[x] MfD kitten: Mewramasa
Y'know, there's a whole other dimension to this thing. We could save a lot of time if Leaf could find the arachnid/hornet/neighbor summoner on the human path.
The ball collapsed to the floor, resolving itself into the shape of a stunned black feline a little larger than a housecat.
"C'mon, Sammy," Ami chided, "you can't just keep going for the jugular. It's predictable. Try the Achilles tendon, or the hamstring. Humans only have two legs, so if you take one out, they're all yours to play with as you like."
"Oh wow thats a sweet name, I should vote for that--"
2x NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO combo!Damn. These all wouldve fit criteria for past commits, but nobody pinged me : C
That is a statement for divergence between timeflow. But when measured purely on the 7th Path, how long is their day-night cycle? Not asking for munchkinry purposes. Just for world-building and immersion purposes.Time is slightly fluky between the Seventh Path and the Human Path. The day on the Seventh Path is usually a bit longer than on the Human Path, but sometimes it's a little shorter. There is also a slight variability between time on the two planes. Conveniently, this variability works out to exactly the right amount of variance such that the QMs don't have to keep exact track of the relationship. It's a very convenient happenstance. None of the clans to whom you have access have an almanac. Hazō can manage on-time check-ins with no problem, although he has a strange feeling that he might lose the ability to do that were the Kami Lords to need too much aspirin as a result of in-depth investigation of, or attempts to munchkin, any of the temporal shenanigans related to the two Paths. He also suspects that in such a situation he might lose a lot more than the ability to do on-time check-ins, if you catch my drift.
As stated:That is a statement for divergence between timeflow. But when measured purely on the 7th Path, how long is their day-night cycle? Not asking for munchkinry purposes. Just for world-building and immersion purposes.
The day on the Seventh Path is usually a bit longer than on the Human Path, but sometimes it's a little shorter.
After a few seconds of awkward silence, Inoue glanced at the water clock on the mantel. "Come on, it's getting late," she said. "Everyone hit the sack, I want to be out early tomorrow. According to Honami that big important guest is supposed to be arriving in the morning. His name is Joutano, he's some lord she's never heard of, and he demanded their very best suite for himself and his friends."
This is really interesting, because it's completely impossible for most astronomical bodies. Planets or large moons that get their day/night cycle from rotating have very regular periods of rotation. But the Seventh Path could be on a body undergoing chaotic rotation which is usually seen on small nonspherical moons in complex systems of orbiting bodies like Saturn's moon Hyperion. It wouldn't be a very chaotic orbit, because the change from day to day is small. Does this have any impact on the quest? Probably not.The day on the Seventh Path is usually a bit longer than on the Human Path, but sometimes it's a little shorter.
So their cycle is variable for them as well? At random?
This is really interesting, because it's completely impossible for most astronomical bodies. Planets or large moons that get their day/night cycle from rotating have very regular periods of rotation. But the Seventh Path could be on a body undergoing chaotic rotation which is usually seen on small nonspherical moons in complex systems of orbiting bodies like Saturn's moon Hyperion. It wouldn't be a very chaotic orbit, because the change from day to day is small. Does this have any impact on the quest? Probably not.
So their cycle is variable for them as well? At random?
I thought it was time itself that varied, as in one hour there wouldn't always be one hour in the Human Path. Is that also true or is it just the actual day cycle that varies?
Hazō can manage on-time check-ins with no problem, although he has a strange feeling that he might lose the ability to do that were the Kami Lords to need too much aspirin as a result of in-depth investigation of, or attempts to munchkin, any of the temporal shenanigans related to the two Paths. He also suspects that in such a situation he might lose a lot more than the ability to do on-time check-ins, if you catch my drift.
Hazō could feel the world balance on a knife's edge, just like it had when Mari invited them to run away with her. A binary choice. Two incompatible, incomparable futures. Hazō couldn't see even five minutes ahead into the future where he said yes, and that in itself made him feel like it might be better to back off. There was so much to lose—Akane herself, whose worries he simply didn't have the experience to dismiss, but also things like the Gōketsu's bond with the Ino-Shika-Chō, either or both clans' reputation, and, of course, his life (if Gōketsu Hazō couldn't get himself executed for treason as a result of dating a mind-reader, no one could). Life was good right now. The Gōketsu were wealthy, influential, and succeeding at a dozen Uplift projects. He was already in the romantic relationship of his dreams. Leaf was fragile but recovering. Sure, the entire Seventh Path might be on the verge of destruction at the appendages of unknown eldritch abominations, but there was always something.
