Ship of Fools: A Taylor Varga Omake (Complete)

Pretty certain the Asgard and Lantean transporter technology was related to/the same as the ring technology, just a bit more refined and not requiring a base station at each end. It was a matter/energy stream that visibly moved through real space between two points and could be intercepted.
 
Only if you have the exact odds of how improbable such a drive is, a finite improbability drive (commonly used to make everyone's underwear in a party jump to someone else in said party), and a really strong cup of tea. And I'm sure Leet's shard has no idea how to build a finite improbability drive. Or even what improbability is. After all, if the shard was capable of manipulating an improbability's chance of occurring, the Entities would be capable of such an event. And if that was possible, it is a near certainty they would have used it already to achieve their goal of infinite food and infinite living space.
Nah, Leet can build it. Entities are capable of it, they just don't have imagination to consider it. Which is why they do what they do in the first place.
 
Only if you have the exact odds of how improbable such a drive is, a finite improbability drive (commonly used to make everyone's underwear in a party jump to someone else in said party), and a really strong cup of tea. And I'm sure Leet's shard has no idea how to build a finite improbability drive. Or even what improbability is. After all, if the shard was capable of manipulating an improbability's chance of occurring, the Entities would be capable of such an event. And if that was possible, it is a near certainty they would have used it already to achieve their goal of infinite food and infinite living space.
You're giving the Entities far too much credit for intelligence and imagination.

Also, probability manipulation can be plenty powerful without involving infinities. See "P-math" and the Jokers from Terry Pratchett's The Dark Side Of The Sun.
 
OK, so I was wrong about the Asgard teleporter. It's the same type of thing as Trek: rip your bits to bits, then send them off with reassembly instructions and hope the receiving station isn't having a dramatic plot moment.

By the way, does anybody who watches Discovery know how the spore drive works? It somehow involves mushrooms? Did they manage to weaponize Super Mario in the Star Trek universe? I've been explicitly avoiding STD references in the fic (and isn't that an unfortunate abbreviation?).
 
Dealing with the Ascended will be very interesting. I don't know how they stack up against Taylor and Leet's tech, but I would personally classify them as 'Lowly Pissants'.
 
Dealing with the Ascended will be very interesting. I don't know how they stack up against Taylor and Leet's tech, but I would personally classify them as 'Lowly Pissants'.

Well, there was the SG-1 omake Quiet on Set! where this sort of thing came up...

Looking around, she added, "This was just a personal project, though, I had some spare time. Weird universe, this one. Energy beings all over the place, and some of them are really rude. Couple of galaxies over there were a whole bunch of them who were extremely unpleasant, we had to come to an arrangement."

"An arrangement?" Cam had a sudden clenching sensation in his gut. He could see out of the corner of his eye that Teal'c seemed to be looking very thoughtful.

"Yep. We arranged that they'd stop being unpleasant. Seems to have stuck." She seemed pleased. "The ones around here are much less annoying, they keep to themselves for the most part. It's a bit weird, this constant wanting to become immaterial energy some species have. The real world is so much more interesting. I mean, just look at that view!"


The Ancients aren't that much of a problem, when you come down to it :)
 
It's less them as they are now, it's their toys they left lying around.
You call them toys, I call them Doomsday Devices. Seriously, almost everything that they left behind can be used to at least wipe out a sizeable city and at worst wipe out all life in the galaxy. The last one, if I remeber correctly, is a terraformer that can terraform any planet in the milky way with a stargate on it, but it can do the opposite too.
And these idiots left it completely intact and operational, so any douchbag can use it as a final "FUCK YOU" when they are on the verge of defeat.
 
Well, there was the SG-1 omake Quiet on Set! where this sort of thing came up...

Looking around, she added, "This was just a personal project, though, I had some spare time. Weird universe, this one. Energy beings all over the place, and some of them are really rude. Couple of galaxies over there were a whole bunch of them who were extremely unpleasant, we had to come to an arrangement."

"An arrangement?" Cam had a sudden clenching sensation in his gut. He could see out of the corner of his eye that Teal'c seemed to be looking very thoughtful.

"Yep. We arranged that they'd stop being unpleasant. Seems to have stuck." She seemed pleased. "The ones around here are much less annoying, they keep to themselves for the most part. It's a bit weird, this constant wanting to become immaterial energy some species have. The real world is so much more interesting. I mean, just look at that view!"


The Ancients aren't that much of a problem, when you come down to it :)

I had a follow up to this:

Taylor Varga (Worm/Luna Varga) - Crossover | Page 517

Edit: Link was seriously fouled up.
 
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You call them toys, I call them Doomsday Devices. Seriously, almost everything that they left behind can be used to at least wipe out a sizeable city and at worst wipe out all life in the galaxy. The last one, if I remeber correctly, is a terraformer that can terraform any planet in the milky way with a stargate on it, but it can do the opposite too.
And these idiots left it completely intact and operational, so any douchbag can use it as a final "FUCK YOU" when they are on the verge of defeat.

Or there's the similar device that caused a chunk of the galaxy to get caught in a day-long time-loop for months. Then there's the machine that created EXPLODING TUMORS in Atlantis. There was also the energy extraction experiment that Rodney used to accidentally blow up a solar system. Oh, and there was the device that destroyed Wraith hyperdrives when turned on...and also happened to make Stargates BLOW UP when used. Or Janus's time machine puddle jumper, which was just left lying around. How about the knowledge archives that would randomly grab anybody who walked by and shove so much data into their brains that they would die as even the autonomic functions were overwritten? Let's not forget that Ancients and Lanteans were responsible for both Anubis and the Wraith, respectively.
 
Or there's the similar device that caused a chunk of the galaxy to get caught in a day-long time-loop for months. Then there's the machine that created EXPLODING TUMORS in Atlantis. There was also the energy extraction experiment that Rodney used to accidentally blow up a solar system. Oh, and there was the device that destroyed Wraith hyperdrives when turned on...and also happened to make Stargates BLOW UP when used. Or Janus's time machine puddle jumper, which was just left lying around. How about the knowledge archives that would randomly grab anybody who walked by and shove so much data into their brains that they would die as even the autonomic functions were overwritten? Let's not forget that Ancients and Lanteans were responsible for both Anubis and the Wraith, respectively.
Sounds like just another Tuesday in Brockton Bay.
 
