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A Sword Without a Hilt: A Song of Ice and Fire/D&D 3.5 Crossover

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@Snowfire will have a blissful plane full of sane, happy people. Everyone else will find it boring - so he'll start spawning beautiful sub-planes full of adventure, at a far greater speed and quality than any other plane !
#SnowfireDelivers
#MOAR_HT

Azel said:
The local currency in yours will be baguettes.
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More seriously, this assumes that all baguettes have equal value. If the population gets picky, then suddenly each baguette will have a fluctuating value depending on who likes what type of baguette (which flour type, how well cooked, etc). Economic collapse may occur. Food currency kinda isn't optimal.
Damnit.
 
Tomcost said:
... I thought that the magpie man here was @Duesal ?

QUOTE]
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Mostly because in my demented Meta-ASWAH canon you spent years in the Saltcave training a bunch of magpies in a convoluted escape scheme before you got out thr usual way. The Angry Magpies, as they came to be known, became a part of the local ecosystem.

... Dont ask why. It has its roots in a couple of faux journal entries I wrote about exploring the Saltcave when I was relegated there after the Blink Dogs/fey trader debacle, feels like years ago...


Rip @Mormont by the way too, since we were reminiscing about missing regulars. I wonder what he's up to...

For @Duesal 's plane I imagine an enormous, and I mean truly giagantic, tower made of the assorted' junk' of the multiverse. Magpies big and small ranging from coin sized to skycraper size come and go bringing interesting stuff from other people's planes. It all piles up into the massive Lootkeeper Tower (also known as the Lootkeep) , atop which the King Magpie rules supreme, an ever glimmering speck of greed in his eyes.
 
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bigbow said:
Mostly because in my demented Meta-ASWAH canon you spent years in the Saltcave training a bunch of magpies in a convoluted escape scheme before you got out thr usual way. The Angry Magpies, as they came to be known, became a part of the local ecosystem.

... Dont ask why. It has its roots in a couple of faux journal entries I wrote about exploring the Saltcave when I was relegated there after the Blink Dogs/fey trader debacle, feels like years ago...


Rip @Mormont by the way too, since we were reminiscing about missing regulars. I wonder what he's up to...

For @Duesal 's plane I imagine an enormous, and I mean truly giagantic, tower made of the assorted' junk' of the multiverse. Magpies big and small ranging from coin sized to skycraper size come and go bringing interesting stuff from other people's planes. It all piles up into the massive Lootkeeper Tower, atop which the King Magpie rules supreme, an ever glimmering speck of greed in his eyes.
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> Implying the Magpie King has only a single speck of greed in his eyes.
No, his eyes are 99% greed and 1% loot indexing and search-fu.
 
bigbow said:
For @Duesal 's plane I imagine an enormous, and I mean truly giagantic, tower made of the assorted' junk' of the multiverse. Magpies big and small ranging from coin sized to skycraper size come and go bringing interesting stuff from other people's planes. It all piles up into the massive Lootkeeper Tower, atop which the King Magpie rules supreme, an ever glimmering speck of greed in his eyes.
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And at the top of this ever growing tower sits a giant castle, filled to the brim with the shiniest stuff from the pile and the stuffed corpses of anyone who ever tried to take something from the pile. And at the very center stands the Loot Throne, Duesal resting on it and the air filled by the chant of the arch-magpies: "Loot for the Loot Throne! Skulls for the trophy room!"

As for Goldfish, his one will have vast forges, producing the finest gear in the multi-verse, guarded by great and powerful soldiers.
 
bigbow said:
Mostly because in my demented Meta-ASWAH canon you spent years in the Saltcave training a bunch of magpies in a convoluted escape scheme before you got out thr usual way. The Angry Magpies, as they came to be known, became a part of the local ecosystem.

... Dont ask why. It has its roots in a couple of faux journal entries I wrote about exploring the Saltcave when I was relegated there after the Blink Dogs/fey trader debacle, feels like years ago...
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Wow, didn't really expect someone to have developed so much meta-ASWAH canon. Care to share it around?
 
Snowfire said:
Mormont has rated pretty much every HT update I've posted, including the latest chapter, so they're still around. Just not posting that much.
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They're? Sounds like some sort of hive mind. The Mormont Collective? :rofl:

I'm imagening @Artemis1992 plane like a sort of High Fantasy Mad-Max style '' wasteland''. Bands of adventurers are constantly well, adventuring, seeking the favor of the Encounter-God in this infinitly expanding realm of high fantasy villages, towns, and dungeons. When rival adventurer bands meet though... Well, then we get Mad Max. The Encounter-God witnesses these clashes from his redoubt, Questmaker Stronghold, and smiles.
 
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A Supplicant scales the last few steps of Lootkeeper Tower and postrates himself. He reverently holds out a bowl of cookies.

The King Magpie eyes them suspiciously, and caws.
 
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Canon Omake: Doing Ancestors Proud
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    • Doing Ancestors Proud
    ​
    As Salladhor Saan read over reports from the comfort of his office aboard the Valyrian about the progress being made across the Basilisk Isles under his control he couldn't help but think back on his ancestors and imagine what they would think if they saw their descendant now. Might be worth asking how possible that is with magic, He thought with a chuckle.

