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Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest

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Noumero said:
Inform him about Mari's situation in full: Hana's involvement, our attempts to help, past experiences.
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I would want to put in a bullet point about Hazou's mindset and motivation here. Maybe "Hazou is upset with Hana's actions towards Mari and unable to reconcile this with his love for his mother"

Right now, I see this going very poorly if Hazou has this discussion in form but not in spirit, due to some combination of being clueless and not wanting to betray his mother. Like, he casually mentions "Don't worry, I talked to Hana and got her to fix Mari" and then when Jiraiya presses for details or insinuates that Hana was at fault, Hazou gets flustered and/or defensive.

Noumero said:
Inform Anko and Neira about Mari's condition. Friends would help?
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This seems ill-advised. Baring infosec breach when Hana dragged Mari outside, does anyone outside the clan know details about this right now? This could majorly come back to bite us. At minimum we should run it by Jiraiya.
 
Noumero said:
I'm a bit constrained by wordcount at this point. I brought it down to 263, but any further and I'll probably need to start cutting off minor details.

What edits do you propose? @faflec?
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Can't do a thorough edit ATM since I'm on my phone, but will make something in the next
Vecht said:
This seems ill-advised. Baring infosec breach when Hana dragged Mari outside, does anyone outside the clan know details about this right now? This could majorly come back to bite us. At minimum we should run it by Jiraiya.
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I thought that was a suggestion meant to be given to Jiraiya for approval?
 
Vecht said:
I would want to put in a bullet point about Hazou's mindset and motivation here. Maybe "Hazou is upset with Hana's actions towards Mari and unable to reconcile this with his love for his mother"

Right now, I see this going very poorly if Hazou has this discussion in form but not in spirit, due to some combination of being clueless and not wanting to betray his mother. Like, he casually mentions "Don't worry, I talked to Hana and got her to fix Mari" and then when Jiraiya presses for details or insinuates that Hana was at fault, Hazou gets flustered and/or defensive.
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Valid point. I'll add it.
Vecht said:
This seems ill-advised. Baring infosec breach when Hana dragged Mari outside, does anyone outside the clan know details about this right now? This could majorly come back to bite us. At minimum we should run it by Jiraiya.
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But... that's exactly what my plan is doing? It's in "suggestions for Jiraiya" section.

Should I make it clearer?
 
I'd like to see some more edits but am running low on time to adequately address them. Nothing too major.

[] Action Plan: A List of Bullet-Points Intended To Be Interpreted As A Set Of Instructions
 
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@Noumero

Advice: Optimize for word count be do not be overly stingy. While that +1 XP would be great if we wanted an additional utility jutsu, its not super valuable compared to an optimized plan.
 
@Vecht, added bullet point about Hazou's motivation and made the "implement provided agreement" bold. Review?
Noumero said:
Jiraiya:
  • Inform him about Mari's situation in full: Hana's involvement, our attempts to help, past experiences.
    • (Hazou is upset with Hana's actions, and struggles to reconcile them with his love for her.)
  • Suggestions (implement provided agreement):
    • Inform Anko and Neira about Mari's condition. Friends would help?
    • Mist Yakuza:
      • Cooperate on tournament betting.
      • Produce Casino Seals for sale (consult Keiko for quantity).
    • Tournament: practice choreographed fights (for teammate vs. teammate matches).
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MMKII said:
Advice: Optimize for word count be do not be overly stingy. While that +1 XP would be great if we wanted an additional utility jutsu, its super valuable compared to an optimized plan.
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Yes, I know. I recall I myself complained about people succumbing to perverse incentives and optimizing for wordcount instead of for planning effectiveness in the past. How ironic.
 
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Noumero said:
It's possible. What exact edits do you propose? @faflec?
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I think bringing in the story about how Hazou and Noburi nearly freaked out and killed a civilian is a good, "Yeah, we understand some small part of what you feel." (By the way, I'm not saying that Kagome doesn't know about this; just bringing it up in context.)

