Remove ads

Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest

Reader mode
RandomOTP said:
[x] Action Plan: Discuss and Do


Sorry for the delay and general lack of activity, chronic migraines suck. But as long as we take Keiko, I'd be okay with this. Keiko's a messianic figure that would hold an amount of influence over them that Hazou could never reach... also, this idea is one that I didn't realize I wanted until I read it. We should also bring Yuno as a sort of "fuck you" to the Isan traditionalists who scorned her. I mean, she's marrying Noburi, Toad Summoner, brother to the Pangolin Summoner, and son of Jiraiya, whom Isan views as an Asura, if I'm remembering the Yuno chapter correctly.

Though I'd like to wait until after their wedding ceremony, just in case some Isan people try and use the couple's "unmarried" status against Yuno. I mean, they'll still probably say something like "it was a barbaric ceremony and doesn't count." But as long as we can make the wedding ceremony follow enough Isan-traditions that it counts/matters in Yuno's heart, then it'll give her the strength to fight back against those accusations. Some of us-the-hivemind might not necessarily care about ceremony, or need a wedding ceremony to feel "established," but Yuno (as liberal as she is for someone raised in Isan) is a little more traditional.

(also, we should bring Yuno on the off chance we end up burning Isan to the ground. Then we'll really get mileage about of that quote "a child not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth.")
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

Again, she wasn't exactly "scorned". She was designated a sin-eater. That's not necessarily a lesser social position, sometimes quite the opposite, just very much other.


Oneiros said:
I kinda thought she would just do basic logistical work/security. Say the Hags came to fuck shit up Yuno would be there with her ax
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

It might not be wise to leave security up to the isolated child whose only friend and confidant has been an axe barely containing hundreds of years of a whole community's concentrated evil...
 
Last edited:
Lailoken said:
Again, she wasn't exactly "scorned". She was designated a sin-eater. That's not necessarily a lesser social position, sometimes quite the opposite, just very much other.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
The line was more intended as a joke, but I'd argue that, regardless of Yuno's designated rung on Isan's social latter, there's still the fact that she definitely wasn't treated well by most of Isan's inhabitants.

That said, what's this about Yuno and being a sin-eater? I think I must've missed that info-drop, all I can recall is that Yuno was ostracized by Isan and that most Isanites distanced themselves from her. I know there's something weird going on with Yuno's axe, but that's mostly derived from her anthropomorphizing it (which, given chakra-weirdness, might not be all that strange). If you don't mind, could you link to the associated deduction/info drop?
 
RandomOTP said:
The line was more intended as a joke, but I'd argue that, regardless of Yuno's designated rung on Isan's social latter, there's still the fact that she definitely wasn't treated well by most of Isan's inhabitants.

That said, what's this about Yuno and being a sin-eater? I think I must've missed that info-drop, all I can recall is that Yuno was ostracized by Isan and that most Isanites distanced themselves from her. I know there's something weird going on with Yuno's axe, but that's mostly derived from her anthropomorphizing it (which, given chakra-weirdness, might not be all that strange). If you don't mind, could you link to the associated deduction/info drop?
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
Velorien said:
"Say, Yuno," he asked in his most casual voice, admiring the view of the nearby forest, and trying to pretend that the two Kannagi minders (who had not been chosen for their stealth skills) weren't there, "you mentioned you're adopted, right?"

"Yes," Yuno said without inflection. "I was born a Gasai."

"Where I come from, people only adopt children when there's no one left in their original family who can look after them." This wasn't strictly true, but it was close enough. "But since the Gasai are a very big family, I assume that's not how it works here?"

"My case was unusual," Yuno explained. "My mother left us when I was little. She had a sickness."

After a moment's pause to remember, Noburi touched his hand to his heart in the condolence sign which roughly meant "I pray that your loved one's misfortune does not stay behind to trouble your family".

Yuno gave the slightly sideways nod which indicated grateful acceptance. Noburi felt a flicker of pride. They were getting better and better at communicating in each other's language.

"The tensions between the Kannagi and the Gasai were getting worse, and it was decided that my father would marry a Kannagi woman in order to create an alliance and avoid bloodshed. But that's not what happened."

Noburi looked at her questioningly.

"There was an… incident," Yuno said softly.

"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to," Noburi said, inviting elaboration while establishing his own trustworthiness by showing respect (Inoue-sensei had coached him on getting the tone of voice just right).

Yuno looked up at him, holding his gaze for all of the 1.75 seconds they were currently allowed (yes, the matron had told him, it was that exact).

"No, if we are to have an… extended acquaintance, I think I want you to know. And besides, I'd rather you hear it from me than from the others."

She took a deep breath, staring somewhere out into the distance.

"It was a bad year for chakra monsters. There were so many that we had send hunters just to keep the population down. One day, a giant boar turned up near the village, as big as a house, with a hide like iron and tusks like spears, the strongest anyone had ever seen. The elders sent a whole team of hunters to kill him. But they only made things worse. The boar massacred them, and the injuries they gave him sent him on a berserk rampage.

