Yeah, that is not a code like the Jedi. Or even like the Sith.
The Jedi cleanly espouse the basic tenets of their religion, denying certain aspects of the self and the world to pursue the opposition (Emotion, Peace. Passion, Serenity. Chaos, Harmony etc.) culminating in a rejection of mortality itself, that you simply become one with the Force.
Concise, horrible, but concise.
The Sith's counter is a path to success. It begins by rejecting Peace, the first of the Jedi's commands (this fits with the Sith being forged to counter the Jedi, by former members). Then it's their path to power. Passion to Strength, which is how they channel the Dark Side. Strength in the Force becomes Power in whichever form they desire. Which they use to win at the goal they had set. Which breaks their limitations. And they are free because they are Force Sensitives who use the Dark Side.
A chain of victory, which is exactly what the Sith promise, and what they deliver although the true chain is very different it is still fundamentally a series of steps (a slippery staircase)
Compared to the Jed'aii Code above, which looks like a mashup.
There is no Ignorance, there is Knowledge. - the call to seek knowledge
There is no Fear; there is Power. - What? This is not an opposition. This can only work in a Green Lantern's code or someone else whose powerset is weakened by being afraid.
I am the Heart of the Force. - Kreia used this metaphorically to represent Revan's immense power in comparison to every other Force Sensitive. This doesn't belong in an in-verse Code
I am the revealing Fire of Light, I am the eternal Mystery of Darkness. - A nice poetic sound, but means nothing beyond 'balance between Light and Dark' Fire and Mystery do not go together, even if you call it Revealing Fire. Revealing Fire and Mysterious Shadow maybe? Either way, overly poetic compared to the relatively spartan Jedi and Sith (which uses No X, Y // X then Y. Y then Z)
In Balance with Chaos and Harmony, Immortal in the Force - Two points in one, pick one or split into two expanded lines. The first is just a repeat of the previous line while the second is the end of the Jedi Code but lacking in the 'capstone of philosophy' the prior two have.
Either way, fun read not actually a good in-verse Philosophy or all that similar to the previous 2.