A point. The exploding tumors was stored near the engery squid mechine. 99% of the race considered them amusing but failed trash.
 
Oh, and only partly booting Anubis back to being mortal after deciding to Ascend him to begin with.
Well, technically that was them using Anubis to prove a point to Oma Desala about her(?) habit of Ascending those she judged worthy. She wasn't allowed to fully revoke his Ascencion bit tags after he showed his true colors.
 
There was also the energy extraction experiment that Rodney used to accidentally blow up a solar system.

As Rodney himself would point out, it was only 3/4ths of a solar system.

EDIT: It might have been 5/6ths, I really need to go back and rewatch that...
 
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Well, technically that was them using Anubis to prove a point to Oma Desala about her(?) habit of Ascending those she judged worthy. She wasn't allowed to fully revoke his Ascencion bit tags after he showed his true colors.

Oh yes, because "proving a point" by ascending then partly descending a dangerous megalomaniac so they are even MORE dangerous by making them unkillable is a great way to demonstrate that Olma has poor judgement.
 
Oh yes, because "proving a point" by ascending then partly descending a dangerous megalomaniac so they are even MORE dangerous by making them unkillable is a great way to demonstrate that Olma has poor judgement.
Granted. Their idea of how to prove a point almost invariably created more issues than the original problem did, especially if they were disciplining another Ascended.
 
Kind of all types of FTL travel. Wormholes, whether they be gate-based or free-standing drives, are just punching a shortcut through the universe. Other options, which I believe is how the Asgard teleporter worked, is to just fold space like a piece of paper so the two points are congruent, then shift the mass over. I'm not sure, but I think the revised BSG jump drives were supposed to work like that. Other options, like Star Trek teleporters, travel effectively at the speed of information, so you theoretically could use them to travel FTL if the transfer medium was sufficient. Note that supposedly Star Trek computers use warp fields on their computer cores to make processing FTL. Quantum communicators like in Mass Effect could also do the same, theoretically.

Mass Effect also used the eponymous effect to travel FTL in real space by lowering the mass of the vessel...somehow, via space magic. Trek warp drives just twist the space itself. Star Wars, Stargate, and probably a bunch of other universes use an alternate dimension where the rules of travel time vary. The old Traveler RPG had an interesting take on that, where travel time was consistent regardless of distance traveled. I think Halo's slipstream drive is sort of similar, but I'm not as familiar with that franchise. David Brin's Uplift series actually had multiple levels of hyperspace, and travel through some layers could have interesting memetic-related effects.

The final way of space travel in FTL that I can think of off the top of my head would be simply editing reality so that you are in a different place. Brin had a species called the Episiarch that was capable of this. You could argue that this is how Q gets around, as well, in Star Trek. I'm not sure if the TARDIS works this way, though it is pretty damned close. Note that if you have this level of control over reality, you're pretty close to god-like in power in the setting.

For this fic, Stargate and Alien universes use hyperspace, Star Trek uses warp, the superhero universes use multiple ways of getting around from a teleportation perspective, usually with inherent limitations. Leet can build anything once, so all of the above are theoretically within his grasp.

You've forgotten the slipstream drive from GR:Andromeda. It explicitly works at the speed of plot. Of course for some pilots plot moves faster than others. (Computers need not apply)

EDIT: To be honest, the bulk of the Anchients getting wiped out alongside the Ori at the end of Stargate SG1 served them right. They could have cleaned up the messes they left behind. Instead they stuck their collective heads in the sand, and punished members of their species that did want to clean up the mistakes (such as Anubis).
Someone wrote a fic where the Ancients were late-comers to the Ascended realm and those rules were already in place about non-interference.
 
Chapter 20: Deliberation and Fumigation
Chapter 20: Deliberation and Fumigation

The crew re-gathered after their break, some sporting snacks and beverages.

"All right," said Harry, "let's get back to the massive train wreck that is my reality. My biggest problems, in order of severity from least to most, is an attack on a friend of mine from Corpsetaker, the ghost of a necromancer I defeated, a reappearance of the Denarians, and most importantly, an assault on the supernatural prison I...watch, I guess is the best word, by Outsiders. That last one is probably the most dangerous to the world as a whole. Also, the Fomor have appeared to fill the vacuum left by the defeat of the Red Court vampires."

"What Harry isn't mentioning," said Peter, who along with Ellen had looked at Harry's story, "is that he has a Spirit of Intellect growing in his head that will kill him unless it's released, that his friends are also in danger from the Fomor, and that his daughter is at risk from the Denarians." One of the things Peter had learned in his career as a hero is that he, himself, counted as somebody worth protecting from the bad guys. Harry hadn't apparently learned that lesson. "Honestly, Harry, some of the mistakes in your past would have been easier if you learned to rely on other people and took better care of yourself."

"That has been pointed out to me before," said Harry wryly. "I blame childhood trauma." He said it flippantly, but there was a kernel of earnestness nonetheless.

"Is there a reason not to try and find a way to remove the Spirit from Harry before he goes back?" asked Ellen. Having an unwanted parasite living in your body hit a little too close to home for her.

Harry considered, before saying, "That would be fine as long as Bonea isn't hurt in the process. She's like another daughter to me, in a way."

"Bonea?" asked Ellen.

"That's what I named her. It's from an old word for beautiful," answered Dresden. It was also a wordplay on the word, "bones," given that such spirits tended to live in skulls, but that was just a secondary reason that suited Harry's sense of humor.

"Another issue is that you signed on with the Winter Court as part of the bargain that fixed your back and gained their support against the vampires," continued Peter. "How does your not needing fey magic to heal your injuries affect the deal you made?"

Harry shook his had negatively. "I don't think it does. The Winter Queen still provided the healing. The fact that it later became irrelevant doesn't remove the debt incurred for that service. It also doesn't compensate for my faerie godmother's support during the fight." Despite prior slips, Harry was still trying not to say Mab's name out loud.

