Voted best in category in the Users' Choice awards.
Also, uh. I have a headcanon for two of those things. If halflings are meant to the be the food-producers that keep the Ogres fed by Old One design, then it would make some sense for them to produce uh, copious fertilizer. All that food has to go somewhere and they eat so much that if they're actually absorbing it all they'd be round. So it's more likely that they are fermenting what they eat and then just dumping the waste onto the fields.

...

Yeah, I'm going to go ahead and use my tyrannical QM powers to declare the topic closed. I don't want to go to bed with it still bubbling and I don't think it's got anywhere worthwhile left to go from here.
 
Their organised crime is a bit more widespread than that. Basically, if a particular job doesn't have Halflings, the Quinsberry Lodge will fight to get halflings in it. Even if it means blackmail, slander, libel and threats. Their purpose is to ensure that Halflings are treated equally to humans and that they prosper as a people, and they will do anything to make sure that happens.
The omakes Torroar wrote for his quest regarding it are probably near the top quality wise. Real nice look at it.
 
...

Yeah, I'm going to go ahead and use my tyrannical QM powers to declare the topic closed. I don't want to go to bed with it still bubbling and I don't think it's got anywhere worthwhile left to go from here.
You lack the courage to embrace my solution to the Paradox Of The Conservation Of Halfling Mass /jk. But fuck you're right bed. I need bed. I am tired my head is dozy and the world feels like it's made of blankets smothering my brain.
 
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[X] Plan Disregard WEBMAT, Acquire AP
-[X] One Overwork Action
-[X] COIN: The Father
-[X] WEB-MAT: Hire someone as a full-time Gyrocopter pilot (Adela)
-[X] Lay the foundations: work with the current members of WEB-MAT and the Waystone Project to build a single unified framework for understanding the Waystones.
-[X] Attempt to bring a non-Order magical tradition into the Waystone Project (Nordlander Haléthan Hedgewise)
-[X] Attempt to bring a Major House or Ward into the Waystone Project (Tindomiel)
-[X] Branulhune's ability to disappear and reappear at a thought allows entirely new forms of combat. Continue to work on them.
-[X] Investigate how the Vitae reacts to a power stone.
-[X] EIC: Have the Hochlander set up a shadow headquarters for the EIC in the Sunken Palace.
-[X] KAU: Decide who your library staff will consist of, and go about recruiting them.
-[X] SERENITY: Write a book: Windsoak Mushrooms (1/2)
 
That's a nicer set of goals than most Mafias, so either their PR is great or they have suprisingly lofty morals, methods aside.
The Quinsberry Lodge's goal is admirable, which makes me so conflicted when I look at their methods, because some of the stuff they do is not pretty. On one hand, it's questionable whether they would have as much of an effect if they weren't as ruthless as they are. On the other hand, it's very hard to say that some of the stuff they do is absolutely necessary. They definitely have some "legbreaking" methods so to speak.
 
Quinsberry Lodge is "lucky" in that they have a genuine enemy to fight to justify their existence (and power).
Once things get better, the justifications will probably start get flimsier, and the methods more brutal.
Or they become the teamsters.
 
I'm not super familiar with 4e, but from what I've heard it sounds like they really ramped up the racial tensions between halflings and humans.

I'm not saying they weren't there before 4e, it just feels like 4e made it really prominent.
 
I'm not super familiar with 4e, but from what I've heard it sounds like they really ramped up the racial tensions between halflings and humans.

I'm not saying they weren't there before 4e, it just feels like 4e made it really prominent.
They also did it with Imperial Dwarves. There was barely anything on them in 2E, and 4E expanded on them, which includes an entire racial tensions period between the Drakwald Emperors and Magnus the Pious. They also added another deed to Magnus' rather impressive list of deeds, which is enshrining laws against Dwarf racism into the books.
 
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They also did it with Imperial Dwarves. There was barely anything on them in 2E, and 4E expanded on them, which includes an entire racial tensions period between the Drakwald Emperors and Magnus the Pious. They also added another deed to Magnus' rather impressive list of deeds, which is enshrining anti-Dwarf racism laws into the books.
By that you mean, laws protecting against anti-Dwarf racism?
 
It *would* be kind of hilarious for Magnus the Pious, paragon of virtue, to just randomly hate imperial dwarves for some reason.
There was only one instance in which he wasn't presented as a paragon. Apparently, Genevieve used to tell this story of her meeting Magnus the Pious as a bar maid, but it wasn't pleasant, because he apparently slapped her bum.

That was, like, the one time Magnus wasn't presented as an angel.

EDIT: To be exact, it was this: "She eventually returned to the Old World. In due course she met Magnus the Pious, who (she claims) tried to put his hand up her dress." from the Genevieve novels
 
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There was only one instance in which he wasn't presented as a paragon. Apparently, Genevieve used to tell this story of her meeting Magnus the Pious as a bar maid, but it wasn't pleasant, because he apparently slapped her bum.

