NoxOfUmbra
Shadow of the night
- Location
- Colombia, South América
- Pronouns
- He/Him/His
A more philosophical exploration of the insights and what the arts mean to us could be awesome if given more screentime before insights votes
Threads Of Destiny(Eastern Fantasy, Sequel to Forge of Destiny)
- Thread starter yrsillar
- Start date
- Original Users' Choice!
Voted best in category in the Users' Choice awards.
yeah, i hope the math cabal can keep their jobs
- Location
- Brazil
Yeah, this kind of bothers me too. It feels like it's more of an eyeball system than anything.
- Location
- Finland
Instead of D to SSS, maybe have a scale that starts at 1, and then increases form there but is used by all levels of cultivation.
1 to 10 is mortal.
11 to 20 is red.
21 to 50 is yellow.
51 to 100 is Green.
And so on.
The actual scales might need tuning a bit, but the idea is there.
1 to 10 is mortal.
11 to 20 is red.
21 to 50 is yellow.
51 to 100 is Green.
And so on.
The actual scales might need tuning a bit, but the idea is there.
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- Location
- Required Location
Ultimately I want a system that satisfies two requirements.
One, it easily translates well into a novel version as by now, where this quest has become a part of your income, it needs the quest needs to be written with the publication on RR and Amazon in mind. This also should help keep things at a decent update pace.
Two it needs to satisfy my "number going up", incremental progression obsession. I want stats and and skill levels and I want to feel like they mean something. Rolls I can take or leave. The randomness can either make for a hilarious story or a really shitty one and if this was my job I'd not risk a good storyline going to crap due to dicerolls. Dice rolls for minor characters progression (like the Su Ling progress rolls or the GF groups progress rolls) are actually a good way to have some randomness in the quest without endangering the main plot. It could also be used to get people to write omakes, commission art or pay you for sidestories if these could give bonuses to these minor chars development and rolls.
In conclusion: I'd prefer a story where a consistent,meaningful stat skeleton informs a characters abilities and therefore story impact but I am fine with a narrative quest as long as the "level up" feeling doesnt leave the quest entirely
One, it easily translates well into a novel version as by now, where this quest has become a part of your income, it needs the quest needs to be written with the publication on RR and Amazon in mind. This also should help keep things at a decent update pace.
Two it needs to satisfy my "number going up", incremental progression obsession. I want stats and and skill levels and I want to feel like they mean something. Rolls I can take or leave. The randomness can either make for a hilarious story or a really shitty one and if this was my job I'd not risk a good storyline going to crap due to dicerolls. Dice rolls for minor characters progression (like the Su Ling progress rolls or the GF groups progress rolls) are actually a good way to have some randomness in the quest without endangering the main plot. It could also be used to get people to write omakes, commission art or pay you for sidestories if these could give bonuses to these minor chars development and rolls.
In conclusion: I'd prefer a story where a consistent,meaningful stat skeleton informs a characters abilities and therefore story impact but I am fine with a narrative quest as long as the "level up" feeling doesnt leave the quest entirely
I rather like Art Modification's implications for character direction, but I don't really care about their combat mechanics either.
- Location
- The Star Kingdom of Manticore
After long and arduous thought staring at a blank wall I have come to the conclusion that the future of the system lies in modeling every single action, down to the twitching of a finger, with rolling D2s. It is the only path forward and I am a visionary.
- Location
- The Maple Syrup Mountains
It's worth keeping in mind that for our cultivation nowadays the law of large numbers has started to take effect and there isn't much radical variation from the expected payouts anymore. Essentially this means the cultivation rolls provide minor randomness to Ling Qi's growth rate while also giving the math cabal more to chew on.
On the whole I would say that dice rolls in the cultivation side of things are still an aspect of the story that I like, though if yrsillar needs to downsize it to streamline things that's also fine. I also agree though that dice rolls should have minimal presence in the narrative arcs if an unusually bad roll could derail the plot and tangle up the narrative being written.
I don't understand the point of all this mechanical complexity that never does anything since you almost never roll any dice anymore for actual in-play stuff, and you rarely ask us to make decisions on mechanical art usage. I see all this effort from a "math cabal" sub-group of players trying to figure out the cultivation game, and then you just decide encounters based on what you think should happen. I genuinely don't understand the point. Linq Qi and her spirit companions have this well-defined mechanical definition of their super-powers and what they are good at, but then that well-defined mechanical definition gets used by you, yrsillar, as a rough guide for how to write scenes.