"You have a faerie godmother?" asked Taylor.

"She's his literal godmother who is also a member of the fae court and a dangerous foe," said Ellen, who had found the books about Harry to be quite interesting. "Don't think of the Disney version."

"Disney still exists in your time?" asked Peter.

Ripley nodded. "They're a pretty huge entertainment conglomerate."

"In my reality, Disney owns the legal rights to Spider-Man," said Dresden with a knowing grin.

"What, really?" asked Peter, surprised. He tried to imagine working for Disney. The idea was weird, although the thought of MJ dressed as a Disney princess was filed away for later consideration. "Regardless, is there anything you could think of that would get you out of being the Winter Knight?"

Dresden shook his head again. "The deal was for services already rendered, so the other side can't default. The only way to get out of it would be for me to be dismissed, which is highly unlikely and would likely be worse than dying, or for me to die, which was apparently my first option and didn't work, or for somebody to trade something of equal value to the Winter Queen to secure my release."

"That's something else to bring up with the Family, then, as we're apparently assuming infinite capability on their part," said Ellen.

"All right," said Dresden. "Do either of you have any other advice?"

"We need to find a way for you to spend more time with your daughter," said Ellen. Harry shouldn't make the same mistake she did.

"We also need to work on shoring up the White Council," added Peter. "The war with the vampires pretty much gutted the organization, leaving it even more vulnerable to the Black Council."

Harry said, "I would like nothing more than to spend more time with my daughter, as long as Maggie can be protected. As for the Black Council...I have to admit that I've put that on the back-burner due to my own issues. We'll need to check with my grandfather to see if any progress has been made on that front."

With that, the discussions of Harry's reality were complete. Jimmy volunteered to go next.

"One of the problems I have is many conflicting sources of information. The company that writes the comic books based on my reality has a nasty tendency to rewrite history as a way of raising sales," began Olsen. "There was an event called the, 'Crisis on Infinite Earths,' that collapsed a lot of different histories into a new, revised reality. The issue for me is that, as an inhabitant of that universe, I would have no idea if that had ever really happened. My memories would have been reset with everybody else's."

"The Family might be able to determine if something like that had occurred," suggested Taylor. She and Xander had been tasked with reviewing the DC Comics reality. "There might be tells that we can detect once we're in your reality."

Jimmy considered that, but said, "I'm not sure it matters? I mean, something that dramatic would be almost impossible to correct. In any event, I've made notes on some of the worst events in the comics. Lex Luthor was running for President of the United States when I was kidnapped, so we need to look out for the Imperiex plot-line. I've also made notes on Braniac, Darkseid, Circe, Ares, Joker, the League of Shadows, Sinestro and Parallax, Felix Faust, Amazo and the Anti-Monitor, along with a handful of lesser threats. Again, I have no idea which of the many plots any of them might try. I'm pretty sure that Lex Luthor never tried to sink half of California into the ocean, but I'm equally sure he's working against Superman with Cadmus."

"What about Cadmus and Task Force X?" prompted Xander. Task Force X was responsible for the Suicide Squads of super-villains doing the government's dirty work.

Jimmy raised his hands in a partial shrug. "The problem there is that the people involved have a certain amount of official sanction. They're also not entirely wrong to be worried about the Justice League if you look at things with a certain paranoid practicality. Some of the stories about what happens when the heroes do go off the rails are pretty damning. It would be really good if they could reign in some of their less prudent schemes, of course. There really aren't a lot of easy ways to balance all of the powerful beings in my reality, though."

"Another group that seriously needs some correction are the Guardians of Oa," suggested Xander.

"The founders of the Green Lantern Corps?" queried Jimmy.

Xander confirmed that with a nod, and continued with, "the Corps, as well as their predecessor, the Manhunters. They actually are the cause of a lot of terrible events in the DC universe. They appointed themselves the guardians of your galaxy because of their mistakes, and they seem to be dead set on amplifying those mistakes at every opportunity. Trapping Parallax inside the power source for the Corps is just one of a series of utterly bone-headed decisions made by people with more power than sense."

"When you describe them that way, they sound a bit like the Ancients in my universe," said Daniel. They had a nasty habit of ignoring the negative consequences of their actions -- like leaving treasure hordes of technology that could be exploited by the Goa'uld. They were more than willing to punish Orlin or Oma by causing or allowing destruction on a grand scale, but couldn't be bothered to, say, clean up or lock down devices capable of wiping out all life in the galaxy.

"From what you've said about them, that may be an apt comparison," said Jimmy. He hadn't included the Guardians in the list because he frankly wasn't that personally familiar with them, but Xander's comments made sense. "For that matter, it's worth looking at how and why super-powered criminals in general manage to keep escaping prison time. I'm not saying the Justice League needs to start killing them off, but allowing places like Gotham to pursue justice with a blatantly corrupt system isn't terribly effective."

"It wouldn't hurt to have a prison capable of holding super-villains," said Taylor. "We have the Birdcage in my world."

"That's the prison that you can't get out of even if it turns out you're innocent?" asked Peter. He shuddered a bit when Taylor just nodded.

"You've got a lot of hidden powers in your world, as well," commented Taylor. "Between the homo magi, the Atlanteans, the Amazons and their patron deities...and actors like the League of Shadows...wouldn't it be better to have more things out in the open?"

"You might think that," said Jimmy with a smile, "but what you're touching on is the difference between a puzzle and a mystery."

"What's the difference?" asked the teen.

"A puzzle is something that gets easier to solve when you get more information," answered Daniel. "A mystery, on the other hand, suffers from having too much information. The trick with a mystery is figuring out which bits of information are relevant, and what pattern they form."

"Exactly," confirmed Jimmy. "Don't forget that there are representatives of the homo magi, the Atlanteans and the Amazons in the Justice League. They also have heroes like Batman and the Question watching and researching villains and villainous organizations. The hard part is trying to figure out where the problems lie that need solving. As for groups like the Amazons or the Atlanteans, well, they're independent peoples. Who are we to tell them that they have to publicize or share details about their homeland?"

