What's the math on the DoofOS with PA again? I still prefer Dinopark and Company Retreat but if CJ's investigation and Ludivine's Tutoring can boost it to a 90% chance I could be persuaded.
Alan's Stewardship - Effective 51 for this roll. Doof's Stewardship - 24.
1d100 + (51 + 24) against DC 125. That's a 50% CoS. Add in XP, that's a 60% CoS. Rolled twice, you calculate the odds of not rolling that at least once by multiplying 40% by 40%, subtract that from 1, and you get 0.84, or 84%. I have been told that I was actually underestimating that, but to my understanding the way that worked would mean that it would round up to 85% from 84.79%.

Edit: The boosts would have to boost the base roll up by a total of 9 points for a total CoS of 90.39%.
 
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Alan's Stewardship - Effective 51 for this roll. Doof's Stewardship - 24.
1d100 + (51 + 24) against DC 125. That's a 50% CoS. Add in XP, that's a 60% CoS. Rolled twice, you calculate the odds of not rolling that at least once by multiplying 40% by 40%, subtract that from 1, and you get 0.84, or 84%. I have been told that I was actually underestimating that, but to my understanding the way that worked would mean that it would round up to 85% from 84.79%.

Edit: The boosts would have to boost the base roll up by a total of 9 points for a total CoS of 90.39%.
Additionally, since we have no reason to be sure that the investigation PA would have synergy, we could use Chat with the Bossman instead, to grant an additional +2, which might be good depending on what the action to tell Princess Coffee Java to investigate actually *does*.
 
Additionally, since we have no reason to be sure that the investigation PA would have synergy, we could use Chat with the Bossman instead, to grant an additional +2, which might be good depending on what the action to tell Princess Coffee Java to investigate actually *does*.
Don't stat changes/things like that only take effect the turn after?

Edit: word from discord says yes
 
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I think we were planning last time for Jumba to do a Dinosaur action, which is great :3. Also anything Flubber-related is currently a baaaaad option due to the incredibly low opinion from the populace thanks to Doom's PR.
 
I think we were planning last time for Jumba to do a Dinosaur action, which is great :3. Also anything Flubber-related is currently a baaaaad option due to the incredibly low opinion from the populace thanks to Doom's PR.
Well, honestly, it seems like a good idea to research superpowers, GM Crops, or genetic disorders, right? Superpowers would be really useful on a crit, and the DC will be low because it was 'greatly reduced' from 120, while GM crops will help with food, and genetic diseases might help with PR. And yeah, we're not planning on going for Flubber, we're just saying that if Ludivine gets redirected to something to do with Flubber, which is very unlikely, she'll almost certainly critically succeed, meaning it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world.

Also, on other notes, does anyone else have suggestions for what to do? Right now, my understanding is that we're definitely for sure doing the retreat, and having Doof use 3 personal actions to give Bradley a reroll on shoring up defenses, and another on having Princess CJ investigate the source. We're also putting Malisfmertz on the Crystal Key for sure. Anything else that's locked in?

EDIT: A compelling argument for not doing superpowers- assuming the DC has been reduced by 40, down to 80, we could get a crit by using Jumba fairly reliably without the use of this Inator. Thus, we shouldn't try for superpowers this turn.
 
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Well, honestly, it seems like a good idea to research superpowers, GM Crops, or genetic disorders, right? Superpowers would be really useful on a crit, and the DC will be low because it was 'greatly reduced' from 120, while GM crops will help with food, and genetic diseases might help with PR. And yeah, we're not planning on going for Flubber, we're just saying that if Ludivine gets redirected to something to do with Flubber, which is very unlikely, she'll almost certainly critically succeed, meaning it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world.

Also, on other notes, does anyone else have suggestions for what to do? Right now, my understanding is that we're definitely for sure doing the retreat, and having Doof use 3 personal actions to give Bradley a reroll on shoring up defenses, and another on having Princess CJ investigate the source. We're also putting Malisfmertz on the Crystal Key for sure. Anything else that's locked in?
Russ likely has a nemesis action.