It's like printing out an AutoCAD drawing to use as a coloring book.
I don't really mind keeping the game fairly abstract and having voting decisions be about social decisions or (rarely) high level strategy. It's a good quest that way! But I'm not going to both figuring out Ranks and Arts and shit since it's never going to affect a vote and it's nearly impossible to figure out downstream narrative consequences. When it comes to Art decisions, I just vote for whatever seems coolest.
So I guess bottom line is, whatever you do with the mechanics I would really like to be able to answer a simple question. How does this matter? How will it affect Ling Qi and her story down the road? How will it provide future options for me to vote on or not vote on? How will it change Ling Qi's destiny? And that goes both ways, it's not just about the mechanics but about providing votes (or clear situations that are the result of votes) where the mechanics matter. If Ling Qi gets her ass kicked by someone good at X, I'd like to be able to trace that back to clear decisions by the threat focusing on countering Y rather than X, and then us voting to face off against someone good at X anyway.
I mean, right now you're turning TYoD into a story on Royal Road, and it seems perfectly enjoyable without the mechanics stuff, which is even more invisible there than it is here. Which goes to show that the mechanics are completely divorced from the narrative.
It's like making a D&D character, and then we just roleplay everything.
So yes, all I want from the mechanics is a clear line where we can see how those mechanical choices mattered.
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I think keeping to the current turn structure is limiting you more than it helps @yrsillar
In my opinion -and im only a reader, not a writer, so i can be wrong there- the advantage of the turn system is that it gives the writer a structure they can use as orientation, which is really helpful for newer writers, right? So one question is: Do you really still need it?
We have seen that turns have grown longer and longer, with turn 11 being a super big turn that took almost half a year real life time and with other big events such as the outer sect tournament and the auction coming up, i see those turns blow up too, at which point we get more super long turns.
In addition to that, the turn structure might make it hard in the future to have a project running over multiple months, such as art creations, because you would always need to write about Ling Qi finishing up the other things in the turn.
I am admittedly not certain what do replace it with and how to work in cultivation votes.
A second thing: passive (stat) bonuses on arts.
I would like you to consider removing those completly. I know they are intended as abstraction of skill gained via training them, but they result in situations like with ENM where we dont un-equip an otherwise unused art simply because it gives passive stats. And this imo sort of cheapens the purpose of arts.
In my opinion -and im only a reader, not a writer, so i can be wrong there- the advantage of the turn system is that it gives the writer a structure they can use as orientation, which is really helpful for newer writers, right? So one question is: Do you really still need it?
We have seen that turns have grown longer and longer, with turn 11 being a super big turn that took almost half a year real life time and with other big events such as the outer sect tournament and the auction coming up, i see those turns blow up too, at which point we get more super long turns.
In addition to that, the turn structure might make it hard in the future to have a project running over multiple months, such as art creations, because you would always need to write about Ling Qi finishing up the other things in the turn.
I am admittedly not certain what do replace it with and how to work in cultivation votes.
A second thing: passive (stat) bonuses on arts.
I would like you to consider removing those completly. I know they are intended as abstraction of skill gained via training them, but they result in situations like with ENM where we dont un-equip an otherwise unused art simply because it gives passive stats. And this imo sort of cheapens the purpose of arts.
- Location
- The Maple Syrup Mountains
Another angle of streamlining math cabal things might be the pill gacha. I'm not too versed in how it's handled by now but it sounds like there's emergent complexity balance issues going on every time new pills are offered, which sounds like a lot of work for something that's a mostly-background mechanic.
The good part of pills is that they let us focus better on specific qualities on a turn by turn basis, like a month dedicated to buffing our physical cultivation gains, but you don't need emergent complexity to make that happen. If you abstract to the level of 'pill combos' (equivalent to the cumulative bonus and cost of multiple synergistic pills) and allow us to only take one per turn, that will preserve the ability to specialize turns based on pill combos without the emergent complexity balance issues of adding pills one by one and hoping there isn't a gamebreaking combo in them.
