I eagerly await your rendition of too many cooks in the divine kitchen.
Brockton's Celestial Forge (Worm/Jumpchain)
- Thread starter LordRoustabout
- Start date
I eagerly await your rendition of too many cooks in the divine kitchen.
- Pronouns
- He, his, him, they
No problem. For context on the wedding dress post, the longest wedding dress ever constructed IRL was over 5 miles long, applying Apeiron levels of over the top, and, well, continent spanning dress anyone?
Gregory Crey
Magic is of wonder and terror. Life is so magical.
- Location
- United States
- Pronouns
- He/Him/His
Bonesaw resurrected the long dead Grey Boy in canon, so it likely doesn't matter, or if it does, it only matters after Scion dies and the network is down.
PHO - List of Things that the Celestial Forge are no longer allowed to do or contemplate (CorEagle)
- Pronouns
- He, his, him, they
@LordRoustabout and everyone. Here is another PHO omake from the PHO Blacksmithery thread. Come join in, we got a thread on the works there.
On this work, I have noticed something. @Bailey Matutine I KNEW IT. YOU WERE THE ONE WHO KEPT DEVOLVING THE THREAD TO DEGENERACY, DIDN'T YOU!?
Ahem. Continue on.
Survey stared at statistics that one of her subroutines put up.
Morale of the city is low. Extremely low. People are moving out in droves, and there was an uptick of depression in the most-affected area of the city.
The PR for Celestial Forge was…mixed. There was the usual awe and shock at the existence of a team behind Apeiron. There were as many negative comments as well for the amount of collateral and the destruction wrought. People were uncertain, and there were hints of movements that the PRT will be trying to spin it to their end.
This could not stand.
First, she needs to increase the masses' morale. But how? She used her physical body's eyes to look around. Survey has seen many humans do it in search of inspiration.
Her eyes slowly settled on an unassuming post-it note on the fridge…
TWO DAYS LATER
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♦ Topic: List of Things that the Celestial Forge are no longer allowed to do or contemplate
In: Boards ► Places ► America ► Brockton Bay
All_I_Survey (Original Poster) (Verified Celestial Forge) (Verified Cape)
Posted On Apr 21st 2011:
Good afternoon everyone. In an effort to lighten the hearts of everyone in Brockton Bay, I will post the list of things that the members of Apeiron's group, the Celestial Forge, are no longer allowed to do in base or outside. I am mostly the one updating this, while others chimed in from time to time.
1. Apeiron is no longer allowed to make sleeping pills. Half didn't want to consume them on account of them being too beautiful, thereby exacerbating their issues, while the other continuously consumed them into a coma.
2. Do not goad Fleet and Matrix into fighting with their mechs. Training Area 1 is still under repairs, Lethe.
3. Do not replace the contents of Aima's blood bottle with blood-colored juice. She's still angry at you, Lethe.
4. "The Road" is not an acceptable excuse to pull pranks, Fleet. Especially on me.
5. EVERYONE is forbidden from changing the coffee onsite with decaf. As well as outside.
6. Heat-resistant is NOT equal to lava-resistant.
7. ^^^ Seconded.
8. ^^^ Thirded.
9. Everyone is now forbidden from adding frivolous rules that only serve to emphasize certain rules.
10. Do not use Apeiron as a summoning catalyst for your gacha games. No, I don't care how "he always gives the best results!".
11. Do not ask if 'wearing' Garment is pleasurable for her. No, sexual and love lives are off limits.
12. You're just mad that Dadpeiron passed you over.
13. Fleet is now forbidden from posting in the List.
14. Apeiron, you are not allowed to even think about summoning Satan. I am not convinced you would fail.
15. Matrix, you no longer have permission to remake rooms. I couldn't get to bed because you thought it needed to be remade for the 20th time!
16. Do not try to convince the Tinkers of our team into making the best sexual aid they can make for male and female use.
17. No, Matrix is not a "Gundam" and Fleet piloting his mech does not mean they have a illicit relationship.
18. Do not take off your necklaces. Those are the only things that protect you from Thinkers up to Simurgh.
19. Do not try to see if the stealth generator can heat a cup of coffee. Our base would've been revealed to the world if I hadn't taken it off.
20. Do not try to use the matter-fabricator in order to "make a bigger halberd than Armsmaster's then say to him that "mine is bigger than yours.""
21. Apeiron: Survey is no longer allowed to examine the magical sources. I do not want you bluescreening again. (...Acknowledged.)
22. Apeiron: Lethe, please do not tamper with the geases I have. I am enforced to follow them.
23. For that matter, do not try to have Apeiron enter with a geas with you just to have him make something for you. Just ask.
24. However, if it's a matter of getting him to relax...you have the permission of the entire Celestial Forge to force him into that contract.
25. Nanobots are NOT "super tiny legos". I will have you respect them! - Matrix.
More to come soon.
(Showing page 1 of 205)
►FalconOwlShrike
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Alright, miss Survey, this is a great list, very funny, but I have a few questions:
1. What did Apeiron mean when he said you bluescreened?
2. Why do you bluescreen when you look at magic?
3. Why do you have access to magic?
4. Are you aware of how immensely concerning numbers 14 and 18 are, especially without any context beyond a single sentence?
5. What is your opinion on the trolley problem?
►Wharf_Worker
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
*Looks at notes*
*Looks at list*
*Looks back at notes*
You know there is a lot of context that can be gleamed from that list when compared to Apeiron's various feats. And while the content of some of these revelations are a bit disquieting they none the less bring some much needed light on the subject. For we can now say with honest certainty that all the insane, illogical, and confounding events that Apeiron has preformed is that A Wizard Did It.
►IHaveNoMoney
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Looks at rule 23
looks back at rule 18
Can I get a anti ziz necklace
I'll give my firstborn
►John_The_Smith
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Are there any rule against building an actual ape of iron? Bring a whole new meaning to the phrase 800 lbs gorilla.
Why are you guys called the celestial forge anyways? Just curious because most teams have a sort of theme.
Eg: LaserDream & GloryGirl or like the OG wards with MissMilitia and MouseProtector
But your names are all over the place
►Clockblocker (Verified Cape) (Wards ENE)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Okay. I've got a few questions.
First: Isn't Garment a Rouge? Why is she on the list? Is there something we don't know?
Second: Why can Apeiron summon Satan and would the result be worse than an Endbringer?
Third: Oh behalf of the whole Protectorate, can we have some anti-Simurgh necklaces?
Fourth: Where in Brockton Bay is the lava and how can I go see it.
Fifth: Can Apeiron do actual magic, or is it just like Myrddin with his weird powers?
Sixth: Can you post a video of the fight in Training Area 1?
Seventh: Am I legally allowed to ask you for [Redacted by moderators]?
Mod note: First off, you're a Ward and thus underage, so no. Second off, read their rules.
►Robinonboardwalk (Unverified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
>21. Apeiron: Survey is no longer allowed to examine the magical sources. I do not want you bluescreening again.
