There was a fortress by the Black Blood Pass,
With a chieftain who's an ass,
And a mammoth living there.
it had no parents and was all alone,
It got by on its own,
And it liked it pretty well.
'Cause it never wore its socks,
It had a pet snake,
It bought a rad guitar,
And it drank a whole lake.
And there wasn't anybody there to tell it what to do,
So it did what it wanted to.
Everybody knew the story of the mammoth who saved itself.
(Mammoth who saved itself)
(Mammoth who saved itself)
There was a dragon with a pointy tail,
He was bigger than a whale,
And his breath was terrible.
He scared the mammoth when he came around,
Tried to burn the fortress down,
But it caught him by his tail.
Then it tied him to a tree,
So the dragon couldn't fly,
It told him he was mean,
And that made the dragon cry.
When he finally apologized it offered him some tea,
He accepted it graciously.
Now he visits every weekend with the mammoth who saved itself.
(Mammoth who saved itself)
(Mammoth who saved itself)
There was a wizard who was full of greed,
She took things she didn't need,
And she looted everyone.
She saw the mammoth chilling without fear,
Made the greatsword dissapear,
Asked "you wanna hit the road?"
So they caught up to the rest,
At a very gentle pace,
They started up a band,
And the dragon played the bass.
Every Saturday they play until their fingertips are sore,
Mostly Math Rock and Ulgu Core.
And they call themselves The College Of The Mammoth Who Saved Itself.
(Mammoth who saved itself)
(Mammoth who saved itself)
The mammoth who saved itself.
(Mammoth who saved itself)
(Mammoth who saved itself)
The Princess who saved herself, Jonathan Coulton. Self sabotaging? Maybe, but I'm still having fun here, and look forward to being a one man mammoth faction in the future. If we confirm a gender for Tusky Stompers von Black Blood Pass, will edit accordingly.