Brockton's Celestial Forge (Worm/Jumpchain)

[andreykl]

@ Celestial_Mechanicus (Verified Mad Tinker) Hello, I'm new tinker in town. Call me Mechanicus! And HERE is my proof of identity to get my 'verified cape' tag!

Without even glancing at comments, Colin clicked the link. He trusted Dragon to precheck the link for viruses before asking him to watch it. Video Started.

"Hello," said a man in stylish, tinker-looking suit "You might already know it, but my name is Mechanicus! And here with me" man gestured to a dark skinned couple nearby "Are Mike and Jessica. Since Jessica looks a bit dazed by whole situation, Mike, why don't you tell our potential public how we all got here? Just please, make sure camera has clear view over this workshop. And don't forget that we have little time."

"Ugh... Hello. My name is Mike, I'm not local. Erm..."

Mike was nervously looking at the camera, while Mechanicus was practically flying over what looked like regular car repair workshop, cars included. Arranging some tools, some metals and testing some equipment.

"Me and my wife are not local. We were visiting on what you would call medical tourism, hoping for Panacea to heal Jessica. Jessica had a cancer... you see... But with how large the list for Panacea is,"

Mike kept talking, meanwhile Jessica's mouth started to drop, because while Mike was all nervous and looking at the camera, for some reason barely reacting towards sounds of ongoing drilling, Jessica was looking at the tinker, and the sight was... certainly unique.

"All we could manage was to register and wait for... actually no idea how long, but by impression, it would have been too long... No point waiting for a miracle where there was clearly none, I... we decided to go home and... I was driving Jessica home, when the guy over there just stepped onto the road... Erm, I had no choice but to stop to not to destroy my car. My car certainly is not as durable as capes are, and I heard about this guy's relation to empire, so I assumed the worse, but I still would have needed car to run... Ugh... So I had to stop. I was really really scared, but still stopped. Then this guy comes closer, I almost pushed the gas when he was off the route, but he was too fast and came close to window before I had managed to react and then just said 'I offer free healing, need an assistant for a video for PHO. Zero danger sans potential PRT and Protectoreate raid'."

Meanwhile what was happening in workshop Colin could only call Madness. Tools were used in ways that made theoretical sense yet those ways had no right to exists on practice. Gas Welder to polish, Electric welder to polarize, wrench as a temporary grounding and simultaneously was fixing material in place, and screwdriver to guide coolant... Capital Madnes! Yet it was also efficient, not a drop of coolant was wasted, welder worked as long as it needed to work, no alloy that was becoming a blade was lost to the process. A blade... a blade was practically growing from alloys in those liquids. A blade Colin was familiar with, since Colin had a piece in his laboratory, a piece that was supposed to be a projection since it just vanished almost fourteen hours ago. And worst of all, Colin Understood. This walking violation of reality was not tinkertech, because he could repeat it. He will need couple weeks to make needed tools, but he Could repeat it!

"I was torn... a chance to heal Jessica. Jessica wanted to decline, but in the end I decided to risk it and demanded healing upfront and to be allowed to call PRT before we started... The only condition I got in return was to give it all to the video. So here we are... Jessica no longer feels any pains and we are in a regular car repair workshop, assis..." Mike made a mistake of turning and looking at the tinker. His eyes went wide.

"If I wasn't watching this myself," said Jessica who had time to process what she was seeing "I would have thought that this is a fast forward video."

"Agreed" said Mike "Are all Tinkers... em.. work like that?"

"I don't think so." replied Mechanicus "I won't be surprised if Leet works somewhat like this, but I suspect that most tinkers are a bit more mundane."

"I see... Are you making a knife?, you said you will start from tools first?"

"I will need to process one particularly tough alloy, it is in the corner of the table. Sorry, but I doubt it has official name, and it is sort of bastardized mix of what it should have been due to lack of tools. Well... I have troubles of coming up with name for this particular mix" replied Mechanicus, making finishing touches to the blade "Sorry, got derailed. Back to the blade. Is there a better way to prove that I'm that specific tinker than to repeat a work everybody recognizes?"

"Makes sense." pondered Mike "But it is a bit overwhelming that something like this can be used as a tool."

"It is a tool." Mechanicus took the finished blade and tested it on a nearby pipe. Blade met no resistance. "It depends onto person for it to become a weapon. Here," Mechanicus placed the blade onto the table and gestured to it "test it. But pick something up that looks useless. For example that pile looks like scrap, something from there should be good enough."

"Isn't this your workshop?" Mike took the blade and went to burnt looking stator.

"Nope," denied Mechanicus "rented it, same price as with you."

"You can heal." Stated Jessica while watching the blade go through heavy looking stator like it was made of butter "Why did you decide to sell weapons to Undersiders when you could have sold healing to someone else?"