I'm in favor of sending Tobe on a low DC intrigue action to get him involved in the Retreat. I just see it as an economical and funny thing to do.
 
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So, I was rereading stuff to catch up on details, and, uh... LOVE MUFFIN isn't a learning action? What? It's just free action economy? If we were discussing using Ludivine to boost someone, how about them? It feels like boosting their Learning would be really handy, if we want to keep them around and being useful. We could also use them this turn for something with a low-ish DC, since they have 51 learning, which isn't... bad.

Personally, I'd say we should put them on vehicles, since a crit fail on that seems unlikely to destroy the thing in question, unlike Silphium. And maybe we could assign Coyote to that? If they crit succeed, it's pretty good, and if they crit fail, maybe they'll realize they aren't that great.
 
Say should we give love muffin a lair to make our relationship better?

Hopefully sometime in the future we can sic Von Drake to improve their learning so they might get more "important" task for their pride.
 
We need to use all the various personal actions that could help Lovemuffin. We got a rather direct warning that they aren't happy and might leave us and maybe even damage stuff on their way out.

Psychoanalyze, jumba and drakes personal actions, maybe Janus's personal though that's not clearly a Lovemuffin one.

It's a free action. We do not want to lose them.

Also Kat has successfully sabotaged us twice now though we don't know the results yet. We need to address him and the only action we have that might do it is investigating employees.

Critting on that would be great this turn. If we hire the dickenses to do it it would probably help show them we aren't really evil and perhaps influence them to join permanently.
 
Also Kat has successfully sabotaged us twice now though we don't know the results yet. We need to address him and the only action we have that might do it is investigating employees.
Maybe have Coyote build more traps with Doof can catch him also? His nemesis in the show was a normal kid unlike the super builders in our town. Or somehow make Candace take action against him?
 
Maybe have Coyote build more traps with Doof can catch him also? His nemesis in the show was a normal kid unlike the super builders in our town. Or somehow make Candace take action against him?
Having Coyote build traps might help against the Blot also. About time we did this I'd say.
Yeah, but let's not use this turn- I don't think crits on those traps are as important as some other things.

EDIT:
I am, as a matter of fact, wondering if this is the Longinus.
By the way, nice call!
 
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You want the crazy bitch to murder the entire human race for everything SHE ever did wrong? You're a special kind of stupid aren't ya?
You know the earth is kinda in a bad condition like its bad enough for the normal creatures then there is the mystic side that has been constantly pushed by the hunts clan and these gargoyls are people
 
You know the earth is kinda in a bad condition like its bad enough for the normal creatures then there is the mystic side that has been constantly pushed by the hunts clan and these gargoyls are people
Yes they are, that doesn't mean Demona isn't a monster that needs to be put down. All of her goals would actively make the situation much, much worse. When you said you wanted her to win in this situation it's like saying you wanted Hitler to win, they're both genocidal maniacs.
 
[ ] Improve Recycling Programs
DC 45
A big part of being Greevil is learning to reduce, reuse and recycle. You've already made changes to your personal life by repurposing several of your old Inators, but in order to improve things nationwide you're going to have to give people some guidance on what proper recycling practices are. You've got it! Talking trash cans!
(Rewards: Contributes to overall Greevil image, slightly increases income as processes become more efficient, every third trashcan is given a helpful AI)

I've been thinking, what if we assigned LOVE MUFFIN to this, with XP? They'd have just a 2% chance at failure, and though it'd obviously have a chance at a loyalty malus, we'd never undertake this action under normal circumstances, so this is the best time to do it.

Furthermore, since it'd be a critical success, and the base option already offers AI as a part of the action, it feels like a crit success might even feel somewhat mad sciency for LOVE MUFFIN, enough that I honestly think it's a possibility that they wouldn't take a loyalty hit from it.
 
