On second thought, as much as he would enjoy two Mistos after him (and not in anger), he seems the type to register that one does not engage in relation with someone who is drunk even if they would be more than happy to when sober.
This was another one that went in unexpected directions. The backing frame we're using here is 'The SIRP Pilots are popped over to the A&T-verse in some Leliel-shenanigans', which produces a mismatch, since the Pilot of Unit-03 is either Mari (who does not exist at all in A&T, as far as we know), and Kaworu or Hikari Horaki on the other. So what we ended up with was Mari getting to meet A&T!Kaworu. Mari gets to meet the analogue of her closest friend, and A&T-Kaworu meets... a crazy girl he has never heard of.
It did not go as expected. Mari thought she'd just have fun messing with a boy she thought she knew well, but A&T!Kaworu is in a not-happy place, thanks to Arael's mind-rape. The result was unexpectedly revealing for them both.
Spoilered for length, and for revealing some aspects of Kaworu's state of mind that are a bit 'ahead of schedule' versus what's been revealed in A&T. It will come up in the regular update coming tonight, so just skip reading for now if you don't want it revealed just yet. Though what he's thinking isn't very new, it's just much starker now. Arael was... harsh.
*SCENE OPENS*
"So, let me get this straight. You have no idea who I am?"
"Not a bit." Kaworu regarded the alarmingly energetic girl cautiously. "I don't recall ever meeting a 'Mari' of any sort."
"Well, then!"
Mari approaches Kaworu with a feral grin, like a cheetah stalking a gazelle. Her nostrils widen in a predatory sniff.
She effortlessly slips under the boy's guard and hugs him from behind, pressing their bodies together.
"So, how is my favorite half-Angel?" she murmurs in his ear. "How is the apocalypse going? Did you pre-arrange to get killed by someone if you give it a try?"
"Eeeberyeebleyabble!" He is taut as a board.
"Wait wait wait! What?! I... I..." He is now also frozen mentally.
....alas, parts of him that are more embarrassing are also rather stiff.
Kaworu.exe has encountered an error, and needs to reboot.
Mari grins, her plan to confuse the boy in at least five distinct ways apparently bearing fruit.
She slightly relaxes her hold and waits for him to get some control over his tongue back.
"I I I I I I I I apologize for my body's.... reaction!" he gabbles after a long, excruciatingly embarrassing moment. His brain has not yet gotten as far as even trying to pull away from the hug, particularly as most of his body is enjoying it.
"Please do not slap me!"
Mari openly giggles, finally letting go.
"It's fine. I just wanted to cut through the awkwardness with some mega-awkwardness."
"Now, do you or do you not have an Apocalypse Buddy?"
Kaworu looks down. "This is going to take some time to subside." He looks helplessly at her. "I.... you know?"
"You know a Kaworu, and he has told you? Of...what we are?"
"I am your Apocalypse Buddy in my world," Mari says a little proudly. "If you fail to resist the Call, I'm the one who has to stop you."
"Well, and the others too, but I was first."
He stares at her, looking mildly frightened. He swallows. "....Ayanami has promised she will... make it quick and painless, if she has to. And that she will mourn me."
"I've told no one else. I am... afraid to."
Mari nods.
"That's cool. It took me a while to tell them I was a European spy."
"When you know them enough and trust them enough...you'll know it's time."
He nods. "I... want to tell them. I want to trust them. I... like them. They've been kind to me, and... watching Shinji find happiness is... beautiful."
"But I... know how this ends. I... can see other worlds. I've seen my death a thousand times."
"Or worse, my victory."
"Oh, yeah?" Mari's intrigued. "That's a new one."
"Can you see my world?"
"Probably? I... see many. How would I pick yours out? What is... distinctive? I..." He squints. "I have seen a girl like you before, but... not often. You are... new? Unusual? Sometimes you are older, like Doctor Akagi's age."
"In most of them, I die."
"Most of them? That's..."
Mari shakes her head.
"In the ones you die...do you have friends?"
"....sometimes. Sometimes Shinji is my friend, for as long as I have. He... usually does not take it well when I... yield to the Call. I am still grateful that he kills me."
"You are friends with your Nagisa?"
Mari nods enthusiastically.
"That's...good. Um... are you... dating him?"
Mari bursts into laughter. She laughs so hard she cries and has to wipe her eyes with her sleeve several times.
"I take it this means the idea is rather silly to you?" Kaworu looks a bit let down. "So much for that being the thing to 'look' for amongst my visions."
"Nothing personal. It's just that...how do I explain it? You can see souls, right?"
"Can you see mine?"
Mari steps back, spreading her arms wide.
"I can. And...hear them, as well. Like music." He sounds uncomfortable with the idea that more people know. He focuses on her.
"You are...bright and... not exactly 'loud', but... vigorous. And yes, very different from myself. Though that's somewhat expected, as I am... rather uniquely souled."
"Right. That kind of...reflects in dating preferences."
"Kaworu's usually into the lonely, forlorn types."
"And I'm...not looking for anything serious."
"Definitely not as serious as we would be if we did get together."
"....you have no idea how heartening that is. That... I could even have that. Serious. Intense. ....Real."
Mari nods, steps closer, and puts a hand on Kaworu's chest.
"You deserve to be loved."
"I just....don't want to put my heart somewhere it can get broken so easily."
He looks away. "Thank you anyway. It's... encouraging to know that you would even consider it. I imagine he... has told you how alone it feels. To be... me."
Mari shakes her head. "He's not alone. Not anymore. Misato and all the pilots...we're all as close as family."
"I don't know how that translates to romantic prospects...but I think we make beautiful music together."
"....is your Ayanami... seeing anyone?"
"Not my Kaworu. He said they could have ended up as anything, including lovers, but that's just not how it worked out."
"She and Shinji got together."
"It's adorable."
He wilts a bit. "That is... good. They both deserve happiness. But what about Miss Soryu? They are... intensely happy here, together. I have 'seen' what she is like when alone. It is not good."
"Ace? She's...okay, I guess. She took it kind of hard at first, but Misato helped defuse the situation."
"Ayanami and your Nagisa are at least friends, I hope?"
"Friends, yeah. Maybe not super close."
"I think the Adam-Lilith thing makes things...awkward."
"Ayanami is my friend here. I....yes, it does. I... wish it did not."
"Everything would be so much easier if I was not... me."
Mari shrugs.
"Maybe, but then you wouldn't be you. You'd be someone else."
"So from your subjective viewpoint it wouldn't be easier at all."
