Lights... Camera... ACTION!!: A Hollywood Quest

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT
Hi Magoose here one of the guys helping Duke.

So we have some bad news.

The quest has been canceled as duke does not want to write it anymore.

I'm going to ask if I can take over for it, because I like this quest, and it would be a shame to kill it
TBF, Mags, you have been doing a lot of the heavylifting for the quest, so this will be in good hands. :)

To be clear to everyone, this is just me burning out on imagination of the quest, since my muse has been hitting me over the head a lot with so many different ideas that I just can't find myself too interested in this.

I'll still hang out here, though, since this still does have a sepcial place in my heart.

I'd like to thank you all for making this a wonderful experience while it lasted.

I'd also like to thank @Magoose, @Fluffy_serpent, and @Martin Noctis for doing so much to help prepare and write this quest. I couldn't have done it without you all. :D

I'll see you all around.

With so many regards, Duke William Of.
 
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Say guys since China is isolated from the world trade what nations that dropped the bombs in fallout will be used instead because since China is isolated and the Soviet Union is showing cracks that doesn't leave anything for what started well the Great War or well the alternative sino American war (sino is now blank here because of the above)
It'd still be the Communists. Fallout's an alternate history and is meant to embody a lot of "Americana," so obviously the Great Enemy of America would still be communists, especially since the entire Cold War has still happened, it just might end sooner than OTL.
 
We're making Red Dawn aren't we? That's an action movie isn't it?
Well, when I think of action movies I think of those kind of films where there's one unstoppable protagonist who goes against, well, everything on his own. An unstoppable fighting machine that bulldozes over everyone, be it by using guns, weapons, or their own fists.
Say guys since China is isolated from the world trade what nations that dropped the bombs in fallout will be used instead because since China is isolated and the Soviet Union is showing cracks that doesn't leave anything for what started well the Great War or well the alternative sino American war (sino is now blank here because of the above)
I don't know...Communist Europe? I mean, Socialism has managed to root itself there to the point that trying to dig it out is becoming very difficult.

Personally, I would like it if we could continue with the Soviet Union as our enemy. I mean, it is an Atompunk world where the values of the 50s managed to last till the 21st century. It would not be out of the realm of possibility that the Soviet Union managed to survive by some sort of miracle.
 
Well, when I think of action movies I think of those kind of films where there's one unstoppable protagonist who goes against, well, everything on his own. An unstoppable fighting machine that bulldozes over everyone, be it by using guns, weapons, or their own fists.
Red Dawn is obviously still an action movie, it's just that you're thinking very specifically of the 80s kind of action movie. We probably need a few more of those kinds of films to try and capitalize on the craze for the 80s.
 
with a quick look in the pitch list i found those movie with the action in genre "Hercules/Sword of the Stranger/Gamera: Guardian of the Universe/Sherlock Holmes: The Conspiracy of Fear/The Rocketeer/Kung Fu Panda/Metroid/Sin CityRobert Lee Scott: Tiger and Propeller/Monsters Vs. Aliens/RRR:Roudram Ranam Rudhiram/Wanted/Star Wars : Rogue One/Django unchained/The Last Warchief:Joseph Medicine Crow/El Cantar de Mio Cid/Sisu/Battleship/Gamera: Rise of Drogu/Gamera: Evolution of Jiger/Megamind/Basil of Baker Street: The Lost Colony/Canadian warrior:Léo Major/Gamera: Advent of Legion"

hope it help a litle
 
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I think adding a Marion equivalent would, in a way, make her less relevant in the future.

Accepted. Its just Marion is the character that I feel plays off Indy best. From a narrative point of view having someone that keeps reminding him of her could be interesting but yes it would undercut Marion's uniqueness. I also don't want Capshaw to miss out on meeting Spielburg. i suppose its a personal preference thing, I just didn't enjoy the dynamic with Willie as much.

Perhaps we could have some framing device to explain it better. Like, perhaps Indy is speaking about an old adventure he had to Marion, or another archeologist, and then the entire movie is a flashback he has, with the ending having him look at an old picture taken with him, Willie and Short Round.

I like it. Having Indy explain to Marion about Willie Would be an interesting direction to take the film or as a stealth lead up to Last Crusade as he packs his bags and talks to Marcus Brody about the trouble unwatched Jonses gets into.

