There's a lot of things I want to say right now... I want to talk about omake and a bunch of other stuff...
But...
Right now...
All I can do is wish in vain for the update...
I...
...
...
Oh.
Shit... I'm tearing up right now.
This moving business is being... Pretty hard on me. It's almost entirely irrational fear -- I'm completely confident in my ability to adapt & excel in college, partly because I already have in some measure, partly for a bunch of other reasons. But I've never been so afraid of anything in my life and it's getting to me right now, really really hard.
I'm... Honestly not exaggerating, here. I... I don't get like this. At all. There was one time I was going to a chess tournament in a carpool with my team, the interstate was all iced up and we spun out in front of an oncoming semi. I... Wasn't really afraid. I tensed, entered flight/fight, but... I was functional. This... I'm just sitting here in this hotel room tearing up.
One of my coping mechanisms over the years has been to drown myself in upbeat or one-sided fiction. But, I've grown past (or simply set aside take your pick) the thing I used for a while -- one of SilentlyWatches works.
So I'm sitting here in this hotel room in the city I'm going to be going to college in, tearing up, wishing I had something,
anything I could read to just cheer myself up through immersion, and just kind of
despairing.
And I keep trying to get myself to do something to try to get my attention focused on something other than fear and, I've been reading a really cool romance/adventure over on ff.net all night, and I just can't take it anymore. I sit up on the bed, tearing up, things I could try to do flashing through my mind and then "I could post on BAHHSCQ about the omake" turns into "re-read BAHHSCQ."
So... I guess what I'm here to say before I start re-reading is, thank you
@Avalanche and
@LegacySC, because... I think because is obvious.
I... Just scrolled up to the top of this, I guess it isn't totally coherent... I don't really care right now.
Anna?
Please Halp.
Thanks in advance.