When you stare into the abyss the abyss stares back; p̷̲̭̜̎́͋h̵̯͇͉̀͛̔'̵̡̢̣́ͅn̶͉͖̉̀͂g̵̯̻̈́̊l̶̘͑̀u̴̹̮̹̇̄͐͊i̶̡̞̫̫͂͋͋ ̷̡̬͐̄m̵͈̘̘̒͐̋͠ģ̵̤̰̟͂͒l̵̼͔͔̈́̕w̵̘̦͙͙͋̑̆'̶̗̍͗̏͘n̵͙̭̳͆̌̅a̵̢͔̹̥͗͐̾̈f̶̧̲̂̀͒h̸̢͍̰̄̑̿̾ ̵̗̔c̴̳̮̻̈́t̸͚̑̇͌h̵̡̳̳̿̈́̽͜u̷̱̲͑̾̄̚l̷̗̘̥̞͆̀̀h̵͉̤́͊̎ụ̶̼̀̉ ̸̨̨̱̱̔r̸̟͎͑̈͒͛'̴̛̜̠̌̈́l̴͕̿̈́̍̑y̴̮̬̌̊e̵̩͝ȟ̸̨̡̖̭͝ ̴̡̠̿w̷͈̝̜͛͗͠g̴͓̅̈a̸͓̥̼͗̂h̸̡̠̭̓͠ͅ'̴̝̥̜̭̋͛̐͝ń̵̝̓̔a̶͇̠̓̍ḡ̴͙̠̭̮̐͊̕l̴̢̨̜̭̋̀̉͋ ̵̝͂͝f̸̥̯̝͒͛̆͛ḩ̸͕̼͍̌t̸̩̊͝a̵̟̋̃g̶͓̑͑͜n̷͖͗̐͆̈.
Okay joking set aside.
In any event I can't wait to see what else is added to that list as time goes on (whether linearly or nonlinearly). Might I suggest that you break that list up into sections one that effects the entire Celestial Forge and then sections dedicated to each member for rules specifically for them?
►All_I_Survey (Original Poster) (Verified Celestial Forge) (Verified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@FalconOwlShrike, regarding your questions:
1. I assumed he meant that was a metaphor for me falling unconscious.
2. Because it is very complex.
5. I believe I know what you are implying here, and no, I am not an artificial intelligence.
Regarding the anti-simurgh necklaces, unfortunately they are extremely time-intensive, resource intensive, and has to be bio-locked in order to have any effectiveness. Not to mention, trust between the tinker and the recipient. I trust Apeiron with my life, and thus I received one.
@Clockblocker:
1. Garment is a vaunted ally, but is still a rogue. She cared for us all, in one way or another. The doors of Celestial Forge is always open for her.
4. In our base.
6. I am currently getting permission. One moment.
@Robinonboardwalk
That can be done when the amount of rules for specific member has reached a certain number.
►Kataklyzein (Verified Celestial Forge) (Verified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Yheds, truyst! Vwery ijmportamt iundeedf! Wse trusrt Azpoeiuron weith oiur lkivesa, asnd he truystsa us in tretyurns.
►Prepin4TheEnd
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@All_I_Survey if you guys made anti-simurgh necklaces do you think get some anti-sinking device for the city
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(Showing page 2 of 205)
►Sothoth
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
So uh, anyone willing to decipher the old god speak that @Kataklyzein said?
►John_The_Smith
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Untranslated Lovecraftian
Yheds, truyst! Vwery ijmportamt iundeedf! Wse trusrt Azpoeiuron weith oiur lkivesa, asnd he truystsa us in tretyurns.
Best guess here
Yes Trust! Very Important indeed! We trust Apeiron with our lives, and he trusts us in return. ?
Guess Kateklyzm has a similiar problem to Garment when it comes to typing
►OhNoMyUsername (Verified Dragon Fanboy)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
>So uh, anyone willing to decipher the old god speak that @Kataklyzein said?
I can give it a shot.
I think they said, "Yes Trust! Very Important indeed! We trust Apeiron with our lives, and he trusts us in return."
Edit: Whoops, looks like I got stranger'd.
►All_I_Survey (Original Poster) (Verified Celestial Forge) (Verified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
None of us speak Lovecraftian, as it is not a language that exists. The language used by the elder gods in the works of author H.P. Lovecraft is called R'lyehian. Currently, I am the only one who speaks this language on the team.
►Sothoth
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
According to number 22, "geases" seem like things that force him to follow them. I'm assuming those are the contracts that he oh so favors? If so, then that's one hell of a way to make sure you dont get cheated out in a contract.
What are geases, anyway?
►ErieDigger
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@Sothoth Traditionally, a geas is a magically imposed obligation or prohibition, placed on a person by some sort of higher power. Be it a fairy, a god, or some monster. Most modern things tend to have them be one-sided, but historically even the ones that weren't 'on the pain of death' tended to have more of a beneficial effect on whoever had one cast upon them. You can think of it as the spell trying to keep the person alive and able to do whatever it was they were forced to do. Increased strength, speed, other abilities, and so on. Usually the breaking the geas isn't fatal or even really harmful aside from the sudden lack of protection that they provided. IE: The hero doesn't die from eating the thing he said he'd never eat, he dies from the sudden lack of incredible strength when he has to fight later that night.
Pronounced with a Hard G, and e like in bed. Gesh.
We can infer from this, though, that yeah your theory regarding Contracts might be right, and in fact might be the same thing. Following his contracts might actually be making him stronger.
►FutureSpinster
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Might I request that Miss Survey please avoid the Palanquin and other singles bars on ladies night in the future? The cute guys can't take their eyes off her. We can't compete with that. Totally not fair.
Apeiron can swing by whenever he wants though. Just saying...
►DandyWingman (Protagonist In The Skies)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
>Do not try to see if the stealth generator can heat a cup of coffee. Our base would've been revealed to the world if I hadn't taken it off.
I'm now very curious, where a base can be that it needs a stealth generator? Under water? In the skies?
And how can a cup of coffee compromise that? Apetech doesn't seem like something easy to break. Boil and spill onto a lens or something like that?
>Do not try to use the matter-fabricator in order to "make a bigger halberd than Armsmaster's then say to him that "mine is bigger than yours.""
Uber and Leet kind of overused that, even if it haven't been used against Armsmaster yet.
Can we request a "mine out-swiss yours" instead? I bet it will be fun to see!
►Twoplustwoisfish
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@Survey 16 means we cant convince the tinkers to make the best sexual aid for male and female use, but what about male OR female use? . . . Asking for a friend, of course.
►Corgeagle
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
The base could be just hiding among the buildings? With stranger-tech to make it so that it looks just like the rest. Though, due to the size of the Celestial Forge, I think their base being in the skies is the most plausible theory yet.
Glory Girl and any fliers out there, mind doing a flyby in the skies for a bit?
Also, @twoplustwoisfish, I assume that it was in the spirit of the rule that NO sexual aids are allowed to be asked of the tinkers.