"There were a dozen young kids on the outskirts of the village, doing taijutsu training," she went on, her voice getting lower. "Daddy was there with us. He was teaching us kunai safety. It was our first time using kunai, and everyone was having so much fun.

"Then we heard the screams, and before anyone could do anything, that monster broke through the wall and charged at us like an avalanche.

"Daddy leapt in between us. He used the Spiral Hammer Strike, and it was so strong that it broke the boar's ribs and drove them right into his lungs. But it didn't kill him fast enough."

Noburi could hear Yuno's breathing getting faster, and the tension in her voice rising. He wanted to reach out and do something, reassure her, but at the same time he knew he needed to hear the rest of the story.

"I didn't understand what happened next. One moment, Daddy was there. Then he wasn't. And there was a shower of… of blood and guts. All over me and all over the boar. Guts, and bone, and other things I didn't know. Everywhere. I couldn't see anything but red."

Yuno fell silent. Noburi waited patiently.

"I don't remember anything else about that day," Yuno said eventually, in a calmer tone. "Nobody would tell me at first, but eventually I managed to persuade some of the other kids who'd been there to talk about it. They say I saw my father's kunai holster on the ground. I leaned down, drew a kunai, and then I ran up to the boar and started stabbing his soft underbelly as he thrashed around dying. They say I was still stabbing when the adults arrived, long after it was dead, letting its blood pour over me. They say I was laughing."

Noburi was acutely aware that it would be bad to stare at Yuno in horror right now. He tried to keep his face still.

It didn't matter. Yuno was still looking somewhere far away.

"The marriage was off, but the Kannagi and the Gasai still needed an alliance, and the Gasai didn't have anyone else they could offer for betrothal just then, so they decided to give me to the Kannagi instead.

"The Kannagi weren't happy. They still aren't happy. I've worked harder than anyone to master the Mountain Cleaver Style, but they still whisper about my past, and how I don't fit in, and how I'm a loner who can't be trusted because I don't have strong bonds with anyone in the village."

Her head sharply whipped round to Noburi.

"Have you tried not being a loner when everybody avoids you?" she demanded angrily. "I'm supposed to be a good little girl, and follow all the rules – but that won't stop people calling me cursed, or saying I'm a shame to my family, or spreading horrible rumours many of which aren't even true, or being afraid I'm going to go crazy and attack them or something when I've never seriously hurt anybody! And then somehow I'm supposed to make strong bonds with people when no one will even look me in the eye."
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
 
Thanks @faflec!

Though, I'm not sure that I'd say that Yuno "holds the title of 'sin-eater.'" Rather, it seems more likely that what happened really was was as Yuno described: She blacked out from the shock of seeing her father gored to death, implemented the weapon they were shown how to use moments prior in a violent manner --and violence is something thatis far less shielded from children in the EN --was given away to another clan as a political token, and Isan --as ritualistic and backwards-isolationist as is it --decided that Yuno was an abnormal freak. Yuno then isolated herself from Isan, because --being the child that she was at the time, being called a freak by her peers and social superiors naturally hurt --and then Isan used her isolating herself as further proof that there was something wrong with Yuno.
 
You know, a thought occurs. I wonder if the medical field in the EN is as male-dominated as in our world? Tsunade is practically a one-woman revolution in the medical field and one of the first to spread that knowledge to the four corners of the EN, without regard to national borders. Further, magic is an equalizer in terms of gender dynamics that we don't have --albeit, somewhat limited from Mari's perspective, but most bigots wouldn't be as blatant about their bigotry, if the person they're repressing could shoot lightning out of their eyeballs or something similar. More proof that the ninja-side of MfD is more tolerant than the civilian side? Still, I'd be willing to be that even the dullest bigot wouldn't question dare Tsunade's medical judgement just because of what organs she does/doesn't have.
 
RandomOTP said:
The line was more intended as a joke, but I'd argue that, regardless of Yuno's designated rung on Isan's social latter, there's still the fact that she definitely wasn't treated well by most of Isan's inhabitants.

That said, what's this about Yuno and being a sin-eater? I think I must've missed that info-drop, all I can recall is that Yuno was ostracized by Isan and that most Isanites distanced themselves from her. I know there's something weird going on with Yuno's axe, but that's mostly derived from her anthropomorphizing it (which, given chakra-weirdness, might not be all that strange). If you don't mind, could you link to the associated deduction/info drop?
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

Arghh. I have this pattern-recognition subsystem which occasionally screams warnings at me without explaining itself. Digging out everything which added up to it freaking out is often an effort somewhere between mighty and heroic, but I'll try.

In the meantime, consider that she is some sort of savant with an inherited feature who has a social position high enough to make her a formally valuable adoption pawn while at the same time making her a pariah set apart from everybody else. An important, but distant role to be served. The sort which might cultivate a personality obsessed with every detail of formality, tradition, and ritual, quite possibly as a cumulative survival adaptation against the extraordinary burdens placed upon her.

As I mentioned before, the analogy most widely accessable to a current audience I can think of would be "The Giver", and oh, hey, what's this thing about her seeing colors?