The actual first thing that jumped into my head was a princess bride like framing device to a child that is hinted to be Indy's and half of the weirder stuff Indy finds on the adventure are their inventions.

Not sure it would actually suit Indy but that where my mind went.

I'm not against it. Show that while the Thugee are the bad side of India, also show other Indians fighting against them or investigating, or even be the ones who save them at the end instead of the British.

Apart for anything else publishing a false image of India under the British after accuracy with Movies like Small Giant and John Henry feels wrong

Depending on release specifics and hints that ITL India is going to take OTL China's factory of the world status Lucasfilms support could result in interesting butterflys.

I'm all for the Last Crusade and the Fate of Atlantis, but those other two not so much.

Fate of Atlantis is probably my favorite non movie game, thought that may be nostalgia speaking, I would like to see it made into a movie. Anything else is more, oh we need an Indiana Jones title Rather than any attachmant to them.


We could always use them for video games or a TV show. There was apparently a young Indiana Jones cartoon that I found at the same time as the Rambo cartoon and I've thought about making a pitch for it.

I know about the Young Indiana Jones Live action, books and Comic book but a cartoon?

Please excuse me I must find out more.

edit
is this it?

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iE8v5WDbbC4


So I want you all to realize something when the next update comes tonight.

80s action has arrived

Quick get Chuck Norris. :).

He should be starting to boost his star power and release Silent Rage in April 1982. A Kung Fu Cop deals with a superhuman mentally ill foe. Kung Fu Frankenstine set in the West.

According to Wikipedia Filming begins on July 30 and Runs a month with backing from Colombia so it might alredy be too late for us to jump in. Chuck Norris's stated motivation was to have a big studio movie so we might want to offer him a stedy deal of movies and or Start Walker Texas Ranger Early. Clint Eastwood might be interested in making "modern" action westerns with him.
 
I know about the Young Indiana Jones Live action, books and Comic book but a cartoon?
I was mistaken. Yeah, it's a live action. We could always just make it a cartoon though.


Edit: There's also this that I found.
 
Well, we can try making The Expendables but feature the older stuntsmen of that era as well as newcomers.

Not sure if we can rope Jackie Chan into it
 
Anime Pitch The Laughing Salesman
Anime Pitch
The Laughing Salesman


Genre: Horror, Dark Comedy

Plot: Based on a manga by Fujiko Fujio, The Laughing Salesman stars the titular salesman Moguro Fukuzou. Supernatural and only ambiguously human, Moguro is rotund man with red lips who dresses in a black suit and has an iconic laugh . Each episode begins with the introduction of the "client" who has a vice, dream or desire the salesman will offer to help with, Often introducing himself with his business card where he promises to "fill their empty soul". While Moguro doesn't charge anything for his services after he has fulfilled his promise he will either give the client some advice or there will be a rule or limitation that he imposes on the client that most of them will disregard. After they break the rule the client will most often have a tragic (or occasionally comedic) fate befall them usually having their lives ruined or losing them entirely. Each episode ends with Moguro remarking on his clients fate and walking off to seek a new one.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I recently remembered this anime and figured I'd make a pitch about it.
 
Turn 90 (August 1981)
Turn 90 (August 1981):

Escape from New York:
Directed by: John Carpenter
Written by: John Carpenter, Nick Castle
Produced by: Larry Franco
, Debra Hill, Ron Miller
Production Studio: Walt Disney Studios.
Distribution: Buena Vista Distribution

Starring: Kurt Russel, Lee Van Cleef,Ernest Borgnine
,Donald Pleasence, Isaac Hayes, Harry Dean Stanton, Adrienne Barbeau


Quality:
D100 + 250 => 340
Audience:
D100 + 200 => 292
Critics:
D100 + 200 => 209


Budget: 6 Million
Domestic Profit: 91,760,258
International Profit: 99,657,506
-----------------------------

You and Mike and George were at an impromptu War council as you saw that, despite the low-budget flair, John Carpenter was doing something miraculous with a little action movie that could. And while it was not going to be breaking box office records, or even make a statement among the Indiana Jones and the Batman crowds… Mike was worried.