    The Saan family, House Saan now, dated back centuries and was famous/infamous for the number of great pirate-lords it produced. Sargoso Saan was a pirate-lord active in the Stepstones late in the reign of Aegon the Conqueror himself, Samarro Saan, the 'Last Valyrian', was a member of the Band of Nine, and arguably the most successful ancestor of his was Saathos Saan, a Lysene captain who led a fleet to the Basilisk Isles to clear out its pirates, only to turn pirate himself.

    Salla like to think he took most after old Saathos.

    Saathos became a great pirate-lord, uniting and reigning as King of the Basilisk Isles for thirty years. Considering the fact what this place was like before Salla started burning it all down and building it into something respectable that was impressive. He lived at some point the reign of King Jaehaerys, the Conciliator, and he found it fitting that two fine rulers established themselves roughly at the same time though likely never interacted with each other. And now Salla was continuing the family legacy, though it truly was a shame that the Saans were apparently driven from the Isles after Saathos death.

    Salla bet all the Saans who attempted to fill Saathos' shoes utterly failed and cut and run during the time, letting the Isles return to their more savage ways in the process, which was idiotic since they were basically royalty then. He certainly wasn't about to make the same mistake.

    Sure the Isles as they were now were not the greatest, but all his hard work and the work of his people have already done much to cut back on the major issues and they were finally starting to turn the area into a major trading hub. Without the threat of slavers and pirates coming from the Isles merchants from both ends of the world were much more willingly to make the trip and even make port, something which that was already profiting Salla handsomely.

    The young king was not lying when he said that once he built up this region he could beggar some much older and established nobles, and it was not like turning from a pirate-lord into a merchant one required much hard work on his part. There wasn't much different between the two after all, just one used his words and goods to depart others from their coin more often than their blade. While not as exciting most days that didn't mean there wasn't adventure to be found at times.

    With Sothoryos at his doorstep and all sorts of things crawling out of there things were never entirely boring. While he could do without some of the larger painted lizards he did find if he was successful in hunting one the entire body could be sold off for a great amount of coin.

    He paused from his thoughts to take a sip of some tea from Yi Ti, tasted good but he still preferred wine.

    It was a shame he was so busy or else he might have gone to enjoy the festival the king was throwing in Sorcerer's Deep, perhaps encourage a few of his more skilled men to try their hand at the contests. Might have been a good opportunity to hire more skilled swords in helping ensure his rule and kill whatever crawled out of the jungles at times that he much preferred to be far away from.

    Oh well, there was always next year. And Salla truly believed there would be a next year and many years after that under the Dragon King. And he would make sure that House Saan would be there as well, rising higher and higher over time as their nobility was acknowledged and envied as was only right. Of course that meant he would have to properly get his family and extended family together to really iron out the hierarchy, Salla was obviously at the top but he needed to sort out who was useful that can be trusted to handle things and the fools that had to be distracted.

    He would also need to find a wife at some point and sire proper heirs, mayhaps a lovely lady who also knew magic? Never hurt to make sure that was within the bloodline with how important and widespread magic would be in a few years time.

    But such thoughts was for another time for he was done with his reports and he could finally relax along with his favorite bed warmer... it would be ever better if his future wife was quite open to allowing others into their bed. After all, as Summer Islanders say, "love should be open to all."
     
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    • @bigbow's plane will have tons of rocks with all the answers to life's questions in whatever native tongue you have, answering the next question you have as you walk towards the next rock...

    Creepy and weird Purple nonsense!
     
    Part MMDCLXXVI: Of Fairness and Fey
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    • Of Fairness and Fey ​

    Twenty-Fourth Day of the Eighth Month 293 AC

    "You might as well ask me what aught to be done with all Westerosi or Essosi." Your tone is rather less genial than it had been thus far. You have seen far too many evils done in the names heaped upon others without thought. 'Witch', 'savage', 'lowlander', it all comes down to the same things in the end: pain and death absolved, with a sweet nostrum of self-deception. "They are not a monolithic force united under a single banner and purpose, so I have no sweeping plans for all of them, just as I don't treat every Westerosi as a traitor to my House or every Essosi as a slaver."

    Horas looks vaguely vindicated at the words while those who know you merely stand back to watch the exchange they had doubtlessly been expecting. It is Samwell, however, who reacts most strongly, wide-eyed and hardly seeming to breathe at the notion that anyone could confront his father thus. You become ever more convinced that he will be far better off away from Randyll, but for now that is not what your mind is set upon.

    "Of the fey and their courts I've met so far, I've seen great differences in character and desires. From genuine well-meaning and honor right down to cruelty worthy of a pit-spawn, I've met them all, and as much as they are different from each other, so should our relationship to them be. I for one am quite glad to have the aid of some fey, such as the bulabar who are still the most important part of the city's Engineering Guild, and so far I never heard complaints about the proprietors of the Golden Hearth."