Yes they are, that doesn't mean Demona isn't a monster that needs to be put down. All of her goals would actively make the situation much, much worse. When you said you wanted her to win in this situation it's like saying you wanted Hitler to win, they're both genocidal maniacs.
She is a genocidal maniac but she is not hitler she has lived over a thousand years watching her whole family/species being killed and driven to extinction by humans a completly seperate species. She had again and again had groups she tried to help and raise like her own children being killed eventually leaving her completly alone in the world thinking herself the last of her species Until the series started i dont know when in the series she "won" but being well kinda "betrayed" by the last known members of her species and her own husband she kinda has gone a little more mad as she has been replaced by a human. And well gargoyls cant really recover there numbers like humans they have what 1 too 3 eggs in there whole lifetime with one mating season before they become infertile
edit: its about understanding what makes her tick its also a bit of bias as we are humans ourself but replace humans with aliens it becomes suddenly diffrent alot of the time in fiction
 
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Except that everything that's happened to her is 100% her fault and her fault alone, but she refuses to acknowledge that she is the source of her own pain. I'd hate her even if she was a human trying to take 'revenge' on another species. She is not and will never be justified in any way shape or form, she wants to kill an entire people for imagined crimes, so yes, she is Gargoyle Hitler.
 
'Tis the Season
'Tis the Season

Aaron Wibright was not the kind of man who read the newspaper over his morning bagel.

Print was a dying artform, of course, drowned out by the internet, and ever-more-sophisticated phone technology, but - that wasn't the reason Aaron didn't read the newspaper. No, the death of the morning rag was just the metaphor as to why he didn't read it.

The City of the Future. San Fransokyo was a town that moved at the speed of technology. Its streets and buildings were a complex circuitry, powered by the pulse of humanity that cycled within, day in, day out. Its sky was shaped with neon signs, the passage of clouds too sluggish, too pedestrian, to hold attention. Superhero and supervillain attacks were single sentences around the office water cooler. The newest, shiniest advances in computational power trampled each other in their mad rush to stay ahead of the pack. Each day was its own racetrack in the rat race, its own maelstrom of circuitry and high demand.

New York, they said, was the city that never slept. But 'Sokyo was the city with one foot in the following morning. A city that outsped even the Earth's rotation, a city quicker to get to tomorrow than even time itself. The City of the Future.

And the problem with everything moving so quickly was that there wasn't enough time to do anything, anymore.

Aaron couldn't slack his stride for anything. Not pets, nor toys. Not friends, nor family. Not a breakfast more substantial than a bagel with cream cheese and lox. Not yoga classes, nor new movie releases, nor art museums, nor even Christmas Day. Not something as small as the sunrise, nor the sunset in turn. Certainly not the morning newspaper.

Not if he wanted to keep pace.

If the daily news really needed to reach him so badly, then it could catch up to Aaron all by itself. After all, nothing and nobody could ever slow this city down.

"Filthy creatures! You cannot kill the Huntsclan. We are more than men, we are an idea. And as long as one of us lives, we will never stop hunting you."

It was Christmas Day, Anno Domini two-thousand and sixteen, and all of San Fransokyo had stopped in its tracks.

Aaron had been walking home from the office, equal parts pride that he'd been one of only three people to volunteer to work the holiday, and rueful dismay that his warm, warm apartment was still six blocks away. He'd been trudging, more than walking, honestly, the freezing wind and sludging snow dragging his frozen feet backwards, but he'd been walking, nevertheless. Always moving forwards, always striving to keep up.

And then he'd caught up.

He was far from the only person who'd done so. The street in front of the store display was crowded, six people to a television or sometimes more, and crowding further still. Statues, each and every one of them, slightly slack-jawed. All huddled together, yet all pressed apart in solitude, each soul uncaring, for the moment, of the biting cold.

Because they weren't really in San Fransokyo anymore, after all. Aaron, and all of them, and all the rest of the world, was in New York, right now.

Aaron was watching. He was watching, as guns and claws and battle cries only a thin hair from something literal, and beyond mere horror, cut through the crowd. He was watching, as humanity was swept aside, replaced only with beasts in human skin. He was watching, as open warfare overtook crowded streets, loomed over fearful eyes. He was watching, as holly wreaths and Christmas lights burst into flames, ignited by passing laser fire.