"They made even more money in profits than we expected. People seem to be eating this up!" He said.

"Mike you're over reacting," George said. "Besides, the movie is good, if a bit cliche. And the action was fun, but Bruce can do better in his sleep."

"Thanks for the encouragement George. But Mike has a point." You said. "It made a dent in the Indiana Jones slot, and people are already calling this Summer the Best of Action ever. And we haven't even gotten to star wars yet. Also, Disney put this out, you think they wouldn't have the balls to do that."

"Well Balls they do have," Mike said with a frown. "You know what I'm going to say."

"I know what you're going to say mike, but you have to remember who's name is on this company." You said.

George for his part was sheepish and tried to hide. "Bruce-"

"Well we need to hit back, and hard for that kind of work, I'm going to ask you for-"

"I know what you're going to ask, but it ain't December yet." You said sharply. "So come up with a plan, or convince me to do something."

Mike sighed, realizing that his lust for money was going to stop him. "Fine, but I need time."

"Time is what we have Mike." You than looked to George. "George, you've been quiet, what's wrong?"

George only shook his head. "I'm going on vacation."

You frowned. "Right now?"

"Yeah, now, Steven invited me to Hawaii, and there is not a chance in hell I am missing this." He stated.

Oh. "Well have a good time."

"Try not to get Carrie pregnant while I'm gone, we have Star Wars to shoot next year." George said as he stood up to leave.

As he left you frowned and looked at Mike. "Don't say it."

"As the man you have basically put in charge of your company in all but name, I'm telling you that he has a point. But as your good friend, I'm also going to ask you to not… try and ruin future movies by adoring your wife."

"I should punch you in the face for even telling me that!" You proclaimed, jokingly, knowing that he was indeed right. "We're both trying to get control of our professional lives, and it's going to be something that we're both trying to wrangle. And we have Mary to worry about with her preschool coming up."

Mike then raised his hands in mock surrender. "Forgive me for thinking of the business for a moment. I know your-"

"I know, but that does not mean I can just leave it be."
-----------------------------------------------------------------

The Scripts

All are together with their quality after:
Paul Schrader:
Sisu:D100 + 200 => 247
Flight of the Navigator:D100 + 200 => 271
John Milnius:
The Mask of the Black Death:D100 + 200 => 242
The Last Warchief: Joseph Medicine Crow:D100 + 200 => 277
David Alister:
El Cantar de Mio Cid:D100 + 200 => 284
Wise Guys:
D100 + 200 => 225
Robert Zemekis:
Star Wars: Rogue One:D100 + 200 => 300

---------------------------------------

Dune Production Actions
Due to production about to begin, there is one action available.

[]The Herald of the Change: Francis took a look at the script, and managed to add in one more little… change. But he needs a great actor with gravitas and power. So… You. Nothing but twenty minutes of work on a few shooting days, nothing more.
-------------------------------------------

Lucasfilms Actions:

[]The Bros: So let's see this silly Comedy make a wave! DC: 20

[]Star Wars Issues: So… George may have been on a vacation. But something has come up. Lawrence and David were arguing for the title. George and David thought Return of the Jedi was better. While Lawrence thought revenge of the Jedi was… more thematically appropriate.

[]The People who want you to star in a movie: With most of Hollywood open to you again after the informal ending of your banishment from nonlucasfilm and TV productions, there are a few films that have come to your attention. DC: ???

[]Investing in the Future: You want to Spend some of that money you made into the company and make the whole thing better DC: ??? (Linetail what you want to invest in, and how much money you want to invest in it)

[]Look for Investors: Not that you need the money now, but maybe you can get people on board with this idea you have. DC: ???

[]Distributing Deals: Since you have a Distribution Company, or rather, are one… You can meet the major movie theater companies and strike a Deal with them. Even when you had nothing to offer them. DC: ???

[]Importing Foreign Films: So… you may have a way to get some films showing in American Theaters. Maybe you can go to other foreign film industries and… well, ask to distribute their films. Sure many of those foreign film companies never expected an American company to distribute their films in the US… but maybe you can get money without producing them. (Linetail where you try to get films from, and if there are any specific films, line tail them below) DC: ???

[]The Ideas of Industry: This action is meant for a write-in to act as a sort of Idea machine for the company. You must detail what you want to do below this action. This action can be taken multiple times.

