Epsilon Rose
The King of Unrest
Heaven's Feel?
Advice and Trust [NGE]
Ranma-sensei
Sorcerer
- Location
- Citrix Receiver
- Pronouns
- Weatherdependent
That's the translation for an alternate name, not part of it, as far as I can tell.
Voikirium
SV's Estalia Guy
- Location
- Ruritania Illinois
- Pronouns
- He/Him
I dunno 'bout you guys, but I'm pretty sure there's a lot of the Lady du Lac in this here thread.
So what now, you want us to worship her instead?
No.
I'd rather drown myself in pleasures, whatever the cost. All hail the Lord of Excess!
- Location
- National Capital Region, USA
Nurgel is a great shampoo. And in this thread we take a dim view of heresy. The Emperor Protects! Up the Guard! 
Update in a few hours. @LilithPrime, my main beta, is busy.
Update in a few hours. @LilithPrime, my main beta, is busy.
You had me google "Nurgel".
The first result is incredibly funny.
Epsilon Rose
The King of Unrest
Not quite. Daisan Mahou translates to the Third Magic, but that's complete on it's own. Heaven's Feel is an alternative name, but I can't think of anything else they'd be referencing.
Comedy Omake #25 - Shinji's Been Sleeping Around...
- Location
- National Capital Region, USA
So, the writing bug bit, the muses were kind, and the creek didn't rise. Time for an update!
@JohnnyAdroit, @Scottsman, @akrasiel23, @Zaxxon, @Heimdall1342, @Epsilon Rose, @MondoMage, @Nyrath, @Farialyton, this is for you guys.
Chapter 8.26 lololol not really. April Fools!
Advent
+++
With some difficulty, she punched in the short designator for the pre-saved number. It rang several times. This was not surprising; it was very late. Or very early, really.
Click. "...Yes?"
Ritsuko swallowed. ".....I ....need your help."
There was a long pause. ".....now?"
"Yes."
Another long pause. "...Your apartment?"
Ritsuko almost sobbed in relief. "Yes," she gasped.
The call disconnected. She sagged back onto the bed, the phone falling out of her hand to lay beside her. The apartment was still dark, cold, and still... but now she didn't feel quite so alone.
+++
Her eyes snapped open, a weak, mumbled cry of alarm halfway out of her mouth before she was fully awake. She sat up, rubbing at her eyes, trying to slow down her hammering heartbeat and heaving breaths.
"Gott damn it... Misato, this is your fucking fault." She hadn't had a nightmare in weeks. Months. Not once since Shinji had started sleeping beside her. But now they were back, and she knew why: It had been almost a week now since Misato had asked/told them to sleep separately until she decided how she was going to react to learning they were together. It had been bad enough the first night, with her sleep restless and unsettled, and it had only gotten worse each passing day. Now she was waking up from a nightmare that she couldn't quite remember...
She clutched at her chest. No... she only wished she couldn't remember. Enough stuck with her, more than enough to send another wave of shivering down her body. She shot a look at the clock by her bed. 4:23 am.
Asuka bit her lip for a second, but then got out of bed, muttering, "...that's it. I can't stand this anymore. Sorry, Misato, but I need him."
She grabbed tomorrow's clothes out of her dresser and tiptoed to the door, sliding it open silently. A cautious glance down the hall showed no signs of any activity from Misato's room. She ghosted across the hall, even holding her breath for extra silence. She slipped the door to Shinji's room open and closed in under two seconds. She tucked her bundle of clothes into the corner by the door. Rising from where she'd bent over, she almost jumped in alarm when she turned around to find Shinji already sitting up and staring at her, confusion melting into a warm smile that sparked a matching one on her face. "Hey..."
Her answering smile froze in panic as the large lump in bed next to Shinji stirred and sleepily said "Mmmm, it is morning already, Shin-chan? I don't want to get up. You kept me up half the night!"
Asuka looked from Shinji to the lump and back, panic giving way to confusion and betrayal. "Shinji, what the fuck is-"
The lump sat up, the white sheets falling away to reveal purple hair and a truly impressive bust for a Japanese woman. "Oh, hey, Asuka," Misato said, rubbing at her eyes. "Did you want something?"
"Yes, but apparently you got it first! What the Hell, Misato?!" the redhead screeched. "He's literally half your age, and, not to put too fine a point on it, my boyfriend! You've got Kaji! I never even got a piece of him!"
"Well, you kept bragging about how good Shinji is, and I got kind of curious, so when I came by his room tonight to talk about letting you two get back to sleeping together I demanded he prove it as part of the deal. And woooo did he! I may have to ask if I can have two days a week, Asuka. I mean, dayum. I thought my toenails were going to curl, no joke. We're going to have to start calling Shinji 'Mister Third Impact', since he hits that like the fist of an angry god!"
"That. Is. IT!" Asuka shouted. She walked over to the bed and yanked Misato out of it by her hair. "You and me, Boobasaurus! Strip Chess match in the living room, right now! Winner gets both boytoys for a week! Loser pays for dinner!"
"But I'm only wearing a blanket, and you're just in a shirt and panties!"
"Then you better play really well, bitch!" Asuka dragged her out of the room by her hair.
Shinji let out a relieved sigh. "Well, at least she didn't kill m-"
Asuka stuck her head back in the door. "And you, Third Child! Don't think I've forgotten about you! You have any idea how much trouble you are in right now?"
"Errrrr….."
"For not inviting me?"
"……wut."
"Look, I am the alpha bitch around here! I'm the one in charge of this harem. You get to play with what I say you can play with. And you did not ask permission for this, did you?"
"………um, no, Mistress."
"You will be disciplined later. In the meantime, you're on snacks and drinks duty for this match. Now hop to it. I want a nacho platter and a beer in the next five minutes, or I'm going to chain you to the front of Misato's car for the drive to school tomorrow! Furiosa's got nothing on me!" She vanished back out into the hallway.
Shinji waited a few seconds, then sighed in relief again.
"……are they gone?" whispered a quiet voice from the closet.
Shinji opened the door, releasing the occupant. "Yeah, but you better make your escape now. Misato almost saw you!"
Kozo Fuyutsuki nodded worriedly, hitching up the waistband of his leather trousers. "We can't let anyone know about us, dear. Your father would be furious! And then he'd punish me for cheating on him!"
Shinji patted his cheek. "I know, my pet. He'd hate to hear you traded up for the newer, better model Ikari. Now fly! Fly like winged monkeys!"
+++
What, you think I forgot what day it was?
How about some more versions?
++++
She grabbed tomorrow's clothes out of her dresser and tiptoed to the door, sliding it open silently. A cautious glance down the hall showed no signs of any activity from Misato's room. She ghosted across the hall, even holding her breath for extra silence. She slipped the door to Shinji's room open and closed in under two seconds. She tucked her bundle of clothes into the corner by the door. Rising from where she'd bent over, she almost jumped in alarm when she turned around to find Shinji already sitting up and staring at her, confusion melting into a warm smile that sparked a matching one on her face. "Hey..."
Her answering smile froze in panic as the large lump in bed next to Shinji stirred and sleepily said "Mmmm, it is morning already, Shinji? I passed out after round 4."
Asuka looked in shock as the slender form of Rei Ayanami sat up next to her boyfriend. "What?! What?! WHAT THE HELL, SHINJI?!"
Shinji shrugged sheepishly. "Well, I was trying to think of what to get you for your birthday, and I've seen how you've been looking at Rei for the last couple weeks and making comments about 'Israfel Specials', so I thought 'Hey, why not get her a Rei?', but then I thought, 'Hmm, we better practice first like we did with the real Israfel, since synchronization in a dual attack is important, so… I invited Rei over to practice."
