Yes, that.
We had options to use black magic crop up. (Although I only remember the big-deal-memorable-event one at the end of Drakenhof. ... Man, honestly, that time is fuzzier in my memory, by now. There were more times we were given options to use it? I don't recall.) But it also seems reasonable to me, to conclude that our information-presented-to-us thingy, may also have been... massaged a bit, too.
Frankly I think that that quote by Mathilde that people use to talk about her pride and how its her pride talking... I think it's not fully accurate to attribute that to just pride. I think... it's a good idea to take a look at the sort of place she was in -- emotionally -- at the time. What sort of situation was she in? What kind of day was she having?
And the answer to that is 'Some of the worst days of her life.'
That wasn't just pride speaking. That was spite. That was hatefulness. Bitterness. Grief. Anger.
That wasn't a pure window into Mathilde's pride there, from which people can go 'Ahhhh... so she views black magic with a sort of professional disdain, yes? There's a hint there of how if she were the one doing it, she'd do it well.' (Though I do believe that, in the hypothetical scenario where Mathilde took up using black magic, that the narration probably would express that. It's just that I think that it would not be the most 'natural' -- i.e. 'unstressed and not being influenced by grief or Sylvania's atmosphere' -- inclination and thoughts. So. Mathilde would probably think like that. But it would partly be because she/we were choosing to go and use black magic. Yeah. Setting off on that path, will have you justify it to yourself -- no surprise, huh?) It was also Mathilde having an awful time. Mathilde losing her friend in Markus and all of the Greatswords. Mathilde going so far as to blame and hold as responsible, Markus and Jovi Sunscryer for what happened! Like. Even to this day, I think she feels some contempt and blame for Sunscryer dying like he did.