"Unlikely I'd be someone fighting the Call every moment, or wishing I was not myself so I didn't have to fight the simultaneous urges to kill and mate with my only friend!" he bursts out. "Or have to talk myself out of suicide and omnicide every fucking day!"
He wilts back. "....I'm sorry. It's... been bad lately."
"You're scared of dying?" Mari's face shows concern. "You got hit by the mindrape Angel, didn't you?"
He nods, jerkily. "I tried to shield Re-... Ayanami. The Positron Cannon did nothing. She was screaming. My AT-Field barely slowed it down for 2 seconds. Then... it had me."
"Every nightmare vision of my death, all the bad ones.... worlds where I killed Shinji first. Or Rei. Or everyone."
He shivers.
Mari moves in to hug him again, this time much more gently.
"It was the same for him."
"He used to be philosophical about death. After the Angel hit him...he got afraid."
"He's trying to distract himself by doing crazy things."
Mari smiles, a little crookedly.
"I encourage him."
"Thank you." He hardly reacts to the hug this time. "It's best if I... end soon. Better for everyone," he says low and calm.
"Before I can't...stop."
"Can you end it?"
"I thought SEELE would just bring you back?"
"It depends on...how I do it. Rei can...make sure."
"I've... tried other ways. The Call won't let me."
Mari squeezes a little harder.
"Look, I'm not going to tell you not to kill yourself."
"But...you have people who will miss you."
"People you need to help protect."
"It hurts."
"Every day."
"I don't want to feel like this anymore."
His arms wrap almost...no, no almost. Definitely desperately around hers.
"I can't tell anyone but Rei or they'll hate me or try to kill me and she's hurt and I saw myself killing them all and I.... can't hold on."
Mari shrugs.
"Cry me a river. I don't want to think about what it's going to be like in seventy years when I can barely walk by myself."
"It keeps me up at night sometimes, but I'm not thinking about killing myself."
"...anymore."
He jerks up. "No! You're... why? You're normal! You're alive! You have... everything!"
"Because," Mari explains patiently. "An Angel fucked with my head."
"Same as you."
"Made me see things that are technically true."
"And to feel bad about them."
"And you have... everyone on your team to talk to?"
"The first night after the Angel we all slept in the living room."
"And screamed."
"Humans and half-Angels alike."
"So what you have in your head right now...it has barely anything to do with your actual problems."
"Trust me."
"It was there before. It's just... in sharper relief now. It mostly showed me memories. And... I've seen so many worlds. It almost never... ends well."
"I just don't... see a way out that isn't... asking Ayanami or... you, to just... cut to the end."
"I asked her out, you know? Badly. But... I meant it."
"I feel... less alone with her. And... um... Lilim 'urges' block the Call."
"Based on your mood, I'm guessing...wait, they do? Are you sure?"
He blushes and looks well away from Mari's legs. "V-very. The first time Ayanami grabbed me and held me close like you did I... um... reacted. And it blocked it, for as long as... those thoughts lasted."
"....still happening."
"Is it warm in here?"
Even Mari blushes a little.
"I-in my defense, you are... um..." He searches for the right word. "....yummy?"
"Do...other thoughts work?"
"Gluttony? Sloth?"
"Rage?"
"Ah...so far just... lust. I have not tried the others much. I think gluttony does, a little. But... the urge to mate is... very intrinsic to the Lilim form. It...cuts right past even the subconscious. I think that's why it works. 'Root access', so to speak."
"And... Ayanami is... exciting when angry."
"And you can tell these things for sure? You can feel the Call all the time?"
"Always. Except when I am..." he dribbles off into embarrassed mutters something like 'thinking of Ayanami'.
"I'm...trying to figure out if you two...work the same way," Mari explains.
"Because if you do...some pretty drastic measures may need to be taken once I'm back home."
"...I think we should roughly work the same? Our flesh should be highly similar. There are limited ways SEELE could have altered things, and still kept us viable."
"Your team... all know about Ayanami and I, correct?"
"Okay. So...if NERV drafts several dozen women, working around the clock..."
"I assume physical exhaustion also works..."
"I'm sorry, what?"
Kaworu's eyes bug out. "What are you planning?!"
"You just said there's a 100% certain way to block the Call, right?"
"We've done crazier things to stop an Angel."
Kaworu gibbers unintelligibly for a moment. "It... it does not have to be like that!"
"When I... um... use that method, there is a....um... 'lag time' afterwards. It's not... look, I need to sleep sometimes, and that helps me... relax."
"....suddenly I am very glad Ayanami is not here to hear this."
"Or Shinji-kun. Or...anyone."
Mari deflates.
"Sorry. I thought...I thought there was a way to definitely save you."
Kaworu looks stricken. "I... don't know. It works as a stopgap, at least. Buys time. I just don't know how... to do any more than that."
"....though...."
"It's not just the lust. It's... the rest, too. I felt... strong enough to hold it at bay for a long time, when Ayanami... held me. Told me I was... her friend. And that if I was not... what I am, she would... not immediately reject the idea of us...as more."
"I...really don't know about any of this. I don't think my Kaworu feels the Call 24/7 the way you do."
"...Unless he's been lying to protect my feelings, in which case I'm going to rip all his hair out."
"He might be... different. How old is he?"
"About my age? SEELE didn't age him up in the tube, if that's what you mean."
"I am 5 months, 18 days, 9 hours, and 27 minutes old. If he has had more time at greater distance to... learn to control it, he might consciously feel it less."
Mari sighs.
"...which means I can't ever tell if the things that help you would help him too."
"You say that things almost never end well. That means sometimes they do, right?"
"I...can only remember a couple of worlds where it does not end in my death or everyone else's. And those worlds are... very different than ours."
"...in one Shinji and I are detectives."
"Is there anything they have in common?"
Kaworu's smile is wan. "There usually are no Angels. Or at least, very different, smaller ones. Not like these."
"There are only... a tiny number where there are, and I do not... fall."
"And those ones... I..." He looks away. "I am stopped by..."
"....love."
"...I'm guessing love for manufactured objects doesn't count?"
"No."
"The only one I can remember clearly, it was... Shinji-kun. He... talked me down. When I was on the way to Terminal Dogma. His love was... stronger than the Call."
"But that's one world out of hundreds. Thousands."
".....manufactured objects?" He swerves back.
"Yeah! It should be totally valid!"
"It's an...attachment you have to the world."
"Why should it count less than romance?"
"I...suppose? I don't think I've ever seen an attachment that strong, however."
"Like you said, you probably haven't been around long enough. My Kaworu...he has a minor obsession with the things Lilim make."
"Because only Lilim make them. It takes the...Fruit of Knowledge to build a machine that builds machines that build things for you."
