I can slow things way the fuck down if that's what the readers would be comfortable with. Between laying out hints as to identities, and setting up plans to deal with them in between-fight-chapters, I just was fairly certain the readers weren't entirely interested in that.
I am obviously only one person. If the rest of the thread feels differently, then ignore me.

But I do dislike the breakneck boss rush style. It feels very much un-fate. Like, from FSN to FGO we always encountered whichever servant was the focus/opponent of the arc and got to learn more about them. Learned their identity, fall back, form a plan, try to enact it, get caught off guard or pull it off, have two or more encounters as we figure out what's the deal with that character before coming to some sort of conclusion.

It feels like this boss rush sort of loses the spirit and gravitas of "these are famous figures from history or legend, you have to figure out how to overcome them" to just turn them into speed bumps where the only option is "hope that you can brute force this encounter with a random mob without losing party members"
 
I am obviously only one person. If the rest of the thread feels differently, then ignore me.

But I do dislike the breakneck boss rush style. It feels very much un-fate. Like, from FSN to FGO we always encountered whichever servant was the focus/opponent of the arc and got to learn more about them. Learned their identity, fall back, form a plan, try to enact it, get caught off guard or pull it off, have two or more encounters as we figure out what's the deal with that character before coming to some sort of conclusion.

It feels like this boss rush sort of loses the spirit and gravitas of "these are famous figures from history or legend, you have to figure out how to overcome them" to just turn them into speed bumps where the only option is "hope that you can brute force this encounter with a random mob without losing party members"
I do share those feelings with you. The Boss Rush just doesn't leave space for Actions outside of pushing forward, fighting, and praying none of the girls get killed
 
I can slow things way the fuck down if that's what the readers would be comfortable with. Between laying out hints as to identities, and setting up plans to deal with them in between-fight-chapters, I just was fairly certain the readers weren't entirely interested in that.
I'd be fine with slowing things down. Sauron has clearly been doing freaky things with time and space, which is perfect justification to draw things out. Plus, it gives him a chance to observe the opposition, which is like, a big Sauron thing(giant flaming eye).
 
Alright...

I'll see what I can come up with. I'm sorry for the disappointment. This story has been the hardest thing I've ever had to write, and I've written many at this point. I don't know if I can fix it. But I'll try. Right now I'm so despondent I can't think straight so don't expect anything from me right now. I thought I was doing better.
 
Alright...

I'll see what I can come up with. I'm sorry for the disappointment. This story has been the hardest thing I've ever had to write, and I've written many at this point. I don't know if I can fix it. But I'll try. Right now I'm so despondent I can't think straight so don't expect anything from me right now. I thought I was doing better.
We're still having fun with the story, so don't be so despondent. It's a good story, you can't expect it to turn out perfectly
 
Alright...

I'll see what I can come up with. I'm sorry for the disappointment. This story has been the hardest thing I've ever had to write, and I've written many at this point. I don't know if I can fix it. But I'll try. Right now I'm so despondent I can't think straight so don't expect anything from me right now. I thought I was doing better.
Make the next servant we fight Jason.
 
Alright...

I'll see what I can come up with. I'm sorry for the disappointment. This story has been the hardest thing I've ever had to write, and I've written many at this point. I don't know if I can fix it. But I'll try. Right now I'm so despondent I can't think straight so don't expect anything from me right now. I thought I was doing better.
Don't feel like that. It's still a good story and I enjoyed what you wrote. Your trying something very ambitious here incorporating a lot into an already nuanced and complex setting. Your doing fine honestly. There is nothing wrong with their being a little room for improvement.
 
I honestly think that having Sauron pop up in Fuyuki was a poor choice. It forced everything into this fast-paced, no room for errors situation. Combined with having almost no information on Sauron and his forces that is just a bit too much. You mention how you're trying to match the general feel of canon. Where Shirou would go in blind and get bodied by the big threat. The problem with using that here is this is a final boss rush. We don't expect to get to take a loss and come back later with more info for another attempt.
I would have preferred to have Sauron stay in London and Ophelia showing up to rally the other Masters to go there and stop him. That would have given us more time, info, and options.
The current set-up isn't horrible though. It just is a very different vibe than the rest of the story and that is likely throwing everybody off their game. As we progress through the tower it will likely start feeling better as we get used to it.
 
We're still having fun with the story, so don't be so despondent. It's a good story, you can't expect it to turn out perfectly
Most of my stories for the past few years have flailed around like this, I grow very tired of it.
Make the next servant we fight Jason.
Why? I like the guy.
Don't feel like that. It's still a good story and I enjoyed what you wrote. Your trying something very ambitious here incorporating a lot into an already nuanced and complex setting. Your doing fine honestly. There is nothing wrong with their being a little room for improvement.
It seems more than a 'little room for improvement' when I'm having to consider rollback, completely rework, or cancellation.
I honestly think that having Sauron pop up in Fuyuki was a poor choice. It forced everything into this fast-paced, no room for errors situation.
I was aiming for a big 'holy shit' moment, and for Sauron to show off the ego he canonically has. Frankly I didn't think it would be a problem in any capacity.
 