Personal Actions:

[]As the Seasons change: The Romanian Government respectfully invited you and Brian to see the new memorial you funded last year. You think it would be okay. DC: 0

[]Carrie Working Out: Carrie wants to, in her eyes, lose more weight from all the pregnancies she had, and never having a chance to slim down after Star Wars due to the twins, and she wants to do it with you…So you will obliged her.

[]Dad's Got some Issues: Dad has come to you with some troubling news. "Bruce, it's Universal… They're trying to get me to star in some stupid Action film." DC: 30

[]In the Interests of Clint: Clint Eastwood was always a bit… strange, but now he is putting his foot down with you. "Bruce, I need your help before I actually shoot someone. Some asshole at Colombia has stolen a Western I wanted, and I need that Western." DC: 40

[]The Family Time: You need a night out with the family dammit! No more drama, no more work, just you and Carrie and the Kids!

[]Hanging out with the Friends: It's been far to long since you, John, and Robin hung out, so you will go out for some drinks and have some fun. DC: 45

[]A Well-Known Fan: So some really famous person is a fan of yours. Maybe you'll learn who they actually are. DC???

[]Learn to play an instrument: You want to learn how to play something DC: 80 (You have no idea what the hell you are doing.)

[]Investments: You want to invest your hard-earned cash into something that you feel will be a good return on investment. And as well as diversify your assets DC: 0 (Linetail what you wish to invest in below this action, and the amount of money you want to invest in)

[]The O'Riely Foundation Lobbying: You want California to help the men who have given nearly everything and more to this country. DC: ??? (Linetail how much money you want to throw at it, and what you want from the State)

[]A Charitable Heart: You want to invest your newfound wealth. Maybe even save some lives while you are at it. (Linetail what you wish to invest in below this action, and the amount of money you want to donate in)

[]Networking: Well time to start finding out who might actually be interested in meeting you. (Write-in what you want to try and network with)

[]Pray: It had been a long time since you went to Mass. You wish for the Lord to give you strength. DC: ???

[]Action Directing: It seems the town has been talking about how much of a beast you are at just being a stunt person. In fact, they knew you were a student of Bruce Lee. And they think you know how to stage and block a fight? Maybe you can DC? ???

[] Do auditions(Movies and TV Shows): You are going to go to some of the casting calls that are in the place where you can find work in. DC: 20(Possibility of only getting a commercial or TV show job, or extra work in a low-budget film)

[]Modeling (High Fashion): So you got a call from a photographer in LA, some no name. But that no name works for Gucci. And he wants you on their next lineup of products. And he needs you to model for him. Which is great… one problem, you have no idea what the hell you are doing. DC: 60

[]Modeling (Advertisements): Thankfully another Call Came in, one from an ad firm. They need you to have some pictures taken so that they are used for saner things. Like selling cars, or ice cream. DC: 40

[]Workout: A Healthy Mind and a Healthy Body are Key to having a good life, and you have been slacking as of late. Time to hit the workout and discipline, and perhaps, see things differently. DC: 30 Reward: You work out and feel better.

[] Ask Clint if you can act in a movie of his: You know you want to see if you can act opposite him, for a good time. DC: 40 (Clint wants to work with you.)

[] Gophering, and other signs of stuff: You want to try and learn how work behind the camera works, and what better way than being a gopher. DC: 50 (You have no idea what the hell they were doing, and you have no idea either)

[] Take a walk: Dad always said that the best ways to get inspiration are by walking, talking, and being open-minded. So you'll try that. DC: 10 (You are just going for a walk, what could be really said?)

[] Register in a theater: There are quite a few theater troops that are looking for some seasonal help for some play's that the regulars could not get to. Perhaps you can work there for a while. DC: 40 (Everyone wants to be famous here in Hollywood.)

[] Go to a bar or something to make jokes: You wanted to try some comedy, perhaps you can try. even with your shit timing. DC: 40 (Your Lack of comedy chops is going to be something that will bite you.)

[] Practice writing: You want to write something, maybe even a script. At least to learn the craft. DC: 20 (You try your hand at screenwriting, and maybe get something that is worth a damn.)

