Lycanthromancer
The Arcane Fuzz
- Location
- USA
Out to catch the fabled chicken of the sea? The great Moby Delicious.
Ship of Fools: A Taylor Varga Omake (Complete)
- Thread starter Derek M
- Start date
- Crossover
- Location
- Maryland
Wikipedia has quotes from Jim Shooter, who was Marvel Comics editor-in-chief back during the first Secret Wars. They include:
Kenner had licensed the DC Heroes, and Mattel had He-Man, but wanted to hedge in case superheroes became the next big fad. They were interested in Marvel's characters, but only if we staged a publishing event that would get a lot of attention, and they could build a theme around. Fans, especially young fans often suggested to me "one big story with all the heroes and all the villains in it," so I proposed that. It flew. Mattel thought that kids responded well to the word "secret," so after a couple of working names bit the dust, we called the story "Marvel Super Heroes Secret Wars."
I was wondering why they called them, "Secret Wars," and now I know the answer was pretty much an attempt to sell toys.
- Location
- Amongst the ashes.
That's the way I interpreted the scene, mainly since I felt it was too vague for a Chekov's gun, and the story doesn't really need a gun - yet it was a bit vague for a cameo. And I felt the metaphor worked.
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KongouBongo
Always got to make time for tea-time!
- Location
- 26°9'1"N 121°22'57"E
Gods Secret Wars, thought I had obligated myself from that. The only thing I remember were the XMen fans upset that Spider-Man kicked their butts. The infinity Wars the less and the better.
- Location
- Austin, Texas
I just threw up in my mouth a little.
And please, none of us want to think of you wearing only socks.
meh...800 pound gorilla? Those little things are for chumps. We have an 800 foot tall lizard!
You know, I never thought of it...but you gotta point. Everyone wants to "improve" on a good story-base.
More often than not, doing extraordinary things...WHILE being shat upon from a great height...with little or no recognition at all.
- Location
- The general area. Possibly behind you.
Everyone knows that shitting on your savior and not thanking them builds character and keeps them humble! That's how you get them to be the savior! Dumbledore knows this
There's almost no risk of them going 'fuck all of you' and either giving up to become a proper villain, or deciding to deliberately screw it up and take all the other bastards with them. Right?
Right?
No, of course not. That's crazy talk. So remember to kick your hero when they're down to improve the service next time
Makes the inevitable movie deal that much nicer too!
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- Location
- Austin, Texas
Yeah, I kinda sprained and/or twisted something just reading it.
Now I gotta go find a MetaChiropractor to fix my sproing!
- Location
- Beyond the Unknowable Veil
No we don't! Our tallest lizards are only four hundred feet or eighty feet, depending on wether you mean the publicly known or the biggest confirmed lizard! Theoretical low-density mega-dragons need not apply!
FaerieKnight79
Verified Pixie
- Location
- The Internet
Marvel is at least better about having continuity that matters then DC. DC has been rebooting everything every 10 years or so ever since the first Crisis on Infinite Earths storyline. And their justifications for such can be rather lame. Flashpoint for example (the reboot that started the New 52 continuity which was mostly hated) came about because Flash decided to go back in time to save someone's life even though he'd already known that was a Really Bad Idea. Marvel on the other hand mostly doesn't mess with their actual continuity much. As an example, when they realized that various writers for X-Men and Wolverine had given a multitude of conflicting origins for the character Marvel came up with a story line to explain why he has these conflicting origin stories. This arc didn't actually invalidate any of Wolverine's actions throughout the comic, just cast doubt onto his memories. But various things like him fighting in WW2 are backed up by others remembering him doing these things. This 'retcon' has been refined over time, but his actual origin as told in the original 6 issue Wolverine Origins mini-series again doesn't invalidate anything.
Other reboots Marvel did such as the Rebirth thing they did after Onslaught to relaunch various comics from the beginning initially appeared to be a reboot. Only for it to eventually be revealed that those titles hadn't actually been rebooted, the main characters (the F4 for instance) had just been sent to Counter-Earth (which has long been a thing) with their memories of their superhero careers erased. Other 'reboots' were never billed as such. They were actually billed as alternate timelines, such as the Ultimate line. You know, Ultimate X-Men, Ultimate Spiderman, Ultimates, and the like.
The recent arc involving various Earths from the multiverse colliding that lead up to the latest Secret Wars and a reboot was the first actual reboot Marvel has done, to my knowledge.
EDIT
"What does that make us?"
Other reboots Marvel did such as the Rebirth thing they did after Onslaught to relaunch various comics from the beginning initially appeared to be a reboot. Only for it to eventually be revealed that those titles hadn't actually been rebooted, the main characters (the F4 for instance) had just been sent to Counter-Earth (which has long been a thing) with their memories of their superhero careers erased. Other 'reboots' were never billed as such. They were actually billed as alternate timelines, such as the Ultimate line. You know, Ultimate X-Men, Ultimate Spiderman, Ultimates, and the like.
The recent arc involving various Earths from the multiverse colliding that lead up to the latest Secret Wars and a reboot was the first actual reboot Marvel has done, to my knowledge.
EDIT
"What does that make us?"
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- Location
- Austin, Texas
Not necessarily.
A design that calls for (just snow-balling a number here) 1-inch steel plating (or 1/4-inch titanium/whatever) could be replaced with one that is 1/4-millimeter EDM...and be the same (or even less, perhaps) weight, for a given strength.
I don't remember T/V going into how strong a given thickness of EDM is, but a paper-thin layer of EDM should be as strong as your average hull-plating material at normal thickness, right?
And will want at least one of them to be stuffed full of Twinkies
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JoshuaSweetvale
Insectovore
- Location
- NL, 65 Million Years Ago
It's more disgust and revulsion than anything else. Quite a few stories, be they fanworks or original content, are so drenched in misanthropy that they're just offensive to my sensibilities.