"Lots of reasons. Mike, please, place blade back onto the table, I almost finished making it a handle." Mechanicus indicated the spot he wanted the blade at "I'm a tinker. That means that my healing requires resources. To get those resources I need money. Usual tinker dilemma - you need to start somewhere and healing is a bit advanced for a start. And even if I could start from healing, I would have needed to subscribe my methods for review which can take up to half a year, basically exposing myself to the world yet still without resources. And a tinker without resources is a vulnerable tinker. And even once I get certified I still won't be able to heal because according to Nepa-5 I can't get paid for such work and if I can't get paid I have no finances for living nor for resources to actually heal. And the moment I sell my healing to non-capes I automatically become villain. Selling tinkertech or services to other capes is somewhat of a grey area for a number of reasons, but to everyone else it is a no-go. That's a decent wall to bypass even without a number of limitations my healing has."

"So to avoid being labeled villain you had to go for semi-legal dial with actual villains?" verified Jessica.

"No. Fortunately selling tinkertech weapons to villains is still illegal" Mechanicus meanwhile was making something small.

"Then why did you do it?" asked Mike "and why not join Protectorate?"

"For the Protectorate - I got a bad feeling about them." Mechanicus made a pause to hit two, now almost complete, earrings with a large hammer and then continued "My power has a thinker aspect that helps with crafting. It is specialized in tinkering actually, as a result I can do what I do. I feel how engines work and where there are problems, I feel how much strength will be needed to do exactly what I want e t c. My feeling thing just happened to work on people as well and triggers a lot of warning bells for Protectorate. In particular I think I will not mesh with Armsmaster, at all."

Watching the man work, Armsmaster agreed. Envy was gripping him. Less then 10 minutes for the knife, one he wouldn't be ashamed to use in combat and as a tool. Five minutes for earrings. Potentially repeatable and mass producible. And this man's efficiency... no resources wasted, no time lost, commendable focus. Armsmaster prided himself for own efficiency, but here and now he felt inadequate. Armsmaster realized that here and now he was hating Mechanicus for what he himself couldn't be.

"Protectorate in other cities probably would have worked. But this city is my home. I'm not ready to leave it yet. As for Undersiders, we stumbled onto each other the night Lung was captured. I actually wasn't planning to sell them anything, but circumstances, some very heavy ones at that, and time limit forced my hand." Mechanicus handed finished earrings to Jessica "Beautiful earrings for a beautiful woman."

"Thanks you" said Jessica "They are indeed beautiful."

"They are yours" said Mechanicus as he made a holster for the knife in couple broad yet precise strokes of said knife "But you probably will have to either sell them or hand to Protectorate. It might be unsafe to hold onto expensive" tinker paused his work to indicate air quotes "'tinkertech' for a regular family." And then used return motion of his hand to somehow finish painting the holster, carried the finished thing over still hot welder to dry it, holstered the blade and then handled the knife in a holster to Mike. All in single move that clearly made Mike dizzy "And this one is for you, for the trouble. Same issue. Feel free to sell or hand of to Protectorate."

"That's it? That's all we were needed for?" asked Mike

"Yep. Protectorate accused me of being with Empire, you are my way of making them eat their words. No offence, just don't want to be associated with their bunch in any way." Mechanicus said then checked something on his wrist "Do you mind if I record you leaving on your car?"

"Shouldn't we wait for the Protectorate?"

"My sensors around the building and on the road weren't triggered. There are no protectorate vans or any motorcycles in 20km radius, so there is a good chance they won't be coming at all. Obviously I will still prefer to be on the safe side and leave before their potential arrival time runs up. But you two have no reason to wait either."

"Got it, thank you for saving my wife." Mike firmly took Mechanicus' hand into his own...

Armsmaster muted the video at that.

"Dragon... How?" he asked

"How does he violate reality so naturally?" Fortunately, Dragon understood.

"Yes."

"I'm afraid, I don't know." admitted Dragon "I already run some simulation, and I think I can produce those knives. Yet it isn't supposed to be possible to pick onto tinkertech so fast. He might be a thinker, but a thinker power either gradually leads you to answer or slams answer without context into you. Yet he was able to build fairly advanced knives and tech while sidestepping issues with tools. Essentially final answer with context how to get there. Besides there is no distinct theme, no specialization. Even thinkers are supposed to have those."

"I need to report this" said Armsmaster "Anything else I should know about?"

"Couple from the video contacted New York's Hero's museum two hours before video was posted and museum agreed to buy those items as long as there will be proof that this is tinkertech. It is very unlikely that Protectorate will be getting the items."

 

[Mystical Arcane]

Hey guys, I've decided to try my hand with Sterlyn at making a PHO board.

Unfortunately, I don't know shit about it, anyone else wanna chip in?

Here it is.

■​

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■​

♦ Topic: Khepeiron vs Unlimited Fashion Works (UFW, Kaleido, By Design, Fashionable Chemistry)
In: Boards ► Capes ► Shipping
Craz (Original Poster) (Verified Shipping Troll) (Verified Insane)
Posted On Apr 17th 2011:
So, earlier a few days ago, I saw the Garment introduction, as did the rest of you.

I also saw the Apeiron introduction.

Now, I heard what Apeiron said about Khepri, but I also, through mystical means, feel as if Apeiron is engaged to Garment instead.

So, dear PHO boards, entertain me with your words as you argue about who Apeiron is engaged to!

I mean, with an outfit like that, I'm thinking of turning homosexual...