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►Robinonboardwalk (Unverified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
>None of us speak Lovecraftian, as it is not a language that exists. The language used by the elder gods in the works of author H.P. Lovecraft is called R'lyehian. Currently, I am the only one who speaks this language on the team.
I love how no one even comments on this and I was only half joking about staring into the abyss.
Me thinks Dadpeiron should not let his children look into potential cognito hazards even if they aren't readily apparent as such. Trying to make sense of metaphysics is a challenge and a half, working that out for an omniversal level scale is an exercise in frustration and insanity.
►Wharf_Worker
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Right ignoring whatever Robin is saying that does bring to attention something I'm curious about. I want to hear more about this whole Dadpeiron thing, anyone else wants to discuss that?
►Sothoth
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@Wharf_Worker, based on the context, either it's an inside joke that made its way through the screening process (I assume there was one) or Fleet legitimately sees Apeiron as a father figure.
Not to mention...it seems that he is a single dad.
Cue the squealing of multitudes of fangirls and lonely housewives at the fact that the most badass and handsome cape is a competent single dad whose children love him.
Family-chart maybe?
►DandyWingman (Protagonist In The Skies)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
>based on the context, either it's an inside joke that made its way through the screening process (I assume there was one) or Fleet legitimately sees Apeiron as a father figure.
If the cause of the post was Fleet seeing Apeiron as a father figure I very much doubt he would have referred to Apeiron as a Dadperion in this post. As I understand Fleet is an author of that line. More likely it was meant to highlight some issue between Survey(OP) and Aperion.
There is not enough context at all. But with how Apeiron 'hovers' over Undersiders, it might have easily meant that Survey did not got something, because Apeiron is caring for those 'kids'. As result: Dadpeiron passed you over. Likely our goddess did not get some form of romantical attention, based on the line above that.
Of course it also might have meant that Survey sees Apeiron as a parental figure and seeks approval, but got sidelined because of certain villainous girlfriend getting a shiny new carapace. It might mean that Apeiron sees Survey as someone to care for, but not touch, despite Survey's wishes. Or it was simply a reference to Apeiron's overall attitude towards his team with Survey not getting something the team got.
►ShadesJusticar (Verified Demon)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Look at 24. It seems like Apeiron is a workaholic? It's cute to see his teammates be so worried for him. On the other hand, that's probably the reason why "3 day old" tech is a thing.
...The forcing part is concerning, however.
►JollyGees (Unverified Santa Claus)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@ShadesJusticar
Do you think they're meaning it like forcing him through actual force or through social pressure? You can sort of read it either way but the implications are terrorfying.
But hey at least he had someone to check over his work for him, and I think Matrix his fellow Tinker(?) could help him from accidentally blowing up the city.
►Lethe (Verified Cape) (Verified Little Shit)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
The team likes to bicker. A lot. Apeiron almost seems like a disgruntled father when trying to calm us down, hence the moniker.
Not to mention, his food, man! He makes the greatest food. I swear, the celestial spread (pun intended) he cooks every night is the only reason we need to stay in the team.
►Robinonboardwalk (Unverified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Hi L̷͓̅̾͛̉̄̏̿̿́̒̏̏̈́͂̂̎͂̑͆͐̚̚͝͝e̸͕̾̀͛̒t̴̡̢̧̡̛̘̫͇͍̳̲͚̩̖̲͓̱̬̟͖̼̲͎̘̙̅̀̋͂̍͌͋̎́͐͑̀̿͜͜͝͝͠ͅẖ̸̢̨̧̛̼͉̙̯͕̣̺͈̏̈̉̌̉̐̊̋́̾͑̍̍̽͌͗͘̚͜͠͝e̸̡͓̞͔̯̘̺̦̥̞̰̼̮̩̳̼̝̦̜̯̻̔̈́̏͋̾̈̅̒͐̔̾͂̓̓̈́͌̌̀̐̽͆̏̆̀̊̈́͂́̓͘̚͜ͅͅ how good has Apeiron's food gotten recently any dishes that were particularly memorable?
►FalconOwlShrike
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
I guess I shouldn't be surprised that Apeiron makes rocking food alongside everything else he does, yet somehow, I still am.
Also the image of Apeiron as a grumbling dad is absolutely primo. Which Dad Lines has he used?
►OhNoMyUsername (Verified Dragon Fanboy)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
>Hi L̷͓̅̾͛̉̄̏̿̿́̒̏̏̈́͂̂̎͂̑͆͐̚̚͝͝e̸͕̾̀͛̒t̴̡̢̧̡̛̘̫͇͍̳̲͚̩̖̲͓̱̬̟͖̼̲͎̘̙̅̀̋͂̍͌͋̎́͐͑̀̿͜͜͝͝͠ͅẖ̸̢̨̧̛̼͉̙̯͕̣̺͈̏̈̉̌̉̐̊̋́̾͑̍̍̽͌͗͘̚͜͠͝e̸̡͓̞͔̯̘̺̦̥̞̰̼̮̩̳̼̝̦̜̯̻̔̈́̏͋̾̈̅̒͐̔̾͂̓̓̈́͌̌̀̐̽͆̏̆̀̊̈́͂́̓͘̚͜ͅͅ how good has Apeiron's food gotten recently any dishes that were particularly memorable?
Nice, I love a bad pun!
>I guess I shouldn't be surprised that Apeiron makes rocking food alongside everything else he does, yet somehow, I still am.
Also the image of Apeiron as a grumbling dad is absolutely primo. Which Dad Lines has he used?
Hm... considering how he is with contracts, maybe "As long as you live under my roof, you follow my rules," would fit?
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►XxVoid_CowboyxX
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
If you can make Simurgh shields can you make a device to cure simurgh victims?
►Wharf_Worker
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
I can't believe I'm saying this but Void brings up a good point can Apeiron make something that can cure Simurgh victims? He apparently has some way to verify that the Simurgh can't see him can he do more? Can he block her screams? Can he somehow nullify an Endbringer's power? What are limits to our boundless tinker?
►FleetOfWheel (Verified Cape) (Verified Celestial Forge)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Currently, understanding the workshop's security systems is beyond him.
►Sothoth
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@Fleet From what I know, Tinkertech has ALWAYS been undecipherable, sometimes to tinkers themselves. I would've thought Apeiron is the same, but then you said that the only limit to his understanding was the security systems. Which is terrifying.
Also, @Robinonboardwalk @FalconOwlShrike, the hell are you guys talking about? There's also a space for a name there...
►FleetOfWheel (Verified Cape) (Verified Celestial Forge)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
>I would've thought Apeiron is the same, but then you said that the only limit to his understanding was the security systems.
My apologies, I did not mean to misrepresent the matter. The security system is not the only piece of technology Apeiron cannot decipher. Other examples include the toaster, the n-dimensional privacy curtain, the robotic butler, the home entertainment system, and Lethe's thermos.
►
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@Fleet, Is it a battle butler bot? (Say that three times fast) Please tell me its a battle butler bot, in a dapper suit with a bow tie, I've never wanted something so bad before!