Whenever I read a story where the author is clearly futzing the dice of fate for maximum bullshit, I get the urge to write in some space cops with Reality Anchors (SCP Foundation/Necron anti-magic)
As an example, One More Day, ME3's ending and Life is Strange's ending all seemingly have people just shrugging and giving into a maltheist god crushing them under their boot.
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Isnt my realname
This isn't my real name.
- Location
- Not Here
A
Angry. And confused.
- Location
- Maryland
The funny part about that quote from Spaceballs is that your father's brother's nephew could be you, if you're male, or one of your cousins. In which case your cousin's cousin could be you. Dark Helmet could be claiming to be Lone Starr's roommate. Maybe he hates him because Lone Starr doesn't remember him despite living in the same residence at some point in the past...
So, like Reed Richards and Victor Von Doom? 8)
FaerieKnight79
Verified Pixie
- Location
- The Internet
The implication from the quote was that being the roommate of a relative of Lone Starr's was the only connection between them. And that the two had never met before. Watching the clip again makes this absolutely clear.
They never met before that scene. And while Helmet had known a relative of Lone Starr, this had zero impact on his relationship with Lone Starr himself.
Chapter 17: Refitting and Fitting In
- Location
- Maryland
Chapter 17: Refitting and Fitting In
"So let me get this straight," said O'Brien with a skeptical look. "The Romulans cloned Jean-Luc Picard, and that clone is going to lead a coup to take over the Empire and start a war with the Federation?"
Miles was running a diagnostic in the engine room while discussing the possible future of his reality with Metis and Kevin. It was slightly amusing how interested the lizard and the human engineer were in his work, as it was literally one of the most mundane parts of his job back home.
"That's what the last feature film about your time period suggests," said Metis. "Admittedly, it isn't the best film in the series."
"Then the Tal Shiar is going to accidentally trigger an Iconian super-weapon that causes the star of the Hobus system to go supernova, and that supernova is going to somehow propagate through subspace and destroy Romulus?" continued the incredulous Starfleet NCO.
"That's the backstory that they come up with for the online game," explained Kevin. "It makes more sense than the reboot films, at least."
Miles stared at the lizard and the human for a moment, then asked, "What exactly do you expect me to do about any of that? It's not like I can just send a message to the Romulans. They're not going to believe a Starfleet officer, and if the information is correct, then they're going to want to know where it came from."
"We don't expect you to fix anything, Chief O'Brien," answered Metis. "We would appreciate it if you would introduce us to Captain Picard and Lieutenant Commander Data. Our hope is that the Captain can help us get in touch with Ambassador Spock, as well."
Miles thought about that. "I guess I can do that. I'm not sure you'll be able to convince them, though."
"Don't forget," said Kevin, "you're going to have the Ship of Fools with you for Starfleet R&D. We can also give you copies of the movies and shows. There's enough secret information in there that they should be able to verify at least some of it is accurate."
"There are actually a number of highly sensitive bits of information referenced," said Metis. "I expect that anything we provide is going to be locked away as need-to-know information. Starfleet Command, Starfleet Intelligence, the Department of Temporal Investigations and Section 31 are all going to want to see that information classified."
The fact that Metis knew about Section 31 made O'Brien suspect that she was right about how sensitive some of the information was likely to be. He wondered if maybe he wouldn't be better off if he didn't look at any of it. This was starting to sound like something above his pay grade. "My suggestion would be that we run this all by Jean-Luc and Data...and Ambassador Spock, if we can, before talking to anybody else. I also would suggest bringing in Julian Bashir. Between the four of them, I can't think of four people I would trust more to do what was in the best interest of the Federation." He would have suggested Captain Sisko if he had still been available, as well.
"We may also want to obscure your role in this," suggested Metis. "We would not want you to be abducted by Section 31, or any of their counterparts in the other galactic powers."
"What about Q?" asked Kevin. "I mean, there are a lot of super-powerful beings in the Star Trek universe, but Q is the one who keeps popping up and taking an interest in the Enterprise and DS9."
"The answer to that question," said Metis, "is going to depend in part on how Q reacts to the Family. Hopefully, our presence will be enough to distract him from the Chief."
Miles thought that if a propensity to cause chaos was any basis, then Q and the Family would get along famously. Watching them interfere would make Q as happy as Larry, as his granda used to say. "Q always seemed more interested in Captain Picard than in anyone else," he said.
"The Family have a way of drawing the attention of powerful people," said Kevin, remembering how Legend showed up during Kaiju's introduction, and the follow-on visit by the Triumvirate.
"Q isn't people," said O'Brien. "What I mean is that one of the first things they teach you in Starfleet is not to assume an alien mind is going to think the way that you do. Even I've made that mistake before." O'Brien thought back with a shudder to a particular incident with a female Cardassian engineer.
"That may be a source for some of the discrepancies in our stories from your world, actually," suggested Metis. "The way a human tells a story about a non-human may skew the details because they don't understand the perspective." Talking to Varga for any length of time made it clear that if nothing else, his long history and experience with the best and worst of humanity gave him a degree of alien practicality alongside some distinctly non-linear thinking.
"Starfleet historical logs are usually annotated based on the species and culture of the officer recording them for just that reason," added Miles.
"The stories here about your universe almost certainly gloss over some of the details required for actually governing a group of different cultures and species," said Metis. "That is precisely why we should gain the trust of Miles's friends and colleagues. It will help us avoid misunderstandings."
"They don't have any phobias about giant lizards, do they?" joked Kevin.
Miles gave a chuckle. "You folks are positively warm and fuzzy compared to the Tholians or the Sheliak. You're more likely to have trouble getting Julian to stop pestering you with questions."
