We have accepted a new quest.
There is a new story to tell of Ranald and Saint Grey, a daring champion of his who most definitely was not completely outshined by the combined forces of the entire Kislevite Pantheon no sir, no madam Ranald and Saint Grey were the heroes this day
Up to the chaos wastes, rode we,
with the Crone
and the Widow
and the whole Kislev family
We made with all haste,
'top our shadowy steed
as the Crone did march North
at incredible speed
"what's the plan?", asked we
our target well known
as evil kitchenware
that'd best be made gone
A vicious smile, "You'll see"
to our heroes cracked the Crone
as the wrath of all Kislev
danced within her bones
She stomped 'cross the ground
quickly covered by snow
legs and lungs pumping
like divine bellows
Twas the rumble of thunder,
Twas the roaring of bears!
It was blizzards and ice shards
all shredding the air!
The harsh gaze of sunlight!
the screeching of hawks!
and us brought behind
just to handle the locks
"Behold!" cried the Crone
and the Widow as well
"Dasvadanya Kul bitches,
and witness your HELL!"
Some Kurgan did tremble
Some Kurgan did cry
The one thing they all did
was suffer and die
for Gospodar Vengeance
had come for them all
any sharing their name
with damned Asavar Kul
[dramatic space for audience to boo and hiss and spit]
And so slunk we heroes
'tween Kul screams of pain
as the first to pull heist
amidst divine bear-i-cane
we padded through shadow
and slipped through tent flap
we silenced foul daemon
with a gun fired, "splat"
we, guided through gauntlet
did gather foul goblet
summoned our steed
and prepared to leave on it
But the storm did seem stalled
spin in place, did the squall
if the Crone needed help
need we wait for a call?
"Kill the ice bitch!"
cried a Kurgan we saw.
The Protector did snarl
and pull out our claws
A pike sliced in twain
and a spawn into sixths!
This one was a battle
that we would not miss!
And as happens to battles
that occur too far north
a champion did come
to check it for worth
it surveyed the field
and saw many old enemy
and then saw the Saint
and chuckled dark levity
"Cat!" was it's cry
"Foul Magics you wield!
I'll be taking your champion's
skin for my shield!"
And he thought we'd turn tail,
so his attention did wander
an opportunity given
that we would not squander
Squared up to the Storm
of all of Kislev's might
The Brute cracked it's neck
it was eager to fight
It's faithful were dying
by bushel, by drove!
it made to bring aid,
and most of it dove!
But part of the brute
was pinned painf'ly in place
"What?!" roared the thing
confused look on it's face
Shocked was the brute!
a knife slammed in his back!?
"How?!" howled the beast
"You're a cowardly cat!"
Ranald then sneered up
at the towering beast
a fraction the thing
which his kinsman would beat
"A cat, yes, with claws
and something to prove
and a Saint who has gambled
whom I will not lose"
The shard roared with it's champion
and swung axe with abandon
both Saint and their Patron
matched blade and stayed standin'
"ROAGH" fury screamed
as both en'my lashed out
"Gah!" Saint and Cat
did take wounds in that bout
"HOW DARE YOU RESIST ME"
did foul evil screech
"YOU TRICK AND YOU TAKE
YOU ARE NAUGHT BUT A LEECH"
and Ranald did stagger
and blindly, Brute leapt
and did not once see
where Ranald's Knife was kept
"WHERE-" started them
that were swiftly cut off
as Ranald's own Knife
did carve Chaos a loss
"Now I may be a trickster
a thief and a gambler
and when I tell stories
I'm often a rambler
and once in the past
I did run, but no more!
I've sworn since then also
to be Protector!"
with the shard now defeated
he pounced down to the storm
his reception in Kislev?
surprisingly warm
his kin who had already
mauled burned and frozen
all who wished claim
to be the Brute's chosen
All except one
lock'd duelin Saint Grey
who was thinkin,
their luck might run out on this day
The Crone and The Widow
The Bear and The Sun
The Hawk and The Cat
grabbed that champion as one
They lifted it up
the ground itself quaked
"The Disciple of Our Kin
is not yours to break"
And so died the champion,
And so lived the Saint!
And so came we here,
with a story to paint!
For Ranald has been
Trickster
Gambler
and Rogue
For Ranald has been
too long
far from his home
A debt held for ages
fine'ly lain to rest
The Protector fine'ly
has his kin's respect
[to be performed at the Temple of Ranald at a Shrine to Ranald we place within made of the stolen weapons from the event in question]
