punching gods is more effort than it's worth.

Go for the nutshot.
They deserve it.

"This is a time-honored tradition among the order of Manhunters on Mars." J'onn explained to the wizard. "In the countless years it has been in use, nothing has ever been recorded as going wrong."

That would be more reassuring if their other time-honored tradition wasn't: when things go wrong, pretend it never happened.
 
So, Al will NOT be creating an Internet for Wizards? Sparing himself the headache of SysAdmin.

Good call, leave it to those who take themselves far too seriously and have the sanity to spare. Like Mordenkainen!
 
Growing a 'blank' body that would be shaped by the soul put into it could... Honestly, it would be incredibly fair for people to ask questions if they came across the thing.

Oh man, even thinking "I hope nobody finds this" ensures someone finding it.

So who is the worst (best?) person to find a fleshy homunculus on an operating table?

Jinx? Probably the least amusing reaction, she'll be shocked for a few seconds, then shrug her shoulders, say "Al has a good reason every time he does something crazy", and then leave.

Al: "Aren't you going to ask me what's going on?"
Jinx: "No, you have a good reasons for your actions, and I trust you."
Al: (disappointed)
Jinx: (teasing) :ogles: "Oh? Did you want me to ask so you can show off how clever you are?"
Al: (shifty-eyes) :whistle: "...maybe..."

Kary? Not sure how she'd react.

Yuffie? Telling her NOT to go somewhere is a guarantee she'll try to sneak in.

Yuffie: "Guess what? I'M GOING TO BE A BIG SISTER!!!"
Jinx: (spit-take) :o :confused: :sour: ?!?!
Yuffie: (explains how she thinks clone-Alec will be her new little sister)
Jinx: (tries to get her heartbeat under control) :confused:


View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vDRAXlNYZB4
 
Swamp Thing and Poison Ivy.

Neither of which he would trust to watch a pet rock
Depending on the version of Alec Holland, Swamp Thing can be fairly agreeable. The Green would also be fine, the fundamentally semi-neutral magical force that it is (it's out for itself, but so is everything else). The Parliament of Trees that likes to think they are the Green? Not so much. Damn racist jumped up elementals with no understanding of how ecosystems actually work.

I do enjoy the times when Swamp Thing realises this and rips those suckers out

Poison Ivy? Well that reminds me. Someone to actually clean up her connection to the Green (horrifically messy as it is, or nonexistent depending on the timeline) could help her tell the difference between a plant absently noting that it's dying, or drowning, or on fire, and the panicked screams of children her feeble human mind translates them into.
 
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"On the other side of things, an elemental acting with the backing of the planet may be able to extract the full power of the orb without suffering negative side effects."

A group which only actively numbered a few that he could readily recall. Swamp Thing and Poison Ivy.

Neither of which he would trust to watch a pet rock.

"That seems... Less than ideal." Red Tornado admitted after several long moments.

I'm sure that if Alchemist thinks about it he might be able to come up with another "elemental acting with the backing of the planet" who is has a history of benevolent and heroic behavior—and is sitting literally right in front of him.

Is Alchemist making a private joke here about what he knows about Red Tornado origins—something that Red Tornado does not know himself? Or am I confused about continuity, and Earth-YJ's Red Tornado not an Air Elemental fused with a technological Android body?
 
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Final Fantasy X-2 accessories (Key to Success - Exp, GP, Item drops X2, Item Effects +100%, Luck +100, HP/MP +100%)
Corrections courtesy of Infinity Divided!
He used a coupon on that?

I would have voted for a Sheriff Star from the Wild Arms series.

Wild Arms: Accessories

Wild Arms Shrine - Your source for info on this PlayStation classic

Huge stat buffs + ribbon style immunity to all bad statuses + all elemental damage heals you + more.
Basically all the accessories rolled into one.
 
He used a coupon on that?

I would have voted for a Sheriff Star from the Wild Arms series.