And on the other path, so far from the status quo you couldn't see it with a telescope (assuming those weren't a myth, as Hazō was increasingly starting to suspect), he'd found adventure, discovery, power and success beyond anything he could have dreamed of, and yes, true love. There was no way a path built on sensible, safe decisions could have left him demonstrating the supremacy of Righteous Face Punching Style before a village of bemused missing-nin and one starry-eyed Akane.
For that matter, a path built on sensible, safe decisions would have curved way around Kagome-sensei's forest, meaning no sealing, no skywalkers, and no joining Leaf. Looking back, Hazō had only reached the point where dating Ino was imaginable because making bold, unreasonable decisions that paid off beyond anyone's expectations was his status quo. No matter how he might pretend that rationality was his guiding virtue, the Way of Hazō was to dream big, take enormous risks to fulfil those dreams, and beat the odds because he was awesome and had an equally awesome family at his back.
"I think I want this," Hazō told Akane.
"I don't know exactly what 'this' is," he admitted, "or how it's supposed to work. I love Mari and trust her judgement enormously, but we've never seen her do polyamory herself, and by all accounts, the Heartbreaker wasn't a poster girl for healthy relationships either. The best working models we have are Keiko and Mitarashi—Kei Anko, and I can't imagine imitating the former and refuse to imagine imitating the latter.
"So that makes this a leap into the unknown, and I promise you, Akane, I'm at least as scared of things going wrong as you are. You may think you know just how badly I can mess up a romantic relationship, but I have a feeling that you ain't seen nothing yet. Twice the girlfriends means twice the disaster potential. No, more than that, because I'm sure there are some kinds of disaster that exist just for triads as a whole, or if they don't, I will probably invent them."
Akane laughed warmly. Little could have had more of a grounding effect on Hazō (except maybe a hug, which he made a note to get before moving on to the rest of the day's business).
"Still," he said. "A leap into the unknown. Dangers and rewards we can't even imagine, except that we know both are going to be huge. It sounds like an adventure, and there's no one I'd rather go on an adventure with than you."
He stretched out his hand.
Akane took it, then pulled him into an unexpected hug. There really was something calming about her, down to the scent of her hair.
"Well," she said as they disengaged, "I guess we're doing this."
"We are," he agreed, "though maybe not until I'm done with my first epic quest as Dog Summoner."
"You said something about monsters from beyond space and time?" Akane asked, instantly switching from romantic to alert.
"Grab whoever from the clan's around for an emergency briefing. I don't have much time."
The Nara extra-secure discussion space for visitors (the distinction was intriguing) was not designed to be welcoming, with its gloomy colour scheme, natural lack of windows, and strictly-functional furniture. "Top-secret business is tiring and stressful," it seemed to say, "so please get this over with fast so we can go take a nap." However, the Nara were still an ancient and proud clan, with a lineage tracing back to the Sage himself or one of his many brothers, and were about as prepared to invite a guest for an intellectual discussion without serving green tea as the Hyūga were to attend a Clan Council meeting wearing youthsuit green.
"I hope this is important, Hazō," Keiko said impatiently, her cup sitting motionlessly in front of her as if only there for decoration. "You and I will have plenty of opportunities to communicate during check-ins, and I had hoped to finish my preparations early so I could have the evening to… say goodbye."
"Trust me, Keiko, I don't want to be here either."
Keiko raised an eyebrow.
"Sorry," Hazō said, "that came out wrong. I mean I'm in a hurry as well, and also I'm not exactly bearing good news."
"I see. You have finally recognised the depths of your secretary's depravity, and are here to beg me to restore coherence and efficiency to the Gōketsu record-keeping systems before I depart."
Hazō looked at her blankly.
"No? Well, there is no time in any case. Then you are here because you find yourself unable to cope with a happy and stable love life, and desire my expert insight on how to render it more troublesome and complicated."
"Well, actually…" Hazō began. "I mean, no, that's not why I'm here. I wanted to consult you about a potential existential threat."