The good part of pills is that they let us focus better on specific qualities on a turn by turn basis, like a month dedicated to buffing our physical cultivation gains, but you don't need emergent complexity to make that happen. If you abstract to the level of 'pill combos' (equivalent to the cumulative bonus and cost of multiple synergistic pills) and allow us to only take one per turn, that will preserve the ability to specialize turns based on pill combos without the emergent complexity balance issues of adding pills one by one and hoping there isn't a gamebreaking combo in them.
While the fine tuning of our combat is part of the quest at this point, I believe taking a look at how more narrative systems like Exalted or Nobilis handle things might be helpful.
Especially as we get more and more esoteric in arts and domain and conflicts, I think it might be worth thinking about ditching fine numbers and leaning entirely on the Magnitude system for all aspects of play, turning the myriad small skill boni into fewer, more significant boosts.
Leave dice out of combat and skill use entirely, make everything dependant on roleplay and relative art/attribute/domain power.
I think it's important for keeping true to the setting to keep some level of risk and randomness for cultivation/breakthrough/tribulation though, which is most of the work of the math cabal anyway I think.
It might also worth considering that the current system mechanicises most of the advantages of our cultivation, while the disadvantages (heart demons, way enforced behaviour, conflicting insights) are vague even in the narrative, so many cultivation decisions feel like flying blind. Bringing those aspects closer in how they are implemented would be a more personal wish.
Especially as we get more and more esoteric in arts and domain and conflicts, I think it might be worth thinking about ditching fine numbers and leaning entirely on the Magnitude system for all aspects of play, turning the myriad small skill boni into fewer, more significant boosts.
Leave dice out of combat and skill use entirely, make everything dependant on roleplay and relative art/attribute/domain power.
I think it's important for keeping true to the setting to keep some level of risk and randomness for cultivation/breakthrough/tribulation though, which is most of the work of the math cabal anyway I think.
It might also worth considering that the current system mechanicises most of the advantages of our cultivation, while the disadvantages (heart demons, way enforced behaviour, conflicting insights) are vague even in the narrative, so many cultivation decisions feel like flying blind. Bringing those aspects closer in how they are implemented would be a more personal wish.
- Location
- United States of America
Ultimately, as far as I am aware, the only mechanics we actually see on a regular basis is the cultivation mechanics.
The combat mechanics and social mechanics seem entirely unseen and unimportant. I would have no problem in cutting them out entirely. I would much rather have us focus on increasing our skills narratively instead of just throwing dice at them and having them boost in the background.
The combat mechanics and social mechanics seem entirely unseen and unimportant. I would have no problem in cutting them out entirely. I would much rather have us focus on increasing our skills narratively instead of just throwing dice at them and having them boost in the background.
Since I can understand the current system well enough by now, I don't really want change anymore. You are pretty much doing the novelization s a job, though, so it needs to be a system you can use properly for that place (and numbers going up helps too).
As it is, things are definitely too complex to properly integrate into novel chapters. You can probably leave most of the dice rolling as it is (doesn't need to be in the novel and you have a math cabal for the arcane secrets of probability), but you need more easily accessible art descriptions and such.
Sorry I can't actually help there. At least you can leave things that aren't arts (like social and combat mechanics)as they are, since you can just cut them out entirely in the novel.
As it is, things are definitely too complex to properly integrate into novel chapters. You can probably leave most of the dice rolling as it is (doesn't need to be in the novel and you have a math cabal for the arcane secrets of probability), but you need more easily accessible art descriptions and such.
Sorry I can't actually help there. At least you can leave things that aren't arts (like social and combat mechanics)as they are, since you can just cut them out entirely in the novel.
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I think the cultivation system should either be made deterministic or overhauled for more variance. As it is, we basically get the average outcome every time. It's like playing DnD with d20s where 999 out of 1000 rolls you get a 10 or 11. That's not very interesting gameplay.
And it'll only get worse as we add more cultivation dice, since by the CLT, variance is inversely proportional to the square root of the number of dice.
My 2c is to make a two-tiered cultivation experience system where the first dice (say a d100) is rolled to determine a range of outcomes. So if you roll 1-10 you blow out a meridian or something, and 95-100 you get an epiphany, basically a cultivation XP multiplier. Then the cultivation exp dice is rolled, or maybe replace exp dice with something entirely deterministic.
