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Ship of Fools: A Taylor Varga Omake (Complete)

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Ship of Fools: A Taylor Varga Omake (Complete) Demons and Angels Seven Days to Skitter
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Shiv Ers said:
And a drunk. This looks plausible as if he had just woken up from celebrating breaking the Warp barrier and found there was no alcohol left for Hair of the Dog. Hung over human looking for Booze does not a diplomat make.
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According to the novelization of "First Contact", he was a manic-depressive, who moderated his manic episodes with drink, and drank when in depressive mode to dull the pain. Once the crew of the Enterprise-E fixed his upwhacked brain chemistry, he sobered up quite nicely and became the man that history said he was.

EDIT: he apparently had an implant that would completely alleviate his manic-depressive symptoms and would only need replacing after five years. Then the War happened, and society collapsed, and his wild mood swings came back, and he took to the bottle to deal with that.
 
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Vyrexuviel said:
According to the novelization of "First Contact", he was a manic-depressive, who moderated his manic episodes with drink, and drank when in depressive mode to dull the pain. Once the crew of the Enterprise-E fixed his upwhacked brain chemistry, he sobered up quite nicely and became the man that history said he was.

EDIT: he apparently had an implant that would completely alleviate his manic-depressive symptoms and would only need replacing after five years. Then the War happened, and society collapsed, and his wild mood swings came back, and he took to the bottle to deal with that.
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Could be worse, the Enterprise crew might find no Cochrane, but his place in history has been taken by a 'Doc' Brown... :)
 
Ace Dreamer said:
Could be worse, the Enterprise crew might find no Cochrane, but his place in history has been taken by a 'Doc' Brown... :)
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That's basically what all humans are in Star Trek anyway. ^^ "throw SCIENCE! at the wall and see what sticks!"

Meanwhile the Vulcan Science Academy is in the background, eating popcorn with chopsticks, and the Klingons as whispering to them, "aren't you going to stop them?"

"Why bother? They are highly illogical, but they make interesting science happen."

Why else do you think the Borg are having such a hard time assimilating the Federation? ^^
 
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Omake: HE COMES!
  • Sidestory
    • Omake: HE COMES!

    The Master Biologist looked out on the vast cavern filled with breeding chambers. It had taken a lot of effort to obtain the sample they needed, but the creature known as Doomsday had served as the progenitor of a new army, and they would be ready soon. After that, the Guild would lose their grip on his people, and the Family and their allies would fall. The Master allowed himself a small smile.

    It was at that point that an alarm began to sound. His assistant brought up the sensor report, and cried, "The Equestria! It's here! Somehow they found us!"

    "What?" said the Master Biologist. "Impossible! My army isn't ready yet. Release the xenomorphs from stasis!"

    There was a massive booming sound, like something falling from a great height.

    "It's too late..." said his assistant.

    It began quietly at first. "I love you, you love me..." The song continued, getting louder and louder. The Master Biologist could feel his will sapping. How could he have planned to hurt his friends? He would never do something like that! The heavy tread grew louder and louder, as did the song. Eventually, HE appeared. "WON'T YOU SAY YOU LOVE ME TOO!" The song ended.

    A tear fell from the Master Biologist's eye. "I love you," he whispered.

    The purple dinosaur looked at him and his assistant. "YOU TWO HAVEN'T BEEN VERY NICE. YOU NEED TO SAY YOU'RE SORRY."

    The Master Biologist and his assistant both fell to their knees. "I am sorry," he said, with the same words coming from his assistant a half-a-second later. "Is there anything I can do to earn your forgiveness."

    The giant reptile looked at the two of them with a hungry compassion. "I FORGIVE YOU, BUT I AM SOOO HUNGRY. CAN YOU REMOVE YOUR ARMOR?"

    The Master felt like a fool. Of course, he needed to remove his armor. If he offered himself while wearing it, well...it would get in the way.

    "CAN YOU SING THE SONG?"

    The Master Biologist began singing softly, smiling as he watched his friend begin to eat his assistant, starting at the legs. He was pleased to hear him singing too...for as long as he could. You had to keep singing for as long as you could, after all.

    * * * * *​

    "Did you have to send HIM?" asked the dark alicorn on the bridge of the starship.

    "You know what he had planned, Luna," replied her sister.

    Luna frowned. "You couldn't have just turned him to stone, Celestia?"

    Celestia stamped her hoof. "You know that never works for long, and besides, HE was getting hungry again."

    "I still don't know what Ianthe was thinking," muttered Luna. "Purple reptiles can't be all bad, my rump."

    Celestia just sighed. "Just take us home."

    The Equestria waited long enough to retrieve a certain purple dinosaur, then broke orbit.

    Author's Note: I briefly toyed with making this part of the Ripley-verse epilogue, but it just came out to be both too crack-fic and too dark...
     
