Well... once again, this got far longer than I planned or expected. 3300 words, and we're still trucking on Chapter 8. Shinji and Asuka have to come clean on another secret.
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Chapter 8.16
Advent
++++++++++++++++++++
"Asuka, this is serious..." Shinji said softly to her as he brought back more washcloths to the table to wipe Rei's face with. The bluenette had been intermittently vomiting into the sink and a bucket for the last 2 hours.
The redhead shook her head again. "I said I don't want to."
"Asuka, neither one of us is a doctor. We can't... it's not safe for
Rei to have to rely on just us for this! Look at her!" Shinji stood next to her and rubbed Rei's back again. She was shaking more violently now.
"Feel... my feet. But... not," Rei slurred. "They're not my feet. I don't have any legs. They cut them off, made a puppet out of them... Can't move... My hands hurt..." She looked up at her two friends. "Why do my hands hurt?" Her head slumped back down onto the kitchen table.
Asuka chewed her lower lip. "I...damn it, Shinji! You know how I feel about this! My step-mother tried medicating away my problems with drugs when I was seven! Tried to make
me into a peaceful little doll! I know what it's like to have drugs making your head feel like it doesn't belong to you anymore. Better living through chemistry!" Asuka spat. "And I'm none too happy learning NERV has been doing the same to my friend for who the Hell knows how long! I don't trust any of them!"
"You know Misato-san's not like that," her boyfriend countered. "You said yourself she was your best guardian besides Kaji-san, and she said she was at least considering keeping you and I secret from NERV and my father. And..." Shinji's face got starker. "If we can't trust Misato-san with this, who can we trust? We're still just kids, Asuka. We're not doctors, not... we need help on this. There's no way we can cover this up. Rei's in no shape to go to school tomorrow, and there's no way Misato-san will believe Rei and both of us have suddenly all gotten sick together and need the day off from school."
"I
know!" Asuka almost shouted. "I'm as worried about her as you are, you know that! I lo-..." she stumbled hard on the word. "...I love Rei as much as you do. And I know even better than you just how... how bad Benzodiazepine withdrawal syndrome can get. I just... I don't trust anyone connected to NERV about this. NERV
did this to her! I know Misato is... agh, it's still hard, alright? I...nnng..." Asuka ran her hands through her hair in frustration
"Neither one of us wants to leave Rei's side right now, but if we're not home when she gets there, working on homework and making dinner, she's going to notice no matter what," Shinji pointed out. "We have to say
something to her soon. She'll be home within half an hour..." He looked nervously at the clock on the kitchen wall.
Asuka sat down on the other side of Rei, taking Rei's shaking hand, trying to still the vibration. "Damn it. I was hoping we could just... I don't know, tell her we were having a sleep-over here for the night to celebrate seeing Rei again after a week."
"She'd just think we were trying to get out from under her eye for sleeping together," Shinji predicted sadly.
Asuka shook her head. "I'm pretty sure she knows we've been good about that. Trying to convince her she can treat us as mature adults about it. Which I hate, by the way." Asuka rubbed at her eyes. "I slept like shit again. No nightmares, but... I can feel them, waiting. I want you back in bed with me, Shinji. I need you."
"Me too. The sleep, I mean," Shinji nodded. "A-and the... needing you. My room's just too... empty and quiet alone." He looked down at Rei, still patting her back.
"My body is still sleeping down below. This body isn't my body. I can't move. I feel cold. Bleeding, bleeding, but I don't bleed. I... I've never bled. Not like that. Only from the wounds. They never stop bleeding..." Rei mumbled. "And the other me in the body of the other flesh is screams so much. She hurts, and I hurt too when I sit in her... but I have to. I have to protect you both..."
Shinji paused in his patting and looked at Rei, his worry visibly increasing. "Asuka... we can't handle this alone. Rei's... not sounding very coherent. We... we need to trust Misato."
"Damn damn damn... even if we move Rei over to our apartment and put her in my room for the 'sleepover', Misato will want to see her," Asuka said half to herself. "Nnnnng.... Fine! You trust her, baka mine, and I trust you. So... I'll tell her. And hope to Gott you're right about her."
