thing he could think of. Also he needed some quick cash, and didn't feel like a robbery today.
The water was later tested and revealed to be perfectly ordinary bottled water, though knowing Negaduck it might've been from Nestle. Apparently people were paying for the brand.
...Negaduck and Liquidator are going from house to house and selling (at least seemingly) perfectly ordinary bottled water?
Color me confused beyond all reason...although it might be an updated version of the scheme that got Liquidator his aquatic powers, all things considered.
[ ] Obtain Cape Suzette Crop Dusting
DC 140
89+34+19+30 (Cape Suzette Chaos)=172
Critical Success!
Negaduck attacked Cape Suzette during the ongoing chaos and managed to seize a dozen of the crop dusters fertilizing the Cape's farmlands, flying off into the sunset with them. This is deeply concerning considering he apparently only had five accomplices with him.
No one knows why.
...*What the fuck is ND planning?*
I´ve got no fucking clue here, guys...although that "FIVE accomplices" makes me worry that the Fearsome Five have become the Sadistic Six as of now...if so, who is the newcomer? Depending on whether QMs are aware of background knowledge from the Darkwing Duck cartoon show, it might be Splatter Phoenix - after all, the main guy behind that show has stated that he regrets making ND the leader of the Fearsome Five because of his tendencies to steal their thunder and that wich that knowledge, he´d now make Splatter Phoenix the boss insteand...so having her join the team and having them become the Sadistic Six would be a nice Mythology Gag
Quest: [ ] The Calistota Chainsaw Massacre
To be continued...
...Ok
@Made in Heaven , please clarify if that is a quest FOR ND or one FOR US.
If it´s one for us and we have to bail out Max, I´d say that we should make Wile E. Coyote quest leader again, because he has proven himself as surprisingly cable in that role. Additionally, out of all our Toon operatives, he comes closest to NDs aptitude for mayhem and violence while still being comparetively heroic now.
As for the rest of the team, normally I´d have picked Hego because I´d say that he´d benefit from his "Glory Daze" trait against a villain like ND, but thanks to the "Ego" Interlude going only so-so, Hego can only Train this turn, whick honestly sucks.
Aside from those two, MAYBE either Norm or Genghis Khan? They´d bring some serious fire power against ND at least.
Any ideas, guys?
GalFed
[ ] Desperately request help from your superiors
DC 60
63+19= 82
Critical Success!
Someone has taken an interest.
Could go either way, depending on what the request for help was about and who has taken an interest as well as HOW.
Mark Beaks
[ ] Release Waddle
DC 110
22+29+33+30 (DoofOS Failure)+4=118
Critical Success!
To be continued in Interlude: I'm Waddle, I'm a Doofus
On top of ENCOM rolling over everything we threw at them, that sucks.
On the other hand, "Not-Zuckerberg" releasing Waddle just now *indirectly saved Bonkers´ bacon* flavour-wise, so it´s not all bad, remember?
Doof: "I broke probability."
Xanatos: internal screaming
Also Xanatos: Gets a critical success on everything
It´s a XANATOS who was FOREWARNED...that was to be expected.
Normally the 'secret failures' would be invisible, but we put them in just so you wouldn't see everyone succeeding on a lot of stuff and barely failing on anything.
Thank you very much, because otherwise some people would throw a hissy fit about "everybody else always winning and only us getting slammed" because they just don´t get, that the Rival Reports are a snap-shot that shows only a part of what´s actually happening...which annoys me to no end, quite frankly.
Girl Talk
"So, that's what's been going on in my life, how about yours?"
"God, where to even start? So, every since my dad took over the Tri-state area he's been trying to get me to work at his company, and 'learn the ropes' but I'm not even sure I want to, you know?" Vanessa explained, lounging in her armchair at her mom's house. "I thought about Applying to an OWCA internship a few years back, This guy I was dating? Monty Monogram? His dad ran the agency. But well, My dad ended up conquering the agency completely and putting them under his iron thumb and even though he openly puts Evil on his logo and in his Jingle and literally took over the entire Tri-state area and runs it like a secret shadow dictator, my mom doesn't seem to care at all! He's even got a government agent
working for him! I... It bothers me, okay? So I kind of just... gave up on busting him."
"You gave up?" Candace asked, astonished.
