Magical Girl Escalation Taylor (Worm/Nanoha)

Okay, shit, fine. It's an easy fix. All I need to do is cut out the "You Died" pic and leave the ending ambiguous.
... if you're still killing Taylor, that's not actually fixing it. This is not the time to be ambiguous, this is the time to say 'yes' or 'no'. You've blown your goodwill and SOD with most of the playerbase, and you need to start earning that back.
 
So, question time. Even with the knowledge that the quest would continue with Taylor as the protagonist, how many of you want to see the ending of this chapter adjusted? If it's going to be that big of a problem, I can change it. This is supposed to be fun, after all.
I don't see any need to change the chapter from a perspective of 'death is a possible consequence and it won't even force you to switch to a new character'.

That said, I do think that having the TSAB going in guns blazing in lethal mode is more than a bit startling to me.
 
So, question time. Even with the knowledge that the quest would continue with Taylor as the protagonist, how many of you want to see the ending of this chapter adjusted? If it's going to be that big of a problem, I can change it. This is supposed to be fun, after all.
Usually quests' protagonists die because players ignore QM's hints and make several really bad decisions. Or because dice really hate them.
But well, I can't say Taylor's and Sam's death was fun, but I'm mostly okay with this.

I'm more interested in our reincarnation mechanic.
Will TSAB people just not recognise IAE and throw it out, so it could convert some random shmuck?
Will IAE convert the TSAB officer trying to take it away so fast that others'll have no time to react?
Or maybe IAE has in-built teleport to safety (Tim's lab, I presume)?
Or maybe we'll have big timeskip and IAE will activate again already on Midchilda?

That last thing could be !FUN!, actually.
"My name is TVaiyvlioor TaHkeabmearcthi, and I'll make my mamas and Dad proud of me by kilLiNg All ThE BeLkaNs."
 
Last edited:
won't even force you to switch to a new character'.
1. Yes it is.
2. It's also killing Samantha, who also doesn't get to transfer over.
I'm more interested in our reincarnation mechanic.
Then you should be seeking the best possible way to introduce that mechanic. Even you admit this wasn't enjoyable or how stuff normally runs.
That last thing could be !FUN!, actually.
"My name is TVaiyvlioor TaHkeabmearcthi, and I'll make my mamas and Dad proud of me by kilLiNg All ThE BeLkaNs."
Maybe in another story.
 
All said however, while I do agree that a never before seen villain from the point of view of the players essentially appearing out of nowhere without prior establishment as a character killing the PC is a poor form, I do however want to point out that had the villain been properly established prior, for instance in the first part of a two part fight that would allow players some preparation and familiarity, said villain should very much be able to kill the PC. After all, a games not much of a game without risk.


Besides, I'd rather more people directed their anger at the antagonists, not the author.
 
... if you're still killing Taylor, that's not actually fixing it. This is not the time to be ambiguous, this is the time to say 'yes' or 'no'. You've blown your goodwill and SOD with most of the playerbase, and you need to start earning that back.
I've stated that I'm changing the plan from Taylor dying and being reborn to her not dying at all. That's about as clear as I can possibly get.
 
I've stated that I'm changing the plan from Taylor dying and being reborn to her not dying at all. That's about as clear as I can possibly get.
her not dying at all.
Uh... not really. There's a bit of an issue with implications. First off,
So, question time. Even with the knowledge that the quest would continue with Taylor as the protagonist, how many of you want to see the ending of this chapter adjusted?
Nothing about what it'd be changed to. There's lots of ways that an 'adjustment' can do. The new ending might bring up new problems and/or retain old ones.

Secondly,
Okay, shit, fine. It's an easy fix. All I need to do is cut out the "You Died" pic and leave the ending ambiguous.
'clear' and 'ambiguous' are kinda antonyms.

Together, I think you can forgive me for getting the wrong impression.
EDIT: Oh, you meant the edited in author's note at the end of the chapter. Nobody gets alerts when you edit stuff, so unless someone went back to the chapter for whatever reason, nobody'd know it had happend.
 
Last edited:
I'm excited for the interlude explaining what exactly their plan was. I mean, ambushing someone and opening fire only to then tell the person they're attacking to stand down seems like these guys have no idea what they're doing. Either that or they want to be able to claim that "We asked her to stand down, but she refused" when their boss asks what happened.
 
…I'll be honest, I was expecting a little less hostile of a reaction to this chapter considering I had made it clear that it wouldn't be the end of the quest. There's a reason I took the image from Dark Souls, where character death is ultimately an inconvenience.