RandomOTP said:
Thanks @faflec!

Though, I'm not sure that I'd say that Yuno "holds the title of 'sin-eater.'" Rather, it seems more likely that what happened really was was as Yuno described: She blacked out from the shock of seeing her father gored to death, implemented the weapon they were shown how to use moments prior in a violent manner --and violence is something thatis far less shielded from children in the EN --was given away to another clan as a political token, and Isan --as ritualistic and backwards-isolationist as is it --decided that Yuno was an abnormal freak. Yuno then isolated herself from Isan, because --being the child that she was at the time, being called a freak by her peers and social superiors naturally hurt --and then Isan used her isolating herself as further proof that there was something wrong with Yuno.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

The first day she ever held a knife she took on a historically dangerous monster and won. We also know that she inherited her eyes from her mother. The girl with a thing about colors in a setting with a thing about eyes.


RandomOTP said:
You know, a thought occurs. I wonder if the medical field in the EN is as male-dominated as in our world? Tsunade is practically a one-woman revolution in the medical field and one of the first to spread that knowledge to the four corners of the EN, without regard to national borders. Further, magic is an equalizer in terms of gender dynamics that we don't have --albeit, somewhat limited from Mari's perspective, but most bigots wouldn't be as blatant about their bigotry, if the person they're repressing could shoot lightning out of their eyeballs or something similar. More proof that the ninja-side of MfD is more tolerant than the civilian side? Still, I'd be willing to be that even the dullest bigot wouldn't question dare Tsunade's medical judgement just because of what organs she does/doesn't have.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

I have a hard time believing that a setting which has only had medicine invented in living memory by a legendary woman warrior who can settle any disagreement by saying "I'm going to flex my aura and make the body of you and everybody in a city block's radius forget that you are capable of breathing long enough to ensure that you never bother me again" has a male-dominated medical field.
 
Last edited:
Lailoken said:
I mentioned before, the analogy most widely accessable to a current audience I can think of would be "The Giver", and oh, hey, what's this thing about her seeing colors?
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

Good points, actually. Huh, that'd actually he pretty cool --and entirely possible, given the possible-existence of Jashin, The Watchers/Wardens, and other chakra weirdness. Let's keep Yuno away from Orochimaru... Just in case.

Lailoken said:
I have a hard time believing that a setting which has only had medicine invented in living memory by a legendary woman warrior who can settle any disagreement by saying "I'm going to flex my aura and make the body of you and everybody in a city block's radius forget that you are capable of breathing long enough to ensure that you never bother me again" has a male-dominated medical field
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
What, no lazer eyes needed? :( (Fair, though)

And I've always pictured MfD's jonin-auras as something that needs to be constantly held back, like sucking in your stomach. The only times Hazou's been exposed to auras have been when the jonin in question has been severely angry and begins to "leak" their aura (Asuma, Itachi) or when they're deliberately letting it out (Mari and Tsunade, Hazou and Orochimaru). But that's just idle speculation.
 
Lailoken said:
I have a hard time believing that a setting which has only had medicine invented in living memory by a legendary woman warrior who can settle any disagreement by saying "I'm going to flex my aura and make the body of you and everybody in a city block's radius forget that you are capable of breathing long enough to ensure that you never bother me again" has a male-dominated medical field.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
This is ponwog (Personal Opinion, Not Word of God) but I'm reasonably confident that I recall it correctly: Medicine has been around forever. Medical ninjutsu has been around for a long time. Tsunade's great innovations were to (A) write down all her medical knowledge and widely disseminate it and (B) train a ton of new medic-nin and order them to train others.
 
I just had the errant, random thought that "Hazou is an alternate Orochimaru, if the sannin had turned left instead of right." I'm about to clock in for work, so I'll poke at the kernal later on, but at first glance it seems to have a glimmer of truth: Hazou's bloodline makes connecting with others difficult (didn't Hazou say at one point that the IN sometimes feels more like a puppet on strings than a person?), Hazou deals with the Ami-problem of being forced to maneuver around/with others who are shortsighted and focused on small, petty whims rather than the big, existential threats that the MfD universe faces on the daily (similarity to Orochimaru's possible frustration in dealing with those who aren't as educated as he is), Hazou's insane determination to change the EN for the better seems to bare superficial similarity to Orochimaru's (canon) quest for immortality (Hazou is more focused on humanity's/civilization's Uplift and Immortality, rather than a more personal immortality).

Note: Not saying we should go and hug Orochimaru, I was just speculating on the possible parallels between Hazou's narrative character and Orochimaru. This is a rough idea, but even if we take this as gospel truth (and we shouldn't) then that's yet another reason to avoid Orochimaru; even the most well-adjusted people wouldn't relish in seeing a morally-superior foil to themselves, and Orochimaru isn't well adjusted.
 
I prefer to express tokens of friendship towards the Neutral Evil/Chaotic Neutral mad scientist by handing him useful scientific things that don't stray out of our ethical boundaries.
 