Asuka let go of Rei's hand and began gathering up the medical lockbox and supplies they'd been using. "Start walking her over to our apartment and get her settled on our room. I'll grab some of her clothes and things so she can really stay over. I think she's going to need it. And I'll explain to Misato why she's hooked up to an IV drip and babbling crazy shit. We go full disclosure: we tell her about the drugs, that we got Rei off them over the last three months, and," Asuka's mouth twisted in a sour expression. "That Doctor Malpractice may have just shoved Rei right into an Benzodiazepine overdose, plus all those other dissociatives and other nastiness in that cocktail."
Shinji just nodded. "I know Misato-san won't let us down." He helped Rei to her feet, and started her towards the door, the IV stand in tow.
Asuka set her jaw. "I hope you're right."
+++
Misato's hand twitched and started to rise, and again she forced it down. She was not some lovestruck teenager like Shinji or Asuka. She didn't need to march around holding her boyfriend's (Boyfriend!
Boyfriend!) hand to prove to herself or the world that they were together again. Besides, the apartment door was just ahead, and they'd be inside in a moment. No time to show off anyhow.
She fought down another elated giggle that tried to escape. Still, it was tempting...
She swiped her keycard through the lock and spun in place to snag another kiss from Kaji as he followed close behind her. He happily complied, his hands slipping down to encircle her waist as she drew him through the door and down the hall to the kitchen.
She broke the kiss with a grin. "So, I hope whatever Shin-chan was making for dinner can handle one more mouth, since you're staying the night."
Kaji's eyebrows went up. For all the times Misato had stayed over at his place over the last several weeks, he'd never been allowed to stay over at her apartment. Unspoken by both of them was the recognition that step would have been admitting they weren't just fooling around anymore. Now...
He couldn't stop the sloppy grin. "Guess I'll have to hope no one notices I'm still in yesterday's shirt tomorrow."
"Shinji can run it through the laundry in a hur-... ah... Hi, Asuka."
The Second Child was sitting at the kitchen table, still in her student uniform, calmly watching them as they came in from the entrance hallway. Her hands were carefully folded on the table in front of her. She nodded at them. "Misato. Hello, Kaji. It's good to see you." Her voice was anything but happy.
Misato examined Asuka's serious look and her own amorous smile faded. "What is it?"
"Rei's in my room right now. She'll be staying the night. Maybe the next too, we're not sure," Asuka said.
"A little sleepover is fine, Asuka, but she lives right next door, so...?"
"Shinji's with her right now."
"You trust your boyfriend alone with her? My my..." Misato tried to joke, but it fell flat against Asuka's grim look. "Why is he in there, then?"
"Because my friend is in the middle of a Benzodiazpine overdose, shaking, incoherent, and we're concerned she might go into a coma," Asuka said calmly with no change of tone. "Shinji is staying with her, trying to keep her anchored in the real world. She's been in and out of touch with reality for a while."
Misato froze. She could feel Kaji stiffen likewise behind her. Misato licked her suddenly dry lips. "What?"
"I have your attention? Good." Asuka worked her jaw. "You wanted us to prove we're mature and can be trusted with handling adult matters? Well here it is. I didn't want this. But on the advice and trust of my beloved baka, I'm willing to trust you not to take this to NERV."
Asuka took a deep breath. "For I don't know how long, but at least as far back as Shinji or I have known her and well before that Doctor
Akagi," Asuka snarled the name. "Has been forcing Rei to take a Hell-brew cocktail of sedatives, tranquilizers, dissociatives, mood suppressors, and hormonal contraceptives. Last night Doctor Bitch thought Rei looked too normal, and shot her full of an increased dose. Now she's close to coma and crash from it."
Misato felt cold fingers run down her neck. "Jesus, what the Hell, Asuka?"
"Shinji and I found out about it shortly after Leliel. I spotted the drugs in her old apartment. I
recognized them. My step-mother is a psychiatric doctor. When I failed to be the perfect, placid little
doll she wanted in the wake of... my real mother, she... tried using drugs on me. So when I saw Rei with those, I almost freaked out. She said Doctor Akagi required her to take them daily, and that Commander Ikari had authorized it. That's why she was such a zombie. She was always drugged to the gills."