Asuka looked stunned, her eyes sweeping back and forth from Shinji to Rei and back. "You snuck our best friend into your bed and had wild nookie with her at least 4 times tonight so you could 'practice' for setting up a birthday threesome with me?"
"Uh….yes, yes I did."
"I… I…"
"Yes?"
"You are the best boyfriend ever. Welp, the surprise is blown, so might as well enjoy it! Make room, Asuka Langley Soryu coming in for a landing!" She dove for the bed. Rei squeaked nicely when Asuka landed on her.
++++
I know a bunch of you want me to make that one canon, too.
How about another one?
++++
She grabbed tomorrow's clothes out of her dresser and tiptoed to the door, sliding it open silently. A cautious glance down the hall showed no signs of any activity from Misato's room. She ghosted across the hall, even holding her breath for extra silence. She slipped the door to Shinji's room open and closed in under two seconds. She tucked her bundle of clothes into the corner by the door. Rising from where she'd bent over, she almost jumped in alarm when she turned around to find Shinji already sitting up and staring at her, confusion melting into a warm smile that sparked a matching one on her face. "Hey..."
Her answering smile froze in panic as the large lump in bed next to Shinji stirred and sleepily said "Mmmm, it is morning, Shin-chan? I don't want to get up already. You kept me up half the night!"
Asuka stared in utter confusion as she sat up in the bed next to Shinji. Asuka stared at Asuka. Eventually, she turned her disbelieving eyes to Shinji. "Ok, what the fuck? Did I suddenly grow a twin sister? I am not Gogo Ayo Gigamoto Bomango!"
"Humph! I am not your identical twin sister, Soryu," the strawberry blonde in the bed declared. "I'm the newer and improved model! Shikinami superior, Soryu inferior!"
Asuka (Soryu-type) started to glow red. "Oh, that does it, you cheap copy! When I'm done with you, you're going to need more than a 'Rebuild'!" She pulled back a glowing fist and launched herself at the girl on the bed.
She never made it, as Asuka (Shikinami-type) flew out of bed right back at her, meeting her fist-to-fist in midair.
A vicious martial arts battle began in the air in the middle of the room. It did not stay there long, as the battle aura boosted punches quickly blew out the wall and took the fight into the air over the apartment building.
Shinji looked out the hole. Things had escalated: Asuka (Shikinami-type) now sported a spiky mass of glowing gold hair that stuck straight up, while Asuka (Soryu-type) was now shooting beams of psychic force from her forehead. Shinji shook his head and sighed. "I should have known something was wrong when she started talking about 'Beast Mode'."
"Are they gone?" a voice whispered from under the bed.
Shinji nodded. "Yeah, you should make a break for it now, Mari. I think they're both distracted."
Mari Illustrious Makinami gave him a peck on the cheek as she bounced over to the hole in the wall and leapt out, immediately pulling the ripcord on her parachute. "Yeehaa! See you next Thursday, Puppy-kun!"
Shinji waved. "As usual, Mari. G'night."
+++
What, you think we're done? Not even!
+++
She grabbed tomorrow's clothes out of her dresser and tiptoed to the door, sliding it open silently. A cautious glance down the hall showed no signs of any activity from Misato's room. She ghosted across the hall, even holding her breath for extra silence. She slipped the door to Shinji's room open and closed in under two seconds. She tucked her bundle of clothes into the corner by the door. Rising from where she'd bent over, she almost jumped in alarm when she turned around to find Shinji already sitting up and staring at her, confusion melting into a warm smile that sparked a matching one on her face. "Hey..."
Her answering smile froze in panic as the large lump in bed next to Shinji stirred and sleepily said "Mmmm, it is morning, Ikari-kun? I don't want to get up already. You kept me up half the night!"
Asuka stared in shock at the grey-haired prettyboy sitting up in bed next to Shinji. "I… what the Hell, Shinji? The transfer student? He hasn't even arrived yet!"
Shinji blushed and hid his face in Kaworu's chest. "Well, we ran into each other on the way back from the shops before dinner, and he said he wanted to show me a 'whole new world'. Then he started singing Disney songs. You know how show tunes are my weakness…"
Asuka nodded. It was true. A few lines from 'My Fair Lady', and Shinji was putty in her hands. So the new kid had stumbled upon the same knowledge? So be it. "Alright, I'm still mad at you for not letting me know. You two get ready for round two, I'm going to get some popcorn and a nice chair, since yaoi is hot."
Kaworu spoke up. "Do I get a vote in this, Miss Soryu?"
"Quiet, Sparkles. You owe me for one ride on the Shinji Express. Now get to the boy-love, or I'll call in Rei with her flamethrower. She's been reading 'Shinji & Warhammer 40k', you know."
"I'll be good!"
+++
But wait, there's one more!
+++
She grabbed tomorrow's clothes out of her dresser and tiptoed to the door, sliding it open silently. A cautious glance down the hall showed no signs of any activity from Misato's room. She ghosted across the hall, even holding her breath for extra silence. She slipped the door to Shinji's room open and closed in under two seconds. She tucked her bundle of clothes into the corner by the door. Rising from where she'd bent over, she almost jumped in alarm when she turned around to find Shinji already sitting up and staring at her, confusion melting into a warm smile that sparked a matching one on her face. "Hey..."
Her answering smile froze in panic as the small lump in bed next to Shinji stirred and sleepily said "Wark!"
Asuka just blinked. "Wut."
"Oh Hiiiiiiiii~, Asuka!" Shinji said, wobbling back and forth. "I thought you'd melted into zebras."
"Ok, what the Hell, Shinji? I could understand you cheating with me with Misato, or Rei, or some other girl. Or maybe even a boy. But a penguin?!"
Shinji giggled and stared at her. Well, in her general vicinity. Vaguely. His eyes were tracking independently in different directions. "Pen Pen was so sweet. He just came into my room singing Spanish love ballads and swept me off my feet. They're right, you know. 'Once you go penguin, you stardust pencil treetop brick. Purple monkey dishwasher." He nodded sagely and fell over.
"Wark."
Asuka glared at the penguin. "I can tell he's higher than a kite, thanks. And you are such a bitch for taking advantage of him like this."
"Wark wark."
"What do you mean, 'it's not my fault'?! If you didn't drug him, who did?"
"Father came by with the drug supply he promised us back in his office. And it's the good shit! I can see through tiiiii~me!" Shinji warbled from the bed. He appeared to be making a vigorous effort to grab the invisible fairies floating around his face.
Asuka glared at him. "Gott damn it, Third, you should know better. Don't trust your father, he's a lunatic."
"That's why I only take the homemade LSD I mix in the sink!" Misato declared from a hole in the ceiling. "Wheee! I'm in the crawlspace again! Ceiling Misato is watching you masturbate! Hee hee hee!" There was a series of thuds and then Misato began to meow loudly.
"I am not talking you two down again. I'm going to Rei's place to get some peace and quiet. And maybe some yuri." Asuka spun on her heel and stomped off down the hall.
"Wait for meeeeeeee, Asuka! I must follow the butterflies! Hippo hippo hippo giraffe BEEEEEEES!" Shinji shouted cheerily, springing up to run after her.
"….are they gone?" a voice whispered from under the bed.
Pen Pen nodded. "Wark."
Hikari Horaki and Ritsuko Akagi carefully squeezed themselves out from the cramped and overcrowded hiding place. "Whew! I thought we were caught for sure!" the brunette declared. "Oh well, this is still less crowded than your place, Pen Pen."