He'd been watching for twenty minutes, now, unable to tear his eyes away.

Bloody fangs.

Monsters were attacking one of the greatest cities on Earth. Clever wordplay fails to describe the scene further.

Mr. Wilbright stood, alone as the rest of the crowd, unable to comprehend. Unable to fathom. Too fast most days for his thoughts to catch up with him, and now all he could do was think. To wonder. To spiral. To bear witness, and for that witness to be borne upon him. To try and grasp at the truth standing just outside of everything he'd ever known.

"Is this Armageddon?" Aaron murmured, half-forgotten Sunday School lessons, and knew that not a single person in the crowd would bother to answer.

"The Holy Trinity blesses us, brother!"

Mr. Wilbright, paging Mr. Wilbright, you've left your lights on, and also, somebody's stolen your car, Mr. Wilbright -

Mr. Wilbright jumped, breath stuttering in shock, and turned to his right, blinking hard, to see who'd broken tonight's spell.

And.

Oh.

Great.

One of these religious nutjobs; the kind that passed out incomprehensible pamphlets about their ideas of God, or whatever-the-hell. The kind of people that New Age wackos would scoot over on the subway about. Getting more and more common around 'Sokyo; most days you couldn't make it to a corner cafe on your lunch break without having to walk a little faster about things. Probably fancied themselves mild and approachable in their literal red cloaks and one-eyed insignia. Cultist weirdos, the kind you tried your best to just ...

... to just forget about.

No one else sure seemed to be paying the two of them attention, at the moment. Not that Aaron could blame anyone about that; he sure wouldn't be talking to this guy if he hadn't talked to him first. Honestly, it was probably for the best if Aaron pretend he hadn't heard, was just another face in the -

The crowd screamed, on the TV. Something raw, and full of terror.

"...I ain't your brother, mac," Aaron said, not unkindly, turning back to the "show."

"Ah, but look how we've arranged ourselves!" Red-cloak replied, arms spread out, looking without looking, features shadowed by hood. "Gathered around the television set. Searching desperately for a hint of something unreal, something that could make it all better. All of the same mind, all ignoring each other." He chuckled. "What could better describe a family than that?"

Aaron snorted, despite everything. "Alright, ya got me, maybe we are related."

An explosion, a country across, right in front of their faces.

"Perhaps we all are, tonight," Red-cloak said, arms dropping.

"Happy Holidays, bro," Aaron commiserated. Then, after a moment's hesitation: "Merry Christmas."

"And a Happy New Year."

"That, too."

Red-cloak laughed. "Oh, apologies, brother!" he said, "I did not mean it as an admonishment!"

"Spoken like true family," Aaron smirked, a little.

"A wound?" It sounded like Red-Cloak was smirking, too, even if Aaron could not see his face beneath his. "I have just met you, and you already draw me so close?"

Aaron laughed outright. "Not my fault you sounded like my grandma," and wasn't that the reason why he never called. "Seriously. Uncanny."

Red-cloak laughed too. Something low and soft, but musical - the echoing of drums. "These holiday gatherings are the worst, aren't they, brother?"

Aaron kept laughing. "Preach it, man, preach it."

"I need not preach what is self-evident," Red-cloak scoffed, purposely haughty. "One merely need look around."

"We're all terrible!" Aaron half-shouted, all too wild.

"We are," Red-cloak said.

A Gargoyle's wild howl split the air.

"The worst," Aaron said, more quietly.

"We are," Red-cloak said, just as soft. "But that is the point of a family, is it not?"

Aaron looked at him, the question unsaid.

Red-cloak didn't look back. "That we are all terrible together."

And it occurred to Aaron, all of a sudden, that in a desperate attempt to find humanity in a situation where he could see none, he'd been having a very different conversation than the man standing next to him had been.

That he should have been scooting away.

"Right," Aaron said, slowly turning away. "Yeah. Right."

"That is why I came over to meet you," the cultist said. "Mister ...?"

Aaron Wilbright swallowed. "Mr. Packard."