Wild Arms: Accessories

Wild Arms Shrine - Your source for info on this PlayStation classic

Huge stat buffs + ribbon style immunity to all bad statuses + all elemental damage heals you + more.
Basically all the accessories rolled into one.

That is a very good choice. However he's already worked up making a piece of equipment that absorbs all elemental damage and uses it for healing. That plus the Super Ribbon effect like he's worked into things like the special ribbon he made for Kary and Wonder Woman has him covered for status debuffs.

Admittedly the stat buffs would be fantastic... But Alchemist's reasoning was actually the multipliers there being important. That doesn't say +100%, which would have basically been the same thing. It states X2. The GP doesn't matter, he's got more than he can spend, but for items and experience that's actually pretty big.
 
I'm sure that if Alchemist thinks about it he might be able to come up with another "elemental acting with the backing of the planet" who is has a history of benevolent and heroic behavior—and is sitting literally right in front of him.

Is Alchemist making a private joke here about what he knows about Red Tornado origins—something that Red Tornado does not know himself? Or am I confused about continuity, and Earth-YJ's Red Tornado not an Air Elemental fused with a technological Android body?
I am almost completely sure that YJ Red Tornado is completely technological.
 
What was the gamer protagonist you mentioned that ate Superman and then reality?

Harvest from Shaynet's "Kill Them All"

My first idea actually ended up being very similar. My original plan was for an OOC!Problem character to pop into worm. Figure out they're in Brockton Bay and realize "Absolutely everything is fucked. Especially me."

He'd end up managing to scrape by, start practicing religiously at a gun range... And catches the eye of Victor who notes that this individual has suspiciously good talent at using firearms. He offers to 'teach' the man so he can leach off of his gains.

The MC, having actual skill bars and system notices, quickly puts two and two together. Victor thinks he's got an ideal E88 candidate. MC thinks up how to murder some nazis. Cue up a dinner party with some pecan, almond and cyanide pie.
 
Harvest from Shaynet's "Kill Them All"

My first idea actually ended up being very similar. My original plan was for an OOC!Problem character to pop into worm. Figure out they're in Brockton Bay and realize "Absolutely everything is fucked. Especially me."

He'd end up managing to scrape by, start practicing religiously at a gun range... And catches the eye of Victor who notes that this individual has suspiciously good talent at using firearms. He offers to 'teach' the man so he can leach off of his gains.

The MC, having actual skill bars and system notices, quickly puts two and two together. Victor thinks he's got an ideal E88 candidate. MC thinks up how to murder some nazis. Cue up a dinner party with some pecan, almond and cyanide pie.
I mean, I wouldn't say no to a side-story or two…
 
Harvest from Shaynet's "Kill Them All"

My first idea actually ended up being very similar. My original plan was for an OOC!Problem character to pop into worm. Figure out they're in Brockton Bay and realize "Absolutely everything is fucked. Especially me."

He'd end up managing to scrape by, start practicing religiously at a gun range... And catches the eye of Victor who notes that this individual has suspiciously good talent at using firearms. He offers to 'teach' the man so he can leach off of his gains.

The MC, having actual skill bars and system notices, quickly puts two and two together. Victor thinks he's got an ideal E88 candidate. MC thinks up how to murder some nazis. Cue up a dinner party with some pecan, almond and cyanide pie.
Yeah that sounds like a really good spin off story.
 
offhand not sure I much understand alchemist worry about the big threats if they ever came to them he could just take an instant quest and train for a decade or two. Sure its not what one would want the most if the alternative is dealing with big darkseid or any other galaxy level or universal threat I assume he'd take it though right?
 
"...Thank you." Red Tornado said after they'd gotten out of earshot of the others. "My original limitations continue to ensure that I struggle when there are too many points of interest."

"Mine do too." Alchemist admitted once they'd gotten to the Ops Center. "Some folks are great at it, though."

Two Autistic Men looking at each other and thinking "finally, someone who gets me."
 
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