"Same time next week, honey?" Ritsuko asked.
"Wark!"
+++
Ok, now back to work. Update tonight!
@JohnnyAdroit, @Scottsman, @akrasiel23, @Zaxxon, @Heimdall1342, @Epsilon Rose, @MondoMage, @Nyrath, @Farialyton, this is for you guys.
Chapter 8.26 lololol not really. April Fools!
Advent
+++
With some difficulty, she punched in the short designator for the pre-saved number. It rang several times. This was not surprising; it was very late. Or very early, really.
Click. "...Yes?"
Ritsuko swallowed. ".....I ....need your help."
There was a long pause. ".....now?"
"Yes."
Another long pause. "...Your apartment?"
Ritsuko almost sobbed in relief. "Yes," she gasped.
The call disconnected. She sagged back onto the bed, the phone falling out of her hand to lay beside her. The apartment was still dark, cold, and still... but now she didn't feel quite so alone.
+++
Her eyes snapped open, a weak, mumbled cry of alarm halfway out of her mouth before she was fully awake. She sat up, rubbing at her eyes, trying to slow down her hammering heartbeat and heaving breaths.
"Gott damn it... Misato, this is your fucking fault." She hadn't had a nightmare in weeks. Months. Not once since Shinji had started sleeping beside her. But now they were back, and she knew why: It had been almost a week now since Misato had asked/told them to sleep separately until she decided how she was going to react to learning they were together. It had been bad enough the first night, with her sleep restless and unsettled, and it had only gotten worse each passing day. Now she was waking up from a nightmare that she couldn't quite remember...
She clutched at her chest. No... she only wished she couldn't remember. Enough stuck with her, more than enough to send another wave of shivering down her body. She shot a look at the clock by her bed. 4:23 am.
Asuka bit her lip for a second, but then got out of bed, muttering, "...that's it. I can't stand this anymore. Sorry, Misato, but I need him."
She grabbed tomorrow's clothes out of her dresser and tiptoed to the door, sliding it open silently. A cautious glance down the hall showed no signs of any activity from Misato's room. She ghosted across the hall, even holding her breath for extra silence. She slipped the door to Shinji's room open and closed in under two seconds. She tucked her bundle of clothes into the corner by the door. Rising from where she'd bent over, she almost jumped in alarm when she turned around to find Shinji already sitting up and staring at her, confusion melting into a warm smile that sparked a matching one on her face. "Hey..."
Her answering smile froze in panic as the large lump in bed next to Shinji stirred and sleepily said "Mmmm, it is morning already, Shin-chan? I don't want to get up. You kept me up half the night!"
Asuka looked from Shinji to the lump and back, panic giving way to confusion and betrayal. "Shinji, what the fuck is-"
The lump sat up, the white sheets falling away to reveal purple hair and a truly impressive bust for a Japanese woman. "Oh, hey, Asuka," Misato said, rubbing at her eyes. "Did you want something?"
"Yes, but apparently you got it first! What the Hell, Misato?!" the redhead screeched. "He's literally half your age, and, not to put too fine a point on it, my boyfriend! You've got Kaji! I never even got a piece of him!"
"Well, you kept bragging about how good Shinji is, and I got kind of curious, so when I came by his room tonight to talk about letting you two get back to sleeping together I demanded he prove it as part of the deal. And woooo did he! I may have to ask if I can have two days a week, Asuka. I mean, dayum. I thought my toenails were going to curl, no joke. We're going to have to start calling Shinji 'Mister Third Impact', since he hits that like the fist of an angry god!"
"That. Is. IT!" Asuka shouted. She walked over to the bed and yanked Misato out of it by her hair. "You and me, Boobasaurus! Strip Chess match in the living room, right now! Winner gets both boytoys for a week! Loser pays for dinner!"
"But I'm only wearing a blanket, and you're just in a shirt and panties!"
"Then you better play really well, bitch!" Asuka dragged her out of the room by her hair.
Shinji let out a relieved sigh. "Well, at least she didn't kill m-"
Asuka stuck her head back in the door. "And you, Third Child! Don't think I've forgotten about you! You have any idea how much trouble you are in right now?"
"Errrrr….."
"For not inviting me?"
"……wut."
"Look, I am the alpha bitch around here! I'm the one in charge of this harem. You get to play with what I say you can play with. And you did not ask permission for this, did you?"
"………um, no, Mistress."
"You will be disciplined later. In the meantime, you're on snacks and drinks duty for this match. Now hop to it. I want a nacho platter and a beer in the next five minutes, or I'm going to chain you to the front of Misato's car for the drive to school tomorrow! Furiosa's got nothing on me!" She vanished back out into the hallway.
Shinji waited a few seconds, then sighed in relief again.
"……are they gone?" whispered a quiet voice from the closet.
Shinji opened the door, releasing the occupant. "Yeah, but you better make your escape now. Misato almost saw you!"
Kozo Fuyutsuki nodded worriedly, hitching up the waistband of his leather trousers. "We can't let anyone know about us, dear. Your father would be furious! And then he'd punish me for cheating on him!"
Shinji patted his cheek. "I know, my pet. He'd hate to hear you traded up for the newer, better model Ikari. Now fly! Fly like winged monkeys!"
+++
What, you think I forgot what day it was?
How about some more versions?
++++
She grabbed tomorrow's clothes out of her dresser and tiptoed to the door, sliding it open silently. A cautious glance down the hall showed no signs of any activity from Misato's room. She ghosted across the hall, even holding her breath for extra silence. She slipped the door to Shinji's room open and closed in under two seconds. She tucked her bundle of clothes into the corner by the door. Rising from where she'd bent over, she almost jumped in alarm when she turned around to find Shinji already sitting up and staring at her, confusion melting into a warm smile that sparked a matching one on her face. "Hey..."
Her answering smile froze in panic as the large lump in bed next to Shinji stirred and sleepily said "Mmmm, it is morning already, Shinji? I passed out after round 4."
Asuka looked in shock as the slender form of Rei Ayanami sat up next to her boyfriend. "What?! What?! WHAT THE HELL, SHINJI?!"
Shinji shrugged sheepishly. "Well, I was trying to think of what to get you for your birthday, and I've seen how you've been looking at Rei for the last couple weeks and making comments about 'Israfel Specials', so I thought 'Hey, why not get her a Rei?', but then I thought, 'Hmm, we better practice first like we did with the real Israfel, since synchronization in a dual attack is important, so… I invited Rei over to practice."
Asuka looked stunned, her eyes sweeping back and forth from Shinji to Rei and back. "You snuck our best friend into your bed and had wild nookie with her at least 4 times tonight so you could 'practice' for setting up a birthday threesome with me?"
"Uh….yes, yes I did."
"I… I…"
"Yes?"
"You are the best boyfriend ever. Welp, the surprise is blown, so might as well enjoy it! Make room, Asuka Langley Soryu coming in for a landing!" She dove for the bed. Rei squeaked nicely when Asuka landed on her.
++++
I know a bunch of you want me to make that one canon, too.
How about another one?
++++
She grabbed tomorrow's clothes out of her dresser and tiptoed to the door, sliding it open silently. A cautious glance down the hall showed no signs of any activity from Misato's room. She ghosted across the hall, even holding her breath for extra silence. She slipped the door to Shinji's room open and closed in under two seconds. She tucked her bundle of clothes into the corner by the door. Rising from where she'd bent over, she almost jumped in alarm when she turned around to find Shinji already sitting up and staring at her, confusion melting into a warm smile that sparked a matching one on her face. "Hey..."