    "I wouldn't know," the Lord of Horn Hill grumbles. "We were trying to keep from being seen too openly."

    And by the same token he is about as interested as a fish would be in wings, Dany's half-amused and half exasperated voice rings in your mind.

    "What am I, then?" Moonsong asks, right on time. Her faintly-glowing silver eyes narrow, "Maybe I have not been obvious enough of late..."

    "I simply didn't feel the need to blow your horn. You are far better at it than I am, and glad for every opportunity to do so," you reply quickly before she can take that thread of reasoning too far. While you doubt she would do anything actively dangerous or illegal, the fey captain is clever enough to be thoroughly disruptive without crossing either line.

    "Surely not," she laughs. "As you were so kind as to lend the stage to me, let me tell a story of my deeds for any who are new to our fair city. Now this all began on the coast of Sothoryos when Dead-Fingers Dylan tried to steal painted lizard eggs but fell afoul of a blood pot flower. It must have been about two months ago...."

    Fair play, you acknowledge with a nod, allowing her to finish her long if admittedly entertaining story of misadventure, near-death, and improbable rescues that must nonetheless be true for the fey cannot lie. If nothing else it should give the Lord of Horn Hill the time to adsorb your perspective on fey and the otherworldly in general. When the tale is finally through, you turn to him and continue your point.

    "Would it be fair to assume you are mostly asking about the Court of Stars that the Tyrells have dealings with? As for them, I'm far less positively inclined after my meeting with their representative. It bears remembering that the fey are fundamentally alien in their mindset, so some caution is always advised when dealing with them."

    Somewhat to your surprise Moonsong neither rolls her eyes nor does she interject again, having obviously gotten her fill of attention for now, or perhaps even curious about where you intend to take this all. That you are more than willing to provide: "What I want to see and what I fight for is peaceful coexistence between man and all other kinds of beings. So long as one keeps to the law of the land, I see no reason to reject to someone's presence, be they man, fey, angel, or whatever else. That Court, though, seems to have little regard for the desires of mortals, instead having sought ways to be placed above the law, if not outright to gain dominion over mortals which they would treat akin to cattle or toys. Whatever went through Mace Tyrell's head when he began to support that farce I do not know, but I shudder to imagine."

    At these words Randyll Tarly does a most improbable thing for one of such serious, not to say sour, mien—he laughs. True it is a vaguely growling sound with more grim satisfaction than mirth. "So you are going to bring the damn things up before a bailiff to get a hand cut off for theft, or hung for murder. Now that I would like to see..."

    "All things told we would prefer that there be fewer killings and maimings in the realm," Dany interjects, stung by the notion that 'the rule of law' is just another name for dolling out death and suffering and nothing else. "The latter especially is barbaric. What sort of honest work do you expect a reformed thief to do with only one hand when added to the shame of his crime being known by all who pass him by? Unfortunately we must kill people who are too dangerous to be left alive, but it is a foul thing to turn all of us into torturers of those who have erred." She remembers her time at the Rat just as well as you, and the unlikely friends you had made there, the uncommon understandings you had reached.

    A chair scrapes faintly across the floor as Lord Tarly turns to your sister, some disparaging remark doubtlessly upon his lips, but as she meets his gaze with the cool stare of a dragon contemplating the world from atop its hoard the words die on his lips.

    Silence falls as Horas Redwyne looks around the room for a long moment: "I might as well say it seeing as we are all thinking it—nothing went through his head. Thinking is not something he is renowned for, alas..."

    Lord Tarly throws the young Redwyne a halfhearted glare for his irreverence, but he does not contest the point aloud. "So how are you going to deal with them, then?" he asks you.

    "I do not know if a peaceful accord can be reached with the Court of Stars, but some form of order needs to be established one way or another. If their leadership insists on their unwarranted arrogance, I will have to hash out said agreement with their underlings instead," you reply, the same answer you would have given if he had asked you about the conquest of Norvos or Qohor, however unlikely such a question would have been.

    A somewhat grudging nod is your answer, though accompanied by a question: "So can you do it, then? Burn down their forests, as Aegon burned the armies of the Gardeners at the Field of Fire, make them kneel?"

    "I believe so, or I would not propose the notion. If you would have proof then I can offer you same as I did to Horas, but let us not rise from the table with food yet to be eaten and wine yet to be drunk," you reply.

    As though your words had been a signal, and knowing Hestior is listening perhaps they had been, the next course floats into the room—venison with mushroom sauce and a fine Dornish Red that earns compliments from all present, no small feat seeing as the Tarlys are Marcher lords.

    The next weighty question from the Lord of Horn Hill is not long in coming, however. "So what are you planning to do about the land if you win?"

    "Land?" you prompt, though you can guess well enough it is better if he says it in full.

    "The land you will confiscate? I'd like to know what sorts of men are in your fighting tail," he replies.

    What do you answer?

    [] Write in

    OOC: Lord Tarly rubs Dany the wrong way because she sees how frightened Sam is of him, so when he casually mentioned maiming people she decided to give him a taste of his own medicine.
     
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