Culture Watch Wrap-up Awards 2053 (canon)
- Location
- Hyperborea
Culture Watch Wrap-up Awards 2053
"Happy New Year and welcome back to the year's last Culture Watch with the Archives and History Department. Or, as I like to call it no matter how many times my boring coworkers tell me to stop: CWAHD. We watch what you watch! (And you're sure we okayed that tagline with InOps? I don't want to step on any toes, especially InOps. We clear? Good)."
"Starting with season's greetings, the Most Popular Christmas Movie has proven to be a truly eternal classic: It's a Wonderful Life dating all the way back to 1946. We're supposed to be unbiased in this agency, merely recording and preserving data, but I personally find it incredibly reassuring that the message of the inherent sanctity and value of human life has proven to be timeless. Indeed, perhaps it is even more relevant than ever before."
"In other recent news, while the category of Most Popular Educational Video has as usual remained the perpetually popular Tiberium and You: How to stay safe, we do have an honourable mention with the special category Most Exponentially Popular Educational Video and the Fastest Growing Search Term, drumroll please...: How Do I Become an Astronaut?, the first episode of the space-themed educational show Head's Up!, whose sudden popularity has lead to calls for Space Force to create an updated version to reflect the changes in how the GDI space program works. Expect more news on that in the future (unless Vice Admiral Carter somehow fails to nurture the hopes and dreams of a generation, that is. No, I will not be silent on this! You know I'm right.). Anyway, moving on to Literature (before someone cuts my microphone. Again.)."
"Our categories here have once predictable winner and one unexpected one, so for the sake of suspense we'll obviously discuss the former first. In our Most Popular Non-Fiction Literature we have a trusted boon companion of humanity in these troubled days, a dearly beloved tome of wisdom which every household is familiar with, translated into dozens of languages as a public service, drumroll please... The Layman's Illustrated Guide to Clothing Repair and Maintenance: Making the Most with the Least. The guide we all love to have yet wish we didn't need."
"The Most Popular Fiction Book was hotly contested, but in the end (drumroll please), The Life and Adventures of Robinson Crusoe managed to pull ahead of the rest thanks to a large popularity in the Yellow Zones. Perhaps surprising to those who wouldn't expect a story set on a tropical island to be a hit in areas so hard hit by Tiberium, but that's only a surface reading. Besides having been translated into numerous languages for centuries, that a story of man's perseverance despite isolation, grief, and hardship would still be able to touch the hearts of people in a world beset by Tiberium makes perfect sense."
"Those are the highlights, if you wish to know more, including such topics as Most Popular Music Genre in the Red Zone and Most Popular Original Fiction, please watch the full program or access the written report on user statistics directly from the Archives and History Department. Happy New Year, stay safe, and never stop learning."
An omake from one of the less well-known departments whom we don't hear about because they don't cause problems and just stay busy with the work of keeping mankind's cultural heritage accessible to this generation and alive for future generations.
I have some other ideas for these guys, like a look at the most popular media in various GDI Departments and a look at new stuff being made once we get more Services up and running or when CarterQuest starts making documentaries about itself. I meant to finish this before @BOTcommander updated, but distractions and procrastination got in the way.
Trivia: I have the Most Popular Music Genre from the Red Zone pegged as throatsinging and the running gag of asking for a drumroll and receiving a different instrument is a reference to Beakman's World.
I have some other ideas for these guys, like a look at the most popular media in various GDI Departments and a look at new stuff being made once we get more Services up and running or when CarterQuest starts making documentaries about itself. I meant to finish this before @BOTcommander updated, but distractions and procrastination got in the way.
Trivia: I have the Most Popular Music Genre from the Red Zone pegged as throatsinging and the running gag of asking for a drumroll and receiving a different instrument is a reference to Beakman's World.
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