Her answering smile froze in panic as the large lump in bed next to Shinji stirred and sleepily said "Mmmm, it is morning, Shin-chan? I don't want to get up already. You kept me up half the night!"
Asuka stared in utter confusion as she sat up in the bed next to Shinji. Asuka stared at Asuka. Eventually, she turned her disbelieving eyes to Shinji. "Ok, what the fuck? Did I suddenly grow a twin sister? I am not Gogo Ayo Gigamoto Bomango!"
"Humph! I am not your identical twin sister, Soryu," the strawberry blonde in the bed declared. "I'm the newer and improved model! Shikinami superior, Soryu inferior!"
Asuka (Soryu-type) started to glow red. "Oh, that does it, you cheap copy! When I'm done with you, you're going to need more than a 'Rebuild'!" She pulled back a glowing fist and launched herself at the girl on the bed.
She never made it, as Asuka (Shikinami-type) flew out of bed right back at her, meeting her fist-to-fist in midair.
A vicious martial arts battle began in the air in the middle of the room. It did not stay there long, as the battle aura boosted punches quickly blew out the wall and took the fight into the air over the apartment building.
Shinji looked out the hole. Things had escalated: Asuka (Shikinami-type) now sported a spiky mass of glowing gold hair that stuck straight up, while Asuka (Soryu-type) was now shooting beams of psychic force from her forehead. Shinji shook his head and sighed. "I should have known something was wrong when she started talking about 'Beast Mode'."
"Are they gone?" a voice whispered from under the bed.
Shinji nodded. "Yeah, you should make a break for it now, Mari. I think they're both distracted."
Mari Illustrious Makinami gave him a peck on the cheek as she bounced over to the hole in the wall and leapt out, immediately pulling the ripcord on her parachute. "Yeehaa! See you next Thursday, Puppy-kun!"
Shinji waved. "As usual, Mari. G'night."
+++
What, you think we're done? Not even!
+++
She grabbed tomorrow's clothes out of her dresser and tiptoed to the door, sliding it open silently. A cautious glance down the hall showed no signs of any activity from Misato's room. She ghosted across the hall, even holding her breath for extra silence. She slipped the door to Shinji's room open and closed in under two seconds. She tucked her bundle of clothes into the corner by the door. Rising from where she'd bent over, she almost jumped in alarm when she turned around to find Shinji already sitting up and staring at her, confusion melting into a warm smile that sparked a matching one on her face. "Hey..."
Her answering smile froze in panic as the large lump in bed next to Shinji stirred and sleepily said "Mmmm, it is morning, Ikari-kun? I don't want to get up already. You kept me up half the night!"
Asuka stared in shock at the grey-haired prettyboy sitting up in bed next to Shinji. "I… what the Hell, Shinji? The transfer student? He hasn't even arrived yet!"
Shinji blushed and hid his face in Kaworu's chest. "Well, we ran into each other on the way back from the shops before dinner, and he said he wanted to show me a 'whole new world'. Then he started singing Disney songs. You know how show tunes are my weakness…"
Asuka nodded. It was true. A few lines from 'My Fair Lady', and Shinji was putty in her hands. So the new kid had stumbled upon the same knowledge? So be it. "Alright, I'm still mad at you for not letting me know. You two get ready for round two, I'm going to get some popcorn and a nice chair, since yaoi is hot."
Kaworu spoke up. "Do I get a vote in this, Miss Soryu?"
"Quiet, Sparkles. You owe me for one ride on the Shinji Express. Now get to the boy-love, or I'll call in Rei with her flamethrower. She's been reading 'Shinji & Warhammer 40k', you know."
"I'll be good!"
+++
But wait, there's one more!
+++
She grabbed tomorrow's clothes out of her dresser and tiptoed to the door, sliding it open silently. A cautious glance down the hall showed no signs of any activity from Misato's room. She ghosted across the hall, even holding her breath for extra silence. She slipped the door to Shinji's room open and closed in under two seconds. She tucked her bundle of clothes into the corner by the door. Rising from where she'd bent over, she almost jumped in alarm when she turned around to find Shinji already sitting up and staring at her, confusion melting into a warm smile that sparked a matching one on her face. "Hey..."
Her answering smile froze in panic as the small lump in bed next to Shinji stirred and sleepily said "Wark!"
Asuka just blinked. "Wut."
"Oh Hiiiiiiiii~, Asuka!" Shinji said, wobbling back and forth. "I thought you'd melted into zebras."
"Ok, what the Hell, Shinji? I could understand you cheating with me with Misato, or Rei, or some other girl. Or maybe even a boy. But a penguin?!"
Shinji giggled and stared at her. Well, in her general vicinity. Vaguely. His eyes were tracking independently in different directions. "Pen Pen was so sweet. He just came into my room singing Spanish love ballads and swept me off my feet. They're right, you know. 'Once you go penguin, you stardust pencil treetop brick. Purple monkey dishwasher." He nodded sagely and fell over.
"Wark."
Asuka glared at the penguin. "I can tell he's higher than a kite, thanks. And you are such a bitch for taking advantage of him like this."
"Wark wark."
"What do you mean, 'it's not my fault'?! If you didn't drug him, who did?"
"Father came by with the drug supply he promised us back in his office. And it's the good shit! I can see through tiiiii~me!" Shinji warbled from the bed. He appeared to be making a vigorous effort to grab the invisible fairies floating around his face.
Asuka glared at him. "Gott damn it, Third, you should know better. Don't trust your father, he's a lunatic."
"That's why I only take the homemade LSD I mix in the sink!" Misato declared from a hole in the ceiling. "Wheee! I'm in the crawlspace again! Ceiling Misato is watching you masturbate! Hee hee hee!" There was a series of thuds and then Misato began to meow loudly.
"I am not talking you two down again. I'm going to Rei's place to get some peace and quiet. And maybe some yuri." Asuka spun on her heel and stomped off down the hall.
"Wait for meeeeeeee, Asuka! I must follow the butterflies! Hippo hippo hippo giraffe BEEEEEEES!" Shinji shouted cheerily, springing up to run after her.
"….are they gone?" a voice whispered from under the bed.
Pen Pen nodded. "Wark."
Hikari Horaki and Ritsuko Akagi carefully squeezed themselves out from the cramped and overcrowded hiding place. "Whew! I thought we were caught for sure!" the brunette declared. "Oh well, this is still less crowded than your place, Pen Pen."
"Same time next week, honey?" Ritsuko asked.
"Wark!"
+++
Ok, now back to work. Update tonight!
Ranma-sensei
Sorcerer
- Location
- Citrix Receiver
- Pronouns
- Weatherdependent
That's what I just said spelled differently.
Knightfall
Nui lover and Slaaneshi
- Location
- New York, New York
What Shinji thinks he is.So, the writing bug bit, the muses were kind, and the creek didn't rise. Time for an update!
@JohnnyAdroit, @Scottsman, @akrasiel23, @Zaxxon, @Heimdall1342, @Epsilon Rose, @MondoMage, @Nyrath, @Farialyton, this is for you guys.
Chapter 8.26 lololol not really. April Fools!
Advent
+++
With some difficulty, she punched in the short designator for the pre-saved number. It rang several times. This was not surprising; it was very late. Or very early, really.
Click. "...Yes?"
Ritsuko swallowed. ".....I ....need your help."
There was a long pause. ".....now?"
"Yes."
Another long pause. "...Your apartment?"
Ritsuko almost sobbed in relief. "Yes," she gasped.