"I've got a question about the League," said Peter. "You've mentioned that there are a lot of aliens with advanced technology in the Justice League. Why isn't Earth at a higher level of technology overall?"

"It is, to an extent. A lot of alien technology is researched and released by places like S.T.A.R. Labs, and say what you will about Luthor, his companies do release advanced technology into the marketplace. Wayne Industries does as well. Part of the issues, though, are regulatory. There's a lot of pressure from companies lobbying in the U.S. and the E.U. to avoid disrupting markets too much. Anything that involves pharmaceuticals or medicine, nanotechnology, high energy physics, artificial intelligence and a few other restricted areas require government approval," explained Jimmy. "That's true even if the technologies are used solely in the manufacturing process."

"That does explain why you still have amputees with false limbs when you also have people like Cyborg walking around," said Xander.

"Right, so we have dimensional stability, specific super-villains capable of WMD-level catastrophes, issues with the Guardians, the lack of an effective justice system suitable for dealing with super-villains, the need for checks and balances on the League that don't cause worse problems, and the issue with restrictive economic policies in relation to advanced technology," listed Jimmy. "Anything else?"

"Does Earth have any kind of space-based defense from invasion?" asked Miles. "It seems like you have a sizable alien population, so there must be invasion threats."

"Yeah," added Xander. "Earth has suffered from invasions by a bunch of different alien races if the comics are at all accurate."

Jimmy replied, "Well, it hasn't happened as much as in the comics, but there is definitely a risk there. I think the problem is that none of the Earth governments want space-based weapons floating overhead under somebody else's control. In any event, I'm not sure there is anything anybody could do unilaterally that wouldn't cause other problems. People also tend to get complacent because the Justice League is there to fight off aliens."

Peter finished his soda and said, "Have we covered Jimmy's reality well-enough?" There were some acknowledgements around the room. "If that's the case, I may as well go. I have similar issues to Jimmy in that there are many, many different versions of my world, with lots of stories about potential world-ending super-villains. I have a list of folks like Loki, Ultron, Magneto, Dark Phoenix, Thanos...but some of those may either happen differently or may not happen. I have no idea what Thor's family situation is, for example. I can reach out to the X-Men and the Avengers for some of it. I know the Fantastic Four already dealt with Galactus, and Doctor Strange has handled his share of supernatural terrors. I also know for a fact that the alien situation is, if anything, even worse than in Jimmy's world. We have the Kree, the Skrulls, the Shi'ar, the Badoon, etcetera." He wasn't sure how he was going to go to Doc Xavier and ask if his protege was channeling a force of cosmic destruction in her spare time.

Taylor and Jimmy were responsible for looking at Peter's world. Taylor said, "One of the things that stands out to me is the whole mutant issue. In my world, capes are feared for certain sets of powers -- if they can control other people, for example, or create self-replicating monsters. I really don't get why natural mutants are hated and feared, but Spider-Man and the Fantastic Four get a pass just because your powers were introduced rather than you being born with them?"

Peter winced a bit. "It's not all like that," replied Peter. "A lot of folks don't like anybody with superpowers. The Hulk is also feared because he's basically an unstoppable rage monster, even if he does a lot of good otherwise."

"While undoubtedly true," said Jimmy, "a lot of the comics make it clear that anti-mutant sentiment is deliberately caused by actors like Mr. Sinister and Apocalypse. It's clear that there are anti-mutant agitators, some of whom are mutants themselves. That feeds into things like the Superhero Registration Act."

"Which doesn't exist in my reality," said Peter.

"Yet. It isn't impossible based on what you've told us," argued Taylor. "I can tell you that laws restricting capes can be easy to get passed if you frame your arguments to the public the right way." Lord knows there were plenty of restrictive laws in her world.

"Oh, two other things I haven't mentioned yet that are on my list are keeping an eye on Stark in case he starts to go off the rails, as he does in some stories. I also intend to look out for the alien symbiotes, as I have no desire to have to fight either Venom or Carnage," said Peter. "Doctor Strange may be able to help with that."

"Don't forget that Strange actually teamed up with Stark, Richards, Xavier, Namor and Black Bolt of the Inhumans in the comics to try and run things behind the scenes," added Jimmy.

"I'll be talking to Nick Fury, too. He needs to be aware that S.H.I.E.L.D. might be infiltrated by Hydra. I can also give him the heads-up about the Illuminati of folks too smart for their own good," replied Peter.

"So," said Jimmy, raising his hands to tick off points, "we have general super-villains, anti-mutant sentiment, anti-superpower legislation, secret cabals running things behind the scenes, the subversion of S.H.I.E.L.D. by Nazis, and we should probably add time travel into that list. It happens in my universe, but yours seems prone to dramatic timeline shifts more than the collapsing of walls between dimensions that supposedly happens all the time in mine."

"Time travel is always a good thing to watch out for," commented O'Brien.

"And don't make any deals with the devil," added Taylor.

"Duh." said Peter. "That had to be an alternate universe Peter, as I was never that stupid even when I was younger."

"One thing I was wondering," started Xander, "is why your universe doesn't have an equivalent of the Justice League?"

"Power levels and personalities," said Jimmy almost immediately. "The Justice League was founded by an invincible, super-strong alien from a technologically-advanced civilization, a demi-goddess, one of the richest men in the world who also happens to be the world's greatest detective, the king of Atlantis, a massively powerful telepathic alien, a member of the Green Lantern Corps, and a guy who can run at the speed of light. Now look at the most powerful Avengers. Thor doesn't really consider Earth his home. Hulk has rage issues. Sentry is crazy and apparently doesn't exist in Peter's reality. Doctor Strange has his own set of responsibilities that nobody else can do, and many of the others are mutants with all the baggage associated with that in Peter's universe. Add in the role of the morally questionable S.H.I.E.L.D. and the fact that Stark is an alcoholic narcissist and you don't have the necessary combination of people both willing to work together and also powerful enough to stay independent."

