A/N: A big thanks to the 46 people who have pledged to me on Patreon! If you'd like to join them, you can do so here. Or, if you'd like to support me without the monthly commitment, you can buy me a cup of Ko-Fi here.
It's commission time, everyone! Today, the request was a bit of a different one. Our current commissioner wanted to know what nobody's favorite Kong, Kong De, does for the family and to see him on the job. So on the job we will see him! I hope you enjoy this look at the Kong Family Fixer as he goes about his duties.
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Kong De would never,
ever admit it, but part of him treasures the times he is called upon to fix his cousin's mistakes.
His work in the Cerulean Summer is rewarding and fulfilling, of course, but it can be done by almost anyone of a certain threshold. One set of hands that has reached a certain rank is as good as another in the eyes of the Elders, and Kong De is no exception. But the tasks set upon him by the family?
For those, they can only call upon Kong De.
Not once has one of Aunt Ru's requests for aid asked if he has finally overcome his bottleneck. Auntie Bi has not mentioned his lack of advancement even a single time. Uncle Fang only cares for what is between his ears, not in his channels, and the relief in Cousin Bowen's voice every time he hears that Kong De will prioritize his request is enough to make the younger Farmer feel as if he could float on air without a technique.
And then there is the work itself. The tasks given to Kong De by the Summer are… fine. They are fine. Kong De has never once complained about a duty given to him by his Elders. But they are all so…
similar. This tincture needs to be brewed. That Spirit Beast must be slain. The same representative from the March needs to be escorted through the waves. It has reached the point where Kong De could finish his tasks with his eyes closed- and has done just that on several occasions, which at least caused an interesting discussion when escorting the March's scout.
The same cannot be said for the problems caused by the next generation of Kong. They cause problems as numerous and as varied as the stars in the sky! Cousin Cui's enmeshment with the Wan clan was a thorny patch of brambles that had needed every ounce of Kong De's political acumen to conclude in a satisfying manner. Cousin Bowen's predicament with the bureaucracy of Merciful Rest had required similar maneuvering and a quick hunt to raise the capital needed to pay off the indenture board on top of it. And Cousin Shi… it had taken every last drop of Kong De's guile to keep him from winding up adopted by a family of Spirit Snakes. How does one even find themself in that situation?!
So yes, Kong De may, one day, in the darkest hours of the night, be forced to confront the fact that he rather enjoys fixing some of the problems caused by his cousins.
Most of the problems.
Others? Not so much.
The ones Cousin Zhi brings are just plain irritating.
Not for the first time since entering the offices of General's Grave's Lord Inspector, Kong De shifts uncomfortably in his seat. He barely bites back a groan as the uneven wood digs into his spine in just the perfect way to send a shiver of discomfort down his left leg. Again, he fights back the urge to tap his core- not much, just enough to wash away the discomfort- but just barely. To cycle now would be to admit weakness, and his position here is tenuous enough as it is.
Instead, he stands and strides to the front of the room. Behind a desk sits an older Artist, streaks of silver shining through her hair as she makes careful notes on a scroll with a brush clenched in gnarled fingers, pretending to all the world as if she has not been watching Kong De like a hawk for the past six hours.
"Beg pardon," the Kong begins for the third time so far today. "May I ask how much longer it will be?"
The gray-hair pauses in her calligraphy and looks up at Kong De, staring at him with a piercing gaze over thick spectacles. "You may," she allows after a few moments of consideration. "But the answer has not changed since you last asked. Lord Inspector Kuy is a
very busy man." She does not actually say 'unlike
some people', but the implication is loud enough that it almost makes Kong De's ears ring.
"His work is vital in maintaining General's Grave," the grey-hair continues. "And he is devoted to it. If you wish to meet with him, you will have to wait until he can find the time to see you. If you would rather leave a message, I would be honored to see that he gets it."
Kong De highly doubts that. Any message he leaves will grace the matronly woman's desk for mere moments before it meets with a mysterious accident similar to the one suffered by the last six notes he left. He shakes his head and swallows a sigh before rocking back on his heels. "My thanks, but I am content to wait," Kong De states.
One silver eyebrow climbs the older woman's forehead. "Do you, perhaps, find some fault in my ability to convey a simple message, Lord Kong?" she states, warning loud in her tone. "I assure you, it would reach Lord Inspector Kuy at his earliest possible convenience."