And it'll only get worse as we add more cultivation dice, since by the CLT, variance is inversely proportional to the square root of the number of dice.
My 2c is to make a two-tiered cultivation experience system where the first dice (say a d100) is rolled to determine a range of outcomes. So if you roll 1-10 you blow out a meridian or something, and 95-100 you get an epiphany, basically a cultivation XP multiplier. Then the cultivation exp dice is rolled, or maybe replace exp dice with something entirely deterministic.
glyph
completely and utterly fine
I basically only engage with the story on a narrative level, and gloss over all the mechanical details like turn votes or cultivation rolls. The only thing they really provide to me is a nice "number go up" feeling, but tbh, that's not what I'm here for and I wouldn't miss it if it were gone.
I think Art/Tech/Domain Mods/Creation design should be mostly in your hands, perhaps with some ideas and suggestions given by the voters. The HDW-Mod was a bit of a disaster and created disjointed techs that you the writer had difficulty using. The RME-Mod was better but the most recent gardening-Mod vote where we got to choose a philosophical idea of Ling Qi's that begat a theme change that begat mechanics felt clean. Those are the kind of Art choices that are fun, where it feels like it's Ling Qi making a meaningful choice with associated Art and Tech development.
- Location
- The willow crowned hill
- Pronouns
- She/They
My own $0.02 on sites:
As is, sites are really boring from a mechanical perspective, and narratively serve little role other than to allow for cultivation scenes outside of our cave. My idea would be to have sites essentially grant arts an extra keyword, and imparting a multiplier through that. This would also affect how we express the art, and incentivize us to seek out sites with more interesting natures. (This would probably also involve raising our personal multipliers somewhat to compensate mechanically)
As is, sites are really boring from a mechanical perspective, and narratively serve little role other than to allow for cultivation scenes outside of our cave. My idea would be to have sites essentially grant arts an extra keyword, and imparting a multiplier through that. This would also affect how we express the art, and incentivize us to seek out sites with more interesting natures. (This would probably also involve raising our personal multipliers somewhat to compensate mechanically)
- Location
- The Star Kingdom of Manticore
To me the big issue I had with the plan votes is that the pressure of doing well in the tournament forced us to progress as fast as possible. Hopefully with change in focus we can spend some breathing room to take the pedal off the metal and explore some less than optimal plans to explore the world more.
Okay, so let's look back at the last Month vote.
In fact, before we go to the vote, let's look at some of the results Yrsillar gave us prior to the vote.
Intelligence 2d6+2
1, 1, 2=4
Resolve 1d6+2
6, 2=8
Government 3d6+6
1, 3, 2, 6=12
Survival 4d6+4
4, 4, 4, 6, 4=22
Beast Handling 3d6+3
3, 2, 6, 3=14
Art 3d6+6 +1d6
3, 4, 6, 5, 6=24
Sincere Negotiator 4d6+8
6, 5, 3, 5, 8=27
Qi 10d6+10
2,2,5,5,6,4,3,4,4,2,+10=47
1, 1, 2=4
Resolve 1d6+2
6, 2=8
Government 3d6+6
1, 3, 2, 6=12
Survival 4d6+4
4, 4, 4, 6, 4=22
Beast Handling 3d6+3
3, 2, 6, 3=14
Art 3d6+6 +1d6
3, 4, 6, 5, 6=24
Sincere Negotiator 4d6+8
6, 5, 3, 5, 8=27
Qi 10d6+10
2,2,5,5,6,4,3,4,4,2,+10=47
...I have no idea what any of that means. None. We rolled 2d6+2 for intelligence and got a 4. Seems bad! I guess... Ling Qi is dumb now? Or something. I don't know:
1. What Attribute XP is applied to
2. How much a single role of 4 versus the maximum possible roll of 14 makes a difference.
3. How many chances we might have to roll it.
4. What the narrative or powers impact would be
NO CLUE.
But anyway:
First item in the plan vote. How many stones will you use?
...to do what? How much effect do stones have on Cultivation? Are we just looking to spend as many as we can? I've been reading this story for years, and I couldn't tell you.