"I'm now adding Tony Stark to the list of people I want to observe while they meet the Family for the first time," said Peter. "Also, I think that's more than enough to start with for my reality. Let's move on to Taylor's world, which also happens to be an analog for our current universe-of-residence." Peter and Jimmy were tasked with researching this Earth on the local Internet.

"Hmm," said Taylor, "well, we have the threats that have been ranked by the PRT as S- and A-class like the Endbringers. It's also not hard to see that the laws seem almost designed to force capes into either the Protectorate or a life of super-villainy."

"I'm going to go ahead and say that there's nothing 'almost' about it," said Jimmy. "While I'm not a lawyer, I did look into the relevant laws and it is not only almost impossible for independents to earn a living using their powers, it's also quite easy to run afoul of the law and have the Protectorate essentially draft capes. That's pretty much what happened with Shadow Stalker."

Taylor grimaced. "There's a reason I don't trust the PRT or the Protectorate. They seem to be far more interested in public relations than they are in actually making a difference. On top of that, from what the Family says, the local branch was heavily infiltrated by a local super-villain, Coil, and at least two of the other gangs also had informants embedded in the PRT."

"There's also something seriously wrong with capes in this universe," inserted Peter.

"What do you mean?" asked Taylor.

"I read some of the accounts of cape battles on PHO, which usually have more details than the media outlets," said Peter. Jimmy frowned but couldn't argue the point. "What I noticed," continued Peter, "is that capes in your world seem to take crazy excessive risks."

"Being a cape is dangerous. Isn't that true in your world?" asked Taylor.

"Yes, but here's the thing. I've been in a lot of super-powered battles in my career with a lot of different foes. I've fought villains that were criminally insane, as well as guys that were in it for the money or were fighting for a cause. Some of them were just too dumb to come up with a better way to make cash. Almost all of them, though, know when to run or surrender, and when to avoid a pointless fight." Peter pointed at the tabletop for emphasis with his next points. "Your capes on both sides of the hero/villain divide are too quick to fight, and in fact seem to go looking for trouble. They also don't retreat in situations when they obviously should. A consequence of that is that the laws used to try and control them are draconian. I mean, you have prepared kill orders for some capes, like that tinker in Boston, just on the chance that they're going to do something horrible. Even in places with the death penalty in my world, you would need a trial before a sentence like that."

"Having superpowers in this world definitely seems to have a more drastic psychological impact than I would expect," agreed Jimmy. "Part of it is probably how you get powers, and I'm sorry, I know trigger events are a sensitive topic." Taylor's lips tightened but she just nodded. "Even accounting for that," continued Jimmy, "cape aggression seems very high."

"I wonder if the Family knows anything about that?" asked Xander. "I mean, they don't seem to fit the mold for typical capes, and they have the whole giant lizard thing. They sound like outsiders, and I would expect, given their abilities, that they would have noticed something wacky about the local superpowers."

"You think they're actually aliens?" asked Jimmy.

"It would explain a few things," commented Peter.

Taylor kept quiet, as she knew that the truth was much stranger, but it wasn't her story to share. The fact that Harry kept quiet meant he probably thought the same, or else he had his own reasons. Instead, she said, "All right, so apart from the known threats and the legal treatment of capes, you think there's something inherently mind-altering about powers?" The idea was a little terrifying, to be honest.

"Almost certainly," said Jimmy, while Peter just nodded his agreement. "There's also something very strange about what PHO calls the Case 53's," said Jimmy. "They have common features of memory loss and extreme body changes from the baseline human form. They also all have the same tattoo in the shape of an omega. Pete, what does that suggest to you?"

"It means they all come from the same place, and somebody is wiping their memory to hide where that is," said Peter. "Add in the fact that nobody has ever been present for the trigger of a Case 53, and it looks like somebody is creating them."

"How do you know nobody has seen one trigger?" asked Taylor.

"We aren't 100% sure," said Jimmy, "but if you dig through the accounts of triggers, you can find descriptions of trigger events. New Wave, for example, doesn't maintain a set of secret identities, and there were other, massively public trigger events. We couldn't find any reference to a Case 53 having one observed, and you would think somebody would notice a person changing into a non-human form. Instead, they are inevitably found unconscious somewhere well after they've triggered."

Taylor thought about that for a bit. She wondered if Faultline knew anything about that, as her crew was known to have an interest in information on Case 53's specifically. "You think somebody knows how to create capes?" If that was the case, then it was a game-changer.

"Either that, or somebody is kidnapping capes and experimenting on them, and the results are Case 53's. The problem with that theory is that you don't have nearly enough vanished capes to account for all of the new Case 53's. Either they're kidnapping existing capes, or somebody is catching them right when they trigger, which seems implausible given the numbers," explained Jimmy.

"There are all sorts of weird conspiracy theories online," said Peter. "But the fact that nobody knows where powers came from is all kinds of weird. In mine and Jimmy's world, powers come from mutagens, mystical sources, or because somebody wasn't born human, like Thor or Superman. In yours, it seems to happen spontaneously based on high-stress incidents."

"The whole way that tinkers work also supports that," added Miles. "Dragon explained that their powers change their behavior enough that they can't consistently follow the scientific method. It's like there is a conspiracy to keep them from having too much of an impact on society."

"Tinkers who are too promising also tend to be targeted in Endbringer attacks," mentioned Taylor. "That, at least, is a common theory."

"That sounds like the Endbringers themselves are actually weapons sent to attack specific targets," ventured Ripley.

"I think we've got plenty to talk to the Family about for Taylor's reality," said Jimmy.

Harry stood up. "Why don't we all compile our notes and the feedback into written summaries that we can present to our hosts?"

There was general agreement on that course of action, and soon everybody was heading off to either start that task, or work on other tasks that had been postponed for the meeting.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

Taylor was sitting in her English class, listening to one of her classmates struggle with reading a passage from A Merchant of Venice. To somebody with a parent who had been an English teacher, it was slightly torturous to hear.

'What do you think our guests are up to right now?' she silently asked Varga.