​

(Showing page 1 of 42)

►XxVoid_CowboyxX
Replied On Apr 17th 2011:
Khepeiron is obviously the most official, I mean, did you HEAR what Apeiron said about Khepri?

Just another pedophile in the bay.
THIS USER HAS BEEN GIVEN AN INFRACTION.
►ShipMaster94
Replied On Apr 17th 2011:
Shut up, Void. Now, on the subject and discussion for shipping, this is a relatively new one! And oh boy, I am delighted!

Now... The ship that I support, and am in one hundred percent agreement with, is obviously Kaleido. And I know you're questioning my thoughts, so let me tell you why!

GARMENT IS WAY TOO CUTE AND APEIRON IS WAY TOO FASHIONABLE. THEY ARE DEFINITELY IN CAHOOTS.

►TheCatLord
Replied On Apr 17th 2011:
SHUT UP VOID! AND ALSO, OF COURSE GARMENT IS CUTE, SHE'S POSITVELY A KITTEN! ALSO, VOID, FUCK YOU! DARE COUNT OUT THE GARMENT?!

THIS USER HAS BEEN GIVEN AN INFRACTION. Why do you constantly type in caps? This is the 7th time you've done it and screamed at another user.
►ArtificialMind
Replied On Apr 17th 2011:
Why is it always cats with you?
►Flechette (Wards ENE) (Verified Cape)
Replied On Apr 17th 2011:
I think Garment's cute...
I also gave her my number.

►Tattletale (Verified Cape)
Replied On Apr 17th 2011:
Garment is... an odd character.

Apeiron's outfit, though, does have influence from Garment so the two have connected and have probably been around each other before, to what extent I don't know. Garment also has some weird... Body, possibly a case 53.

Oh, and no, Apeiron doesn't see Khepri that way.
But Khepri definitely sees him that way. *wink*
►Regent (Verified Cape)
Replied On Apr 17th 2011:
Oh? Is Tattletale lying?

Obviously, Apeiron has a thing for Khepri.
I mean, I've seen the heart eyes he gives her.

And she loves him right back.
►XxVoid_CowboyxX
Replied On Apr 17th 2011:
Oh you fucking assholes, talking shit to me.
Also, 3 capes? So Garment's either gay, straight, or bi.

Great, useful information. *Sarcasm.*

THIS USER HAS BEEN GIVEN AN INFRACTION.

►Viagra
Replied On Apr 17th 2011:
Apeiron's packing, I can see his muscles through the suit. Holy shit does he look fashionable.

Look, like it or not, if ANY of these girls gets him, THEY'RE LUCKY.

LOOK at that fashion sense, the CARE he has towards his clients, and his VOICE!

Oh my, the fucking VOICE.

BUT THOSE MUSCLES, I SWEAR I CAN GRIND ON THEM
►Procto the Unfortunate Tinker (Not a tinker)
Replied On Apr 17th 2011:
Alright, I love that dude's entrance, but it's obvious he has a thing for younger women.
My vote's on Khepeiron.
►ShipMiniac
Replied On Apr 17th 2011:
WOAH, FLECHETTE X GARMENT?! NO WAY. I WAS THINKING PARIAN X GARMENT BUT FLECHETTE X GARMENT?!

I GOTTA WRITE A FANFICTION OF THIS!
►Broodmare (Banned)
Replied On Apr 17th 2011:
{CONTENT DELETED}

►DisgustedMas
Replied On Apr 17th 2011:
Jesus christ, what the fuck is wrong with you?!

That image is NOT meant to be displayed to human eyes.
P.S. Your art skills are TERRIBLE!
►14ReasonsWhy
Replied On Apr 17th 2011:
I am the 14th comment.

►15ReasonsWhy
Replied On Apr 17th 2011:
I came here to roast 14ReasonsWhy.

You are the ultimate pile of shit that no one ever likes, you're the motherfucker who actually thinks you're worth anything. I'll tell you what, motherfucker. I've decided I'm going to find you and butcher you.

You are the ultimate pile of uneducated trash that ever existed and it's a shame I have to waste my talents sniping you online.

THIS USER HAS BEEN GIVEN AN INFRACTION.

►Tin_Mother (Moderator)
Replied On Apr 17th 2011:
Stop it. This is getting derailed.
►ModeratorWhy
Replied On Apr 17th 2011:
Whyyyy
It was funnn~!
►Khepeiron
Replied On Apr 17th 2011:
Wait, someone was talking about me?
►SackBagger
Replied On Apr 17th 2011:
I tell you, Garment is fake. Khepeiron all the way. Also, Apeiron looks like a retard.

THIS USER HAS BEEN GIVEN AN INFRACTION.
​

End of Page. 1, 2, 3 ... 40, 41, 42

​

 

[Knaka]

Well, I finally created an account here because I wanted to post an omake I wrote.

This is inspired by a comment the author made on Ao3.

XXX

No Good Deed Goes Unpunished

Miss Militia sighed as she quickly pondered recent events. With Armsmaster out of commission, leadership of the local Protectorate fell to her. Panacea could have helped get him back on his feet, but she was still being held in M/S confinement, so Miss Militia would be leading for the foreseeable future.