"Does that do anything for you?"
"I... have the same... thing, sort of. I cannot... create like Lilim can."
"I can play a concerto just fine, but I cannot write a new one, for example."
"And the fact that Shinji-kun can is... fascinating."
"I literally cannot understand how he does it."
"But I watched him do it. Just... sit down, and write it. Out of nothing!"
"Right. So...did that help with your Call any?"
"A very small amount, I think. It did distract me a little. But thinking of R- Ayanami in her underwear is more... um... effective."
"...noted."
"Let's drop this for now. How is everyone else?"
Kaworu's smile is more genuine now. "Shinji-kun... I have never seen him this happy. He and Miss Soryu are... the finest symphonies in the world are pale imitations of their Song. That is part of why I am... firm on not giving in to the Call. I cannot bear to... break their harmony. Ayanami is... a friend. Who has promised to help me. Horaki-san is... gracious. She allows me to Pilot her Unit-03 without fuss."
"She is dating Suzuhara-san, here."
"Oh yeah, that one. She tells me to listen in class more."
"...I'm not a very disciplined student."
Kaworu snorts. A laugh escapes him. It grows, until he is holding his sides and laughing until he's crying.
"Really? I hadn't imagined! Ahahahaha!"
"Hey, I'm smart. Do you know how many languages I can speak? I just...learn by doing."
"As do I. German, Japanese, English, Russian, and Urdu. You?"
"Not Urdu. But also Chinese, Spanish, Arabic, and French."
"Anyway, on my end, things are going...okay."
"We're all working together to stop SEELE and Gendo."
"And...everyone knows everything."
"No more secrets."
"I...envy you."
"Only Ayanami knows of me. And I her. We are both... too afraid of what SEELE or NERV might do if we said any more."
"Yeah. When they figured out how much Misato was influencing you...they slapped a bomb collar on your neck."
Kaworu's eyes widen. "A what?!"
"I don't think they were going to set it off. It was just a 'fuck you' to her."
Kaworu nervously touches his neck. "It... wouldn't hurt anyone else, would it?"
"Well, not anymore. Misato's had it disabled."
"....could I have it?"
"...maybe."
He winces.
"I could... give the trigger to Shinji-kun. I could trust him to... do what I asked."
"Would it stop you? If you were at full power?"
"I think so. My Core, my S2 Organ, are here," he taps his throat, right on his Adam's Apple, "And a focused blast there should... break them. End me."
"Very definitely if I did not attempt to block it with an AT-Field."
"If you really want to give him a way to kill you...I say just talk to him."
"You said you die in most worlds anyway, right? So if the others are ready for you, that should be more than safe enough."
"I don't think SEELE can afford to hurt them for knowing. Not at this juncture."
"It took all of us to stop the last Angel."
"We are... not so lucky here, I think. We already have more Pilots than Evangelions, and I am positive Commander Ikari knows what I am. Ayanami said she had to tell them."
"And... I know there is only one other Angel left besides me."
"I suspect SEELE and NERV know this too."
"That's...rough. I guess it's risky, then. Still, if I had to pick? I'd want to know."
"I... want to tell them. Shinji-kun and Miss Soryu, at least. They might... accept it. I... do not think Major Katsuragi would be as... open. She loves her Children... but hates the Angels as much."
Mari shrugs. "Start with that, then. If your Shinji is anything like ours, he's not going to be able to hate someone who basically took a bullet for Rei."
"He... I think he might, yes. Accept us. It's just... aside from the danger from SEELE and NERV.... well, our Shinji-kun is a terrible liar. Once he and Miss Soryu know, I do not think they can conceal that from Major Katsuragi for long."
"Our Misato has been like a mother to all of us. The best one ever. Even to you. But...I don't want to make assumptions. This is a different world."
"But...your judgment is impaired too, right?"
"Because the Angel made you hurt?"
"...possibly. Our Major is... she has been very kind, but I am a recent arrival, and still quite an outsider. Ayanami says they suspect me of being SEELE's creature. Right of them to do so, but I do not know how to elide that without revealing everything."
"And yes. I think. I am... up until yesterday I was still bleeding from the nose and ears from the aftereffects of the Angel's attack."
Mari sighs.
"I wish I had answers for you."
"You're just making me all confused. That's supposed to be my job."
Kaworu laughs again, a little sadder. "You are helping anyhow, Miss Makinami. That you and your Nagisa are close friends, and you do not automatically reject the concept that there could be more is encouraging me more than almost anything I have heard in weeks. Months."
"That more is possible."
"I'm happy to hear there might be a way to save you. Both of you."
"Even if I'm still figuring out a way to Katsuragi it."
He nods. "Between you and our Ayanami, I... have hope, sometimes. Or at least, the confidence that they will stop me, if nothing else."
"There's just... still times where the Call feels so right...."
"It is literally my purpose in existing."
Mari shakes her head.
"Nah. That's just some...leftover Angelic instinct. Same as the kind Lilim get telling them to eat sugar."
"Your existence is an abomination. It has no purpose, because it was never supposed to happen."
"Which means you're free to forge your own path."
"Isn't that right, 'Tabris'?"
He winces again. "My title is more than a little bitterly ironic. The Angel of Free Will, who has no choice."
He sighs. "I don't know. Maybe."
"I can choose, yes. But... I have to consciously do so, over and over, constantly. It's like... trying to clench a muscle, and then never relax it."
Mari screws up her face.
"Nngh. I hate talking about this stuff."
"Instead do you want to hear about some of the things I've tricked you into doing?"
He smiles, honestly. "Please do. I have not lived long enough to have made friends like you and he sound like. And it is obscurely pleasing to hear stories of a world where I have." "Okay. So, like I said, you've been on an Anti-Buddhism kick lately. And you asked me for fashion advice..."
Spoilered for length, and for revealing some aspects of Kaworu's state of mind that are a bit 'ahead of schedule' versus what's been revealed in A&T. It will come up in the regular update coming tonight, so just skip reading for now if you don't want it revealed just yet. Though what he's thinking isn't very new, it's just much starker now. Arael was... harsh.
Mari approaches Kaworu with a feral grin, like a cheetah stalking a gazelle. Her nostrils widen in a predatory sniff.
She effortlessly slips under the boy's guard and hugs him from behind, pressing their bodies together.
"So, how is my favorite half-Angel?" she murmurs in his ear. "How is the apocalypse going? Did you pre-arrange to get killed by someone if you give it a try?"
"I I I I I I I I apologize for my body's.... reaction!" he gabbles after a long, excruciatingly embarrassing moment. His brain has not yet gotten as far as even trying to pull away from the hug, particularly as most of his body is enjoying it.