"If I had to guess, I would say they're compiling their findings. It's been pretty obvious that they've dedicated more time this week to looking into different realities, and it seems that they've decided to have non-natives spot check their data," he answered.

She grinned to herself. 'I bet Jimmy was the one who suggested that. He's got the research skills.'

"I agree. Who do you think triggered this new round of research?" asked Varga.

She thought about it. 'Well, Xander is known for coming up with surprising insights at times. On the other hand, Jimmy is an investigative reporter and Harry is a detective.' She could sense Varga was amused at that. 'What's so funny?'

The demon replied, "The one person with the largest change in their attitude would be your analog, Brain."

That was a little surprising to Taylor. Alt-Taylor had been in a funk. It would probably be hard to find out that there was another universe almost exactly like yours, except in that one, you won the lottery instead of getting hit by a truck. 'What do you think made the difference?' she asked.

"Out of all of the travelers, she and Harry know the most about our true capabilities. To paraphrase, powers are bullshit, and you hit the power jackpot, at least from the perspective of a typical cape in this world," said Varga. "You're very intelligent, and I'm sure she is as well, and simply realized the potential we had for making changes, especially as she's the only one who can see the differences we've made in this reality versus hers."

That made a certain amount of sense. The world alt-Taylor described was very different from the current state of Brockton Bay, and most of it seemed to be centered on the Family. 'I have a sneaking suspicion that they'll have a list of problems for us to look at by the weekend, which hopefully will save us some work, seeing as how we were planning to shake things up in their worlds in any event.'

"So what do you want to do this evening, Brain?" asked Varga.

Taylor had to fight down a giggle, as that would have been out of place in class. 'The same thing we do every night, Varga, plot to make over the worlds!'

The internal amusement lasted until the end of the period. Thankfully, another student -- one whose tongue didn't trip quite so much over iambic pentameter -- had soon taken over from the earlier reader and finished out the class.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

Lisa let herself into the BBFO office, only to find Amy already there. "Did you run here right after school?" she asked Amy.

"I had a free period at the end of the day. Also, I have an idea for how to test the wormhole drive across dimensions. Here, look at this," said Amy.

Lisa went over to look at what Amy was doing. "What is that?"

"It's a timeline. I have to get the sequencing right for this. There are two viruses and a bacterium, but the viruses need to only activate when there is a big enough concentration of the bacteria," explained Amy.

"Huh. It seems complicated," said Lisa.

Amy nodded. "Oh, it is. The healing symbiotes are much better options, but they have to be applied individually, and there isn't time for that."

Lisa looked at her, surprised. "You want to go back there?"

"It's as good a destination as any, and while we're there, we might as well do some good," Amy answered.

"The PRT would have a fit looking at these," smirked Lisa.

"Which is exactly why I'm not doing anything until we're already absent from this reality," said Amy. "We just need to time it right."

They had the plans all worked out by the time Taylor showed up.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

Doctor Rodriguez was waiting with the marine contingent in the shuttle bay of Gateway Station. Every refugee shuttle was a potential horror show these days, and this one had radioed a medical emergency while they were in ascent from Earth. Lieutenant Stephens spoke into his headpiece, "Control, do you still have voice contact with the occupants?" The response was inaudible to the others, but the officer said, "All right, we're a go!" With that, the airlock door was cycled, and a fire team of marines went inside, rifles at the ready. When the inner door to the shuttle opened, the marines rushed in.

Rodriguez waited while the marines checked out the interior. The other passengers were all shuffled out of the shuttle and moved to a quarantine room. Finally, a sergeant stuck her head out of the shuttle and nodded to the doctor and his team. The team went in and were lead to where a woman was lying unconscious in one corner of the passenger cabin.

"Was she unconscious when you entered the compartment?" asked one of the medical techs.

"Yes," said the sergeant with a slight glare. "The other passengers said she collapsed on the ride up." She apparently didn't like the implication that the marines had injured her.

The tech finished his scan. "OK, she's not implanted." The tension in the shuttle dropped slightly. "She's also stable, so let's get her onto the stretcher."

Rodriguez waited until they were in the station medical facility before starting his examination. It wasn't long before he was very, very confused. Half-an-hour later, he was contacting the station commander.

"Colonel Petrov, I just completed my examination of the passenger who collapsed on the shuttle," said the doctor.

'Is there something I need to be concerned with, Doctor?' asked the commander with a mild Russian accent.

"The woman was infested with a xenomorph, Colonel," said the doctor.

There was a pause. 'The initial report from the shuttle said she was not infested.'

"By the time she got to the station, she was no longer infested," answered Rodriguez, "and before you ask, yes, she is still alive, and no, the xenomorph was not alive when the shuttle docked. It somehow died in transit."

'How is that possible, Doctor? Was this woman just incredibly lucky?' asked the colonel.

The doctor snorted. "She undoubtedly was incredibly lucky. However, I need to do a lot more investigation before I can even pretend to have an idea of what happened."

There was a more extensive pause on the line, and Rodriguez could hear the commander speaking with somebody else briefly. When the colonel came back, his tone had changed. 'Doctor, go ahead and do your investigation. We're getting some very strange reports that may be related.'

"Anything that can help me get started?" asked Rodriguez.

'I'm not sure, Doctor. Let me know what you learn.' The line closed without further comment.

"All right," said Rodriguez to his team. "Do a draw for a full blood series, and let's run a complete 3D sensor scan -- MRI, CAT, sonogram, penetrating infrared, refractive lipodensity and active neurologic." They had a lot of work ahead of them.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

Tomas cracked open one of the reinforced shelter doors after the sun had crested over the horizon in Quito. In his hands, he gripped his shotgun a little too tightly. Heading out in the morning was always a risk, and not everybody made it back. The extraños sometimes waited around to catch people leaving the shelters in the morning, and the bastards had gotten smart enough to destroy the external cameras a week ago.

He pushed the door open. The interior door was already locked shut as a safety precaution. Even if he were killed, the shelter wouldn't be compromised. The sunlight shone against a puddle on the asphalt, and there was no movement. Even the rats and pigeons fled or were killed by the extraños. Raising the shotgun, he stepped out. As he turned, he noticed something and jumped back in a panic, firing the gun on reflex.