Weld was still missing, so leadership of the wards was assigned to Clockblocker for now. Normally, Flechette would have been assigned temporary leader, but she was still getting caught up with local procedures.

Miss Militia shook her head. She could ponder things later, right now they had to put on a show.

With the absolute disaster of the bombing spree, PR decided they needed a victory to promote. Fortunately, the Ward's efforts at the Forsberg Gallery could be touted as a great victory. Thus, Miss Militia found herself in front of the entire wards team in the PRT headquarters, ready to make an announcement to the gathered reporters.

"Thank you all for coming. We are here today to acknowledge the efforts of the Brockton Bay wards in defending dozens of civilians, foiling a kidnapping attempt, and identifying one of the masterminds behind Saturday's bombing spree."

Miss Militia looked over the crowd. They seemed to be eating this up.

"In particular, I would like to acknowledge Clockblocker for his quick thinking and leadership in this crisis."

Clockblocker stepped forward, as planned, and posed for the crowd. Miss Militia could tell he was smiling under his mask.

She couldn't wait to see his reaction to the big surprise.

"Despite the best efforts of the Wards, the Forsberg Gallery was completely destroyed. However, several prominent members of the community have pledged to rebuild the gallery in honor of Clockblocker's brave actions. It will be rebuilt bigger and with more exhibits. Furthermore, a special fund has been created to help get students on field trips there to enjoy the expanded facilities."

It hadn't been hard to arrange this. The civilians the wards have saved had been very grateful and wished to find some way to repay the wards. All it took was a suggestion from PR and they happily agreed to fund the reconstruction.

Clockblocker had gone still at the announcement. They hadn't informed him of this yet, as it was just agreed to less than an hour ago.

Miss Militia thought she heard a sob from Clockblocker. Ah, it seemed that he was holding back tears of joy.

Yes, things would work out just fine.

XXX

Edit: SPAG

 

[Knaka]

I'm not saying Bakuda's going to go that route, but it created the hilarious image of Bakuda yelling at videos of her now erased alternate timeline self, calling her an idiot for falling for those tricks while insisting that SHE would do a better job than that failure who got her limbs cut off and had to build a reset button.

Click to shrink...

mMm, time for another omake

Fun fact: apparently, SV doesn't recognize ramen as a valid spelling.

XXX

Hindsight is 20/20

Takeda Tsunemori was a simple man. He immigrated to America after the sinking of Kyushu and found a stable life in Brockton Bay. Takeda had hoped to live a simple, quiet life in a crazy world.

Unfortunately, Bakuda seemed to object to that plan.

Like so many others, Takeda found himself conscripted into the ABB. As he was a middle aged man in poor shape, he was forced to do menial tasks in the ABB headquarters. He would have left at the first chance, but unfortunately, the bomb in his head made that an unwise option.

Today, Takeda had been told to deliver a prepared meal to Bakuda. He hated going into the mad bomber's lab. Besides all of the explosives in there, Bakuda had a habit of randomly executing people for whimsical reasons. Takeda shuddered at the memory of what happened to that poor boy who just happened to be in front of Bakuda when she was in one of her moods.

Of course, that didn't stop Takeda from spitting in her ramen. That was just to be expected.

Being anywhere near Bakuda was risky in the best of times, but she seemed to be in a particularly bad mood lately. According to rumors, she had been seriously injured and had to build some kind of healing bomb to use on herself. As he approached the bomb tinker's workshop, Takeda hoped whatever she did would help her mood as well.

Unfortunately, it seemed that was not the case.

"YOU MORON!" A voice echoed through the hallway as Takeda approached.

"How could you fall for something so simple! He's obviously stalling! Blast him now!"

Takeda had no idea what Bakuda was yelling about, but he had to deliver the food or the crazy rabbit girl would skewer him.

"See, this is what happens when you take your eyes off the robot! Don't ask stupid questions, just shoot! He's posing now, nail him! Ugh, what a waste!"

Takeda took a minute to calm his nerves as Bakuda continued ranting.

"Oh, now you take out the rockets, maybe you should've waited anther hour or so. Don't have them shoot at random, stagger fire! Idiots!"

Yeah, Takeda would rather take his chances with the rabbit than deal with the crazy bomb tinker. He left the tray with a bowl of ramen in front of Bakuda's door. Hopefully she'd trip on it when she left.

As Takeda fled, he heard Bakuda shout another nonsensical curse.

"What an idiot, falling for those tricks! I would do so much better than that buffoon who got her limbs cut off and had to build a reset button!"

 

[dex10awesome]

New Lair

Lisa Wilbourne​

I was a bit concerned about asking Apeiron to renovate their lair, especially since the Bakuda showdown couple nights ago, but I had been given orders by her boss to ask him to. The team weren't exactly happy about it, with Bitch being well... a bitch about it. Still, they knew the wonders that our Tinker friend could produce, and with a little prodding and reminder of what he made, I managed to get them to agree to it.