(Huge shrug motion) I guess 30 dice is better than 20, but I have no idea if it's worth the stones.
HAHAHAHHAHAHA. Yeah.
This might be something I could weigh in on. What skills do I think Ling Qi should concentrate on given the things she has been trying to do in the narrative. But in a format like this? I have no idea how that example plan is even built. Do we have a certain amount of dice to assign? Is the number of dice 40? Why are attribute training and skill training from the same dice pool? How do these dice work, anyway? How many successes do you need to advance something? Why is Woodwind listed on its own line while all the other skills are on a single line?
So yeah, it should be no surprise that I saw that vote, shrugged, and went, "None of my business."
If you want to get most of the thread invested, votes need to be simple to understand where we're picking from a limited option list and the consequences of each option are easy to understand.
Kingdom of Sands
I am glad that the intrigues of court are treating you well Bond Sister! As to my own situation, I must apologize for the lateness of this letter, my situation did not allow me to write for some time. To pick up where my correspondence left off, my journey into the far north, following the great triangle current had been going well. There were no more than the usual number of attacks from the Sea Folk upon my ship, and the deal I bartered with one of their chiefs even allowed a stretch of some hundred leagues to pass in peace. There was a bit of trouble as we rounded the northern point near the shattered lands where the Bronze Men make their homes among the arcadian forests of those innumerable isles.
A leviathan of the deep of a sort which I had never seen apparently mistook my ship for a snack! It resembled in some ways those little tentacled creatures the Xuan like to fry up, but of supremely greater size. I'd estimate it capable of dragging under an adult Xuan Wu by size alone, let alone it's cultivation. Luckily, it was not quite ready for me! It's arms were mighty, and its powers potent, but after I had dragged it into the sky and crashed it back into the ocean floor, it fled, wounded by my glory. Unfortunately, our battle had sent my ship far off course and damaged the hull, and I myself was feeling a bit winded.
As my crew and I were drifting on the ocean, pondering our predicament, we sighted a strange ship on the starboard horizon. It was an odd thing, not like the Bronze Men's ships. Frankly it looked to be more suited as a river barge than an ocean ship, and it was carved from white stone. If it did not cut through the waves with such imperturbable stability I would think it's makers foolish indeed. It bore a sigil of gleaming gold upon its sail, depicting a strange insect bearing aloft a solar disc.
Naturally, I hailed them. I had heard from my time among the Bronze Men of a great kingdom of stone to their west, which only the bravest of their heroes dared to challenge to honorable war. I was intending to search for their lands anyway, so it seemed that Lady Fortune has favored me! I was able to communicate with their captain, a friendly chap, who went by the name Ahkom. I always keep some gifts and exotic provisions on board, and an offering of preserved meats from the southern empire were enough to get the rights to berthing and the chance to make repairs to the ship.
It was a bit of a trying experience I must admit, I accompanied Ahkom. His gregariousness helped once we had deciphered each other's tongues, but that ship of White Stone… it was unsettling. You see it's captain was the only person aboard. It's crew were composed of what in the Stone Men's tongue translates best to 'dregs'. They were shaped like men sure enough but it quickly became clear that they were not. Ahkom found it quite humorous when I tried to talk to some of their number.
Dreg's it seems are the result of failures in their early cultivation, their method is dangerous to new practitioners and risks destruction of the mind, reducing them to something akin to those jittering automata the Jin have begun to deploy in their mines. Of course, they still have the needs of men, watching several of them tear into a side of bloody meat like animals is not a sight I'll soon forget.
I learned more of the Stone Men, or the Kingdom of Kem as they call themselves. The reason the bronze men knew them so little is that their kingdom was closed to foreigners. Only by direct word of their highest priest-who is also their king- could a foreigner be allowed to set foot in the lands of Kem. My friend Ahkom here, was a member of a priesthood which served a god by the name of Pteru, who as their god of travels was swallowed to settle islands in the straights and have dealings on the seas.
A wonderful little work around if I do say so myself.