"Surely it would," Kong De responds, mentally patting himself on the back for not clenching his teeth as he speaks. "But I have already waited this long, and it would be churlish to depart at this juncture. A Kong never leaves a task half-finished, after all."
The Lord Inspector's gatekeeper is too restrained to let out an annoyed huff, but she deliberately turns back to her papers with the air of an aggrieved cat which is enough for Kong De to claim a small victory. The taste of success buoys his spirits as he turns away from the desk and moves back to the horrifyingly uncomfortable chair. He does not sit in it, however. The thing seems to have been designed as a low-grade instrument of torture. Standing is much preferable to sitting in it once more.
And so the hours pass. Kong De stands motionless in the receiving chamber as the sun slowly sets on General's Grave. The grey-hair continues pouring over the same scroll again and again, not seeming to pay him an ounce of attention. And back behind her, Lord Inspector Kuy lurks in his office, doing his utmost to avoid meeting with the Kong Family representative.
Until finally, the Lord Inspector can take no more. He has not emerged from his office since Kong De ensconced himself in the receiving chamber, meaning he has not left since before the sun first rose. He has likely not eaten, unless he is the type of man to carry travel rations to his station, he has not visited the water closet, and he is such a marginal Soldier that such things likely bother him. Not to mention that there is only so much boredom a mind can endure, and he has likely long since exhausted all forms of distraction. Eventually, he has no choice but to casually wander out into the receiving room and 'suddenly notice' Kong De waiting there for him.
Geng Kuy, Lord Inspector for General's Grave, looks as if he was born middle-aged. The corners of his eyes bear deep wrinkles, hair has long since begun fleeing his head, and he walks with the stiff gait of one unaccustomed to doing so for long. If Kong De couldn't detect the faint flickers of power deep within his core, he would suspect that he would pass into the grip of the ancestors at any moment. But while Geng Kui might barely be a Soldier, he still
is a Soldier, so he will likely live to torment many people for at least a few more years.
That is, if he does not rouse anyone's anger to the point where they demand justice be served. And considering how easily he made the decisions that brought Kong De to this city… the Kong suspects he will not be hobbling over this earth much longer.
Those wrinkled eyes glare at the gatekeeper, who just slumps slightly in her chair and drums her fingers on her desk. When glowering doesn't seem to make Kong De vanish into thin air, Geng Kui turns to him, the most fraudulent smile the Kong has ever seen sprouting on his face. "Good day, citizen!" he states. "My apologies for your wait. I am Lord Inspector Geng Kuy, and it is my pleasure to make your acquaintance day, sir…"
Kong De very deliberately does not answer that Geng Kui knows exactly who he is and why he's here, nor does he add on the dozen implications he has concocted about the man's parentage, business practices, and general hygiene. Instead he bows slightly and clasps hands with the loathsome toad. "It was no issue at all, good sir. I bear the good fortune to be Kong De of the Harmony Kongs. Perhaps you have received my letters?"
Geng Kui taps his finger to his lips as if in absent thought. "Kong… Kong… Kong… oh, yes! The charm peddlers! I remember now!" As Kong De fights to keep his reaction to the veiled slight hidden, the Lord Inspector shakes his head. "Though I cannot imagine why you would need to speak with me. I believe my last correspondence was most clear."
"The general message was indeed communicated, sir, but my Lord Kong still wishes to receive clarification on several points," Kong De responds. The effort of his faux smile is enough to make his cheeks cramp in pain, and he drops it in favor of bowing once more. "If I might beg but a moment of your time, you will hear no more from me."
The Lord Inspector studies Kong De for a long moment, clearly weighing actually speaking with Kong De against the promise of never having to do so again. Eventually, the former wins out. "Of course, of course, I will be thrilled to render whatever service I can." He turns and marches back into his office, leaving Kong De to nod at the gatekeeper before following him.
Geng Kuy drops down behind his desk as soon as he crosses the threshold, leaving Kong De to close the door behind him. "I am not certain what else your clan needs to hear," he states bluntly as the Kong turns to face him. "But since you have made the trip, I will say it again: there is no place in General's Grave for the Kong maker mark."
Kong De does not sit down in the chair opposite Geng Kuy's desk. It looks to be of a similar make to those in the receiving chamber, and his back has suffered enough today. Instead he leans against the wall and crosses his arms. "Yes, you were most vociferous on that point in your messages," he answers. "But the reasoning was… vague, at best. Perhaps you could clarify
why we are not welcome so that we may alleviate the issue in the future."