That was, like, the one time Magnus wasn't presented as an angel.
Admittedly, it was a very nice, slappable bum :V

Disclaimer: i know it's no reason to slap bums without permission
 
By the way, Genevieve's wiki page is one hell of a ride. She was taught martial arts by a Cathayan master named Master Po, and my first thought being Kung Fu Panda, I went on a wiki dive to see that the root of both names is likely a reference to another Master Po. I don't know what it's about, but people must like referencing it.
 
By the way, Genevieve's wiki page is one hell of a ride. She was taught martial arts by a Cathayan master named Master Po, and my first thought being Kung Fu Panda, I went on a wiki dive to see that the root of both names is likely a reference to another Master Po. I don't know what it's about, but people must like referencing it.
Strikes me as a character with too much candy/cursed with awesome/ Sue-ish.

Her name too. God given. Did she give herself that name?
 
Strikes me as a character with too much candy/cursed with awesome/ Sue-ish.

Her name too. God given. Did she give herself that name?
I'm pretty sure that's the case for any Warhammer Fantasy book focusing on a character. You know that when you pick the book up that the focus character is going to be special and amazing. The only reason Gotrek gets away with it is because he wants to die, so him always coming out on top is supposed to be a bad thing.
 
I'm pretty sure that's the case for any Warhammer Fantasy book focusing on a character. You know that when you pick the book up that the focus character is going to be special and amazing. The only reason Gotrek gets away with it is because he wants to die, so him always coming out on top is supposed to be a bad thing.
It's also honestly just hilarious to see a Mary Sue character fighting their own Sueness.

A good leasure story entertains me, and Gotrek certainly does.
 
A Certain Lack of Distress
A Certain Lack of Distress

Soizic's hand gripped the pommel of her sword tightly as she swiveled her head to look for any discrepancies in the crowd. This wasn't the first time that she had been present for such an occasion in Karak Eight Peaks, but she was not General of the Undumgi last time, and there was certainly no bombing of the Okral to keep in mind. Soizic had a responsibility to stay sharp. As much as she wanted to relax and have some leisure time with Hubert, her duties called to her. There would not be any sort of disruption to the proceedings. Soizic staked her honor and her life on that promise, and she would make sure she fulfilled it.

"Soizic Le Beau I take it? A pleasure to meet you." A voice called out from beyond Soizic's peripheral vision. She had not heard anyone approaching her, and it was only a split second of internal reproach for her mistake before she swiftly turned about face to come face to face with the voice, her hands ready to draw.

The sight to greet her made her tense briefly before she forced herself to relax, her courtly training instantly coming to the fore, she performed a standard bow befitting the station of the woman facing her. None other than a Damsel of the Lady, dressed in the standard outfit yet modified to enhance her… assets. A move that was relatively common for the Damsels back home. They did not care for the standards of propriety within Bretonnia, and flaunted its rules as they were given the right to do so.

"Greetings, Milady. It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance."

"Oh please, Ser Knight, dispense with the formalities. We are not in Bretonnia, no? No need to keep up pretences"

They also had a streak of individuality that made it easy to recognise them quite easily. As Soizic straighten out of her bow, she took note of the many small and subtle modifications to the Damsel's outfit that marked out who she was. She could see the Sword sigil of Carcassone sown into her dress. While Damsels were technically not supposed to be tied to any one Dukedom, they were more than free to show a degree of pride in their home, and could show it in the little touches to their outfit. From the subtle markings to the Carcassone sigil, her hair style, tied into twin braids, her hair colour, a sandy blonde, and her fondness for Emeralds and her green dress, Soizic had a good idea who she was.

Sharlotta, the Lady of Lovarre. She knew of her, and the tales of De Raker relieving Tilea's siege on the small fortress settlement. Most Damsels did not retain much, if any connection to the family they were born in, but if a Damsel of the Lady desired to protect a town under siege alongside a Grail Knight, then who was to stop her? Perhaps Soizic should be relieved to know that the Damsel she was meeting was one who was willing to "break the rules" so to speak, but that did not much ease her nerves.

"What is it you desire milady? I am no longer a Knight of the Realm, so I doubt there is much to speak of." Despite her nervousness, Soizic maintained a stoic expression with absolutely no waver in her voice. She knew that a time would come in which she would be face to face with her past, but she had no idea that it would arrive so unannounced.