I am also rather attached to Hazou bluntly asking Kagome if Hazou compromises too much. Kagome has been well away from the ninja system for a long time. He's not steeped in 'do it for the good of the village' like everyone else is. I'd be fascinated to for once ask Kagome a question about ethics. Not what we must do or what makes us safe but what we should do.
 
Briefvoice said:
I think bringing in the story about how Hazou and Noburi nearly freaked out and killed a civilian is a good, "Yeah, we understand some small part of what you feel." (By the way, I'm not saying that Kagome doesn't know about this; just bringing it up in context.)

I am also rather attached to Hazou bluntly asking Kagome if Hazou compromises too much. Kagome has been well away from the ninja system for a long time. He's not steeped in 'do it for the good of the village' like everyone else is. I'd be fascinated to for once ask Kagome a question about ethics. Not what we must do or what makes us safe but what we should do.
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Story: added.
Ethics: I already have something similar, where Hazou asks Kagome's thoughts about our ideals and what we should focus on in the future. Is that meaningfully different?

See bold parts:
Noumero said:
If Kagome is willing, have a freeform discussion.
  • Kagome's plans/ambitions? How is he finding Leaf?
  • His thoughts about our ideals? What should we focus on?
  • Recount how Hazou and Noburi nearly killed a civilian after coming to Leaf. It puts Kagome's mindset into perspective.
  • Does he have the Akatsuki book, or its summary?
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Noumero said:
Ethics: I already have something similar, where Hazou asks Kagome's thoughts about our ideals and what we should focus on in the future. Is that meaningfully different?
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Note that I disagree strongly with @Briefvoice's sentiment (re: Hazou worried about "compromising"), and adding it will lose my vote.
 
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[x] Action Plan: A List of Bullet-Points Intended To Be Interpreted As A Set Of Instructions

This plan looks quite good at the moment. It doesn't have Hazou take the blame for everything and just apologise but also has him justify the reasoning behind his actions.

I am still hesitant of telling Jiraiya the complete story of Mari's situation as we can't predict how Jiraiya will react, but I doubt we're capable of hiding it from him anyway.
 
Briefvoice said:
If Team Kurenai had been ordered to accompany Minami on mission instead of our team, I would expect that Minami would still end up dead for the exact same reasons.
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I don't see how Team Kurenai could possibly have screwed up badly enough to make Jiraiya order Minami's death.
 
Wiadi said:
I don't see how Team Kurenai could possibly have screwed up badly enough to make Jiraiya order Minami's death.
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Well, if Hiashi was Hokage, and Hinata had let slip the exact range of the Byakugan or something, we can expect him to have killed Minami (and quite possibly the rest of the team) just like Jiraiya killed her.

Kiba said:
And why do people believe this nonsense?
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Mostly because that's what Velorien seemed to be implying when he said it was because of our decisions.
I didn't think it was true before, but Velorien seems to be implying it.
 
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DAKKA! said:
I am still hesitant of telling Jiraiya the complete story of Mari's situation as we can't predict how Jiraiya will react, but I doubt we're capable of hiding it from him anyway.
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What's the worst that could happen? Jiraiya throws Hana out of Leaf and she decides to have her Momma's boy make good on his promise to join her back to Mist? Where she is promptly assassinated and Hazou goes through "reeducation" in the Kurosawa clan compound, just long enough to perish along his blood-kin once Hokage Hiashi uses our own tech to bombard Mist into smithereens?

I don't see the problem :D.
 
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Kiba said:
And why do people believe this nonsense?
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I could go down a list of evidence and reasoning but your tone suggests you've already made up your mind so it'd probably be a waste of time. If you actually want an answer, lemme know & I'll try and put one together.
Sentient Tree said:
Well, if Hiashi was Hokage, and Hinata had let slip the exact range of the Byakugan or something, we can expect him to have killed Minami (and quite possibly the rest of the team) just like Jiraiya killed her.
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Fair, but that's a few more conditions on the counterfactual than Briefvoice had.
 
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