I'm really not worried about this. They're throwing lavish parties anyhow. I think your speculation on this causing a lasting culture issue is wrong.
The bolded is explicitly wrong here.
The elites were complaining that the infantry were receiving all the support and they wanted more chariots for their sons to ride around on instead of doing other things and absorbing large amounts of luxuries.
The nobles were unhappy because their children had nothing to do so spent the wealth allocated to them for the purchase and maintenance of chariots on ridiculous extravagances instead.
Chariots could only be comissioned by the state.
Similarly, I'm not concerned about a Glassworks significantly increasing the power of the guilds (and I'm a guild-hater.) Or us getting Leading in a good significantly increasing the power of the traders. Those are both fairly necessary things for us to do as we pre-industrialize.
The temple is a BIT concerning... which is probably why it has so high a cost. On the flip side though, the priests were really wanting forests, and their agenda is basically "be listened to". And we're making a ton of forests! MAAAAYBE they'll tone down the penalty some.
So, while we're at it, another look at the quests:
Patricians -
Objective: Build Chariots within 2 turns. Success: +1 Culture, Failure: -5 Wealth
If we succeed:
-Idle noble scions will be kept occupied in the military elite.
-Patricians slightly strengthened by improving odds of their family performing well in chariot races at the Games.
-Happy patricians invest into the arts independently.
If we fail:
-Idle noble scions will spend their chariot budget on something else instead
--Said scions will find something else to waste their money on. If we're lucky and have the alternative facilities in place, they may redirect to productive endeavors to excel(after all, rich, idle nobles were a cause for the advancement of the arts and sciences...with the right social infrastructure). If we're unlucky, they will self justify the pursuit of idleness and excess as a goal in itself.
Overall, meeting it is harmless, failing it can be very harmful or beneficial.
Guild -
Objective: Build Glasswords within 3 turns. Success: +1 Tech & Culture, Failure: -3 Tech
If we succeed:
-The Glassblowers, Jewelers and Alchemists(and all their forks like soapers, dyers, etc) will be strengthened.
-The overall Guilds power will be slightly strengthened.
-Increased glass goods strenghtens the Traders.
If we fail:
-Brain drain as the alchemists needing more glass cannot get any.
Overall, meeting it is great. Failing it is nasty
Traders -
Objective: Obtain Leading status or better in a new trade good within 3 turns. Failure: -1 Stability
If we succeed:
-The overall Traders power will be strengthened.
If we fail:
-The Traders throw a tantrum.
Yeomen- Objective: Obtain a new province and have 50% or greater trails coverage within 2 turns. Success: +1 Stability
If we succeed:
-Patricians significantly strengthened by adding a new province, new land, which means new posts and titles.
-Yeomen happy at being able to farm more.
-More land, more actions, more things needed to fortify and road.
If we fail:
-Nothing happens.
Priests-
Objective: Build a Level 2 Temple within 3 turns. Failure: -1 Legitimacy
If we succeed:
-Priests significantly strengthened in status
-Religious authority bolsters ability to convert neighbors and dominate in pilgrimage.
-Possible L2 temple facilities unlocked.
-Still behind the Khemetri's L3 Temple.
If we fail:
-Priests denounce the King for disrespecting the gods.
we literally can't do it until we're below the martial cap
We'd be below the cap. We're raising a mercenary company out of the current best charioteers into Dragon Company. We need to replenish the chariots anyway.
No, this is wrong. Charioteers were hereditary elite patricians through most of the late bronze age because it's an incredibly specialized job with incredibly expensive equipment. And they want the crown to buy them some more super expensive equipment so more of their children can be trained up as charioteers.
Basically this.
Lets go through this one at a time. The first new question we need to ask when developing a new tech is what happens if/when our neighbors get it? For example, lets say we have a chance to easily push the Siege tech tree. If so, I would suggest MAJOR CAUTION in doing so, because our neighbors getting siege tech really hurts us, past what we would expect from an average tech. Similarly, if we were only now developing cavalry, I would suggest similar caution, because that tech bleeding to the nomads leads to massive headaches at a minimum.
In this case, partially true.
Rams, for instance, are hideously inefficient for Bronze civilizations to use. They can't mobilize them easily enough to use on a large scale. They are effective for Iron civilizations...provided they have a body of skilled smiths to figure the design out anyways.
But if we switch to ballistas and stone throwers they are then hugely outdated again. And whoever tries to copy ballistas would need to develop an expert body of engineers and mechanicists to copy it.
Cavalry...we've seen the Nomads do this throughout history, so yeah.
Though they're already mounted as well I would not be very surprised if they beat us there. Disappointed, but not surprised.
Second, I don't get the argument that a larger power can exploit techs better. Why would that be? A larger power certainly has more resources to throw at exploiting techs, but they also have more population to sere with said techs. It balances out to the same work per person.
Economies of scale. A big chunk of our techs are outright useless to a smaller polity, and only really usable at all if you are at Thunder Horse or Khemetri sizes. Another chunk requires resources specific to certain biomes, or the skill and knowledge infrastructure to copy it.
Take the Sacred Warding here, anyone can see it and try to copy it, but only the Khemetri have a decent chance of pulling it off without fucking it up. It takes a large priesthood devoted to scholastic pursuits to imitate.
Or take the volley archery, anyone could copy it, but they don't have the social foundation of large numbers of militia archers with an obssession towards perfectionism trying to perfect their shot, or the cultural attitudes towards unity to synchronize effectively.
Third, I don't think our tech absorption is good enough to do with tech what the Trelli did with trade. Trelli's deal wasn't just that they had advanced trade traits (which they do), but also that they controlled a trade route that their neighbors all needed to use.
And yet, when we got a direct route to the Khemetri, the trade still flowed through the Trelli, because they are the faster channel.
The same principle applies here with techs. Whoever in the region gets a shiny, we get it, then people copy it off us.
But we have the traits that make reverse engineering foreign ideas fast and effective, while they don't.