►FleetOfWheel (Verified Cape) (Verified Celestial Forge)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Yes, it is. Garment provided the outfit.
►All_I_Survey (Original Poster) (Verified Celestial Forge) (Verified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@Clockblocker, here is your requested video of "Training Area 1 Accident F-M//ENV//UNU//LP//2011-04-17".
►Clockblocker (Verified Cape) (Wards ENE)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@Survey, thanks for the video. I just showed it to the rest of the Wards and...
Browbeat is unnaturally happy, both Weld and Flechette thought it was cool, Kid Win is off sulking about technology, Shadow Stalker is off being Shadow Stalker, and Vista just fainted.
Pretty cool fight, all things considered. If you like watching Endbrigner sized mechs with weapons to match brawl it out.
►Robinonboardwalk (Unverified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@All_I_Survey
Apeiron v Kataclysm when?
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►Sapphic4Sapphires (Cape Wife)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Apeiron/Kataclysm when?
►Robinonboardwalk (Unverified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
NO! NO SEXING FAMILY! APEIRON! KATACLYSM! BE BETTER THAN YOUR FATHERS/AUNTS/UNCLES/GRANDPARENTS!
►HeliumKnife
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Isn't it against the unwritten rules to tell us that Ape Iron and Cat Astrophe are from Alabama?
►Robinonboardwalk (Unverified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Who said they were from Alabama?
►HeliumKnife
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
How else are we supposed to interpret that fathers/aunts/grandparents bit?
►Robinonboardwalk (Unverified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
They're Greek.
►Wharf_Worker
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Okay moving on before we derail this thread.
Right back on topic, rules! Yes RULES! Let's discuss them!
►Judge (Moderator)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
You are all derailing. Stop this at once. Move it to the Shipping, if you want to.
►unmitigatedDreamer
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
There are some heavy implications in a lot of these rules but I think the important one I want to ask about is what kind of extreme sports did y'all try to play in lava before the fun ended?
End of Page. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 ... 203, 204, 205
Survey closed her laptop. Pleased with the results of her work. There was not much sensitive data in the post, and it seemed like the citizens liked it.
There was no way this could result in something bad happening. Not like Fleet and his damnable Road.
Right?
On this work, I have noticed something. @Bailey Matutine I KNEW IT. YOU WERE THE ONE WHO KEPT DEVOLVING THE THREAD TO DEGENERACY, DIDN'T YOU!?
Ahem. Continue on.
Survey stared at statistics that one of her subroutines put up.
Morale of the city is low. Extremely low. People are moving out in droves, and there was an uptick of depression in the most-affected area of the city.
The PR for Celestial Forge was…mixed. There was the usual awe and shock at the existence of a team behind Apeiron. There were as many negative comments as well for the amount of collateral and the destruction wrought. People were uncertain, and there were hints of movements that the PRT will be trying to spin it to their end.
This could not stand.
First, she needs to increase the masses' morale. But how? She used her physical body's eyes to look around. Survey has seen many humans do it in search of inspiration.
Her eyes slowly settled on an unassuming post-it note on the fridge…
TWO DAYS LATER
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♦ Topic: List of Things that the Celestial Forge are no longer allowed to do or contemplate
In: Boards ► Places ► America ► Brockton Bay
All_I_Survey (Original Poster) (Verified Celestial Forge) (Verified Cape)
Posted On Apr 21st 2011:
Good afternoon everyone. In an effort to lighten the hearts of everyone in Brockton Bay, I will post the list of things that the members of Apeiron's group, the Celestial Forge, are no longer allowed to do in base or outside. I am mostly the one updating this, while others chimed in from time to time.
1. Apeiron is no longer allowed to make sleeping pills. Half didn't want to consume them on account of them being too beautiful, thereby exacerbating their issues, while the other continuously consumed them into a coma.
2. Do not goad Fleet and Matrix into fighting with their mechs. Training Area 1 is still under repairs, Lethe.
3. Do not replace the contents of Aima's blood bottle with blood-colored juice. She's still angry at you, Lethe.
4. "The Road" is not an acceptable excuse to pull pranks, Fleet. Especially on me.
5. EVERYONE is forbidden from changing the coffee onsite with decaf. As well as outside.
6. Heat-resistant is NOT equal to lava-resistant.
7. ^^^ Seconded.
8. ^^^ Thirded.
9. Everyone is now forbidden from adding frivolous rules that only serve to emphasize certain rules.
10. Do not use Apeiron as a summoning catalyst for your gacha games. No, I don't care how "he always gives the best results!".
11. Do not ask if 'wearing' Garment is pleasurable for her. No, sexual and love lives are off limits.
12. You're just mad that Dadpeiron passed you over.
13. Fleet is now forbidden from posting in the List.
14. Apeiron, you are not allowed to even think about summoning Satan. I am not convinced you would fail.
15. Matrix, you no longer have permission to remake rooms. I couldn't get to bed because you thought it needed to be remade for the 20th time!
16. Do not try to convince the Tinkers of our team into making the best sexual aid they can make for male and female use.
17. No, Matrix is not a "Gundam" and Fleet piloting his mech does not mean they have a illicit relationship.
18. Do not take off your necklaces. Those are the only things that protect you from Thinkers up to Simurgh.
19. Do not try to see if the stealth generator can heat a cup of coffee. Our base would've been revealed to the world if I hadn't taken it off.
20. Do not try to use the matter-fabricator in order to "make a bigger halberd than Armsmaster's then say to him that "mine is bigger than yours.""
21. Apeiron: Survey is no longer allowed to examine the magical sources. I do not want you bluescreening again. (...Acknowledged.)
22. Apeiron: Lethe, please do not tamper with the geases I have. I am enforced to follow them.
23. For that matter, do not try to have Apeiron enter with a geas with you just to have him make something for you. Just ask.
24. However, if it's a matter of getting him to relax...you have the permission of the entire Celestial Forge to force him into that contract.
25. Nanobots are NOT "super tiny legos". I will have you respect them! - Matrix.
More to come soon.
►FalconOwlShrike
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Alright, miss Survey, this is a great list, very funny, but I have a few questions:
1. What did Apeiron mean when he said you bluescreened?
2. Why do you bluescreen when you look at magic?
3. Why do you have access to magic?
4. Are you aware of how immensely concerning numbers 14 and 18 are, especially without any context beyond a single sentence?
5. What is your opinion on the trolley problem?
►Wharf_Worker
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
*Looks at notes*
*Looks at list*
*Looks back at notes*
You know there is a lot of context that can be gleamed from that list when compared to Apeiron's various feats. And while the content of some of these revelations are a bit disquieting they none the less bring some much needed light on the subject. For we can now say with honest certainty that all the insane, illogical, and confounding events that Apeiron has preformed is that A Wizard Did It.
►IHaveNoMoney
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Looks at rule 23
looks back at rule 18
Can I get a anti ziz necklace
I'll give my firstborn
►John_The_Smith
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Are there any rule against building an actual ape of iron? Bring a whole new meaning to the phrase 800 lbs gorilla.