"Warm and fuzzy...oooh! We could bring back a tribble," said Kevin excitedly.
Miles stared at the eager fanboy, wondering yet again how he could be so brilliant and so crazy at the same time.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
"This is your day job?" asked Xander as he looked over the forklift that Linda was overhauling with a professional eye.
From beneath the engine cover, she replied, "Yep. The DWU pays me to maintain their equipment...bulldozers, forklifts, trucks...whatever they have in stock. Some of it was long overdue for maintenance because work was scarce for a while. The union also used to have a lot more people."
"I'm surprised you're not just using those mechs instead of forklifts," said Xander.
Linda stood up and went to get a different tool from the bench. "We probably will, eventually, but we don't have enough to cover every job, and even when we do, the existing equipment needs to be maintained. These guys are pretty stubborn about using equipment until it wears out."
Xander nodded his head in agreement. "I've worked with bosses like that. Some folks are just frugal from past experience. They can still run a good site. You want to stay away from the ones who are just cheap, though, because they're the ones who cut corners."
In her head, Linda wondered what Xander would say about her working conditions back with the Merchants. Out loud, she said, "DWU is really strict about OSHA standards. You should ask Danny to show you the video of Kaiju moving the ship. It's pretty fucking funny." She had been drugged up when it happened, but she had seen the videos after the fact. The giant hardhat and safety buoys were hysterically funny.
"The lizards seem like good people," he ventured casually.
Linda looked at him flatly. "They are. I wouldn't be here in more ways than one without Metis."
"So, nothing weird going on behind the scenes?" he asked. Xander had seen more than one normal-seeming situation back in Sunnydale turn into something sinister.
To his surprise, Linda laughed out loud at that question. "Kid, this is Brockton Bay. There's weird shit going on behind the scenes, in front of the scenes...hell, the scenes themselves are weird. The lizards are the weirdest ones of all. Don't mean they ain't good people. Don't let the teeth fool you."
"I'm sure they're just cuddly teddy bears," said Xander. He was taking turns covering each of his eyes and looking at the tool rack, simply enjoying the joys of perfect binary vision.
"If you're stupid enough to threaten somebody they care about then they'll take you out, no question. The Merchants tried to throw their weight around on the Docks. The Family stole all their money as a warning, and when they were too fucked up to listen, they took them down in one night," said Linda.
"The Merchants?" asked Xander. The name sounded vaguely familiar from passing conversations.
"The local gang of drug dealers. They used to do shit like kidnap people and forcibly addict them." '...and I used to be part of it,' she thought to herself. "Most of them are in prison, in rehab, or run away now." The primary exception, unfortunately, was Skidmark.
Xander didn't really have a problem with taking down drug dealers, especially if they were the kind of scum Linda was describing. The Watchers back home had been pretty hands-off about normal street crime, but that was because there were plenty of things going bump in the night that needed a slayer's attention without worrying about the local street gangs. Even the mystical-related crimes weren't that big a focus unless people were dying from it. Suck houses ran off of repeat business, so a vampire working there wasn't killing in the streets. This world was obviously different. Around here, everybody was playing cops and robbers with actual superpowers, so normal crooks wouldn't get a pass.
"You know, with your skills, we could easily find a place for you here. We can always use folks with construction backgrounds, and you could work with the security team as well," said Linda after a minute or so of silence. Brian Laborn had got a very similar deal, and it didn't take a genius to figure out that he had a "special" background.
"Thanks for the offer," he said with an honest smile, "but I have friends waiting for me back home. There are also some things I need to tell people." Having an honest conversation with Anya was on his personal list. Her death on the TV show had been...difficult to watch. It could easily have happened that way. He also had no problem believing Angel could be self-centered and idiotic enough to destroy everyone around him, send L.A. to hell, and ultimately end magic itself. Cordelia and Wesley didn't deserve their fates. Even Fred and Gunn, whom he had never met, deserved better. On a side note, he did have to give props to the actress playing Cordelia -- she got the attitude (and the rack) spot on.
A lot of the comic book stuff from after the TV show was...very, very weird. Honestly, though, he couldn't afford to assume that it was wrong. When your hometown was created so an evil warlock could ascend to a demon and your high school paper had an obituary, it wasn't such a stretch to think that Dawn could turn into a giant, or that the new Council could be attacked by Japanese vampires. He wasn't sure he could see himself having a kid with Dawn, especially with Anya still being alive. He also wasn't sure his universe was weird enough that Spike would show up with an honest-to-god spaceship, but then, wasn't that what he himself was going to do? It wasn't that long ago that they had had to deal with a snot monster from outer space, after all.
"Don't be surprised if a lot of your problems end up being handled by the time Saurial and the others are done. They have a habit of fixing stuff. Sometimes they fix stuff that nobody knew was broken," added Linda.
"Honestly, just having the squeakers and a half-ton of precious metal will fix a lot of problems," he replied.
Linda laughed. "You know that that's like, the bare minimum of what's going to happen? That deal was just so everybody would accept the help. A lot of people won't trust help unless it comes with a catch, you know?"
Xander thought back to his father, may his soul rest wherever it ended up. "Yeah, I know the type," he said thoughtfully.
Linda went back to work. She could tell when somebody was thinking about stuff they didn't want to discuss.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Danny had taken a break to check in with his daughter. Saurial was in the back of the BBFO office, creating some of the necessary components for the refit of the Ship of Fools. Her mass replication technique was very useful for creating, for example, a hundred examples of the same flywheel assembly. Things like hull plates could just be created en masse.
"I didn't know you needed so many power units?" asked Danny as came over to watch.
"We made some changes to the plans based on feedback from the crew," explained Saurial.