MMKII said:
I prefer to express tokens of friendship towards the Neutral Evil/Chaotic Neutral mad scientist by handing him useful scientific things that don't stray out of our ethical boundaries.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
Just gonna chime in and repeat my support for sending Orochimaru a letter offering to let ourselves be vivisected provided no permanent damage is done. As I've expounded on before, I firmly believe this is both the most productive and also safest course of action we can take with respect to him.
 
RandomOTP said:
Good points, actually. Huh, that'd actually he pretty cool --and entirely possible, given the possible-existence of Jashin, The Watchers/Wardens, and other chakra weirdness. Let's keep Yuno away from Orochimaru... Just in case.


What, no lazer eyes needed? :( (Fair, though)

And I've always pictured MfD's jonin-auras as something that needs to be constantly held back, like sucking in your stomach. The only times Hazou's been exposed to auras have been when the jonin in question has been severely angry and begins to "leak" their aura (Asuma, Itachi) or when they're deliberately letting it out (Mari and Tsunade, Hazou and Orochimaru). But that's just idle speculation.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

Basically, some community role which is simultaneously very important, but also separates her. It obviously wasn't authoritative, which primarily leaves sacrificial. It also appears to have a hereditary component.

Like, people use the word "scapegoat", but raising escape goats was difficult and painful. You had to find an appropriately flawless kid, raise it with constant care to keep it flawless, then take this living thing which loves you as a parent out to the rock in front of everybody you have ever met, look it in the eye, and slit its throat. There's a reason that anybody who possibly can emotionally distances themselves from the goat whenever they can.

Hey, what happened to Yuno's mother she inherited her eyes from? Oh, right, she died of an unspecified illness when she was very young after giving birth to a successor. Probably unrelated.


RandomOTP said:
I just had the errant, random thought that "Hazou is an alternate Orochimaru, if the sannin had turned left instead of right." I'm about to clock in for work, so I'll poke at the kernal later on, but at first glance it seems to have a glimmer of truth: Hazou's bloodline makes connecting with others difficult (didn't Hazou say at one point that the IN sometimes feels more like a puppet on strings than a person?), Hazou deals with the Ami-problem of being forced to maneuver around/with others who are shortsighted and focused on small, petty whims rather than the big, existential threats that the MfD universe faces on the daily (similarity to Orochimaru's possible frustration in dealing with those who aren't as educated as he is), Hazou's insane determination to change the EN for the better seems to bare superficial similarity to Orochimaru's (canon) quest for immortality (Hazou is more focused on humanity's/civilization's Uplift and Immortality, rather than a more personal immortality).

Note: Not saying we should go and hug Orochimaru, I was just speculating on the possible parallels between Hazou's narrative character and Orochimaru. This is a rough idea, but even if we take this as gospel truth (and we shouldn't) then that's yet another reason to avoid Orochimaru; even the most well-adjusted people wouldn't relish in seeing a morally-superior foil to themselves, and Orochimaru isn't well adjusted.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

This game is basically, "INTJ, The Quest."
 
Last edited:
Have we tried telling the meta-chakraAI to turn the chakraAI off and on again?
 
Remove ads
Chapter 375: Plotting Doom
  • Threadmarks

    • "…that's what it comes down to," Hazō finished. The more he dwelled on the nature of the Hagoromo situation—a pack of arrogant bigots claiming injury because a girl dared to be happy without their permission—the more his blood started to boil. He'd considered negotiation. He'd considered looking for more open-minded priests among the Hagoromo and persuading them to turn their back on their clan's fouler teachings just this once. But no. An example had to be made. Two hundred years from now, a senior sealmaster hearing an apprentice dismiss vital safety precautions would accuse them of "speaking like a Hagoromo", and the apprentice would pale and beg forgiveness for their folly.

    The family, assembled in the atrium in the main building, listened attentively. None of this was news to most of them, but every shinobi who lived long enough learned to respect the tradition of the pre-battle speech. Done well, it enhanced motivation, enhanced focus, and reaffirmed team unity—the unity that had once kept Team Uplift alive and would now leave the Hagoromo destroyed.

    "Our objective is to break the Hagoromo, once and for all. If any of you can't commit to that, if you want to sit this one out, now's your last chance to say so."

    He waited.

    "They hurt my Keiko," Mari said in the icy voice of Maris normally best left buried. "The gloves are off."

    "What she said," Noburi said.

    Yuno's head whipped round.

    "Our Keiko," Noburi hastily corrected himself. "They hurt our Keiko."

    Yuno smiled, appeased.

    "How is this even a question?" Kagome-sensei demanded. "They hurt our family. And I still say you should let me turn their compound to dust instead of all this politicking. Send a message once and for all."

    Hazō resisted the temptation to give him the go-ahead. There were reasons not to massacre an entire clan, though they got harder to remember every time Lord Hagoromo's smug face floated to the surface of his mind.

    That left the two people Hazō still wasn't certain about. Really, there hadn't been any need to confirm whether Mari, Kagome-sensei, or Noburi were on board, but Yuno and Haru might not have been comfortable being singled out in front of everyone.