It seems more than a 'little room for improvement' when I'm having to consider rollback, completely rework, or cancellation.
I think what you have is still good. Reorienting things a little justified in quest as Anatarr changing tactics(feeding information to get information) to allow you to engage in exposition without needing either of the first two is possible, though not really necessary unless the change will make you feel more satisfied with this.

Are you feeling a bit burned out? I notice this isn't the only quest your running.
 
I notice a thread running through the comments of people really worried about the lethality, but I'd like to point out that it took literally avoiding interacting at all available opportunities, and even then, we had a break glass vision and people still voted to avoid her.

Beyond that, with Shirou's personality, a poor enough decision to kill off one or more characters is probably going to result in Shirou trying to intervene hard enough to get collateral damaged. And then we have a Taiga Dojo, I know we've been dodging those since the early quest, but they are a thing here.
 
No I've been running multiple quests for years. This is me feeling like a failure because I just want to make people happy and I'm fairly bad at it.
I mean, I'm pretty happy? Stressed for other reasons, but well entertained. You've done a pretty good job at it to be honest, and with a main character I'm disinclined towards to boot.

You've kept true to all the characters while taking the setting for a hard right turn and delivered moments of levity and grief with equal impact through a broad spectrum of situations. I've enjoyed the gags, the tear jerkers, and the revelations, and the training. I'll still be here for this either way because I am infact enjoying it, even if I show up late sometimes.
 
And I'm glad to hear it, doesn't mean I don't feel like a massive fuckup.
I'm sorry to hear that and hope you feel better about yourself soon. As someone who hasn't managed to buckle down and actually try my hand at questing, you managing several is pretty impressive from where I'm standing even before you writing my favorite fate material on SV is factored in. thanks for many memorable updates.
 
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I'm sorry to hear that and hope you feel better about yourself soon. As someone who hasn't managed to buckle down and actually try my hand at questing, you managing several is pretty impressive from where I'm standing even before you writing my favorite fate material on SV is factored in. thanks for many memorable updates.
You are very welcome.
 
Today you'll be having a sit down with Ophelia (Medea is forcing it) to get information. Then we'll be having a new vote.
 
Today you'll be having a sit down with Ophelia (Medea is forcing it) to get information. Then we'll be having a new vote.
I know I'll be looking forward to it. I think a preamble before each potential boss fight would help us prep ourselves for what we're getting into and gives you a chance to flesh out the opponent some.

As for the story itself, the reason I've been quiet about my own voting is because there's a chance a wrong vote will get someone killed and you've given us alot of emotional investment in the women that are in Shirou's life. Makes me hesitant to blindly throw myself in any direction, but I would say worrying about the people in your story is a sign that you are a good writer.

I'd rather you put your feet up and get some rest and recoup before coming back to work.
 
8.45 - Information New

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2F54SPGOKhs

Next vote is coming up Monday. But here are some things to work off of.




"Ayako has damaged her arm, but it will be simple enough to fix. Though that Ophelia woman seems rather distraught at Kadoc's death." Medea says after a few moments, then she points at you, then points at the floor. "Sit."

"I don-"

Hands on your shoulder pushing you down, and a witch an inch from your face. "You will sit when I tell you to sit. We are not near done with this and I will not have you charging into the darkness in some valiant attempt at heroism."

You sit, not pouting. "My attempts have all been rather succes-"

You find yourself unable to talk as Ayako has clamped her mouth shut with her fingers. The magical-girl-in-training plopped down beside you by Circe, looking rather annoyed. Ayako, that is, Circe looked highly amused.

"Shut it." Ayako warns.

You roll your eyes as Medea begins to move her hands over you, a faint red mark still visible on her face from Taiga's slap.

"Ow!" Ayako yelps, and you look to the side to see Sakura helping hold her arm out straight, your girlfriend wincing.

"Sorry…" Sakura says quietly.

"Don't apologize girl." Circe chides. "The patient is just being whiny."

"My arm is broken!" Ayako growls.

"And yet you still have it after fighting Morgan Le Fay. Consider yourself a blessed girl." Circe teases.

"Really blessed." Fujimaru says, the woman walking over. Besides some scratches on her clothes she seemed unharmed, same for Shielder walking just behind and to her left. "Morgan's a pain in the ass to fight… don't ask me how I know." She smiles, it's the kind of smile you use from time to time to take the edge off. "Least it wasn't six of her at once. That wasn't a fun…" She crosses her arms and looks to the side. "How long were we there Mash?"

"Sixteen days and five hours." Shielder dutifully replies.