"Please do not slap me!"
Mari openly giggles, finally letting go.
"It's fine. I just wanted to cut through the awkwardness with some mega-awkwardness."
"Now, do you or do you not have an Apocalypse Buddy?"
Kaworu looks down. "This is going to take some time to subside." He looks helplessly at her. "I.... you know?"
"You know a Kaworu, and he has told you? Of...what we are?"
"I am your Apocalypse Buddy in my world," Mari says a little proudly. "If you fail to resist the Call, I'm the one who has to stop you."
"Well, and the others too, but I was first."
He stares at her, looking mildly frightened. He swallows. "....Ayanami has promised she will... make it quick and painless, if she has to. And that she will mourn me."
"I've told no one else. I am... afraid to."
Mari nods.
"That's cool. It took me a while to tell them I was a European spy."
"When you know them enough and trust them enough...you'll know it's time."
"But I... know how this ends. I... can see other worlds. I've seen my death a thousand times."
"Or worse, my victory."
"Oh, yeah?" Mari's intrigued. "That's a new one."
"Can you see my world?"
"Probably? I... see many. How would I pick yours out? What is... distinctive? I..." He squints. "I have seen a girl like you before, but... not often. You are... new? Unusual? Sometimes you are older, like Doctor Akagi's age."
1. A world reshaped by Kaworu...
2. Damn. So much for him peeking in on SIRP.
3. This gives me the idea of A&T!Kaworu reviewing different pieces/adaptations/fanfic of Evangelion. It'd be a bit difficult, keeping in character, but it should provide some interesting and humorous moments.
4. Mari no happy.
"....sometimes. Sometimes Shinji is my friend, for as long as I have. He... usually does not take it well when I... yield to the Call. I am still grateful that he kills me."
"You are friends with your Nagisa?"
Mari nods enthusiastically.
"That's...good. Um... are you... dating him?"
Mari bursts into laughter. She laughs so hard she cries and has to wipe her eyes with her sleeve several times.
"I take it this means the idea is rather silly to you?" Kaworu looks a bit let down. "So much for that being the thing to 'look' for amongst my visions."
1. SIRP!Mari and SIRP!Kaworu aren't going to be dating... shit.
2. Just look for the inn and Misato giving her children a bunch of hugs. If you need more, I can provide additional details.
"You are...bright and... not exactly 'loud', but... vigorous. And yes, very different from myself. Though that's somewhat expected, as I am... rather uniquely souled."
1. 'Bright and vigorous'=He's totally hearing rave music. That or Pop.
2. Not exactly comfortable with people knowing what you can do A&T!Kaworu? That'll make things problematic.
1. So that explains why SIRP!Kaworu won't be interested in Asuka. She's not lonley, and definitely not sad. She's more angry than sad.
2. A&T!Kaworu, if Shinji and Asuka have anything to say about it, you will.
1. A bit of an expansion into what we already knew about SIRP!Mari: Her flippancy is a barrier to her heart.
2. And way to give A&T!Kaworu a kick to the self-esteem SIRP!Mari. You know his whole thing is 'don't rock the relationship boat', and he just said he'd like to be in one. How do you think telling him he'll easily break his partner's heart will go?
He looks away. "Thank you anyway. It's... encouraging to know that you would even consider it. I imagine he... has told you how alone it feels. To be... me."
Mari shakes her head. "He's not alone. Not anymore. Misato and all the pilots...we're all as close as family."
"I don't know how that translates to romantic prospects...but I think we make beautiful music together."
"Not my Kaworu. He said they could have ended up as anything, including lovers, but that's just not how it worked out."
"She and Shinji got together."
"It's adorable."
He wilts a bit. "That is... good. They both deserve happiness. But what about Miss Soryu? They are... intensely happy here, together. I have 'seen' what she is like when alone. It is not good."
"Ace? She's...okay, I guess. She took it kind of hard at first, but Misato helped defuse the situation."
1. Good to know that route wouldn't have ended in destroying the planet.
2. Hey, you wanna go over there and do something about that? With the right introduction, I don't think SIRP!Asuka would say no.
3. And confirmation we've gotten SIRP!Asuka past that... more or less.
"Everything would be so much easier if I was not... me."
Mari shrugs.
"Maybe, but then you wouldn't be you. You'd be someone else."
"So from your subjective viewpoint it wouldn't be easier at all."
"Unlikely I'd be someone fighting the Call every moment, or wishing I was not myself so I didn't have to fight the simultaneous urges to kill and mate with my only friend!" he bursts out. "Or have to talk myself out of suicide and omnicide every fucking day!"
He wilts back. "....I'm sorry. It's... been bad lately."
"You're scared of dying?" Mari's face shows concern. "You got hit by the mindrape Angel, didn't you?"
1. SIRP!Mari does philosophy. Huh.
2. Aaaaaand there's the thing Strypgia spoiled this over. Oh dear.
3. Given how bad A&T!Kaworu was going before the A&T!Angel attack, I don't want to think how he'd take the SIRP!mindrape angel.
He nods, jerkily. "I tried to shield Re-... Ayanami. The Positron Cannon did nothing. She was screaming. My AT-Field barely slowed it down for 2 seconds. Then... it had me."
"Every nightmare vision of my death, all the bad ones.... worlds where I killed Shinji first. Or Rei. Or everyone."
He shivers.
Mari moves in to hug him again, this time much more gently.
"It was the same for him."
"He used to be philosophical about death. After the Angel hit him...he got afraid."
"He's trying to distract himself by doing crazy things."
"So what you have in your head right now...it has barely anything to do with your actual problems."
"Trust me."
"It was there before. It's just... in sharper relief now. It mostly showed me memories. And... I've seen so many worlds. It almost never... ends well."
"I just don't... see a way out that isn't... asking Ayanami or... you, to just... cut to the end."
"I asked her out, you know? Badly. But... I meant it."
"I feel... less alone with her. And... um... Lilim 'urges' block the Call."
"Based on your mood, I'm guessing...wait, they do? Are you sure?"
He blushes and looks well away from Mari's legs. "V-very. The first time Ayanami grabbed me and held me close like you did I... um... reacted. And it blocked it, for as long as... those thoughts lasted."
1. And SIRP!Mari seizes on an idea to save both A&T! and SIRP!Kaworu.
2. And Lilium indulgence still helps... sort of.
3. No. That's just you and SIRP!Mari.
"I-in my defense, you are... um..." He searches for the right word. "....yummy?"
"Do...other thoughts work?"
"Gluttony? Sloth?"
"Rage?"