The call disconnected. She sagged back onto the bed, the phone falling out of her hand to lay beside her. The apartment was still dark, cold, and still... but now she didn't feel quite so alone.
+++
Her eyes snapped open, a weak, mumbled cry of alarm halfway out of her mouth before she was fully awake. She sat up, rubbing at her eyes, trying to slow down her hammering heartbeat and heaving breaths.
"Gott damn it... Misato, this is your fucking fault." She hadn't had a nightmare in weeks. Months. Not once since Shinji had started sleeping beside her. But now they were back, and she knew why: It had been almost a week now since Misato had asked/told them to sleep separately until she decided how she was going to react to learning they were together. It had been bad enough the first night, with her sleep restless and unsettled, and it had only gotten worse each passing day. Now she was waking up from a nightmare that she couldn't quite remember...
She clutched at her chest. No... she only wished she couldn't remember. Enough stuck with her, more than enough to send another wave of shivering down her body. She shot a look at the clock by her bed. 4:23 am.
Asuka bit her lip for a second, but then got out of bed, muttering, "...that's it. I can't stand this anymore. Sorry, Misato, but I need him."
She grabbed tomorrow's clothes out of her dresser and tiptoed to the door, sliding it open silently. A cautious glance down the hall showed no signs of any activity from Misato's room. She ghosted across the hall, even holding her breath for extra silence. She slipped the door to Shinji's room open and closed in under two seconds. She tucked her bundle of clothes into the corner by the door. Rising from where she'd bent over, she almost jumped in alarm when she turned around to find Shinji already sitting up and staring at her, confusion melting into a warm smile that sparked a matching one on her face. "Hey..."
Her answering smile froze in panic as the large lump in bed next to Shinji stirred and sleepily said "Mmmm, it is morning already, Shin-chan? I don't want to get up. You kept me up half the night!"
Asuka looked from Shinji to the lump and back, panic giving way to confusion and betrayal. "Shinji, what the fuck is-"
The lump sat up, the white sheets falling away to reveal purple hair and a truly impressive bust for a Japanese woman. "Oh, hey, Asuka," Misato said, rubbing at her eyes. "Did you want something?"
"Yes, but apparently you got it first! What the Hell, Misato?!" the redhead screeched. "He literally half your age, and, not to put too fine a point on it, my boyfriend! You've got Kaji! I never even got a piece of him!"
"Well, you kept bragging about how good Shinji is, and I got kind of curious, so when I came by his room tonight to talk about letting you two get back to sleeping together I demanded he prove it as part of the deal. And woooo did he! I may have to ask if I can have two days a week, Asuka. I mean, dayum. I thought my toenails were going to curl, no joke. We're going to have to start calling Shinji 'Mister Third Impact', since he hits that like the fist of an angry god!"
"That. Is. IT!" Asuka shouted. She walked over to the bed and yanked Misato out of it by her hair. "You and me, Boobasaurus! Strip Chess match in the living room, right now! Winner gets both boytoys for a week! Loser pays for dinner!"
"But I'm only wearing a blanket, and you're just in a shirt and panties!"
"Then you better play really well, bitch!" Asuka dragged her out of the room by her hair.
Shinji let out a relieved sigh. "Well, at least she didn't kill m-"
Asuka stuck her head back in the door. "And you, Third Child! Don't think I've forgotten about you! You have any idea how much trouble you are in right now?"
"Errrrr….."
"For not inviting me?"
"……wut."
"Look, I am the alpha bitch around here! I'm the one in charge of this harem. You get to play with what I say you can play with. And you did not ask permission for this, did you?"
"………um, no, Mistress."
"You will be disciplined later. In the meantime, you're on snacks and drinks duty for this match. Now hop to it. I want a nacho platter and a beer in the next five minutes, or I'm going to chain you to the front of Misato's car for the drive to school tomorrow! Furiosa's got nothing on me!" She vanished back out into the hallway.
Shinji waited a few seconds, then sighed in relief again.
"……are they gone?" whispered a quiet voice from the closet.
Shinji opened the door, releasing the occupant. "Yeah, but you better make your escape now. Misato almost saw you!"
Kozo Fuyutsuki nodded worriedly, hitching up the waistband of his leather trousers. "We can't let anyone know about us, dear. Your father would be furious! And then he'd punish me for cheating on him!"
Shinji patted his cheek. "I know, my pet. He'd hate to hear you traded up for the newer, better model Ikari. Now fly! Fly like winged monkeys!"
+++
What, you think I forgot what day it was?
How about some more versions?
++++
She grabbed tomorrow's clothes out of her dresser and tiptoed to the door, sliding it open silently. A cautious glance down the hall showed no signs of any activity from Misato's room. She ghosted across the hall, even holding her breath for extra silence. She slipped the door to Shinji's room open and closed in under two seconds. She tucked her bundle of clothes into the corner by the door. Rising from where she'd bent over, she almost jumped in alarm when she turned around to find Shinji already sitting up and staring at her, confusion melting into a warm smile that sparked a matching one on her face. "Hey..."
Her answering smile froze in panic as the large lump in bed next to Shinji stirred and sleepily said "Mmmm, it is morning already, Shinji? I passed out after round 4."
Asuka looked in shock as the slender form of Rei Ayanami sat up next to her boyfriend. "What?! What?! WHAT THE HELL, SHINJI?!"
Shinji shrugged sheepishly. "Well, I was trying to think of what to get you for your birthday, and I've seen how you've been looking at Rei for the last couple weeks and making comments about 'Israfel Specials', so I thought 'Hey, why not get her a Rei?', but then I thought, 'Hmm, we better practice first like we did with the real Israfel, since synchronization in a dual attack is important, so… I invited Rei over to practice."
Asuka looked stunned, her eyes sweeping back and forth from Shinji to Rei and back. "You snuck our best friend into your bed and had wild nookie with her at least 4 times tonight so you could 'practice' for setting up a birthday threesome with me?"
"Uh….yes, yes I did."
"I… I…"
"Yes?"
"You are the best boyfriend ever. Welp, the surprise is blown, so might as well enjoy it! Make room, Asuka Langley Soryu coming in for a landing!" She dove for the bed. Rei squeaked nicely when Asuka landed on her.
++++
I know a bunch of you want me to make that one canon, too.
How about another one?
++++
She grabbed tomorrow's clothes out of her dresser and tiptoed to the door, sliding it open silently. A cautious glance down the hall showed no signs of any activity from Misato's room. She ghosted across the hall, even holding her breath for extra silence. She slipped the door to Shinji's room open and closed in under two seconds. She tucked her bundle of clothes into the corner by the door. Rising from where she'd bent over, she almost jumped in alarm when she turned around to find Shinji already sitting up and staring at her, confusion melting into a warm smile that sparked a matching one on her face. "Hey..."
Her answering smile froze in panic as the large lump in bed next to Shinji stirred and sleepily said "Mmmm, it is morning, Shin-chan? I don't want to get up already. You kept me up half the night!"
Asuka stared in utter confusion as she sat up in the bed next to Shinji. Asuka stared at Asuka. Eventually, she turned her disbelieving eyes to Shinji. "Ok, what the fuck? Did I suddenly grow a twin sister? I am not Gogo Ayo Gigamoto Bomango!"
"Humph! I am not your identical twin sister, Soryu," the strawberry blonde in the bed declared. "I'm the newer and improved model! Shikinami superior, Soryu inferior!"
Asuka (Soryu-type) started to glow red. "Oh, that does it, you cheap copy! When I'm done with you, you're going to need more than a 'Rebuild'!" She pulled back a glowing fist and launched herself at the girl on the bed.