[] Research stuff, see if anything piques your interest: You may have graduated High School as a kid, but you never stopped trying to learn. DC: 15 (Write-in what you want to learn about below)



An: enjoy and vote in plan format please.
 
That Rouge One script is looking very good, also The Last War Chief sounds interesting. Going to have to look up who that's about.
 
[X] Plan If I Hafta Work, Then At Least Let's Make It Fun
-[X] The Herald of the Change
: Francis took a look at the script, and managed to add in one more little… change. But he needs a great actor with gravitas and power. So… You. Nothing but twenty minutes of work on a few shooting days, nothing more.
-[X] The Bros: So let's see this silly Comedy make a wave! DC: 20
-[X] Star Wars Issues: So…George may have been on a vacation. But something has come up. Lawrence and David were arguing for the title. George and David thought Return of the Jedi was better. While Lawrence thought revenge of the Jedi was…more thematically appropriate.
-[X] Investing in the Future: You want to Spend some of that money you made into the company and make the whole thing better DC: ??? (Linetail what you want to invest in, and how much money you want to invest in it)
--[X] Ardmore Studios [$20 Million]: Lucasfilm Unlimited is excited to announce its intention to acquire Ardmore Studios, a move that will facilitate the expansion of its operations into Europe while making a significant contribution to the Irish economy. By acquiring Ardmore Studios, Lucasfilm Unlimited aims to establish a strong foothold in Europe and leverage the studio's existing infrastructure and expertise. This strategic partnership will not only bring world-class film production capabilities to Ireland but also create numerous job opportunities and foster economic growth in the local community. Lucasfilm Unlimited is committed to supporting Ireland's creative industries and looks forward to collaborating with local talent and contributing to the flourishing entertainment sector in the country.
---[X] Due to the current workload, instead of traveling to negotiate in person, invite the relevant figures and their representatives to negotiate these sales in LA on your dime; you also plan on having Mike and your dad there to help with negotiations.
-[X] TSR, Inc. [$22 Million] After much prompting from Mike and Carrie, especially following the release of R. Talsorian's Cyberpunk TTRPG, you've finally given in and decided to back Lucasfilm Unlimited's acquisition of TSR, Inc. Shockingly there hasn't been much interest in their game beyond the nieche, even though most everyone you know plays it. So, Mike had a plan that involved a lot of fluff words that went something like: "The initial phase involves conducting market research to assess TSR, Inc.'s current market position and potential synergies. A financial assessment will follow to evaluate the company's valuation, assets, and revenue streams. Strategic alignment will be identified, focusing on how the acquisition can enhance Lucasfilm's existing intellectual properties. Legal and regulatory considerations will be addressed to ensure a smooth acquisition process. A detailed integration plan will be developed-". You know, making it pretty for the lawyers.
-[X] As the Seasons Change: The Romanian Government respectfully invited you and Brian to see the new memorial you funded last year. You think it would be okay. DC: 0
-[X] Carrie Working Out: Carrie wants to, in her eyes, lose more weight from all the pregnancies she had, and never having a chance to slim down after Star Wars due to the twins, and she wants to do it with you…So you will obliged her.
-[X] Dad's Got Some Issues: Dad has come to you with some troubling news. "Bruce, it's Universal… They're trying to get me to star in some stupid Action film." DC: 30
-[X] In the Interests of Clint: Clint Eastwood was always a bit… strange, but now he is putting his foot down with you. "Bruce, I need your help before I actually shoot someone. Some asshole at Colombia has stolen a Western I wanted, and I need that Western." DC: 40
-[X] The Family Time: You need a night out with the family dammit! No more drama, no more work, just you and Carrie and the Kids!
-[X] Hanging out with the Friends: It's been far to long since you, John, and Robin hung out, so you will go out for some drinks and have some fun. DC: 45
-[X] Investments: You want to invest your hard-earned cash into something that you feel will be a good return on investment. And as well as diversify your assets DC: 0 (Linetail what you wish to invest in below this action, and the amount of money you want to invest in)
--[X] The Bruce Lee Memorial Gymnasium Franchise [$150 Million]: You've honestly been thinking about having the gym branch out to other locales for awhile now, and with you wanting to ensure your master's lessons are spread as far as they possibly can be, martial and philosophical, now might be the time to see about expanding into other major American cities, like Chicago, Houston and New York. And while we're at it, elevate Linda into being its CEO.


