A/N: Commission Number Nine, and we're back to the wonderous world of Kong Ves! As always, if you are unfamilliar, just go read the rest of the 'Kong Ves In' stories. Otherwise, you're going to be confused as fuck.
The first Kong Ves chapter can be found here. The previous one is here.
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Imagine stubbing your toe. Sucks, right? But then imagine stubbing it again- and again and again and again. Imagine stubbing your toe so many times that you're in a perpetual state of stubbing. Then imagine it's not one toe, it's all of them. At once. It's your entire foot. No, it's both feet. No, it's both feet and your hands. Every single finger and toe you possess is just in a constant state of jamming. And then imagine that it's not your fingers and toes at all. It's your lungs and your heart and even your balls a little bit. It's the same sensation as everything getting jammed, but it's inside you.
Oh, and also, those same things are being hit repeatedly by planes out on a carpet bombing run.
If you can picture all of that, you have the barest idea of just how much it fucking
sucks to take the Soldier's Step.
But take it I do. It takes everything I have, and a whole bunch of shit that I don't but somehow managed to fake, but by the end of the process I've got a burning ball of energy buried deep inside my groin. And when I stand up, shaking two days worth of sweat and no small amount of blood from my body as I do, all of the pain is worth it.
I'm faster. I'm stronger. I even feel a tiny bit smarter, hard as that might be to imagine. It feels like a fucking power line has been connected right to my spine, supercharging everything about me. My mind feels more alert, my reflexes more crisp, my body more in control. All the aches and pains I've built up since my vacation in Kong Zhi's body start to fade away. It won't be long until it's like they never existed.
Suck it, soda. Kiss my ass, coffee. Energy drinks can go get fucked. If you really want to be more awake, Anam is the only way to go.
Of course, my teammates take my new pain-free state as a challenge. They barely wait until we leave Gladiator's Rest before they're dragging me into an empty chamber for actual training. And once we're there…
Well, it was nice being pain free, but it doesn't last for long.
Nokai and Mei Daiyu seem to enjoy my power as a Soldier even more than I do. But while I like it because it makes me feel like a fucking god, they seem to enjoy it because it means they can kick my ass six times as hard. Literally ten fucking minutes after getting out of the wonder, I'm flat on my back in a brand new crater with the front of my robes in tatters. And that's just the start.
I don't know how long the pain that these sadistic fucks call training goes on. It feels like every time I even twitch, one of the two of them is there ready to throw me back down and/or tear a new chunk out of me. I don't get a break. There is no reprieve. All I get is pain from Mei Daiyu, pain from Nokai, or pain from both at the same time if they're feeling
extra sadistic.
No 'training' can go on forever though. Eventually, my friends need to call it a day. Everyone needs to sleep, and besides, they have other shit to do besides beating the absolute fuck out of me. The three of us make our way back to the central cavern and split, all of us heading our own way with plans to meet back up tomorrow for Fensui's class.
Both Nokai and Mei Daiyu are completely fucking gassed. They trudge back to their homes looking like they're dragging rocks behind them. My money is on them passing out about five seconds after their heads hit the pillow. Apparently kicking the fuck out of me is good exercise.
As for me? I'm in fucking
pain, but I feel surprisingly perky. Still! Apparently meditating and forcing energy into your groin for a day followed by having the everloving shit kicked out of you for at least eight hours ain't shit on the Core of the Sunkissed Vanguard. Sure, I'm a little tired, but the kind of tired that you get when it's time to go back to work after your lunch break. All I need is a little grub and I'll be ready for more.
Thankfully, I know right where to go for a good meal. All I have to do is head home.
While a number of homes in the Ninth Circle Courtyard are dark and quiet, mine is glowing with light and full of sweet smells. The scent of baking bread washes over me as I open the front door, washing away half my aches and pains on it's own. The baking smells are only the beginning, a blanket that lays atop the mouthwatering scent of roasting meat and heavy spices.
Ming Hui himself is a near typhoon in the midst of all his creations. As I walk through the door, I see him deglazing a pan, pulling two loaves of bread out of the oven, and tossing the greens all in one quick, smooth motion. He spins in place and kicks the oven door closed as he pivots, bending low to scoop fresh eggs out of a bowl on the counter. He cracks them with sure gestures, dropping them down in the pan right next to the sizzling meat. I glance over his shoulder to take in his dish as I walk.
...is that fucking Steak and Eggs? Fuck yeah! I can go for Steak and Eggs!
"Have a seat, Kong Zhi!" Ming Hui declares, not even bothering to ask if I actually want to eat- because of course I do. "It will be ready in three shakes of the spice grinder!"
That was not a figure of speech. As I drop down in my seet, Ming Hui produces a grinder loaded with something fragrant and
wonderful and dusts the entire pan with it three times. Another quick, too-perfect motion drops the meal onto a plate and sends it sliding down the table until it stops right in front of me with perfect accuracy.
I stare down at my still-sizzling meal and then look back up at Ming Hui. "What?" I deadpan. "No drink?"
In answer, an earthenware mug practically appears in front of me, sides beading with condensation. A quick glance reveals it full to the brim with dark juice that I suspect pairs perfectly with the plate before me. "Okay, now you're just showing off."