"Anything I should worry about?" he asked, wondering what new craziness they had invented.
Saurial smiled and shook her head. "Nothing crazy, just changes. Most people won't care as long as the ship works and gets them where they need to go. There's no reason to nitpick over the details."
He chuckled. "Just don't post them on PHO."
She looked at him askance. "What, do you think I'm crazy?" The idea of somebody like Void Cowboy arguing about the details of an actual spaceship was nightmare-inducing.
"Have you planned out the trips, yet?" he asked, curious.
Saurial hemmed and hummed to herself for a few seconds before answering. "We haven't got a full sequence, and we'll likely want multiple trips with at least one scouting mission first. Daniel's and Peter's universes are at the top of the list for early visits, though."
Danny considered what he knew about the Stargate and Marvel universes. "Any particular reason why?"
"Technology and magic," answered his scaly daughter. "Both universes have potential allies that could help us with some of the harder cases."
He considered the crew members. "You're concerned about Harry and Ellen?"
She nodded. "Them, and Taylor to a lesser extent. Not that everybody doesn't have their issues."
"Isn't going to Daniel's universe going to be dangerous for him?" asked Danny. He had heard the story about how Danny was about to face punishment as he was yanked away unexpectedly. The, "Ascended Ancients," in that universe were vindictive.
Saurial gave one of her toothy grins that somehow seemed to have more teeth than should have technically fit into her mouth. "Oh, don't worry about them."
"You have plans?" asked Danny, his mouth quirking into a grin.
"We'll bring back a video to show you," answered his daughter. She paused before asking more seriously, "Will you go with us when we bring Taylor back?"
"Of course," he answered immediately. "You know I would do anything for you, and Taylor is pretty much you shifted over by a few realities. What do you need me to do?"
"I want your help dealing with Taylor's father. They didn't part on the best of terms...and I don't know that he ever really got over mom's death," she said sadly.
Danny thought back to his behavior pre-Varga with no small amount of shame. He had stopped being a good father to his daughter. Ironically, it was the Barnes family who both took care of Taylor immediately after his wife's death, and also were ultimately responsible for what happened to both versions of Taylor. He tried to imagine what his reaction would be if Taylor had just disappeared into a life as a super-villain. The picture wasn't a pleasant one.
"I'll help. You may have to deal with the Protectorate, though. She was a villain in her world," he reminder her.
"We know. We haven't made a full plan yet, but Varga has some ideas," she answered. "We also need to deal with New Wave."
"How so?" he queried.
"Amy in that universe never developed any healthy outlets for her power, and she probably never improved her toxic relationship with her mother," explained Saurial. "On top of that, her first meeting with Taylor and Lisa involved violence and emotional blackmail. That Amy is not Taylor's biggest fan."
"Oh dear," said Danny. He thought about the amusing and very intelligent girl that he knew, and thought about what kinds of problems could come from her being trapped in that kind of environment. If you add in what her power was actually capable of doing, you could very easy come up with an apocalyptic scenario. "I'm a little surprised her world is still standing."
"Based on what she's told us, we think it's only a matter of time before something drastic happens to the world as a whole. Society already seems to be spiraling down the drain," said Saurial. "We're hoping that leaving her universe until last will let us find fictional references in other realities before we get there."
Danny smiled at that thought. "You think that you're a fictional character in another reality?"
His daughter laughed. "According to Amy, I'm already a fictional character on PHO."
His smile turned into a grimace. "I wouldn't know. I'm not ready to read those kinds of things about my daughter."
Saurial's laugh turned into a merrier, giggle. "Don't worry. Nothing out there is anywhere near the truth."
"There is that one guy on PHO who keeps claiming you're a demon," said Danny jokingly.
"He also claims we're trying to take over the world, and you know I would never do that deliberately," she said with fake outrage.
He nodded sagely. "I'm sure it will be completely inadvertent when it happens."
"Damn straight," she said with a firm nod.
He looked at his watch and noticed it was near lunch. "I'm going to run over to the cafeteria and grab something to eat. Do you want anything?"
"I'll go with you. I can finish this off later," she answered.
With that, the mammalian father and reptilian daughter wandered off to see what was good to eat.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Amy and Taylor were eating lunch at a Thai restaurant. It was where Amy and Saurial had first really become friends after their initial unfortunate meeting in the closet at Arcadia. Taylor agreed that the food was quite good, though she was surprised at how crowded it was. They had had reservations, and still had had to wait ten minutes for a table. The two girls were sharing an order of larb gai as they spoke.
"So, your Amy was able to sense and even interfere with your communication with your insects?" asked Amy with interest.
Taylor took a bite from her leaf full of chicken and nodded. "It was like getting static on a radio channel, sort of..."
"Can you access your power so I can see if I can do the same?" asked the healer.
Taylor put her hand out on the table and replied, "Go ahead." She was getting used to thinking of Amy as, if not a friend yet, at least somebody non-hostile.
Amy put a finger on Taylor's wrist like she was checking her pulse. Her eyes focused on nothing for a moment. "Oh," she said, "I can feel that. That's interesting. You can feel and control every insect nearby?"
"Yep, I can. I can even see and hear through them, but bug senses are kind of crap," said Taylor.
"Hmm," hummed Amy. "I might be able to help with that."
"You can affect powers?" said Taylor. Amy hadn't hinted at anything like that in either world.
Amy shook her head. "No...well, probably not. It would also probably mean fiddling with brains, which is not something I feel comfortable doing."
"No offense," said Taylor, "but I don't think I would feel comfortable having my brain fiddled with."
"None taken," said Amy. "I can't affect powers but I can affect bugs."