She never made it, as Asuka (Shikinami-type) flew out of bed right back at her, meeting her fist-to-fist in midair.
A vicious martial arts battle began in the air in the middle of the room. It did not stay there long, as the battle aura boosted punches quickly blew out the wall and took the fight into the air over the apartment building.
Shinji looked out the hole. Things had escalated: Asuka (Shikinami-type) now sported a spiky mass of glowing gold hair that stuck straight up, while Asuka (Soryu-type) was now shooting beams of psychic force from her forehead. Shinji shook his head and sighed. "I should have known something was wrong when she started talking about 'Beast Mode'."
"Are they gone?" a voice whispered from under the bed.
Shinji nodded. "Yeah, you should make a break for it now, Mari. I think they're both distracted."
Mari Illustrious Makinami gave him a peck on the cheek as she bounced over to the hole in the wall and leapt out, immediately pulling the ripcord on her parachute. "Yeehaa! See you next Thursday, Puppy-kun!"
Shinji waved. "As usual, Mari. G'night."
+++
What, you think we're done? Not even!
+++
She grabbed tomorrow's clothes out of her dresser and tiptoed to the door, sliding it open silently. A cautious glance down the hall showed no signs of any activity from Misato's room. She ghosted across the hall, even holding her breath for extra silence. She slipped the door to Shinji's room open and closed in under two seconds. She tucked her bundle of clothes into the corner by the door. Rising from where she'd bent over, she almost jumped in alarm when she turned around to find Shinji already sitting up and staring at her, confusion melting into a warm smile that sparked a matching one on her face. "Hey..."
Her answering smile froze in panic as the large lump in bed next to Shinji stirred and sleepily said "Mmmm, it is morning, Ikari-kun? I don't want to get up already. You kept me up half the night!"
Asuka stared in shock at the grey-haired prettyboy sitting up in bed next to Shinji. "I… what the Hell, Shinji? The transfer student? He hasn't even arrived yet!"
Shinji blushed and hid his face in Kaworu's chest. "Well, we ran into each other on the way back from the shops before dinner, and he said he wanted to show me a 'whole new world'. Then he started singing Disney songs. You know how show tunes are my weakness…"
Asuka nodded. It was true. A few lines from 'My Fair Lady', and Shinji was putty in her hands. So the new kid had stumbled upon the same knowledge? So be it. "Alright, I'm still mad at you for not letting me know. You two get ready for round two, I'm going to get some popcorn and a nice chair, since yaoi is hot."
Kaworu spoke up. "Do I get a vote in this, Miss Soryu?"
"Quiet, Sparkles. You owe me for one ride on the Shinji Express. Now get to the boy-love, or I'll call in Rei with her flamethrower. She's been reading 'Shinji & Warhammer 40k', you know."
"I'll be good!"
+++
But wait, there's one more!
+++
She grabbed tomorrow's clothes out of her dresser and tiptoed to the door, sliding it open silently. A cautious glance down the hall showed no signs of any activity from Misato's room. She ghosted across the hall, even holding her breath for extra silence. She slipped the door to Shinji's room open and closed in under two seconds. She tucked her bundle of clothes into the corner by the door. Rising from where she'd bent over, she almost jumped in alarm when she turned around to find Shinji already sitting up and staring at her, confusion melting into a warm smile that sparked a matching one on her face. "Hey..."
Her answering smile froze in panic as the small lump in bed next to Shinji stirred and sleepily said "Wark!"
Asuka just blinked. "Wut."
"Oh Hiiiiiiiii~, Asuka!" Shinji said, wobbling back and forth. "I thought you'd melted into zebras."
"Ok, what the Hell, Shinji? I could understand you cheating with me with Misato, or Rei, or some other girl. Or maybe even a boy. But a penguin?!"
Shinji giggled and stared at her. Well, in her general vicinity. Vaguely. His eyes were tracking independently in different directions. "Pen Pen was so sweet. He just came into my room singing Spanish love ballads and swept me off my feet. They're right, you know. 'Once you go penguin, you stardust pencil treetop brick. Purple monkey dishwasher." He nodded sagely and fell over.
"Wark."
Asuka glared at the penguin. "I can tell he's higher than a kite, thanks. And you are such a bitch for taking advantage of him like this."
"Wark wark."
"What do you mean, 'it's not my fault'?! If you didn't drug him, who did?"
"Father came by with the drug supply he promised us back in his office. And it's the good shit! I can see through tiiiii~me!" Shinji warbled from the bed. He appeared to be making a vigorous effort to grab the invisible fairies floating around his face.
Asuka glared at him. "Gott damn it, Third, you should know better. Don't trust your father, he's a lunatic."
"That's why I only take the homemade LSD I mix in the sink!" Misato declared from a hole in the ceiling. "Wheee! I'm in the crawlspace again! Ceiling Misato is watching you masturbate! Hee hee hee!" There was a series of thuds and then Misato began to meow loudly.
"I am not talking you two down again. I'm going to Rei's place to get some peace and quiet. And maybe some yuri." Asuka spun on her heel and stomped off down the hall.
"Wait for meeeeeeee, Asuka! I must follow the butterflies! Hippo hippo hippo giraffe BEEEEEEES!" Shinji shouted cheerily, springing up to run after her.
"….are they gone?" a voice whispered from under the bed.
Pen Pen nodded. "Wark."
Hikari Horaki and Ritsuko Akagi carefully squeezed themselves out from the cramped and overcrowded hiding place. "Whew! I thought we were caught for sure!" the brunette declared. "Oh well, this is still less crowded than your place, Pen Pen."
"Same time next week, honey?" Ritsuko asked?
"Wark!"
+++
Ok, now back to work. Update tonight!
CV12Hornet
Riter.
- Location
- Tacoma, Washington
HULK IS CONFUSED BY WHAT HULK JUST READ.
samdamandias
Apprentice Plane Wizard
Yes, but real update when?What, you think I forgot what day it was?
How about some more versions?
*reads rest of post*
Oh. Carry on then.
Turing Decidable
𝕘𝕒𝕣𝕗
- Location
- Belgium
- Pronouns
- He/Him
We're doomed. Doomed, I tell you! DOOMED!
Knightfall
Nui lover and Slaaneshi
- Location
- New York, New York
And it is going to be glorious.
Always Late
Lacking in coffee, sleep, and brains
- Location
- Ohio
Jokes on you, Halt already prepared me!
... A moderator is making a morning-after joke involving Misato and Shinji.
Moving on!
Yeah, that's about how I expected the Misato who was more interested in sex than studying would act.
Everything is forgiven Strypgia.
But you do get an A for that reference.
... even more squick jokes from a mod.
EEEEEEEEEEEEH?What, you think I forgot what day it was?
How about some more versions?
Obligatory, and what's probably going to forgive this for alot of people.
Isn't there a meme/video clip around this premise?I know a bunch of you want me to make that one canon, too.
How about another one?
The Rebuild reference.
OK, that got a chuckle out of me. Still makes me want a Soryu/Shinikami character-play off story, but this is good too.
More?
I don't care what laws of time and space you Angels think you can warp and bend, YOU WILL EAT BUCKSHOT AND D-
... never mind.
What sort of time-sink did she put out to get to that point in that messy goliath of a story?
Good. Your execution has been stayed. Make the Boss-lady happy, and that might just become permeant.
... wat.
Quick Asuka, grab his shotgun before he hurts somebody!