"Y-... you knew about this
three months ago, and you're just telling me
now?! Asuka, what the Hell were you think-" Misato exclaimed.
"Because NERV
did this to her, Misato! And
you're NERV!" Asuka shouted back, her hands slamming on the table. "Because I've got fucking
issues with authority figures trying to drug me, and finding out that NERV has been drugging the
shit out of my friend made me a little fucking worried about who I could trust anymore! I'm only even willing to do
this because Shinji trusts you, I trust him, and you haven't blown the whistle on us to Commander Asshole! How was I supposed to be sure you'd never do something like this, if this has NERV's full approval?!"
"I'd never-!" Misato shot back, but stopped. "Ritsuko... wait, after Leliel? That was... That's when you came back from visiting her apartment and complaining until I got her moved here. Why didn't...grrr... Ritsuko didn't say a damn word, either."
Misato flexed her hands into tight fists and back again a few times. "Alright." She sat down at the table right across from Asuka, waving for Kaji to sit beside her. She forced her expression into her best military officer face and met Asuka's gaze. "Start from the beginning."
Asuka laid it all out. The drugs, Rei's explanation that NERV required it of her, the daily pills, their decision to help wean Rei off them once Rei had accepted that the drugs were only harming her, the long struggle to help Rei through the withdrawal symptoms... and now Doctor Akagi unknowingly sending a cleaned-out Rei into an overdose. "We've been giving her antagonists she stole from Doctor Akagi's lab, through an IV line since we got home from school. But she's been shaking uncontrollably and babbling incoherently for the last couple hours. Shinji and I need to call in sick to school tomorrow. We're not leaving her, and she's in no shape to even get out of bed right now."
Misato just stared for a long moment. "Goddamit, Rits..." she whispered. "What the Hell are you doing?" Her face hardened. "Alright. Show us to her," she said to Asuka.
Asuka stood up without a word and led them through the living room and down the short hall to her room. She knocked gently, then slid the door open.
Shinji looked up from his seat on the edge of the bed where he sat holding Rei's hand. His gaze flicked worriedly from Kaji to Misato before settling back to Asuka. She just nodded to him, then walked to the far side of the bed to take Rei's other hand.
"H-hello, Kaji-san. Welcome home, Misato-san," Shinji greeted them quietly. He quickly looked back down at Rei.
Misato pursed her lips as she noted the IV drip hanging from the stand by the bed, then looked down at the First Child herself.
The bluenette was shaking intermittently, her eyes darting around without focusing on anything. She was mumbling to herself, "Always dripping. Stupid little boat. Why is it there?"
"She's been just babbling for hours now," Shinji said sadly. "And shaking a lot." He looked at Asuka. "What did she say?"
Asuka just jerked her chin at Misato. "Nothing yet. I just told her that we need to stay with her."
Misato just watched Rei for a moment. "You said she detoxed once already, two months ago?"
Shinji and Asuka nodded together.
"I don't recall anything like this," Misato noted.
"She hadn't just been given a huge 'booster' dose by your friend," Asuka said darkly. She handed Misato a sheet of paper. "This is what she wrote out for us, before she just started shaking and saying disconnected stuff."
Misato took the sheet and scanned it. Rei's recognizable handwriting described Ritsuko's abrupt injection of what she thought was just an increase to Rei's dose. She handed the sheet to Kaji.
He read it just as quickly. "And since Rei was clean, the result was an overdose, mm?" Kaji looked at the list of medications Asuka had written at the bottom. "Jesus, Ritsuko... sedatives, dissociatives... How did Rei even
function under all this? And
why? This is the kind of stuff you give major violent psychotics, not... the First Child."
"Rei's no violent psychotic," Asuka scowled. "You saw what she was like clean over the last several weeks, just more alive and normal. I don't know why they were doing this, but I'm not letting them hurt my friend like that anymore. You've got to let us stay with her tomorrow, Misato. She needs us."
"Then you know why I can't let you stay home, Asuka." Misato put up her hand to forestall Asuka's obvious imminent explosion. "Asuka, you, Rei, and Shinji are three quarters of all the Eva Pilots we
have. You think the three of you can all suddenly 'get sick' and not show up at school and think no one will notice? You and Shinji have to go to school."