"Ah...so far just... lust. I have not tried the others much. I think gluttony does, a little. But... the urge to mate is... very intrinsic to the Lilim form. It...cuts right past even the subconscious. I think that's why it works. 'Root access', so to speak."
1. Sure, let's go with that.
2. Hrm... all Angels do have violence on the brain, so I suppose that is not enough of a differentiation.
3. I really think A&T!Kaworu'd like SIRP!Asuka. All that tsundere rage.
"...I think we should roughly work the same? Our flesh should be highly similar. There are limited ways SEELE could have altered things, and still kept us viable."
1. @SeptimusMagisto, you are not putting us or SIRP!Misato through the awkwardness of buying our son a harem of prostitutes! For one thing Squishy'd lose his goddamn mind.
2. Sleep though... that might be something to pursue.
3. Too late. The Misato party just got the details. SIRP!Misato is going to have words with SIRP!Mari. The others... have mixed reactions.
Kaworu looks stricken. "I... don't know. It works as a stopgap, at least. Buys time. I just don't know how... to do any more than that."
"....though...."
"It's not just the lust. It's... the rest, too. I felt... strong enough to hold it at bay for a long time, when Ayanami... held me. Told me I was... her friend. And that if I was not... what I am, she would... not immediately reject the idea of us...as more."
"About my age? SEELE didn't age him up in the tube, if that's what you mean."
"I am 5 months, 18 days, 9 hours, and 27 minutes old. If he has had more time at greater distance to... learn to control it, he might consciously feel it less."
"The only one I can remember clearly, it was... Shinji-kun. He... talked me down. When I was on the way to Terminal Dogma. His love was... stronger than the Call."
"But that's one world out of hundreds. Thousands."
A&T!Kaworu? Remember all the comments I made about you hurting Shinji by making him kill you after you got in a relationship with him?
YOU PULL A STUNT LIKE THAT, AND THEY RETURN TENFOLD!
"You're just making me all confused. That's supposed to be my job."
Kaworu laughs again, a little sadder. "You are helping anyhow, Miss Makinami. That you and your Nagisa are close friends, and you do not automatically reject the concept that there could be more is encouraging me more than almost anything I have heard in weeks. Months."
"That more is possible."
"I'm happy to hear there might be a way to save you. Both of you."
"Even if I'm still figuring out a way to Katsuragi it."
"Instead do you want to hear about some of the things I've tricked you into doing?"
He smiles, honestly. "Please do. I have not lived long enough to have made friends like you and he sound like. And it is obscurely pleasing to hear stories of a world where I have."
"Okay. So, like I said, you've been on an Anti-Buddhism kick lately. And you asked me for fashion advice..."
He doesn't like it, actually. He is increasingly tormented by having that kind of happiness dangled just out of reach. He really wants to hold her like that, and take a leap of faith and feeling... but knows there's a thousand reasons why that's an impossible, bad idea.
He's still in the same frame of mind as Rei: "If I tell people I care about, SEELE or NERV might kill them for knowing." So Mari already knowing immediately makes him worry for her safety. There's also the fear of rejection behind things.
2. And way to give A&T!Kaworu a kick to the self-esteem SIRP!Mari. You know his whole thing is 'don't rock the relationship boat', and he just said he'd like to be in one. How do you think telling him he'll easily break his partner's heart will go?
That's not what Kaworu took from it. Mari just said they couldn't just have a casual relationship. That if they tried, because they're so close, it would be deep, real, and intense... and Mari doesn't want to risk a close friendship on the chance it might not work. Mari's not going to go for it because it would really be betting everything, emotionally. That's why A&T!Kaworu was so encouraged to hear it: That Mari had thought about it, and decided against it to preserve the friendship they have, not because Kaworu's half-Angel. But she had considered it, and that made him very happy.
2. Hey, you wanna go over there and do something about that? With the right introduction, I don't think SIRP!Asuka would say no.
3. And confirmation we've gotten SIRP!Asuka past that... more or less.
Eeehhhh no. A&T!Kaworu really wouldn't look at SIRP!Asuka as a romantic prospect. She's not his type, and he's too used to seeing A&T!Asuka as Shinji's match. He wants a relationship, but not just any relationship. He wants someone who wants him for being him, not a stranger from another 'verse. And look at the 2nd crossover. I don't think Asuka's very 'past' it.
Nnnnnot really, no. I keep telling you guys, it's not masochism or enjoying Rei being angry with him that he likes: It's the way she's so alive when she is, and definitely looking at him in a way no one else does. The way Rei lights up when she's like that. Rei doesn't realize as yet how so much more animated she is when angry. Asuka can be as angry, and it wouldn't have even a fraction the same effect on Kaworu.
I'd recommend against that, strongly. It...does not feel right, especially after the conversation the Asukas had. SIRP!Asuka is closer to Rei and Shinji than Kaworu by a fair bit, despite it still being awkward.
A&T!Kaworu? Remember all the comments I made about you hurting Shinji by making him kill you after you got in a relationship with him?
YOU PULL A STUNT LIKE THAT, AND THEY RETURN TENFOLD!
Things will become clearer after the update, but Kaworu is making this suggestion out of care for Shinji and the others. He's decided he is too much of a danger to them. He's asking them to do this so he can't hurt them.
He doesn't like it, actually. He is increasingly tormented by having that kind of happiness dangled just out of reach. He really wants to hold her like that, and take a leap of faith and feeling... but knows there's a thousand reasons why that's an impossible, bad idea.
He's still in the same frame of mind as Rei: "If I tell people I care about, SEELE or NERV might kill them for knowing." So Mari already knowing immediately makes him worry for her safety. There's also the fear of rejection behind things.
That's not what Kaworu took from it. Mari just said they couldn't just have a casual relationship. That if they tried, because they're so close, it would be deep, real, and intense... and Mari doesn't want to risk a close friendship on the chance it might not work. Mari's not going to go for it because it would really be betting everything, emotionally. That's why A&T!Kaworu was so encouraged to hear it: That Mari had thought about it, and decided against it to preserve the friendship they have, not because Kaworu's half-Angel. But she had considered it, and that made him very happy.
Eeehhhh no. A&T!Kaworu really wouldn't look at SIRP!Asuka as a romantic prospect. She's not his type, and he's too used to seeing A&T!Asuka as Shinji's match. He wants a relationship, but not just any relationship. He wants someone who wants him for being him, not a stranger from another 'verse.