[EDIT: TL;DR: Beyond the time sensitive minutae of work and personal lives, I'd like to take the opertunity to expand out operations with Lucasfilms by not only getting our hands on D&D, but also expanding our operations overseas by having Ireland be our main EU Office and Distribution Center. Lastly, to finally complete the Gym and franchise it out to take advantage of the both the Health Fitness boom of the '80s and the current HEMA manina.]
 
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The Scripts

All are together with their quality after:
Paul Schrader:
Sisu:D100 + 200 => 247
Flight of the Navigator:D100 + 200 => 271
John Milnius:
The Mask of the Black Death:D100 + 200 => 242
The Last Warchief: Joseph Medicine Crow:D100 + 200 => 277
David Alister:
El Cantar de Mio Cid:D100 + 200 => 284
Wise Guys:
D100 + 200 => 225
Robert Zemekis:
Star Wars: Rogue One:D100 + 200 => 300
Out of curiosity, how do you decide what films get scripts rolled for during these turns?
 
Alright, i don't have a full idea of what I completely want to do yet, but one thing I'm sure of, I want to make a small change in the script and see if we can include Princess Irulan and make her appear in Part 1 as I have put in my notes, and as I have already explained before in the thread. I think it can be helpful and give her something better to do than just serve as a narrator and have a few appearances in Part 2.

However, if you guys think we should let it be, then I will acquiesce.

As for the rest, I'll speak about it later.

Oh, and let's not forget to buy Forgotten Realms as well.
 
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Movie Pitch: Spaceballs
I remembered seeing this movie when I found it in YouTube, and when I saw it again I found it to be just as charming and funny as I remembered. Spaceballs is truly one of those great films that just remains with you through your childhood and adulthood, enough for me to want to try and make it again, but this time with us as the ones producing it.

Reading back on the history of the movie, I found it odd how there had to be assurances that Spaceballs would not make any merchandise, but then again Yogurt's message would not have been that potent I, guess. With us at the helm we can make sure to give Spaceballs the royal treatment it deserves as a parody of the greatest movie ever told, not to mention actually getting some actors that are well known. Don't get me wrong, the original cast did a good job, but I think we should at least present the possibility of also putting in some well-known characters that may play the roles.

Thus, I give you:

Movie Pitch:
Spaceballs


GENRE: Comedy/Parody/Adventure

SUBGENRE: Slapstick/Suspense/Space Opera

FORMAT: Movie

Set Up: It is primarily a parody of the original Star Wars trilogy, but also parodies other sci-fi films and popular franchises including Star Trek, Alien, The Wizard of Oz, 2001: A Space Odyssey, Planet of the Apes, and Transformers. Heroic mercenary Lone Starr and his alien sidekick Barf rescue Princess Vespa of Druidia and her droid, Dot Matrix, from being captured by the Spaceballs, led by President Skroob, who wants to use Vespa as ransom to obtain Druidia's air for their own planet. However, the heroes get stranded on a desert moon, where they encounter the wise Yogurt, who teaches Starr about the metaphysical power known as "the Schwartz". Meanwhile, Spaceball commanders Dark Helmet and Colonel Sandurz lead the search for them but are hindered by their own incompetence.

Director: Mel Brooks
Composer: John Morris

Lone Starr: He is the captain of the Winnebago, Eagle 5. He and his co-pilot, Barf, were hired by Roland, King of the Druids, to rescue his daughter, Princess Vespa from the Spaceballs. While being pursued, he was trained by Yogurt to use the power known as the Schwartz, which he used to defeat the Spaceballs.

Played By: Bill Pullman
Alternate: Tom Hanks

Princess Vespa: She is the spoiled daughter of King Roland, the princess of Planet Druidia and Heir Apparent to the Druidian Throne. She almost married Prince Valium but married Lone Starr. She is a vain and prideful princess who nonetheless also wants to marry for love. She also balks at the idea of having to do anything for herself, expecting that others will do it because she's a Princess.