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  • Sidestory
    • Derek M said:
    Author's Note: I briefly toyed with making this part of the Ripley-verse epilogue, but it just came out to be both too crack-fic and too dark...
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    Which is an incredibly odd combination to see.

    Anyways... Welp. It's been an incredible ride, not sure if there's any epilogues left. Regardless, this has been pretty fun to read.
     
    gatewaewanderer said:
    Which is an incredibly odd combination to see.

    Anyways... Welp. It's been an incredible ride, not sure if there's any epilogues left. Regardless, this has been pretty fun to read.
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    There are.

    Ripley-verse is work-in-progress. Then we have DC Comics, Stargate, Dresden, Skitter-verse (not necessarily in that order), and finally the last epilogue, which belongs to everybody's favorite lizards.

    I have two primary ideas for spin-off stories, one of which I've teased in an omake. I may do another omake about the other concept...but it involves Über teaching Muggle Studies at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry (though that is NOT the main thrust of the plot).
     
    Transreal Cloud said:
    Why do people hate Barney so much?
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    Serious answer: because he has no emotional range.
    Look at more beloved children's characters, like the ones on Seseme Street for example, and they run the full range of emotions, happyness, sadness, surprise, confusion, and so on.
    Barney and other similarly disliked figures like the Teletubbies have one and only one emotion, a sort of over-the-top giddy happiness, and it's disconcerting because no one is like that all the time. It falls into a sort of emotional uncanny valley where it comes across to anyone with more developed emotions than a toddler as insincere or manipulative rather than genuinely expressive.
     
    IronySandwich said:
    Serious answer: because he has no emotional range.
    Look at more beloved children's characters, like the ones on Seseme Street for example, and they run the full range of emotions, happyness, sadness, surprise, confusion, and so on.
    Barney and other similarly disliked figures like the Teletubbies have one and only one emotion, a sort of over-the-top giddy happiness, and it's disconcerting because no one is like that all the time. It falls into a sort of emotional uncanny valley where it comes across to anyone with more developed emotions than a toddler as insincere or manipulative rather than genuinely expressive.
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    When I grew up in New England many years ago, my staples as a toddler were Sesame Street, The Electric Company, and the Boston-area version of Romper Room. You can imagine my horror when I noticed my younger relatives in later years were watching stuff like Barney and Friends or Teletubbies, which seemed fairly mindless compared to the shows of my youth. By the time I became a parent, I found my own son's interest in Thomas the Tank Engine relatively benign. Better to watch a positive spin on British Imperialism and Indentured Servitude than utterly mindless cheer.

    Edit: TV in my youth was not all positive. I remember watching a somewhat depressing version of Bozo's Bigtop, as well as having nightmares about HR Puffinstuff. I forgot Fred Rogers, though, who always deserves a mention (at least in passing) when one is talking about quality kids' TV.
     
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    My hate for Barney was due to the thing saying, "I'm your secret friend." *blinks* No... just just no.

    Hehehehehehe, hey @Derek M, how about at the end of this, Ianthe vanishes in a puff of smoke, getting caught up in the Pan-Dimensional Shenanigans? :evil: :D
     
    people hated his voice the creator of Barney had idea to make his voice auto hynotic, as much as the law allows for TV... to get kids hooked on the show and cover for its lackings ... But theres a big group of ppl that find that frequincy of voice annoying, me included....FYI teddy rukspine used same technology... I liked the story , waiting to see what else is happening....
     
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    You know, looking at the current 300+ kwords of this story, I'm wondering what the longest omake ever actually is? :D

    Bearing in mind that it's not finished and is already longer than the first three Harry Potter books put together...

    Keep it up :)
     
    IronySandwich said:
    Barney and other similarly disliked figures like the Teletubbies have one and only one emotion, a sort of over-the-top giddy happiness, and it's disconcerting
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    Heh.

    I don't recall my oldest ever being noticeably scared of anything much... except Teletubbies. Never exposed him to Barney though.

    (He's old enough to vote by now.)
     
    Could be worse. My brother was obsessed with The Wiggles, Dora the Explorer, and Diago. Oh, and Bob the Builder.
     
    Seseme Street and Mr Roger's Neighborhood for me. Although I also watched and enjoyed shows like Care Bears, My Little Pony (original series) and The Smurfs. All of which might have been aimed at young children, but still were not afraid to regularly cover some rather serious subjects. Hell, for all it's cheerful "everything will be all right" astetic, Care Bears was a dark series when you sit down and think about it. It dealt with everything from kidnapping to child neglect and abuse on a regular basis. Hell, even He-Man and She-Ra would cover some rather dark subject matters. And anyone who claims Rainbow Bright was a light hearted series never actually watched it.
     
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