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A Sword Without a Hilt: A Song of Ice and Fire/D&D 3.5 Crossover

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DragonParadox said:
The Damsel and the Dream ​

Thirtieth Day of the Fourth Month 294 AC

Patrek Mallister had lived the last two weeks in hell, one all the more dreadful for being furnished with the accommodations of his familiar life. He said good morning to his lady mother each day, and he rode down to Seaguard Town on Smith's Day to see what his folk had been doing and to be seen doing the rounds. He sparred in the yard, and after noon read through the ledgers in the evening... and it was all of it a lie. The words that came out of his mouth were not of his devising, and the path his feet were set upon were not of his will. He was a puppet dancing on threads of silver and lies. As though in a dream, he could see where he was meant to exit the stage.

Father above, they are going to sacrifice us all and not even blink at it.

Although the young lord had hoped and prayed with all his heart that at least the strange envoys from the Rock would have the sense to guard their own lives and thus the lives of his folk in the bargain, that grew fainter with every moment since the sky ships had come. The bastards could probably just dig into the earth and be gone quick as snapping your fingers.

Why the fuck had he taken the damn armor? Did he hope it would save him from sharing his father's senseless death? Did he hope it would make him the warrior lord he had never been instead of the fraud he felt like?

The answers felt so distant now, like a song heard from the bottom of a well. He could just sleep, just let the strains of silver music take him, and it would not hurt anymore.

Then she appeared... literally out of thin air, she appeared by what could only be magic, a woman with hair of spun silver and eyes of amethyst. She was not alone, of course. There was a man with her as well, one who bore a bravo's sword and a smile twice as sharp, but Patrek had eyes only for her. He was quite proud of the fact that when the crushing silver mind was cut from him, he managed to ask, "Who are you people?" and not just ask the woman her name.

She gave it anyway. "I am Siduri of Sorcerer's Deep, he is Osyrx of the Shadows, and we are here to rescue you, my lord."

Part of Patrek bristled at the word 'rescue', for all it was accurate, and another part considered the fact that she had a beautiful name. Alas, most of his attention was concerned with not collapsing after he had been abruptly been given command of his own body once more. "The armor is..."

"Sentient and malicious," the man introduced as 'of the Shadows', whatever the hell that meant, broke in dryly. "Does it have a name?"

"It was just armor," Patrek half-gasped, half-shouted as he kicked the piece of slowly mending silver on the floor. "I ordered armor from a trader with connections to the east. I never believed the stories in the parchments, but this..."

"The merchant was not from the east at all, but in the pay of the Lannisters. The armor was cursed to make you their creature," Siduri interjected gently. "Hurry now, you must stand down the garrison lest Tywin Lannister's will be done and your people are sacrificed at his whim."

Patrek hurried.

***​

By the time the sky ships had raced overhead in the direction of Pinkmaiden, Lord Patrek Mallister was sitting in his solar with his two rescuers, his wary Maester, and his relieved mother, trying to piece together just how his will had been so thoroughly subverted and what the thing wanted from him besides being Tywin's lapdog. Alas, the answers were rather thin on the ground.

"The marks on the armor are Celestial," Lady Siduri started, after looking over the thing a long moment.

"From the heavens, you mean?" Maester Rickard asked. "They are not of any constellation I know of."

"No, I mean there are some answers you probably do not want," she replied, getting up. "We cannot linger long as we are part of the reserve, fine as the tea is and fair the company." She curtsied to Patrek's mother, who for some reason he could not fathom looked suspicious. House Mallister owed her a debt almost impossible to pay.

"I'll come with you to help p..." Patrek barely managed to cut himself off in time. "I wish to accompany you in your task to help in the Dragon's cause."

"First you must swear the oaths. Then I am certain he will assign you a task worthy of your your station and skills," she replied with a charming smile.

Patrek was certain she would, too.

OOC: Whoever called infatuation first have an internet cookie.
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Made some additional edits to the chapter, DP.
 