There was a large, black corpse of an extraño right next to the damned door. The shotgun blast punched a crater into the top of its exoskeleton, and Tomas screamed as he was splashed with blood from the wound. He kept screaming for a good ninety seconds, until he realized that he wasn't burning from the acid. Then he noticed that it didn't smell very good. After a minute of trying to absorb what was happening, he went to examine the corpse. There was no sign of what had killed the monster.

There were no signs on any of the other five corpses scattered around the shelter, either.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

Freddie was breathing heavy. Every single fucking nest-run like this was a nightmare waiting to happen. Somebody had to go into the drainage pipes, basements and tunnels of Chicago and flush out the xenos before they infected more people, though, and that someone was the goddamned United States Army, and Freddie was a private in that same army. Lucky him.

Sergeant Prescott was leading them into the basement of a department store that had closed long before the xenos showed up. Freddie didn't know why they hadn't just dynamited the fucking building, but probably the owner still knew somebody important. There had been some disappearances nearby, which these days often meant the start of a xeno infestation, with the rare exception of somebody using the crisis to take care of somebody they wanted killed. Humans were kind of assholes that way. Regardless, it needed checking out by somebody with enough firepower to have a chance of taking on a nest.

At the foot of the stairwell by the basement entrance, the sergeant motioned for two of the squad to take up position. The lights in the whole building were out, so the only illumination came from tactical flashlights. The shifting shadows constantly seemed to move in his peripheral vision. Freddie's job this time would be to rush in after the initial entry. He had to admit, Sergeant Prescott was a badass. He was first into a room as often as he delegated that to one of his men, and there was always a good reason for his choice. This time, Prescott himself pushed the door open quietly and slipped inside with the two other soldiers as backup. Freddie waited for the go signal, but instead, after a full minute or two, the sergeant's voice came back with an unexpected, "CLEAR!" The soldier exchanged a surprised glance with Michaelson and Cho before lowering his gun from ready and heading into the room after his NCO. At first sight, he started to quickly raise his gun, profanity on his lips, but he stopped moving when his sergeant yelled, "Hold!"

There were maybe a dozen eggs on the floor, but once he stopped to look, he could see that they looked...off. They normally looked creepy as fuck, what with the moisture and the moving of the skin as the facehugger shifted. These eggs were different. They almost looked dried out, like raisins in the sun.

"What the hell?" muttered Private Cho out loud.

Prescott kicked one of the eggs with his combat boot. It cracked open, and an obviously dead facehugger fell out. "They're dead," said the sergeant, stating the obvious. Even if he was feeling stupid, Freddie wouldn't have called him on it.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

'Officials have confirmed that, so far, all of the aliens discovered in the last three days have been dead. They caution, however, that the emergency is not yet officially over, and that citizens should still remain wary of going out at night, and should still report missing persons to authorities as soon as possible. We also have reports from Mass General stating that they have treated several patients who claim to have been infected, and yet those patients are no longer hosts for the parasitic aliens...'

Metis switched off the radio feed. "Well, it sounds like it worked perfectly."

"Did you have any doubts?" asked Ianthe with a smirk. Admittedly, the combination of micro-organisms beamed into the Earth's atmosphere had a complex lifecycle. First, a bacterium designed to neutralize the acid from a xenomorph's blood had to build up to a certain density. The bacteria fed on the acid and created a mild base as a waste product, which also helped neutralize the dangerously acidic blood. Once enough of that base was present, the two viruses released would act. The first would act on an infected xenomorph, quickly paralyzing the creature and stopping respiratory functions. The second infected humans, triggering a massive immune reaction against any xenomorph tissue present in the body. This could lead to severe fevers, unconsciousness, and other side effects...but nothing more lethal than having an alien parasite tear its way out of your rib cage. The combination of the two viruses quickly broke down the xenomorph tissues in infected humans. For adult xenomorphs, the result was a speedy death.

"How long will your bio-agents continue to work?" asked Ripley.

"Earth will be a death trap for xenomorphs for years, and anybody infected will be immune to implantation," replied the purple lizard. "Unfortunately, the main xenomorph virus won't spread off Earth...at least not easily. The micro-organisms are all designed to perish with normal household cleaning products."

"How is that possible?" asked Jimmy. "If cleaning products can kill them, then how could they possibly survive in one of those things long enough to kill them?"

Metis smirked. "It's possible because that is exactly what they were designed to do. Family bioshapers are quite adept at that."

"I guess this counts as a successful test of the cross-dimensional drive system," said Miles. It had been strange to watch, cloaked, as the earlier version of the Ship of Fools appeared near Earth, then vanished again. They had been in orbit for several days already while Ianthe created her brew of xenocidal contagions, but they couldn't do anything that might alert their past selves lest they create a paradox. Miles knew the Department of Temporal Investigations back home would have had a fit about it despite their precautions, but the Family wasn't willing to wait any longer than absolutely necessary to deploy the anti-xeno organisms.

Mission accomplished, they jumped the ship back to Mars orbit of the Family's home dimension, and then they jumped into their warehouse hideaway. After a full week in another reality, they returned only an hour after they left. The wormhole drive easily passed the test.
 
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I really don't get why natural mutants are hated and feared, but Spider-Man and the Fantastic Four get a pass just because your powers were introduced rather than you being born with them."
Not using the Virus as a reason? Or haven't they come across that?

Sentry is crazy and apparently doesn't exist in Peter's reality.
Or does he exist and Peter's memories have been altered to not remember him?
 
Fascinating. I seem to be the first poster after a new chapter has appeared. Thank you for your work. I am most intrigued to find out how the Family solve the multi-verses problems.

[Added]
Ah, not quite the first. A bit to slow in posting it appears.
 
Fascinating. I seem to be the first poster after a new chapter has appeared. Thank you for your work. I am most intrigued to find out how the Family solve the multi-verses problems.

[Added]
Ah, not quite the first. A bit to slow in posting it appears.