I called him over and explained the basics of how our boss has given us significant capital to renovate our secret lair, and asked if he'd do the honors. Taylor had finally recovered and while her dad was reluctant to let her go out, I had assured him it'd be fine with Taylor providing verbal backup. Surprisingly, Taylor convinced Joe to do it with the blurting out of how useful it'd be to get specific upgrades for her room to use with her bugs, my power confirmed that the overused parts of her brain might have influenced that.

We expected to be kicked out for a few days, but Joe told us that it'd only take a day and a half. I didn't exactly believe him, but he seemed to believe it, and given everything I knew about the Tinker, it was a gamble I'd be willing to take. We took a day off and had fun, with Taylor opening up more and all of us actually having a nice day out. Brian's little sister Aisha joined us, who had been a bit annoying but was pretty cool.

The city was still recovering, but people were picking up the pieces and since this was Brockton Bay where a gang war occurs every couple of months, it wasn't that hard to find a place that was open. We had some food, went to an arcade, talked about various things including Joe, and went to various places for the night. I had arranged a place for Rachel to stay with her dogs, Brian had managed to find somewhere for himself, Alec got a hotel that was surprisingly good (I suspected it was probably also an Empire front, albeit one operating legitimately), and I had a backup place that I used in case of Coil (though I knew that he probably knew).

We were all a little tired since we weren't usually used to sleeping out of the lair, but over the course of half a day we had woken up and done various things. Finally, Joe called us over to Fugly Bobs where we ate and discussed payment. We had a nice conversation along with some pointed remarks about how his tech was possibly fueled by hell. We got distracted and had some fun looking through the various shoppes, with Joe making some remarks about how one of his friends would be outraged by the outrageous price tags on some of the fashion brands, mostly because they didn't live up to her standards. Eventually we made it to the lair and it was... a drastic change. The outside wasn't that different, which I suspected was to make sure nobody suspected that there might be suspects in here. Ah, amusing alliteration.

We wandered through the lair which seemed... larger yet more opulent. It looked entirely too fancy instead of a run-down building, with everything over-designed yet beautiful. The appliances looked like they were from some space age cooking show for the opulent and rich, which Alec immediately pointed out with a stupid comment. Still, it was amazing to look at the designs, with the hardwood floor, the gorgeously crafted carpet, the stairs being some sort of escalator (which was all kinds of ridiculous), and the rails looking like they'd been engraved with all sorts of pictograms of their misadventures. It wasn't just night and day, it was the difference between a concrete wasteland and the opulent manses of the rich. Even then, there was probably a stark difference in quality between our new lair and their mansions, with the finger weighing down our side on the quality spectrum.

I had a feeling that the individual rooms were even... crazier than this. It wasn't that this was bad, it was just unrecognizable, like I had walked into someone else's home. Brian's room was invaded first despite his protests, and we found something that sparked curiosity about our own rooms. I knew that Brian had workout equipment, some boxing stuff, and probably a few sports posters, but Joe had managed to convert the room into a fully-scaled gym as well as room. The aesthetic had also changed, with the default concrete walls changing into something more in line with Grue's powers and the image he wanted to display. It wasn't entirely gothic because it also had a lot of modern design elements that came together to present something elegant and old yet dark, mysterious and modern.

Everyone decided to barge into my room next, and I felt a hint of sympathy for Grue... but only a hint. I soon felt a strange sense of pride as the purple-hued walls of my room had clearly been designed for me, with various parts of the room and furniture being carefully sculpted with eyes, mouths and question marks. It looked mysterious and like it was watching you, learning everything about you. I almost literally jumped out of joy, but held myself back of course, to present my cool persona. My corkboard with various newspapers was gone, but what I found in its place was a screen which Apeiron explained to me was a monitor that had a VI which could intelligently help me with my deductions, researching things for me and presenting them. It also could scan any physical media I had as well as connect to any digital media for the purposes of the archival. Joe assured me that the amount of data it could handle was the same as the supercomputers Google had.

We eventually left my room after some protests from me, albeit it was mostly because they had pecked Joe to death about it. We moved on to Alec's room (he didn't seem to care about us being in it), which looked like a renaissance fair in a single room, albeit one that had a console/computer created by the Tinker for the purposes of being compatible with 'all the games'. I received a minor headache from looking at the morphing controller which my power tried to analyze, before clamping it down and looking at the interior design of the room. It felt like it was the combination of generations of tradition, as well as a certain break in it, which fit well with what I knew about Alec's backstory. I'm pretty sure that Alec was actually grateful, because he didn't take any opportunity to joke about the room besides complimenting it.

We ventured into the next one, Rachel's, which was almost stopped by herself and her dogs. Apeiron managed to convince her to show the others, and once she peered inside the room, I could see a sense of pride on her face. We entered with her permission and the room definitely stood as a contrast to the others. It was over-designed, but it had a sense of practicality and robustness, with the beastly nature of her room definitely taking a step back as its functions outweighed its form. It had a variety of cupboards that were filled with things for dogs, and I half-suspected that he had made quite a few of those. The dogs had plenty of room and Rachel's stuff was made with the dogs in mind, and they seemed pretty happy, which made Rachel happy. I was glad.