Why are you guys called the celestial forge anyways? Just curious because most teams have a sort of theme.
Eg: LaserDream & GloryGirl or like the OG wards with MissMilitia and MouseProtector
But your names are all over the place
►Clockblocker (Verified Cape) (Wards ENE)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Okay. I've got a few questions.
First: Isn't Garment a Rouge? Why is she on the list? Is there something we don't know?
Second: Why can Apeiron summon Satan and would the result be worse than an Endbringer?
Third: Oh behalf of the whole Protectorate, can we have some anti-Simurgh necklaces?
Fourth: Where in Brockton Bay is the lava and how can I go see it.
Fifth: Can Apeiron do actual magic, or is it just like Myrddin with his weird powers?
Sixth: Can you post a video of the fight in Training Area 1?
Seventh: Am I legally allowed to ask you for [Redacted by moderators]?
Mod note: First off, you're a Ward and thus underage, so no. Second off, read their rules.
►Robinonboardwalk (Unverified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
>21. Apeiron: Survey is no longer allowed to examine the magical sources. I do not want you bluescreening again.
When you stare into the abyss the abyss stares back; p̷̲̭̜̎́͋h̵̯͇͉̀͛̔'̵̡̢̣́ͅn̶͉͖̉̀͂g̵̯̻̈́̊l̶̘͑̀u̴̹̮̹̇̄͐͊i̶̡̞̫̫͂͋͋ ̷̡̬͐̄m̵͈̘̘̒͐̋͠ģ̵̤̰̟͂͒l̵̼͔͔̈́̕w̵̘̦͙͙͋̑̆'̶̗̍͗̏͘n̵͙̭̳͆̌̅a̵̢͔̹̥͗͐̾̈f̶̧̲̂̀͒h̸̢͍̰̄̑̿̾ ̵̗̔c̴̳̮̻̈́t̸͚̑̇͌h̵̡̳̳̿̈́̽͜u̷̱̲͑̾̄̚l̷̗̘̥̞͆̀̀h̵͉̤́͊̎ụ̶̼̀̉ ̸̨̨̱̱̔r̸̟͎͑̈͒͛'̴̛̜̠̌̈́l̴͕̿̈́̍̑y̴̮̬̌̊e̵̩͝ȟ̸̨̡̖̭͝ ̴̡̠̿w̷͈̝̜͛͗͠g̴͓̅̈a̸͓̥̼͗̂h̸̡̠̭̓͠ͅ'̴̝̥̜̭̋͛̐͝ń̵̝̓̔a̶͇̠̓̍ḡ̴͙̠̭̮̐͊̕l̴̢̨̜̭̋̀̉͋ ̵̝͂͝f̸̥̯̝͒͛̆͛ḩ̸͕̼͍̌t̸̩̊͝a̵̟̋̃g̶͓̑͑͜n̷͖͗̐͆̈.
Okay joking set aside.
In any event I can't wait to see what else is added to that list as time goes on (whether linearly or nonlinearly). Might I suggest that you break that list up into sections one that effects the entire Celestial Forge and then sections dedicated to each member for rules specifically for them?
►All_I_Survey (Original Poster) (Verified Celestial Forge) (Verified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@FalconOwlShrike, regarding your questions:
1. I assumed he meant that was a metaphor for me falling unconscious.
2. Because it is very complex.
5. I believe I know what you are implying here, and no, I am not an artificial intelligence.
Regarding the anti-simurgh necklaces, unfortunately they are extremely time-intensive, resource intensive, and has to be bio-locked in order to have any effectiveness. Not to mention, trust between the tinker and the recipient. I trust Apeiron with my life, and thus I received one.
@Clockblocker:
1. Garment is a vaunted ally, but is still a rogue. She cared for us all, in one way or another. The doors of Celestial Forge is always open for her.
4. In our base.
6. I am currently getting permission. One moment.
@Robinonboardwalk
That can be done when the amount of rules for specific member has reached a certain number.
►Kataklyzein (Verified Celestial Forge) (Verified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Yheds, truyst! Vwery ijmportamt iundeedf! Wse trusrt Azpoeiuron weith oiur lkivesa, asnd he truystsa us in tretyurns.
►Prepin4TheEnd
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@All_I_Survey if you guys made anti-simurgh necklaces do you think get some anti-sinking device for the city
►Sothoth
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
So uh, anyone willing to decipher the old god speak that @Kataklyzein said?
►John_The_Smith
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Untranslated Lovecraftian
Yheds, truyst! Vwery ijmportamt iundeedf! Wse trusrt Azpoeiuron weith oiur lkivesa, asnd he truystsa us in tretyurns.
Best guess here
Yes Trust! Very Important indeed! We trust Apeiron with our lives, and he trusts us in return. ?
Guess Kateklyzm has a similiar problem to Garment when it comes to typing
►OhNoMyUsername (Verified Dragon Fanboy)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
>So uh, anyone willing to decipher the old god speak that @Kataklyzein said?
I can give it a shot.
I think they said, "Yes Trust! Very Important indeed! We trust Apeiron with our lives, and he trusts us in return."
Edit: Whoops, looks like I got stranger'd.
►All_I_Survey (Original Poster) (Verified Celestial Forge) (Verified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
None of us speak Lovecraftian, as it is not a language that exists. The language used by the elder gods in the works of author H.P. Lovecraft is called R'lyehian. Currently, I am the only one who speaks this language on the team.
►Sothoth
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
According to number 22, "geases" seem like things that force him to follow them. I'm assuming those are the contracts that he oh so favors? If so, then that's one hell of a way to make sure you dont get cheated out in a contract.
What are geases, anyway?
►ErieDigger
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@Sothoth Traditionally, a geas is a magically imposed obligation or prohibition, placed on a person by some sort of higher power. Be it a fairy, a god, or some monster. Most modern things tend to have them be one-sided, but historically even the ones that weren't 'on the pain of death' tended to have more of a beneficial effect on whoever had one cast upon them. You can think of it as the spell trying to keep the person alive and able to do whatever it was they were forced to do. Increased strength, speed, other abilities, and so on. Usually the breaking the geas isn't fatal or even really harmful aside from the sudden lack of protection that they provided. IE: The hero doesn't die from eating the thing he said he'd never eat, he dies from the sudden lack of incredible strength when he has to fight later that night.
Pronounced with a Hard G, and e like in bed. Gesh.
We can infer from this, though, that yeah your theory regarding Contracts might be right, and in fact might be the same thing. Following his contracts might actually be making him stronger.
►FutureSpinster
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Might I request that Miss Survey please avoid the Palanquin and other singles bars on ladies night in the future? The cute guys can't take their eyes off her. We can't compete with that. Totally not fair.
Apeiron can swing by whenever he wants though. Just saying...
►DandyWingman (Protagonist In The Skies)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
>Do not try to see if the stealth generator can heat a cup of coffee. Our base would've been revealed to the world if I hadn't taken it off.