Haha, Siduri could end up with a nice Westerosi boytoy wrapped around her gold-capped horns for when she wants to slum with the barbarians.
 
It is the Devil's temptation after all...in any case this is another family who has kindly decided to surrender. At this rate most of the blood will be Lannister in nature.

Edit: Also Siduri is everything a pious Lord of Seaguard, protector of the Riverlands from raiders, should be against. Siduri is a pirate, a mage and has a devilish nature to her. Talk about teenage rebellion.
 
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Called it on the armor being celestial.

Also, Osryx needs lessons in how to be a proper wingman. He should have shamelessly flirted with the widowed Lady Mallister to distract her.
 
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Lady Mallister: "I forbid you from seeing that she-devil harlot! She wants to sink her dirty, baseborn claws into Seaguard. I won't have you squandering your father's legacy so shamefully, certainly not for a fair-faced witch!"

Patrek: "You don't know of what you speak, mother. Lady Siduri is a gentle maiden. Her beauty is but an ember next to the roaring bonfire of her soul!"

Lady Mallister: "It's a roaring bonfire because she's from Hell!"

Patrek: "You're just scared she'll take your place as the lady of Seaguard."

Lady Mallister: "How dare you-"

Meanwhile in Sorcerer's Deep, gathered around a Scrying Mirror:

Azema: "You sure you don't have some Succubus somewhere in your lineage?"

Siduri: "Oh, please, like I-"

Tyene: "Shhh, I think Patrek is about to start reciting poetry about you."
 
I often wonder why the "writing bad love poetry" is such a commonly referenced trope when it barely occurs in actual media and I have never seen or heard of someone who actually did it in real life.
 
Azel said:
I see. Well, I guess I should not have asked a question into the Abyss without preparing myself to receive some cursed knowledge.
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I just refer you back to my previous answer to this very subject:

Crake said:
I honestly can't fathom anything I'd have to be ashamed of.

Not only am I the most upstanding individual in this board, I might be the most admirable person in existence. Why wouldn't you want to emulate my success? Genuinely baffled here.
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Goldfish said:
Lady Mallister: "I forbid you from seeing that she-devil harlot! She wants to sink her dirty, baseborn claws into Seaguard. I won't have you squandering your father's legacy so shamefully, certainly not for a fair-faced witch!"

Patrek: "You don't know of what you speak, mother. Lady Siduri is a gentle maiden. Her beauty is but an ember next to the roaring bonfire of her soul!"

Lady Mallister: "It's a roaring bonfire because she's from Hell!"

Patrek: "You're just scared she'll take your place as the lady of Seaguard."

Lady Mallister: "How dare you-"

Meanwhile in Sorcerer's Deep, gathered around a Scrying Mirror:

Azema: "You sure you don't have some Succubus somewhere in your lineage?"

Siduri: "Oh, please, like I-"

Tyene: "Shhh, I think Patrek is about to start reciting poetry about you."
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I'm imagining some secret lady club where they get together to talk about boys ans girly stuff they can't talk in public. It also includes Mereth(who pretends to be doing anything other than gossiping, even while they invite her to specifically do that), Glyra (who is not invited but somehow always bumps into the group) and one or two of the arcanums.
 
Tomcost said:
I'm imagining some secret lady club where they get together to talk about boys ans girly stuff they can't talk in public. It also includes Mereth(who pretends to be doing anything other than gossiping, even while they invite her to specifically do that), Glyra (who is not invited but somehow always bumps into the group) and one or two of the arcanums.
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I want to say Tyene is above petty gossip... and she is... about 99% of the population.