I found things more agreeable once we had landed on the shores of Akhom's island outpost, although there were still very many dregs, there were at last other people of Ahkom's type as well. I must tell you now, they are a striking people. I spotted not a single adult who was shorter than I, and you know that I am not a short man! Their manner of dress would likely make your precious courtiers faint and even the matriarchs raise an eyebrow. Their primary garb is composed of sheer white linens, wrapped close around the body; it conceals little, particularly in the spray of the shore. They seem very fond of jewelry as well, bangles, anklets and an odd thing worn about the neck being most common. Both men and women make extensive use of cosmetic paints and oils which enhance the features and make their skin gleam like burnished bronze.
It was strange though, that I saw no mortals at all, there were only dregs to do the mundane work. Ahkom explained this to me by the fact that his outpost was not great enough to host a temple of the gods upon it, and as such there was no need for 'sleepers' here. Inquiring on this I found more of the Kingdoms structure revealed. It is well and good to say that cultivators stand above mortals, this is objectively true after all. However, the people of Kem see the society of mortals and the society of the Awoken to be entirely separate. Mortals have their own governance and society within Kem, connected only by the priests of the gods. Only once a year when youth may present themselves to the temples to attempt cultivation do the mortals of Khem directly interact with cultivators.
This lead to further questions to my erstwhile companion of course, and I swiftly came to realize that there had been some misconceptions between us. When good Ahkom spoke of his gods, he was not referring to a great spirit dwelling beyond the material world, but instead something more akin to our own ancestor, the Reveler. I came to this realization after Ahkom had asked of my own people, and I spoke of Him. He even found the idea of our ancestors jaunts in avatar form to be unsurprising.
Except of course, that these ancestors were men and not beasts. A troubling assertion, but not one which I was able to politely interrogate. In any case, I stayed with them for some weeks making repairs and learning just how vigorous and friendly my new hosts could be. Delightfully, I found that for once I had found a people who share our views on the sharing of joy and love. Not a single angry husband or wife to be found! It seemed that only certain religious roles required such bindings.
My visit was extended though, as I found myself receiving an invitation to Pteru's temple, it lay only a short distance off the coast of Kem, and was the closest a foreigner could come to that land without their King's permission. The hierarch of Pteru, that being his active representative in the mortal world, was interested in hearing of the Empire.
Allow me an aside on Kemnian kingship, it is an odd triple thing. At the top is the King of the Gods, the mighty ancestor who founded their land, but below him is the 'Greater Pharaoh' who is his descendant and takes the part of actively ruling the realm. He also 'becomes the God' at some point, which I did not quite understand. A euphemism for the afterlife or ascension perhaps? Regardless beneath him is the 'Lesser Pharaoh' who rules the mortals, he is the exception to the rule excluding cultivators from mortal life, for he must also be descended from the King of Gods. There seems to be some limitations on his ability to cultivate though. Once again I could not properly interrogate.
But, leaving that conundrum aside, my visit to the Great Temple! It was visible from the horizon, a great complex of gleaming marble and gold, taking up over a third of the not small, island's surface. Below it was a beautiful terrace overlooking the harbor, containing a city of marble and painted in riotous color, flanked by a pair of statues some two hundred meters in height, depicting a young man with green skin and hands outstretched in welcome. Naturally I could sense the power in the guardian statues, those welcoming arms would become a barrier of truly mighty proportion if things were violent.
I glimpsed the mortal settlements lying on the far side during my stay as well. They had their own, much more modest harbor, but to my surprise, despite Ahkom's disregard for mortals, they did not seem any less prosperous than the mortal folk of the Empire. Perhaps more so than most places. I suppose there is something to be said of leaving them to their own devices, protected from the actions of cultivators.
The Hierarch was Pteru was a jovial man, which seemed common among his followers. There was some confusion at first when I thought he was a woman, but no, I was assured that the Hierarch was always a man, despite whatever he may have been born as. At least when acting in an official role. This was also true for the Pharaoh, I learned, although before they had always been a woman? Something about the rising of Aseti and the setting of Amuret. Theology confuses me, but apparently the mantle of King of the Gods sometimes shifted between the gods. That seemed quite unstable to me, but my hosts seemed to regard it as normal and natural.