Nnnnnot really, no. I keep telling you guys, it's not masochism or enjoying Rei being angry with him that he likes: It's the way she's so alive when she is, and definitely looking at him in a way no one else does. The way Rei lights up when she's like that. Rei doesn't realize as yet how so much more animated she is when angry. Asuka can be as angry, and it wouldn't have even a fraction the same effect on Kaworu.
I'd argue differently, but you're the A&T Author, and have a better grasp on the SIRP character's mental states than I. I wouldn't have a chance, so I'll take your word for it.
Considering the proven psychologicalbenefitsof laughter, I'm not asking Kaworu to laugh. I'm saying he desperately needs to laugh. You're a soldier, is black/morbid humor not a common coping mechanism?
Things will become clearer after the update, but Kaworu is making this suggestion out of care for Shinji and the others. He's decided he is too much of a danger to them. He's asking them to do this so he can't hurt them.
In seriousness, the way Mari's and Kaworu's personalities and experiences contrasted was interesting to read. In fact, it is tempting me to start reading SIRP again; I started reading it a month or so ago, but other things pulled away my attention.
In seriousness, the way Mari's and Kaworu's personalities and experiences contrasted was interesting to read. In fact, it is tempting me to start reading SIRP again; I started reading it a month or so ago, but other things pulled away my attention.
That's not what Kaworu took from it. Mari just said they couldn't just have a casual relationship. That if they tried, because they're so close, it would be deep, real, and intense... and Mari doesn't want to risk a close friendship on the chance it might not work. Mari's not going to go for it because it would really be betting everything, emotionally. That's why A&T!Kaworu was so encouraged to hear it: That Mari had thought about it, and decided against it to preserve the friendship they have, not because Kaworu's half-Angel. But she had considered it, and that made him very happy.
It is both. On the one hand, Mari is implying that she and Kaworu are close enough that if they were to have a romance it would be something super serious. On the other hand, she has a lot of reservations about dating someone who has such a high chance of dying, especially by her own hand. That's considerably more of a concern for her than things ending in a breakup.
On the other hand, she has a lot of reservations about dating someone who has such a high chance of dying, especially by her own hand. That's considerably more of a concern for her than things ending in a breakup.
So. Mari essentially has the exactly same problem as A&T!Rei. Huh. Interesting. Man, poor Kaworu. Not only does 'the Call' bother him across universes, but it also ruins his love life.
So. Mari essentially has the exactly same problem as A&T!Rei. Huh. Interesting. Man, poor Kaworu. Not only does 'the Call' bother him across universes, but it also ruins his love life.
You have to admit it's a valid concern. Crushing your boyfriend with your Eva's hand while he rants about how he needs you to kill him but he doesn't want to die would make for a terrible three month anniversary.
You have to admit it's a valid concern. Crushing your boyfriend with your Eva's hand while he rants about how he needs you to kill him but he doesn't want to die would make for a terrible three month anniversary.
True enough. I've just never realyl seen Kaworu and Mari be in that... position in SIRP. Applying the same 'if just it weren't Adam' routine Rei has in A&T to Mari - would she then agree to try something 'super serious'?
True enough. I've just never realyl seen Kaworu and Mari be in that... position in SIRP. Applying the same 'if just it weren't Adam' routine Rei has in A&T to Mari - would she then agree to try something 'super serious'?
Tough to say. To some extent she dislikes the idea of tying herself into what might be a lifelong relationship before she even finishes high school. She's also concerned that committing herself to a relationship she may not be ready for will just lead to her wanderlust utterly ruining things down the line.
But then again she's not the kind of girl who lets fear stop her from going after what she wants.
It's Friday! And this one's for @Cuddles, @MarshalGraves, and @Jakobstj. Prepare for 2600 words of Gendo pissing people off, and Kaworu watching TV.
Art?
Chapter 10.2 Choices and Sacrifices
+++
"The Angel attacked her mind via its beam. It appears to have been some sort of specialized AT-Field, but the MAGI are still analyzing the data. It had physical effects: She was bleeding from her nose and eyes, her pupils had mismatched dilation, and her eyes were not tracking together. She reported extreme pain and disorientation when I opened the Entry Plug, so I sedated her, sir." Butter would not melt in Ritsuko's mouth.
Commander Ikari's glasses shone eerily in the sunset light filtering down from the surface. He stared at her from his usual hands-folded pose, seated at his desk. "I want you to alert me as soon as she regains consciousness. We need to determine if the Angel affected her mind. Begin preliminary actions to ready the next clone. In the event she is negatively distorted from it, we may have to replace the current one and restore from the latest full scan upload."
Ritsuko carefully concealed the shiver that ran through her at how casually Gendo ordered that. 'And she's his favorite. Right.' "Yes, sir. I'm continuing my examination, but a night of LCL -boosted treatment in the scan chamber should heal most of the physical trauma. The Angel's beam affected her mind and AT-Field more than her body."
"Explain. What did it do to her AT-Field?" he said.
"Her AT-Field is… I don't know how to describe it, sir. It's almost… thinned. She's weakened badly, but recovering. She shouldn't try synchronizing with her Eva for a while, until it stabilizes. In fact, she should avoid all strains, as much as possible. I recommend keeping her out of school for a week, and letting her rest as much as possible."
"Keep her in the Terminal Dogma lab, then," Gendo ordered.
Ritsuko shook her head. "Too much proximity to Lilith. She needs to be at some distance to let her own AT-Field stabilize. Bed rest in her apartment next to Major Katsuragi's should be sufficient. She'll be as far from Lilith's AT-Field as possible, and during the day she'll even be away from other people. The Section 2 teams will have overwatch, and Major Katsuragi can check on her in the evenings."
"Fine," Gendo grunted, "make it so. Four days rest, and we'll re-evaluate. Send a note to the school."
There was a moment of silence, and she waited for his dismissal.
"Unit-01 showed no effects?" he asked again.
'You spent half an hour interrogating me in detail about Unit-01's Core before you let me say word one about the First Child. Yes, your precious Yui is fine, Commander. God, how did I ever think I could get your mind off her for even one minute?' "Yes, sir. The Third Child's AT-Field held off any effects until the Angel was terminated by the Lance. Unit-01's Core shows no effect." She paused. "I have not yet had time to examine Unit-00 or Unit-03."
Gendo gave a nod so small it was barely noticeable. "See to them, then return to monitoring the First Child. Report any irregularities with Unit-03. I still want answers for how the Fourth Child was recovered from the Core."
'Of course you do. That's all that matters to you, isn't it? Even your whole Scenario is less about Human Instrumentality than just getting her back. Looks like I'll be working all night and sleeping in the lab again. God, I want to just curl up with Maya.'
"Yes, sir," was all she said out loud.
