Voted best in category in the Users' Choice awards.
The implication set out there was that the assassin could be mistaken for an Imperial Trader, so no Skaven hauling Brass Orbs. Someone using obviously chaotic weaponry wouldn't earn Cathay's ire towards the Empire. It needs to be somewhat compatible with general imperial image.

The reason I found it funny is that Zhao Ming is one of the tankiest characters in Total War, with Iron Skin, one of the highest Ward Saves in the game if you build him up, and regeneration. And he can turn into a Dragon. There are very few targets that would be worse to aim for.

But then again, nobody reads those knockoff porn books for the plot, so it checks out.
 
I assure you that Vampire Counts count too.


Has the housing tradition with apprentices changed, or is Eike in communal living only because she is relatively recent apprentice?
I believe that Mathilde is talking about after she became Regimand's apprentice, rather than merely holding the rank of apprentice.

Some Vampire Counts have a complex about counting- a compulsion to count small objects is one of the possible flaws for a Vampire.

Keep a bag of seeds handy, you never know when it'll come up!
I think Puc is making a joke about the Sesame Street character.
 
And THE DRAON EMPEROR AND EMPRESS both REFUSE to look upon MAGDA, yet display a GREAT CURIOSITY about her life and MANY GREAT DEEDS!

The Dragon Emperor and Empress are depicted as white and black Cathayan dragons, floating above their ornate Dragon Thrones, their serpentine bodies coiled together, wrapping around the painting to form it's boarder. Both are hiding their eyes behind clawed hands, but while the Emperor has a look of shame, the Empress has a look of joy.
Man, I almost feel sorry for the fictional dragon rulers here. Mathilde's typical antics would definitely cause some problems.
 
Nagash's pyramid and bats hat looks suspiciously similar to night goblins' sausages and mash potato pile hats. Who is taking fashion tips from who?
Nagash's whole thing is stealing other races magic to combine with his own.

Also its much funnier if he actually needs that dumb hat because he counldn't come up with anything better than some goblin threw together in a few hours over the course of literal millennia.
 
You count them off on your fingers and toes - three Barons, six Counts (only human Counts count), two Countesses, one Grand Mayor, one Lord Mayor, one regular Mayor but he's the Mayor of Wurtbad so he gets an invite, two High Priests, and one Knight Commander.
Apparently Mathilde used to count on her fingers and toes.

Then you sigh, close your eyes, and consult the cipher table that still glows on the inside of your eyelids whenever you think about it.
Completely forgot this.
 
@Boney, wanted to ask why my MAGDA WESSEN piece was put in Media, while it seems like the previous ones are in Apocrypha?

I misremembered where the other ones were. Fixed.

Has the housing tradition with apprentices changed, or is Eike in communal living only because she is relatively recent apprentice?

Senior Apprentices can transfer to a cell if they want to and their Master signs off on it.
 
…So, completely random thing, but I was just listening to some music that I honestly can't even remember the name of, but it had this really powerful line about someone's soul being saved, which reminded me of Mathilde pulling the Vlag dwarves from the warp… and then I got this really epic and chilling image in my mind for a mural, or painting of some sort that I could totally see the dwarves making to commemorate the act. But I'm shit at art, so I thought I would describe it to you all instead.

The first thing of note is that this is a split image like you'll sometimes see for contrast, a top half and a bottom. The top half is beautiful, of course, in the way only a dwarven craftsman could make, depicting a wide plain before a lonely mountain, around which flies the shadow of a dragon. It's a pretty idyllic scene, caught right at sunset as day fades and the stars start to come out for night, but also kind of sad as a deep, dark red stains the edges that could be the dying light of day… or blood. The most important thing, however, is what decorates the plain.

Most obvious is Mathilde, or a stylized rendering of her that comes off as more spirit than woman. She stands just off center to the right, and side-facing to the left, one golden eye glowing as it peers out from under the shadows of her wide brimmed hat, down and again towards the left and a soft smile on her face. Her torso is as expected, the visible shoulder covered by a helldrake scale under which flows her Grey robes, down her arms and body… until the waist, where it starts to blend into shadow until even her legs aren't visible, simply a pillar of black spilling down and out to form a pool of shadows that makes up the divide from top and bottom. One hand holds her sword, down and behind her—essentially pointing to the bottom right—in a ready position as it's runes glow, and the other is held out, seemingly pulling a dwarf from the pool of darkness that is her shadow. Across from her, equidistant from the rescued dwarf who is positioned directly in the center, is what at first glance seems to be a white tree, but is actually a staff of bone, with a black cat sitting on top, curled up lazily but watching with keen eyes over a surprisingly non-comical mustache marking, like how some cats have tuxedo patterns in their fur?