"Brother Packard," the man said, heedless of the rising of Aaron's heartbeat. "I had overheard your distress, you see. I don't know whether you'd meant to ask your question aloud, but ... I couldn't leave you be." Still, still, still, he did not look at him. "Not when I might offer you succor."

Ohhh boy. This was ... this was getting sticky. Probably best to run? Probably best to run. Get outta there ASAP. Only problem was, Aaron couldn't seem to move. Like something had crafted him a mouse, and this conversation a cat's paw.

"I bring you good news, my fellow man," the voice of molasses, dark and slow and drowning, carried onward, heedless. "I bring an answer to your question. You see, when I wished you a Happy New Year, it truly wasn't an admonishment."

"I believe you," Aaron said, not certain of what he was saying. "I'm not ... you don't gotta convince ..."

The camera swerved away at the last possible moment from one of the cloaked figures - the Huntsmen - firing a plasma blast, point-blank, at the back of a Gargoyle's head.

"I meant it as a celebration."

Aaron wanted to throw up.

"This is not an Armageddon, my brother," the pit full of dark continued to say, "No, not an ending at all. Have you not heard the tales? Seen the signs?" A small chuckle. "Watched the Hallmark films?"

"Can't ... say I have."

"Why, it's Christmas, Brother Packard," the voice continued to speak. "The day of birth. The end of an epoch, yes. But more than that -"

The figure breathed in deeply, as though the smoke could fill his lungs from across the United States.

"...a new beginning."

"I'm not -" Aaron stopped all at once, trying to will his question out of existence, trying to make this guy forget, "I ain't never been much a believer, to be honest with -"

"Should we not celebrate?" the man with the evil eye asked. Casually. Almost off-hand. "Should not there be eggnog? Mistletoe? Good will among mankind? Why..." Slowly, he raised his arms, indicating the television, and his hands poked out of his sleeves, the first hint of humanity -

His fingers were blackened, and cracked, and bleeding. Frostbitten almost straight through.

The man in the red robe did not seem to care.

"...have we not received a gift, today, brother?"

There was a wailing, of a baby. Not on the screen, this time. Here, among the crowd. It seemed to snap everyone, everyone there, out of their trance, and they began talking with each other, sound and fear so thorough one might call it a storm.

They, Aaron and the man of pretty words, there at the silent eye.

"What do you want from me, man?" Aaron asked, trying to keep his voice steady. Tears freezing at the corners of his eyes.

"What any teacher wants from their student." Blood froze upon the man's knuckles. "Understanding."

"Then ... I get it, okay?" Aaron ... bargained. Bargained was the right word. "So, just ... I gotta, go, y'know? It's Christmas. I ... I got family, and -"

"I worry," the demon lowered his arms at last. Slow, unbothered, unhurried. "That you do not understand the shape of the Earth."

Aaron laughed, only slightly hysterical. "You're -" he coughed. "You're one of those flat-Earth types? That's what this is all about?!"

"You truly do not understand," came the gentle, patient reply. "I do not speak of the shape of the planet. I speak of the shape of the world."

Oh, God. Oh, God. "Please don't ..." Gunfire echoed from the television, and the baby further cried. "Please. Don't."

"The world is a box," the blood-red darkness crooned. "And our lives are trapped within it, you must understand. Not the breath, and the muscle, and the sinew, no - the soul of us, the real of us, beneath the blood and bone, is something that is given to us from the outside. Wrapped up in a neat little bow."

All Aaron had to do was walk away. Just, leave. Leave and not look back. Put this out of his mind, forever. All he had to do was what he always did, was move, so why couldn't he? Why couldn't he just move?!

"We cannot see within our gift," the hooded man continued, "For that is the nature of the box. Oh, but the truth is so, so much worse - in truth, my brother, we cannot even see the box!" His head shook, as though sorrowed, just the hint of movement beneath the hood. "The gift is so nicely prepared, so neat, so thoughtfully arranged, but only a fool would claim that wrapping paper is what we are meant to receive!"

"What are you talking about?" Aaron asked, despite himself.