    "Yuno?" he asked. "I know Isan is a particularly traditionalist society. How do you feel about this?"

    Yuno didn't reply straight away.

    "She's the Pangolin Summoner," she finally said. "She has Akio's blessing. With the rest of the village being the way it is, she might technically be the holiest person alive."

    Hazō paused to take in the image of Saint Keiko. It was probably good that she wasn't here. She would never let him hear the end of it.

    Still, he wasn't looking for blind faith. That was how you got people like the Hagoromo.

    "I'm not looking for an Isan answer," he said. "I'm looking for yours, Yuno. What do you think of Keiko's relationship? Is it something you can fight for?"

    Yuno took more time to think.

    "She's the Pangolin Summoner," she said, "and that means Akio saw what was wrong with her and decided to bless her anyway. We were always taught that what she is shouldn't be allowed. It's unclean. It isn't right."

    Her hand closed around Satsuko's haft.

    "But what's happening out there is disgusting," she spat. "She never chose to be born this way. She never hurt anybody by having a woman lover. She even made sure to keep it behind closed doors where nobody would see. Who are they to punish her for being unclean? What gives them the right?

    "Give the word," she said. "I'll go and get rid of them. Once the Hagoromo are gone, the rest should think twice about how they treat her. Or if they don't… there's plenty of room in the grooves."

    Hazō continued to resist the temptation.

    "I think that would be a bad idea," he said reluctantly. "Murder of Leaf citizens is a crime."

    "There's always something," Yuno muttered.

    "Haru," Hazō said, "what about you?"

    Haru shrugged. "I figured you still didn't trust me. Honestly, after everything that's happened, I don't know how much I trust you either. And I'm not going to pretend I'm completely comfortable with all this, because I'm not.

    "But," his voice grew stronger, "I made the decision to join the Gōketsu, and I do not go back on my decisions. This is my clan now. If anybody thinks of lifting a finger against my clan, they had better be prepared to lose an arm. Simple as that."

    Hazō grinned. "I knew I could count on you. This was never about trust, Haru. It's just that I already knew what everyone else thought, and didn't want to assume.

    "All right," he said. "Everyone's on board. The Hagoromo have hurt one of our own, and they've put their petty prejudices over the good of the entirety of Leaf. If they will not change, then we will break them until change is their only way to survive. Let's get started.

    "Mari, we need their weaknesses. See if Jiraiya's notes have anything. If not, I know you can find plenty of blackmail material on your own. Do they have any relationships with the yakuza? I know we can leverage those. Also, I think it might be time for another Lizardbreath. Get what you need from Noburi, pick a target, and go. No need for confirmation—I trust your judgement."

    "Hazō," Noburi said, "you do remember the risk we took last time? I'm not a drugging expert. I don't even know if Leaf has any. The wrong dose could be… dangerous."

    "Yes," Hazō agreed, "it could."

    He hesitated.

    "Err on the side of caution. Unlike with Lizardbreath, we don't have to get it perfect first time."

    "With pleasure," Mari purred.

    "Next, Noburi and Akane. Yuno, I'd appreciate it if you backed them up. The Hagoromo have a monopoly on religious legitimacy, and they don't deserve it. If we're going to stop Leaf following their lead, it has to go. There are two alternative religions we have access to which we can build up: Toadism and the Church of Youth. Noburi, you'll be in charge of Toadism. Summon Gamasēji and get him converting people. I'm thinking—"

    Yuno held up her hand.

    "I'm sorry, but I think this is a very bad idea."

    "What? Why?"

    "There is nothing more important than religion," Yuno said. "These people have grown up believing that the Hagoromo have the right to speak for the Will of Fire. If some outsider—and almost everyone here is an outsider to Leaf religion—comes and tells them that their own religion is right and the one everybody trusts is wrong, they won't be happy. In Isan, summons are beings of legend that served Ui himself, but here, aren't they just giant monsters who happen to be on Leaf's side? Who would ever trust something like that over the priests who conducted your parents' funeral, and your wedding, and your marking, and your speaking ceremony, and your initiation, and your coming-of-age ceremony, and your youth trial, and your consecration, and your parents', and your grandparents', and so on all the way back to when the village was founded?

    "Right now, the only thing the Hagoromo are accusing you of is lying about Keiko. People can get angry about that, but then they're just angry because you insulted someone they respect. If the Hagoromo start accusing you of trying to undermine the Will of Fire… in Isan, you would probably get executed."

    Hazō frowned. "But Toadism and the Church of Youth are already here. They're not foreign elements. I just want to expand their influence to break the Hagoromo monopoly."

    Yuno shook her head. "It's not a monopoly. That's merchant talk. It's the way things are. You don't shop around for religions and then get excited because there's a better looking one for sale. Anybody who does that doesn't belong in a faithful community. A decent person believes in something because it's true, or they think it's true, and they don't change their mind unless they find out they're wrong.