I'm now very curious, where a base can be that it needs a stealth generator? Under water? In the skies?
And how can a cup of coffee compromise that? Apetech doesn't seem like something easy to break. Boil and spill onto a lens or something like that?
>Do not try to use the matter-fabricator in order to "make a bigger halberd than Armsmaster's then say to him that "mine is bigger than yours.""
Uber and Leet kind of overused that, even if it haven't been used against Armsmaster yet.
Can we request a "mine out-swiss yours" instead? I bet it will be fun to see!
►Twoplustwoisfish
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@Survey 16 means we cant convince the tinkers to make the best sexual aid for male and female use, but what about male OR female use? . . . Asking for a friend, of course.
►Corgeagle
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
The base could be just hiding among the buildings? With stranger-tech to make it so that it looks just like the rest. Though, due to the size of the Celestial Forge, I think their base being in the skies is the most plausible theory yet.
Glory Girl and any fliers out there, mind doing a flyby in the skies for a bit?
Also, @twoplustwoisfish, I assume that it was in the spirit of the rule that NO sexual aids are allowed to be asked of the tinkers.
►Robinonboardwalk (Unverified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
>None of us speak Lovecraftian, as it is not a language that exists. The language used by the elder gods in the works of author H.P. Lovecraft is called R'lyehian. Currently, I am the only one who speaks this language on the team.
I love how no one even comments on this and I was only half joking about staring into the abyss.
Me thinks Dadpeiron should not let his children look into potential cognito hazards even if they aren't readily apparent as such. Trying to make sense of metaphysics is a challenge and a half, working that out for an omniversal level scale is an exercise in frustration and insanity.
►Wharf_Worker
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Right ignoring whatever Robin is saying that does bring to attention something I'm curious about. I want to hear more about this whole Dadpeiron thing, anyone else wants to discuss that?
►Sothoth
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@Wharf_Worker, based on the context, either it's an inside joke that made its way through the screening process (I assume there was one) or Fleet legitimately sees Apeiron as a father figure.
Not to mention...it seems that he is a single dad.
Cue the squealing of multitudes of fangirls and lonely housewives at the fact that the most badass and handsome cape is a competent single dad whose children love him.
Family-chart maybe?
►DandyWingman (Protagonist In The Skies)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
>based on the context, either it's an inside joke that made its way through the screening process (I assume there was one) or Fleet legitimately sees Apeiron as a father figure.
If the cause of the post was Fleet seeing Apeiron as a father figure I very much doubt he would have referred to Apeiron as a Dadperion in this post. As I understand Fleet is an author of that line. More likely it was meant to highlight some issue between Survey(OP) and Aperion.
There is not enough context at all. But with how Apeiron 'hovers' over Undersiders, it might have easily meant that Survey did not got something, because Apeiron is caring for those 'kids'. As result: Dadpeiron passed you over. Likely our goddess did not get some form of romantical attention, based on the line above that.
Of course it also might have meant that Survey sees Apeiron as a parental figure and seeks approval, but got sidelined because of certain villainous girlfriend getting a shiny new carapace. It might mean that Apeiron sees Survey as someone to care for, but not touch, despite Survey's wishes. Or it was simply a reference to Apeiron's overall attitude towards his team with Survey not getting something the team got.
►ShadesJusticar (Verified Demon)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Look at 24. It seems like Apeiron is a workaholic? It's cute to see his teammates be so worried for him. On the other hand, that's probably the reason why "3 day old" tech is a thing.
...The forcing part is concerning, however.
►JollyGees (Unverified Santa Claus)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@ShadesJusticar
Do you think they're meaning it like forcing him through actual force or through social pressure? You can sort of read it either way but the implications are terrorfying.
But hey at least he had someone to check over his work for him, and I think Matrix his fellow Tinker(?) could help him from accidentally blowing up the city.
►
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
The team likes to bicker. A lot. Apeiron almost seems like a disgruntled father when trying to calm us down, hence the moniker.
Not to mention, his food, man! He makes the greatest food. I swear, the celestial spread (pun intended) he cooks every night is the only reason we need to stay in the team.
►Robinonboardwalk (Unverified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Hi L̷͓̅̾͛̉̄̏̿̿́̒̏̏̈́͂̂̎͂̑͆͐̚̚͝͝e̸͕̾̀͛̒t̴̡̢̧̡̛̘̫͇͍̳̲͚̩̖̲͓̱̬̟͖̼̲͎̘̙̅̀̋͂̍͌͋̎́͐͑̀̿͜͜͝͝͠ͅẖ̸̢̨̧̛̼͉̙̯͕̣̺͈̏̈̉̌̉̐̊̋́̾͑̍̍̽͌͗͘̚͜͠͝e̸̡͓̞͔̯̘̺̦̥̞̰̼̮̩̳̼̝̦̜̯̻̔̈́̏͋̾̈̅̒͐̔̾͂̓̓̈́͌̌̀̐̽͆̏̆̀̊̈́͂́̓͘̚͜ͅͅ how good has Apeiron's food gotten recently any dishes that were particularly memorable?
►FalconOwlShrike
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
I guess I shouldn't be surprised that Apeiron makes rocking food alongside everything else he does, yet somehow, I still am.
Also the image of Apeiron as a grumbling dad is absolutely primo. Which Dad Lines has he used?
►OhNoMyUsername (Verified Dragon Fanboy)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
>Hi L̷͓̅̾͛̉̄̏̿̿́̒̏̏̈́͂̂̎͂̑͆͐̚̚͝͝e̸͕̾̀͛̒t̴̡̢̧̡̛̘̫͇͍̳̲͚̩̖̲͓̱̬̟͖̼̲͎̘̙̅̀̋͂̍͌͋̎́͐͑̀̿͜͜͝͝͠ͅẖ̸̢̨̧̛̼͉̙̯͕̣̺͈̏̈̉̌̉̐̊̋́̾͑̍̍̽͌͗͘̚͜͠͝e̸̡͓̞͔̯̘̺̦̥̞̰̼̮̩̳̼̝̦̜̯̻̔̈́̏͋̾̈̅̒͐̔̾͂̓̓̈́͌̌̀̐̽͆̏̆̀̊̈́͂́̓͘̚͜ͅͅ how good has Apeiron's food gotten recently any dishes that were particularly memorable?
Nice, I love a bad pun!
>I guess I shouldn't be surprised that Apeiron makes rocking food alongside everything else he does, yet somehow, I still am.
Also the image of Apeiron as a grumbling dad is absolutely primo. Which Dad Lines has he used?
Hm... considering how he is with contracts, maybe "As long as you live under my roof, you follow my rules," would fit?
►XxVoid_CowboyxX
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
If you can make Simurgh shields can you make a device to cure simurgh victims?
►Wharf_Worker
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
I can't believe I'm saying this but Void brings up a good point can Apeiron make something that can cure Simurgh victims? He apparently has some way to verify that the Simurgh can't see him can he do more? Can he block her screams? Can he somehow nullify an Endbringer's power? What are limits to our boundless tinker?