And then there's the bottom half. This is a much less defined image, with no real background besides random swirls of blue, red, pink and green. Here you see the bottom half of the dwarf above, encircled by three more dwarves facing outwards, axes and hammer in hand, symmetrically placed of course. Around them is a veritable horde of stylized monsters, not quite recognizable as any particular kind of daemon but most often lithe, with sharp claws and long tongues as befitting Slaaneshi creatures. Th center of the bottom border even seems to open into a gaping maw. The dwarves are clearly grimly stalwart despite outnumbered and outgunned.

But, they are not alone. Between them and the daemons is a circle of shadow, spilled from the border above, and out of the shadows springs blades and claws and fins to tear at the horde. More importantly, at the point of the circle closest to the mouth on the border, the shadows form the symbol of the Protector, and all the daemons shy away from it, preferring to attack from the other sides. The berth given to it is small, but noticeable.

And that's it. Maybe some other minor details could be spared for the rest of the Expedition, and it's also probably too metaphorical for dwarven artwork, but that's the image in my head. I just wish I had the ability to get it out and onto paper.
 
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My guess is around 17. enough time to get rusty with the cantrips.
Interesting. I'd go younger tbh. She apparently still had Morr the cat, plus, she was only 19/20 when she left Altdorf to go to Stirland. I'd guess around 15, which would be unusual, but she seems to have awoken her magic relatively early.
 
Silly Exercise
Silly Exercise:

Greetings Oma, I hope you're having a good day.

I'm fine. Better than fine actually, since I'm now part of a friend group with people that I like very much. If you're reading this letter, then I'm sorry for involving you in this convoluted training exercise, but it's been fun the last two times so I thought why not join in?

The gist of it is this: I'm going to be going over my three friends in detail, including one embarrassing silly secret that you probably wouldn't care about that they would be embarrassed to find out I've put in here. I'm supposed to encrypt this message and bring it over to the Archives department for it to be vetted and eventually released to you. My friends are supposed to intercept me from submitting the message once it's been fully written and encrypted, and then they have to decrypt it, in which case they win. If I submit the message to the Archives department, I win.

So, here goes nothing:

Linda Tischler:

Hobbies: Sewing, Gossip, Baking (she's really bad at it unfortunately)
Likes: Boys, fashion, sweets, gossip
Dislikes: Exercise, sparring, bossy people

Linda is one of my dearest friends. She's dependable, reliable and quite nice, but the same can be said for all my friends in the Grey College really. She helped me out when I was going through my monthlies, covered for me when I was late to class, helped me out when I was confused, and offered to accompany me if I was feeling unsafe. She says that it's "her duty" as my senior of one year, but I think she's just a big softie. She talks about boys far more than any of my other friends (when they deign to speak on the topic), and she's a bit of a gossip, but I enjoy her enthusiasm and energy when she fills the silences that so often fill our group with her endless chatter. It's not inane by any means, but I have to admit that I tune out quite frequently. She speaks on a lot of topics that I have little interest in.

Part of that must be her inclination towards the social aspect of being a Grey Wizard. Apparently there's a lot of opportunities for that if you're going for the diplomat role, which she's enthusiastic about because she doesn't seem to like physical activity or sparring. She says she "doesn't like getting sweaty and gross" but I think it's more than that.

Embarrassing secrets. I'm going for the low hanging fruit and say that she has a crush on Egil the Senior Apprentice. She keeps going on and on about his "beautiful golden hair" and "foamy sea blue eyes" and I don't really get it. He's been leaving the College more and more often and it's making her sad because as confident as she can be, she's kind of a mess when she's talking to him. I guess that's embarrassing? I'm sure you don't care, but she would, and that's good enough. By the way, this is done with total permission granted by all parties, so there's no hard feelings anyway. I'm not sure this will even reach you anyways.

Charlotte:

Hobbies: Reading, Writing
Likes: Reading, Puzzles, Problem Solving, Mathematics (Believe me, I was confused too)
Dislikes: Book burners, Witch Hunters, Unrepentant Murderers, lack of justice

Charlotte is in many ways simpler and more complex than Linda. Sometimes she's as quiet as Esme, sometimes she talks as much as Linda with no filter. You don't want to interrupt her while she's reading, but she lights up like a torch the instant you ask her what she's reading or what she's writing. She's creative and has a boundless imagination, and maybe that's why she's so good at visualisation and magic theory. Whenever I struggle with magical concepts, I know that she's the one to go to.

A conversation with Charlotte, on the other hand, is never simple. It's hard to keep up, and if you demonstrate that you're not quite on her level, she loses interest in following up. It's the kind of disappointment that drives me to do better even though I really don't have to. I've never been the competitive type before, but Char and Esme make me try harder than I ever have before. I wonder if that's something I've always had and never developed because I never had any true friends before now.