    "To the people of Leaf, the Hagoromo doing what they do is the way things are. They don't need alternatives, because they already have what they want. They have someone who knows what the right things to do are to make the Will of Fire happy, or whatever it is you're supposed to do with it, and they can get on with their lives and leave the Hagoromo to take care of the rituals. Can they count on a giant toad to do it better? Or those people who dress like Akane?"

    "Actually," Akane said with a wry smile, "I dress like them. But I think Yuno's right. If we try to challenge their legitimacy head-on, then they will use that legitimacy against us. I don't know if we can afford to escalate in that direction. If they say we're acting against the Will of Fire by getting people to use different rituals, and we say we aren't, whom are people more likely to listen to?"

    "Also," Noburi added, "Toadism is dumb. I put up with it because I have to, but Gamasēji is literally going out there and telling people that giant toads are the pinnacle of existence and everyone should put everything they've got into becoming one in their next life. And you know what's worse? The only thing people know about Toads is that they were Jiraiya's summons. So they ask if Jiraiya was a Toadist, and I have to tell them he wasn't, and boom, there goes Gamasēji's remaining credibility."

    "I hate to say it, but credibility isn't Rock Lee's strong point either," Akane said. "The Church of Youth's building up a good reputation among civilians, because Lee and the others do humanitarian work, and the philosophy itself is empowering, but… do I need to describe what Rock Lee's PR skills are like? Maybe if it was Hazō preaching Youth, people would listen—you were always so good at that—but I don't think Lee is going to win any converts from people who think the Hagoromo are what a priest is supposed to look like."

    "Also," Noburi said, "can I just say I'm not totally comfortable with the idea of placing our bets on an organisation bankrolled by the Hyūga?"

    Hazō heaved a deep sigh. "Fine, that's my best and most brilliant idea buried. Let's move on to something less controversial. Haru, I'd like you to take the lead on sabotaging Hagoromo-affiliated businesses and infrastructure. Get me a list, and make a note of their security arrangements. They're going to have an unfortunate series of accidents, and I want to know how to make them as destructive as possible."

    Haru froze up.

    "When you say 'affiliated businesses'… do you mean the way my and Akane's parents' workshops are affiliated businesses of the Gōketsu?"

    Hazō nodded. "Haru, we're not going to be able to take down the Hagoromo without hurting their finances, and we're not going to be able to hurt their finances without inconveniencing the people who work for them. I'm sorry. I wish I knew a way to do this that only targeted the people at the top who are responsible, but I don't think there is one. For now, just get me a list. We can go through and decide how much damage we want to deal, and to whom, once you're done."

    Haru's body language was tense, and he didn't look Hazō in the eye, but he didn't refuse.

    "Great," Hazō said wearily. "Now, the final item on the agenda before Operation Burn the Hagoromo to the Ground begins. We need to decide what to do about the marriage. What are our options? The most reliable would be to get a Hagoromo priest to do it despite the orders. Can we bribe one? Blackmail one?"

    Noburi winced. "Yuno, do you want to take this one, or shall I?"

    "Oh, right," Yuno said with dawning understanding. "Most of these people didn't grow up in a clan. It's obvious if you have. They'd be going against their clan head's direct orders, and doing it in public, and turning against the clan in a matter of honour, and using the authority the clan entrusted them with to do it."

    "It's a perfect storm of treachery," Noburi said. "I'm not sure there's anything worse you can actually do as a clan ninja, short of getting one of your own killed or selling clan secrets. The clan head would have to have them exiled or executed just to save face."

    "Right," Hazō said. "Not realistic, then. What about alternative options? We don't have to change Leaf culture just to use a ritual for ourselves. Yuno has a legitimate claim to have her wedding carried out under Isan rituals. In fact, that might be better for the end goal of earning legitimacy with Isan. Toadism and the Church of Youth might not be popular, but they're not illegal either. Arguably, we could even use Mist rituals."

    There was a chorus of "No, we couldn't."

    "All right, not Mist rituals," Hazō conceded. "I'm not sure anyone here even knows what they are."

    "Not well enough to do it myself," Mari said, "and I really don't think we want to try to ship in a Mist officiant to conduct a wedding between Leaf citizens in Leaf."

    "I don't actually know whether Toads marry," Noburi said. "Or whether Gamasēji would be up for it. I could ask, if you really think it's a good idea."

    "The Church of Youth doesn't have any formal rituals," Akane said, "but I'm sure Lee would be happy to make something up if you asked."

    "Um…" Yuno started, "I know we have serious practical concerns here, but I really don't want to marry under a ritual somebody just made up.

    "I've waited for this all my life," she said quietly. "I never believed it would really happen, and part of me is still waiting to wake up. I know I can't have the wedding I wanted when I was still in Isan, with the blessings of Akio and the founders, and the proper ceremony that my ancestors had passed down for hundreds of years, but still… even if it has to be a wedding under a pagan religion, I at least want it to be done right."

    "Could we have more than one ceremony?" Noburi asked. "I mean, a whatever ceremony in Leaf, but then a proper one in Isan, with the geese and the clockwise dance and stuff?"