But she totally has a gossip group with "the gals", and the rumor mill they churn is not short of targets and colorful characters given the kind of people Viserys has in his inner court.
 
masterofmadness said:
I entirely forgot how much fun Siduri is! We really need to see more of her. Is it wrong I want her flirting to be too effective and have her need to deal with the attentions of a 'Lord Piss Poor'.
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DragonParadox said:
OOC: Whoever called infatuation first have an internet cookie.
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HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Oh my god this is perfect! Mallister I can't fault your taste but god!
DragonParadox said:
Then she appeared... literally out of thin air she appeared by what could only be magic, a woman with hair of spun silver and eyes of amethyst. She was not alone of course, there was a man with her as well who bore a bravo's sword and a smile twice as sharp, but Patrek had eyes only for her. He was quite proud of the fact that when the crushing silver mind was cut from him he managed to ask: "Who are you people?" and not just ask the woman her name.
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Oh it is even Love at first sight! What a story! "The moment I laid eyes on her my heart was her's though my body was in the grasp of that terrible cursed armor which enslaved me"
DragonParadox said:
Part of Patrek bristled at the word 'rescue', for all it was accurate, and another part considered the fact that she had a beautiful name.
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There there Partrek nothing wrong with being recued by a beautiful women! Also she had a beautiful name? I get the impression you would have found Steve a beautiful name if she had it.
DragonParadox said:
"No, I mean there are some answers you probably do not want," she replied, getting up. "We cannot linger long as we are part of the reserve, fine as the tea is and fair the company." She curtsied to Patrek's mother who for some reason he could not fathom looked suspicious. House Mallister owed her a debt almost impossible to pay.
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Oh and his mom doesn't like her too! Just when I thought it couldn't get any better! Maybe now she won't reject you immediately just to spit her!
DragonParadox said:
"First you must swear the oaths, then I am certain he will assign you a task worthy of your station and skills," she replied with a charming smile.

Patrek was certain she would, too.
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Siduri: *Scoff* How about licking the dirt from my feet Lord Piss Poor.
Patrek: Yes Mi'lady!
Siduri: Shit!
Tomcost said:
I'm imagining some secret lady club where they get together to talk about boys ans girly stuff they can't talk in public. It also includes Mereth(who pretends to be doing anything other than gossiping, even while they invite her to specifically do that), Glyra (who is not invited but somehow always bumps into the group) and one or two of the arcanums.
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Crake said:
I want to say Tyene is above petty gossip... and she is... about 99% of the population.

But she totally has a gossip group with "the gals", and the rumor mill they churn is not short of targets and colorful characters given the kind of people Viserys has in his inner court.
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ryuan said:
Tyene gossip group is so exclusive you need at least mind blank to participate.
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Crake said:
Not as uncommon as it used to be.
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Meanwhile Patrek and Edmure are forming a club of men chasing women way out of their league they occasional look on for entertainment.

Hermetia: I konw it is frustrating but men falling head over heal for you is just part of the price that come from being so incredibly beautiful and rich... or frankly just rich since one makes the other.
Siduri: Sigh... being rich backfired on me. I though I would never see the day... still good to be rich though
Hermetia: Oh yes definitely.

Also this many powerful people and spell casters meeting regularly under mind blank scare the Inquisition shitless but Blood raven and Garin and too smart to try and stop it.
 
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I've been thinking about specialized anti IAF weapons, and there are actually some decent options if you've got a rough idea of what to prepare for and a healthy research budget.

I think we've previously discussed using Gravity Sphere to maroon one mid air, and its a good enough tactic that its worth mentioning again.

The shields make projectiles tricky, but AoEs could do some damage, supposing they are will to spend some money. The various ships include a number of non-metal structural components, so a brace of Transmute Metal to Wood bolts would wreak all kinds of havoc on one pulling high speed maneuvers.

Mana Flux would also probably do some nasty things to all sorts of systems, especially if some retuning was done to make them more unfriendly to a wider variety of enchantments.

Resonating Bolt would make for an interesting weapon as well. The ability to keep moving as long as it destroys the barrier that stopped it would make for a good weapon against armored targets like a moonchaser. The major issue would be range and damage, but if someone is researching custom weapons they might be able to solve one of those problems.
 
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