Another thing about Char is that she's a devout Verenan. It's rude to ask someone about their life before the College without prompting, but she has some very strong feelings about justice. And books. Let's not forget the books, because if you do, she will remind you about them in stringent detail. I've never seen anyone get so excited about libraries. I wonder if that's what Mathilde's like when it comes to books too. I would introduce Char to her if she wasn't so intimidated by the concept of the "big scary lady wearing the Witch Hunter hat". I sometimes feel compelled to tell Mathilde to not wear the hat when she goes into the room. I think Char hates it.

Embarrassing secret. She sometimes reads books that I'm pretty sure she shouldn't. And not, like, illegal shouldn't. More like I'm pretty sure a 14 year old shouldn't be reading those books shouldn't. She panics really badly when we catch her doing it and it's always funny. She's very cute when she's flustered.

Esmeralda Di Angelo:

Hobbies: Fencing, Strategy Games
Likes: Practice, Difficult Challenges, Success, Cute Things
Dislikes: Failure, Complacency, Derision

From the name you can probably guess, but Esme isn't Imperial. She's a second generation Estalian/Tilean kid, coming from the combined bloodline of an Estalian Fencer and a renowned Tilean artistic and engineering family. She's the quietest of all of us, and fairly stoic, but that only hides how much she truly cares. She's the first one to check up on all of us if we're hurt or to make sure we're alright. She happens to be my most frequent sparring partner, and I couldn't be more grateful. Esme makes me aspire to improve and become better, because I can count the number of times I've defeated her in spars on one hand.

She is a truly fearsome fencer. We're taught how to defend ourselves and use weapons if need be, because magic can be our enemy as much as our ally. I was initially hesitant about that, but Shallya says that a "stout walking stick is all one needs", so that's what I took for my weapon. A quarterstaff. It's a great weapon for what I want. Good range, flexible and versatile for what I want, and it can be non-lethal if applied correctly.

Unfortunately for me, in all my time practicing, I've barely managed to win against Esme. She's swift and efficient in her movements, with little to no imperfections or openings that I can exploit. When we first started to use magic in our sparring sessions, I managed to catch her off guard with a Move cantrip and win, but she quickly adapted.

That's the thing about Esme. She's so determined and focused that she can lose track of things. She can be caught off guard and be surprised by things that she didn't expect. If she has time to adapt, then she will do so quickly, but it only takes one mistake to take someone down. That's what Mathilde says anyway. It makes me worried about her.

As an aside, we're also strategy board game partners. We play games once every two days, alternating between any board game we can find, from Chess to Blingo and beyond, and she always picks up on those things fast. I think Esme was raised Myrmidian, because I can see a Myrmidian medallion sometimes peeking out of her shirt. I'm not sure if that has anything to do with it, but she crushes me at those strategy games too. Well, most of the time. I have a much better win record on strategy games than spars, even if it's 7-3 instead of the usual 9-1. It's best to mix things up to keep her off guard so she doesn't get too used to my tactics. It's telling though, that when I play with Charlotte or Linda they tend to lose. Charlotte is a very by the books kind of player, which means she's predictable. Shows you that even book smarts can't save you without… intuition? Anyways, Linda only really plays those games to entertain us. She doesn't really care about them. She does like the "cute horsies" (her words, not mine) though, and suggested something that we all took up as our newest hobby.

According to Esme, there's a fairly intricate wargame being played in Myrmidian temples using figurines called "miniatures" and a board and some dice. I think it's called "Warspear" or something. Through the intricate "underground trading network" of the Grey College Apprentice dorms (mostly Linda's parents, who are carpenters, and Esme's mom, who's a painter), we managed to get wood carved miniatures and supplies to paint them. We just started playing last month.

Linda's captivated by the miniatures and painting. Her army is full of mythical creatures (which takes up the entire "Points Cost" of the army) with their intricate paintjob, but it is so easy to win against her that I would feel bad if she cared at all.

Charlotte is captivated by the rules and the "lore", which was apparently made by a bunch of Myrmidians who were bored with just playing and wanted to add flavor to the game. None of that helped her very much with the actual war game, but she also didn't have any hard feelings about it.

Esme and I though. We've been getting really into it. My army is an Imperial one, led by a Grandmaster and his Knightly Order and accompanied by a coterie of Wizards. Esme's is Myrmidian, with a combination of warrior priests, foot soldiers for tarpitting, ranged units for thinning down lines, and deadly cavalry. It's been the most fun I've ever had, and I could see myself playing this game for months.