Taylor thought about that. Given her alter-ego, it was quite evident that Amy was an extremely capable biotinker. Compared to Ianthe, creating a new bug would be child's play. "You think you could create a bug with better senses? Ones that are easier to interpret?"
Amy could sense that her power, which had already been ridiculously happy recently, was intrigued at the thought of creating something else entirely new and different. "I know I can do that," she answered. "In fact, we could create stinging insects with chemicals similar to the ones Ianthe uses on her arm darts. We might even...hmm...yeah... How would you like a beetle that could serve as a relay for your power, so you could potentially have a range covering the whole city?"
Taylor just stared for a moment. "You can really do all that?" she asked. Then after a thought, she added, "You do know I'm a villain, right?"
Amy looked at her skeptically. "I know you didn't want to be, and the fact that you felt the need to point that out right after I offered suggests that you're not as bad as you think you are."
Taylor and Amy both fell silent for a minute while the staff of the restaurant brought out their entrees. Saurial, Varga, and her dad had all told her that she was too critical of herself. This Danny Hebert had been particularly adamant in pointing out all the ways that the authority figures in her life had failed her. He had been somewhat vicious in including himself in that list. Varga had made the point that teenagers weren't expected to make life-and-death decisions for a very good reason, and that he suspected powers made things worse when it came to making good ones. Now Amy Dallon was sitting across the table from her, treating her as if she were a hero...even if she didn't feel like one. She thought that life would be so much easier if she could just change her own feelings through the application of brute force logic.
"You know," continued Amy after the servers left the table, "being around Taylor and Varga tends to have an effect on people beyond what you would expect. My mother has become more tolerant. Vicky has become more careful and thoughtful. Lisa isn't quite so abrasive with her need to show she's the smartest one in the room. Even Rachel seems to have calmed down and accepted that she isn't the alpha around here. Maybe if you spend enough time hanging around here, you can learn not to be so hard on yourself."
"Did you add mind-reading to your powers?" asked Taylor, surprised at the girl's insight.
Amy laughed. "No, mind readers don't exist."
"They do in Peter's and Jimmy's worlds," said Taylor.
Amy paused her laugh. "Really? Well, that's going to be interesting to see. Peter's world is the one where a lot of the powers have a genetic basis, right?"
Taylor started to answer, then paused to think about what a biotinker could do with a gene for telepathy. Instead of answering, she asked, "Do you have any other ideas for new bugs?"
The girl across the table smirked, obviously not missing the blatant change of topic. Rather than argue the point, she said, "How about a beetle big enough that you can ride it?"
Taylor's fork stopped halfway to her mouth and her face took on a considering look. This was proving to be a very interesting lunch conversation, indeed.
"So let me get this straight," said O'Brien with a skeptical look. "The Romulans cloned Jean-Luc Picard, and that clone is going to lead a coup to take over the Empire and start a war with the Federation?"
Miles was running a diagnostic in the engine room while discussing the possible future of his reality with Metis and Kevin. It was slightly amusing how interested the lizard and the human engineer were in his work, as it was literally one of the most mundane parts of his job back home.
"That's what the last feature film about your time period suggests," said Metis. "Admittedly, it isn't the best film in the series."
"Then the Tal Shiar is going to accidentally trigger an Iconian super-weapon that causes the star of the Hobus system to go supernova, and that supernova is going to somehow propagate through subspace and destroy Romulus?" continued the incredulous Starfleet NCO.
"That's the backstory that they come up with for the online game," explained Kevin. "It makes more sense than the reboot films, at least."
Miles stared at the lizard and the human for a moment, then asked, "What exactly do you expect me to do about any of that? It's not like I can just send a message to the Romulans. They're not going to believe a Starfleet officer, and if the information is correct, then they're going to want to know where it came from."
"We don't expect you to fix anything, Chief O'Brien," answered Metis. "We would appreciate it if you would introduce us to Captain Picard and Lieutenant Commander Data. Our hope is that the Captain can help us get in touch with Ambassador Spock, as well."
Miles thought about that. "I guess I can do that. I'm not sure you'll be able to convince them, though."
"Don't forget," said Kevin, "you're going to have the Ship of Fools with you for Starfleet R&D. We can also give you copies of the movies and shows. There's enough secret information in there that they should be able to verify at least some of it is accurate."
"There are actually a number of highly sensitive bits of information referenced," said Metis. "I expect that anything we provide is going to be locked away as need-to-know information. Starfleet Command, Starfleet Intelligence, the Department of Temporal Investigations and Section 31 are all going to want to see that information classified."
The fact that Metis knew about Section 31 made O'Brien suspect that she was right about how sensitive some of the information was likely to be. He wondered if maybe he wouldn't be better off if he didn't look at any of it. This was starting to sound like something above his pay grade. "My suggestion would be that we run this all by Jean-Luc and Data...and Ambassador Spock, if we can, before talking to anybody else. I also would suggest bringing in Julian Bashir. Between the four of them, I can't think of four people I would trust more to do what was in the best interest of the Federation." He would have suggested Captain Sisko if he had still been available, as well.
"We may also want to obscure your role in this," suggested Metis. "We would not want you to be abducted by Section 31, or any of their counterparts in the other galactic powers."
"What about Q?" asked Kevin. "I mean, there are a lot of super-powerful beings in the Star Trek universe, but Q is the one who keeps popping up and taking an interest in the Enterprise and DS9."
"The answer to that question," said Metis, "is going to depend in part on how Q reacts to the Family. Hopefully, our presence will be enough to distract him from the Chief."
Miles thought that if a propensity to cause chaos was any basis, then Q and the Family would get along famously. Watching them interfere would make Q as happy as Larry, as his granda used to say. "Q always seemed more interested in Captain Picard than in anyone else," he said.