I was feasted quite well, in the week that I stayed at the temple, receiving close attention from the Hierarch as I was questioned about the Empire. Naturally I made sure to give him a good impression of us. He seemed much disappointed by the distance which lay between us, but also resolved to see one of his sons pay a visit. I made sure to warn him of the Jin, it was easy enough, I just told him that our emperor had a similar arrangement to their Pharaoh, and that any ships should dock among the Xuan.
Wouldn't want those flat heads on the coast making a poor impression.
In any case, once I had taken my leave to sail south I was free to compose this letter to you, Bond Sister. By the time it arrives I should be only a few months from port. So, following up from your last letter. Tell me about this business with Crown Prince An?
-Excerpt from a letter by Zheng Lu, King of Explorers
AN: Just gonna sneak the public commission release in here, thank you for the feedback so far
A leviathan of the deep of a sort which I had never seen apparently mistook my ship for a snack! It resembled in some ways those little tentacled creatures the Xuan like to fry up, but of supremely greater size. I'd estimate it capable of dragging under an adult Xuan Wu by size alone, let alone it's cultivation. Luckily, it was not quite ready for me! It's arms were mighty, and its powers potent, but after I had dragged it into the sky and crashed it back into the ocean floor, it fled, wounded by my glory. Unfortunately, our battle had sent my ship far off course and damaged the hull, and I myself was feeling a bit winded.
As my crew and I were drifting on the ocean, pondering our predicament, we sighted a strange ship on the starboard horizon. It was an odd thing, not like the Bronze Men's ships. Frankly it looked to be more suited as a river barge than an ocean ship, and it was carved from white stone. If it did not cut through the waves with such imperturbable stability I would think it's makers foolish indeed. It bore a sigil of gleaming gold upon its sail, depicting a strange insect bearing aloft a solar disc.
Naturally, I hailed them. I had heard from my time among the Bronze Men of a great kingdom of stone to their west, which only the bravest of their heroes dared to challenge to honorable war. I was intending to search for their lands anyway, so it seemed that Lady Fortune has favored me! I was able to communicate with their captain, a friendly chap, who went by the name Ahkom. I always keep some gifts and exotic provisions on board, and an offering of preserved meats from the southern empire were enough to get the rights to berthing and the chance to make repairs to the ship.
It was a bit of a trying experience I must admit, I accompanied Ahkom. His gregariousness helped once we had deciphered each other's tongues, but that ship of White Stone… it was unsettling. You see it's captain was the only person aboard. It's crew were composed of what in the Stone Men's tongue translates best to 'dregs'. They were shaped like men sure enough but it quickly became clear that they were not. Ahkom found it quite humorous when I tried to talk to some of their number.
Dreg's it seems are the result of failures in their early cultivation, their method is dangerous to new practitioners and risks destruction of the mind, reducing them to something akin to those jittering automata the Jin have begun to deploy in their mines. Of course, they still have the needs of men, watching several of them tear into a side of bloody meat like animals is not a sight I'll soon forget.
I learned more of the Stone Men, or the Kingdom of Kem as they call themselves. The reason the bronze men knew them so little is that their kingdom was closed to foreigners. Only by direct word of their highest priest-who is also their king- could a foreigner be allowed to set foot in the lands of Kem. My friend Ahkom here, was a member of a priesthood which served a god by the name of Pteru, who as their god of travels was swallowed to settle islands in the straights and have dealings on the seas.
A wonderful little work around if I do say so myself.
I found things more agreeable once we had landed on the shores of Akhom's island outpost, although there were still very many dregs, there were at last other people of Ahkom's type as well. I must tell you now, they are a striking people. I spotted not a single adult who was shorter than I, and you know that I am not a short man! Their manner of dress would likely make your precious courtiers faint and even the matriarchs raise an eyebrow. Their primary garb is composed of sheer white linens, wrapped close around the body; it conceals little, particularly in the spray of the shore. They seem very fond of jewelry as well, bangles, anklets and an odd thing worn about the neck being most common. Both men and women make extensive use of cosmetic paints and oils which enhance the features and make their skin gleam like burnished bronze.
It was strange though, that I saw no mortals at all, there were only dregs to do the mundane work. Ahkom explained this to me by the fact that his outpost was not great enough to host a temple of the gods upon it, and as such there was no need for 'sleepers' here. Inquiring on this I found more of the Kingdoms structure revealed. It is well and good to say that cultivators stand above mortals, this is objectively true after all. However, the people of Kem see the society of mortals and the society of the Awoken to be entirely separate. Mortals have their own governance and society within Kem, connected only by the priests of the gods. Only once a year when youth may present themselves to the temples to attempt cultivation do the mortals of Khem directly interact with cultivators.
