- Location
- The Maple Syrup Mountains
We aren't? I thought this quest was all about finding the most creative way to kill our protagonist.
Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest
- Thread starter eaglejarl
- Start date
-
- Tags
- naruto rationalist romance armageddon is looking better and better damn you kishimoto explosions everywhere explosives solve everyone if in doubt surrender to the mercy of zabuza it seemed like a good idea at the time looks like a really bad case of being a jōnin my god. where does the lore end? precommitting is the winning plan screaming in kagome screw the rules i have explosives something bad might still happen sometimes you gotta sociopath stabby zabby subsection c of paragraph 9 should include we can weaponize this so hard open voting
Well we very much didn't and she knows it. If pressured, J will take our side. Problem solved.
- Location
- Yes.
Mori clan.
- Location
- Europe
And Ami, our future Wife.
We really need Mari or Akane for...everything.
Drasky
Dude
Dead people are pretty stable all things considered.
Noumero
Omit Needless Words
Wait.
"Yesterday"? Unless I'm mistaken, the meeting was today. Is it another clerical error, or...?
*snaps fingers*
That's it! If we implosion nuke Mist then Ami will die!
Origami Clock
Right twice a day
- Location
- Brighton, UK
Do you think this is the first time they've had to deal with a member with a rampant Voice deciding that they'd become world overlord? There's probably an entire wing in the Mori body storage wing devoted to them.
[X] Action Plan: No.
- Dispel.
- There are no words to explain how not happening this is.
- Code Killbox!
- Enlist Kei's support in writing a letter of declination. We're sure she would enjoy the opportunity to prevent this disaster. Noburi's too, he would probably feel sympathetic, given the Yuno debacle.
- But not Jiraiya, because there's a slim chance he might order us to go ahead with the marriage.
- Swear on our fathers grave that we did not and do not plan on offering her sister a marriage proposal.
- Code Killbox!
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Emstar
The Shining One
- Location
- Trapped in an extradimensional rift.
- Pronouns
- She/They
Swear on our fathers grave that we did not and do not plan on offering her sister a marriage proposal.
We're supposed to consult with Jiraiya on political matters before making any such decision.
Origami Clock
Right twice a day
- Location
- Brighton, UK
The winning move with Ami is not to play. Any engagement is just feeding the countless alogorithms that she has instead of a mind.
Hazou didn't say what she said he did. We can get literal mind probes to prove it, if Jariya turning the social spec blowtorch onto him wouldn't be proof enough. Ami can poke for a reaction, but she is not powerful enough to deal with a village saying 'stop messing with the genin'. She has soft power that is ultimately trumped by Mizukage and Hokage hard power, and if both of them turn on her for shitting up the negotiations by say...targeting the Hokage's...apprentice and possible heir, she's going to have a problem.
Hazou didn't say what she said he did. We can get literal mind probes to prove it, if Jariya turning the social spec blowtorch onto him wouldn't be proof enough. Ami can poke for a reaction, but she is not powerful enough to deal with a village saying 'stop messing with the genin'. She has soft power that is ultimately trumped by Mizukage and Hokage hard power, and if both of them turn on her for shitting up the negotiations by say...targeting the Hokage's...apprentice and possible heir, she's going to have a problem.
- Location
- USA
- Pronouns
- He/Him
I'm several pages behind, but wanted to settle this: Kagome is not there, that was my mistake. Fixed.
Five minutes ago.
Isn't Kagome supposed to be in Leaf?
The problem is that we can't likely decline. She's not proposing marriage, she's saying we proposed marriage. You think she doesn't have a plan to deal with us declining? She'll make it look like we're reneging, which would be a big deal, and make us look really, really bad. We cannot handle this on our own - we are in over our heads here. We need to take this to Jiraiya, pronto.
- Location
- NY
J-man needs to know about this approximately 5 minutes ago, and to the Out with any other considerations. I hope he's finished his gyoza.
TaliesinSkye
Occasional Editor
- Location
- Northeast Ohio, United States
Gotta hand it to the QMs, they found a good way to troll us. There must be pages of laughter in their chat after finding ways to fit the lighthouse reference and the Ami marriage proposal in one update. I'll bet they took finding a way to make it something the hivemind would not want as a personal challenge.
So. Screaming for Jiraiya before Keiko overcomes her confusion long enough to murder us, then? Or should we ask Keiko how best to deal with Ami's practical jokes and then scream for Jiraiya, on the theory that Jiraiya wouldn't arrive soon enough otherwise?
Edit:
Some realizations occurred to me. If this is a real move and not a joke (i.e. she's already told everyone and their cousins about our 'proposal') it might be a maneuver to make herself too critical to foreign relations to be disposable. And it might be difficult for us to turn down. So we could be looking at some sort of faux engagement as a political farce situation.
Or maybe Ami is doing it primarily as a way to get herself back in Keiko's life without dragging Keiko back to the Mori. It's a clever means of accomplishing that, I have to admit.
Or, and this is more likely than either option alone, it's both.
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- Location
- The Maple Syrup Mountains
Unless, like with her seduction, the moment we stand up to her and refuse she drops the act and moves on to the analysis phase (though, as with that, we don't know whether it'd still be an act if we don't refuse)
I feel like if Jiraiya wanted to he'd have pretty good odds of forcing Ami to hold to this (does the letter have any uniquely identifying characteristics, or is it just regular script in Ami handwriting that could be faked?), and that there's also a pretty good chance if we say no then it all blows over. Quite possibly this is Ami telling Jiraiya that he's got a perfect opportunity to marry Hazou to her if he wants to, since Ami knows Hazou would take something like this directly to Jiraiya.
As a side note, we shouldn't go dramatic with Keiko and swear on our father's grave. Instead, we should initiate CCnJ and explain to her that a) we met with Ami to try and get information on her diplomatic faction for Jiraiya, b) we did not propose to her or do anything that could be considered a proposal during the meeting, and c) we're going straight to Jiraiya to get this sorted out.
Keiko may feel very frazzled right now, but she'll still understand that when we go CCnJ it means we have something to say and we're worried about subtext getting in the way of making a clear point.
- Location
- Snakesden
I mean, this is very obviously something to bring to J. It seems healthy to make our own analysis, though.
My model is it's almost certainly just fucking with us. Seems like a cheap way to put us off-guard, and I assume that's what she gets out of it. She is running a small chance of us saying yes, but that doesn't put her in a bad position either.
Of course, if Ami has short timelines, she might be more willing to make "long-term" commitments, either to further her values after her death, maximize value of the coming month, or improve her chances of survival.
My model is it's almost certainly just fucking with us. Seems like a cheap way to put us off-guard, and I assume that's what she gets out of it. She is running a small chance of us saying yes, but that doesn't put her in a bad position either.
Of course, if Ami has short timelines, she might be more willing to make "long-term" commitments, either to further her values after her death, maximize value of the coming month, or improve her chances of survival.
TaliesinSkye
Occasional Editor
- Location
- Northeast Ohio, United States
CCnJ is an excellent idea for informing Keiko before she explodes like a malfunctioning explosive tag.
Ami is optimal. Assume all actions serve more than one purpose.