►FleetOfWheel (Verified Cape) (Verified Celestial Forge)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Currently, understanding the workshop's security systems is beyond him.
►Sothoth
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@Fleet From what I know, Tinkertech has ALWAYS been undecipherable, sometimes to tinkers themselves. I would've thought Apeiron is the same, but then you said that the only limit to his understanding was the security systems. Which is terrifying.
Also, @Robinonboardwalk @FalconOwlShrike, the hell are you guys talking about? There's also a space for a name there...
►FleetOfWheel (Verified Cape) (Verified Celestial Forge)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
>I would've thought Apeiron is the same, but then you said that the only limit to his understanding was the security systems.
My apologies, I did not mean to misrepresent the matter. The security system is not the only piece of technology Apeiron cannot decipher. Other examples include the toaster, the n-dimensional privacy curtain, the robotic butler, the home entertainment system, and Lethe's thermos.
►
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@Fleet, Is it a battle butler bot? (Say that three times fast) Please tell me its a battle butler bot, in a dapper suit with a bow tie, I've never wanted something so bad before!
►FleetOfWheel (Verified Cape) (Verified Celestial Forge)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Yes, it is. Garment provided the outfit.
►All_I_Survey (Original Poster) (Verified Celestial Forge) (Verified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@Clockblocker, here is your requested video of "Training Area 1 Accident F-M//ENV//UNU//LP//2011-04-17".
►Clockblocker (Verified Cape) (Wards ENE)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@Survey, thanks for the video. I just showed it to the rest of the Wards and...
Browbeat is unnaturally happy, both Weld and Flechette thought it was cool, Kid Win is off sulking about technology, Shadow Stalker is off being Shadow Stalker, and Vista just fainted.
Pretty cool fight, all things considered. If you like watching Endbrigner sized mechs with weapons to match brawl it out.
►Robinonboardwalk (Unverified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
@All_I_Survey
Apeiron v Kataclysm when?
►Sapphic4Sapphires (Cape Wife)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Apeiron/Kataclysm when?
►Robinonboardwalk (Unverified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
NO! NO SEXING FAMILY! APEIRON! KATACLYSM! BE BETTER THAN YOUR FATHERS/AUNTS/UNCLES/GRANDPARENTS!
►HeliumKnife
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Isn't it against the unwritten rules to tell us that Ape Iron and Cat Astrophe are from Alabama?
►Robinonboardwalk (Unverified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Who said they were from Alabama?
►HeliumKnife
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
How else are we supposed to interpret that fathers/aunts/grandparents bit?
►Robinonboardwalk (Unverified Cape)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
They're Greek.
►Wharf_Worker
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
Okay moving on before we derail this thread.
Right back on topic, rules! Yes RULES! Let's discuss them!
►Judge (Moderator)
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
You are all derailing. Stop this at once. Move it to the Shipping, if you want to.
►unmitigatedDreamer
Replied On Apr 21st 2011:
There are some heavy implications in a lot of these rules but I think the important one I want to ask about is what kind of extreme sports did y'all try to play in lava before the fun ended?
■
Survey closed her laptop. Pleased with the results of her work. There was not much sensitive data in the post, and it seemed like the citizens liked it.
There was no way this could result in something bad happening. Not like Fleet and his damnable Road.
Right?
ExploerTM
Ruin has found you at last!
- Location
- Russia, Perm
- Pronouns
- He/Him/His
Oh god no, I just realized. With Joe's connections which came with Prismatic Laboratory Joe can organize literal Hell Kitchen
- Location
- Philippines
Joe could probably just create something that fixes that issue. A Key Crest, for example, would neatly solve any energy overload problem that could happen (not that I think it would be likely, as Dauntless was a special case since his power specifically functions that way), and Joe could also just fix a broken connection as well using Arcane Craft. It's not nearly as much of a dealbreaker as you might think.
BarbaCoPut
Voluta indomita
- Location
- Argentina
- Pronouns
- He/His
Greatest Typo or intentional diss? xD Considering what she did to Felyne...
Slice of Life is king, don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
I felt the pain through the screen here...
Hilarious, but... wasn't a bit too "sexual"? at least the rules part?
Was it Survey trolling, meaning it's intended to be weird, or what?
Last edited:
Bailey Matutine
(Verified Pooka)
- Location
- Pelican Town
- Pronouns
- They/Them
You'll never take me alive, coppers!
Crake
I AM THE STORM THAT IS APPROACHING
- Location
- USA
Y'all might be downplaying Joe's possible aspirations in terms of what he'll do after he Unfucks Earth Bet, and possibly goes on to Unfuck significant volumes of the local Multiversal cluster of Earths.
I'm thinking somewhere in the neighborhood of "benevolent creator deity" and professional talk show guest / guest lecturer.
I'm thinking somewhere in the neighborhood of "benevolent creator deity" and professional talk show guest / guest lecturer.
Things Apeiron's Kitchen will not be Involved With Anymore! (dragon_cloud16)
Well as stated due to what I was suppose to be doing falling through due to no shows. It's time for...
25. Just because the lab-which-shall-not-be-named included flavor additives in addition to food safe versions of the cognito hazard dyes does not mean I will include them in my cooking.
26. In light of rising obesity rates in Brockton Bay, Sunshine flavored cotton candy, Joy flavored lollipops, Hug flavored hot chocolate, and Raging chilli will no longer be made in my kitchen.
27. Due to the needs in hospitals though, I will increase the production of Tranquility Tea and Calmness Coffee. These will be sent to all of the medical centers and first responders.
28. In conclusion of the testing conducted, the special form of Italian, French, and Japanese cuisine will not be released to the public. Primarily thanks to the effects that have caused situations that are inproper to be viewed by the public or families.
Things Apeiron's Kitchen will not be Involved With Anymore!
- I did not give Scion an Everlasting Gobstopper, and it did not make him cry tears of joy. (Thanks Torn2.0 for starting the list off!)
- Everlasting Gobstoppers don't generate matter ex nihilo, and I cannot make them.
- Please stop swimming in the chocolate river in the lab. Especially if you decide to go out on patrol afterwards Survey. Just don't.
- I do not use the tears of Tinkers for seasoning at all. Even if all I have to do is show up with some Tech that they specialize in that out does theirs.
- Nor do I use parts of Endbringers in my cooking. Even if the Simurgh is missing a few wings after we had buffalo wings while watching the Super Bowl.
- There are no genetically engineered cows that have the perfect marbling for steaks in the Celestial Forge. They just show up that way now a days.
- I am not the new Willy Wonka even if I can make soda's that grant temperary super powers such as flight or speed enhancements. Or the best chocolate in the world in the words of Lethe.
- Yes, my homemade marshmallows are incredibly soft and fluffy. That does not mean you can use them as pillows for sleeping or rescues. Even if they work better then what is out there.
- Who is it that keeps taking my sandwiches? All they are is a simple snack after all. If you are hungry there are pre-made meals available that just need to be heated up.
