Have something I half-thought-half-dreamed last night.
Homura sat amongst friends, stirring her tea while leaning ever so slightly against Madoka, listening to the other girls' chatter. The tiniest of smiles graced her lips, her eyes... darted around suddenly, as if watching out for hidden threats to the peaceful evening, but the moment passed, and the girl relaxed.
To an outsider, she would've look like any normal girl, if perhaps a tad too thin. To her friends, she looked far more peaceful than she had in months.
They would be surprised to look at her and not see the hard lines around her eyes, to not find her shoulders hard and rigid, tense, weighted down by the world's cruelty. They would be more surprised to hear her talk as much as anyone else, most of her old reservations smoothed away by the passage of time:
"See, I had this problem before," the time traveller interjected into the conversation, "this one timeline where I had to ferry Madoka, Sayaka, and Oriko across a river."
Sayaka snorted. "... Really?"
"Really," nodded Homura gravely, "and what's more, in order to accomplish this, I counted only with one small raft, barely big enough for two of us."
"No, wait," the bleunette waved a hand for Homura to stop, "since it's you saying it, I have to ask, but this is a joke, right?"
An eyebrow raised in challenge. "Are you calling me a liar, Miki Sayaka?"
Sayaka's eyes narrowed.
A small smile tugged at the corner of Homura's lips.
Sayaka huffed, shaking her head.
"The problem," continued Homura, "was threefold: First, of course, I was the only one capable of taking charge of the situation," to everyone's lingering surprise, she did not react at all when Sayaka elbowed her. "Second, were Madoka and Oriko to ever be alone together, Oriko would kill Madoka, because Oriko's an evil murdering sadistic monster who hates everything cute and beautiful," Homura did blush when Madoka kissed her on the cheek, "and third, were Sayaka and Oriko alone, Sayaka would kill Oriko because her Justice driven nature would not allow her anything else. And then she would've become a Witch out of guilt."
Purple eyes flickered towards Mami for an instant, but the golden haired girl didn't react, content to listen with her head leaning on Sabrina's shoulder.
"Yuma knows this one!" the self referred girl jumped to her feet with barely contained excitement. "Can Yuma answer the puzzle?"
Faced with the little girl's big, shining blue eyes, Homura could only nod, ceding her the word.
"This is what you did," explained Yuma, sitting back down as Kyouko tugged down on her, "let's say you all were at side A of the river," the little girl grabbed a butter knife, an upside down empty teacup, a sugar shaker, and a spoon, and laid them all together on the table, "and you wanted to get everyone to side B, across the river," she pointed to an empty spot on the table, "first you took Oriko across..." she moved the spoon and the teacup to the second spot, "then you went back, took Sayaka, and ferried her across," the spoon went back to the start, to cross the 'river' again alongside the knife, "but then in order for Sayaka to not hurt Oriko, you took Oriko with you when you went back," the knife was left alone while the spoon and the cup went back to the sugar, "then you left Oriko and ferried Madoka across, then went back to get Oriko again in the end!"
Everyone watched as Yuma finished moving the four things back and forth across the table, ending with the girl smiling triumphantly at Homura.
The black haired girl nodded pensively. "That would've been a smart solution to the problem, but no, I just shot Oriko."
Yuma blinked.
"... Ahhhhhhhhh not fair!" she yelled, slamming her palms on the table. "You cheated! You shouldn't cheat!"
"There is no such thing as cheating, when it comes to life and death," Homura took a sip of her tea, eyes closed, "there's only protecting those you care about."
"But Yuma's solution would've worked to protect everyone," Sayaka poked Homura's ribs, and this time the girl did flinch, "so there was no need to shoot anybody."
Homura glared, shuffling closer to Madoka and away from Sayaka's poking hand. "Yes, but then I would've had to put up with Oriko being insufferable while I carried her back and forth."
"So it's a matter of convenience?" huffed Sayaka. "Why did you want to keep Oriko alive, if you just shot her in the end?"
"She was a prisoner."
"So the point is that you shouldn't take prisoners?"
"No. The point is that, sometimes, you really should just shoot Oriko," nodded Homura wisely. "That tends to solve a lot of problems. And it's cathartic."
"I have to object," chimed in Oriko, "I do not agree with your point."
"Yeah!" nodded Kirika, "That part about shooting Oriko was totally bad and wrong. Badwrong."
"Of course you'd object, Mikuni," Homura rolled her eyes, not deigning to look at the Seer, "it makes sense since, as I explained, you are a horrible monster who hates everything good."
"That part is also badwrong," chipped in Kirika.
"And it's Kure now, not Mikuni," added Oriko, prompting Kirika to shuffle closer and smile up at her. The couple quickly found themselves staring into each other's eyes, withdrawn into their own little world where they were unaffected by Sayaka's grimace, where Homura's roll of her eyes couldn't hurt their feelings.
"... How cathartic are we talking about?" muttered Sayaka, unable to look away from the cuddling couple. Everyone else turned to look at her. "I mean," the bleunette smirked, "I'm not saying I would really shoot her... maybe just a little? You three got your chance!"
"Sayaka no," chimed in Sabrina distractedly while twirling on of Mami's hairdrills around her finger, "no shooting Oriko. Bad kouhai."
"Yeah, Sayaka," deadpanned Homura, "how could you think of doing that?"
"Sayaka!" gasped Madoka, leaning around Homura to stare at her long time best friend in shock. Before having a giggling fit and burying her head on Homura's neck.
"Miki Sayaka," Mami finally deigned to unglue herself from Sabrina's side and sit up straight, engaging her Senpai persona, "you should not even joke about shooting someone, because shooting people is bad- without having a really good reason," she added as Sayaka opened her mouth, causing her to close it again, "and catharsis does not constitute such. Furthermore, whatever might have happened in the past, Oriko is our friend now, so shooting her would be even more wrong."
"Badwronger," nodded Sabrina.
"So no, you might not shoot Oriko, not even 'a little', and shouldn't even joke about that," finished Mami... before smirking. "... But really, you shouldn't because Kirika would gut you."
"I would!" chimed in Kirika.
Everyone's expressions froze in their faces. They all turned to Kirika.
"Geez!" she squirmed under the scrutinity, "We're all joking, right?"
As one, everyone else relaxed and looked away, leaving the black haired girl to mutter about having learned about proper use of force and not gutting people as the first option.
"... Not like it would kill her, she's a meguca..." Kirika only stopped frowning when Oriko laid a kiss on top of her head, after which she immediately forgot about the matter entirely, too busy brushing her nose against Oriko's cheek to care.
"But there's one thing that doesn't make sense about the problem," mused Sayaka. "Where was Kirika in all of this?"
Homura blinked. "Wounded, of course, for she wouldn't have let me take Oriko prisoner otherwise."
"And why didn't you use magic to solve the problem easier?"
"Because Sabrina did not exist in that timeline, and I had to conserve magic."
"Why didn't you just knock out Oriko?"
"Because- fine," Homura rolled her eyes, "I admit it, the entire situation did not actually happen."
Sayaka nodded to herself, a self satisfied smile on her lips.
"... But why didn't you just-"
Homura flipped her hair on Sayaka's face.