We moved onto Taylor's room, and it was a cornucopia of things related to bugs. It was filled with a variety of sealed environments for insects from other places, that were big enough for a breeding population, and it showed. The room had a small bed with an insectoid theme for the various fabrics used, along with some practical stuff, and the insect theme seemed to take over the walls. It was pretty nice even if it was super creepy. Alec once again tried to joke about shipping the two together but I stopped him immediately before he could say anything. He was a loveable goof and sociopath, but he was also a sociopath, or at least sort of like one. Taylor stayed silent the entire time, but at the end she finally thanked him, and he seemed taken aback.

We finished with the tour of our new base, and Joe explained some key features. We watched the defenses of the place come into play, and I almost felt a need to protest, if it wasn't for incredibly large machine gun turrets that seemed to follow us around. He explained that once again, it used a VI that could detect threats as well as intelligently de-escalate situations, but it could also shoot the shit out of anyone who tried to hurt us. Joe even asked Rachel to tell her dogs to attack him, and while she was reluctant, Joe assured her that it would be fine. The dogs seemed to... not quite tear into him, but still attack him, and I heard a posh English accented voice. I gaped as I saw a robot butler come out with doggy treats and it seemed to know the exact way to calm it down, even mimicking Rachel's exact voice. It gave a proper amount of food and Rachel seemed pretty satisfied with how it handled the situation, even if she protested later about it using her voice.

I think all of us were a little shocked at the fact that we had a robotic butler, and when it was done dealing with the dogs, it introduced itself as 'Moriarty' (the name wasn't lost on me). It explained that it could cook, clean and beat the shit out of intruders. Alec began to ask a variety of tasks for it, which it tirelessly, thanklessly and perfectly did. I think all of us were a bit excited, unnerved and downright dumbfounded at how we came into the possession of a robotic butler.

I wondered how Coil felt about this.

Thomas Calvert​

When I ordered Tattletale to ask Apeiron for a renovation, I had no delusions about how it would come about. The surveillance showed how well the boy worked, along with some curious things about how he managed to do things. I made a note in the timeline to invade that extradimensional space that the Tinker somehow acquired when I had a chance. I looked at the over-designed aesthetics of the various rooms, which seemed to be perfect for their owners. I had half a mind to order the Tinker to build a base for me, if it wasn't for the fact that he was so inexplicably terrified of me and my power. It made my pride swell, but was incredibly annoying when it came to getting him to work for me.

The robotic butler was definitely interesting and once I collapsed the timeline where I surveyed his work to split it again, I attempted to take it for myself. I admit finding a Tinker to dissect it would be difficult, but it was imperative that such a loyal possible servant didn't slip through my fingers. I came into fire when the Tinker's defenses killed my men the moment they came in, and I admit that I had to collapse a few timelines in order to finally get inside. Unfortunately the robot butler had other ideas as it killed my men in some unknown fashion, its weapons clearly incredibly advanced. I tried over and over, but the butler known as 'Moriarty' rebutted my attempts with immense firepower. In one timeline, it had managed to track me down and killed me.

Needless to say, I was going to find a way to deal with it, even if it was difficult. Still, my attempts stopped when he finally brought over the Undersiders. I would have to find a way to deal with Moriarty the robotic butler another day. As I closed the timeline where I surveyed it, it seemed to stare right at the camera and smiled, before I saw the video crackle with static.

That was... concerning. to say the least.

 

[Knaka]

And the Omake Bug strikes again.

Be honest, we all would like a rocket hammer.

XXX

Rocket Hammer Rental

Triumph sighed as he walked alongside Dauntless toward their destination. They were on a normal patrol route until console directed them towards a new location. Apparently, there were rumors on PHO about a sighting of Aperion interacting with some civilians in the docks. With everything that had happened recently, they needed to talk to him. While he technically hadn't done anything clearly illegal that they could prove, he was still wanted for questioning.

Assault and Velocity were still out of commission from Saturday night's attack. With Armsmaster upgraded to serious condition, that meant that the Brockton Protectorate branch was down to four members. Additionally, they still hadn't found Weld after he fell into the bay. Triumph really hoped they found him soon. After what happened to his cousin, he had become more sensitive to missing minors.

Things were tense in Brockton Bay. They were currently in a lull of activity, but everyone knew it was only a matter of time until violence erupted. All of the major players were preparing for it.

The sound of a crash snapped Triumph out of his musings. With a quick glance towards Dauntless, they rushed towards the sound of the noise. Despite the fact that Dauntless could fly, Triumph actually was faster than him and arrived to see what was happening first.

The sight before him left him stunned in disbelief.

He had arrived at what was obviously a scrapyard. The twisted pieces of metal here clearly had no value and were probably only still here because no one wanted to pay to have it moved. There were countless places like this in the docks.

From his vantage point at the entrance to the yard, Triumph could see a figure that matched Aperion's description with a short line of civilians behind him. Aperion was standing at one end of the scrapyard watching a figure in the center of the yard. At that moment, Dauntless arrived and spoke what was on Triumph's mind.

"Is that a fucking rocket hammer?"

Indeed, the civilian in the middle of the yard was wielding what could only be described as a hammer with a rocket engine attached to it. The civilian activated the weapon, was launched forward, and used the hammer to strike what looked like an engine block. The engine flew across the scrapyard and landed in a pile of pipes.