"I assure you, Hazō, my love life has not quite reached that level, though given projected trends…"
"Apologies. I have been in a flurry of activity preparing KEI paperwork for Naruto to force Ami to process, and assigning tasks within the clan to ensure that Shikamaru does not overburden himself again in my absence, and teasing you always makes for excellent stress relief. So, what have you invented on this occasion?"
Hazō sighed. "Does the term 'Eaters' mean anything to you?"
Keiko shook her head. "Nothing specific. Why?"
"There's more," Hazō said grimly. "Cannai, the Dog Clan boss, said there were legends about the Eaters on the Seventh Path, apocalyptic monsters from beyond sealed away by the Sage and his band."
He paused.
"Sealed away by a band of five."
Keiko stood up.
"We need Shikamaru for this. I have been studying the forbidden lore of the Nara, as time allows, but I remain a latecomer. It is probably nothing, but just in case, do not leave this room."
It was probably nothing, but just in case, Hazō was glad he was only a shadow clone.
"Eaters. Devourers. The Ravenous Ones. Gaki," Shikamaru listed off, gazing at the ceiling in recollection. "I am not a specialist in applied mythology, but such legends are ubiquitous. Unfortunately, they have precious little in common, and nothing tying them to the Seventh Path. For some reason, the act of eating appears to evoke fear and superstitious awe among the unenlightened. Within the Fire Country, this can be attributed to centuries of warfare against the Akimichi, but I know of no Akimichi summoners."
"So none of this rings any bells?" Hazō asked cautiously. "No lore about sealed horrors which might have recently got free and be in urgent need of stopping?"
"There are two broad kinds of sealed horror, Hazō," Shikamaru said admonishingly. "Those where, were they to break free, you would know, and those where they would be too subtle for anyone to know until it was too late. Besides, I see no reason why any entity from the Human Path should traverse the infinite aether in order to reach the Seventh Path and only then begin its rampage, nor how it would do so without holding a summoning contract. As for entities originating on the Seventh Path… well, as long as they remain confined there, Leaf's priority is ensuring our summoners' safety and continued military effectiveness.
"The reference to the Sage's band of five troubles me, however. You should see if Cannai can offer you names or descriptions. For my part, I will investigate the archives, but Nara information on the Seventh Path is sparse, so I make no promises."
"Thank you," Hazō said.
"On the contrary. Thank you for bringing this information to us. Please keep me informed as the investigation proceeds."
"As a fellow summoner, I imagine he would appreciate it," Shikamaru said. "Beyond that, there is really too little information at present to decide what countermeasures, if any, are necessary. This could be anything from a hoax to a simple chakra beast plague of the kind that destroyed Herring Country."
"What happened to Herring Country?"
"It is not a lead worth pursuing," Keiko said dismissively. "I will speak to Pantsā and see if he has anything to offer on the subject when I am next on the Seventh Path."
"Hazō," she said more quietly, "please remember that the summon pact is a contract. You do not owe the Dog Clan any loyalty they have not purchased. You do not owe them your life. If there truly are sealed horrors out there, beings formidable enough that it required the Sage of Six Paths to stand against them, then this is not a battle you should be involved in. If you confirm the presence of such an enemy, escape immediately. Nothing else."
"I can't promise that, Keiko. I've accepted a mission. I'm not going to do anything suicidal, and I'm obviously going to fight to win, but risking your life for your objectives is part of being a ninja. In a world like ours, trying to live a life without danger just means forcing the people around you to take up a greater share of the burden."
"You imbecile!" Keiko's hands slammed against the table between them, knocking over cups of half-drunk tea. "Do you not understand!? A monster is sealed because it is too powerful to slay! Too powerful to be defeated! Every seal is a recognition of surrender by the human race, a delaying action fought against inevitable extinction! Do you not imagine we would have destroyed them if we could, a thousand times over? Even the Sage—"
"Keiko," Shikamaru said softly.
"Apologies," Keiko muttered, looking down.
She looked up at him, expression pleading. "I underestimated the power of the Seventh Path and it nearly cost me Ami. I cannot lose you to the same mistake."
"I understand," Hazō said finally. "Thank you for warning me, Keiko. I won't retreat from a fight I can win, but I promise I'll be careful." He saw something else in her expression, something unsaid, and added, "I won't leave you behind." The way Jiraiya did.