Oh, but I've gotten sidetracked. I was supposed to reveal embarrassing secrets. Uh. Esme pretends that she's all stoic and cool and cold like she's some dark novella protagonist, but she's actually super sweet. She's got a worn out teddy bear that looks like it's been through the ringer, sewed and patched together several times, that she calls "Mr. Cuddles". I don't think it's a source of embarrassment, but Esme does, such that it took her a while to give it over to Linda for sewing when it was damaged once. Esme also has a habit for giving cutesy or silly names to her miniatures. My favorite is "Sir Wax-a-lot III" on his mighty steed "Fluffymane".

So, that's about it. The last two exercises have led to one failed message and one successful one, and there's still Esme to go after me, so it's going to be a long day. It's been an enjoyable one though, and it's been some of the happiest days of my life to be spending time with people who I like and who like me.

Wish me luck!

AN: I wanted to give my own spin on Eike's time in the College. After ruminating on many different ways to do it, I ended up on this. I'm not fully satisfied with the premise and execution, but I did have a lot of fun writing it and I hope you had a fun time reading it. I think this one's different because it focuses on her friends more than it does Eike, but it also gives a lot of glimpses into her and her life in the College too.
 
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As a side note, part of why I enjoyed writing this so much is that ten years ago, when I was 13, I was not a girl. I don't know what it's like to be a 13 year old girl, although I'm a 23 year old woman right now, and my concerns and feelings were very different to Eike's. But it was very cathartic to put myself in her spot and imagine what it would have felt like to be a girl in her teenage years. It was nice.
 
That was really nice, great job @Codex. :)

One thing I wonder about now that you mention it is how romance works in the Grey College dormitories. I mean kids that age will have crushes and the College is trying to teach them to break some rules but not others. I imagine 'clandestine' trysts are really common with the magisters smiling behind their hands.
 
Kids will be kids. Mathilde mentions that the Grey Wind seems to have some capability to push earthly desires like companionship away, but that requires a far deeper dive into Ulgu than these kids would have at this point in their life, and even Mathilde whos pretty swamped in Ulgu has a girlfriend that she's intimate with. The Grey College is probably one of the more lenient ones, and I think Mathilde straight up mentioned teenagers messing around at some point? I can't remember when.

Mathilde was not involved in them I remember. Both Mathilde and Panoramia were very inexperienced going into their relationship. Not sure if it was their first ever serious romantic relationship, but it might be.
 
Kids will be kids. Mathilde mentions that the Grey Wind seems to have some capability to push earthly desires like companionship away, but that requires a far deeper dive into Ulgu than these kids would have at this point in their life, and even Mathilde whos pretty swamped in Ulgu has a girlfriend that she's intimate with. The Grey College is probably one of the more lenient ones, and I think Mathilde straight up mentioned teenagers messing around at some point? I can't remember when.

Mathilde was not involved in them I remember. Both Mathilde and Panoramia were very inexperienced going into their relationship. Not sure if it was their first ever serious romantic relationship, but it might be.

I think it was back during the early Pan courtship, the same update when she talked about spoon and Stirland he said that the courtship fads of the Grey apprentices would mean nothing to Panoramia. If memory serves she then ends up getting pushed into just talking to her by an exasperated Wolf
 
I think it was back during the early Pan courtship, the same update when she talked about spoon and Stirland he said that the courtship fads of the Grey apprentices would mean nothing to Panoramia. If memory serves she then ends up getting pushed into just talking to her by an exasperated Wolf
Partly. I remember something else other than this:
Your memory of how things are done in the Colleges are equally useless, as romantic fads amongst Apprentices would come and go on a regular basis and would rarely go beyond an individual College.
But I could just be imagining things. Whatever.

On another topic, this was what inspired the omake btw:
"Mathilde!" Eike exclaims as she finally notices you, and from the corner of your eye you notice the heads popping up and around furniture to take note of the visitor.
You look up, and you smile to yourself at how none of the other girls need to quickly look away, because they're already acting like they aren't eavesdropping. "If that's what you want to do," you say.
I thought to myself "what would the other apprentices who appeared here be like?" and that came out.
 
You may be remembering this:

The Grey College is officially secular, but it's also very clear on what forms of disobedience are taken extremely seriously, and very mildly rebelling against the College's secular nature with a Major God of the Empire isn't one of those things. There are shrines and books dedicated to all the Major Gods tucked away where the curious can find them, and rumours and gossip about them circulate through the Apprentices and somehow never seem to reach the ears of the Magisters. The older Apprentices often gravitate to the Shrines of Taal and Rhya, often in pairs, while the younger ones tend to become enamoured with the adventures of Ranald.
Those shrines do just so happen to be in private, quiet places where you can hear anyone approaching with plenty of warning. The average apprentice is in their late teens to early twenties, they can't leave the College grounds, and they don't have their own quarters, so they get up to what they get up to under the understanding eye of Taal and Rhya. The alternative would probably be somewhere in the stacks and that upsets the librarians.
 
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