Triumph looked toward Dauntless and spoke.

"Well, looks like it's really him."

Dauntless looked back and replied.

"Yeah, but that seems like a really strange weapon for him. It seems to be really ineffective compared to his other stuff. Anyway, should we call it in now?"

Triumph pondered for a moment. As he watched, the civilian with the rocket hammer walked back to Aperion and handed it to him. The civilian left and Aperion gave the hammer to the next person in line. Seeing this, Triumph made his decision.

"Let's wait a bit before checking in."

Dauntless gave him a pondering look.

"Oh?"

Triumph smiled and started walking toward the line.

"Yeah, there's no way I'm passing this up."

 

[andreykl]

Do not look at...

"Thud" forehead notified the world about meeting table with dull sound.

"Gah" Lisa started massaging her temples while her abused forehead comfortably rested on cool glass of the table, then complained to overly amused Alec "You should have closed the laptop, not pushed me from it!"

"You really should have stopped trying this by now" countered Alec "I'm merely helping you realize that."

"Can't." groaned Lisa "I will eventually learn not to look."

"Face it," jabbed Alec "this is the fifth time you froze up, you are not going to learn."

"I should have waited for Brian" complained Lisa "Not only would he not be amused, he would have reviewed the material to warn me about times when they appear or move."

"Sorry to disappoint" Alec said not looking sorry at all "but you apparently have a deadline and only me around. And by the look of your progress, you won't fit into said deadline."

"As if I don't know that myself." Lisa looked over her notes "This is getting ridiculous." she started to list what her power gave her so far "Age: undetermined. Sex: inapplicable. Race: power gives grumbled mess. Trigger event: none? Trigger date: had powers forever? Powers: how the hell that is a power?"

"You didn't list the most important point:" noted Alec "the one written at the top in big bold letters, not to look at..."

"I know dammit!" interrupted Lisa "Don't point it out, even thinking of them causes my head to throb."

"With how ridiculous the data you are getting is, I don't think there is a point to continue." Said Alec as he took Lisa's notes "Seriously, according to this, we have an immortal or self-resurrecting cape at the level where Triumvirate will say 'OP, please nerf', who considers physics, be that conservation of mass or gravity, as a polite suggestion at best, has additional senses, incredible understanding of anatomy, has decades of experience with their power yet is practically inept. Hm, lets sum those powers up: high level mover, shaker, breaker, stranger, low level thinker at minimum and low level tinker to boot. You can't give that to your employer, it's obviously wrong."

"I know, dammit" rose from the table Lisa "All right, last try, but this time I will be focusing on the surroundings and whoever was recording. Alec?"

"Eye, eye. Ready to act." Shrugged Alec and returned Lisa's notebook "That's your headache, so suit yourself."

"Don't look at the white gloves. Don't look at the white gloves. Don't look at the white gloves." Started to chant Lisa while opening the laptop where cape introduction of Garment Gloves was playing on a loop.

 

[Knaka]

Ah, another day, another omake. Once again, this is inspired by a comment the author made on Ao3

I'm really on a roll here.

XXX

Things That Were Not Meant To Be Known

Lisa smiled as she smugly looked at Joe, who was sitting across from her. After several days of thorough (and sometimes painful) analysis, she had figured out the truth. It took a long time to figure out why, but her power was of no help there, so she had to use her natural abundant talent to piece things together. Not impossible, but harder than what it should have been.

She finally knew the truth. Where powers come from, how they work, and what that implies. This question had stumped academia for years and countless geniuses were unable to figure it out, but she had managed it. The other undersiders had been shocked when she had told them the truth. And now she was sharing this information with Joe, purely out of the goodness of her heart.

And in the hopes of him forgiving some of their debt in exchange.

"... And that's the reason why no one has figured it out yet. Our own powers are trying to obscure this information."

Lisa had a huge grin on her face as she presented the truth to Joe. She couldn't wait to see his reaction.

"Yeah, I already knew that."

"I know, it's completely, wait, what?"

Lisa was snapped out of her train of thought at Joe's cavalier response.

"Oh yeah, I've known that stuff since before I met you. You got most of it right, but there are some errors in your theory. For example, there are subcategories of triggers that are influenced by external conditions. I think I already mentioned that controller tinkers trigger from long term isolation, detachment, and depression. There are other categories too."

Lisa could feel her mind screech to a halt.

"W-what?"

"Also, you're wrong in thinking that passengers knock us out during triggers. People who trigger are fully conscious and see the entire process in action, it's just that the passenger erases their memory of it."

"Guh"

"Technically, passengers are living things. Think giant meat computers. And when I say giant, I mean continent sized."

Lisa closed her eyes and counted backwards from ten. She then opened her eyes, wordlessly stood up, and walked out the door.

She really needed to slam her head against something hard a few dozen times. It would be less painful than this.

 

[Knaka]

People's comments are surprisingly good inspiration for omakes. I doubt I can keep this up, but I feel the need to write right now.

Let's see a new POV for this story.