    "Or we could skip the whatever ceremony altogether," Hazō said. "Mari and Jiraiya had a paperwork marriage without any rituals whatsoever because Leaf needed it. Why shouldn't the same happen now? Just file some papers here, and get the ceremony done in Isan. Everyone's happy. Except the Hagoromo, which is the point.

    "…Mari? What's wrong?"

    "Nothing," Mari said. "It's a workable idea. In fact, strengthening an existing precedent of marriage without ritual might be a better way of breaking the Hagoromo monopoly than fighting fire with fire. The question is whether Asuma will go for it. The legitimacy of our alliance with Isan will be founded on the legitimacy of the marriage, and I'm not sure it's something he wants at all left to the interpretation."

    "Great," Hazō said. "I guess that's Plan A until somebody thinks of something better. Mari, Haru, you know what to do. Everyone else… I'm suspending our religious objectives, but I still want you to talk to Gamasēji and Rock Lee. Would they officiate if we asked? How would it work? We need to know our options."

    "What about you?" Noburi asked.

    "I need to go see a man about a dog."

    -o-​

    The last thing Hazō had expected on coming back from the Kei compound was hearing voices raised in passion coming from the main building, much less those voices, much less together.

    "My brother told me you were a man of reason!" Keiko screeched. "This abomination is a betrayal of everything Uplift stands for! If Hazō could ever begin to imagine that you so abuse the trust he places in you—"

    "Nonsense," Gaku replied, his own voice quieter but no less intense, and oddly determined for a civilian facing down an angry ninja. "Everything I have done, I have done for the Gōketsu. I admit I have stained my hands time and again, but before you declare my work unethical, you should look to your own—"

    "What is going on here?" Hazō demanded before matters could escalate.

    "Hazō, this man has been writing numbers in longhand!" Keiko exclaimed in the voice of a woman announcing that Gaku had been selling their sealing research to the Hyūga.

    "M'lord, your relative insists, in defiance of all evidence and custom, that numbers are to be tracked in pure figures even in informal notes, notwithstanding the dangers of confusion between similar numbers, misplacement of decimal points, and many other troublesome issues which a longhand approach safely avoids," Gaku reported.

    "Instead," Keiko retorted, "you would have this clan trust a system which is outdated, critically vulnerable to issues of handwriting legibility, inefficient in its use of paper, and all but proven to be more error-prone due to the interconnections between verbal and numerical thought. To think that I trusted you to protect my family in my absence."

    "If you insist on citing more unpublished Nara research…" Gaku began.

    "Enough," Hazō said. "Keiko, please don't antagonise my staff. Gaku… please return to your post. I don't have the energy for this right now."

    "M'lord," Gaku acknowledged, backing off.

    "You know not what you risk, Hazō," Keiko said. "In the days when I managed this clan's budget…"

    "Yes, the halcyon days of our youth," Hazō said. "It's nice to see you too, Keiko."

    "Hazō," Keiko said, "It is good to see you as well. However, I would like to apologise. The present situation, with all of its ramifications, is entirely due to my actions at the Clan Council meeting."

    Hazō laughed. "You mean the fact that Hagoromo ended up being outed as a raving bigot? No, I'd call that a victory. Leaf is about to see exactly what happens to people who challenge the Gōketsu for the sake of their petty hatreds."

    "Which, as it happens, is the other purpose of my visit today," Keiko said. "Given that we are now both in active opposition to the Hagoromo, it seems appropriate to coordinate. You are already aware of the Shikiri Museum exhibition. It is a pity you did not attend the opening night—I am told it was quite memorable. Lord Hagoromo demanded, furious like a hooked Hoshigaki, that all of his clan's tapestries be removed from the exhibition forthwith. Naturally, all of the items exhibited were Nara property, so this did not take place. His attempts to pressure the museum into closing the exhibition will likewise be unsuccessful. We will counter his efforts for a little time, and then rest assured the clan will have greater concerns.

    "You are aware that the Hagoromo have experienced a sharp influx of orders recently? Unfortunately, it seems that their weavers' latest batch of materials is suffering from an infestation of gastronomic meltworms, a fact that will not become apparent until the finished products begin disintegrating in their new owners' hands."

    The gastronomic meltworm was, in fact, indigenous to the Water Country, and more specifically to the Mist Academy of the Ninja Arts. Should an inattentive student's lunch vanish mysteriously when their back was turned, the teachers would turn a deaf ear to all complaints and blame the disappearance on another attack by the gastronomic meltworms. As far as the establishment was concerned, a student incapable of protecting something as crucial as food did not deserve to keep it.

    "Of course, merely ruining the clan's reputation and stripping it of its client base is insufficient. By their own actions, they have placed themselves far beyond such half-measures. Tell me, Hazō, are you aware of the Leaf protocol for chakra parasite infestations?"

    Hazō shook his head.

    "Should goods coming into Leaf be found to be infested by chakra parasites, the source area must be placed in immediate quarantine. No further items from that source will be admitted into Leaf territory until the quarantine has been lifted by the senior parasitology expert. This minor disaster has taken place several times during Dr Yakushi's career, generally without long-term repercussions.