Just a tip, calling 'First' or similar tends to be looked down by Mods as a non-content post.

Also, the first world's more or less been fixed, at least the bigger, yet short term, problem, I wonder what else they will do.
 
The Wonderful Lizard of Oz
For anybody who hasn't seen it (which you probably have, as I told you to read T/V before reading this), here are the combined threadmarks for the Lizard of Oz Omake in mpPi's thread.

We're Off to See the Lizard...
...the Wonderful Lizard of Oz
She Really Is a Wonderful Liz...
...If Ever a Liz There Was!
If Ever, If Ever a Liz There Was...
...the Lizard of Oz Is One Because...
...Because, Because, Because, Because, BECAUSE...
...Because of the Wonderful Things She Does!

Edit: I put this in here on the off chance that it got missed (e.g., you're skipping the omakes embedded in T/V), and because this was my first multi-part T/V omake, the success of which inspired this one.
 
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OK, so I was wrong about the Asgard teleporter. It's the same type of thing as Trek: rip your bits to bits, then send them off with reassembly instructions and hope the receiving station isn't having a dramatic plot moment.

Well the Asgard Transporter doesn't need a receiving station, it's straight point-to-point, so you only need to worry about the projection device failing mid-transport.
That said, at no point in Stargate does a Transporter ever have any serious kind of failure like copying a person or turning them into a computer program, unlike the Star Trek Transporter. The worst thing that happens with a Stargate Transporter is if you activate a Ring Transporter while something is only half-way inside the rings, in which case only the parts that are inside get transported and the thing is cut in half. IIRC the SGC's Stargate fucks up at one point and stores the team in its 'storage' instead of re materializing them, and there's a race to figure out why and get it to work properly before some time limit elapses and the gate purges its storage. But that's fairly tame by Star Trek standards, and the SGC's gate is jail-broken to hell and back and missing its original programming, so it behaving oddly isn't entirely the Ancients fault.
All the other issues with Stargates that crop up are down to incredibly unlikely, nearly impossible to replicate circumstances; like activating a wormhole that passes through a star at the exact same moment that it goes supernova and stuff like that.

By the way, does anybody who watches Discovery know how the spore drive works? It somehow involves mushrooms? Did they manage to weaponize Super Mario in the Star Trek universe? I've been explicitly avoiding STD references in the fic (and isn't that an unfortunate abbreviation?).
Alright, so, the Spore Drive.
There is this magic fungus, it has a fancy name that loosely means 'first plant star traveller', the important thing about this fungus is that it primarily lives in subspace, forming a massive multiverse-spanning mushroom ring which pokes little mushroom protrusions into real-space to release spores and reproduce, much like a normal mushroom except in subspace. The Spore Drive works by jumping into the magic subspace fungus dimension and then jumping out back into reality at the desired location. The problem is that the jumping is 'probabilistic' which apparently means that the longer the jump, the greater the number of possible exit points. This is a problem because the network is so fuckin huge that the number of possible exit points becomes incomprehensibly vast and impossible to sift through within milliseconds, and the ships had insufficient computing power to figure out the desired exit point before the native magic subspace fungus ate the invader.
Fortunately, they found a magic alien tardigrade that existed in multiple dimensions at the same time, was probably sentient and had a symbiotic relationship with the magic subspace fungus by just grabbing some fungus DNA and jamming that shit into its own genetic code, which worked because magic alien tardigrade. Because the tardigrade is both magical and multidimensional, it naturally has the innate ability to perceive and navigate through higher dimensional physics, as well as the ability to navigate the magic subspace mushroom ring to teleport around the multiverse at-will. So they jacked the magic alien tardigrade into their computers and used it to do the calculations, boom! Point to point teleportation.
Unfortunately, the magic alien tardigrade didn't take well to this treatment, and it turns out jacking it into computers and forcibly using its mind as a navigation computer was literally destroying its brain with every use. Fortunately, the magic alien tardigrade was able to just jam other creatures DNA into itself, so logically it should be fine to just jam some magic alien tardigrade DNA into a human. So they did that and bam, the human gained the same ability to perceive and navigate higher dimensions as well as the magic subspace mushroom ring, with the minor side effect of progressive neurological damage from having his brain used as a navigation computer and ending up existing slightly outside of conventional space\time, making him a bit loopy. Fortunately the magic subspace mushroom ring can store minds, so when his brain inevitably burned out his mind just hid out in the magic fungus dimension and the crew were able to track him down, fix up his body and shove him back in it A-OK.

In short, the Spore Drive works because of magic subspace fungus and magic alien tardigrade DNA. On the bright side, it has never needed to have its polarity reversed, so that's something.

Dealing with the Ascended will be very interesting. I don't know how they stack up against Taylor and Leet's tech, but I would personally classify them as 'Lowly Pissants'.
I'm fairly confident that the Varga outmasses the Ascended in both dimensional axis and personal ability by several orders of magnitude, I'd expect something along the lines of the Ascended all shitting themselves as an incomprehensibly massively old being erupts from the ground Super TTGL style while the Ascended stare on in collective shock and horror.

Or there's the similar device that caused a chunk of the galaxy to get caught in a day-long time-loop for months. Then there's the machine that created EXPLODING TUMORS in Atlantis. There was also the energy extraction experiment that Rodney used to accidentally blow up a solar system. Oh, and there was the device that destroyed Wraith hyperdrives when turned on...and also happened to make Stargates BLOW UP when used. Or Janus's time machine puddle jumper, which was just left lying around. How about the knowledge archives that would randomly grab anybody who walked by and shove so much data into their brains that they would die as even the autonomic functions were overwritten? Let's not forget that Ancients and Lanteans were responsible for both Anubis and the Wraith, respectively.
Yep, the Ancients were utterly incapable of considering the consequences of their actions or realizing that other people weren't them. The knowledge archives for example? Works fine on Ancients\Lanteans, no problems at all. It's only everyone else whose brain melts, and they never consider the possibility of anyone using any of their tech who doesn't already know how it works and what its inherent dangers are.
 
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