- WHO STOLE ALL OF THE PRE-MADE MEALS!?!?! Those were meant to be used after a Endbringer attack or similar S-Class event.
- Just because I have the ability to does not mean I am going to enter Iron Chef. Parahumans are not allowed to do so after all.
- Do to complaints from the rest of the Celestial Forge, I will now being doing a Youtube series on cooking during my free time.
- Lethe, why did I find you and Dinah Alcott laying in a pool filled with all of my homemade Ice Cream?
- Someone please explain to me why there is a small gang standing outside Garment's Business trying to buy meals from me?
- Due to outstanding request I will now offer meals for sale. I will only have a select amount available but they will include beverages, side dishes, entree, and dessert.
- Accord is only allowed to buy two such meals at a time from now own due to potential lawsuit that Survey is reviewing against us.
- The Protectorate is also only allowed to buy two such meals in total. As is the Parahuman Response Teams.
- From now on, everyone can only buy two such meals in a single day. There is no more need for armed violence as well for a chance to purchase such a meal.
- I will not open a restaurant at this time at all due to the need for my cooking. It is a problem when even the Archer Bridge Merchants are looking at the public strangely even if the product being sold has been proven not to be addictive or have Master abilities.
- You cannot use my sushi plate as means to catch the Butcher. You do not now if anyone else would trigger it as well. Such as Leviathan.
- I will be placing a bottle of Whiskey, Red Wine, Tequila, and a keg of Beer up on auction shortly to support the medical charities in the world. I will admit to using the full might of my capabilities when making them drinks and bottles. But please be reasonable.
- THEY SOLD FOR HOW MUCH EACH!!!?!
- From now own, the Celstial Forge will allow one member to choose what is being served each week at random. The people allowed in this are Survey, Fleet, Matrix, Lethe, and Kataklyzm. That means no to Dinah Alcott, Dragon, March, Damsel of Distress, Sundancer, Bakuda, Lady Khepri, or the Endbringers at all.
- Do to sudden demand, I will cook a meal for each Endbringer and will finally allow the Simurgh a chance to enjoy such a meal made by my hands. This has fully proven to be a way to stop their attacks and is a enjoyable way to end them as well.
- The Simurgh is not a possible love interest after the reaction to enjoying my cooking. So get out of the kitchen, put on proper clothes, and return the apron. No member of this team is or was expecting to see the Simurgh in a naked apron in their while holding a wedding ring out for me.
25. Just because the lab-which-shall-not-be-named included flavor additives in addition to food safe versions of the cognito hazard dyes does not mean I will include them in my cooking.
26. In light of rising obesity rates in Brockton Bay, Sunshine flavored cotton candy, Joy flavored lollipops, Hug flavored hot chocolate, and Raging chilli will no longer be made in my kitchen.
27. Due to the needs in hospitals though, I will increase the production of Tranquility Tea and Calmness Coffee. These will be sent to all of the medical centers and first responders.
28. In conclusion of the testing conducted, the special form of Italian, French, and Japanese cuisine will not be released to the public. Primarily thanks to the effects that have caused situations that are inproper to be viewed by the public or families.
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He will probably try to find the source of his perks back to other universes and other series!!!
- Pronouns
- She/They
Who is rated Master/Stranger 3.
Nothing that's not part of another rating (Fog, for example is apparently Changer 8 with some subratings in both Shaker and Stranger, but we don't know how high the subratings are).
I'm not sure that's not an issue with time stop victims so much as broken Triggers, since iirc there was a cape in there beyond Dauntless and Alabaster (who immediately got eaten by Dauntless' Shard) who survived the opening of the time bubble (long enough to get kidnapped and used as a battery by March, but Jotun survived the opening of the time stop), and there's also some Gray Boy victims which I believe were set free during Ward (don't quote me on that, I haven't actually read Ward).
ExploerTM
Ruin has found you at last!
- Location
- Russia, Perm
- Pronouns
- He/Him/His
Just imagine how Joe-Armsy or Joe-Striker Witch would react when Apeiron just pops into existence near them.
Damnit, must resist writing omakes
I wonder how Fleet from Cleveland feels about Fleet taking his moniker? Is he upset? Understanding? Is Fleet from Cleveland part of a team with very generically named Parahumans? Is Fleet from Cleveland a villain? Hero? Dare I suggest it, a Rogue?
Hell, which Cleveland is Fleet from Cleveland from?
Hell, which Cleveland is Fleet from Cleveland from?
- Location
- Philippines
If revival via time travel works though, it does come with a benefit of being lossless. The Shard Network can store the souls of parahumans, but it's not a perfect methodology hence why revived capes tend to be not exactly like how they were when alive in canon. I imagine that Joe could probably fix most of that via restoring the soul to the best of his ability before reviving them, but that kind of thing will probably still leave its mark.
Bailey Matutine
(Verified Pooka)
- Location
- Pelican Town
- Pronouns
- They/Them
Cleveland isn't real. Supposedly it's in Ohio, but I ask you, if it were a real city, would it actually be in Ohio?
What about the Cleveland in Tasmania, Alabama, or North Dakota?
Bailey Matutine
(Verified Pooka)
- Location
- Pelican Town
- Pronouns
- They/Them
The one in Tasmania might exist.
@dragon_cloud16 Thanks for the shout out. Also
25. Just because the lab-which-shall-not-be-named included flavor additives in addition to food safe versions of the cognito hazard dyes does not mean I will include them in my cooking.
26. In light of rising obesity rates in Brockton Bay, Sunshine flavored cotton candy, Joy flavored lollipops, Hug flavored hot chocolate, and Raging chilli will no longer be made in my kitchen.
25. Just because the lab-which-shall-not-be-named included flavor additives in addition to food safe versions of the cognito hazard dyes does not mean I will include them in my cooking.
26. In light of rising obesity rates in Brockton Bay, Sunshine flavored cotton candy, Joy flavored lollipops, Hug flavored hot chocolate, and Raging chilli will no longer be made in my kitchen.
- Pronouns
- Your/His/Mightiness
As far as we know, the Bonesaw resurrected the slaughterhouse 9000. But, except for the gray boy, the rest of the participants were random people who were connected to the same forces, bringing into their heads (using Toybox technology) the memories of former participants. This resulted in the same triggers and powers.
This means that such a resurrection method will not work if we want to resurrect a Hero.
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- Location
- Somewhere in The Woods
Station VIII cuisine time! Now all we need is an Infernally Well-Cut Suit and a Devilish Fedora to complete the scene!
I think the real problem with time travel, especially time travel resurrection, is going to be the work Joe would need to put into hiding from every shard observing the planet when you have to arrive naked. Also remember that this is T1 rules so time travel only works in one direction, so he needs to hide until he's caught up with the present.
would it even be possible for him to arrive naked, what with his dimensional pockets and the fact that he's fiat-backed to always have the key to his pocket dimension?
That and all he needs is to stay in something like a flesh bag and burst out of it like some demented Bio-Tinker monster.