"The Family have a way of drawing the attention of powerful people," said Kevin, remembering how Legend showed up during Kaiju's introduction, and the follow-on visit by the Triumvirate.
"Q isn't people," said O'Brien. "What I mean is that one of the first things they teach you in Starfleet is not to assume an alien mind is going to think the way that you do. Even I've made that mistake before." O'Brien thought back with a shudder to a particular incident with a female Cardassian engineer.
"That may be a source for some of the discrepancies in our stories from your world, actually," suggested Metis. "The way a human tells a story about a non-human may skew the details because they don't understand the perspective." Talking to Varga for any length of time made it clear that if nothing else, his long history and experience with the best and worst of humanity gave him a degree of alien practicality alongside some distinctly non-linear thinking.
"Starfleet historical logs are usually annotated based on the species and culture of the officer recording them for just that reason," added Miles.
"The stories here about your universe almost certainly gloss over some of the details required for actually governing a group of different cultures and species," said Metis. "That is precisely why we should gain the trust of Miles's friends and colleagues. It will help us avoid misunderstandings."
"They don't have any phobias about giant lizards, do they?" joked Kevin.
Miles gave a chuckle. "You folks are positively warm and fuzzy compared to the Tholians or the Sheliak. You're more likely to have trouble getting Julian to stop pestering you with questions."
"Warm and fuzzy...oooh! We could bring back a tribble," said Kevin excitedly.
Miles stared at the eager fanboy, wondering yet again how he could be so brilliant and so crazy at the same time.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
"This is your day job?" asked Xander as he looked over the forklift that Linda was overhauling with a professional eye.
From beneath the engine cover, she replied, "Yep. The DWU pays me to maintain their equipment...bulldozers, forklifts, trucks...whatever they have in stock. Some of it was long overdue for maintenance because work was scarce for a while. The union also used to have a lot more people."
"I'm surprised you're not just using those mechs instead of forklifts," said Xander.
Linda stood up and went to get a different tool from the bench. "We probably will, eventually, but we don't have enough to cover every job, and even when we do, the existing equipment needs to be maintained. These guys are pretty stubborn about using equipment until it wears out."
Xander nodded his head in agreement. "I've worked with bosses like that. Some folks are just frugal from past experience. They can still run a good site. You want to stay away from the ones who are just cheap, though, because they're the ones who cut corners."
In her head, Linda wondered what Xander would say about her working conditions back with the Merchants. Out loud, she said, "DWU is really strict about OSHA standards. You should ask Danny to show you the video of Kaiju moving the ship. It's pretty fucking funny." She had been drugged up when it happened, but she had seen the videos after the fact. The giant hardhat and safety buoys were hysterically funny.
"The lizards seem like good people," he ventured casually.
Linda looked at him flatly. "They are. I wouldn't be here in more ways than one without Metis."
"So, nothing weird going on behind the scenes?" he asked. Xander had seen more than one normal-seeming situation back in Sunnydale turn into something sinister.
To his surprise, Linda laughed out loud at that question. "Kid, this is Brockton Bay. There's weird shit going on behind the scenes, in front of the scenes...hell, the scenes themselves are weird. The lizards are the weirdest ones of all. Don't mean they ain't good people. Don't let the teeth fool you."
"I'm sure they're just cuddly teddy bears," said Xander. He was taking turns covering each of his eyes and looking at the tool rack, simply enjoying the joys of perfect binary vision.
"If you're stupid enough to threaten somebody they care about then they'll take you out, no question. The Merchants tried to throw their weight around on the Docks. The Family stole all their money as a warning, and when they were too fucked up to listen, they took them down in one night," said Linda.
"The Merchants?" asked Xander. The name sounded vaguely familiar from passing conversations.
"The local gang of drug dealers. They used to do shit like kidnap people and forcibly addict them." '...and I used to be part of it,' she thought to herself. "Most of them are in prison, in rehab, or run away now." The primary exception, unfortunately, was Skidmark.
Xander didn't really have a problem with taking down drug dealers, especially if they were the kind of scum Linda was describing. The Watchers back home had been pretty hands-off about normal street crime, but that was because there were plenty of things going bump in the night that needed a slayer's attention without worrying about the local street gangs. Even the mystical-related crimes weren't that big a focus unless people were dying from it. Suck houses ran off of repeat business, so a vampire working there wasn't killing in the streets. This world was obviously different. Around here, everybody was playing cops and robbers with actual superpowers, so normal crooks wouldn't get a pass.
"You know, with your skills, we could easily find a place for you here. We can always use folks with construction backgrounds, and you could work with the security team as well," said Linda after a minute or so of silence. Brian Laborn had got a very similar deal, and it didn't take a genius to figure out that he had a "special" background.
"Thanks for the offer," he said with an honest smile, "but I have friends waiting for me back home. There are also some things I need to tell people." Having an honest conversation with Anya was on his personal list. Her death on the TV show had been...difficult to watch. It could easily have happened that way. He also had no problem believing Angel could be self-centered and idiotic enough to destroy everyone around him, send L.A. to hell, and ultimately end magic itself. Cordelia and Wesley didn't deserve their fates. Even Fred and Gunn, whom he had never met, deserved better. On a side note, he did have to give props to the actress playing Cordelia -- she got the attitude (and the rack) spot on.
A lot of the comic book stuff from after the TV show was...very, very weird. Honestly, though, he couldn't afford to assume that it was wrong. When your hometown was created so an evil warlock could ascend to a demon and your high school paper had an obituary, it wasn't such a stretch to think that Dawn could turn into a giant, or that the new Council could be attacked by Japanese vampires. He wasn't sure he could see himself having a kid with Dawn, especially with Anya still being alive. He also wasn't sure his universe was weird enough that Spike would show up with an honest-to-god spaceship, but then, wasn't that what he himself was going to do? It wasn't that long ago that they had had to deal with a snot monster from outer space, after all.