... Misato, your internet privileges have been revoked. Also, I will never get that image out of my head, you son of a bitch.
Geez, when you said the writing bug bit you, you weren't kidding.Ok, now back to work. Update tonight!
Knightfall
Nui lover and Slaaneshi
- Location
- New York, New York
It was beautiful.
- Location
- Illinois
So, the writing bug bit, the muses were kind, and the creek didn't rise. Time for an update!
@JohnnyAdroit, @Scottsman, @akrasiel23, @Zaxxon, @Heimdall1342, @Epsilon Rose, @MondoMage, @Nyrath, @Farialyton, this is for you guys.
Chapter 8.26 lololol not really. April Fools!
Advent
+++
With some difficulty, she punched in the short designator for the pre-saved number. It rang several times. This was not surprising; it was very late. Or very early, really.
Click. "...Yes?"
Ritsuko swallowed. ".....I ....need your help."
There was a long pause. ".....now?"
"Yes."
Another long pause. "...Your apartment?"
Ritsuko almost sobbed in relief. "Yes," she gasped.
The call disconnected. She sagged back onto the bed, the phone falling out of her hand to lay beside her. The apartment was still dark, cold, and still... but now she didn't feel quite so alone.
+++
Her eyes snapped open, a weak, mumbled cry of alarm halfway out of her mouth before she was fully awake. She sat up, rubbing at her eyes, trying to slow down her hammering heartbeat and heaving breaths.
"Gott damn it... Misato, this is your fucking fault." She hadn't had a nightmare in weeks. Months. Not once since Shinji had started sleeping beside her. But now they were back, and she knew why: It had been almost a week now since Misato had asked/told them to sleep separately until she decided how she was going to react to learning they were together. It had been bad enough the first night, with her sleep restless and unsettled, and it had only gotten worse each passing day. Now she was waking up from a nightmare that she couldn't quite remember...
She clutched at her chest. No... she only wished she couldn't remember. Enough stuck with her, more than enough to send another wave of shivering down her body. She shot a look at the clock by her bed. 4:23 am.
Asuka bit her lip for a second, but then got out of bed, muttering, "...that's it. I can't stand this anymore. Sorry, Misato, but I need him."
She grabbed tomorrow's clothes out of her dresser and tiptoed to the door, sliding it open silently. A cautious glance down the hall showed no signs of any activity from Misato's room. She ghosted across the hall, even holding her breath for extra silence. She slipped the door to Shinji's room open and closed in under two seconds. She tucked her bundle of clothes into the corner by the door. Rising from where she'd bent over, she almost jumped in alarm when she turned around to find Shinji already sitting up and staring at her, confusion melting into a warm smile that sparked a matching one on her face. "Hey..."
Her answering smile froze in panic as the large lump in bed next to Shinji stirred and sleepily said "Mmmm, it is morning already, Shin-chan? I don't want to get up. You kept me up half the night!"
Asuka looked from Shinji to the lump and back, panic giving way to confusion and betrayal. "Shinji, what the fuck is-"
The lump sat up, the white sheets falling away to reveal purple hair and a truly impressive bust for a Japanese woman. "Oh, hey, Asuka," Misato said, rubbing at her eyes. "Did you want something?"
"Yes, but apparently you got it first! What the Hell, Misato?!" the redhead screeched. "He literally half your age, and, not to put too fine a point on it, my boyfriend! You've got Kaji! I never even got a piece of him!"
"Well, you kept bragging about how good Shinji is, and I got kind of curious, so when I came by his room tonight to talk about letting you two get back to sleeping together I demanded he prove it as part of the deal. And woooo did he! I may have to ask if I can have two days a week, Asuka. I mean, dayum. I thought my toenails were going to curl, no joke. We're going to have to start calling Shinji 'Mister Third Impact', since he hits that like the fist of an angry god!"
"That. Is. IT!" Asuka shouted. She walked over to the bed and yanked Misato out of it by her hair. "You and me, Boobasaurus! Strip Chess match in the living room, right now! Winner gets both boytoys for a week! Loser pays for dinner!"
"But I'm only wearing a blanket, and you're just in a shirt and panties!"
"Then you better play really well, bitch!" Asuka dragged her out of the room by her hair.
Shinji let out a relieved sigh. "Well, at least she didn't kill m-"
Asuka stuck her head back in the door. "And you, Third Child! Don't think I've forgotten about you! You have any idea how much trouble you are in right now?"
"Errrrr….."
"For not inviting me?"
"……wut."
"Look, I am the alpha bitch around here! I'm the one in charge of this harem. You get to play with what I say you can play with. And you did not ask permission for this, did you?"
"………um, no, Mistress."
"You will be disciplined later. In the meantime, you're on snacks and drinks duty for this match. Now hop to it. I want a nacho platter and a beer in the next five minutes, or I'm going to chain you to the front of Misato's car for the drive to school tomorrow! Furiosa's got nothing on me!" She vanished back out into the hallway.
Shinji waited a few seconds, then sighed in relief again.
"……are they gone?" whispered a quiet voice from the closet.
Shinji opened the door, releasing the occupant. "Yeah, but you better make your escape now. Misato almost saw you!"
Kozo Fuyutsuki nodded worriedly, hitching up the waistband of his leather trousers. "We can't let anyone know about us, dear. Your father would be furious! And then he'd punish me for cheating on him!"
Shinji patted his cheek. "I know, my pet. He'd hate to hear you traded up for the newer, better model Ikari. Now fly! Fly like winged monkeys!"
+++
What, you think I forgot what day it was?
How about some more versions?
++++
She grabbed tomorrow's clothes out of her dresser and tiptoed to the door, sliding it open silently. A cautious glance down the hall showed no signs of any activity from Misato's room. She ghosted across the hall, even holding her breath for extra silence. She slipped the door to Shinji's room open and closed in under two seconds. She tucked her bundle of clothes into the corner by the door. Rising from where she'd bent over, she almost jumped in alarm when she turned around to find Shinji already sitting up and staring at her, confusion melting into a warm smile that sparked a matching one on her face. "Hey..."
Her answering smile froze in panic as the large lump in bed next to Shinji stirred and sleepily said "Mmmm, it is morning already, Shinji? I passed out after round 4."
Asuka looked in shock as the slender form of Rei Ayanami sat up next to her boyfriend. "What?! What?! WHAT THE HELL, SHINJI?!"
Shinji shrugged sheepishly. "Well, I was trying to think of what to get you for your birthday, and I've seen how you've been looking at Rei for the last couple weeks and making comments about 'Israfel Specials', so I thought 'Hey, why not get her a Rei?', but then I thought, 'Hmm, we better practice first like we did with the real Israfel, since synchronization in a dual attack is important, so… I invited Rei over to practice."
Asuka looked stunned, her eyes sweeping back and forth from Shinji to Rei and back. "You snuck our best friend into your bed and had wild nookie with her at least 4 times tonight so you could 'practice' for setting up a birthday threesome with me?"
"Uh….yes, yes I did."
"I… I…"
"Yes?"
"You are the best boyfriend ever. Welp, the surprise is blown, so might as well enjoy it! Make room, Asuka Langley Soryu coming in for a landing!" She dove for the bed. Rei squeaked nicely when Asuka landed on her.
++++
I know a bunch of you want me to make that one canon, too.
How about another one?
++++
She grabbed tomorrow's clothes out of her dresser and tiptoed to the door, sliding it open silently. A cautious glance down the hall showed no signs of any activity from Misato's room. She ghosted across the hall, even holding her breath for extra silence. She slipped the door to Shinji's room open and closed in under two seconds. She tucked her bundle of clothes into the corner by the door. Rising from where she'd bent over, she almost jumped in alarm when she turned around to find Shinji already sitting up and staring at her, confusion melting into a warm smile that sparked a matching one on her face. "Hey..."