So, question time. Even with the knowledge that the quest would continue with Taylor as the protagonist, how many of you want to see the ending of this chapter adjusted? If it's going to be that big of a problem, I can change it. This is supposed to be fun, after all.
Let see where to begin.

There's only one mage who has contacted the TSAB who is a young girl. There is only one female mage flying around. Storm can translate and decided not to. They attacked said only female mage while obviously knowing that she would be trying to make slaves but so far there have been none. They called out to stand down, which would have worked if it weren't in a language that she doesn't understand unless she's a slave that wouldn't and that's not including that continued attack, which the trap could at least be forgiven. Then there's where they didn't both with getting in contact with their only contact on this world if they aren't checking in to ensure they're not slaves which would also include updates on the situation, area, and strategies in addition to what mages there are.

A not!Taylor, unless it's their brain being completely rewritten to be Taylor, wouldn't feel like Taylor and would just basically be a midstory Retcon. Even then it would just feel like a cheap excuse for a Retcon. She isn't just returning from the dead after Perfect Storm teleports away or something nor is she really Bodysurfing so it's really nothing like Dark Souls but just people that need therapy after being Mindraped, it's basically a cheap knockoff of SCP-963, it's not creating new Taylors it's just making new people think they're the old dead Taylor, there's absolutely no attachment there and any new Taylor just becomes a random Mook #∞ that just happens to have Perfect Storm. Clones with previous brain templates also count under Bodysurfing though but I highly doubt TSAB would care about a random mage on a backwater dimension and Cauldron would at this point just go "TO WAR WITH THE PEOPLE WE CAN'T TOUCH! THEY STOLE OUR STUFF!" even if cloning Taylor did work (which is highly unlikely).

Oh, it changed... It still seems she died though since a sword through the chest, unless there's healing magic involved, isn't particularly survivable in the long term and that's not even counting what up to this point their "subtle agents" would be doing everything completely against their training at this point, maybe it's secretly Cauldron trying to keep their mage since this fits more in line with a Cauldron action or a Alexandria Plot (even if that raises more questions...).
 
Last edited:
I'm excited for the interlude explaining what exactly their plan was
Indeed.
Al-hazredian Jewel Seeds? Sealed, not destroyed.
Book of Darkness and Wolkenritter? Reprogrammed and recruited respectfully.
The Saint's Cradle? Evacuated, then destroyed.
Mariage? The controller allowed to slumber and make a mentally-controlled duplicate.

This massive departure from what we see of the TSAB does require explanation.
tell the person they're attacking to stand down
And not in the local dialect to boot.
 
A not!Taylor, unless it's their brain being completely rewritten to be Taylor, wouldn't feel like Taylor and would just basically be a midstory Retcon. Even then it would just feel like a cheap excuse for a Retcon. She isn't just returning from the dead after Perfect Storm teleports away or something nor is she really Bodysurfing so it's really nothing like Dark Souls but just people that need therapy after being Mindraped, it's basically a cheap knockoff of SCP-963, it's not creating new Taylors it's just making new people think they're the old dead Taylor, there's absolutely no attachment there and any new Taylor just becomes a random Mook #∞ that just happens to have Perfect Storm.
Don't make assumptions about mechanics you haven't seen.
Indeed.
Al-hazredian Jewel Seeds? Sealed, not destroyed.
Book of Darkness and Wolkenritter? Reprogrammed and recruited respectfully.
The Saint's Cradle? Evacuated, then destroyed.
Mariage? The controller allowed to slumber and make a mentally-controlled duplicate.
This:
The Mariage themselves? All killed.

But look, here's the interlude.
 
This is what the first interlude would have been had Taylor died.

Non-Canon Interlude


"We're getting feedback now, but the interference is still there."

"Increase power and adjust base frequency. We are too close to contact to let this slip through our fingers."

Teana watched the Sojourner's crew work on the radio with a frown. A nudge to her arm made her glance over at Erga, who unlike her looked like the very definition of relaxed. "Ease up, Lanster. If scowling was gonna get this working again, we woulda been talking to Command weeks ago."

"That's the problem. Weeks ago. The Lost Logia has been loose on that world for months now, and we have solid proof that it has reactivated." She turned away only for scenes of fire and death to fill her mind's eye. "You didn't see it last time," she said in a softer voice. "This thing, the army it builds. It doesn't care about honor or mercy or peace. All it wants is to kill. Those that don't die immediately it rips apart to make more soldiers.