"You are dismissed. Send in Major Katsuragi."
"Yes, sir." She turned to go.
"And Doctor Akagi?"
She turned back. "Sir?"
"My apartment, 2200."
She managed to keep her face still. It was harder to pretend than it used to be. "Yes, sir." 'You just want to pretend I'm her again, don't you? Now I really want Maya.'
Outside the office, Misato was waiting her turn to be grilled. The Operations Director gave her old friend a tired ghost of a smile. "Hey. Bet you the next round of drinks you'll be in bed before me tonight?"
Ritsuko snorted sourly. "No bet. I'm going to be working all night. The Commander even wants me to give him a full debriefing at 2200. You can go in now, he's waiting."
"Gee, thanks."
+++
"....no major physical damage to Unit-00, Unit-03, or Unit-01. All four Evas will be fully mission-ready by end of day tomorrow."
Commander Ikari just gave a small "Mmn," of acknowledgement. When he didn't react further, Misato continued.
"Pilot Ayanami has been taken under care of Doctor Akagi, per your instructions. Pilot Nagisa has been taken to the Geofront Hospital and examined. He has bleeding from his nose, eyes, and ears, and reported severe pain. They've sedated him, at his request. Pilot Ikari is… currently confined, again per your instructions, and has not been examined."
"Pilot Ikari has again engaged in gross insubordination during combat. He was directed not to sortie and risk Unit-01. He did so anyhow, and damaged multiple launch shaft blast doors in the process," Commander Ikari replied. "I am tired of his childish behavior. This is unacceptable in an Evangelion Pilot. He can remain confined until I summon him tomorrow."
"And a medical check? Not until after that?" Misato prodded.
"You may escort a medic for a basic check."
"Sir, I believe he might respond better to discipline on this matter if I spoke to him."
The Commander's lenses glittered coldly at her. "The last time you spoke to him about insubordination, Major, he then went AWOL for three days until forcibly retrieved by Section 2."
Misato held down her frown. "We have had considerably more time together since then, sir. We understand each other a lot better." 'And the last time you chewed him out over insubordination, you fired him because you thought you could replace him with the Dummy Plugs. If he and Asuka hadn't ignored that and hijacked Unit-03, we'd all be dead.'
"You may speak to him as you wish, Major. I will still discuss the matter with him myself tomorrow."
"What do you intend, sir? He and Asuka remain our best Pilots. Punishment for disobeying instructions is in order, but I am worried about…" How could she phrase this? "Sidelining our top Pilots for too long when we don't know when the next Angel could hit us."
The Commander was silent for a moment. "The Third Child will be disciplined appropriately. The degree of punishment will depend on how well he understands the depth of his offense," he finally said, cold and low. "He was ordered not to risk another Eva until Unit-02 could retrieve appropriate weapons to counterattack with."
"If he hadn't reached Unit-00 when he did, Rei could have damaged or destroyed Unit-03 and Pilot Nagisa in her disorientation," Misato countered. "Rei and Pilot Nagisa were also in critical danger from the effects of the Angel's beam, too. His actions protected them both from further harm."
The Commander did not move. "Irrelevant. He could just as easily have been crippled like the others. Evangelions are critical assets to defend against the Angels. The decision to risk one in battle is not up to the Pilot. He is not permitted to risk vital elements of Earth's defense on personal feelings."
Years of military discipline let Misato keep her expression calm and focused. 'You were ready to risk it out of desire not to risk you wife. And we're alone, I'm armed, and you helped murder my father. I'm holding back the desire to shoot you. You want to talk about 'risking vital elements of Earth's defense on personal feelings', you heartless, evil bastard? I won't let you win. You or SEELE.' "Yes, sir. I'll impress that on him when I speak to him. Any special instructions for Pilot Nagisa's treatment? Will Doctor Akagi be examining him?"
"The hospital staff can handle the Fifth Child. He can be released to your hands when they are done with him. You are dismissed, Major."
Misato crisply saluted, turned on her heel, and headed for the door. 'You knew, you bastard. My father died because of you.'
+++
"Oi, Regenbogenforelle! Bist du halbwegs angezogen?" a familiar voice called through the closed door to his hospital room. [Oi, Rainbow Trout! You dressed to receive visitors?]
Kaworu muted the television. "Hallo, Fräulein Soryu. Ja bin ich. Bitte komm herein." [Hello, Miss Soryu. Yes, I am. Please come in.]
The door slid aside to admit the Second and Fourth Children. Kaworu smiled at his guests, though only Horaki-san returned it. The bloodied blotting cloths on the tray he'd pushed away and the remaining smears of blood on his face were not encouraging. "And hello to you too, Horaki-san. It is kind of you to visit me." He peered at the door, but no more guests were forthcoming. "Where are Shinji-kun and Ayanami-san?"
"Hmmph!" Asuka grumped. "Commander… Ikari had baka-Shinji arrested for 'insubordination' again, for launching without permission to go help you and Rei. And Rei is… we don't know. Doctor B… Akagi is 'examining' her, and won't even let us in to see her. We can't even tell if she's here in the hospital. When we couldn't find her, Hikari suggested we visit you and see if you were alright too."
"You...er… were screaming a lot when that Angel hit you, Nagisa-san. Rei, too. We… were worried about you both." Hikari said. She eyed the bloody cloths nervously. "Are you… hurt?"
Kaworu gave them a wan smile. "It was… painful, yes. I have been given a good amount of painkillers." He gestured at the IV line leading from his arm to the bag of fluid hanging from the stand next to the bed. "It helps, some."
Asuka's stare was sharp and intense. "What happened? Can you talk about it? What was it?"
Kaworu's face clouded. "I… it… invaded me. Smashed its way into my mind. It was extremely painful and… violating. It… ransacked my mind, going through every bad memory and pain I have. And once it ran out of memories, it started showing me all my fears. Nightmares." He shuddered and looked down at his hands.
Hikari looked pale. Asuka looked worse. "Jesus, Kaworu. Are… no, you can't be 'alright' from that. It attacked you with your own bad memories and fears? I…" Asuka shivered. "I don't even want to picture what that must have been like."
Kaworu nodded slightly. "I do not think it would have been… something you would take without great pain. In a way, I am glad it struck me, so it did not harm either of you or Shinji-kun."
"You're sounding like he would," Asuka said dryly. "And… thank you for trying to protect Rei. It was… hard to sit and listen to her scream. It didn't get any better when it hit you, either. I can understand why baka-Shinji couldn't just sit still while I got sent for that spear."
Kaworu looked at her more carefully. "A... spear? You killed the Angel with it?"