"But Misato, we-!" Asuka began.
"Listen to me, Asuka!" Misato said sharply over her. "You wanted to show me you're mature? Bring this to me, asking to help you cover up... whatever the Hell this is they're doing to Rei? Then this is it! I don't know why Ritsuko is doing this, or Commander Ikari is ordering or condoning it, but we
will find out. We all know NERV is up to some strange, dark things. And if you don't want our looking into that to be discovered
we cannot draw attention!" Misato emphasized.
Asuka looked like she was almost in pain. "Please, Misato! Rei needs us!"
"She needs serious medical help, Asuka. Neither you or Shinji are a doctor. What you both
are, however, is a pair of high visibility Pilots whose absence from school will be noticed. I'm not even sure I can keep Rei out of school without it raising flags at NERV HQ." Misato's eyes narrowed. "Speaking of medical attention, why is this the first I'm hearing about Rei being drugged. Why didn't you tell me about this when you complained about her apartment?"
"I already told you; NERV did this to her. You're NERV. We weren't sure who we could trust at all, Misato," Asuka said a little angrily. "If Commander Ikari personally ordered this, who can Shinji and I trust? I'm only trusting you this much because Shinji does, and I knew you and Kaji from before." Asuka looked down at the sweating and shivering First Child. "We didn't tell you or anyone else because... there's not a single doctor in this entire city that doesn't either work for NERV or can't be leaned on by NERV. I know she needs a doctor but... who? Rei is... almost as important to me as Shinji. I... we have to help her, Misato. She needs us the way Shinji and I need each other."
"We will. We'll figure out something," Misato assured her. "But damn it, Asuka, Shinji, this is the kind of thing I need to know about!"
Shinji spoke up. "Misato-san... it's hard for us to trust anyone who's not a Pilot right now. This, and... our mothers..."
Misato wanted to growl at him some more about not being told things this important about her kids, but had to acknowledge the point.
She didn't trust NERV any more than they did right now. "Alright. Well, you get your wish tonight, Asuka. You and Shinji get to sleep next to each other..."
Asuka and Shinji both straightened up and blinked.
"...next to Rei. We're moving her to the living room so all of us can keep watch on her through the night. You both can set up your futons next to her,
on either side," Misato continued. "Asuka, you and I are going to go over everything we can about these drugs and the antagonists while Shinji keeps his eye on her. We'll figure out everything we can do for her right now. Kaji, you think you can find a doctor that can keep their mouth shut that can give us a hand with this? Maybe just an anonymous consult?"
Kaji nodded. "I can find a doc or two, not mention names. At least get some actual trained medical advice on how to deal with overdose and withdrawal like this." He shot a look back towards the kitchen. "Not going to do that on the landline here, though. I'll be back in half an hour." He headed for the door.
Asuka watched him go. "Sorry for interrupting your night, Misato. Guess you and Kaji had your talk?"
Misato nodded. "We did. We said a few things. You and Shinji are still going to have to behave for now. This takes priority."
Asuka and Shinji just nodded acceptance. "That's fine, Misato-san. Rei is... We couldn't sleep happily knowing she was like this. She shouldn't have to be alone right now," Shinji said slowly, looking at the bluenette.
Rei had finally lapsed into a fitful sleep. "Sleeping so long... my children all over... Protect them..." Rei mumbled.
Asuka shook her head. "She hasn't made any sense all afternoon. Whatever's in those drugs she got hit with, it's really messed her up."
"We'll figure out something, Asuka. Worst case, we get her on her feet tomorrow, I drop you all off just out of sight of the school, and as long as she can walk into class and be there for the roll, I can pick her up right after and get her back here," Misato said. "That way she won't prompt an alert from the school about being out sick, and I think I can cover the rest from NERV alerts. She's with a NERV officer, right?" Misato put her hand on Rei's shoulder. "Rei's tough. She's been through worse. She's got you both to support her now. She'll pull through."
Asuka and Shinji looked back to Rei. "I hope so, Misato-san. Rei's... we care about her," Shinji said.