"I spent six months aboard the Targe. I knew all its men. I watched them be cut down and transformed. Three hundred good men, and in the thirty hours it took to find the Lost Logia and seal it, we lost 110. A third of the crew, just gone in less than two days." A sound distracted her and broke her out of the memories. Erga shifted, as though he was considering putting a hand on her shoulder or some other comforting gesture, and her cheeks burned with embarrassment. There was a time to come to terms with the guilt, but that was when the mission was over and she was back on Midchilda, not a moment before. "Add in the crews of the other ships, and we're talking about over five hundred people who lost their lives to this thing the last time some idiot turned it on. You'll have to forgive me if I'm not looking forward to a repeat of that, and after that fight, it seems like that's where we are headed."

"Eos will love that, I'm sure."

Teana winced at that drawling rebuke. The Warrant Officer was not taking his killing of the bombardment-type puppet well. That was not a great surprise; marines were trained for combat, but the majority went their entire careers without having to kill anyone. Using lethal force during a mission was followed with mandatory therapy sessions, and having just gone through them herself, she knew Eos would benefit from them no matter how uncomfortable they were.

Unfortunately, she doubted he would be the only marine on this ship who would be visiting a psychologist by the time this mission was done with.

"Contact confirmed!" cheered the communications officer.

Captain Aska nodded. "Strong work, Ensign. Commander, Lieutenant Commander, the comms are yours."

"Thanks, Cap." Shrugging his shoulders, Erga waved at the screen that appeared in front of them and said, "Enforcer Command, this is Commander Arton Erga, ID number 558F4. I need to speak with Admiral Tucson immediately."

The officer on the screen smiled back. "Good to see you're still in one piece, Erga. Give me a moment to patch you through."

The Enforcer insignia appeared, but soon enough it was replaced by the relieved face of the Enforcers' highest officer. "Erga, Lanster. Took you long enough. We were all starting to get worried around here."

"Ah, you do love me."

"You know what? Considering the circumstances, I'm actually going to let that one go," Admiral Tucson sighed. "Report."

She and Erga exchanged glances for a moment before she took a step forwards. The admiral might be relieved enough to ignore Erga's lip this time, but she was in no mood to see if that would last through catching him up on everything that had happened. "Three and a half weeks ago, the day after our last contact, we encountered what I can only describe as a controlled dimensional dislocation."

Tucson's eyes widened, and for good reason. Dimensional dislocations were rifts in the Dimensional Sea, bottomless holes that led to annihilation within Imaginary Space. Small dislocations would ravage cities, and the largest had erased the primordial civilization of Al-Hazard from existence. Even worlds not experiencing the event could be thrown into chaos from the immense gravitational waves dislocations threw out. "I take it you avoided it at the last moment?"

"No, sir. We didn't even know it was there until we had already flown straight through it. I've never seen anything like it, sir. Paper-thin, almost as it were an artificial barrier to keep something out." And wasn't that a terrifying thought? She had no clue how much power was needed and how advanced the technology would have to be to turn a multiversal disaster into a privacy screen, but she would be perfectly happy never finding out the answer. "We were moving fast enough that we weren't torn apart by the gravity shear, but it still damaged the engines to the point we could not remain in Dimensional Space. We crash-landed on the nearest planet."

"So much for discretion," he muttered, "but at least now we know what brought down the Agharti. If it had already fought off pirates, it could have been in bad enough shape that it did not handle the dislocation as well as you did and was torn apart. How many people know about your presence?"

"None."

Tucson brought his head up to stare at her. "None? Our local contact made it sound like her world had a substantial population."

"It probably does. We did not land on her exact world, though. Earth Bet is a cluster world. Our astrometry counts fifteen dimensions within extremely close proximity, plus another two or three that we can't conclusively identify."

"A cluster world of fifteen to eighteen," he repeated. "That rivals the Haranyl cluster, the largest cluster world we have ever located."

Teana nodded. "It was a surprise to us, too. We've been exploring the worlds as quickly as we can, but with the Sojourner grounded we have been limited to personal transfers, and Lieutenant Sambar can only transport a few people at a time even with the short distance we have to travel. It has taken longer than we like to search each world. Thankfully they are all low-magic worlds, so we have focused on scanning for mana use to speed up the process."

"Any success?"

"You could say that," Erga interjected lazily.

She shot him a glare, and he grinned before pantomiming locking his mouth closed. Turning back to the admiral, she explained, "We were exploring Earth Bet-12 when we noticed active magic use and went over to obtain more information. It was one of the Assimilation Engine's bombardment-types."