A more familiar, more cocky smile appeared on Asuka face. "Oh yeah. I threw it into orbit. One hit kill on that Angel."
Hikari put a finger to her chin. "Ne, Asuka, doesn't that tie you up with Ikari-kun?"
Asuka blinked. "I… huh. I hadn't even thought of it. Yeah, it does. It kind of slipped my mind, but yes, that puts us both at 4 solo and 3 joint kills." Her smile faded away. "Baka Shinji… and he's not even here for me to… rub it in."
"That spear sounds… quite amazing. But if you threw it that hard, is it… lost?" Kaworu asked. A drop of blood began to trickle down from his nose. "It sounds like a powerful weapon for any future Angel attacks."
Hikari pointed at his face. "Ah… Nagisa-san, you're… bleeding again."
He picked up one of the already bloodied cloths on the tray and blotted up the drip. "Thank you, Horaki-san. I… have felt better."
"I overheard some chatter about lunar orbit or something. Yeah, that spear is way out there, whatever it is. I don't think we're getting it back," Asuka said.
"Ah, that is… a shame. It sounds like something that could put a permanent stop to any Angel," Kaworu said. He looked down at his hands. The bloody cloth still in his left hand was shaking. "You have heard nothing from Ayanami-san at all? There is something I wanted to ask her to do for me."
Asuka shook her head. "Sorry, no. We looked. They've got her squirreled away somewhere deep for whatever medical treatment she's getting. I don't know why you're not getting the same. Anything we can do for you in her place?"
Kaworu smiled gently. "Oh, I'm sure Commander Ikari has reasons for ordering this. And thank you, but no. This is about a matter she and I have had discussions on, something she has promised she'd do for me. It's something between us." His smile faded away. "I just… really wanted to talk to her."
After a moment he forced it back. "It is heartening enough that you visit me. All I have had so far is old television shows to keep me occupied and not dwelling on the bad thoughts the Angel dredged up." He waved at the television on the far wall.
The two young women looked at it. "Some old show about… the American army?" Hikari asked.
"No, that's a hospital. See? He's getting into scrubs. Well, a military field hospital," Asuka pointed out.
"I just started watching it," Kaworu said. "The humor appeals to me, and I like the opening song. It feels more fitting to me right now than 'Ode To Joy'." He hummed a few bars.
Asuka smiled. "A bit different from your usual classical stuff, Rainbow Trout. No subtitles, I see. So, you speak English too, hm?" She turned to Hikari and grinned. "You need to catch up to the Pilot standard, Hikari. Once I get baka Shinji and Rei learning English too, you'll be the only Pilot who isn't tri-lingual."
Hikari snorted back at her. "School English isn't going to cut it, is it? And I bet you want me to learn German too, don't you?"
"Aber natürlich!" [But naturally!] Asuka smirked. "All the cool kids are doing it."
"So I am 'Rainbow Trout' to you too, now, Miss Soryu?" Kaworu asked, interrupting.
Asuka turned her smirk on him. "Well, you successfully made it through your first Eva deployment, so I can't quite call you 'new fish' anymore, but Rei suggested that as your nickname, and I like it. So the Rainbow Trout you are! All Pilots have a nickname around here. Baka Shinji, Wondergirl, Rainbow Trout…" Asuka listed.
Hikari cocked her head. "What about me?"
"Class Rep," Asuka continued without missing a beat. "And me, the Great Asuka Langley Soryu."
"Not exactly a nickname, that," Hikari observed.
"It is, however, in keeping with her usual modesty," Major Katsuragi said from the doorway, walking in. "Good to see you conscious, Kaworu-kun."
"Hello, Major. I confess, I wish I was not. My head still feels terrible." The Fifth Child touched his temple gingerly.
"I'll keep this to just a quick check on your well-being, then, and we can do the more thorough debrief when you've had some rest."
"Should we hang around for support, or do you want us to beat it, Misato?" Asuka inquired.
"You can stay if you like, this won't take too long. The docs said he needs rest and painkillers right now more than anything else," Misato said. "But I do need to talk to you for a few minutes after we're done, Asuka."
Kaworu: ...in fact, excluding the angels and a few of the brass, almost everybody involved is an innocent bystander.
Asuka: Well I'm not. I'm here because the world needs me!
Shinji: How do you know it wasn't just some excuse to ship you 9,000 kilometres from home?
Kaworu: Yeah! The angels were invented so your father wouldn't come looking for you!
Asuka: Oh, you're a pair of sickos!
Does Gendo even realize that in his obsessive desire to protect Yui he's basically burning almost every bridge he has?
Or does he just not give a shit anymore?
Anyway, I honestly think Gendo's new book should be titled How to Make Enemies & Alienate People because that's all he seems to be good at doing lately.
Does Gendo even realize that in his obsessive desire to protect Yui he's basically burning almost every bridge he has?
Or does he just not give a shit anymore?
Anyway, I honestly think Gendo's new book should be titled How to Make Enemies & Alienate People because that's all he seems to be good at doing lately.
Bridges and alliances for what? Reuniting with Yui (which kinda necessitates protecting her) is the only goal he has. So if those other people don't facilitate that, why should he care?
Though it is a bit odd that his entire early scenario rested on Yui killing all the angels for him. I mean, he does seem to be okay with a certain degree of risk for EVA-01.
Does Gendo even realize that in his obsessive desire to protect Yui he's basically burning almost every bridge he has?
Or does he just not give a shit anymore?
How often do obsessives realize what they're doing is self-destructive? Gendo knows he's close. He knows there's only 2 Angels left, and he knows where one of them is.
Does Gendo even realize that in his obsessive desire to protect Yui he's basically burning almost every bridge he has?
Or does he just not give a shit anymore?
Anyway, I honestly think Gendo's new book should be titled How to Make Enemies & Alienate People because that's all he seems to be good at doing lately.
Worse, he's even losing sight of his own goals, here.
Shinji taking Unit-01 out unquestionably saved Unit-03. You know, the Unit Ritsuko still needs to study to see if they repeat Shinji and Asuka's feat of getting Hikari out of the core?
He's near the end of his Scenario. At this point, all he wants to do is finish the race in first fucking place, but he doesn't even realize he's crippling his tires left and right, and I love seeing this self-destruction all happen without him even realizing it. He has options. He actually has options. And he knows it. But he can't even conceive of a plan that doesn't have him being a supreme bastard.
Excellent work, Strype. I don't know if you intended to pull Gendo off like this, but it's coming across as very, very much 'the house of cards is falling down, and he's so busy trying to put the top together he doesn't realize the bottom's folded in'.
rofl: THAT'S OUR MARI!