"There is no need to fret my dear. I am not here to question your decisions. I am under no order or obligation to do so. I am simply curious over your achievements, impressive as they are. Are you not one of the major players that have allowed for this wedding to happen? I am led to believe that the Karaz Ankor would be a distant entity for Karak Azul were it not for the glorious retaking of K8P?" Sharlottas emerald eyes twinkled in the light, a mischievous expression clearly hiding behind that veil she wore. Soizic could not help but feel that she was laid bare before those eyes, as if she could not hide anything from her

"Ah, er, that is to say.." Soizic cleared her throat, regaining her composure. "What I mean to say is that I was merely a vessel for Belegar's will, and that were it not for the skills of my allies and the many, many soldiers that fought by our side, we would not have gotten anywhere. I understand that many of the tactics employed by my King would be seen as… dishonorable by milady's standards, but they were quite effective. If you want to ask of the… "major players", so to speak, then I could introduce you to King Belegar, Runelord Kragg, or Lady Mathilde? They are widely considered to be the heroes of that tale. I am simply the General of the Undumgi."

Sharlotta let out a thoughtful hum, her gaze turning considering, but never shedding that amused glint. Soizic felt herself sweating under that glance, feeling as if she was being eyed for lunch by a cat. Soizic felt mildly guilty that she would be siccing such an intimidating figure on someone else, but she was sure Belegar, Kragg and certainly Mathilde would be more than capable of handling her vaguely domineering behavior.

"I have heard much of this King Belegar. Runelord Kragg is well known to those who dabble in magics, for he is known as one of the best enchanters of this age. Lady Mathilde… Well that's a name that inspires some disappointment. She came over to us in Carcassonne you know? Asked to host the Waystone Project in our lands. We gave our terms to her, but it seems she didn't find them agreeable. A shame really, I heard many good things about her." Sharlotta took a pause to take a sip from her chalice (Soizic noted that the liquid flowed into the veil somehow).

"But enough of that, we are here to speak of more pleasant topics, yes? I'm quite curious of your adventures. Please tell me everything, and spare no details." Soizic suppressed a gulp and prayed to the Lady for salvation.

It wasn't quite unpleasant, merely uncomfortable, to speak to the Damsel. She had an air of curiosity to her, yet she also exuded a terrifying aura that made you want to tell her everything, something that Soizic had no intention of doing. There were some things she wanted to keep private, such as her relationship with an Ulrican Journeyman Noble. Soizic tried her best to deflect back at the Damsel, and while her eyes told her that she saw exactly what Soizic was doing, she seemed to comply, and the conversation slowly morphed into a more equal one, as they conversed of topics relating to their current homes.

Soizic wondered, perhaps, when these mountains had become her home. Her goal was to be a Questing Knight, going around the world fighting injustices and defeating the Lady's enemies. She had hoped to be acknowledged by the Lady and become a Grail Knight, returning to Bretonnia in glory to prove to all that no accident of birth would prevent her from being a Knight. Yet the longer she remained within Karak Eight Peaks, the greater her desire to simply… stay, was becoming. K8P was a pleasant place, a place where she was not judged for being a woman. It was a far more freeing and comforting place than Bretonnia had ever been to her. There was no matter of class or race within the Undumgi. You attained your position through sheer merit, and there was nothing that appealed to Soizic more than that.

The more she remained in K8P, the more Soizic realised how much she was missing out. She had not decided to give up her Quest or her devotion to the Lady, that much was proven by her recent vision, adventure and blessing. She had felt the comforting embrace of the Lady and was determined to take a sip of the Lady's chalice. She was simply unsure if that meant leaving her new home.

Soizic had a niggling thought. Here was a Damsel of the Lady. Clearly she could ask her the burning questions that were tearing through her mind as of late.

It only took a single glance at those piercing green eyes of Sharlottas to immediately second-guess her decision.

It was then that Soizic saw her shining ray of hope. Her saving grace.

"Oh, it looks like Lady Mathilde wishes to speak with you." Soizic hoped she didn't sound too eager to be rid of her present company.

Sharlotta glanced sideways to see Mathilde holding a cup close by. She was taking a sip, wrinkling her nose at whatever she just drank, and looking thoughtfully at the Damsel. Well, Soizic assumed it was thoughtfully, she couldn't quite decipher Mathilde's glances. Soizic guessed that it was anywhere between "plotting to kill you" and "wanting to have an enlightening conversation". Hubert always said that was part of her charm, her odd inscrutable nature that only her girlfriend could accurately decipher.

"So it would seem. Well, it's been pleasant chatting with you Ser, I quite hope we meet again." Sharlotta held her hand out for Soizic.

"Likewise." Soizic took up the hand for a (perhaps too) quick kiss and moved on. She hoped to never meet that woman again.

Soizic desperately needed stress relief. Once this reception was over, she was going to find Hubert, and make sure he couldn't walk properly tomorrow.

Author's Note: I'm back on medication, and that means a sudden burst of inspiration. I have no idea what to title this unfortunately.
 
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