"You are sure about this?" She nodded, and he closed his eyes with a groan. When he opened them again, it was the most experienced Enforcer still active who stared back at her. "Casualties?"

"None on our side, sir." He waved for her to continue with her report. "The mage noticed our approach but was not on high alert on arrival. An attempt was made to ambush and capture her for questioning, but she defended herself and so we deployed a barrier as per procedure. Before the barrier had stabilized she was able to call in a familiar. None of them had familiars last time," Teana added with a frown, "but that was probably due to a lack of animals to convert. If all four types the Logia can deploy are capable of creating familiars, that doubles the rate at which it can build its forces. Regardless, we engaged the pair. And order to stand down was ignored, which is not a surprise as none of the others did, either, though at least she did not immediately tell us how we would be converted into forces for Galea. Lethal force was authorized once the mage cast her type's Buster-class bombardment spell at the building where Sambar and I were located and demolished it. We barely managed to escape the blast, and thankfully we also avoided being lethally irradiated; that might have been because the spell was fired at a building in open air rather than within ship corridors, but I can't say for sure. Captain Erga was able to clip her with his Buster, though with less than expected results, so I locked her down with a bind and fired Starlight Breaker. The familiar went on a rampage at that time, but Warrant Officer Eos was able to recover and land the killing blow to the mage before the familiar could inflict substantial injuries."

"I will make sure he's scheduled for therapy on your return. Did you recover the body and the Device?"

"Body, yes. It's in storage for burial, either here or at sea. Device?" She shook her head. "It autocast her Buster spell and broke the barrier, then it flew off under its own power too fast for us to track it. I don't know how or why it did that. None of the bombardiers' Devices did that last time. With the barrier gone, we transferred out with the body before any more converted mages could find us."

"Or the Rare Skill users," added Erga, breaking his promise to keep quiet.

"Rare Skill users," Tucson echoed before pulling a document up on another screen. "Yes, I remember Taylor saying something about people with unique skills on her world. 'Parahumans', that's right."

"We aren't sure how to approach that problem," she admitted. "We watched a few fight in secret, and none of their abilities triggered the mana sensors. I just don't know how they can have Rare Skills without utilizing mana, nor how there can be that many unrelated Skills coming from one planet."

"That matches what information the Infinity Library could track down about them. It's only been documented once, in Middle Belkan times soon after the start of the Saint King Unification War. For a couple of generations adolescents started showing signs of Rare Skills that were unrelated to the Belkan casting style, but they all lost their abilities once the person in question began their combat training, and then the appearance of those skills petered out. They were found on Haranyl, too, if I remember right," he ended thoughtfully.

Was there something about large cluster worlds that was involved in the development of these nonmagical Rare Skills? Something to leave to the theoretical magicists, she decided. "How do you wish us to proceed now that we know for sure that the Assimilation Engine is active again?"

"Make contact with Taylor and Dragon first. They are our only local contacts, and they should be able to help find the Lost Logia without rousing suspicion. They know this world and these parahumans. I'll forward the identification code for the Agharti's radio; that is currently our only means of contacting them. Just so you are aware, they have had difficulties with their power situation, so I don't know how long it will take you to track them down."

"It's better than nothing. We'll find them."

"See that you do, Lanster. More importantly, find them before the Lost Logia does."
 
Last edited:
I've stated that I'm changing the plan from Taylor dying and being reborn to her not dying at all. That's about as clear as I can possibly get.
Thank you.
This relieves me greatly.
I am a new-
This is what the first interlude would have been had Taylor died.
MAXIMUM NINJA'D
Okay...
Well that just happened.
Anyway, like I said, I'm new here and didn't get a chance to add my two cents to the vote, so I'm glad this isn't the end of Taylor. And that interlude, while it would have lead to some very interesting storylines, is not how I would want to see the story continue.
So, since Taylor will survive, I am looking forward to the hilariously awkward conversations that will undoubtably ensue.
"You attacked me first."
"You responded with unnecessary force."
"I repeat; You. Attacked. First. And I've have just had the worst possible day BEFORE you tried to blow me out of the sky. I am not going to take any of the flack for this. I have had it UP TO HERE WITH THIS NONSENSE."
 