"I did, yeah," Vanessa admitted. "Because, it didn't seem to matter. Nothing I did mattered. I was just sort of, Dr. Doofenshmirtz's daughter. Honestly it's ruining my life. I have some friends from before my dad got famous? Dana, Lacie, Heather, Birgitte, You, but well... Lacie's Dating my Ex boyfriend Johnny, and Brigitte had to go back to France, and Dana and Heather really don't get what the problem is
at all. One of my Dad's employees, Janna isn't
too bad? But she's still more someone who works for my dad than
my friend, you know? It's like no matter my intent, the entire course of my life feels preordained, and no matter how hard I try to fight it it's going to happen whether I want it to or not."
Candace moaned and placed her head in her hands. "I hear you. Boy do I hear you. As soon as school is out? it doesn't matter if it's summer vacation, or winter vacation, or even just a three day weekend. That's me. That's my entire life. Fated to fail no matter what I do. The boys do something stupidly dangerous, and I try to bust them, and I fail. Honestly, them interning for your dad has kind of cut down on their mania. At least with DEI I know there's a competent adult watching them."
The expression that crossed Vanessa's face was difficult to describe, but bore a distinct resemblance to a combination of horrified shock and hysterical disbelief as she struggled for the self-control not to tell her friend what really went on at DEI and thus stress her out even further.
"I.... definitely get you Candace." Vanessa ended up settling on as a response. "I just want to get out from under my dad's shadow. Did you know magic is real?"
Candace snorted. "Do I know- Of course I know magic is real Vanessa. Every single day of summer some mysterious force magically vanishes my brothers inventions in increasingly bizarre and nonsensical ways that defy both the bounds of physics and logic. What else could it be but Magic?"
Vanessa nodded. Somehow she'd never really connected Candace's stories to the idea that magic could be real. Deep down she always just sort of assumed that OWCA agents were thwarting them or pressing the self destruct buttons on their inventions, but... magic did fit the narrative Candace described a whole lot better than OWCA.
"Right, so Magic is real, and there's this whole underground market selling weird Magical tchotchkes beneath Grand Central in New York City. Me, and my Dad, and Janna, that employee of my dad's I mentioned earlier, ended up having to fight off these three evil witches from like, civil war times? And their army of Zombies," Vanessa explained.
"You know, I had a really weird dream the other day that we had to fight off an army of zombie clones of your dad. The dream didn't really make much sense, and I woke up before I could see how it ended..."
Vanessa laughed. "See, that's why you're the only one I can really talk about this kind of stuff with. Everyone else either doesn't get it or works for my dad; but you? I say "I fought an army of zombies through the streets of New York and you don't even blink."
"I mean, everything turned out fine right? With no real lasting consequences?" Candace prompted.
"Well, I can't really listen to the song 'Thriller' anymore without getting expositional flashbacks to my own backstory, but... otherwise, yeah?"
"What makes backstory flashbacks different from normal flashbacks?"
"Well, according to my dad, and he would know, It's not backstory unless the flashback contains some sort of trauma that helped shape who you are. Everything else is just regular expositional flashback."
"So my flashbacks to all the weird inventions that Phineas and Ferb built where I tried to stop them only to be continually thwarted in my goals?"
"Probably Backstory," Vanessa decided after thinking it over a bit. "But only because of the repeated failures. If you were having fun with them they'd be normal flashbacks."
Candace nodded. "That makes sense."
They sat in comfortable silence for almost half a minute before Candace spoke up again.
"So, how are you dealing with all of that?"
Vanessa frowned. "I don't know that I am? Like, my dad has a therapist on call, but he's also a Supervillain with a TV for a Face who is employed by an evil scientists so..."
"You're not sure he gives good advice?" Candace prompted.
"No, no that's not it. TECHNOR's very particular about making sure that he keeps his supervillainy and psychoanalysis separate. It's that I'm not sure since he works for my dad if Doctor Patient confidentiality applies. I have a lot of things to say, and I don't really want my dad hearing them? He might get the wrong idea."
"I'd give you the number of the therapist my mom sent me to after last summer, but... well I'm pretty sure you already know her since her name is Charlene Doofenshmirtz."
Vanessa's face puckered in distaste. "Yeah, no thanks. I don't really want to talk to my mom about this stuff either." Vanessa paused. "I'm fine. I talked to someone in San Fransokyo about it and she helped me get my head on straight. I'm not sure what I want to do yet, but... I'm figuring things out."
"So you're gonna be okay?" Candace asked, hopefully.
Vanessa's countenance firmed as she came to a realization. "You know what? Yeah. I think I am."
...Damn, Candace and ESPECIALLY Vanessa feeling like they got no choice in life but to fail really hurts, considering the fact that we as Doof don´t have any INTENTION to make them that miserably even indirectly...Really wanna make it up to them now.