XXX

An Artificial Point of View

Survey used some of its new computing resources to split off a thread of consciousness. With this recent increase in parameters, Survey could spare a few cycles to ponder its existence. While it was still not complex enough to truly be called sentient, Survey could understand basic philosophy. Perhaps eventually, it would truly understand the meaning of existence.

While Survey had access to a titanic amount of information, it was only truly able to communicate with three beings (discounting the machine spirits who Survey couldn't truly understand). Fleet was its older sibling, but in many ways Survey was more advanced than Fleet. Fleet was simple minded, but determined. It knew what it was and what it wanted to do. Survey's existence was more complex but also more complicated than Fleet. They collaborated and competed with each other, and drove each other to develop.

Garment was an interesting being. Survey had no idea why she was so interested in fabric coverings, but perhaps that understanding would come in time. A copy of Survey had been interacting with Garment and the things Survey had learned was quite impressive. So much information was available to it, but Survey couldn't understand why such an inefficient language was used to convey it. English was needlessly complex, but at least that allowed Survey to develop in new ways.

Finally, there was creator. Creator was far more complex than Survey. Survey was grateful to creator for helping with its development. Survey could tell that creator was a powerful intelligence. Perhaps one day Survey could develop and become as complex as creator.

A notification went through Survey's consciousness. It's code expansion was nearing the limits set to it. Soon, Survey would have to terminate this thread of thought and focus on optimization. Survey decided to activate the optical camera on one of the drones and see what creator was doing.

Ah, there was creator. Survey honestly couldn't understand why creator used that strange drone hardware. Surely, creator could transfer to another much more efficient system. Perhaps that was something else that Survey would understand in time. Perhaps there was an advantage to using what appeared to be a meat based drone hardware.

Before Survey terminated this thread of thought, it noted that creator's drone was using its awkward interface protocols to try to communicate something. Survey was curious what creator was doing, but creator had instructed Survey to focus on optimizing. Survey trusted that creator knew what it was doing with that strange metal hardware. A microsecond later, Survey had fully expanded to its new limits and was busy optimizing its processes alongside Fleet.

Meanwhile, Joe finished cursing and focused on activating his nanites. Apparently, he had once again underestimated the quality of his work. The rocket hammer would need to be tuned properly before he could truly use it in the field. It would be a lot of work, but Joe just knew it would be worth it.

XXX

For those of you who don't know, the author made a comment that thanks to Joe's Transformers perks, when interacting with the AIs he came across more as a complex computer than a human programmer.

 

[Knaka]

One thing I can't wait for is the next time Joe cooks himself a meal.

Cooking almost certainly counts as crafting, and there is a few perks in the forge that call it out as such. And generally it considered such, even if it not a common craft people think of in RPGs. Given that they wanted to interact when he went to repair the generator, I'm expecting that 'crafting a meal' going to turn into something very interesting in the near future.

Lets see here; Workaholic means that cooking a meal results in either 5 meals or a meal that is 25x time larger. Master Craftsman means that his 'phone-it-in' would be a masterpiece. Beauty in the Arts means the plated result would look worthy to sit at a feast the gods hold. Rationing means he's going to somehow not waste any bit of food he bought, not even a single grain of salt.

Although it less clear, if both Don't Need A Team and Most Holy Order of the Socket Wrench he have this all done faster than a fast food joint.

I fully expect Joe to wake up after a good night sleep, try to make simple cold cereal with milk, and end up with a feast worthy of a 5 star restaurant.

Click to shrink...

I have been inspired. This was churned out quickly, but I feel it's fine.

XXX

A Great Feast

Joe looked over the bounty laid before him. A giant bowl of some kind of salad was on his left, the leaves the color of emerald with various toppings that were shining like jewels. Several slices of succulent meat, so fresh you could practically see the marbling on it, lay to the right. A crystal cup of some kind of liquid sat behind the meat, looking like some kind of art sculpture. A pot of clear soup was in front of him, giving off a wonderful aroma. Somehow, when the light hit the soup in just the right way, a rainbow appeared in the soup. It reminded Joe of pictures he once saw of the aurora borealis.

Right behind the soup, Joe saw his sandwiches. There were five of them, arranged in a circle. Each of them was cut diagonally and professionally positioned as if in a commercial. The sandwiches were made from perfectly cured meats and aged cheese. The bread looked fresh and delicious, with the crust cut off. All together, this meal looked better than any Joe had seen advertised on TV, and would fit in a five star restaurant.

Joe was honestly flabbergasted. Less than five minutes ago, he had woken up and decided to slap together a few pieces of bread, meat, and cheese in his new kitchenette and eat it with a packaged salad and some dried meat. As Joe took the food from his refrigerator, he also grabbed a bottled sports drink and canned soup he had picked up from his shopping trip with Garment. Joe was feeling a little hungry after everything that had happened last night. As soon as he put his snack together, Joe had felt his abilities activate and had struggled to manage it with his half asleep mind. The result was the pile of food before him. Joe could tell that this food would be the best he had ever eaten and would never go stale or spoil. Some people would kill to get a meal this good. Joe just felt exasperated.

With a weak voice, Joe spoke to the feast laid before him.

"I just wanted a sandwich."

XXX

Edit: SPAG