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A Sword Without a Hilt: A Song of Ice and Fire/D&D 3.5 Crossover

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Algalon said:
Just be a nice uncle, and leave. Maybe give her some of our Festival figurines as a consolidation gift, or a bar of chocolate (I'd guess Dany would carry one around as a snack, seeing as it's her favorite sweet).
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You know...

lockingbane said:
Do we have any in our cloak @DragonParadox?
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Yeah, I'd like an answer to this too. I really want to go maximum troll here, and some chocolate is just enough to get questions asked of her which will lead to the hilarious explanation.
 
Artemis1992 said:
How?
I mean the second part.
We can't turn people into warlocks and I doubt we want to negotiate with Demonlords or Feyqueen on her behalf.
Maybe with Bael, but even that would be insanely pricy for making her a Warlock.
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Maelor is a Warlock, seemingly without a Patron. Surely he could teach her? Or we could figure out who his patron is and make it happen ourselves.

Snowfire said:
We cannot keep her out of Scrying range forever, and she will want to go home. This is a really terrible idea.
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1. Yes we can. Just keep her in the Shadow Tower all day with a minder.
2. The point of kidnapping hostages isn't always to help them out. There's also valid strategic reasons (like implicating Varys + the Faith/Devils and making things harder for Cersei and Robert). The poor kid will have a sad year. Whatever.
OR we could go full mindrape and make her forget her parents. Or put her in temporal stasis for the year or something.

Duesal said:
Oh, thank god. Voices of reason.

No kidnapping Mycella. That's how you start the war with Westeros right this second and we don't have time for that crap.

This is a terrible idea on every level.
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Killjoy. You said that when I started brainstorming ways to conquer Lys after we grew the Fungus Forge Tree!
:D
:p

Snowfire said:
This idea. I like it.

[X] Plan Just a Dutiful Servant
-[X] After ensuring that your appearance will not appear magical, and having Varys check for any hiding guards, greet the Princess under the veil of a courtier come to collect their master's pet.
-[X] Tell her that the cat's name is Balerion, and that you've come to take him back to his owner.
--[X] Make a joke about how cats often are less owned and more owners themselves.
-[X] If it appears reasonable, there is no one else watching, and you are certain that no magic will be triggered by it, remove the dust and spiderwebs from her clothing with a small working, seemingly bound to one of your rings.
-[X] 'Accidentally' acquire part of a hair in the process - people don't notice a few strands breaking as long as you don't pull them.

And then she'll tell her mother about the nice man who came to take Balerion back to his owner, and who cleaned up her dress with a wave of his hand!

Paranoia thy name is Cersei.
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Amazingly, this awesome plan has a flaw: she may think that she's Balerion's owner, if it's been around the castle for ages and she knows it.
Still, I'm cure our amazing social skills can outmaneuver a toddler.

[X] Snowfire

This is definitely not a fun plan, but it makes sense. I would straight-up give her a minor magic item (PfE?) or something. Make things ever clearer, and make sure that Cersei will listen to the kid/use magic to investigate (Lanna can look into the past like we do).
 
Snowfire said:
You know...



Yeah, I'd like an answer to this too. I really want to go maximum troll here, and some chocolate is just enough to get questions asked of her which will lead to the hilarious explanation.
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I must insist that we do not glamour ourselves. I want Myrcella to go around telling everybody of her nice Uncle Viserys, with his pretty white hair, and beautiful purple eyes, who gave her nice toys and sweets.
 
TalonofAnathrax said:
OR we could go full mindrape and make her forget her parents. Or put her in temporal stasis for the year or something.
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Hahahaha-

Go to hell.

Algalon said:
I must insist that we do not glamour ourselves. I want Myrcella to go around telling everybody of her nice Uncle Viserys, with his pretty white hair, and beautiful purple eyes, who gave her nice toys and sweets.
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Hmm. The main reason I want a glamour is in case of hiding eyes, but...

@DragonParadox I'm guessing it's highly unlikely for her to recognise us given her age, right?

lockingbane said:
@Snowfire we have chocolate!!! Time to make the queen TRULY paranoid!!
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On it.
 
Hey @Snowfire care to update the plan? Give her a complete set of festival figurines and some chocolate?

I also would prefer if we dont glamour ourselves but that is just me wanting the queen to go into maximum paranoia

EDIT: Apparently you are already on it.
 
The festival figurines are more than enough to give Cersei the biggest of heart attacks. Especially considering how far the tourney is. She will be seeing Viserys everywhere.
 
Wait, I got an even better idea. If she introduces herselve as princess, then we can introduce ourselves as the Silver Prince - Rhaeghar's title.

Watch as Robert get's a heart attack.
 
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@Snowfire I wasn't serious about the mind control.
Temporal Stasis would be a perfect solution (no consequences for her, really) but it would cost us actual money. :/

On the other hand, @Algalon is a genius and you should be following his ideas!
 
If we take her we lose the support of any remaining Targaryen loyalists. We lose Stannis, and the Starks. We would be demonstrating ourselves as being tainted with the same genetic madness as Rhaegar and Aerys. We lose all legitimacy and set ourselves up for a troublesome reign.
 
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I would suggest a temporary memory modification so that way we can do our business and leave without a 3 year old telling mommy just yet. I want her to have a heart attack but not without putting every guard on alert before the Spider hunt ends.
 
Arimai said:
If we take here we lose the support of any remaining Targaryen loyalists. We lose Stannis, and the Starks. We would be demonstrating ourselves as being tainted with the same genetic madness as Rhaegar and Aerys. We lose all legitimacy and set ourselves up for a troublesome reign.
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I assume you mean "take her" because otherwise it sounds as if we plan to take the red keep here and now
 
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