Her answering smile froze in panic as the large lump in bed next to Shinji stirred and sleepily said "Mmmm, it is morning, Shin-chan? I don't want to get up already. You kept me up half the night!"
Asuka stared in utter confusion as she sat up in the bed next to Shinji. Asuka stared at Asuka. Eventually, she turned her disbelieving eyes to Shinji. "Ok, what the fuck? Did I suddenly grow a twin sister? I am not Gogo Ayo Gigamoto Bomango!"
"Humph! I am not your identical twin sister, Soryu," the strawberry blonde in the bed declared. "I'm the newer and improved model! Shikinami superior, Soryu inferior!"
Asuka (Soryu-type) started to glow red. "Oh, that does it, you cheap copy! When I'm done with you, you're going to need more than a 'Rebuild'!" She pulled back a glowing fist and launched herself at the girl on the bed.
She never made it, as Asuka (Shikinami-type) flew out of bed right back at her, meeting her fist-to-fist in midair.
A vicious martial arts battle began in the air in the middle of the room. It did not stay there long, as the battle aura boosted punches quickly blew out the wall and took the fight into the air over the apartment building.
Shinji looked out the hole. Things had escalated: Asuka (Shikinami-type) now sported a spiky mass of glowing gold hair that stuck straight up, while Asuka (Soryu-type) was now shooting beams of psychic force from her forehead. Shinji shook his head and sighed. "I should have known something was wrong when she started talking about 'Beast Mode'."
"Are they gone?" a voice whispered from under the bed.
Shinji nodded. "Yeah, you should make a break for it now, Mari. I think they're both distracted."
Mari Illustrious Makinami gave him a peck on the cheek as she bounced over to the hole in the wall and leapt out, immediately pulling the ripcord on her parachute. "Yeehaa! See you next Thursday, Puppy-kun!"
Shinji waved. "As usual, Mari. G'night."
+++
What, you think we're done? Not even!
+++
She grabbed tomorrow's clothes out of her dresser and tiptoed to the door, sliding it open silently. A cautious glance down the hall showed no signs of any activity from Misato's room. She ghosted across the hall, even holding her breath for extra silence. She slipped the door to Shinji's room open and closed in under two seconds. She tucked her bundle of clothes into the corner by the door. Rising from where she'd bent over, she almost jumped in alarm when she turned around to find Shinji already sitting up and staring at her, confusion melting into a warm smile that sparked a matching one on her face. "Hey..."
Her answering smile froze in panic as the large lump in bed next to Shinji stirred and sleepily said "Mmmm, it is morning, Ikari-kun? I don't want to get up already. You kept me up half the night!"
Asuka stared in shock at the grey-haired prettyboy sitting up in bed next to Shinji. "I… what the Hell, Shinji? The transfer student? He hasn't even arrived yet!"
Shinji blushed and hid his face in Kaworu's chest. "Well, we ran into each other on the way back from the shops before dinner, and he said he wanted to show me a 'whole new world'. Then he started singing Disney songs. You know how show tunes are my weakness…"
Asuka nodded. It was true. A few lines from 'My Fair Lady', and Shinji was putty in her hands. So the new kid had stumbled upon the same knowledge? So be it. "Alright, I'm still mad at you for not letting me know. You two get ready for round two, I'm going to get some popcorn and a nice chair, since yaoi is hot."
Kaworu spoke up. "Do I get a vote in this, Miss Soryu?"
"Quiet, Sparkles. You owe me for one ride on the Shinji Express. Now get to the boy-love, or I'll call in Rei with her flamethrower. She's been reading 'Shinji & Warhammer 40k', you know."
"I'll be good!"
+++
But wait, there's one more!
+++
She grabbed tomorrow's clothes out of her dresser and tiptoed to the door, sliding it open silently. A cautious glance down the hall showed no signs of any activity from Misato's room. She ghosted across the hall, even holding her breath for extra silence. She slipped the door to Shinji's room open and closed in under two seconds. She tucked her bundle of clothes into the corner by the door. Rising from where she'd bent over, she almost jumped in alarm when she turned around to find Shinji already sitting up and staring at her, confusion melting into a warm smile that sparked a matching one on her face. "Hey..."
Her answering smile froze in panic as the small lump in bed next to Shinji stirred and sleepily said "Wark!"
Asuka just blinked. "Wut."
"Oh Hiiiiiiiii~, Asuka!" Shinji said, wobbling back and forth. "I thought you'd melted into zebras."
"Ok, what the Hell, Shinji? I could understand you cheating with me with Misato, or Rei, or some other girl. Or maybe even a boy. But a penguin?!"
Shinji giggled and stared at her. Well, in her general vicinity. Vaguely. His eyes were tracking independently in different directions. "Pen Pen was so sweet. He just came into my room singing Spanish love ballads and swept me off my feet. They're right, you know. 'Once you go penguin, you stardust pencil treetop brick. Purple monkey dishwasher." He nodded sagely and fell over.
"Wark."
Asuka glared at the penguin. "I can tell he's higher than a kite, thanks. And you are such a bitch for taking advantage of him like this."
"Wark wark."
"What do you mean, 'it's not my fault'?! If you didn't drug him, who did?"
"Father came by with the drug supply he promised us back in his office. And it's the good shit! I can see through tiiiii~me!" Shinji warbled from the bed. He appeared to be making a vigorous effort to grab the invisible fairies floating around his face.
Asuka glared at him. "Gott damn it, Third, you should know better. Don't trust your father, he's a lunatic."
"That's why I only take the homemade LSD I mix in the sink!" Misato declared from a hole in the ceiling. "Wheee! I'm in the crawlspace again! Ceiling Misato is watching you masturbate! Hee hee hee!" There was a series of thuds and then Misato began to meow loudly.
"I am not talking you two down again. I'm going to Rei's place to get some peace and quiet. And maybe some yuri." Asuka spun on her heel and stomped off down the hall.
"Wait for meeeeeeee, Asuka! I must follow the butterflies! Hippo hippo hippo giraffe BEEEEEEES!" Shinji shouted cheerily, springing up to run after her.
"….are they gone?" a voice whispered from under the bed.
Pen Pen nodded. "Wark."
Hikari Horaki and Ritsuko Akagi carefully squeezed themselves out from the cramped and overcrowded hiding place. "Whew! I thought we were caught for sure!" the brunette declared. "Oh well, this is still less crowded than your place, Pen Pen."
"Same time next week, honey?" Ritsuko asked?
"Wark!"
+++
Ok, now back to work. Update tonight!
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I can't decide whether to be happy about all the giggling or sad it wasnt fluffiiii... Qq
Prince Charon
Just zis guy, you know?
That's a lot of effort for a fairly obvious prank.
The Fourth Monado
S U B A R A S H I I
- Location
- Away
Fun, though.
Oh, and @Strypgia ?
LSD doesn't work that way. You hardly ever get giddy from it.
What you have described is actually much closer to dem 'shrooms. Except for vivid hippo hallucinations.
Whatever in the world you need to know about drugs, you talk to me.
edit: emphasis. Do your research!
LSD doesn't work that way. You hardly ever get giddy from it.
What you have described is actually much closer to dem 'shrooms. Except for vivid hippo hallucinations.
Whatever in the world you need to know about drugs, you talk to me.
edit: emphasis. Do your research!
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