"You see these neon signs," the preacher preached. "You see these streets, paved by ingenuity and proper planning. You see the law, the calendar, the rules of polite society. The very laws of physics themselves." The noise of the crowd was still there, but it seemed to vanish, somehow, as the tone of the voice deepened, deepened further still. "These are all wrapping, Brother Packard. It is all pretty, and thoughtful, and may even be enjoyed for a time, but none of that changes that in the end, the wrapping is meant to hide the truth."

"That the world is a box?" Aaron said, trying to wrap his head around all this, if only ... if only so that this "man" might let him go -

"Of course not," the figure scoffed. "The most unthinking dullard can see the shape of what they've been given. A box is a box; paper and ribbon will not hide that." Fire crackled. Blood spilled. "Yet this entire world has convinced itself, despite the shape of things, that wrapping paper is all there is to us."

"I ..." Aaron started, and stumbled. "What are you saying?"

"Gargoyles," the man responded, "Witches. The Loch Ness monster. Aliens and bigfeet and other worlds than these. The arcane and extraordinary, the magical and mysterious." A chuckle, heavy, like the collapse of a circus tent, more the end of the celebration than the cause. "The wings, the talons, the staves, the hunters. The chaos of the city, underneath its long-worn mask." Genuine anger soaked these words - yet all seemed to disappear. All at once. "Tell me. Is there truly no box beneath what people call 'normal'?"

Aaron couldn't say.

He could only stare.

Wings. Claws. Staves. Hunters. Blood.

"But even that is a disguise for the truth, in the end." Almost wistful, now, the words. "The joy. The purpose. The soul of the matter. The greatest gift any person could ever receive. Tell me ... is the point of the gift the ribbon? The wrapping?"

"No," Aaron said, mouth dry.

"Then is it the box? Do we delight in the packaging; is the cardboard what we long for?"

"No."

"So what could it be, then?" the leading question, well. Led. "What is the important thing, here? If not the wrapping, if not the box, then what could it possibly be?"

"The gift," Aaron said, less like a response and more like inevitable gravity.

"The gift," the prophet repeated the message. "Indeed, the gift. The fulfillment of the promise. The font of joy. The truth within the truth. The ceasing of rules and boundaries, such as expectation or responsibility or time itself, and the end result! Freedom! Joy! Purpose! And further freedom still!"

Icy air passed from beneath the figure's hood in a cloud. Aaron watched it dissipate, slowly, backlit by open war, in the evening air.

"But how can we obtain our present?" the words moved quickly, for all that they were said slow. As though separated in time from every moment that ever came before, or after. "What cause have we to call this a new beginning?"

The man in the red robe turned to him, at long last. Slowly, yet all at once somehow, like the first overnight snowfall, and yourself waking up to it. No threat, but no warning, just a seeming-sudden change.

"You must ... unwrap your gift." Silken. Smooth. Calm as anything. "You must open the box."

Plagues of locusts. Guillotines and gravestones. The spread of fire, and cities screaming in pain. Scissors, and boxcutters. The man in red stared with bloodshot eyes, that look he held in them even louder than his words.

"And brother, after it is all said and done, and you have received your blessing?"

And his smile? Wide, dimpled, genuine, perfect teeth? Oh, louder yet.

"Why, what else is there left to do ... but be thankful?"

It was nothing more than the smile - the simple, eager, joyful smile - of the child on Christmas morning.
 
An Ode to the Coming War
Tic toc.

Tic toc.

Tic toc.

Tic toc.

Tic toc.

Goes the clock.

Counting down.

Now don't you frown.

Soon there'll be.

Plain to see.

Death for you.

And a choice for me.

Tic toc.

Tic toc.

Tic toc.

Tic toc.
 
I am not exactly sure what I just read. is Red-Cloak recruiting for the huntsclan? Sounds like he might be, but it's not definite.

An Ode to the Coming War
Tic toc.

Tic toc.

Tic toc.

Tic toc.

Tic toc.
I'm reminded of a certain very bad end from a certain Hearts of Iron IV mod. Let's hope to god that any failure to VERIFY YOUR CLOCK doesn't end in such devastation.

 
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