"Yeah that." Fujimaru says, then her eyes narrow and she looks across the room. "Ophelia, come here please."

Hesitant steps, followed by the clank of armor, and walking past you you see Ophelia, one hand raised up and closed in a fist. The knight just beside her, helmet removed to reveal a sweat covered, grinning face as he sets his gigantic palm down on his lithe master's shoulder. "... Yes?"

Fujimaru stares at the woman for a moment, then smiles. "Thanks for the help. But I'm going to need something from you."

Ophelia hesitates for a moment, her hand moving up to her wrapped ey-

"No, keep it." Fujimaru says. "Save it for when it's actually important. What I care about is getting jumped by Morgan le Fay being the bouncer. You were here for a while. What are we expecting up ahead?"

"I… I don't know any… names or anything." Ophelia says, her tone managing to be both nervous and apologetic.

"I know plenty of servants," Fujimaru replies. "Give me descriptions, what they look like, what they did. It'll at least give us something to work off of."

"Alright…" Ophelia says, then swallows. "I suppose… Well, the person closest to Oberon was Reines, Reines El-Melloi Archisorte. She was always by his side, so I don't expect we'll be running into her anytime soon… "

"I don't like her." Illya's voice interrupts.

Ophelia blinks, and looks to the small girl. "What?"

"She's stuck up." Illya continues.

"Agreed." Fujimaru says. "Ophelia, who's her servant?"

"A middle-eastern man. I don't know… who he is. But he dresses like he came from the time of the Crusades. The church tried to… stop all of this, and he took great pleasure in killing them all."

Fujimaru crosses her arms. "Alright, next?"

"Flauros… Flauros summoned a very panicked man. He was… American, I think? I didn't hear him speak much, he spent most of his time screaming and drawing strange marks on the wall… twigs kind of… By the time I saw him he was barely there, his eyes were completely blacked over and he had too many shadows."

"... Not ringing any bells. Phantom is a bit of a weirdo but he's French." Fujimaru says, cupping her chin with her hand.

"Does… that mean that he's weird because he's French? Or that it can't be him because he's French." Ayako asks.

"Yes." Fujimaru replies. "France is full of dragons and clones."

"I'm not… sure how to respond to that." Ayako replies.

"It is a whimsical place." Circe says airily. "Though I much preferred it in the old days."

"Flat summoned a man with green hair. He didn't speak much either, but Flat was following along with Oberon almost immediately… whenever they did the servants changed a bit. They grew… twisted. I suppose. Nothing was really noteworthy about him besides the fact that he had a sling-"

"David." Fujimaru interrupts. "That's David, King of Israel."

"David? Truly?" the knight by Ophelia's side asks.

Fujimaru nods. "Yeah, he's not particularly powerful but his noble phantasm is a bit of a problem."

"I shall look forward to freeing him from this vile influence." The knight says solemnly. "Ophelia, if we run into this man, stay behind me. He is known for his… proclivities."

"Um… alright?"

"Next?" Fujimaru asks.

"Svin… I'm not really sure. His servant was a tall man with red hair. But he was covered in a black cloak and had a white mask. I never heard him speak once."

"Any sight of his weapon?" Fujimaru asks.

"No… I never saw it." Ophelia says. "Sorry, but that's all I know. As for Luvia… I… I never actually saw it. I only heard it. Wolves howling, something laughing and… children singing songs. I haven't seen Luvia in a long while now. She disappeared, the wing she was in became impossibly dark, I could hear her… screaming, at times. But… I didn't see anything. It was all darkness."

"Could be a fucked up Nursery Rhyme." Fujimaru says. "But doesn't really sound like her. She never liked those kinds of stories."

"Lobo?" Mash offers.

Fujimaru shrugs. "Maybe." Then she looks back at Ophelia. "Was that everybody?"

Ophelia nods her head.

"Alright," she then looks at you. "We're wandering in half-blind, in a place filled with magical traps and defenses. Every servant is likely hostile and everyone is likely batshit crazy." She grins. "Fairly normal."

"We would best be careful then." Archer comments, looking towards the door out of the grand lobby.

"You always say that." Fujimaru replies. "Shirou, you good?"

You look at Medea, who glares at you, then nod. "Yeah, I'm fine. Let's get moving."

"My arm is still being un-broken." Ayako growls.

"... We can wait a few minutes."

---

One command seal remains for Mordred, two for Medea.

Present-

Taiga, with Mata Hari
Sakura, with Archer
Shirou, with Medea, Circe (Not a servant), and Mordred
Ayako, with Ruby
Fujimaru, with Shielder, Shadow Servants, and Luke
Ophelia, with an unknown Saber.
Illya, with Rider.




Present within the tower.

[Assassin - Alive]
[Caster - Dead]
[Archer - Alive]
[Lancer - Alive]
[Berserker - Alive]
[Rider - Alive]
 
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