"Don't be surprised if a lot of your problems end up being handled by the time Saurial and the others are done. They have a habit of fixing stuff. Sometimes they fix stuff that nobody knew was broken," added Linda.
"Honestly, just having the squeakers and a half-ton of precious metal will fix a lot of problems," he replied.
Linda laughed. "You know that that's like, the bare minimum of what's going to happen? That deal was just so everybody would accept the help. A lot of people won't trust help unless it comes with a catch, you know?"
Xander thought back to his father, may his soul rest wherever it ended up. "Yeah, I know the type," he said thoughtfully.
Linda went back to work. She could tell when somebody was thinking about stuff they didn't want to discuss.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Danny had taken a break to check in with his daughter. Saurial was in the back of the BBFO office, creating some of the necessary components for the refit of the Ship of Fools. Her mass replication technique was very useful for creating, for example, a hundred examples of the same flywheel assembly. Things like hull plates could just be created en masse.
"I didn't know you needed so many power units?" asked Danny as came over to watch.
"We made some changes to the plans based on feedback from the crew," explained Saurial.
"Anything I should worry about?" he asked, wondering what new craziness they had invented.
Saurial smiled and shook her head. "Nothing crazy, just changes. Most people won't care as long as the ship works and gets them where they need to go. There's no reason to nitpick over the details."
He chuckled. "Just don't post them on PHO."
She looked at him askance. "What, do you think I'm crazy?" The idea of somebody like Void Cowboy arguing about the details of an actual spaceship was nightmare-inducing.
"Have you planned out the trips, yet?" he asked, curious.
Saurial hemmed and hummed to herself for a few seconds before answering. "We haven't got a full sequence, and we'll likely want multiple trips with at least one scouting mission first. Daniel's and Peter's universes are at the top of the list for early visits, though."
Danny considered what he knew about the Stargate and Marvel universes. "Any particular reason why?"
"Technology and magic," answered his scaly daughter. "Both universes have potential allies that could help us with some of the harder cases."
He considered the crew members. "You're concerned about Harry and Ellen?"
She nodded. "Them, and Taylor to a lesser extent. Not that everybody doesn't have their issues."
"Isn't going to Daniel's universe going to be dangerous for him?" asked Danny. He had heard the story about how Danny was about to face punishment as he was yanked away unexpectedly. The, "Ascended Ancients," in that universe were vindictive.
Saurial gave one of her toothy grins that somehow seemed to have more teeth than should have technically fit into her mouth. "Oh, don't worry about them."
"You have plans?" asked Danny, his mouth quirking into a grin.
"We'll bring back a video to show you," answered his daughter. She paused before asking more seriously, "Will you go with us when we bring Taylor back?"
"Of course," he answered immediately. "You know I would do anything for you, and Taylor is pretty much you shifted over by a few realities. What do you need me to do?"
"I want your help dealing with Taylor's father. They didn't part on the best of terms...and I don't know that he ever really got over mom's death," she said sadly.
Danny thought back to his behavior pre-Varga with no small amount of shame. He had stopped being a good father to his daughter. Ironically, it was the Barnes family who both took care of Taylor immediately after his wife's death, and also were ultimately responsible for what happened to both versions of Taylor. He tried to imagine what his reaction would be if Taylor had just disappeared into a life as a super-villain. The picture wasn't a pleasant one.
"I'll help. You may have to deal with the Protectorate, though. She was a villain in her world," he reminder her.
"We know. We haven't made a full plan yet, but Varga has some ideas," she answered. "We also need to deal with New Wave."
"How so?" he queried.
"Amy in that universe never developed any healthy outlets for her power, and she probably never improved her toxic relationship with her mother," explained Saurial. "On top of that, her first meeting with Taylor and Lisa involved violence and emotional blackmail. That Amy is not Taylor's biggest fan."
"Oh dear," said Danny. He thought about the amusing and very intelligent girl that he knew, and thought about what kinds of problems could come from her being trapped in that kind of environment. If you add in what her power was actually capable of doing, you could very easy come up with an apocalyptic scenario. "I'm a little surprised her world is still standing."
"Based on what she's told us, we think it's only a matter of time before something drastic happens to the world as a whole. Society already seems to be spiraling down the drain," said Saurial. "We're hoping that leaving her universe until last will let us find fictional references in other realities before we get there."
Danny smiled at that thought. "You think that you're a fictional character in another reality?"
His daughter laughed. "According to Amy, I'm already a fictional character on PHO."
His smile turned into a grimace. "I wouldn't know. I'm not ready to read those kinds of things about my daughter."
Saurial's laugh turned into a merrier, giggle. "Don't worry. Nothing out there is anywhere near the truth."
"There is that one guy on PHO who keeps claiming you're a demon," said Danny jokingly.
"He also claims we're trying to take over the world, and you know I would never do that deliberately," she said with fake outrage.
He nodded sagely. "I'm sure it will be completely inadvertent when it happens."
"Damn straight," she said with a firm nod.
He looked at his watch and noticed it was near lunch. "I'm going to run over to the cafeteria and grab something to eat. Do you want anything?"
"I'll go with you. I can finish this off later," she answered.
With that, the mammalian father and reptilian daughter wandered off to see what was good to eat.
=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
Amy and Taylor were eating lunch at a Thai restaurant. It was where Amy and Saurial had first really become friends after their initial unfortunate meeting in the closet at Arcadia. Taylor agreed that the food was quite good, though she was surprised at how crowded it was. They had had reservations, and still had had to wait ten minutes for a table. The two girls were sharing an order of larb gai as they spoke.