"A touch," Ming Hui answers. He finishes his labors in record time and joins me, sitting down across from me at the table. "But mostly, I need to practice my form. There are countless rare ingredients to be had within the Heart and I will not lose my chance at them."
I stare at him as I eat, luxuriating in the glorious taste before me even as I try to follow his words. "I beg your pardon, but I find myself confused," I say in between bites of sumptuous prepared beef. "How precisely will your cooking skills assist you in gaining ingredients?"
Ming Hui stares at me as if he's re-evaluating my intelligence. "Because others are going to have them," he tells me as if it's the most obvious thing in the world. "Just as I have my own warchest. Sooner or later, I am going to have something that someone wants or someone else is going to have what I need. A challenge is inevitable- and when I cross knives with someone, I want to be ready."
Oh. Right. Cooking duels. In all the pain and drama, I'd nearly forgotten how fucking
weird my world is now. "Of course," I answer. "Where
is my mind. But yes, my thanks for the food. It is my good fortune to have you as my roommate."
Ming Hui waves aside my praise. "Oh, no. For eating such a subpar effort, truly I should be thanking you! Honestly, what
was I thinking? Frying the steak fresh out of the icebox? I should have allowed it to reach room temperature before I even cracked the eggs. And the plating is
atrocious. Not to mention the eggs are basically burned. I did all I could to salvage the breakfast, but there is a limit to my skills."
He shakes his head mournfully. "I will have to remake this dish at a future time when I have acquired ingredients worthy of it. On that day, I hope that I can count on you to serve as my taster."
Yeah, I'm pretty sure he's full of shit, because the steak is a perfect pink in the center, and the eggs have a yolk so orange and unctuous that breaking it produces viscous flow that would probably show up in an influencer's feed. You know...if influencers or the internet existed here. What would the equivalent be? Food paintings? Yeah, it'd light the fuck out of a scroll.
He knows this is fucking great and is just fishing for praise. Still, it is great, and he deserves the praise. "I find it hard to believe that you will be able to improve upon such perfection, but when that day comes you will find me your most eager test subject. Simply let me know when and where. I will be certain to be there."
Ming Hui absorbs my words and beams with pride. I take the opportunity to finish off the meal, using the last bites of steak to mop up the eggs and shove them in my cramhole. "And if you require aid to reach your vision, please do not hesitate in calling upon me," I finish through a mouthful. "I will be pleased to do whatever I can to assist you."
Seriously, I
need to see one of these cooking duels. I will soux chef the fuck out of one if I can- fuck, I'll pay for the priviledge. What's a fair exchange to be in the kitchen when someone's going full Shokugeki? All of my money? Or will I have to earn more? I'll probably have to earn more.
But Ming Hui cannot see inside of my head. "No, no, you need not worry over payment! The simple joy of cooking and the experience I gain through the process is more than enough for me."
Now it's my turn to brush aside his words. "It very well may be," I answer. "But still, I would feel churlish if I were not given the opportunity to assist you as you have assisted me. Please, on my honor, allow me to render what little aid I am capable of."
I have no idea the fuck I'm saying, but it's enough to send Ming Hui back on his heels. The rotund chef ponders my words before reluctantly nodding. "Of course," he answers. "If you
insist, there is one thing that I would welcome assistance in- as long as it is not too much trouble, of course."
"Please, name it."
Ming Hui turns an eye towards the kitchen. "This is a marvelous kitchen, but it is…"
He trails off as he struggles for the words. "Small?" I throw out, trying to help him find whatever he's searching for. "Understocked?"
"...stationary."
I have to stop and blink at that one. "Stationary?"
"Yes, exactly!" he continues. "I can make most any dish I can think of here, but
only here. To allow my skills even the smallest bit of space outside of the kitchen, I must carry the kitchen on my back at all times- and no matter how many things I can hold, I will still be missing something. So there is no way as of right now for me to utilize my full abilities outside this room."
"But I have heard tales of charms specially made for chefs in my predicament- charms that are capable of carrying an entire kitchen within them and simply need to be activated to bring it out. Is there any way you can assist me in the procurement of such a charm- if it is not too much trouble, of course."
Oh. Right. Of course.
Charmcrafting.
In all the hubbub of today- the last few days really- I'd fucking forgot all about Charmcrafting. Everything else had just seemed so much more important, what with Huo Shi and Nokai and Mei Daiyu and all. Charmcrafting had fallen right out of my mind!
Can I even make a charm? That's some real hardcore shit there. Kong Zhi studied his entire life to be able to do what he can do, and while I've got some parts of Kong Zhi in me, I don't know if his decade plus of training is part of it. Fuck.
I rack my brain, searching desperately for the knowledge. Nothing. Shit fuck damn. Auntie Bi is going to
murder my soul! And all because I have no idea how to carve an impression marking three millimeters from the important storage glyph to avoid anam contamination or how to use a slightly broken effect array to grant a charm multiple states of use! That's knowledge that can't be taught in the Heart- I can only get it from…
Wait. How the fuck did I know what any of that even was?
Oh. Oh here it is. Nope. Never mind. Knowledge is here!
"Ming Hui, it would be my honor to assist you in the creation of a kitchen charm. Simply bring me the things you wish to have stored and I shall bring your idea to life."
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Enjoying Kong Ves? The next one can be found here!