"Thank you," Keiko said. "For my part, if any shinobi of Isan should raise a hand against the Pangolin Summoner and her acknowledged minions, I promise the survivors will beg to join Leaf as the only way to escape my wrath. I owe Isan a debt of gratitude and a debt from the Night of the Surfing Tapirs, and I am prepared to repay either in full."
"Keiko," Shikamaru interrupted, "you do realise the objective of the mission is to secure additional military power for Hidden Leaf? While I approve in principle of extraordinary violence being inflicted on any who harm my wife, the Hokage may be less amused if you leave Isan in smoking ruins."
"To think that all my training in non-lethal incapacitation will finally be of use," Keiko mused. "I will be certain to collect some obscure Isanese weaponry from my fallen victims to serve as a thank-you gift."
And Asuma had been worried about sending him on a diplomatic mission.
"That's fine," Asuma said. "Be aware that this puts you in debt to the Hagoromo—I'm sanctioning this mission, but ultimately summoner work is about your personal efforts to gain power, same as if you were taking time out to learn a new ninjutsu. It serves Leaf, and Leaf may lend you resources to accomplish it, but Leaf doesn't pay for costs incurred. Also, I have a report on file from the Hagoromo about you taking your apprentice out of Leaf on a week-long hunt without their consent. As far as I'm concerned, that's for the two of you to sort out and they shouldn't be running to me over every little thing, but be aware that I consider them in the right on this one. I appreciate the need for some flexibility, but I didn't instruct you to conduct the teaching at their compound on a whim."
"You have skytower permission for this mission," Asuma went on, "but you're to respect the strictest OPSEC. If the wrong clan gets hold of those seals, or even just the insight that skytowers are seal-based technology, we could end up with a mess that makes the Pangolin War look like a playground scrap. I know for a fact Crow spies have been studying former skytower sites in abandoned Pangolin territory, though Keiko assures me the Pangolins took care to clean up after themselves.
"Yes, sir," Hazō said. "Akane will be staying behind as acting Clan Head."
"Of course she will," Asuma said. "I hope you appreciate what a treasure you have in that girl. If I were her age, and being offered the choice between travelling to an exotic land for a mission with a strong team and low chances of combat and staying home to handle half a clan's worth of work…"
"I know exactly what she is, sir," Hazō said with radiant pride.
"I suppose you do," Asuma agreed. "Ask the genin on your estate what the rumour mill says about you two sometime."
"I… will, sir," Hazō said uncertainly. Great. Now he was going to spend the whole mission wondering about that. Maybe he should include an investigation in his next briefing for Akane.
Asuma gave a resigned smile. "Welcome to the life of the Hokage. Bear that in mind if, like every young person not named Nara, you're dreaming of wearing the hat one day.
Kagome on gaki: "Could be. Gaki are too dumb to break into another Path on their own, or they'd have done it by now, but I can see the Sage bringing some along as insurance back when he was building his prison. Maybe he sealed some up and set up a trigger to let them loose when the population got too high. That's probably why there are legends. He tried them out once, then swept in once they were done to lock them up again and make himself look the hero. Fits the stinker's MO to a tee. Does the Summon Realm have a moon? Probably not? Good. Even Whirlpool couldn't figure out how to get to the seal on the moon. Your best bet for fighting gaki is to hit them from ambush, before they can open their mouth. What you don't want to do is to let them eat your explosions. Nothing more nutritious than a good explosion."
Everyone, please repeat after me: "Oh, the days vary slightly but are typically a bit longer than those on the Human Path? What an interesting bit of worldbuilding our brilliant QMs have created. Having offered up this mild bit of sycophancy, let's make the very safe assumption that it will never have any impact on the universe except as an interesting bit of flavor, and then let's go think about something else. Making nukes, dating Ino, having another evening with Ami, or almost literally anything else."
(And yes, I recognize that this is not the best look when @Sir Stompy has just finished complimenting us on our commitment to simulationism, but there's a limit. I'm drawing the line at keeping things consistent across different calendars and/or day/night cycles.)
Rumors we won't be seeing on-screen for years, because they're probably about the sex lives of the clan with the orgies and the characters involved are minors.