Played By: Daphne Zuniga
Alternate: Lea Thompson

Dark Helmet: He is a villainous Spaceball who possessed the Downside of the Schwartz and assisted President Skroob in gathering more air for Planet Spaceball. Dark Helmet is used to throw his weight around everyone, and has a childish side to him as he cannot seem to resist taunting his allies and enemies, even when he's at the cusp of victory.

Played By: Rick Moranis
Alternate: Gene Wilder
Barf: Real name Barfolomew, he is Lone Starr's best friend and co-pilot. He was a mawg (Half Man, Half Dog), his dog half being that of a golden retriever. Barf usually is more cowardly than Lone Starr, but also easily convinced to join him in the adventure, as well as more opportunistic when it comes to keeping all the money to themselves.

Played By: John Candy
Alternate: Dan Aykroyd

Dot Matrix: She is the droid of Honor of Princess Vespa. She usually is the one who tries to keep Vespa's unrealistic expectations more grounded, though she has her own idiosyncrasies, like having a "Virgin Alert" that alerts her whenever Vespa is too close to a man, as well as having Roller Skates on her feet.

Played By: Joan Rivers
Alternate: Betty Lou Gerson

Colonel Sandurz: He is the main commander under Dark Helmet's command aboard the Spaceball I. A follower through and through who mostly serves to be belittled by Dark Helmet and follow orders. He usually repeats what Dark Helmet says and gives exposition about the situation they're in.

Played By: George Wyner
Alternate: Burt Reynolds
President Skroob: He is the president of the Planet Spaceball who sought to steal the air from Planet Druidia. He's a moron who nonetheless has complete control over both Dark Helmet and Colonel Sandurz.

Played By: John Ratzenberger

King Roland: He is the King of the Planet Druidia and father of Princess Vespa. He loved his daughter dearly, and spoiled her rotten with such possessions as fancy dresses, matched luggage, and a Mercedes cruiser.

Played By: Dick Van Patten

Minister: He is an unidentified minister who presided over weddings (even some that have nothing to do with love) on Planet Druidia, at the First Intergalactic Temple (Reformed) of the Druids.

Played By: Ronny Graham

Prince Valium: He is a drowsy prince. For a time, he was believed to be the last prince in the galaxy eligible to marry Princess Vespa, so a wedding was planned to unite them.

Played By: Mark Hamill

Commanderette Zircon: She is a Spaceball officer who was stationed in Spaceball City. She had a habit of calling President Skroob at inconvenient times.

Played By: Carrie O'Brian

Vinnie: He is a robotic Mafioso-like subordinate of Pizza the Hutt. He appeared to suffer from some sort of mechanical glitch, which often caused him to twitch between sentences and enjoyed eating his boss's cheesy body.

Played By: Bruce O'Brian

Pizza the Hut: He is a Half-Human, Half-Pizza Crime Lord. He gave Lone Starr a loan which he now demands Lone Starr pay at exorbitant interest. He dies at the end of the film, having eaten himself when he was locked in his car with no food.

Played By: Dom DeLuise

Yogurt: He is a keeper of a power known as the Schwartz (as well as the Power of Merchandising!) and he resided on the Moon of Vega, where he taught Lone Starr of the Schwartz. He also helped him go and rescue Princess Vespa.

Played By: Mel Brooks

A.N.: Once more, thanks to @Carcer for the idea. I've put both Mark, Carrie and us in some small roles do as to make Cameos in the film. If Brooks prefers other actors then we can bow out, I just thought it would be funny. Mel also wanted to try and find some well-known actors for the film, but nearly everyone rejected him so he just threw his hands in the air and decided to go with virtually unknowns, but with Lucasfilms at the helm there might be another path to follow.
 
Unfortunately, that won't become a thing for another five to six years, as it won't be released until '87.

Until then, we'll have to make due with the Blackmoor, Greyhawk and Mystara settings.
Forgotten Realms was created in 1967. 1987 was when TSR released it after buying it from Ed Greenwood. So, the faster we buy it, the better we work with it.
 
Let's hope the satanic panic doesn't kick off just yet.


Although given dark Disney and the like our rivals might have just as much trouble.


I wonder if all those movies correlating tabletops with loss of the ability to distinguish reality from fiction will come out as hit pieces against Lucasfilms this time around rather than those jumping on the satanic panic bandwagon....
 
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