@DragonParadox is the whole "they can't forget I'm a kinslayer" thing more projection than not?
I get the feeling when anyone in Last Refuge remembers she had to kill her Void-touched sire, thoughts of her being a kinslayer are more reflexive rather than true disgust, and the majority (if not all) of the pity is the fact she was terrorized by something they know all too well and can't ever forget.
Gilly definitely isn't being objective here. A lot of it is feeling like she does not quite fit, like she is being humored and pitied so she decided to jump in on the deep end of social interaction.