Ok, if you as the QM are saying they all died. That's different.
And order to stand down was ignored,
So the whole 'different language'
thing is just brushed over due to what I'm going to politely call 'assumptions'.
Lethal force was authorized once the mage cast her type's Buster-class bombardment spell at the building where Sambar and I were located and demolished it. We barely managed to escape the blast, and thankfully we also avoided being lethally irradiated
Here's the big dealie-o.
1. One of the things you said when the vote was tallied was 'the only way it could be worse was if you chose to go lethal'. By this statement, it would have made no difference.
2. The entire team is apparently incapable to telling a lethal from a non-lethal attack. You've already had it ruled that non-lethal blasts still blow buildings up. But that nobody thought to check for radiation. Not when the first barrage of Shooters hit. Not after one of their own got plowed through a field of Shooters. Not when the Solar Wrath was deployed so close to them.
"Make contact with Taylor and Dragon first. They are our only local contacts
... rather than lay low and seek out the local contact during their month and change of being on-planet, they decide to research the planet and then go after a mage.

@Silently Watches, the whole thing of a clearly ptsd-stricken mage running after a target and not thinking clearly is a good but of character development and conflict, that's good. But an entire team of mages making all of the mistakes here? It's nonsensical. The entire team shows itself to be unprepared for interact with the locals, and the lot of them are incapable of doing basic analysis in the middle of battle. Something essential for the math-heavy mage combat. Maybe Lanster would be too vengeance-focused to do that. But the entire team, when it's clear they are supposed to have their heads in the game? I am seeing no establishment.

Now that you've shown your hand I will repeat myself, with a modification: It's hard to see how you fully thought the characterization and gameplay through in making this turn of events.
 
Last edited:
:wtf:so her dying would result in Lacy/Epoch/Shipwright becoming not!Taylor? Hope the body would modified to look like the last version of her or that would just be suicide inducing levels of horror for her combined with body dysmorphia and it sounds like it tried doing that back when it was doing the enslaving thing.

What about the different language? If that was a slave then it's pointless to tell her to stand down but if it's not then no one knows what you're saying and they wouldn't stand down even if it wasn't in the middle of not dying.
 
Last edited:
That was not a great surprise; marines were trained for combat, but the majority went their entire careers without having to kill anyone.
Just as I expected.
They're primarily policemen, not soldiers. They made token effort to make an arrest even knowing too well that it won't work.

We barely managed to escape the blast, and thankfully we also avoided being lethally irradiated; that might have been because the spell was fired at a building in open air rather than within ship corridors, but I can't say for sure.
:mad:Should have voted for lethal...

It's only been documented once, in Middle Belkan times soon after the start of the Saint King Unification War. For a couple of generations adolescents started showing signs of Rare Skills that were unrelated to the Belkan casting style, but they all lost their abilities once the person in question began their combat training, and then the appearance of those skills petered out.
Ah, poor Shards. That damned Belkans foiled all their nice experiments with these damned Devices. :lol

"Make contact with Taylor and Dragon first. They are our only local contacts, and they should be able to help find the Lost Logia without rousing suspicion.
That could have been a nice test for Dragon.
Will she still be eager to join them, after they killed her friend without any warning or remorse?
 
"Make contact with Taylor and Dragon first.

Well, it was nice that there was change of plans from you. That level of incompetence the TSAB moron is showing would have been quest destroying level. TSAB agents have skills to capture person with spells, specially after tiring them out first. Most people vote battle because TSAB don't do kill route from start and other opponents would have been defeatable.

Even after combat reactions to TSAB would have been hostile with most of players regardless of ending, if not going to antagonist in eyes of lot of people.

Death - Fuck these murderers, let's help Alexandria to screw them over
Wounded & Captured - That idiot has to get punishment or screw you
Captured - You would let that idiot still be part of your organization and me to work with him? Screw you.
 
I'm not abandoning the quest just yet, because the author retconned Taylor death. But I think that nonexistent knowledge of Nanoha mean that I don't understand at least half of what's happening. I would have prefer if it's just an alt power thing instead of a real crossover. I'll wait for the next chapter before deciding.
 
Normally looking back it's easy to tell what the 'good' vote option was, this time I can't see it, not really. I think that's what bothered me about the orginal version.

Plus even if Taylor could come back from death, Sam would still be gone, forever as far as we know. So that's still killing off a major character.
 
Another thing I would like to point out is that, although you said bombardment was the worst choice, it was also the most in-character thing for Taylor to do. Especially considering her bad day so far. Not trying to sound harsh here, but it feels like you're punishing Taylor for what would be a completely understandable and natural reaction. Plus I kind of agree with Always Late on some of their logic points about the TSAB team's actions. (Though I do feel they're a bit too aggressive in their vehemence)
That said, I'm still looking forward to whatever comes next.
 
Back
Top