This lead to further questions to my erstwhile companion of course, and I swiftly came to realize that there had been some misconceptions between us. When good Ahkom spoke of his gods, he was not referring to a great spirit dwelling beyond the material world, but instead something more akin to our own ancestor, the Reveler. I came to this realization after Ahkom had asked of my own people, and I spoke of Him. He even found the idea of our ancestors jaunts in avatar form to be unsurprising.
Except of course, that these ancestors were men and not beasts. A troubling assertion, but not one which I was able to politely interrogate. In any case, I stayed with them for some weeks making repairs and learning just how vigorous and friendly my new hosts could be. Delightfully, I found that for once I had found a people who share our views on the sharing of joy and love. Not a single angry husband or wife to be found! It seemed that only certain religious roles required such bindings.
My visit was extended though, as I found myself receiving an invitation to Pteru's temple, it lay only a short distance off the coast of Kem, and was the closest a foreigner could come to that land without their King's permission. The hierarch of Pteru, that being his active representative in the mortal world, was interested in hearing of the Empire.
Allow me an aside on Kemnian kingship, it is an odd triple thing. At the top is the King of the Gods, the mighty ancestor who founded their land, but below him is the 'Greater Pharaoh' who is his descendant and takes the part of actively ruling the realm. He also 'becomes the God' at some point, which I did not quite understand. A euphemism for the afterlife or ascension perhaps? Regardless beneath him is the 'Lesser Pharaoh' who rules the mortals, he is the exception to the rule excluding cultivators from mortal life, for he must also be descended from the King of Gods. There seems to be some limitations on his ability to cultivate though. Once again I could not properly interrogate.
But, leaving that conundrum aside, my visit to the Great Temple! It was visible from the horizon, a great complex of gleaming marble and gold, taking up over a third of the not small, island's surface. Below it was a beautiful terrace overlooking the harbor, containing a city of marble and painted in riotous color, flanked by a pair of statues some two hundred meters in height, depicting a young man with green skin and hands outstretched in welcome. Naturally I could sense the power in the guardian statues, those welcoming arms would become a barrier of truly mighty proportion if things were violent.
I glimpsed the mortal settlements lying on the far side during my stay as well. They had their own, much more modest harbor, but to my surprise, despite Ahkom's disregard for mortals, they did not seem any less prosperous than the mortal folk of the Empire. Perhaps more so than most places. I suppose there is something to be said of leaving them to their own devices, protected from the actions of cultivators.
The Hierarch was Pteru was a jovial man, which seemed common among his followers. There was some confusion at first when I thought he was a woman, but no, I was assured that the Hierarch was always a man, despite whatever he may have been born as. At least when acting in an official role. This was also true for the Pharaoh, I learned, although before they had always been a woman? Something about the rising of Aseti and the setting of Amuret. Theology confuses me, but apparently the mantle of King of the Gods sometimes shifted between the gods. That seemed quite unstable to me, but my hosts seemed to regard it as normal and natural.
I was feasted quite well, in the week that I stayed at the temple, receiving close attention from the Hierarch as I was questioned about the Empire. Naturally I made sure to give him a good impression of us. He seemed much disappointed by the distance which lay between us, but also resolved to see one of his sons pay a visit. I made sure to warn him of the Jin, it was easy enough, I just told him that our emperor had a similar arrangement to their Pharaoh, and that any ships should dock among the Xuan.
Wouldn't want those flat heads on the coast making a poor impression.
In any case, once I had taken my leave to sail south I was free to compose this letter to you, Bond Sister. By the time it arrives I should be only a few months from port. So, following up from your last letter. Tell me about this business with Crown Prince An?
-Excerpt from a letter by Zheng Lu, King of Explorers
AN: Just gonna sneak the public commission release in here, thank you for the feedback so far
@Briefvoice I mean, all of that is on the frontpage under Tutorials. So I guess that is more on you not wanting to learn then the actual system tbh.