"So, your Amy was able to sense and even interfere with your communication with your insects?" asked Amy with interest.
Taylor took a bite from her leaf full of chicken and nodded. "It was like getting static on a radio channel, sort of..."
"Can you access your power so I can see if I can do the same?" asked the healer.
Taylor put her hand out on the table and replied, "Go ahead." She was getting used to thinking of Amy as, if not a friend yet, at least somebody non-hostile.
Amy put a finger on Taylor's wrist like she was checking her pulse. Her eyes focused on nothing for a moment. "Oh," she said, "I can feel that. That's interesting. You can feel and control every insect nearby?"
"Yep, I can. I can even see and hear through them, but bug senses are kind of crap," said Taylor.
"Hmm," hummed Amy. "I might be able to help with that."
"You can affect powers?" said Taylor. Amy hadn't hinted at anything like that in either world.
Amy shook her head. "No...well, probably not. It would also probably mean fiddling with brains, which is not something I feel comfortable doing."
"No offense," said Taylor, "but I don't think I would feel comfortable having my brain fiddled with."
"None taken," said Amy. "I can't affect powers but I can affect bugs."
Taylor thought about that. Given her alter-ego, it was quite evident that Amy was an extremely capable biotinker. Compared to Ianthe, creating a new bug would be child's play. "You think you could create a bug with better senses? Ones that are easier to interpret?"
Amy could sense that her power, which had already been ridiculously happy recently, was intrigued at the thought of creating something else entirely new and different. "I know I can do that," she answered. "In fact, we could create stinging insects with chemicals similar to the ones Ianthe uses on her arm darts. We might even...hmm...yeah... How would you like a beetle that could serve as a relay for your power, so you could potentially have a range covering the whole city?"
Taylor just stared for a moment. "You can really do all that?" she asked. Then after a thought, she added, "You do know I'm a villain, right?"
Amy looked at her skeptically. "I know you didn't want to be, and the fact that you felt the need to point that out right after I offered suggests that you're not as bad as you think you are."
Taylor and Amy both fell silent for a minute while the staff of the restaurant brought out their entrees. Saurial, Varga, and her dad had all told her that she was too critical of herself. This Danny Hebert had been particularly adamant in pointing out all the ways that the authority figures in her life had failed her. He had been somewhat vicious in including himself in that list. Varga had made the point that teenagers weren't expected to make life-and-death decisions for a very good reason, and that he suspected powers made things worse when it came to making good ones. Now Amy Dallon was sitting across the table from her, treating her as if she were a hero...even if she didn't feel like one. She thought that life would be so much easier if she could just change her own feelings through the application of brute force logic.
"You know," continued Amy after the servers left the table, "being around Taylor and Varga tends to have an effect on people beyond what you would expect. My mother has become more tolerant. Vicky has become more careful and thoughtful. Lisa isn't quite so abrasive with her need to show she's the smartest one in the room. Even Rachel seems to have calmed down and accepted that she isn't the alpha around here. Maybe if you spend enough time hanging around here, you can learn not to be so hard on yourself."
"Did you add mind-reading to your powers?" asked Taylor, surprised at the girl's insight.
Amy laughed. "No, mind readers don't exist."
"They do in Peter's and Jimmy's worlds," said Taylor.
Amy paused her laugh. "Really? Well, that's going to be interesting to see. Peter's world is the one where a lot of the powers have a genetic basis, right?"
Taylor started to answer, then paused to think about what a biotinker could do with a gene for telepathy. Instead of answering, she asked, "Do you have any other ideas for new bugs?"
The girl across the table smirked, obviously not missing the blatant change of topic. Rather than argue the point, she said, "How about a beetle big enough that you can ride it?"
Taylor's fork stopped halfway to her mouth and her face took on a considering look. This was proving to be a very interesting lunch conversation, indeed.
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- Location
- brazil
And again i must reiterate everyone on canon Worm is going to have a very weird day soon.
- Location
- Amongst the ashes.
I'm sure Amy and/or Ianthe could do something about the problematic reproduction of tribbles. Though she might become inspired.
This part broke my sense of disbelief though. An internet forum would never spend time arguing about details of a spaceship, fictional or not.
- Location
- On the sofa. (Probably)
Inspired? Like, create a symbiote that reproduces like crazy and cuddles people before merging with them and heals them inspired? They are of course fuzzy and cute but they only move when you aren't looking at them.I'm sure Amy and/or Ianthe could do something about the problematic reproduction of tribbles. Though she might become inspired.
- Location
- US
Well, they are lizard people, so perhaps something that combines SCP-173's self-replication ability with SCP-999?Inspired? Like, create a symbiote that reproduces like crazy and cuddles people before merging with them and heals them inspired? They are of course fuzzy and cute but they only move when you aren't looking at them.
Lycanthromancer
The Arcane Fuzz
- Location
- USA
So, a symbiote/Alien/tribble/crying angel hybrid?Inspired? Like, create a symbiote that reproduces like crazy and cuddles people before merging with them and heals them inspired? They are of course fuzzy and cute but they only move when you aren't looking at them.
...Why am I suddenly filled with blinding amounts of terror?
- Location
- Maryland
John Carpenter already made that film. It was set in Antarctica.
JoshuaSweetvale
Insectovore
- Location
- NL, 65 Million Years Ago
Because if it wasn't set in a sterile hell, its overpowered bodysnatching would've eaten the world in three weeks.
But no, if you want Tribbles that work like Goa'uld, you should watch the 90's movie 'The Puppet Masters' based on Heinlein's book. It's free on the yootoobz I think. It even has a Keith David!
KongouBongo
Always got to make time for tea-time!
- Location
- 26°9'1"N 121°22'57"E
Oh good Amy can create Tyranids
It will be good for them
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