    "Unfortunately," she said with a smile like a blade, "Leaf's senior parasitology expert is presently one Orochimaru."

    "Who has no interest whatsoever in doing his job," Hazō concluded, "and won't think twice about killing anyone the Hagoromo send to pester him."

    "Indeed. As it happens, there are a handful of individuals capable of saving the Hagoromo, should they thus find themselves stripped of their resource base. I am given to understand that a certain Gōketsu Clan is on cordial terms with Dr Yakushi, the one man Orochimaru might briefly pause his work for. Meanwhile, a certain Mori Ami is on speaking terms with Orochimaru himself. Without these individuals' favour, however… why, the quarantine could continue indefinitely."

    "How terrible," Hazō agreed. "When might such an unforeseeable incident take place?"

    "If Mari is willing to offer her influence with the Merchant Council, which is responsible for imposing such quarantines, an announcement could be made within days."

    "I'll get her on it when she comes back," Hazō said. "I can't wait to see her face."

    "Unfortunately," Keiko said, "I am given to understand that we are faced with a deadline, and there are two issues remaining where the Nara do not have a readied position of advantage. Hazō, are you aware of the Hagoromo papermaking business?"

    "I am. It's a sideline left over from before the printing press." He didn't add, for the moment, that it was on Haru's list of sites to investigate.

    "It will also shortly be their sole remaining source of income. I trust I do not need to spell out the implications."

    "Sources of income?" Hazō said gleefully. "Can't have the Hagoromo having those. Who knows what ideas they might get."

    "Quite. And once their income is gone, it is only a matter of applying suitable expenses, by which I mean cataclysmic costs to make the wealthiest of Earth Country's magnates tremble with fear. Could I prevail upon you to assist with this?"

    "You know," Hazō said thoughtfully, "I have this vague memory of someone I know giving the Hagoromo large monthly payments which they're probably counting on when preparing their budget."

    "How curious," Keiko said. "I have no recollection of such a person."

    "No," Hazō said after a second. "Me neither."

    "I trust you to apply your unparalleled gift for destruction to the problem," Keiko said. "Once they are a mere hollow shell of their former self, the Nara will be ready to guide the endgame. Tempting though it is to simply annihilate them, and weather the Hokage's wrath as an acceptable price for purging the village of vermin, happily we have been able to design an ending more useful to us and more cruel to them."

    "What would be more cruel than annihilating them?" Hazō asked neutrally.

    "Once it has been made clear to them that their survival rests solely on our favour, they will be invited to… recant a certain unfortunate element of their dogma. A statement that neither homosexuality nor gay marriage are at odds with the Will of Fire, made with the weight of Hagoromo authority, will grant much-needed momentum to Ino-Shika-Chō's work to normalize these in public opinion, while doubtless causing grievous pain to those who will then have to live every day with that betrayal of their principles. Of course, once that statement is made, they will also have no choice but to officiate at all such weddings should they become legal."

    Hazō had a vision of Lord Hagoromo, face scrunched up like he was chewing an O'Uzu earth lemon as he juggled six gems before a pair of smiling women, doing the right thing and loathing every second of it.

    "Thus perish all who insult my sister."

    -o-​

    You have received 2 + 1 = 3 XP.

    -o-​

    Mari has begun collecting blackmail. She hasn't found any evidence of relationships with the yakuza. Note that you instructed her to act on opportunities for blackmail, but didn't mention how (i.e. what she was supposed to blackmail her targets into doing). She succeeded in getting a worker at the Glorious Moorhen to drug the drink of Hagoromo Kyōhei, a chūnin known for drinking to relax after long sessions of studying scripture, but his hallucinations and reduced motor control merely got him mocked for low alcohol tolerance.

    Toads don't get married in the same way as humans, but Gamasēji is happy to guide Yuno and Noburi through an adapted bonding ritual as soon as both of them formally convert to Toadism.

    Rock Lee is thrilled with the idea of blessing somebody's wedding with Youth, and will officiate the second you ask. Akane's attempts to establish what this would involve were unsuccessful, as Rock Lee took this as a cue to extemporise on the joy of youthfulness.

    Haru has a list of businesses, primarily dyers and weavers, as well as some scribes and bookbinders who use Hagoromo paper, and the details of the paper mill itself. Most are ordinary civilian businesses, with few or no guards and standard locks. The paper mill generally has one or two ninja in attendance. He reluctantly notes that dye vats can be contaminated, ruining a large quantity of material quickly and quietly. Other specialised equipment can be sabotaged or broken. All buildings are wooden (as is much of said equipment) and thus flammable.

    After some discussion, Ebisu is prepared to try teaching Canun, with a hefty fee to account for risks of dangerous chakra interaction, plus the difficulty of teaching someone who can't take damage.

    -o-​

    What do you do?

    Voting ends on Saturday 26th of September, 1 p.m. New York time.
     
    Last edited:
  • Threadmarks
    • Reader mode
    You must login or register to reply here.
    Remove ads
    Back
    Top