A far-thinner, far more honest smile crosses Geng Kuy's face. "The market simply cannot accommodate any new vendors at this time," he states bluntly, not even pretending to mask the lie in his voice. "The clans of General's Grave are all exceedingly satisfied by the Jin and Suro clans. Perhaps when the city expands, we will have more space for… outsiders."
"I see," Kong De responds, face blank. "It is nothing personal. It is simply that the entire city of General's Grave… every single clan represented in it… every last open market… every
single soul in the city… has no interest in our wares."
Geng Kuy simply blinks in response, and Kong De begins to wonder if he perhaps has a Spirit Toad in his ancestry. "Yes, I do indeed see," he repeats himself. "The city… is full. That makes perfect sense. And this has
nothing to do with interactions between Geng Zen's youngest and Lord Shuren's heir in the Delving Heart."
"Of course not," Geng Kuy responds promptly. "The Lord Inspector's office is not moved by the petty actions of
children. This is a business decision, nothing less and nothing more."
"Though," the glorified bureaucrat continued after a moment. "It is said that the way a clan raises their children says a great deal about that clan as a whole. If one raised and steeped in a clan's traditions is to act unruly, that would certainly cast a pall over the clan as a whole, wouldn't it? We all represent something greater than ourselves, now matter how weak or powerful we are in our own right. If you think that perhaps a scion of your clan is acting poorly, correcting such behavior would not go amiss."
Kong De barely suppresses a snort. "Better men than I have attempted to steer the main branch in productive ways."
"Then perhaps one more suited should make the next attempt," Geng Kuy states. "I know that if my own daughter acted in a manner ill-befitting the Geng, matters would be in hand within the hour. Allowing a child to so poorly reflect on your name is… not conducive to profitable relationships."
For a second, Kong De mulls over Geng Kuy's words. But he has to shake his head. "No, Lord Inspector, I do not think that will happen."
"No matter," Geng Kuy states, half rising from his seat. "It was merely an idle thought. As I said before, General's Grave is-"
"However, your words do bear some worth," Kong De continues, rushing over Geng Kuy's words as if he had not spoken. "After all, you are an expert in 'profitable relationships'. I would not dream of dismissing them out of hand- after all, look at the vast experience you have in such dealings!"
The Lord Inspector of General's Grave freezes. "What-"
"Just look at your most recent 'relationships'," Kong De continues. He flicks his wrist and his void ring spits out a page thick with ink anam. The Kong Family representative throws the page down on Geng Kuy's desk, allowing the portrait of living ink it contains to stare the Geng in the eye. "Why, who is that you were sneaking out to meet last night? She must be a
very valuable associate for you to spend so much time cultivating them- and with such finery, as well!"
"How did you-"
"I can only dream of what benefits she brings to the Geng," comes the idle interruption. "Though I do not have to dream, do I? I can simply ask other members of your august clan… could you perhaps introduce me to one?"
Kong De snaps his fingers as if something has just occurred to him. "Oh, do you know who would be the perfect person to speak with? Your honored wife, Geng Yu! She's an expert at connecting with assets through unconventional means- such as yourself! She was cunning enough to not only wed you, but to adopt you into the clan! Surely the insight she can shed on these negotiations would be
unparalleled."
Geng Kuy has turned the color of old chalk. "I… um… I…."
Now it's Kong De's turn to offer a thin smile. "Yes?" he asks. "Did you have some objection to involving your wife in these negotiations?"
"Er… what… I…"
Kong De can barely hold in a sigh.
Amateurs. One would think this is Geng Kuy's first time being blackmailed!
"My good Lord Inspector," he states bluntly. "I believe now is the time for you to sit back and find space in your markets for the Kong maker mark. Do you concur?"
The Lord Inspector of General's Grave swallows so loudly that it almost shakes Kong De's ears. "Um… why don't we discuss this matter further?"
"Good sir, I would like nothing more."
The tasks Cousin Zhi brings Kong De are irritating to the highest degree. But sometimes, the most satisfying feeling in the world is scratching an itch- and now, it is time for Kong De to finally soothe this irritation.
During moments like this one, Kong De has no issues at all in admitting that he
loves what he does for the family.
